Morning, guys! Got a deep one for you today. It's been my biggest breakthrough of the last 12-months. And you can tell it's heavily influenced the content on this channel. One thing that's helped immensely has been journaling. Get the 7 Shadow Work Questions to change your life (free gift for yt subs): www.clarkkegley.com/shadow-work
Hi Clark ! Could you please make a video on healing and self esteem for people who have to start over in their mid twenties or thirties because of past depression and trauma freeze response. How do you get back the confidence ❤
I clearly remember thinking that as a child- when I'm acting and you don't like me, it's no big deal but if I risk and act like myself and you don't like me, it's devastating. Way safe to be what you want. I was forty before I finally started sorting all that out. Thank you for being awesome.
Damn, I was stuck in an 8 year shame spiral throughout my last relationship. Spent all my time having health problems, dealing with random addictions, and disassociating into video games. I spent 2 years high every single day, just trying to suppress the shame, but it'd just build up and leak out in even worse coping mechanisms. I'm 2 years out, have binged self-development to an obsessive degree, but still struggle with the self-acceptance. I've spent a lot of time isolated, and have found it hard to find people who I can be myself around -- especially after developing pretty bad shame-based social anxiety. Even though it's hard, I at least know I've been on the right path -- and I hope that I can get there one day loving myself and showing myself to the world again.
I’m self isolated, I didn’t grow up in the town where I live and I have my rights and my guilts to have boundaries so I respect the boundaries employed by other people. Finding the right environment can be a full time job , in the meantime being alone it’s not the best thing but it’s not the worst. Thanks for the content keep up the good job, best wishes from Italy
Three minutes in and this one’s already hitting hard. I can’t help but think of the many times I’ve felt this exact way, flinching at the thought of others peering into my vulnerability. Massive props for describing such a specific and hurtful aspect of the self.
Be Authentic. Tell yourself the truth and stop lying to yourself- then accept yourself- flaws and all. You are totally deserving of life and attaining what it is and becoming who you want to be.The person who deserves everything you want. You are NOT PERFECT and YOU DONT HAVE TO BE. People can 100% change and NO ONE IS EXPECTING YOU TO CHANGE OVERNIGHT. Thats perfectionisim. You can have all you want and desire- (BE PATIENT) with yourself and your growth its not a race and its not a competition! OLD YOU VS BECOMIN YOU! that's IT! no one else is running your race trust me- no one who is healed wants your life. NO ONE HEALED. So you can focus on you and your growth. give yourself credit, every day you stay sober GREAT! give yourself credit and if you mess up no big deal don't beat yourself up. No one is perfect and your not and its fine. No one wants to be perfect that's just completely made up. Be yourself If people don't want to rock with you- that's cool they don't have to- that's not under your control 0% Move into the uncomfortable parts more- exposure therapy Your not perfect and that's cool- no one else is either Dont compare yourself to anyone- your life is YOUR race, movie, car, road etc 100% your's write your own script. map that makes you genuinely happy trust yourself give yourself approval- stop looking for outside validation its cheap anyone can change- you don't have to "be" the same person forever even if the people around you want you to stay the same. Stop talking about what your going to do- especially if the people want you to stay the same because it benefits them. you are worthy of life and happiness You are in control of yourself and your emotions emotions= outcome
It's so true (and it took me forever to figure this out)-self-acceptance before self-help. Self-help can ironically just add to the shame, because it is easy to believe there is something 'wrong' to be fixed. Such a refreshing video. Thanks!
I spend most of my free time fishing at isolated places, preferring to spend time with plants and animals over humans. I've got that "talking too much, trying to share too much all at once" vibe down! I can make potential friends leave faster than smelling salts can wake up a fake fainter! I'm always trying to tell people about bargains, great restaurants, good fishing spots, and other things I think will help them, but cramming so much in one convo bewilders and confuses them. I wish I could stop, but I can't talk to who I live with (my husband and adult daughter). Edit: added first sentence
Deeply resonates! Thank you for putting the right meaning on the right words. "Toxic" shame as what you willfully inflict yourself (mostly for no tangible reason at all) & "toxic" shame for the weight people make you bear on their behalf ( & for their own sake). Once you become aware which is which & which one matters the most to your life, you WIN. Not an easy fight but certainly worth trying!
I'm sorry you had to go through that yet extremely grateful that you did cause your experience is going to help so many people including me. Thank you!
Wow, this video was eye-opening! It taught me that a lot of us feel like we need to put on a different persona to be accepted, but really, being true to ourselves is what matters. I never realized how much shame and self-isolation can harm us in the long run. Escaping to fantasy or using social media personas can prevent us from living authentically. It was interesting to learn how self-improvement alone isn't enough without self-acceptance. I think focusing on healing and surrounding ourselves with people who appreciate us for who we are is key. Thanks for such a deep dive into a topic that often gets overlooked!
Right thoughts come at the right time. I really like the timing of the topics and videos, Clark. The part about "false self" and the trend of masculinity movement (alpha male) really resonated with myself, because two years ago I've tried something like that and find out that it made me more miserable then stronger. Getting from scaried puppy to hungry lion is damn long way (maybe even impossible). Anyway - I've found also, that self-heal is the path and I can say, videos like yours are really helpful on that path. It's just another checkpoint that the path is right. All the best!
I’ve learned not everyone has to like me, and it’s okay if they don’t. I accept that. Additionally, I’ve also learned that most of the time I also don’t like those who don’t like me! Why? We don’t connect. We don’t agree on what I consider really important values or priorities. And that’s okay too! 👍
Such a great video. And just a shout out to what you've said before, bro: "The answers are already inside you" - listening to this and your previous similar video confirmed that. I just stopped consuming and decided to recede a bit and up my focus on what's important to me right now. Doing that has brought so much peace and productivity back into my life, as opposed to trying to uphold what I think I should be like or what I should be doing to be accepted by society. Community is important and i'd be nowhere without it, but after seeking council and getting support from them, only You can take the necessary action to live your life the way you truly want to. Love your videos Clark!!! Thank you for the reminders and inspiration.
Thanks for the great content you always share in your videos Clark, I have seen 2 hour podcast and don’t get as much valuable information as I do on your 15-20 minute vids. Plus the way you explain complex and deep subjects in such an easy to understand way it’s fascinating.
Escapism is a form of dissociation which is a form of the sympathetic nervous freeze response. Nervous system dysregulation needs to be addressed before the shame. You can’t function optimally unless your nervous system is regulated and that takes a lot of time
you have to do your mistakes, your failures and only then you can understand something...First Step do what you love... second step fail in a big way ... Short story ... I became successful in learning at the university... Because I learned non-stop... Second step, II became very ill, near death experience ... When I came back to live... I wanted my life differently My life should be the sum of happiness' instead to be successful for every price... You see mistakes are necessary!
Hey man, I just want to say that I've been really enjoying your channel and your content. I found your channel about 2 weeks ago now, and it has truly made a difference -- I think it's been helping me snap out of some fog that I've been in for quite some time. This video in particular really struck a chord with me, so I wanted to take the time to leave a comment and say thanks. There is something very genuine and relatable to the content you put out and it's quite refreshing.
Thank you for this video❤ Spot on with the alcohol... I used to have it because of my anxiety in some social interactions. And one day I realized I don't know how I truly am when I am vulnerable or when I just ... am. I did not recognize myself anymore. So I stopped, although I liked who I was when I was tipsy, I like myself more boring, not funny and chill sometimes!
Yeah you were right, I do feel called out by most of this video....still, depending on how complex the rooted issues within you are (god forbid you don't even remember exact details), knowing where to start with your self healing can be extremely challenging. Still a great video though!
Fear stemming from Unhealed Trauma (of any kind) pervades insidiously like an animal sensitive to its imminent slaughter. CBT as a replacement habit helps one climb out of the hole & consequent baby steps in the journey towards Self Mastery 📈 🤸♂️
What the hell I just searched this very specific topic for the first time yesterday and watched a video another Channel , and today I see you posted this yesterday as well. Meaning you posted this video at the same time I searched this topic for the first time. I had to read your title twice 😂
I would also like to add, don't give up on finding someone who will accept who you are simply because you have not found them yet and have lost relationships because of it. But in order to find the right person, you need to be open and honest about who you are from the beginning. It doesn't mean that you have to announce it to the world, but you at least have to be honest with the people that you hope to develop love with.
I like your videos, no bullshit strait to the point, lots of resonance of truth. B u t, one thing I don't like is recommending a specific type of therapy without a warning that is: It's the therapeutic relationship that helps, not the therapy itself, so having a good match is paramont, regardless of the type of therapy. My experience is most therapy don't work because there's not enough emphasis on finding a good dynamic (relationship) between the therapist and the patient, and it's just like a romantic relationship you're going to have to be very vulnerable, most people won't be a good fit for that even if they are therapist. You pay a therapist to help you specifically, you don't pay a therapist because they are good at helping everybody.
It's not about showing weakness. It's more about the fact that people are way softer than they should be. Show weakness sometimes, just don't make it something you are too comfortable with.
You know the saying. When one quits drinking. When you wake up in the morning you know that’s the best you are going to feel all day. Been almost 2 years. I remember the day I quit, I just decided to stop. It was like I turned off a switch, BAM! The desire was gone. Even thinking about taking a drink of alcohol makes me nauseous. In my mind I now equivocate alcohol with being sick. Unfortunately, it was at age 60.
This is really sad to say but your comment about our mums knowing the real us really upset me. My entire family didn’t and still doesn’t know who I truly am. Hell, I don’t at 46 have a clue. What I do know is we often become what those around us want us to be, especially when we depended on those around us for our survival. I ok, so I do have some clue who I am, but that is a recent development.
I hear you. My mother is the reason I developed a persona in the first place. She never accepted who I was, she only saw me failing at what she wanted me to be.
I love your videos so much! Such important messages and tools for self reflection. Your videos are very helpful and you seem like such a genuine relatable person. Please know you are appreciated!
Very Interesting Clark, especially with the Red Pill part, which I’ve been thru and I still see in my friends! Constant need for validation of women which just feeds their wrong/fake persona/ego!
I forgot to post a comment yesterday but I’ve watched this video twice the whole way through and I wrote two journal posts about it. Love your videos anyway but this may be one of the best ✌🏻👌
And I’m sitting here trying to figure out how to create a better public face because my private face and public face are basically the same and people are put off by the lack of “social persona.” 😅
Not everyone is afforded the same freedom to build a life at home that they don’t wish to escape from. My entry into self healing has put me in more isolation than I thought would have been good (that I would have ever thought had a purpose). I’m just starting to come out of hiding. The people that I don’t have to hide around are very few and far between as the nature of my recent change has been leaving my faith community. Maybe this is where my experience is subtly different or a slight different order than your description? I’m interested in seeking therapy that might help with RTS. Thanks for all your journaling encouragement! Helps everyday!
The title is already speaking about my problem here when I'm about to go to sleep.. different timezone.. Clark 😊 anyhow i will always rewatch your videos. 🎉🎉You have great 6sense in making videos. I guess that's the reason i subscribe or start watching you during pandemic lol
Sorry , bringing in the introvert is just toxic shame doesn’t fit - 😂 people who are extroverted gain energy being around people, introverts lose energy being around people - has nothing to do with shame or authenticity 😂 it sounds like you’re saying that all introverts are just ashamed to be themselves? People exhaust me, always have - any other introverts here ??
haha yes, 100%. The shame for me got triggered after spending years thinking something was wrong with me for not constantly wanting to be around people. It's almost impossible to make any sort of spiritual progress being around others all the time, especially in the beginning stages. We've known and appreciated this forever...it's why monastic traditions, cloisters, and the entire concept of spiritual retreat exist. I'm giving him the benefit of the doubt, I guess, and assuming he's making a legitimate point around balance or discernment. Even the most committed introverts need to come down from the mountain and reenter village life sometimes. Sub optimal framing though for sure.
he didn't say it was the only option but that some people misidentified as introverts because they get tired by putting on a false persona, not bc of actual introversion.
It is very difficult to recognize that our parents do not accept us, when that is the socially normative assumption associated with their role. We need to believe, as kids, that they are stable and okay, because our survival depends on that. Many never fully recognize how conditional that love actually was, at home. People want to believe that if you are in contact with your mom, that she is checking in, and actually cares how you are doing. If she doesnt? We get off the lhone feeling drained. Fully believing we are introverted. It is very difficult to find a safe enough person while buying into this "not enough" paradigm.
hi clark do you have any videos or any advise on Dealing with Emasculation trauma and how to heal one’s masculinity from being emasculated , would be grateful if possible thankyou.
Morning, guys! Got a deep one for you today. It's been my biggest breakthrough of the last 12-months. And you can tell it's heavily influenced the content on this channel. One thing that's helped immensely has been journaling. Get the 7 Shadow Work Questions to change your life (free gift for yt subs): www.clarkkegley.com/shadow-work
Hi Clark ! Could you please make a video on healing and self esteem for people who have to start over in their mid twenties or thirties because of past depression and trauma freeze response. How do you get back the confidence ❤
@@inese917 @14:50 🙂
I clearly remember thinking that as a child- when I'm acting and you don't like me, it's no big deal but if I risk and act like myself and you don't like me, it's devastating. Way safe to be what you want. I was forty before I finally started sorting all that out. Thank you for being awesome.
That so resonates. Thank you
Damn, I was stuck in an 8 year shame spiral throughout my last relationship. Spent all my time having health problems, dealing with random addictions, and disassociating into video games. I spent 2 years high every single day, just trying to suppress the shame, but it'd just build up and leak out in even worse coping mechanisms. I'm 2 years out, have binged self-development to an obsessive degree, but still struggle with the self-acceptance. I've spent a lot of time isolated, and have found it hard to find people who I can be myself around -- especially after developing pretty bad shame-based social anxiety. Even though it's hard, I at least know I've been on the right path -- and I hope that I can get there one day loving myself and showing myself to the world again.
Going from self improvement to self acceptance and (then love) is where I'm at- appreciate how you break this down!
I’m so proud of you 🎉being sober almost 1000 days.
I’m self isolated, I didn’t grow up in the town where I live and I have my rights and my guilts to have boundaries so I respect the boundaries employed by other people. Finding the right environment can be a full time job , in the meantime being alone it’s not the best thing but it’s not the worst. Thanks for the content keep up the good job, best wishes from Italy
@jeremyross7939 It’s natural , even Tom Hanks and Keanu Reeves have haters and surely don’t like everybody
Three minutes in and this one’s already hitting hard. I can’t help but think of the many times I’ve felt this exact way, flinching at the thought of others peering into my vulnerability. Massive props for describing such a specific and hurtful aspect of the self.
Be Authentic. Tell yourself the truth and stop lying to yourself- then accept yourself- flaws and all. You are totally deserving of life and attaining what it is and becoming who you want to be.The person who deserves everything you want. You are NOT PERFECT and YOU DONT HAVE TO BE. People can 100% change and NO ONE IS EXPECTING YOU TO CHANGE OVERNIGHT. Thats perfectionisim. You can have all you want and desire- (BE PATIENT) with yourself and your growth its not a race and its not a competition! OLD YOU VS BECOMIN YOU! that's IT! no one else is running your race trust me- no one who is healed wants your life. NO ONE HEALED. So you can focus on you and your growth. give yourself credit, every day you stay sober GREAT! give yourself credit and if you mess up no big deal don't beat yourself up. No one is perfect and your not and its fine. No one wants to be perfect that's just completely made up.
Be yourself
If people don't want to rock with you- that's cool they don't have to- that's not under your control 0%
Move into the uncomfortable parts more- exposure therapy
Your not perfect and that's cool- no one else is either
Dont compare yourself to anyone- your life is YOUR race, movie, car, road etc 100% your's write your own script. map that makes you genuinely happy
trust yourself give yourself approval- stop looking for outside validation its cheap
anyone can change- you don't have to "be" the same person forever even if the people around you want you to stay the same.
Stop talking about what your going to do- especially if the people want you to stay the same because it benefits them.
you are worthy of life and happiness
You are in control of yourself and your emotions emotions= outcome
So this channel/video is your way of self healing. You just exposed your inner child, congratulation on your courage.
It's so true (and it took me forever to figure this out)-self-acceptance before self-help. Self-help can ironically just add to the shame, because it is easy to believe there is something 'wrong' to be fixed. Such a refreshing video. Thanks!
I spend most of my free time fishing at isolated places, preferring to spend time with plants and animals over humans. I've got that "talking too much, trying to share too much all at once" vibe down! I can make potential friends leave faster than smelling salts can wake up a fake fainter! I'm always trying to tell people about bargains, great restaurants, good fishing spots, and other things I think will help them, but cramming so much in one convo bewilders and confuses them. I wish I could stop, but I can't talk to who I live with (my husband and adult daughter). Edit: added first sentence
Deeply resonates! Thank you for putting the right meaning on the right words. "Toxic" shame as what you willfully inflict yourself (mostly for no tangible reason at all) & "toxic" shame for the weight people make you bear on their behalf ( & for their own sake). Once you become aware which is which & which one matters the most to your life, you WIN. Not an easy fight but certainly worth trying!
I'm sorry you had to go through that yet extremely grateful that you did cause your experience is going to help so many people including me. Thank you!
I always deemed myself as not good enough. I only recently realised it's labeled shame... Amazing video !
Wow, this video was eye-opening! It taught me that a lot of us feel like we need to put on a different persona to be accepted, but really, being true to ourselves is what matters. I never realized how much shame and self-isolation can harm us in the long run. Escaping to fantasy or using social media personas can prevent us from living authentically. It was interesting to learn how self-improvement alone isn't enough without self-acceptance. I think focusing on healing and surrounding ourselves with people who appreciate us for who we are is key. Thanks for such a deep dive into a topic that often gets overlooked!
This is so incredibly spot-on where I was for 30 years. Someone special opened my eyes to my state and now healing and growing.
Right thoughts come at the right time.
I really like the timing of the topics and videos, Clark.
The part about "false self" and the trend of masculinity movement (alpha male) really resonated with myself, because two years ago I've tried something like that and find out that it made me more miserable then stronger. Getting from scaried puppy to hungry lion is damn long way (maybe even impossible).
Anyway - I've found also, that self-heal is the path and I can say, videos like yours are really helpful on that path. It's just another checkpoint that the path is right.
All the best!
I’ve learned not everyone has to like me, and it’s okay if they don’t. I accept that. Additionally, I’ve also learned that most of the time I also don’t like those who don’t like me! Why? We don’t connect. We don’t agree on what I consider really important values or priorities. And that’s okay too! 👍
Thank you for existing and genuinely wanting to help people. And effectively accomplishing it. Huge impact
Such a great video. And just a shout out to what you've said before, bro: "The answers are already inside you" - listening to this and your previous similar video confirmed that. I just stopped consuming and decided to recede a bit and up my focus on what's important to me right now. Doing that has brought so much peace and productivity back into my life, as opposed to trying to uphold what I think I should be like or what I should be doing to be accepted by society. Community is important and i'd be nowhere without it, but after seeking council and getting support from them, only You can take the necessary action to live your life the way you truly want to. Love your videos Clark!!! Thank you for the reminders and inspiration.
Thanks for the great content you always share in your videos Clark, I have seen 2 hour podcast and don’t get as much valuable information as I do on your 15-20 minute vids. Plus the way you explain complex and deep subjects in such an easy to understand way it’s fascinating.
Thank you so much for doing this video! You have such an amazing way to dig into those scary areas to help all of us heal.
Love Dr Bradshaw’s book, healing the shame that binds you, deepest healing I’ve experienced, this video gives a nice snapshot of it.
I only found your channel just now and I looove all the chart videos! Just blows my mind how accurate they are. Incredible content.
Really enjoyed this. The clarity is priceless. Thank you. 👍
Escapism is a form of dissociation which is a form of the sympathetic nervous freeze response. Nervous system dysregulation needs to be addressed before the shame. You can’t function optimally unless your nervous system is regulated and that takes a lot of time
you have to do your mistakes, your failures and only then you can understand something...First Step do what you love... second step fail in a big way ... Short story ... I became successful in learning at the university... Because I learned non-stop... Second step, II became very ill, near death experience ... When I came back to live... I wanted my life differently My life should be the sum of happiness' instead to be successful for every price... You see mistakes are necessary!
Clark just so you know you are absolutely not too much. Your personality is what keeps me coming. The content is good too ;)
🛸🛸🛸As a therapist, I agree 100%. Love your content Clark! Keep it coming! xoxo
Hey man, I just want to say that I've been really enjoying your channel and your content. I found your channel about 2 weeks ago now, and it has truly made a difference -- I think it's been helping me snap out of some fog that I've been in for quite some time. This video in particular really struck a chord with me, so I wanted to take the time to leave a comment and say thanks. There is something very genuine and relatable to the content you put out and it's quite refreshing.
Hate when it turns into behavior that actually gives people good reason to leave you.
Thank you for this video❤
Spot on with the alcohol... I used to have it because of my anxiety in some social interactions. And one day I realized I don't know how I truly am when I am vulnerable or when I just ... am. I did not recognize myself anymore. So I stopped, although I liked who I was when I was tipsy, I like myself more boring, not funny and chill sometimes!
Wow! - Yes, holy sh@3! Thank you for making this - really hits home and news to me on many levels.
Yeah you were right, I do feel called out by most of this video....still, depending on how complex the rooted issues within you are (god forbid you don't even remember exact details), knowing where to start with your self healing can be extremely challenging. Still a great video though!
Great video. Want to hear more about the boringness of sobriety and working through it. Thanks!!
Fear stemming from Unhealed Trauma (of any kind) pervades insidiously like an animal sensitive to its imminent slaughter.
CBT as a replacement habit helps one climb out of the hole & consequent baby steps in the journey towards Self Mastery 📈 🤸♂️
Thanks for making this video. It's spot on. I have watched it three times now.
I always love your videos. Thank you!
What the hell I just searched this very specific topic for the first time yesterday and watched a video another Channel , and today I see you posted this yesterday as well. Meaning you posted this video at the same time I searched this topic for the first time. I had to read your title twice 😂
I would also like to add, don't give up on finding someone who will accept who you are simply because you have not found them yet and have lost relationships because of it. But in order to find the right person, you need to be open and honest about who you are from the beginning. It doesn't mean that you have to announce it to the world, but you at least have to be honest with the people that you hope to develop love with.
I like your videos, no bullshit strait to the point, lots of resonance of truth. B u t, one thing I don't like is recommending a specific type of therapy without a warning that is: It's the therapeutic relationship that helps, not the therapy itself, so having a good match is paramont, regardless of the type of therapy. My experience is most therapy don't work because there's not enough emphasis on finding a good dynamic (relationship) between the therapist and the patient, and it's just like a romantic relationship you're going to have to be very vulnerable, most people won't be a good fit for that even if they are therapist. You pay a therapist to help you specifically, you don't pay a therapist because they are good at helping everybody.
I love your videos, I discovered your channel yesterday. You are my inspiration
People are intuitive usually and can see right through fake people. We all really just rave real people, flaws an all
I love you for making this and doing it on a whiteboard at that
I always love the focus on self healing on this channel. ❤
Clark, I'm going to have to make you my guru. You're on point brother
It's not about showing weakness.
It's more about the fact that people are way softer than they should be.
Show weakness sometimes, just don't make it something you are too comfortable with.
This was amazing 😍
Thank you for coloring in the chart. 😂
You know the saying. When one quits drinking. When you wake up in the morning you know that’s the best you are going to feel all day. Been almost 2 years. I remember the day I quit, I just decided to stop. It was like I turned off a switch, BAM! The desire was gone. Even thinking about taking a drink of alcohol makes me nauseous. In my mind I now equivocate alcohol with being sick. Unfortunately, it was at age 60.
This is really sad to say but your comment about our mums knowing the real us really upset me. My entire family didn’t and still doesn’t know who I truly am. Hell, I don’t at 46 have a clue. What I do know is we often become what those around us want us to be, especially when we depended on those around us for our survival.
I ok, so I do have some clue who I am, but that is a recent development.
It's been my experience that the quickest way to know oneself is to find the pieces that you hide the most from others out of fear of judgement.
I hear you. My mother is the reason I developed a persona in the first place. She never accepted who I was, she only saw me failing at what she wanted me to be.
I love your videos so much! Such important messages and tools for self reflection. Your videos are very helpful and you seem like such a genuine relatable person. Please know you are appreciated!
This really hit home. Thank you!!!
Very Interesting Clark, especially with the Red Pill part, which I’ve been thru and I still see in my friends! Constant need for validation of women which just feeds their wrong/fake persona/ego!
Thank you for all your videos , you are helping me so much ! This is definitely one of your best videos for me !
This video is brilliant Clark!
Great video. I really needed this
I forgot to post a comment yesterday but I’ve watched this video twice the whole way through and I wrote two journal posts about it. Love your videos anyway but this may be one of the best ✌🏻👌
Clark that was solid thank you. keep on keeping on !
This was very helpful. Love your charts and explanation ❤
I spend 6 days a week alone and I like it .. 😮
And I’m sitting here trying to figure out how to create a better public face because my private face and public face are basically the same and people are put off by the lack of “social persona.” 😅
4:50 except my mom is why I’m like this
this video just came in time, thanks bro
Video is awesome and it made me realise a hell out of things which i need to fix for myself in order make my life halpier ❤
Awesome clark, it's really deep and insightful thank you my friend ❤❤
Damn Clark didn't expect a new video so early this morning, great work
Not everyone is afforded the same freedom to build a life at home that they don’t wish to escape from.
My entry into self healing has put me in more isolation than I thought would have been good (that I would have ever thought had a purpose).
I’m just starting to come out of hiding.
The people that I don’t have to hide around are very few and far between as the nature of my recent change has been leaving my faith community. Maybe this is where my experience is subtly different or a slight different order than your description?
I’m interested in seeking therapy that might help with RTS.
Thanks for all your journaling encouragement! Helps everyday!
Nailed it! Appreciate your videos!
Ur videos r so good thank u Clark ur so easy to understand and it hits so hard really enjoy ur channel find myself coming back and coming back
Great video thank you!!
I can relate. I’m so sorry about your childhood. Like actually
Awesome video!
Amazing. Right on time!
much appreciated Clark.
clicked the like button when you mentioned your sobriety. never stop mentioning it
Clark as always bangerrr🤍🩵
The title is already speaking about my problem here when I'm about to go to sleep.. different timezone.. Clark 😊 anyhow i will always rewatch your videos. 🎉🎉You have great 6sense in making videos. I guess that's the reason i subscribe or start watching you during pandemic lol
Amazing thank you
Great content, so glad I found your Chanel
🔥 thank you for all you do! 💜
Thank you 🦚 🦋 🌻 peace and joy
love the info!!
first!! love your videos!
So much knowlege in one video!
awsome, thanks clark 👏
Love this! Thanks!
God bless you dear Im starting 2understand what I&other people espcly woman going tru
Sorry , bringing in the introvert is just toxic shame doesn’t fit - 😂 people who are extroverted gain energy being around people, introverts lose energy being around people - has nothing to do with shame or authenticity 😂 it sounds like you’re saying that all introverts are just ashamed to be themselves? People exhaust me, always have - any other introverts here ??
haha yes, 100%. The shame for me got triggered after spending years thinking something was wrong with me for not constantly wanting to be around people. It's almost impossible to make any sort of spiritual progress being around others all the time, especially in the beginning stages. We've known and appreciated this forever...it's why monastic traditions, cloisters, and the entire concept of spiritual retreat exist. I'm giving him the benefit of the doubt, I guess, and assuming he's making a legitimate point around balance or discernment. Even the most committed introverts need to come down from the mountain and reenter village life sometimes. Sub optimal framing though for sure.
Introverts exhaust me, I can’t stand whenever I have to deal with them.
If you constantly tell yourself that being around people drains you then being around people will drain you. The mountain is you. 🫵🗻
I used to feel this way.. Realized I'm not introverted dipshits are draining & most ppl are dipshits
he didn't say it was the only option but that some people misidentified as introverts because they get tired by putting on a false persona, not bc of actual introversion.
Thank you Clark 🙏❤️
Love it!
Very good video thanks man
Thank you!
Very interesting,,so true
Love you Clark ✌🏻💖🤗😁
3:37 yeah. that's me after 2 years watching Hamza 😢
i kinda built body, speaking skills but still never met a girl
Woke up at 4? Already that 🔥 (have a mission to get up earlier , it will make your head clear and make you more aware a 100 %)
thank you!!
It is very difficult to recognize that our parents do not accept us, when that is the socially normative assumption associated with their role. We need to believe, as kids, that they are stable and okay, because our survival depends on that. Many never fully recognize how conditional that love actually was, at home. People want to believe that if you are in contact with your mom, that she is checking in, and actually cares how you are doing. If she doesnt? We get off the lhone feeling drained. Fully believing we are introverted. It is very difficult to find a safe enough person while buying into this "not enough" paradigm.
As an autistic person this is definetely something i resonate with
hi clark do you have any videos or any advise on Dealing with Emasculation trauma and how to heal one’s masculinity from being emasculated , would be grateful if possible thankyou.