Childhood Signs I Was Genderfluid AF
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- Опубліковано 6 гру 2021
- it's crazy how many times little me was trying to drop that hint "STOP TRYING TO PERFORM CISGENDER CUZ YOU AIN'T, HONEY!"
comment below your childhood signs, if you have them, cuz i will definitely get a kick out of reading them! but no worries if you don't-- it's not a prerequisite to being nonbinary, genderqueer, genderfluid, etc etc ❤️ U ARE VALID, BOO BOO! xxx
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I just want to share the cutest gender neutral nickname to call ur partner “lover/love” I just love it it makes me happy
My husband calls me his life partner (or lp for short) now instead of his wife and I have never been happier 😊
I call my boyfriend love all the time it's cute, and his small reactions are adorable
my partner calls me "love" i call them baby they are pangender and im genderfluid ⚡️💗
My girlfriend has been calling me "hey love" Ever since we got together and Its been hyping me up every time, its the cutest thing ever.
I personally don’t like when I’m called that, but it’s likely because my relationship isn’t that great.
In July I finally accepted that I'm bisexual and in November I started to get involved in the community. Only my girl crush and 4 of my closest friends know about my sexuality. Keara you have helped me to come to terms with my sexuality and not be afraid of this new path. I'm 19 but I guarantee you that I will NEVER forget you!! Take care ❤️🧡💛💚💙💜
🥳🥳🥳 congratulations and welcome to the club remember that your loved
And if not by anyone else remember that your loved by us❤️
I'm also 19 and I've known sexuality since 8th grade but I can't believe I'm still denying it... maybe because of the strict and conservative environment I'm in 💀
Exactly the same with me. Im bisexual and told this my best friend in July. Only she, my girl crush and 3 other friends know about it haha. And Keara was like the first point of contact with lgbtq. But I'm 15.
Congrats 😙
Welcome to the clubbbbbb
One time when I was probably like 13 or 14, I walked past the "men's" clothing section of a department store and had the thought "I want to wear those clothes, I love the color palette and style" and pictured myself wearing them, but then I shut that thought down. Also, whenever a creator or friend would come out as non binary, I would feel what I now believe to be envy. Enby envy, if you will.
how does wanting to dress masculine makes you a man
@@haeymzmdlcccc I'm not a man, I'm non-binary. And gender expression doesn't necessarily have anything to do with gender identity, it's just that, looking back, I can see that this was a sign.
@@haeymzmdlcccc It’s something they put in the clothes. A rare material that actually repels ciswomen. That’s why no ciswomen will ever feel an appreciation for Male clothes or wear the same materials or textures. Clothing preference and gendering is actually innate, not socially constructed, that’s why all cultures make all males wear the same clothes and female wear the same, non overlapping set of clothes.
as a kid i always wanted to be the boy characters from movies and shows like i was beast boy, sharkboy, dipper pines etc.
i once got called a “he” on accident when i was in primary school and that made me SO happy like i use they/them pronouns now but the fact that someone genuinely couldnt tell that i was afab made me so happy.
i would get so so pissed when the teachers asked for a strong boy to help move tables or to help with something and they never called on me.
yeesss
I was called a boy by accident in the store once. I had my hoodie on, and my brother and I were helping with the groceries. And the cashier said "Thank you boys for helping". It was funny to me, it also did make me feel happy too.
I had no childhood signs. Anything I could say might be signs would probably be contrived. My gender was pretty much tethered to nothing but sexism and sexuality. It was external, forced onto me. That's all I know.
I just didn't think or care much about my gender. I'm AFAB so I went by a girl and woman by default. I started studying STEM and the "women in STEM" label became part of me. It was helpful because I felt left out of those spaces, so I identified with womanhood through those struggles. I felt incredible infantilized in all my interests because of the major sausage fests, but theres much more diversity now where im studying.
I also understood womanhood through sexuality, which was also thrusted onto me. The only way I could appear sexy is by heightening my feminine features, so I'd spend time staring into a mirror or taking selfies. It felt like I was staring at another person - some random girl I was attracted to - but I didn't know I was attracted to women at the time. When stating pronouns became more normalized, I wanted to either not put any pronouns or say "any", but I figured that'd be weird coming from a cis woman. I told myself I was gender apathetic. It wasn't until I was able to engage sexually with someone in a way that was indescribably genderless that I broke through those shackles. I asked a few close people to use they/them pronouns for me and the euphoria I felt was exhilarating.
I was so confused, though, because I never disliked being a woman, but I never liked it either, I was merely apathetic. But now that I was exploring a nonbinary existence, I couldn't go back. It pains me to be perceived within the binary. But that was also confusing, because I hated coming to terms with dysphoria. It almost felt like I put it into my head because it was so new.
Realizing I was bisexual helped me realized that i didn't have to derive my sexual and romantic worth from being a woman. I started working out the way I wanted. I finally understand what it means to take control of your self image and be sexy for yourself. I wish I had a deep voice and a dick and a lot of the features cis men have literally just for me, cuz that would feel right, even though I worry less people will find tht attractive, I'd feel like the baddest bitch in the world. I feel both the power of femininity and masculinity in my soul, but I never understood what people mean when they say they just "feel like a gender". I barely understand gender. Some things feel wrong, and some just feel right. Well not just right, but exhilarating, liberating, and authentic! I realize that this is enough to make me nonbinary. Becoming in touch with who I am (whatever the fuck tht means) and feeling happier for that.
I still don't logically understand gender and think maybe anything I know about it is just internalized. But you know? That's OK. It's a quite influential construct. So instead of letting gender control me, I'm going to take the reigns and define my gender for myself, because I can.
@Lean Dean Getting someone else to call you something you want to be called doesn't sound like trying to control people, it sounds like asking them to respect you.
Anyway, if you think that I'm sure you won't mind me calling you Rosie and using ae/aem, because if I call you what you want to be called it means you're narcissistic and trying to control me! Shocking! 😱🙄
Anyway, it was nice talking to ya, Rosie. Thanks for your insight.
this feels so much like me,thank you for sharing this
thank you. you put such complicated feelings into words so eloquently, and it resonates hard. thank you
@Lean Dean not ur whole attempt of arguing being "oh this wasn't like this in the old ages 😦" like first of all
1. Queer erasure is a thing and non binary identities date back to several centuries in several cultures
2. Asking for respect isn't policing others it's called having dignity
And 3. Gender roles are a construct gender identity is very real and so is dysphoria literally pick a science book once in awhile
@Lean Dean ??? so by your logic, parents giving a name to their child is also a shitty thing because it "forces" others to call the kid that? "hey please can you use these pronouns for me" is not controlling, it's kindly asking and if someone does it they're not being controlled, they're just being respectful
I'm a trans guy, my childhood signs included but are not limited to:
-trying to pee standing up
-putting toys in my trousers to give the illusion of a peen
-crying when asked to wear dresses and getting grumpy when i had to
-asking for boy clothes
-wanting my hair super short
-pretending to be the boy in all the games
-calling myself 'Ben' and signing all my books as Ben
-crying when I learned I'd grow tits when I got older
-refusing anything pink because it's a 'girls colour'
-and scribbling out the 'princess' on the sign on my bedroom door and replacing it with 'prince'
The first one even I tried once in pre school didn't went well never tried to did that ever again.
I think it is the only childhood sign I ever had.
Edit:But I am not Trans though I don't know what my gender is.
I pretended that i hated pink and purple as a child because they were "too girly."
I actually really liked them, and still do.
@@Schnort yeah I like a good pink, but I always enforced how I liked blue bc that was a 'boy colour' and I didn't want to be seen as a girl
I did most of these as a kid, especially trying to pee while standing up. I'm genderfluid tho lol
@@Schnort i- exactly the same here- i just realis- wah- i-
last night, I realized i was genderfluid after a loooong time of trying to find a label that fit me.
I went from demigirl, to non-binary, to demigirl again, to genderqueer, to agender, and honestly I just feel so much better now. I used to go by any pronouns, really, but sometimes I felt more one than the other, and I now I feel more confident knowing that I don’t have it use all those pronouns all the time!
I went from trans ftm then I was upset because I didn’t want a specific label bud I didn’t know about genderfluid ect. I saw a video about a genderfluid person and immediately knew “that’s me”
I am lesbian and genderfluid as well:D
intreasting! I went from girl, demigirl, girl, demigirl,nonbianary, girl, demigirl, trans ftm, gender fluid.
Omg same like to a literal T.
are you me
A few of the times I should have known that I was not cis
1. When my teachers would split our class up into boy and girl groups I would always be the last one to the group I was "supposed" to be in.
2. I always wanted a beard
3. I would constantly think that if I was a boy, I would wear skirts and dresses
I read number 2 as "I always wanted bread" and I was so confused lmao
i never wanted a beard, but i really liked the idea of shaving it
Keara wanting to be a masc character for halloween and then me just wanting to be the things without gender (zombies, demons, etc) completely. My childhood brain completely said 'fuck gender i wanna be terrifying' and i love it. Thanks for helping my brain to click into it.
Well, girl costumes are stereotypical crap and sexy crap. I don't think it's particularly deep that (the majority of) girls DON'T prefer them........
I mean I don’t rlly “celebrate” halloween but like when ever my school had like a dress up day for a certain topic we were learning or like for childrens in need (we always had the themes superheroes) I would literally always like beg my parents for a Spider-Man/ red power ranger / superman costume (which my parents were like no to every time) even when we had the medi evil times topic going on I wanted to just be the “prince” “knight”
Literally like in year6(5th grade) we had a dress up day and my lil sis wanted to be super girl and I ofc wanted to be Spider-Man (cos of my obsession with him) that was the ONLY time my parents like let me half dress up as Spider-Man. Rlly they got me a Spider-Man mask and that it 😂
@@lunalee3021 seriously, all the ‘gurly’ costumes are either trash or liek HYPER SEXUAL
the timing of this video couldn’t be more perfect for me, i’ve been battling with my gender for months now and struggling to accept that i’m probably not cis and last night i played a game with my sister that i called “signs that i may in fact not be very cis after all” … it was fun and now instead of suppressing my discomfort/dysphoric feelings i’m trying to hold the idea in my head that i am probably not cis and follow what feels right, hoping it leads me to a happier place with myself
I wish you all the best! Being or not being cis does not define who you are as a person. Follow your heart and let yourself be happy!
You are allowed to be a gender non conforming girl/woman. It doesn't make you trans. I hate that people have such a narrow concept of what men and women are allowed to be, that any deviation from those norms means that you aren't actually a man or a woman. I hate that no one seems to see how damaging that is. I really can't wait for this trend to blow over.
@@dewilew2137 And everyone is also allowed to be non-binary. This is not a "trend" in the sense of a fashion. And no matter how broad or narrow someone's definition of "man" or "woman" is, not everyone feels like one of those.
Yea
i have been questioning my gender identity for about a year and a half now and i have still yet to come to any kind of conclusion haha. i came out as bi about four years ago, and i've always been happy as a cis female but over lockdown i spent a lot more time on the internet and i was exposed to a whole new world of people who were comfortable in their gender identities (most of which fell completely outside on the binary norm) and it was really the first time i'd ever experienced the non-binary and genderfluid community first-hand. i was insanely jealous of people who used multiple sets of pronouns, but specifically she/he or she/he/they sets. at first i dismissed it but the more i thought about it the more i realized that i kind of wanted those pronouns for myself.
and then this video came along and it's making me think back to my childhood haha in the same way that i wrote a song about being a lesbian (not fully understanding the gravity of the term at that time but just knowing that it was about women who liked other women) when i was eight years old, there are definitely things i relate to here and in the comments. i used to get so frustrated that i could never be in a mlm relationship because i was a girl. i criticized myself for fetishizing mlm but now i'm wondering if there is more to the story!! i've also always idolized male characters, particularly those who embrace their feminine sides. i am a very masculine person, in both my physique and my dress sense, and i don't particularly have a desire to connect with my feminine side just yet, but i don't really know what that means in terms of my gender identity. i hate dresses and i love going as male characters for halloween but i also do like to do make-up (still considered a girly thing sadly) and feel pretty and femme on rare occasion.
i asked some of my online friends to use she/her and he/him pronouns for me recently, and it felt really nice. i then worked up the courage to ask some of my irls to do the same and they've been pretty supportive too, but a lot of people have doubted whether i actually identify with these pronouns or if i'm just being attention-seeking or difficult. i'll admit that i know how hard it is for other people to keep up with pronoun changes and i really don't want to be a burden or make anyone confused, but it is slightly frustrating when people keep asking WHY i choose to use these pronouns - i definitely don't identify with the term non-binary but i don't know if i'm genderfluid or genderqueer or what.
sorry for the huge long rambly message - just wanted to pop in to say that this video has made me feel a lot better :)
Just a reflection - The shaming that comes with the word "attention-seeking" is so huge. But how can it be so wrong? It's okay to seek attention, we're humans, we don't like to be ignored and we want others to see us as who we really are.
I’m a cisgender girl and I also wanted to dress in a masculine costume for Halloween but now I think it’s because it allowed me the option to be attracted to girls that I did not know I could do as a girl…Fast forward to me only realizing I’m lesbian as a 21 year old.
I totally get this. I’m cis female (90% sure I am anyway!) and didn’t realise I was bi until I was 23. I look back at always playing the boy character and I think a big part of it was actually “oh if I’m a boy it’s ok for me to be attracted to girls” although that was definitely subconscious
I feel this *so* much. I’m cis female as far as I can tell, but I can only remember dressing up as a female character for Halloween *once* in my entire 24 years of life-all the others were either gender-neutral or male. I’m not sure if there was any subconscious stuff going on besides, “Oh, it’s Halloween. I can be whatever/whoever I want and no one can say anything!”
That said, I will actually be going as a female character this year…but that’s kind of only because I have a massive bi crush on them. 😅
@@AlexThomas97I'd make girl characters be boys so I could be attracted to them lmao
I like doing it just because I think masculine/androgynous costumes are really cool and pretty
I got cast as a party boy in the Nutcracker, so I got to wear a wig and wore victorian styled "boy clothes" I loved every minute of it and I had way more fun performing onstage as a boy. Perhaps I was a little drag king in the making....
Timestamps 😩👌
#1 2:29 "he-she" ⚧️
#2 4:17 "disappointed without pronoun options" 🙁
#3 5:04 "clothing swaps" 👕
#4 6:16 "male costumes for Halloween" 🎃
#5 6:50 "having male role models" 🎬
#6 7:32 "confident being referred by he/him" ♂️
#7 8:32 "auditioning for male parts in plays" 🎭
#8 9:28 "gender envy towards others" 😒
Remember to feed pets, water plants (and yourself), and have a good day/night ♥️
I also dressed up as the opposite gender for Halloween
WAIT! NOPE! We can't go any further without discussing how incredible this picture of you as a kid is. It's just amazing 🥰🥰🥰🥰
7:50
omg I had a similar experience to you wanting to be a “h*she” when I was exposed to the slur “sh*male”. I was like 12 when my friends were throwing it around in a derogatory way and and internally I was like…how do i be one?
Asking for a friend 😂 pretty gross that one of my earliest exposures to the existence of trans identity was through a slur, but funny to look back on now.
Honestly same I thought the two were the coolest things to call someone and I wasn't aware of the hate it could cause towards trans people. Then when I found out it was offensive I felt so ashamed and I didn't know my feelings about the two words could lead to me having a gender crisis and have to ignore my real gender for years later on, lol but I'm good now, I have full love for being Pangender and encourage people to be themselves for who they are gender or sexuality. :))
I had friends that would say that word too, back then I thought it meant a girl that was also part boy.
I was assigned female at birth and I wanted to know how I could become at least part boy if I was "unlucky enough to be born female"
@@pokemongrl1994 being born female is NOT unlucky, despite what it's popular to say on youtube
I remember being aged 3 to 5 and throwing temper tantrums whenever I would be called a "sweet little princess" or whenever I would get very gendered compliments. I remember being called a "pretty girl" and literally screaming: "Don't call me that!". For a long time, I thought I just didn't like endearment terms as a child, but I felt perfectly comfortable with more gender neutral compliments, so that was't it. I still remember how uncomfortable being called a "pretty girl" made me feel but I've only recently realised why it made me so uncomfortable.
Another sign is that, when I was 5, I went through this phase where I told everyone my name was Shaun the Sheep and I wouldn't respond to any other name other than Shaun the Sheep. This lasted for a whole year.
The one thing that was really the turning point in my gender journey was the fact that I would get so upset when my mom didn't appreciate when I'd where more androgynous or masculine clothing, and would try and convince me to dress more feminine. I didn't like that she saw me as strictly female. I didn't want my female gender to be the first thing people saw when they met me. I realized that it wasn't about clothing, it was about not wanting others to perceive me as a woman
I kind of get the same. Thankfully my mom doesn’t try convince me to dress feminine but she gives me more (or any) compliments when I do. I would ask her for validation about my non-feminine outfits and that would matter way more than what she thought of any of my other looks.
Only the OGs know that she was rocking that hairstyle on Instagram a few days ago. Stunning!! In the middle of this year I accepted my bisexuality, and Keara you have helped me so much. Now I'm not afraid of this new path, I embrace it. I'm 19 but I guarantee you that I will NEVER forget you!! ❤️
That's awesome! Congrats! I'm bisexual too.
welcome to the bi agendaaa
Jo. K. Thanks. But what's worse is that I have Down syndrome too. Together it makes my life much more difficult, and add transgender to the mix it makes it extremely dark, and dangerous, and sometimes I want to end it all, and commit suicide. But I'm never going to 'cause I don't want to.
@@williamoconnell1233 Im sorry to hear that. Its easier said than done but support yourself with true friends who respect you and do what makes you happy. I wish you the best 💛
People sometimes ask me, "If you're not a woman then why do you look like one?" For me it's because I don't see a reason to have my presentation match my gender. I know a lot of people do, but for me I don't have a strong "mind/body connection" so, far from being dysphoric when I look female, to me it's more like someone having a female avatar or playing a female character in a video game. Like yes, this body thing appears female, but that has no connection to my brain or my gender. Idk
I’ve been questioning my gender since I came out as bi 18 months ago and this really resonated with me. I remember when I was in year 7 we did Peter Pan as a school play. All the year 7s were cast as the “Indians” (Problematic in my very white rural English school but that’s another conversation) so I was originally cast as and Indian and so were all my friends. But the year 8s and 9s were cast as lost boys and I remember being so adamant I wanted to be a lost boy instead. I spoke to the drama teacher, who was also my form tutor, and begged him to let me be a lost boy and he did. I got to wear green (which of course was my fave colour) and be explicitly a boy which I just loved. My character was called Sleeves and although I had no lines I was referred to with he/him pronouns.
Like you said, whenever there was chance to dress up I always wanted to be a boy character. When I was little I had a buzz lightyear costume I wore to death and if you asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up it was buzz lightyear. Same again, me and my friends would get into new tv shows and each assign ourselves a character we related to and mine would always be male. I never remember explicitly wanting to be a boy irl (I’ve never thought that I’m a trans man) but I loved presenting in a masculine way and liked having the world see me that way. And really didn’t mind if people mistook me for a boy growing up.
My name is Alex and I’ve always loved that that’s gender neutral. But it’s short for Alexandra so I also like having the option that if I’m filling out a form or something and want them to know that I am a woman I can write Alexandra but if I don’t want them to know (or assume) my gender I can put Alex. Anyway that was a stream of consciousness from my brain 😂 maybe someone else reading this will relate x
Oh yeah I relate so much to the anger towards people who were "allowed" to express their identity because I was too afraid to do it myself
I thought everyone switched genders and got uncomfortable after being in a suit/dress long enough until I saw my friend at a birthday party with a dress on for 4 hours.
I was 7 and literally walked up to them and said, “Hey, dude, how are you still surviving in that dress? Don’t you want to wear a suit or something?” and they said, “Huh? What do you mean?”
I also told my dad when I was 5 that I sometimes felt like a boy and sometimes like a girl and sometimes like I had nothing to identify with.
And a few aroace moments for your enjoyment:
This was lunch and my friend had dates as a snack. My friend said, “I don’t like dates but I hate the fact that I can’t get any real ones.” I sat there for about 6 minutes being confused because they had real dates? What? And then it hit me.
My friends and I were on the topic of things being pointlessly gendered. I said, “Apparently, in Germany ‘the’ changes based on the gender something is. Like you would say ‘the ball’ with male ‘the’s. So, like ‘the boy ball’.” Everyone laughed. Someone said “Out of all the examples, you had to pick that!” I had a loading button over my head. Another person said “You should have done something different, like ‘the boy water bottle.’” It took me a day to figure out.
Yeah, I have lots more but those are from the top of my head.
Biggest sign for me:
In the start of teen years, because more of my friends started to experiment with different labels (surrounding sexuality and gender), they would often refer to me as Cis, and I didn't know why, but I'd flinched EVERYTIME they said it.
I recently came to terms with my identity as a genderfluid 17 year old. Hearing all of these childhood signs helped me fight away my impostor syndrome and this sense that I don't fit this sort of box, And I appreciate that a lot!
I was born a girl and am fully accepting of this. I use she/they/he pronouns. Though of course this is when the impostor syndrome kicked in before I realized gender fluidity isn't about being all genders equally. You can resonate with each differently in different ways.
Ever since I was little I always loved dressing up as male characters for Halloween and playing with monster trucks and fps games, often characterized as more "masculine" things to grow up on. Even as a kid (this also ties into sexually) I said to my sister, "I wish I was a boy so that I could date girls." I was always jealous of the boys and how freely (and this was just my mindset back then) they got to play with boyish toys and go out and ride on 4-wheelers out in the mud, and go on other masculine trips and all that jazz. Mostly though I was jealous of "them being able to date girls" as I didn't quite grasp the concept of homosexuality. As I grew older and learned I still refused to accept that I was gay and was grossed out about it even until some of my friends started to come out and I learned to accept it.
This didn't happen much later for the trans community. I was transphobic until late into me being 15 years old until I started to associate with more trans people. After that, I accepted the community as a whole never thinking I was actually part of it until I became the president of my school's GSA Club of over 80 people.
Seeing all the trans/queer/genderqueer people there sparked an odd jealousy in me. A jealousy that it was so seemingly easy for them to place a peg on who they are when I wanted to be everything, but still was okay with being perceived as a girl.
Seeing this video made me so happy because I realize now that I'm not the only person who felt this way as a little baby genderfluid person learning about my gender. ❤
I’m gender fluid but tend to feel more masc most of the time, when I was 5-6 I was convinced for a whole two years that I was a boy monster in a human girl body and told everyone that it was true. That was probably my biggest sign, lmao.
I would also choose the blue ‘male’ figure when playing The game of life, I did the same playing video games. I hated dresses but sometimes I didnt(??)
I never felt comfortable in the girls group or the boys group at drama.
i used to (and still do) feel separate when hanging out with my girl friends, like it was me and a group of girls, i wasn’t one of them. it’s only something i’ve picked up recently as i never rlly knew what that feeling was when i was feeling it. it’s definitely something i’ve picked up on more after realising i’m not straight and my perception of people and group environments has changed
Uh! Saaaame
I legit thought and said to many people that “I wish I was born a boy” and I was still like *yeah I’m cis.* Like BITCH.
I struggled for a while about my gender but I accept myself and love myself for being genderfluid now. The funniest part is that when I was younger people always said “ur not a girl you sound like a boy” and called me he whenever I played fill on Xbox games. I hated it and was upset that I sounded like a “boy” but yeah now I vibe with he/him a lot more and don’t really like she/her most of the time. I think I don’t like she/her very much mainly cuz people just call me that by default and it’s really annoying, especially the people that I knew before I realized I was genderfluid. My mom only calls me she, I don’t correct her cuz I’m afraid to. She knows I’m genderfluid and that my pronouns change.
I think back then I wanted people on xbox to respect me as a girl, but then I realized people on Xbox don’t respect girls… hahaha *pain*
Also I really love being called bro, idk why
I honestly can bark even remember the bad times when I was invading myself and all that, sometimes it feels like it never even happened but it DEFINITELY DID. It wasn’t even that long ago either like I said I hated being genderfluid like last month. After I healed mostly I watched a bunch of genderfluid/gender queer tiktoks and that REALLY helped me accept myself and feel valid:)
Sorry this is so long- If anyone bothered to read this, thanks!
YOUR HAIRRRRRR!! OH MY GOSHHHHH! I LOVE YOUR HAIRRRRR!! IT LOOKS SO DAMN GOOD ON YOU 😍
I LEGIT HAD A SLIGHT BI PANIC WHEN I SAW IT JUST AHHHHHHH
help i read that as i got bi panic from ur hair 😭
LOL had such a laugh at the Halloween one. So relatable! I'd always go as male characters too and it made me feel awesome. Now I finally understand why. :P
I recently came out as FtM (female to male trans) and I remember when I was younger we would play on school grounds and we would be with like 5 girls as a friend group and we would play certain characters and when there was a male character I always wanted to be that. I already knew at the time I did not like dressing as a girl and never really felt like a girl so it makes sense now lol.
Woah- I haven’t been this early before!!
I just wanted to say that, you’re a really big inspiration to me, Keara!! I love you and your content so much, and you’ve really made me feel comfortable in my queer identity!! Thanks so much for being the lovely person you are! Sending my love from Texas, USA ❤️🧡💛💚💙💜
I literally smiled so much when Keara gave the camera a hug at the end
Loved hearing your story Keara! Your stories from theatre remind me of how I went from playing women and feminine characters in the past to playing two lead male characters this past year. :)
On signs, my advice would be that you could go over the top with trying to attribute childhood traits or events to a newly realised gender or sexual identity, however, it's important to remember hindsight is 20/20 - if someone had noticed / if you'd noticed the signs earlier would you be different now is a rather bad what-if rabbit hole to fall down, and could even be potentially harming (because you get mad at not realising earlier). It's definitely better to just go "huh, that thing now makes more sense" if you remember something odd, but to go actively looking to seek validation of current feelings is likely to cause some internal or external conflict.
At least, that's what I realised myself when I started to fall down that rabbit hole 🤷🏻♀️
This is good advice!
Omg the pictures of littleKeara!! So adorable! That green 'sea monster' outfit is absolutely the stuff I wore in my pre-teens/teens.
I am so happy to see that you got the haircut you always wanted! You look good and confident with it ❤️
love your hair keara! I might get a similar haircut soon :D
I also want to say thank you for talking so openly about your gender on your channel, it helped me a lot when I was still questioning and it's one of the things helped me gain enough confidence to come out to my parents (which went well, they're very supportive)
im a genderfluid person too and i RELATE SO MUCH WITH THE TV SHOW ONES i would always look up to the guy characters and want to be them so bad and sometimes i feel like i relate more to the guy characters than the girls 😭
Love your sweater! I'm a knitting nerd, so I appreciate a good sweater. :P
Never been this early! Love your videos, keep being your wonderful self and making fantastic content! Also, love the haircut!!
Thank u for sharing yourself w ze internet! You and your presentation(s) r so important:)
wow girl your new hair is on fire 💞🔥
thank you so much for this video keara
It's so interesting to look back and think now I know!! 😄 Also loving the new hair 😍
LOVE the hair, keara! keep being incredible ☺️💕
Omg! I love your hair! 🎶"you got that James Dean daydream look in your eyes...."🎵
I am genderfluid, AFAB. I should have admitted it to myself when I was a teenager, and saw the movie Don Juan de Marco. During the end scene, when the four of them were on the beach and the women were wearing such beautiful summer dresses, I remember thinking that I should want to wear THAT -- but, instead, I wanted to be Johnny Depp!
I had always fluctuated between phases of frilly dresses and phases of gender neutral "tomboy" clothes. But, that was the first time I had ever wanted to be a guy!
ahhhhhh ur hair looks so good keara 💖
Love you too
Keara!! Love your haircut! Speaking of haircuts and leather jackets, you we're such a badass in that The D Cut cast hoto!! ❤️❤️❤️
I freaking love the hair!!!!
Your hair is AMAZING!!
I'm questioning my gender and here how childhood went for me (I'm AFAB)
1: I liked a lot of feminine things but LOVED a few masculine things
2: I remember a specific time where I saw my dad take off his shirt and I took off mine and my family yelled at me and said it's "inappropriate" and I just wanted to do what i want
3: I couldn't really imagine myself in a relationship, and I feel like this is for more reason than me being aroace. When I felt pressured to want a relationship, I pictured myself having the "stereotypical male" role in the relationship. I once roleplayed as a lesbian character, which may mean something.
4: I found myself enjoying more stereotypically "masculine" things more often as I grew, and things I liked to do switched.
5: I loved dresses, makeup, etc.
6: I had a "crush" on Mario from the Super Mario games but I think it was just me wanting to be like him! I used to tape items from the games on my wall, for example!
6: I HATED talking about puberty but was still interested in it. I don't mind my changes but I wish they didn't associate me with femininity. I see that may be a reason I was so upset to get my period
There may be more but that's what I can think of!
THESE WERE EVERYTHING KDJSGHSDL
Omg your haircut looks soooo good!!
YOUR HAIR LOOKS AMAZING!!!!!!
OMG UR HAIR LOOKS AMAZING AHHHH
Your hair!!! omg!
ur amazingggg!
wooooow ur new haircut suits you sooooo good omg 🥺 i hope you enjoy playing with the new looks in fluidity (also if you once find out how to draw on a beard or so - let us know!🙏!) ✨i'm super exited to see more and more looks from you now🥺
2:00 a good metaphor for labels is labels are boxes and people are cats. Force a cat into a box or someone into a label and they won’t like it at all. But if you let them find a box that they like and find fitting, they will get right in. Boxes sometimes can be cosy and secure, and some ppl like to have something that they fit into, something that describes them. (Not saying any identity is a strict box in any way tho)
I know it's been a long time since you posted that vid, but I felt I needed to get this off my chest.
First of fall - thank you! You've really made me feel valid with my gender fluidity, and it turns out we've had some very similar childhood signs. After watching it, I realized I have A LOT of pics from my childhood when I was "dressed up" in a very feminine way and it "confirmed" my sense of identity even more.
As an AMAB person, I've definitely had different experiences but the acting part really reminds me of my younger self. I've always had a ton of wigs and loved to act as women. I even remember coming to a primary school party dressed up as a girl (with make-up, nails painted, etc.) and telling everyone to refer to me as a girl. And I was like 11 back then.
In my country there's little to no public knowledge about being non-binary, so it was hard for me to get to know myself in a really heteronormative society but... Lately, everything has started to make sense!
Now I know I am genderfluid and people like you make me feel less confused and truly valid. I'm almost 21 now and this year I'm gonna follow the rule of "STOP TRYING TO PERFORM CIS CUZ YOU AIN'T, HONEY".
Fuck the cis-tem and, again, thank you!
I love your new haircut!
My lord the internalised lesbophobia is strong in these times ain’t it
Why u say that
Love the new hair
Can we just appreciate the vibe and look of editor Keara they look amazing
Love the new hair!!!
I love the new hairstyle! I think in your video a few days ago you said you were going to get it done. It looks nice!
Good for you in figuring this out!
These are actually some really cool stories. I wish I'd had the confidence to try to play a character of a different gender from my agab in a mother-loving Catholic school.
As an afab person, when I was a child, my mom used to say that I had “manly” shoulders, that I had inherited my grandpa’s shoulders. But at a certain point when I got a bit older, I don’t know how we ended up talking about this again, but I said something about those “manly” shoulders of mine and she said that no, that they were not “manly” anymore and that remark actually upset me. I realised I was actually proud and happy of my “manly” shoulders. And I was disappointed that I hadn’t them anymore. I guess that could count as a sign of my genderfluidity. Also I identified with male characters too (and also with female ones).
omg you look so gorgeous today, I love your hair
I reallyyyy appreciate seeing this gender content and representation, as it’s much harder to find than sexuality content and representation in my experience.
I had an interesting experience while acting too. We played "Ronja Räubertochter" in my also deeply catholic all girls school so the male roles had to be played by girls too. I played Lovis, the mother of the main character and I never fehlt better. I mean it wasnt about realizing I could live with another gender, but I realized how much I want to be a loving mother someday. I felt the emotions of this fictional characters so hard that I started crying at the most emotional scene of the play. Sadly I never participated in a play ever after that even though I love acting so much. But I feel like I can't handle so many passions at once because I also dance, play guitar and pursue a career in illustration. Anyways, sorry for my babbling. I love your videos. They helped me so much understanding what was going on with me when I realized I like girls too.
your videos are so helpful, Thank you!
Love you so much Keara ❤
I love your hair, it’s awesome
Im amased at people having channels like this! Its aweome i love it. Keep doing what your doing! Coz im rainbow af!
I love your sweater!
You got the hair cut! Niceee
We adore you Keara
My biggest flex as a sapphic woman is that I met and fell in love with my girl in October.
Love your hairstyle!!!!
When I was little I was obsessed with Ben ten. I even went to a concert in a full Ben ten costume and some dude shouted “look mum there’s a girl dressed up as ben ten!” It didn’t bother me since I felt like I was living the dream.
I also always liked the colour green and always felt like a ‘tomboy’ but then some days I would feel like a ‘girly girl’ (as people would describe cisgendered girls). Now I’m genderfluid and these things makes a lot of sense now. :))
The hug at the end
Keare started talking "oo that makes sense" my mind shouted🔥❤🌈
Keara AN ABSOLUTE ICON!!! That hair I- jehskahsirbwivs
Honestly I can only really think of one sign but I would wear pretty dresses and stuff one day, then the next I would be like, *NOPE I WANT THIS OFF MY BODY NOW* so even though I still present mostly feminine I still have those days where I'm like, "nah I think I'm feeling more male/neutral"
And I had a hard time realizing I was genderfluid bc I always saw, "One day I'm female, next I'm male" when I never really felt 100% male but also not 100% female, non binary, agender, etc... I just felt a little bit of it all sometimes. So the fact that you madee realize you don't needa be 100% of something and it can just be in between sometimes rlly helped! Ty ❤️
I don't have a lot of childhood memories related to gender and that makes me feel invalid or fake, but I remember having phases where I wanted to dress more androgynous and days I complained to my friends that i would be pretty only as a boy. then in 2020 I realized that I was not cis. first I thought about being an butch lesbian, then gender neutral, a demigirl, then bigender (male/female) until I realized I was feeling neutral again, so I came with the conclusion I am genderfluid
I love your story! I had very similar experiences. I grew up doing theatre (and continue to do so) and remember always wanting to play boys. I was heartbroken when I learned that I’d never get to play a “pants role” in opera because I’m a soprano. I remember the first time I got to play a boy (The Artful Dodger 😍) I was So Euphoric. And then I started to do drag, and was like “wow this is absolutely amazing! I wish I could feel this all the time!”
I just came out as genderfluid in the summer and it feels so right 💗 It’s so nice to hear someone else’s story from a theatre standpoint! 😍😍😍😍😍😍
I have one main sign that I was bi, and it was that one time, when my parents, my sister, and I were at a restaurant, and my dad told me that it wasn’t polite to stare. I was staring at a FEMALE waitress. (BTW, I’m a cis girl)
Love your new hair 😊
I looove this video omg, as another afab non-binary person these type of experiences are not talked about enough! I have so many memories of little things that I thought or felt in my childhood that were HUGE signs
I luved this 💛
I love ur hair! I actually have the same haircut lol. I like parting it in the middle I think it's such a power move for me being genderfluid
ive known since i was a child i wasn’t straight but i grew up religious so homophobia was my way of denial. ofc that caused a lot of issues now as i am on my journey of self acceptance. i’ve spent the past 2-3 years doing so and feel comfortable with my sexuality. i’m 19 and came out to my best friend when i was 17 and still haven’t told anyone else. i’m still scared to tell anyone else out of fear of someone’s rejection destroying my security. Keara i’ve watched you since the beginning, thank you for being a huge part of my journey 💖💖💖
also just wanted to come out to the lovely community here as pansexual 🏳️🌈
Early! Ly Keara!
I'm the 3rd like!
this is so cute!
Hay Keara I just got two teeth pulled today and I'm in alot of pine ( not to mention people touching my mouth gives me major anxiety) but overall I've had a really tough day seeing your face today really made my day🥺
hope you're doing okay!! :)
I rly needed this
You look so good without makeup 🌈
Still figuring things out, but I'm calling myself enby or genderfluid at the moment. I think I was mostly indifferent about my gender. I went back and forth between liking girly things for a bit, not caring, and then being a hardcore tomboy. I do have a distinct memory of thinking my voice was going to drop 😅. Last year, I had been experience something for months when I realized that it was dysphoria. So it has been a fun ride trying to figure myself out. When I think it's figured out, my dysphoria changes, worsens, or goes a way for a bit.