3 Tips to Figure Out if You're Nonbinary |
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- Опубліковано 30 чер 2020
- 🏳️🌈FOLLOW ME on UA-cam🙌 @adesso.laurenzo
Are you Nonbinary? Let's find out! In this video, I offer three tips to help you figure this out :)
I get a ton of Instagram DMs from LGBTQ+ youth all over the world, & this UA-cam series is about answering the most common questions!
Today's question is: "Do you have any tips for figuring out if you're Nonbinary?"
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--------------------------------------------------------------- - Розваги
-non binary
-asexual
-aromantic
The no-trio
*high five* I'm aromantic, asexual and agender
adesso.laurenzo
Lol I can’t believe I couldn’t get this notification (I don’t check mails it’s like 10,000 at this point) but thx love youuu
We need a club jacket.
Or maybe a spade jacket 😉
I actually think I'm asexual, I'm non-binary, and I thought I was aromantic a couple months ago.
@@sage9653 I HAVE FINALLY FOUND ANOTHER ANGENDERRRRRRR TwT finnaly, umm anyways, sorry, just happy!
“ I love when people can’t tell if I’m a boy or girl “ can relate
same here!! I definitely go for a more androgynous or masculine style, so when people see me and don't know or assume boy, I get so happy and feel so validated, even if I can't always say so (public areas or when my unsupportive family is around) and especially for the latter, my family tries to correct them
Bro same lol
I relate to this so much 😭❤️
@@cloudeystella5857 to which comment, Peter D or adesso or The Bar or mine?
Can relate
when your native language doesn't have neutral pronouns:
*cries in portugese*
*complains in Polish*
i'm portuguese too, i know the pain😭🤚
O pior é shitposter fazendo piada com isso
@@Immmisu o pior mesmo é o pessoal do Twitter tentando forçar pronome neutro no português
“Eles” is an alternative pronoun because it’s gender neutral, but creating a third gender flexion is hard
My grandmother said to me at one point: “I have one wonderful granddaughter” to which I said “no.” I’ll carry on the conversation.
“Why ‘no’?”
“I’m not a granddaughter”
“Grandson?”
“No?”
“Grandchild”
“Yes”
That’s how I ended up coming out to my grandmother, it was such a weight off my shoulders even if no one else knows.
That is very wholesome
So wholesome 💛💜🖤
AAAAAAA I LOVE YOUR GRANDMA
I love your grandma and thats how im coming out
Aww! Your grandma is really sweet!!
I heard someone say:
“Cis people don’t spend hours agonizing over if they’re cis or not” and that’s something I use all the time
oh
this really made me feel valid thank you
Ohh, hehheheh. Weeelllll--
This is how I figured I was probably gay, as my little gay brain asked myself so many questions!
Ahh but sometimes I think I’m just overthinking it lol
the hardest part for me is figuring out if im non-binary, or if im just not comfortable with traditional femininity and gender roles
I have this problem too, I do prefer they/them pronouns tho, they feel less restrictive but in regards to gender idk if im a woman or nonbinary ughhhhh
(update) I discovered I'm actually a trans man
Hi! I was in the same boat. For most of my conscious life. I’m in my 40’s and just finally accepted last year I’m non-conforming/ non-binary.
I have a hard time fitting into societal expectations of women.
I’m married to a man & have two kids. But I’m not motherly in the traditional sense. I’m much more the garage/shop rat that would rather wear jeans or sweats than a pretty outfit most times. Then sometimes I like to dress “fem” and wear makeup. It changes like the weather.
Only recently have I become totally comfortable with my androgynous look. But I’m really happy.
When I finally expressed to my husband I’m non-binary I was relieved to have his full support. He knows absolutely nothing has changed. I’m still the same person he married. I’m still his “wife” (this term does not bother me). For me, pronouns are not real important. I’m comfortable enough with she/her that I don’t want to change that.
It was hard to finally work it though my head though. Def was a struggle.
My kids love that I’m into so many things outside of what I was taught were “my place”. We teach them to challenge the status quo and never let anyone define them, except them.
I can braid their hair, sew their clothes, fix the frigging car, and look bad ass the whole time. Screw the lipstick. Lol
Editing this to add- to A.M. (whoever you are) and anyone else who uses solely what I wrote above to determine if I “belong” in the non-binary category, just don’t. There is so much to me and what makes me who I am that I couldn’t write it all here. And I won’t. I was only showing support for the person I replied to and I am disgusted that someone even came at me like that. I’m not explaining anything to random trolls.
@@avim3120 omg thank you so much for this! i'm happy to see that you are able to be yourself and have a supportive partner too. you really comforted me in my confusion. i'll do some soul searching without giving myself time limits. again thank you so much i really enjoyed reading your comment. your kids will definitely grow up to be great people with a parent like you :)
@A. M. mmkay baby cakes I don’t need to defend who I am to you or anyone. I was only here to show support for the comment I replied to. You do not get to gatekeep on people.
I know who and what I am. And if you think you know so much about about me from ONE comment on ONE UA-cam video and want to be mad about it, die mad about it. I don’t have time for people like you that want to delegitimize people. I worked too damned hard to accept my self for who and what I am to let some rando internet troll to roll in and try to knock me down. Move on.
Editing for this point-
Btw- did you miss the part where non-binary people are not specifically any gender or one gender regardless of whether they were assigned it at birth or not?
Did you miss the part where I accepted I’m non-binary?
I’m not a woman setting myself apart from other women. I was assigned female at birth but do not identify as specifically female. So you point (or, rather troll) makes no sense.
Im a girl n i think that gender is a construction so fcuk it all n be yourself n do whatever u wanna do yay no need for labels
I mean, if I want a lower voice, want to have a top surgery, wear a binder often, hate the femininity that I associate with having periods, but don't feel like a man and don't like he/him pronouns but am delighted by they/them... how can people say I'm fucking faking it.
This^^^^^^^^^
Relate to all of this
can relate
I've never related to something more in my life, tyyyy
i relate but im also the person saying im faking it
The pain when you know youre non-binary but can't tell your parents or get a binder to see how it feels
Yeah that's pretty much me right now just found out I'm non binary and I want a binder but I'm not out to my mom and coming out to her feels mentally and emotionally draining to me
Same I feel the exact same way
Same I don’t know what I am but I’m not cis so probably non binary or trans. I’m so scared to come out because I will have to fight to be accepted and if I get it wrong my family will never understand or respect my identity and I’ll be stuck in the closet forever😢
Same! I want a bi- *cough* I NEED a binder but I think that my parents won't understand :(
Binders harm your body. Only a cult would tell you to harm your body.
to everyone who’s confused about their sexuality or gender identity don’t forget that it’s okay to be confused and it’s perfectly okay to experiment. stay strong! stay safe!
💕💫💙
Thanks
Ok to be confused? Young teenagers are already confused about so many things and you want to add MORE confusion to the mix?
Sandy Gonsalves of course it’s okay to be confused! Identifying and working through that confusion is simply how we learn more about ourselves. Stop acting like it’s some horrible thing to be confused, or not know, or not understand something about yourself. It’s just part of being human.
@@teriyaki_wings I'm not saying it's horrible to be confused, it's not. But I don't think the purpose is to cause MORE confusion, something that I think the non binary community has unintentionally have done.
The pain when my language doesn't have an equivalent term to “they” :(
Same tho
Germany is weird tbh
Dutch ppl have hen but most dont.wanna.use.it my.english class doesn't.want.to.use.they.pronouns.for.me
Same :(
Im arabic :'(
you could use neopronouns!
Omg saaaame!!!
anyways like i said gender is a social construct
at this point i just call myself a waffle
well, you're a very valid waffle! lol.
Pop off waffle
A very crisp and awesome waffle
Nah bruh gender is not a social construct it’s backed by science and biology. The gender stereotypes that are expected of men and women is a social construct. Pls don’t spread misinformation!
@@Lunalla and sorry for the rant but I just wanted to politely tell you that you are somewhat wrong, but you are right about stereotypes.
Me, who's native language has they/them: * happiness noises *
What is your native language?
Lol same
Same
Ego te exardescam sicut reiteratis, qua urebam anteacta vita mea.
for me i speak tagalog and it has the word sya. it refers to all genders and we dont use pronouns in tagalog its literally only sya which make me so happy
Just a announcement: CLOTHES AND MAKEUP HAVE NO GENDER SAME GOES WITH HAIR
Thank you so much this helps so much you dont understand, every video I watch keeps saying it defines your gender and it makes me so confused
Ikr
Fair, but I'm still going to chop it all off.
THANK YOU
Thank you, I have been thinking of cutting my hair to make it less girly but I kind of like it Long so this kind of helped me decide not to tell my mom to make an appointment :D
This was helpful, I'm gonna go back now **walks into closet**
How is this so relatable.
I'm spending a lot of time in my literal closet-
I stay in my closet when I cry and it's great
My closet is literally where I’m always at, It’s just comfortable here TvT
No ya gotta be ✨extra✨ moonwalk into the closet
press y to same
I’m experimenting with she/they, and it feels honestly quite natural for me
I have a question. I don't mind what people assume of my gender, but I don't like when people automatically assume I'm a girl. Even online... so.. *sorry if this is not a very good question, I'm not very good at asking*
@Emily uwu omg same here finally someone who relates to me
I feel like im just labeling myself.... and I am not enjoying this :\
anybody here have any advice for this
@Emily uwu omg sameee
Are you a boy? And just figuring out about non-binary and experimenting like I am
@Emily uwu sameee. I'm also using she/they pronouns- And I also have this like- feeling I'm "faking it" even tho I'm not rlly. Like I feel like I'm just labeling myself basically TvT. I haven't told anyone yet either. Like I feel more more feminine than masculine (that felt weird to type for some reason lol) but still enough that I'm questioning my gender and such- Ree- Any advice?
A major sign that I was enby is the thing where I stare at myself in the mirror and dissociate while thinking about how the thing I’m seeing isn’t really me
...wait
Oh I thought that was just me…
Yeah I wish my body looked like how I feel
WAIT WHAT
@@vanilla6989 yea who does not
Me: has been doubting my gender identity for years, done tons and tons of research and has chest dysphoria
Also me: idk man might be faking it 🤔
Honestly mood
That’s literally me though. I’m watching this video because I’m thinking “you’re probably not non binary you just *want* to be so you’re faking it” even though I identify as non binary and hate when people use she/her pronouns and all the other non binary stuff. I’m definitely nb.
@@snowinthesummertimed9269 same
My brain is over here like you just wanna be different and special this is all fake you dont actually feel this way, then I get misgendered or take a good look at my own body and I'm like oh right that's why. And then an hour later it's like "you just forced yourself to feel that way because you want to" and it's a cycle 😔
Same
I'm nonbinary but like wearing makeup because it's pretty.
you can be non binary and wear makeup:))
@@kayypaidfr yay ^^
Same i dont like a lot of make up just decent like eyeliner and stuff
So your a femenime non binary :>
you're nonbinary *AND* like wearing makeup because it's pretty ^^
when i tell myself im a girl, i feel alright, when i tell myself im a boy, i feel alright. im just really confused on my identity lollll
edit: nvm i’m non binary trans masc ⟟ think
Are u a girl or a boy?
@@piperhh5609 neither. ⟟ am 14 rats stacked in ⏃ trench coat.
@@ppunz oh. But we’re you born a girl or a boy? Or are u trans?
Ender language poggg
i know what non binary means but what does non binary trans masc mean? (to clear the air im genuinely asking since im questioning my gender and idkk ahhhh)
when I first started to question my gender identity, I always thought I was just faking it cuz sometimes I would be uncomfortable with she/her and women's bathrooms and sometimes I would be completely fine
and then I heard of genderfluidity! it made me so comfortable, I'm not wondering if I'm faking anything or unsure anymore and I can just be whomever i want, whenever i want!
At the moment i feel so unvalid and feel like i'm faking it. Because in the last days i was Very comfortable being a girl. I just think i'm faking it. Even though the days before i really had bad dysphoria. And it sucks. Because it's kinda like there's no day where i feel comfortable. I don't know how to accept my feminine side. Do you have any Tips?
P. S. I'm Sorry for the long Text XD
@@littlecousin8716 while I'd like to give you some foolproof answer, I don't actually have one. its not really a "tips and tricks" kind of problem, yknow? So it's a pretty complicated and long answer, I hope you don't mind; I'll include a TL:DR at the end, and feel free to ask for clarification on anything lol
there were several factors that played a part into me accepting my feminine side. The biggest part was not actively rejecting it. I realized that I actually really loved things I'd said I hated and dubbed as feminine before. I'd kinda shunned them all my life because I didn't want to seem feminine and make other people think I was faking it. I was super worried about what other people would think, if someone who "supposedly" wasn't a girl started loving pink, yknow?
that leads me to my second biggest reason: my brother. He's transgender, and has been a super big influence on my life. I only knew that genderfluid was a thing because of him lol. But even as a guy, he loves some feminine things, and one thing he said stuck out to me: "It's great confusing people, being a transgender guy in touch with my feminine side."
so my honest answer?
Spite and chaos were my biggest helpers in accepting my femininity. Yes, it's annoying at times, having to correct people all the time. But being able to say "fuck those shits" about the transphobes who don't accept me and set expectations for who they think I am is worth it.
I'm not a person who'll just say "don't care about other people's opinions" and shit, cuz it's kind of impossible for the average person. Humans are social creatures, we crave validation. But you have to learn to pick and choose which opinions to care about. I have my brother, my partner,, and my friends who support me and validate me, so those are the opinions I care about.
But I don't know how your life works and how many people you know of who are supporting you. But even just having one can change how the world works for you.
But basically, confidence and self-assurance are key. but those come from acceptance of yourself, right? they build like a corkscrew, slowly helping each other grow. but you just gotta give it a starting point, be it even spite :)
TL:DR: don't actively reject your feminine side by thinking you're faking it. you are you, and you're whoever you want to be. don't let anyone tell you otherwise. and mainly, find a starting point, be it accepting one small thing you thought was feminine and owning it as male or nonbinary, or just wanting to spite those dumbass transphobes. it's different for everyone, but you got this :)
@@bumblebeagan thank you so much for your loving reply. Even though i know that the acceptance have to come from myself your understanding and everything you wrote helped me. Thank you ^^
@@littlecousin8716 of course! I'm super glad I can help, and i hope you can reach the level of acceptance you want ^-^
You can trick yourself to believe anything. Seek sex-affirming psychotherapy
and to all the enby's reading the comment section , u r valid and loved and accepted
Thankyou 😘💖💖💕
May I ask what that is? An enby..
@Mr Lopez Here's the attention you ordered, sorry if it's a little cold, would you like me to bring it back to the chef?
@Mr Lopez ah, sorry sir we're no longer serving upsetty spaghetti, but we appreciate your patronage
@Mr Lopez ah you know, as much as I like banter it really isnt the most productive way of talking to people believe things like "being nonbinary is attention-seeky". Do you feel like gender identity correlates to being narcissistic? If so, why?
Me: trying to think back to when I was young
My childhood trauma leading to my current depression: N O . Y O U C A N' T R E M E M B E R .
Yep me too
same
Same
Omg meeee
Oh...hope you're okay
I’m honestly having a lot of trouble with my gender and sexuality. When it comes gender I was born biologically a female but frequently feel uncomfortable when people use she and her for me, it just doesn’t feel right. But then again I feel comfortable in female bathrooms as well as boys. I have female and male friends and feel comfortable with both genders
Maybe you could be bigender? In case you don’t know what that is it’s when you feel two genders at the same time!
Same!
I have more male friends than female. I hangout with them more often. But my gender is still a female.
The gender of your friends doesn't mean anything. I have an equal amount of girl and boy friends
Nevermind, I'm probably a bad example
PE teacher:
“Girls on one side boys on the other”
Me who wants to come out as pan/bi and non-binary but has a transphobic mother: 😃 where do I go?
My Pe teacher assuming my gender: right side with the *other* girls
Me angry he assumed my gender and wishes to be back in primary school with my two lesbian teachers who were the best teachers ever:
👁💧👄👁💧👌🏻
It's not too difficult. Most of society still uses sex and gender to mean the same thing. If it's "girls one side and boys the other", take it to mean "females one side and males the other", that's what the teacher really means.
You are delusional
@ᚱᚢᚾᛖ No just call them what they are.
@@Envision_ which person are you talking to?
@ᚱᚢᚾᛖ it's fine mate. I'm a female and I'm totally fine being called "he". Infact, many people has called me "he" on online voice calls because I sounds like a boy when I'm tired. It's not a big deal really. And obviously my preferences is "she".
I’m sick of hearing “what gender are you today?” That’s gender fluid not non binary 🤦♀️
that falls under non binary, and also let ppl identify how they wanna identify, they’re probs using that term bc it feels more comfortable
As the person above said it falls under non binary. Non binary means not apart of the binary man and woman gender system. Genderdluid falls under that because its not binary, geddit? Agender also falls under enby because that lack of gender, which is not on the binary.
i thought they were the same thing
@Bruno Wentworth you gonna argue with inarguable science and facts? Go right ahead 😂
@Bruno Wentworth lol friend the fact that you said "binary sexuality" shows me that you have no clue what you're talking about. And the fact that you came onto a video about being non-binary to place this opinion in the comments tells me a lottttt about you, more than I need to know. Any who, I hope you go and research the difference between sex, gender and sexuality ok, its ok to educate yourself. Have a nice day!
i came out to my mom last night by accident
(i tried to ask my mom to buy a binder and play it off as a sports bra but she scrolled up and saw it was a binder and shhsjsjsks)
dont worry tho, shes supportive,
thank you for making these videos 🥺🥺
gay boi my friend is going to try get me a binder for my birthday, I still don’t know how I’ll be able to wash it without people finding out, because I’m never left home alone. When my parents usually leave the house, my older sister stays home to take care of my younger sister. The closest to alone I will be is when my older sister is at work, so I have to take care of my younger sister. With that I can tell her to play on her iPad upstairs, but I barley even know how to hand wash things, and it also depends on how long my parents are out for.
Oak Twig You could go to the bathroom and wash it there, it won't be as clean as it would be if you washed it properly but it's better than nothing. Or you could go to a supportive friends house yo wash it :)
Oak Twig you could hide it in a shirt or a pair of pants, or do the sink thing walker suggested :>
gay boi and Walker#599'46 thank you so much for the helpful tips! I’ll be sure to keep them in mind!
@@oaktwig6413 no problem :) Hope your transition goes well :))))
*out of character*
My teacher: Alright, boys vs girls!
Me, a questioning nonbinary: *yeah, about that.,*
*haha-*
i am non-binary and i am fine being called he/him, she/her and they/them or any other respectful pronouns, i just go with the flow
I think an important thing to remember is that there’s a difference between wanting to dress androgynously because you know it will make people see you as non-binary/the gender you weren’t assigned at birth, and wanting to dress androgynously because that’s just the style of clothing you like. I feel like it’s common among enbies to like dressing androgynously because of how it makes people see us, but also be afraid to dress in a more commonly feminine/masculine way because what if that means we’re not non-binary? Shouldn’t I want to dress andro all the time? No! Guess what, it’s totally fine for enbies to enjoy any style of clothing (because clothes don’t have gender) AND at the same time acknowledge that androgynous clothing makes you feel good because you know it may affect how people see you and think of you.
For example, I personally love dresses and how it feels physically to wear them, but sometimes wearing one in public can make me feel dysphoric because I feel like it makes people see me and think of me as a girl. THAT’S what I’m not entirely comfortable with. It’s not the dress, it’s the way people needlessly gender clothes. **eye roll** As a result, I mostly wear androgynous clothes now a days, BUT I also wear them because I DO like them (I kinda like all styles of clothing lol). My point is, don’t let gender-roles stop you from wearing the clothes you like and looking cool as heck, whatever that means for you personally! Stay strong non-binary squad
Thank you so much! 💜 I feel the same way, I have 2 dresses because I like how they look but I rarely use them because I don’t want people to see me like that . More recently I started to use them more around my friends and is nice when I feel comfortable.
Thank you! Some styles that I wear are more masculine and most are more feminine, but of course that is only to society. I want to be able to dress how I want
@@Abel-lt5nr I relate so much to that! I really want to experiment more both with clothes that are masculine and feminine, but I usually just end up wearing a somewhat andro t-shirt or sweater ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
@@glen2764 I feel the same! The easiest thing would maybe be to just stop caring what everyone thinks of you and wear whatever, but unfortunately it's hard to not care, especially when you feel like most people don't even know that your identity exists..
Page Acutually turns out I’m gender fluid. I kinda switch around every day and sometimes i change every half a day. Like yesterday I felt most comfortable with non-binary for half the day then the other half more as a Dani girl kinda gender. Today I’m feeling more masculine. And my presentation changes day to day because of this. It would explain why every day felt kinda different gender wise. The most common spot for me is the non-binary and off the spectrum.
Swedish has a word like “he” (han) or her” (hon) for people that are non binary; “hen”.
squawk squawk
im sorry if this is rude
@@metra8604 pfft 💀
I identify as a h e n
my pronouns in swedish are h e n
To the chicken coop we go!
My school: boys and girls do pe different
My non-binary friend: *panik*
Just don’t do pe since apparently nb ppl don’t do sports lmao
@@itsyaboichilde5397 In many schools gym is mandatory :(
Thanks for letting me know im non-binary
**Moonwalks back into**
**✨The closet✨**
i was born a girl, but being a guy doesn’t feel right, neither does being a girl
edit: nvm i’d rather be a guy than a girl
edit: STILL NON-BINARY I THINK JDBFJFBFNB
edit: 🧍 777 likes/ why do i keep seeing 7’s around
How I feel.
Jaden :•)!! were not alone, i hope ur okay!!
Same ^^
same, but parents are scary, and don't like that one of my friends are LGBTQIA+, little do they know I have a girlfriend
same. help meeeee!!!!!!!!
i go by they/them pronouns online and with close friends and a few days ago, my family kept on calling me young lady, girl, and princess. i felt very uncomfortable, does that have any meaning?
TrashCosplayz_ Alex I feel the same way I’ve always wanted nothing to do with being a girl. And in the past week I was working with my friend cleaning a house and the people there kept referring to me/us as “the lady’s” “girls” and it made me feel extremely uncomfortable... I rlly wanted to tell him that that upset me but I’m too scared. To be honest it made me feel a little bit better when I saw ur comment cuz I feel the same way and I feel like I shouldn’t.
if you feel uncomfortable, tell them! give your name/pronouns! they are also welcome to ask (as I would to most people) but if they can't see how uncomfortable you are, inform them
I feel the same way. But luckily im not 'princess' or something like that im a savage monkey. Yeah ive been called a monkey my my parents my whole life so i dont have that problem. Its mostly with teachers because i feel uncomfortable both being called 'young lady' but also telling them im non-binary or my pronouns
Yeah. I put my hair in space buns and my grandparents came over. I've never really disliked being feminine, but being called girl and she.. It just makes me uncomfortable. I don't know how to feel honestly. I also have this fear that if I experiment then people will think I'm attention seeking.. But I feel so uncomfortable.
Abby Can't Even “I also have this fear that if i experiment then people will think i’m attention seeking”
i cannot describe how much i relate to that, i also feel like i don’t have a valid reason. but i’m afraid of going by they/them because i feel like people will think i’m just trying to fit in or look unique or something when it just doesn’t feel right when i get called she/her
My mom just walked in on me watching this and I haven’t told her yet I’m so happy that I’m able to come up with believable lies on the spot 😓
"Try really, really hard to just be as authentic to yourself as much as you're able to" ♡
If you menstruate, your authentic self is she
I think I may be non-binary but I’m scared it’s just a phase. 😅
Mosca Reus yeah, you don’t get to tell people how to feel or identify.
@@Mosk314 There's a difference between being a feminine male and a masculine female, and actually feeling as if you're the wrong gender.
@Mosca Reus Wtf if you are going to type something type it well
Mosca Reus actually (and sorry if I sound snarky) gender has nothing to do with organs, chromosomes, or genitalia. A lot of people confuse sex and gender (very understandable) so here you go:
Sex - the chromosomes, organs, and genitalia
Gender - the identity
It’s easy to mix them up so no worries about that. Non binary actually does exist and it’s really interesting! Look into articles by people like the Mayo Clinic and national LGBTQ organizations. Those aren’t the only two options those are just to start. Also you will be interested to find that cases of non binary people date back to the native Americans, even earlier probably! Look it up (and use reliable sources). I can (almost) guarantee that you will be fascinated with what you find. Please do try to change your mind on the subject. It can be hard to understand how somebody could not feel like either sex because it doesn’t feel normal but if you also look into how history has normalized heterosexuality and cisgender people, while denormalizing homosexuality and transgender people. There is a lot more LGBT history out there then you would think. Have a nice day and do please try to change your mind!
Also wanted to add, don’t be scared. You’re allowed to try out different identities, pronouns and clothes to find what works best for you. And you don’t even have to label your feelings if you don’t want to or if it doesn’t make you comfortable, plenty of people don’t and that’s perfectly okay. Experimenting doesn’t make you any less valid.
When you italian, and people aren’t used to say “Loro/essi” (they/ them in Italian).
*P A I N*
felt 💔
Non sono non-binary però posso capire😔
if this makes you feel any better, loro in spanish means parrot. your pronouns are parrots(?
in spanish nobody uses "elle" 😞
@@bruneperillo2247 okay this made me feel better, thanks
P.E Teacher:So,Boys on this side,And you girls, on this side-
Me:Ofc...i guess i"ll just sit on the bench like a 60 y/o having back pains-
I'm 30 and from a small town in indiana. I've been struggling with this since I can remember. Thanks for the advice, yo. For real.
I was born female and I'm still closeted. Being born into a very Christian "God says wear skirts! You are gonna marry a manly man!" household means my parents have always made me have very long hair and NEVER allowed me to wear pants. I feel gender disphoryia very strongly and am afraid to come out. I don't know if my friends will accept me, or even my family. I don't know if I will ever be able to start binding or get a hair cut while still a minor. But these videos make me feel safe, included, and valid, so thank you. ❤️❤️❤️
Lola G get off tumblr please.
Fish stew rude
【Artistry】 get off tumblr please.
@@fishstew2573 I'm off of Tumblr while talking to you. Stop being rude. Lola is a valid human being.
M NG valid is an idiotic term and lola is just a gender nonconforming female. just because she isn't hyper feminine doesn't mean she's an imaginary third gender. get off tumblr, it's a cesspool.
That moment when u are German and Germany doesnt have they/them as pronouns: 😃👍✨
What about Mann or Ess?
@@renameagain5808 those more translate to "it", animals and object are referred to that way. Unfortunately not really an option in German
@@reginakneip8858 oh, ok. That sucks
what a pain
For once Germany is handling minorities right 😂😂😂😂
I need some advice, so I've been thinking I might be non binary for a while now. I'm biologically female and use she/her pronouns right now. 3 things that made me question this is recently I started to hate how I looked with long hair so much that I got my mom to cut it short one day and I feel alot more comfortable with it like this, the second thing is when people say "you're a pretty young woman" or "that's not very ladylike". I dont want to be lumped in with females, but at the same time I have no problem with my given name. My pronouns however I've been thinking of going by she/they, because using they/them exclusively just didnt feel right to me but neither does she/her. And the third thing is my breasts. My breasts are naturally quite large, so if I'm wearing something like a tshirt it's easy to see I'm a female. So alot of the time I wear baggy hoodies, I really want to get a binder to try that out but I'm scared of my parents finding out because idk if they'll accept me. Does anyone who is non binary or if you have knowledge on the subject please help me out? 😅
I feel the same way. I feel non-binary but I still like my birth name and idk if that happens for a lot of people? But a thing that helped me is what are the pronouns you refer to yourself in your head while questioning your gender? Could be a weird indicator idk but it helped me :) also ur probly past this as this comment was 9 months ago but aanyways
You're probably a demigirl
I identify as NonBinary , the problems I've had was I was born a female, I actually hit puberty at a young age. Lately I have found interest in wearing makeup but because of the gender stereotypes forced into my mind it made me think over my identification. I have shortish hair but the one thing making me feel comfortable lately is baggy clothes that you wouldn't necessarily see on a girl because I'm lucky enough to only have older brothers. I don't really live in a supportive household especially when I said I find attraction to females and males, I do not know if I like others because I have not come in contact with one. Anyways the fact of who I was attracted to didnt fall well. I just wanted to get that out.
I relate to this a lot. i think i have gender dysphoria because ive always disliked having a feminine body and want to be more andro, but at the same time i like femme clothes and fasion. i know clothes dont have a gender, but it still makes me question and overthink myself.
Guys wear makeup too
You are a woman.
I never feel comfortable when my parents say “Your a girl so you have to shave, shower everyday, look like a girl, etc”
You don't shower every day?
@@shivamsrivastava6312 No
@@shivamsrivastava6312 i know this dude and he showers once a week with soap and inbetween only casually to freshen up in the summer if he feels like it and he smells fine but idk. also there are some skin experts who say it may be harmful to shower daily unless you do hard labour daily/sweat more than average
im a girl i never shaved cuz i wear something that doesnt show much skin👽🥰
I hate it
You lost me at talk to close people, I have no one 😼
same :(
Re-late-a-ble.
I'll be your buddy!!
I'm on insta as Frost.Bytten. we can talk there if y'all want to. 🏳️🌈
Hi I'm Aaron I've adopted you feel free to message me via Facebook ( see UA-cam user name)
I like Femme-leaning clothing styles like vintage stuff, but cutting my hair recently and considering a breast reduction once I've lost some weight really feels like ME
I only came out as Bi last year, but I'm Demi, too so yay demis
I think of myself as gender fluid because the thought of being a girl is ok, but I don’t specifically feel like my brain is a girl. If someone called me a boy I would be happy even though I don’t feel like my brain is a boy either. Yet I don’t feel like non binary either, because I still feel like more of a girl then a boy. But I feel more masculine then feminine sometimes (and the opposite way around too) I still don’t know tho-
I feel not comfortable with he/him
And actually I despise that pronoun used for me-
But I slowly don't feel comfortable with she/her either
I don't feel anything about she/they and they/them kinda don't fit in...
I feel like I MUST be a girl but I also feel like I shouldn't and I also feel like I am too "feminine" for non-binary and like I'm faking it.
I am a wrecking mess...
@@user-kt1sn6bj7h actually tho same it’s a problem haha…
@@Grace-ce2px ikrr I have made some progress and I'm currently identifying as a non-binary with pronouns she/her,they/them (it's both of them that I feel most comfortable with rn, and currently I identify as they/them) and I feel like that but let's just say I'm still a wrecking mess
Can absolutely relate 😅
This is similar to how I feel! Glad I'm not alone!! =)
"gender dysphoria is when u feel urghh-" - Lorenzo 2020
Me: haha i love wearing this tight sports bra
Also me: haha i love short hair
Also me: haha i love boy shorts and socks and only wear black
Random person: " *he* "
Me: ...no...
Me: i love cute skirt and thigh highs and cute Sailor Moon shirt
Person: " *she* "
Me: ...no...
Person: "t h e h e l l a r e y o u t h e n?"
Me: a p e r s o n
@Glenn heterophobia isn’t a thing??? the person isn’t exactly a great person considering they assumed op’s gender and gender things that’s shouldn’t be gendered? also this is a joke chill
@Glenn no... It's completely fine to correct someone on your pronouns and name, and it shows that you have respect for yourself. If someone gets mad at that than they might be transphobic:/
@@Torera216 I think you misunderstood, their talking about how since they do this stuff people gender them.
@@Torera216 that's not what they're saying 💀
They're saying that because they do these things, others assume that they are a certain gender or go by certain pronouns when that's not the case and regardless of hoe they dress or what they like they're non binary
What the person was saying was quite literally the opposite of sexism and was opposing stereotypes
Fashion style doesn't equal gender
I know that I’m not non-binary myself, but I love that the school social worker changed the old teacher bathroom to a gender neutral bathroom, and now she’s my favorite person out of the whole school.
My mother said ‘be patient, girl.’ I wasn’t sure how to feel about that. I didn’t really like it, and now I’m having a gender identity crisis
i’m trying to figure it if i’m non-binary cause i hate being referred to as she/her or girl or anything like that. but i feel comfortable using they/them pronouns and being referred to with gender neutral terms. but i don’t really mind my body but i wouldn’t be mad if i had a guys body?
YOU JUST DESCRIBED WHATS BEEN HAPPENING TO ME. I’m so glad I’m not alone, don’t worry we can figure this out, we got this :)
thats literally me..
Yeah that sounds like you’re non-binary. You probably have social (gender) dysphoria but not body dysphoria. I think that’s totally a thing that some enbies experience. You don’t have to have every type of dysphoria to be non-binary.
I read something that I think is pretty smart, regarding not having physical dysphoria. It went along the lines of: You don't have to suffer for your identity to be valid, suffering is not a requirement for any gender.
Also if you consider that waking up as the opposite sex is some serious body horror to most cis people, it is pretty safe to say that being ok with the idea of having the opposite sex tomorrow is not exactly a cis thing.
@@creativedesignation7880 Yeah my main thing was that I never had dysphoria, but I’ve definitely had gender euphoria when I tried on more masculine clothes (there was this jacket in particular that had this perfect mix of masculine and feminine energy and made me cry lmao), and when I think about it I’m fine with both she and they pronouns, but also fae pronouns make me happy. And the idea of someone mistaking me for a guy makes me super happy but I don’t want to be a guy lmao. And now that I’m reading this, I know I’m not cis for sure, I just think I never knew there were other options besides being binary trans. I didn’t realize it was normal to be so firmly convinced of what your gender was like cis people apparently are, which made me sure.
So I'm demigender. So I feel basically half female. Some days I'm happy with being female, and I'm happy with my body (Ex: feeling like I can wear a bra instead of a binder and being okay with my genitalia) Other days I don't feel happy with my body, I feel like I need a binder but I also am happy with my female genitals. So I never feel male, I just feel half female. I feel like demigender is such a misunderstood topic and I would love for someone to talk about it
@Gay Fem Boy UwU I just kinda didn't feel fully female. But I also didn't feel fully non-binary. I guess it kinda felt like something was.. missing-?
i identify as a demigirl and i wish more people talked about demigender
@@sallysoniclover yeah same
I feel like I’m demigender because I feel more female than non binary but more non binary than female and it’s like ughhh. On a spectrum I feel in between nonbinary and female. She/they seems to fit me really well
I'm a demiwoman and not out. Feels like too much to explain to people
I identify as non binary. I felt uncomfortable in my own body for most of my life. I struggled with my sexuality, I was asexual for two years and bisexual till now. I’ve realised that I might identify as non binary when I stopped having my period half a year ago due to some health issues I have. And now when I’m living over a half year without having to deal with that, I’ve finally accepted it and realised to just simply go with how I truly feel. I’ve cut my hair short, tried out some style of clothing that I would feel comfortable in and I feel some kind of relief. The only thing that I’m terrified of is the fact that my period might come back. I always hated my period since I had always some kind of issues with it and I really don’t want it to come back. I am actually thinking of getting a surgery so I don’t ever get pregnant or have to deal with menstruation again. I’m twenty now and I’ve decided that I don’t want to give birth and if I decide that I want to have children I want to adopt one, since I myself am adopted. I still am struggling with what I’m gonna do, so if any of you have some tips, encouragement or ideas, please feel free to comment.
i'm trying out going by she/they nd it's the first time i feel most than comfy w my pronouns but at the same time i feel like i invalidate myself so much out of fear, like what if i'm faking the sensation or what if i'm doing this for attention? i scare myself nd i force myself to not feel right w my current pronouns nd it's getting harder :( i also im so scared on what my close circle will say ...
this is exactly how i feel :/
SAMEEE
@@clawdz.7879 hi sweetie ! i'm sorry you have been going trough the same :/ i know how hard it gets but since i've wrote that i started to be nicer to myself nd accept the fact that the pronouns make me very happy, little by little. we sometimes have up and downs but i just want u to know that u and ur pronouns are very valid !!!! and very pretty !!! i recommend u to compliment urself using both pronouns and to remember yourself that you are using them because it makes you feel safe and comfy. they are there for you, not for anyone else, so as long as they make YOU happy nd good then it's all alright !
@@nerdemojireal you nd your pronouns are very valid nd beautiful ! remember that
I feel the exact same way you explained it in the same words I would say Thankyou for someone that feels like me. I’ve been thinking if I’m non-binary and She/They
You can tell im a girl, but for some reason i just feel comfortable being identified as non-binary, but im still experimenting and trying to figure out who i am 😊
(im just too scared to come out to my parents because they think that non-binary isnt real but i hope one day i can come out to them and maybe explain to them why their wrong-)
me too!! i’m scared that if i came out with my mom she’ll just be like “but you’re so feminine”
I’m scared to come out to my family since they are transphobic.
Me too. I don't fell like i identify as a boy but i don't really identify as a girl either
I feel bad for you but I can relate exept it's when I told my dad I was lesbian but I'm still trying to prove him wrong I hope you all have an awesome day and I wish you luck coming out :3
My parents are homophobic...
I choose to come out in college where I actually become an adult
The gays can really sense when there's another gay nearby. I got this weird vibe from someone at the boardwalk (this was in 2019 ) and she saw me staring at her. She said "youre my friend now" and we exchanged numbers. She is a lesbian, and im questioning my gender and know my sexual and romantic orientations.
I remember watching this video last year, questioning my gender and crying over the confusion. Your videos helped me a lot. A year has passed and turns out I'm a demiboy/transmasc. This video helped me learn I'm not cis
I'm a girl at birth, I suffer from OCD but only the thought of being called "man" or "he/him" makes me feel so much pain and being called girl or woman makes me feel Happy. So thank you so much, I'm CIS as Always thought (the bully ocd wants to make me feel the opposite Way)
When your parent does a good job explaining gender identity’s /sexuality’s
I always knew I was androgynous because I didn't care what I wore, mens or woman's, but as soon as I hit 12-13 I felt really uncomfortable with my chest and I hated my long hair because it was a "girly thing". Then one day I was watching a video on youtube and 'nonbinary' was mentioned. I didn't know what it ment so I googled it, and everything it listed related to me: I hated the seperation of girls and boys because I didn't feel comfortable in either, I had some dysphoria in my chest and my hair, I kinda hurt inside when I was called a girl or she/her, I wanted to be androgynous, but was kinda scared to look that way. So I tried everything in my power to look more fem. I wore heavy makeup, girly clothes, wedges, jewlery, I used girly school supplies, etc. It got so bad to the point where I wouldn't leave the house without a full face of makeup. Then quarantine hit. And I looked more into nonbinary and what it ment. I was home all day so I tried out different looks. I would wear more masc clothes I had, I put my hair in a ponytail and flipped it and put a hat on so my hair looked short, etc. I felt more cofterable with they/them pronouns but I told nobody because I was scared. So I lied to my parents and said I wanted my hair short because I didn't want to brush it. So I got it cut super short, and shaved one side of my head. I felt almost ok. The only thing was my chest. I would wear a oversized jacket everyday to hide it. Now I wear less makeup, I wear a mix of fem and masc clothes, and try different looks. I am out as Nonbinary to my dad, but he says 'I will always be a girl in his eyes' so it's like a hit to the heart, and my friends know, but they still call me she/her. I still have dysphoria in my chest, but I suffer through it because I haven't told my mom because I am scared too. Sorry for the super long comment, but I just had to get it all out there.
So sorry that your dad and friends haven't accepted your gender identity, hopefully they do in the future. Dysphoria sucks, maybe you could try a binder in the future?
I came out to my mom as non-binary she thought i just wanted to be a tomboy i told her my pronouns they/them she still uses she/her
Don't worry about it being kinda long. We all need to vent somewhere. I have gone through a lot of the stuff you were describing in the beginning, and I think I'm non-binary but I don't think my parents will react well. I hope that when you do tell your mom, everything goes well. Good luck!
i dont feel good about my chest or my long hair, so i get a bun and try to ignore the chest.. im not sure if im trans or non binary tho but i have a strong connection to non binary!
ps. i havent came out yet because im kinda scared how my mom will react
just never forget that no breasts at all is a boy thing...so you gotta have middle ground to be truly androgynous......or at least recognize that some enby people would be fine with breasts
is it weird that i got so excited watching this video? it’s like i’m finally starting to figure out/understand myself again. thank you so much!
Same
My non binary story:
I was born a female in Dec 4 but 10 years later (I'm now 16) I heard someone in my school talking about non binary and I got really
interested in it so I experimented with he/him and that didn't work out so I experimented with he/them didn't work out so I tried they/them and IM SO PROUD OF MYSELF! it means so much to be in the LGBTQ+ community and to be who I am ! if any questions about non binary life pls let me know :)
So your a girl that just became non binary because it sounded cool?
@@Blue_cheese.No
What makes you non-female?
@@Blue_cheese.Yep, that’s exactly what it sounds like. Just proves how much of a fad this is 😂
Me: wants to claw off my chesticles
Me: loathes she/her pronouns used in relation to me with a passion
Me: hated my birth name since I was young
Me: Feels better being seen as masculine
Me: has been thinking I was some type of trans for over a year
Me: wanted to be a "tomboy" since I was like 7 even though I didn't display any tomboyish traits
Me: Started hating my body when I started hitting puberty
Me: feels uncomfortable in gendered spaces
Also me: but I mIGHT BE FAKING ITTT!!!!
Because you are, it is called internalized misogyne girl
@@czerkitka141 what??
@@czerkitka141 wanting to cut of your chest, socially transition and use non she/her pronouns is not internalised misogyny, they are most likely trans or nonbinary
Tomboy doesn't mean you're not feminine at all or you're not a girl. I'm a tomboy, but I'm still girl, attracted to man, quite feminine, etc. Male and female's brain are made different. You can't erase feminine inside your brain.
A UA-camr I like watching "one topic at a time," once said "if you think you're it you aren't" and I repeat that to myself especially on bad days
I’ve been really confused since middle school, since the age of 10 I would like wearing guy clothes and putting my hair in a beanie to make it look short but I also enjoy wearing cute girl clothes . Ever since then I’ve been wanting to cut my hair and be more gender neutral but idk if I’m genderfluid or non-binary , I’m fine with any pronouns I wouldn’t mind if anyone called me ma’am or sir . I’m really confused :\ could I be non binary even if I look more like a girl ?
Edit: hi it’s been a few weeks and I now identify as non binary and I think this is the best for me and rlly fits. Thanks to everyone who tried to help
you could totally be non binary if you look more feminine!! you dont have to dress or look androgynous to be an enby
No that’s just you being you
Reddit Egg they could be non binary. Gender expression ≠ gender identity. For example, a born-male who identifies as a male wearing feminine clothing doesn’t make him a girl, it just makes him a man who likes feminine clothing.
Wabi-sabi recently I’ve been going by as non-binary and so far I think it fits
You *could* be. But it's not cut and dry. Reality is, the only person that can tell you is yourself (after long hours of soul searching and reseaech)
I feel so better knowing this! ⚫🟣⚪🟡
Thank you for talking this out. I felt the same way my whole life.
Actually I'm really questioning if I'm comfortable with my gender or not. I've always been proud of being a girl and I never even questioned that...
During quarantine I cut my hair from really long (it was 90cm) to really short (shaved most of it off). And it feels wonderful.
My dilemma started about a week ago. In my literature finale the two testers that were there accidentally misgendered me.
(I'm sure that if the called me he on purpose it was because they thought that I was trans or something and tried to be respectful because they saw my ID)
I immediately corrected them but for some reason it made me feel kind of happy and excited that they thought I was a boy and I don't really know how to explain it and I've been thinking about this all week and I'm really confused now...
I mean, it's not that in not comfortable with being a girl, but I'm starting to feel like I don't really need a gender identity and it's confusing me...
I found a tiktok of yours that's talking about this so I decided to come here and see this video, maybe it would help me a bit...
(I'm writing this before watching)
Thomas Korn wtf
access what is so difficult to understand? "Non-binary " is nothing but a fad
Thomas Korn
Um no it’s not, stop being disrespectful
PrincessDaisyLust no it actually means that you cut your hair shorter
PrincessDaisyLust nah
i am struggling so much. i don’t know my identity or sexuality anymore. i was so sure i was a girl and bisexual but now i just know i like girl and maybe boys and i know that i am not a boy but i also don’t feel like a girl anymore. I also don’t like the non binary pronouns in german
Same here
maybe just say youre questioning. I know it can be hard sometimes. Ive been struggling too, but the most important thing to know is that you dont have to know yet. It takes a bit. (:
I don’t know German and what pronouns there are but there are more pronouns (in english anyways) than she/her, he/him and they/them. I’m not sure what they are but maybe you could look into that and see if they feel right for you? Hope you’ll find something soon that feels right for you!💖💖💖
I feel you. It may just take a while for you to really figure it out. I'm almost 30 and realized just this year that I am non-binary, not saying it will take you this long, but figuring out who you are is really a long term project. Also, yeah, German pronouns suck, I just ask people to refer to me by name, it's not perfect, but it certainly feels better.
This actually helped A LOT thanks for this! :3
Biological sex isn’t a spectrum. There’s male, female, intersex. Also, being transgender or transsexual does not change your biological sex. Biological sex doesn’t affect gender identity though, as you said. But biological sex is important when visiting doctors or similar occasions. Embrace who you are but still make sure to acknowledge your biology, there are some significant differences apart from genitalia between male and female bodies.
Well said
I thought I was trans for awhile, ftm, however being identified as a guy made me uncomfortable. I don't completely like being a girl nor a guy, I always considered non binary but I was one of those people who believed there were only two genders. Maybe there's more, whether that would be three or four, I might fall under non binary or bi gender
@Randall Paquet I see what you mean, it does seem a lot more comfortable as a guy than a girl, however the only problem I have with it is OTHER GUYS lmao. I hope you figure everything out, I think right now I am a female with masculine tendencies along with a sprinkle of femininity here and there. I could go into the gender dictionary and find one that matches me perfectly, but I think I'm more comfortable with every one excepting me as a girl for now
I feel like she/her doesnt fit but other people say it does, I feel like I'm a she/they is better so im gonna see how it fits 😁
to me i feel more he/they even though im currently a she/her. i don't like being a she/her tho.
I tried the she/they pronouns since I didn't always feel like a woman and felt more in the middle and that clicked for me and felt right; just know you are valid and your identity and your pronouns are valid too. I hope whatever you choose goes well!
i asked my best friend to call me by she/they pronouns to experiment.
update i identify with she/her pronouns
I've been currently experimenting with she/they pronouns, will update
This video helped me SOO MUCH and the comments here too!! Thank you so much I figured out that I'm bigender (fem and non-binary) :)))
I kinda feel like I'm non-binary but unfortunately in my country, i can't express myself even around family:)
Same here :(
@@agnessfox9983 sorry we have to go through this I guess:)
I’m sorry I hope things get better for you xx
I realize I didn’t really like looking like a girl last year when I put a sports bra on and it was to tight and my chest was kind of flat, I was confused because I never thought of being something other than a girl. So now almost a year later I came out to my mother and sister and non-binary (they didn’t use my correct pronouns though) and I talked to my mom about a different name and we decided on one and they might start using it!
Yay!! (:
I’ve never questioned whether I’m a girl or not until recently, I want a flat chest and I’m starting to think I might not want to be perceived as a girl, but I feel like I’m doing for attention because I never had a problem with being a girl for 13 years of my life
@@irishughes9130 it’s never too early to question your gender but I felt like this for a couple years so I don’t know how I feel. I’ve learned that if you feel like your faking it your probably not you should just experiment and see if you like different pronouns and name
Awsome job I'm still stuck between being trans gender and Nonbinary but I know I'm lesbian
Can I ask how you found a name? Bc I’m thinking about it but I don’t even know where to start
The truth is that I have actually been feeling really confused about my gender,
but I'm not quite sure about who i am, and I wouldn't want to claim myself as non-binary without actually being it.
A few days ago, maybe a week ago, I realized that maybe i had signs of being non-binary. for example:
-When representing myself in a drawing, I usually draw or represent myself with non-binary characters.
Maybe that doesn't sound like a true sign, but, I realized that when people confuse my gender I feel good about myself.
Sometimes when I see myself with long hair, or very feminine, I don't feel quite right, but at the same time if I saw myself as a man I wouldn't feel right either. I mean, I don't feel bad as a girl, but I don't feel good either.
I realized that sometimes I feel comfortable wearing loose clothing that makes me look androgynous and having short hair.
Sometimes I think that its quarantine affecting me, but the more I analyze it the more I get confused.
sorry if my english is bad or if you didn't understand me. when i try to express my feelings in other language i sound really robotic u.u
It’s okay to experiment with labels and identities. If you identify as non-binary for a while and then realized that that’s not right for you, it’s okay to change what you identify with and you pronouns and stuff💖If you try something and it doesn’t work for you then you’ve only gotten closer to finding out who you truly are, by ruling out options, so don’t be afraid to experiment a little! You are valid, and even if you were to change the way you identify 10 times you would still be just as valid. There’s nothing better than finding out who you truly are and finally being yourself💖💖
I relate to this
same. i usually go with male characters as i don't know too well how to represent non binary, but i feel this.
I relate a lot to this
Me 1 to 1. Like.. literally 1 to 1. I relate to this so hard.
currently having a gender identity crisis
this is rlly helpful thank u so much!!!
x
I came out to my mom after I felt kinda comfortable but she doesn't accept it, she says that I am only saying this because of everything online. I've always felt non-binary but I didn't know what it was and now that I have a label I feel so much better but I still cant be myself because of my mom, the thing is everyone else around me support me and I'm really thankful for that.
I was born a biological female and for my whole life I’ve identified as a female and gone by she/her pronouns. I didn’t necessarily feel really uncomfortable or like weird when people referred to me as she/her but I kinda did feel like not entirely satisfied or like fulfilled if that makes sense. Just kinda like meh. Recently I’ve done research and I don’t think that strictly going by they/them is me fully. So i feel like the pronouns that best fit me are both she AND they. But like idk bc I don’t want to invalidate anyone or anything. I also know that identifying as both non binary and a woman is kind of like hard for people to understand but when I think about identifying as both, I experience gender euphoria like my heart does a little dance lmao Idk if this made any sense lolll
I think you should look at 'demigirl', it's a label for those who feel partly female, and partly genderless, many demigirls go by she/they. I hope this helps
@@juliamyburg8935 that makes so much sense !! Thank u for the help!!
@@savannahaldridge8884 your welcome!
yea its because your delusional and attention seeking im not trying to be mean im just telling you the truth think about your actions more please
Maybe you are demigirl or paragirl?
I love being feminine and feel okay with my gender, but sometimes I like knowing I don’t look like a specific gender and I like to be called they/them more then she/her but I’m still okay with it idk if I’m still valid or I just like androgynous looking styles, and I’m very confident in my body but I’m still very confused
I feel ya. I'm fine with my body, but idk if I really care what pronouns people use on me. Would love a bit of clarity, personally, but not sure if that info is even out there.
same exact thing for me i just decided recently i want to use both she and they but i’m nervous that i’m wrong and just confused
@@kira-py8gt I think its good to try things out (:
You are definitely valid :) I think you should look up the term “demigirl”. It’s means someone that uses both she and they pronouns
Some people go by she/her and they/them pronouns, you could look into demigirl and demigender maybe? I can’t say what’s right for you but no matter what you find out in the end you are valid, every sexuality and gender identity is valid💖💖
oml i love your channel. i feel so understood and i feel welcomed. so thank you so so much
This helped so much. Thank you!
sex: male
gender: non binary
Sexuality: pansexual
My "girlfriend and fiancee":
Sex: female
gender: sort of non binary xD
Sexuality: pansexual
... It's this relationship where I'm thinking about buying her a binder as a present, because I know she would like to dress up as a male and she is helping me with my makeup when I'm crossdressing as a female sometimes. We both where raised pretty much cis till we got 16 or 18 in my case xD we met on tinder two and a half years ago. We found out about our sexualities the day after we had a match, met a few days later and deleted tinder and burried it in the nearby forest or something or at least that's how I remember it
Awwwwwww that's cute :D
Aww that’s so awesome, does your partner prefer female pronouns? I’m glad yous are so supportive of each other, me and my wife are a little like this she’s tran feminine/trans female and has been in and out of the closet and I try to encourage and protect her whereas I’m more non binary and she encourages me to dress masculine when I want to
I feel uncomfortable when I get called girl, and I don't want to be a boy but I don't know if I'm non binary
Even if you’re not sure yet you can still call yourself nb now and try to figure it out slowly, as long as you’re comfortable with smth
Just go with what’s comfortable right now. If one day you feel nb, try it. If one day you feel male or female, try it. If you have friends/family that are okay with that type of thing you can ask them to try name/pronouns, if not I recommend a website called gender dressing room. It lets you use the pronouns and name you’re trying in sentences and stories
*Hayloft by Mother Mother starts playing*
Loved this! I figured out 2 years ago that I'm genderfluid and I could only recall as far back as 13 when it became obvious that I didn't feel like a girl most of the time. Listening to your experience, I'm reminded of the same experiences as a child so there were much earlier signs. This video touched my soul.
Thank you!!! You made this a lot clearer!
I remember one time I was playing a game with some friends online and a cousin of a friend there joined and we played for a little, and after a while, he asked if I was a boy or not. I felt pretty happy after hearing that. And another time, when I was at school, we were talking about random stuff, and I don’t really know how we got to this point, but then they started saying stuff like “Your basically a boy because of how much you act like us” (All of the friends were males btw) and that made me really happy as well. A third time was when I was commenting on a video and someone replied after chatting a bit, “Wait what do you go by, I called you a girl and I don’t even know” and I replied with “oh call me whatever it doesn’t matter” and then they continues to call me a girl, that made me kinda irk a little bit. (Wow this is getting long) A fourth time was when we were in P.E. and we were doing separate teams of boys and girls, and, obviously, I was sent to the girls team. I looked over to the boys teams and felt myself really hoping I was with the guys. I don’t really know what I wanna go by, but I know it’s definitely not a female. Thank you for reading this nonsense :)
Same yeah haha
I love my name and when you hear my name you can tell it is "girly" but I want a name that is as unique as Ophelia what should I do
adesso.laurenzo thx yea recently I have thought of Oakley or Pheonix to keep it on the same track
I would say that you definitely don't have to change your name. If you don't like that's it's "girly" Then I would recommend looking at names and seeing if you like them. I still deciding on a name that makes me comfortable, but for me I just had names that I liked.
why would you care about your name, it's just a name...
Mosca Reus, some people using they/them pronouns, or any other non-binary pronouns just don’t feel comfortable being called a name that is leaning more specifically to one gender. Some people can immediately think “oh you’re a boy” or “you’re a girl” depending on your name. Some non-binary people just feel more comfortable being called a name that has no gender included so people won’t jump to conclusions.
@@atlus5846 Imagine caring about a pronoun
I just remembered that a few years ago I was in a class and the teacher was like “ok lets do a trivia, boys vs girls” and I didn’t feel comfortable with the girls so I went to the assigned boys table... they ended up giving me up because they were cocky and I went back to the girls table, but they were begging for me to come back when they started losing (I didn’t go back to those low life’s because they turned me down first)
I'm so thankful you mentioned how you like being misgendered as a man at times - I'm struggling with all this at the moment, trying to figure myself out. Many things you said is what I tried to put into words lately. This definitely helped me to feel a bit more sure about this. Especially the "he/him" part. I love being called that with biological sex female and this little thing kind of weirded me out because I didn't know what to think about this. Liking to be called male even tho I don't feel like that either?
Anyways, thank you a lot! Those videos with someone naturally talking about and experience help a lot more than all those tests with millions of different confusing labels.
Anything in the gender fluid category is hell to figure out 😞 (gender fae here)
I thought they said “some people use Caesar” and I perked up and went “salad?”
Edit: when I first wrote this comment, a man sobbing over a cross-shaped stone, allowing himself a pained wail, “SHIIIZAAAAAA!”, meant nothing to me. My life has spiraled out of control.
Haha
Ceasar salad is the best!
Soooo helpful - thank for you this! I'm trying to learn more about NB and want to be a better ally :)
After some of my friends came out as genderqueer, I started realizing how much of a spectrum gender is. I think I’m non-binary and would like to use they/them and he/him pronouns. But now all I can think is that I just want attention or I’m just copying my friends.
I am so sorry you feel that way, from what you’re saying though it seems like a door was opened up to you, you peeked in, and recognized yourself in it. You are probably just feeling the anxiety a lot of lgbtq people feel, that we are worried we’re faking everything (even though we aren’t). If seeing your friend come out as genderqueer introduced you to the gender spectrum there is absolutely nothing wrong with that. And just know that I support you wholeheartedly
your words never fail to make me feel better laurenzo! this sort of information is good to get around! thank you for making this video :)💚
I used to wonder if I was genderfluid a couple years ago. I've never really felt like what society deemed as a girl. I had a very tomboyish personality growing up and didn't really fit in as a child. I've never really cared for particularly feminine clothes (skirts, bows, frills, etc) and usually wear more masc/ androgynous clothes. Yeah I liked some girly things but I felt off somehow. Everything about me from my personality to the things I liked just didn't feel like a girl. As I got older and learned about the lgbt+ community, it made me question if I even _was_ a girl. But the thing is, I don't really experience body dysphoria. My body is mostly fully developed now but I don't have a problem with it. (Although I don't have very large hips or bust so do with that what you will) Yeah, I prefer more masculine clothing but I still like to accentuate my feminine figure. So it made me wonder even more. If I don't experience dysphoria, am I even nonbinary or am I giving into the harmful stigma that girls are supposed to act and think a certain way? I've since come to the conclusion that, yes, I am female but every now and then I'll still wonder if I'm nonbinary. Can anyone else relate too or am I alone in this?
Yes same here!!
ne too
I feel the same way, but I’m still a minor
PastelFire 99 Me too, I’m 16. I’ve had a couple of friends call me by they/them pronouns for the past couple of months and I learned that it feels better, and she/her feels very “off”. Sometimes I feel like I’m faking being non-binary but I don’t reallt want to go back to identifying as a woman. I dont know, gender isn’t just a one day thing. It can feel strong on some days, and not so strong on others. All we have to do now is to be patient and it’ll take time to truly know ourselves. I wish you all luck on your discovery adventures!
don’t worry this is me!!! it’s not that i hate being female and personally, it’s more that i would be such a good man. idk if that makes sense, but like my interests and personality, and the way i sit - like it’s all manly. I would say i am a woman however, but if i could choose (before i was born) maybe i would have picked man? but it’s not like i want to change right now because woman doesn’t exactly feel wrong, it’s just that i would have been a rlly great dude. idk not exactly the same issue as you, but i definitely relate to several things there
Really helpful, thanks!! This video helped me get back on track of my thoughts and feelings. I've been stuck for a while in my exploration of gender identity mostly because of external influence (I'm scared to impose). But I'm getting a better insight into my self and closer to feel my gender identity. Thank you very much.
Wow that part with the emotions was...mind blowing somehow. Thank you!