The Science of Online Dating | Bella Glanville | TEDxPCL

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  • Опубліковано 28 лис 2024

КОМЕНТАРІ • 61

  • @ParkerHansenDomaingroup
    @ParkerHansenDomaingroup 3 роки тому +31

    We have only started dating online in the past 20 years, after 200,000 of dating in person online dating is simply out of sync with what humans have evolved to do. It's a disaster.

  • @DJWenlowe
    @DJWenlowe 3 роки тому +35

    Very good presentation and she's made some really valid points. The disparity in online response rates between women and men has resulted in a lot of men developing self esteem issues, particularly if they're not a part of the top 20% of men aesthetically. The successful 20% of guys find that they're in a really unique position whereby they can have their pick of dates but ironically then are always looking for the bigger, better deal so the women are simply used and discarded. Online dating is great in theory but in reality it's really, really flawed. Many daters burn out and get fed up of the apps after a while once this realisation hits them. There's a growing number of people who are ditching the apps and going back to trying to meet in traditional ways because of the many downsides of the online world. It's going to be interesting to see how things evolve in the next decade.

    • @ahumandoing6813
      @ahumandoing6813 2 роки тому +2

      In reality it's only the top 5% of guys that get any attention on dating apps.

    • @MrGayle_
      @MrGayle_ Рік тому +1

      True and about 95% of women go for that small set of men and ignoring the vast majority of "regular" guys

  • @theharrybennett
    @theharrybennett 2 роки тому +5

    99% are looking for quick wins.
    Only 1% is patient.
    There is no competition there.
    Huge potential if you know how to use the right tools right.

  • @psalmy26
    @psalmy26 Рік тому +1

    3:22 Love the sweeping diagnosis of a generation without a shred of evidence. So much for "science"

  • @agnbmotorsportsallgasnobra9470

    I enjoyed this video but the one thing I thought she was wrong about was when she said " we cant fall in love with people based of their personalities, they have to pass the attraction test first " online dating never created this....its always been this way.
    if certain metrics aren't met first, (physical attraction) then you aren't going to be able to be open to anything else they might have to say if these baseline metrics aren't met first. personal qualities are more important than, attraction, ....but alot of people just arent wired to look past that and see the person for who they are a make a good mate selection based of things that are going to be good for them in the long term.

  • @Deine_Omi
    @Deine_Omi 3 місяці тому

    Your explanation was outstanding, with captivating language that made the content truly engaging. The choice of words was exceptional, adding a layer of excitement that kept the narrative compelling throughout. Excellent work, your professionalism and attention to detail are truly commendable.

  • @OrdenJust
    @OrdenJust 2 роки тому +11

    I tried online dating. Couldn't make it work. Utterly impossible to get the ratio of carbon-12 to carbon-14. Now I do that part of archaeology only in the lab.

    • @AKU666
      @AKU666 2 роки тому

      Radiocarbon dating... Classic.

  • @CalicoCooperFan
    @CalicoCooperFan 3 роки тому +9

    She's right. People considerable relationships disposable. Marriages and significant others are considered disposable by many.

  • @aircoreX3
    @aircoreX3 7 місяців тому

    What about partnerships that form in virtual worlds such as games where you have an avatar/character that doesn't particularly represent the way you look in real life? Can they develop into something meaningful? Seeking individuals are exposed to the personality aspect rather than the aspect of looks (at least in the early stages of getting to know the person). Questions are: depending on how fast they set the pacing into finding out every detail of their life, does it determine how quickly the interest might dissolve? And are most people forming some sort of imagination of how their interest might look like which can cause dissapointment later on when said imagination turns out to be of significant difference? Thirdly, do people who choose to search for love in virtual spaces actually have a desire to go for the real deal (the real life)?

  • @Psychology_Exposed
    @Psychology_Exposed Рік тому +4

    Flawed. Women receiving more matches cannot be assumed to be men caring less about looks online.
    There are so many reasons for this. It would take too long here to go into why men swipe first, look at the profile after if reciporicated.

    • @SpamEmail-g1l
      @SpamEmail-g1l 9 місяців тому

      yeah I was thinking that too, for one thing men are much less careful regarding intimacy so they'll cast a wide net, for another they know matches are harder to get so they compensate by swiping right more often.

  • @BrentWLarison
    @BrentWLarison 3 роки тому +43

    “12% of people who use online dating find a committed relationship.”

    • @Deine_Omi
      @Deine_Omi 3 місяці тому

      Your explanation was outstanding, with captivating language that made the content truly engaging. The choice of words was exceptional, adding a layer of excitement that kept the narrative compelling throughout. Excellent work, your professionalism and attention to detail are truly commendable.

  • @alanmelinek5645
    @alanmelinek5645 3 роки тому +5

    Absolutely incredible talk!

  • @DesignTechnologyTV
    @DesignTechnologyTV 3 роки тому +1

    Omg I love her delivery!! This stuff is crazy :0

  • @jdjfjwjdof
    @jdjfjwjdof Рік тому +1

    very humbling

  • @Daemon1995_
    @Daemon1995_ 2 роки тому +1

    this is underrated

  • @adrianmonk4440
    @adrianmonk4440 Рік тому +1

    There IS Ratcheting Effect: If she wants A,B,C,D,E qualities THEN I want qualities A to H in them. So implicit bartering. Expectations grow.
    ///
    There is also Comparative Worth, a bundle of traits somehow on the balance scale of status, wealth, age, appearance, & BAGGAGE. I AM PRETTY JADED & SOMEWHAT EXPERIENCED with Insightful Questions but NO answers.
    * There are books of questions (no right or wrong) for awareness & conversation.
    * Do you keep test driving bicycles ??
    * Dive in like a Kamikaze ??
    * Nobody's perfect; and, THERE WILL BE ROOMMATE ISSUES.
    IT'S YOUR THING. GOOD LUCK FINDING MR. OR MS. GOOD BAR (see movie summary, Diane Keaton).
    Everybody is balancing short term & long term needs.

  • @Coco-qj1jc
    @Coco-qj1jc Місяць тому

    Apps are just made to make money, not to Meet people. Why, because lif you would meet someone directly, you wouldn’t use the app, se the ads, pay for premium features.

  • @foreignlovedreams
    @foreignlovedreams Рік тому +2

    Currently, online dating is typically the most popular way to meet your better half. With countless singles using some of the leading dating services to find their soulmates, we are no longer in the era where online dating was regarded as a no-go zone.
    Perhaps the reason for the acceptance and success of online dating is the increase in the number of dating sites and the advancement of the internet and technology.

  • @Deine_Omi
    @Deine_Omi 3 місяці тому

    „Finally someone said that“ ahh video

  • @kennyx8482
    @kennyx8482 2 місяці тому +1

    nice talk, but its nothing groundbreaking imho

  • @Deine_Omi
    @Deine_Omi 3 місяці тому

    Realy good video but I wish the light would be a little brighter 🎉😂

  • @coltonhughes4925
    @coltonhughes4925 3 місяці тому

    But yet. People are willing to pull their pants down over a celebrity they never met

  • @lukazi
    @lukazi 2 роки тому +4

    Good point, woman look for a man more attractive than themselves, that makes the dating market sucks for huge part of man

    • @RantKid
      @RantKid Рік тому +1

      Us guys don't do the same?

  • @iamanubhavdutta
    @iamanubhavdutta 7 місяців тому

    I came here looking for answers. Wanted to know how can we actually have a meaningful conversation which leads to in person meetup. But apparently the video was a waste of time

  •  2 роки тому +5

    Shallow thinking, picking out of context element to fit your point and not even trying to look at the big picture. There is more adhd because the definition of adhd itself changed. There is more non monogamie because it wasn't even a social option 50 years ago. Brushing off such important details aka context means you are just wasting my time.

  • @beauwagner7248
    @beauwagner7248 3 роки тому +10

    Just find a person in real life.

    • @sheiswhitney
      @sheiswhitney 2 роки тому +3

      I concur but, Real life is becoming crazy too. I'll just get a basenji.

    • @brentcastro10987
      @brentcastro10987 6 місяців тому

      Online dating apps just makes it easier to talk to people. People these days just don't know how to talk to people in person

  • @bucks1236
    @bucks1236 3 роки тому

    Swipe left

  • @yoginis100
    @yoginis100 2 роки тому +1

    Seems kind of basic

  • @takaetono6773
    @takaetono6773 8 місяців тому

    So...
    Everything is exactly the way, any reasonable and sane mind could figure out on itself after 5 minutes of online-dating.
    Cool.

  • @Kritikanbringer
    @Kritikanbringer Рік тому

    Time to unmatch TEDx Talks.

  • @BB-iw8sg
    @BB-iw8sg Рік тому +1

    So she completely stated the obvious, waste of my time

  • @jimmieedmonds8575
    @jimmieedmonds8575 Рік тому +1

    I have “never” made eye contact with someone and thought they were the love of my life!

  • @MageAwe-hl5zb
    @MageAwe-hl5zb 6 місяців тому

    Hello Hi

  • @Aname-hk4bu
    @Aname-hk4bu Рік тому

    Fake: internet is a chain connected to 0. I don’t authorize any of your usage.

  • @FreeforallPerez
    @FreeforallPerez Рік тому

    Astecas

  • @MageAwe-hl5zb
    @MageAwe-hl5zb 6 місяців тому

    I need good friend who love and believe jesus chrusty

  • @fabiosulpino2997
    @fabiosulpino2997 3 роки тому

    Jfs, , fabio,,paz, ,,que Deus lhe proteja,,

  • @vardaangaur8867
    @vardaangaur8867 3 роки тому +1

    Am i first

  • @kng_hrmn
    @kng_hrmn 3 роки тому +2

    It's a nice talk but her way of interpreting some studies was a disaster

    • @eclowe6594
      @eclowe6594 3 роки тому +1

      Right? And her thing about ADHD skyrocketing... We actually don't know that. We've really just recently gotten a good understanding of adhd and so while it may look like it's increasing it's also entirely possible we've just gotten much better at diagnosing it and fewer people with it are going undiagnosed as opposed to it's becoming more common. And the reality is likely somewhere in the middle.

    • @DesignTechnologyTV
      @DesignTechnologyTV 2 роки тому +2

      I disagree with you. Everything she said was right I wrote my dissertation using this talk. It's really accurate.

    • @Vivianaqt
      @Vivianaqt 2 роки тому

      @@DesignTechnologyTV I agree

  • @boatingisfunUK
    @boatingisfunUK 11 місяців тому +1

    Awful communication skills and voice

    • @Deine_Omi
      @Deine_Omi 3 місяці тому

      Your explanation was outstanding, with captivating language that made the content truly engaging. The choice of words was exceptional, adding a layer of excitement that kept the narrative compelling throughout. Excellent work, your professionalism and attention to detail are truly commendable.