How to Become the Person You've Always Wanted to Be
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- Опубліковано 10 вер 2024
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WHO AM I
Hey there, I’m Clark Kegley, a former pro drummer turned self-improvement advocate. Here on UA-cam, I provide guidance to help you transform into your 2.0 version.
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Ready to change your life? It all starts with asking yourself the right questions. Get the 11 questions to change your life now (free gift for yt subs): www.clarkkegley.com/free-questions
In the last 5 months both my dogs died and then my GF moved out after 5+ years, less than 3 weeks after my last dog went. Needless to say I have been in quite a state. Your videos have helped a ton, the YT algorithm brought me here and I am glad it did.
Wow you are a trooper very impressive. It will get better (like it always does when we look back)
Hang in there. That's so much. Honor your grief. Honor that your life is what it is, right now. Honor that there will again be good things in your life to come. ❤
So sorry to hear you're going through it right now. That's so tough. Even the caterpillar must self-cannibalize in order to metamorphosize itself into a beautiful butterfly... hang in there, you're entering the inevitable transformation inside the chrysalis. 🦋
Just finished a 9 year relationship. I’m going to be giving it my all to be my absolute true self from this point on 🙏
You can do it!
All the best!!
Man I feel you….my wife of 25 years just walked out and it crushed me. The truth is I got complacent and took things for granted….ultimately she got bored and tired of dealing with my depression. I became the needy nice guy and it cost me…..now it’s time to fight like hell to survive this.
@@worldwideredsshow73 Fully focus on you and your needs. Keeping busy and getting all those outstanding things done is helping me 🍻
Been there. It was for 6 years we even lived together. Trust me you can do it. My advice is just appreciate this experience now is time to meet yourself better. You can do it.
The other day I found an SD card in my dad's old phone, saw a couple of videos of me as a child doing random stuff and I found it very comforting.
There is a comfort in seeing the innocence of us as kids, hey 🫶
Funny enough, I used to be shy & introverted (maybe because of upbringing & personal hardships) but since uncovering all the nitty gritty of my past unspoken life, I sometimes find myself being someone I never thought I could be ( funny, good humored, very chatty & not at all intimidated anymore!). The unconscious need (or want) to catch up & make up for the lost years being the person I would have liked or was meant to be. Very insightful, thank you!
Love this for you! ❤ i am aiming for this as well 🎉
We can choose to reinvent ourselves at any time-releasing our story of how we identify ourselves at present, regardless of how long we held that identity for-and choosing to keep the best parts of ourselves while laying the groundwork for new layers of identity to take hold. Sounds like a meaningful transformation for you! 🌱
Honestly Clark, this was the most impactful video I’ve ever watched in MY LIFE. I know that sounds super dramatic but it’s true. For the last half year I’ve been stuck in what I call a vicious cycle of pure OCD that’s been hyper fixated on being the best version of myself. I even went to Tony Robbin’s “unleash the power” which was like 600 bucks and I thought that was going to be the answer. Well. Turns out it wasn’t. It actually left me feeling worse than I did before I started. Do I regret it? No. I took a lot from it but at the same time it caused me to go on this never ending cycle of starting over because anytime the “bad” part of myself would eventually show up, I would wrestle with it and say no that’s not me! The perfect version doesn’t have these feelings or thoughts or behaviors or low moments… and the cycle would go on and on and on…. Start over. Mess up. Feel like shit. Start over. Mess up. Feel like shit.
You get the point.
There’s been times I would look back at my imperfect self and be like… “man that guy was crazy but at least he knew himself then”
It’s been the craziest irony … to be at the pinnacle of my self improvement journey but to feel the least amount of myself.
Anyways, if you read this. Thank you, If someone else did and experienced the same thing as me…
I just want you to know. I love you. We are going to be okay and right here right now… we are setting ourselves free to be who we truly are. ❤
Haven’t watched the full video yet, but I resonate with the Tony Robbins part. I’ve skimmed through parts of Tony Robbins’ book “Awaken the Giant Within” and am still reading through it. Like you, I have felt ashamed of myself for slipping/reverting back into past behavior/mentality thinking that’s not the version of me I embody anymore desperately trying to shed that old identity to form this new, idealized and “perfect” identity of myself. It is a vicious cycle.
Well said as i have felt the same way
WOw that is the deepest reply i have ever seen!!!!
I understand after reading your reply that yes the messy part will always be there , its life i guess. I also used to shun the thoughts whih doesn't fit into that better version but i guess it stays!!!
Thanks
I feel like anyone walking the path of personal development has felt like this, some way or another. It comes down to 'integrating the shadow'-finding (at least some level of) acceptance with the flawed, messy, and plain human aspects of ourselves. They will show themselves and rear their heads, no matter how evolved we've become from past versions of ourselves, no matter how long we've been ascending the ladder of personal growth.
Regularly practicing forgiveness-not just of others, but of self-has been really powerful for me to give myself grace whenever I feel like I'm not 'measuring up' (whatever that means), alongside the resolve to keep trying, to keep doing better, as best I can.
Wish you well on your path. 🙏🌱
I truly have become the person my younger self would look up to. It did take 8 years to fix the 32-year wirtg of BS, but I'm so glad I found myself. Stay Uncommon!
I love this! ❤
That's amazing to hear 🙌 Also, "stay uncommon"-I dig it!
In the high school, I found students needed to--and most learned to--pick their spots. Putting up a front is actually beneficial with others they don't trust. Letting their guard down and being real is reserved for their positive peers. It is common that the inauthentic persona takes over. It's a balance and it takes support to work this art!
Honestly I really admire the way you were able to describe everything with such detail. This is exactly what I felt and feel at times.
I've never become the person I've always wanted to be. I have become blander and stale with each passing year. You can never deny the effort that goes into self improvement. It should never be taken granted.
Maybe that’s just because you’re so familiar with yourself.. others may be enchanted by you because to them you’re a mystery :) I bet you’re ace! 😘 x
I feel the same exact way for myself. I can envision and feel myself being so outgoing and taking risks but I always play it safe. I don’t want to anymore. It’s time to improve and let me real me shine
I am opposite. I am always going out to look for troubles, and do stuff to actually destroy mysel 😢
@@whitewolf9547 shine your light brightly so your people may find you 😘
@@nieczerwony you’re very wise to recognise that in yourself 😘
"Pushing yourself is not forcing yourself" - thank you for this phrase, Clark! For a long time I felt like there are many things that I have to do that I just could not stand any longer, but then I was comparing them to "but I am also not always excited about doing sit ups too, for example, but those are good for me" and kept forcing myself into doing those things and feeling miserable about how much they drained me. After this quote, I am realizing that often times I wasn't just pushing myself towards something beneficial - I was forcing myself into exhaustion. It's a very important distinction that I used to ignore for too long
There's a fine line between pushing and forcing...I find it tricky
I want to share my thoughts on this. While growing up life was good without social media, except for the internet. My childhood was good even though there were times that make me feel down, and until my adulthood which I am now turning 26 this year. My depression is getting worse because of the crying, hurting others, and anger issues. And, now I'm struggling to get myself to be motivated to exercise and also keep in mind having no motivation is symptom of depression, and I'm planning on getting therapy for motivation, and my mental health.
I think what may help me is connect with my inner child. Because while growing up I enjoy watching movies and shows I grew up watching, physical activities I enjoy, and etcetera.
For depression I think the solution for this mental illness for me it would probably be healing myself and starting my own healing journey. My mom always tell me to forgive others and yourself because it's part of the healing process, and I can't ignore that. I am still struggling with depression and I am doing my best to become the person I want to become. Currently, I am practicing self love which can also help with loving parts of yourself without judgment.
Harmony - Its OK to practice self love until you are self love. Its like meditation, you sit, and don't try to stop the thoughts you look at them... where they come from, and where they are going. Look at the movies you loved - is that where you want your persona to be, or where it came from. I was Heathcliff from Wuthering Heights - Love was supposed to hurt ... until I realized its just part of the story. Keep going. Learn from therapy, it can show you the way, so you can find your own path. Remember to smile :-)
The Untethered Soul - Your recommendation, actually helped fe understand this and I sincerely want to say thank you. It is now the most amazing book I have ever read and I am only half way.
My theme for the year is authenticity. I’ve been working hard to have compassion for all of me, I loved the question on what makes you cringe. Thank you for taking your time and energy to share these messages. I definitely felt this video resonate with me.
What a powerful reminder that we don’t need to hide behind a persona to be loved or accepted.
But to know that true strength comes from embracing all of who we are, flaws included.
Let’s embrace who we are, imperfections and all!
Even if perfection did exist, because of the human condition, we'd find flaws in it and once again deem it as being 'imperfect'. Embracing all aspects of self really is true strength. 🙌
I asked god to give me a sign and i got this videos notification. Thank you for guiding me on how to improve myself clark.
I really like the calming meditative music in the background, it helps calm my anxiety
How many people love Clark kegley❤
i feel like I reconnected with my own self just after finishing this video 😂❤ ! that was so inspirational and amazing ✨✨✨
Love your videos. Even when you talk about negative things you make it sound positive. I have been struggling to start my YT channel for various reasons, but every time I watch yours I am inspired by the positive genuine influence.
Omg little Clark 😭😭😭😭 as a mother, this made me emotional. And taking your course, and seeing how amazing it can be for your life, wow. Love this
Your videos have always been a support for me clark
I feel like I have suppressed all good qualities about myself… shame to say this world is too crazy to be a good person and to be natural. I am surprised people are still reading my poems but I still have to choose my words wisely… even though I don’t want to 😅 so many times I heard : people don’t want to hear the truth! It’s not helping anyone. I think I took it too seriously.
Pretending to be perfect or someone else took a toll on my health. It gave me fibromyalgia. It was so exhausting to be someone else. I didn’t listen to my doctors when they said I was going to make myself sick if I kept up my lifestyle. Now I’ve been working to unearth the real me because I have no other choice than to spend a lot of time in bed with chronic fatigue. I paid a big price but I hope to be healthier and fully authentic someday.
Yes it is the stress of society and certain expectations that shuts down part of us during childhood years 🤗but im enlightened by bumping into your channel since 2020 😆
Damn.... Thanks for sharing. I appreciate it. I needed to hear this today. ❤
I took it as my responsibility to find myself again. Going on my 8th month of almost isolation but Im discovered so much about me 🥰🥰 i encourage everyone to take the journey to discover who you abandoned😢
I stumbled across your channel last week by way of your celery juice video. Best accidental find ever! I came looking for a juicing testimonial and has no idea how much more I'd gain from subscribing. Thank you for this amazing content about authenticity, identity, etc. It's truly great content broken down into terms anyone can understand and apply. 😊
Carl Jung fan, I sense. ❤
Love thie. I remember looking at a baby picture of myself when i needed to connect with my light again ❤ your message is beautiful.
Honestly, one of your best videos. The deeper, the better. Thanks so much.
damn, did you explain what I am and what I feel without knowing me? that is magic!
Thank you Clark
I was born unloved and unwanted from conception, I dnt think I've ever been my true self
Know how you feel 🫂 once my dad told me "you're a mistake"
Thank you so much for sharing ❤
Thank you for this video, Clarke. I catch myself trying to put on a persona which indeed is not me, it resembles people who maybe are better off than me financially or have acheived things i also would like to acheive. So my mind makes that connection that in order to get to that place - I have to act a certain way. Thank you for reminding me that this is not the case. Authenticity Wins everyday of the week.
Enjoyed and was inspired by your talk. I identified with what you are saying. I’m grateful you discussed this topic.
Your video gave me serious goosebumps I feel everybody needs to watch it you are amazing Clark 🤗
Thank you...for your story 🙏🏼
That was awesome!!! Loved seeing little Clark. I make and collect masks,,, says a lot about me. Thanks!
Clark your content assist me to be content. Thanks for taking the time to make these videos
thank you this really help me Keep making content
Thank you! I needed to hear this ❤
Great stuff man, please keep on the good work.
Have a lot of home videos I watch every so often and I gotta say, I don’t feel that relation whatsoever to that child me at all. Then again, childhood was difficult and I was always disassociating to feel ok
What an amazing video clark. You should
add this to metamorphic.
One day ima realize I'm as giga chad and authentic n funny n cool n stylish as you dawg. thanks for being some motivation n inspiration
Clark, youre MY role model bro
Believe it or not you are the persona for me
I think I love this video. Thank you Clark ✌🏻💖🤗😁
We are very similar it’s crazy but thanks for this video gem 💎
Unchanging but forgotten or suppressed.
Hi, Clark.
Compliment: I like you - you're a decent guy!
Only just bumped into you on UA-cam, just a few weeks ago. I now follow.
Good man. 🙂👍
It’s giving Danny from Grease
I really enjoy your videos thanks for sharing ur knowledge
I agree I think I do have ADHD.. and don’t believe in medicine either for it.
Same
Thank you brother ❤
So glad I subscribed ❤
Psychological mold 💯
I would love to see more of the kid Clark videos! 📹
Really great video Clark
I also have a similar outlook on medication, it should be used more as an last resort in my opinion. Not talking about life saving meds.
Awesome vid👍🏽👍🏽
Now that was a great thing you said about viruses and sunlight :)
love it clark
Loved the video💯
No no…at some point or age we don’t put too much stock into how we’re perceived. (I’m talking to the 40 n over club:)
I’m afraid to open up to people due to judgment and lack of self confidence. I want to be myself always. what’s the best book to read for this
I wish on day mate tony
Thank you...
How's that Scottsdale summer treating you?
You have pretty hair
GOYA is the key
Mullet?
I enjoy Clark's content because it's of high value but the switching to black and white feels unpleasant to me. Already noticed in previous videos. Solution: I only listen :D
🥰
Love Jesus brother.
Its not ok to be an abusing asshole tho. Its hard to explain to my bf how he should be himself but at the same time not be an asshole....
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