Kyle "Guante" Tran Myhre - Ten Responses to the Phrase 'Man Up'
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- Опубліковано 25 сер 2024
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Kyle "Guante" Tran Myhre, performing at the Artists Quarter in Saint Paul, MN.
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"I want to talk to my son about something other than sports"
my heart
Just the fact that number 10 was simply "no" was the icing on the poetry cake
***** Read the youtube rules please
***** Yes. On how to not be an idiot. TEN OUTTA TEN SO ORIGINAL BEST DISS OF THE YEAR GREAT LOVELY!!
Love your homestuck picture.
Jasper Colde Love your homestuck pic-er love your pic
m
"Who defends the world from…I dunno. Feelings." Yessssssssssssss!!!!!!!!!!!
"Superman who defends the world from... I don't know.. feelings."
"Ten: ... no."
GOD I LOVE THIS POEM.
I love it too :)
This: "Why fight to remove our chains, when we can simply compare their lengths?"
6 years ago I said I would remember this video to one day show my son, should I ever have a son. Well, my son was born 6 months ago and I have come back to save it. Still so powerful.
He's not saying "men have it worse than women" he's not saying "women did this to men"... he's not pointing fingers or competing, he's saying "this is a thing that is a problem" and he doesn't even contain that "problem" to men, he touches on how it affects everyone. He did a damn good job of getting across some of the social issues men face without pointing fingers or competing or being whiny at all.
He did and this is why I like this poem
Men do have it far worse than women in general and that is simply a demonstrable fact by any measure. It was an ineffective recitation because the poet was careful and timid in his presentation and desperate not to offend female ears.
Women have used the "man up" approach to coerce and humiliate men for centuries, but this poet pretended this term is a weapon wielded by men only.
When he said that he wants to talk to his son about something other than sports, it hit me. I've never felt like I had anything in common with my dad and that while he doesn't say so or really act like it, i feel he's disappointed I didn't go out for sports in high school. I didn't take an interest in cars, or building things with my hands. I took an interest in video games, skateboarding, drawing and reading. When I got excited about something I was passionate about, I felt he wouldn't care or would only pretend at best. However, I don't blame him because he never once told me otherwise. He supported my decisions in entertainment and pastimes when I was looking for it. He still supports my decision to go to an art school and even helps me out financially when I need it to keep going to the school. He's a great dad and while we don't have much in common he did a hell of a job being one.
Or maybe his father and him can have different interests and his father respects that.
Brofessional Gamerz I don't have anything in common with my father. Parents divorced when I was born. I legitimately met my father when I was 7. I guarantee you one of the few things that we talked about was sports. The few things to this day that we talk about are sports. I hate sports but that's the only way I feel like I can talk to him. Same goes to my masculine mother, raised by her, and I still fell like all I can talk to her about is sports.
I feel ya
What is your career now My son.
I just clapped in front of computer screen.
MARINA!
can we just though, like, this is wonderful
I almost let my phone fall to clap my hands tho
I just did it too
BEST COMMENT!!!
"we teach boys how to wear the skin of a man, we also teach them how to raise that skin like a flag and draw blood for it."
isnt that a horror movie
It's so powerful to hear a man speak on the negative effects patriarchy has on men. I love this! :)
***** I'll be short, sweet and to the point--no, I am not adding to the problem. Yes, it is patriarchy...patriarchy is just another way of saying that this society is male-dominated, which it is. Why some men would do this to themselves and women? I dunno, you'd have to ask them. Have a good day! :)
Jenai H. Another NO to your Patriarchy myth. It is just a myth.
In a male-dominated society men wouldn't make up 90% of the prison population.
In a male-dominated society men wouldn't make up 90% of the homeless.
In a male-dominated society men wouldn't make up the vast majority of suicides.
In a male-dominated society it would be men who spent most of the money.
In a male-dominated society men would have reproductive rights.
In a male-dominated society men would not suffer and die to protect women.
Patriarchy is a lie, and that lie is a massive part of the problem.
***** She's probably a feminist. "Patriarchy" is the boogey-man for every deluded feminist everywhere..
MrShadowfax42 Patriarchy is not a lie. It's not a myth. I could throw some stats at you as well, but I'll put it this way: While patriarchy is a system of oppression that often benefits men and hurts women (and trans, homosexuals, etc.--anyone who doesn't fit nicely into the straight man role), there are aspects of patriarchy that hurt men as well (such as the aspect that Guante speaks about in his poem). This doesn't mean patriarchy doesn't exist, it just means that it has parts of it that are detrimental to men as well, which goes to show that patriarchy hurts everyone and gives more of a reason as to why we need to stop this system of oppression.
MrShadowfax42 Yes, I am a feminist/womanist. Oh, how I wish patriarchy was just a boogey-man! :) But unfortunately, it is very real system of oppression that affects women (and others who don't fit nicely into the straight man role) socially, politically and economically. You can spend your time fighting the people who see this system of oppression for what it is and continue to try to keep it in place, but me and others who see the truth will continue to fight for a society in which patriarchy is gone (or at least mostly) and where men don't have to feel like Guante feels. I've felt, seen and experienced the effects of patriarchy and patriarchal ideas that are held by both men and women (yes, women can have sexist and hold patriarchal ideas as well--remember these ideas are fed to our society as what is "right", so it shouldn't be surprising that quite a few women accept these ideas and perpetuate them as well), so I know it's real. Have a good day! :)
i loved that.... he clearly feels strongly about that...great to hear this from someone so visually strong....smart and talented.
This is my daughter's account, but I wanted to post. Thank you. I have used this phrase in the past while addressing my sons for exhibiting non manly responses to problems. I can assure you, through the delivery of this poem that I will never again use this term and am ashamed to have been duped into using it in the first place. Inside, all men know there are many different emotions that coexist. Some manly, some not. It is time to exhibit all of these sides instead of just the ones society expects out of us men. With your help, I feel like I am a step closer to figuring out how to raise my sons to be good men. Thanks again brother.
I'm curious what you think of as a "non-manly" response. A human response? Something with feelings, things that men possess? So strange, the way we raise our children here. In other countries, happiness rates are higher, murder rates are lower, and men aren't afraid to hug each other, or express an emotion. I dream of the day when we can embrace that here. Our sons deserve to live in a world where it's okay to cry, and okay to feel, and okay to be who they ARE, without regards to some social construct bullshit that makes them always feel *less than*, with standards that are almost impossible to meet. You left this post 3 years ago. I'm wondering how you're living up to your own expectations as a father. (Have you seen the film The Mask You Live In? I'd recommend that too, on your quest to becoming an amazing parent.) :) Good luck to you, man.
@@SilverFlame819 Um... You know most countries emphasise machismo behavior, and it's not exclusive to the US?
@@panthera5678 Yes, this planet has a problem.
"There is no light-beer in the universe full-bodied enough to make you love yourself" damn bro I know.
That was so meaningful, when i have sons in the future, i will show them this
Yes! Of course!
Did you have sons yet?
I logged in just to give this a "thumbs up". A man who can express his emotions and is willing to defy gender stereotypes is the manliest man there is. I would love to know what gives with the 23 people who disliked it; probably all guys who tell other guys to "man up" all the time.
This put tears in my eyes and fire in my veins
that must be painful
Mariell Mitlin I was impressed by this comment until I saw yours- then I just snorted
FUCK. YES. I literally started applauding and I am sitting in the middle of my school cafeteria. This is absolutely phenomenal from the first line to the last.
What’s that smell
#10 is immensely powerful. It is the briefest and at the same time underlines, justifies and emphasizes #1-9.
So killer. Snaps for days for this poem. "Man up" and "no homo" and so many other ignorant sayings get overlooked because they've been worked into our society's vocabulary and it's "just a saying" and "I didn't mean it that way"... but this poem rectifies all that. Thank you for this.
I'm actually female and I've been hoping I'd man up for a few years but I think I'm going to go to a doctor about my depression, this is an old video but your poetry has touched me thank you.
may you find the help you need and never have to "arm wrestle your way out of chemical depression." ;) Also, may you, like all people every, always be loved.
For the men out there, who are sick of being told 'Man Up'
I usually hear it when men do anything not considered 'manly' or does not fit the social stereotype of what a man should be.
Never heard it in relation to laziness yet
10. Was that a simple "No"? Can't hear what he's saying...
In my experience, it's always been more along the lines of what ***** said. More take care of your responsibilities, less crush beer cans on your forehead. And that's how I've always used it too.
I have always heard it in relation to the failure to fulfill responsibilities you have taken on, like Omar outlined.
I've mostly heard it when one guy sets expectations for another. These expectations may be reasonable or not. They may be life-affirming or not. In any case, they are not what they person being told to "man up" has chosen. It can be peer pressure or bullying. It can be setting high standards or low. In any case, though, the message is that the only way to be a "real man" is to conform to someone else's expectations.
I'm gonna be that mum to show all my favourite poems to my children
I dont ever hear "man up', but I've heard "be a man." then I get swift as a coursing river. With all the force of a great typhoon, all the strength of a raging fire, and mysterious as the dark side of the moon.
"Why fight to remove our chains when we can simply compare their lengths?"
This is so deep
i don't understand the meaning of this sentence, could you explain please?
@@Juliacpt I think it means: why bother to help each other with whatever binds us, may it be struggles or difficulties, if we could just stupidly compare who's got it worse, who's got it better, who has handled it better, or who has the better capacity. Something like that. :)
I respect this so much. I love the message, and I like how he's speaking up in a way that doesn't put another cause down, but instead lifts each of them up as equals... even as he specifically makes his case known and tangible.
Manning up has male suicide at 4 times the rate of female suicide. Manning up has boys still being mutilated at birth. Manning up is used both in ways to get angry at a well spoken opinionated woman, and also to keep men in this man box that says "I'm invincible to pain, I'm invincible to feeling" - and it's this latter one that I see both men and women throwing at men. Nice poem.
Gosh, I got chills. Amazing.
Whoa, I got chills at the end. Such conviction. Bravo good sir, bravo.
I've listened to this countless times since it got posted, and every time, without fail, I get goose bumps and a sting in my eye.
"Man up." . . . "No."
That explosion you just heard was my mind blowing up.
I love this. Raising a boy towards manhood, my voice has to be louder than the streets. I think this video sunk into his mind last night. Thanks!
Yep
see www.avoiceformen.com
I love this poem. I feel recognised when I hear it.
I just wanted to say to you, Guante, that you have been an inspiration to me for years. I listen to your poetry and music on a weekly basis for years now. This poem, in particular, relates to me and has helped and kept me going in a world that doesn't understand me. My father is one of these manly men, and I thought for the first 21 years of my life that that is what I had to be. But fuck that. Thank you, you change the world, you're a voice that combats the darkness. Thanks dude. I wish I could repay yah. Tears
This guy is not manly because he said such true words, he is just human. I will try to never use the words manly again because if I would say he´s manly because he is acting against all this "man up"- bullshit, I feel like I would ruin the whole concept. Like I would verify that he indeed is acting manly while acting manly is so cliche it hurts. He acts like a decent fucking person with feelings and the way he spoke was beautiful and I hope there will be more guys like this out there.
such irony
Teresa Undead Thank you
Jacob Meinert no problem
"Man up" is one of the worst fucking phrases in the world. It makes me angry beyond belief, and saddens me immensely. I thoroughly enjoyed this one, thank you!!
I can't stand that term either was said to me a few times just because I lost a family member and I cried
@@DaveTravelsinTime Toxic masculinity at its finest. So many men being taught to hide their humanity, and then we wonder why so many men are emotionally stunted and can't show their feelings.
@@SilverFlame819 thanks silver same to you
Will check out the documentary soon
You were brilliant. Some of the comments I've read below only serve to prove your point further. There is an ingrained emotional illiteracy that ruins people. Humanity needs more voices like yours. Thanks.
It's like there is a thousand words worth of genius subtext to every single word that this wonderful poet expresses. I am so thankful for button poetry, I consider these amazing and unconventionally deep, insightful artists to be the most honest and compassionate philosophers and psychologists of our time.Talented beyond a justified description of how much. Button poetry has opened my eyes to what truly matters in our society, thank you for opening people's minds and offering such opportunities to different walks of live's empathies, for us to understand and relate to.
11. When I hear "Man Up!", I've started looking around for the "Man Down!"
The amount of perfection in this mans words is unbelievable.
This was very refreshing. Thanks for sharing.
I haven't loved a poem in a few years like I do this.
This is the most fantastic call-out of toxic masculinity I have ever seen in my life. This showcases all the reasons why misogyny and sexism hurts men as well. I love this so much.
The beginning and the end of the poem just gives me chills. The simplicity of the one or two word phrases holds so much power and weight to them
A glass clink and a toast for all of those who *are* who they are. Nicely done.
I will never say 'Man Up' again. Thank you for increasing my vocabulary!
Oh my word. I love that this is a man speaking on the pressures and stereotypes placed on genders in society. Women can speak on it all they want, but how often are we said to be over exaggerating? Obviously we aren't. He gets it. Wow I love this.
And this is exactly why you shouldn't use the phrase "man up" for a boy or man and "don't be such a bitch" for a girl or woman. The first teaches a man that he can't be vulnerable or have human emotions, let alone show it. The latter teaches a woman that she can't be assertive or strong willed, having to dumb herself down and become submissive for everyone to like her.
I have worked under many female bosses who were assertive and strong willed, and they were never once called bitches for this. Females on staff who backstabbed, belittled and humiliated their co workers were branded bitches, quite appropriately.
"Man up" on the other hand, is an expression used mostly by women, to shame men and boys into doing something which will benefit them {the woman).
I have a lot for this guy. It reminded of the relationship I have with my older brother. We never really talked anything other then girls, sex and clothes.
I thank you for this
This. This is what I've been feeling my whole life.
Really does bring out those who haven't overcome the devastation done to boys in adolescence and childhood--often by their own emotionally dysfunctional fathers. This was truly beauitful....those of you who think "man up" is about taking responsibility--just the opposite. An excuse and rationalization to NOT take responsibility for one's own emotional life and one's relationship with others.
It is seven years later and the world has still not learned the lesson. We are improving, but not much has changed.
I thought I'd find comments from sensible people, you know the ones who admit that society is fucked up. Then I remembered that this is UA-cam.
This is absolutely the perfect response to someone saying "man up."
Thank you for this art and for shaping men and boys to know that their gender does not define what role they may have!!! LOVE!
"Man up" does have some viable use, mainly in telling a man to find his stupidity in the face of fear to reap the courage that it can provide in action, but having said that this piece of poetry points that out, and much better than I currently am. Very good piece of socially relevant poetry.
How has this got no comments yet?! I was expecting praise and fierce debate.
This poem is amazing. Perfect. Thought-provoking. Challenging. Beautiful.
This oem is beyond exceptional...i just wish i could find more men that are "man enough" to know when to 'man up' and when tobe real... x
Your poetry is great. I want to share with my students, except they are in middle school. They are in middle school at a private Jesuit (Catholic) school for poor Latinx kids. The senior staff is very strict about manners and no cussing (and rightly so to a degree).
Could you label your Safe for School/Work, works?
Hey Matthew! Check out our classroom-friendly poems playlist: ua-cam.com/play/PLC5PJtWBigV2f4TM4Gx7IlPe1ummqg5jt.html
Hi Matthew, I think this would be great to show to students. I plan to show it to my son as well when he can understand it more.
Have you brought this to senior staff and try to push it's positive message?
FreshnessFactor They have a playlist of material, Button Poetry does, that is like this but no cussing. Channel Mods. sent it to me.
You are right though. Will push it after I befriend my senior staff members a little better.
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Matthew Abely Poetry has the artistic license to "cuss", regardless of what kind of school you're in. Freedom of expression is a Constitutional law, and even private schools still have to follow the Constitution. If your superiors have something wrong with this, then they can be fined and possibly fired for preventing you to show it in class. All in all, you are completely SAFE to present this great piece in class.
YES.
Excellent poem, excellent statements. Society largely ignores the struggles of men and doesn't give the same leniency,budget spending/support structures to men when they need help. Men are just as human as women and feel emotion just as much as women.
Great job!
Don't forget frustrated Dads/Moms/parents that wanted a son but got a daughter and then proceed to raise her as if she was a boy, telling her to man up, making it impossible to talk about emotions with them etc. Happens too, just like the opposite happens (having a son when parents wanted a girl).
this gives me shivers everytime i hear it and that doesn't happen often. thank you.
Patriarchy negatively affects both women AND men. When will people come to realize that? Props to this guy.
Ça me convient très bien perso. Évitez de parler au nom de tous.
Albert Wesker Oh my bad, i should have specified that i meant patriarchy negatively affects people who actually give a shit about human rights and equality. Obviously that excludes people like you. How naive of me to assume such a position without thinking twice.
There are a lot of ignorant people here, but this video is amazing. I actually was sobbing. It meant so much to me that he gets this. This poem is beautiful
Yes, bring it Brother! This is the "Man Up" that is spreading and will change the world. We need this now more than ever!
7 and up made me tear up, I'm not going to lie.
Wow. I think I've just discovered a love for poetry.
Regardless of whether you like or dislike the poem, one wonderful fact about this video is that it has closed captioning available. While I personally love the poem, and this it is an excellent stand for gender equality, it is also important to note that the addition of captions opens the poem to the hard of hearing and to the Deaf community. Yes! Button Poetry, you made an excellent step here. How about adding captions to all of your videos?
He has a very powerful personality and I love watching his work
Brilliant and powerful.
I've barely ever been told man up by a man. I've been told pretty often, thanks to my voice and my love to dramatize hard. (It takes a king to be a queen!)
"Men should, men need to, when will men...."
You can't fight against a term like man up then turn and say shit like "men need to",
Men, are vulnerable with each other, especially in men only settings. If you've been in a men only scenario and never felt that then you have shitty freinds or you enter the dynamic with a chip on your shoulder or a preconceived notion of what "vulnerable" SHOULD look like.
Love it, That phrase pisses me off to a degree.
by 10 i had tears in my eyes
exceptional work
wish they showed poetry like this in my school 😐 might have liked poetry a lot earlier on 😂
i said this up in the comments, planning to read this poem at my (conservative private) highschool for all-school assembly. never be afraid to bring world-changing poetry to places where people need to hear it ;)
aishacheach I'm afraid to tell anyone in my school other than a few teachers that we should do this because people will laugh at me😂
I'm not in school anymore haha I do remember when they asked us to bring a piece of poetry in for homework some years ago
aishacheach they showed this to me in school im in 7th grade xD
At a certain point during this video I fell in love with the words coming out and the body language supporting it. People tend to forget about the role men are pushed into, about how without "real men" a lot of people would be happier or even alive.
Thank you so much for shining a light on a society that puts more value in the Myth of "A Man" than the worth of a "Human Being". I'll use the phrase "Man Up" the same day, the proof of a man is his honesty, his integrity, his compassion, his dignity, his vulnerability, his courage, his love, his willingness to throw himself body and soul at life, in the charge forward to wake up today more human than he did yesterday.
This is fantastic.
I think I'll just stay out of the comments section this time. Dipped my toe in. Don't want to go any farther. This poem made me very happy. Keep on keepin' on :)
Thank you for doing this. I'm sharing it cause wow, what you said is so sweet. Lovin it!
I literally love this poem so much omg
I am so grateful for your brain this I've showed this piece to everyone! The way you think gives me hope for humanity thank you so much guante
Guante's poem is absolutely beautiful and very well done. Great piece of work!
If somebody told me to "man up", I'd probably only give them blank stares. I may be male, but I'm not masculine at all, and I don't understand why I should be, just because I've got a penis. I have no use for masculinity, it's not part of my personality. But then again, I'm androgynous and don't really understand all this feminine-masculine stuff.
I agree, and I feel like men are taught to hate being men. Man up, since you can't do anything that isn't aggressive or ape like. Everything does this, but men "can't be victims." I don't know, may not be a shared opinion.
To each their own I suppose, I enjoy masculinity; being rough and direct with my manner of speech with those I hold dear, playing with my younger(and bigger) brother by doing shoulder checks. I do feminine things with the same vigor, like baking better than most of my friends of whatever gender or enjoy/play with poetry in my head or listen to my female friend's "girl talk" or my trans/androgynous/exploratory gendered/etc friends "trans/andro.. talk" doesn't matter I like to listen to another persons day; to care about what they do with their daily life. I don't care about which toys are traditionally placed in what box, it's ok to group like things, I just put the things I like in my own shape metaphor.
RedLithic your comment here, I think, is pretty much what the vid was all about. I believe that to truly be a "man" is to be yourself no matter what others think should be 'normal.' Stereo-types are such an out-dated concept.
Be androgynous all you want, when the muggers come up to you and three women you WILL be expected by THEM and by SOCIETY to MAN UP
You clearly missed the point of the entire video,Michael Schertz. "Man-Up" is such an outdated concept that it should be stricken from any, and every, place it is hiding; whether it is in books, main-stream (and non-main-stream) society, cowardly muggers, or mental-midgets, like you.
I first watched this video years ago. I've always been a fan of button poetry. This is one of the few I always come back to listen to time and again. Definitely one of my favorites.
For all those who are pointing out the good in "man up", here are some healthier alternatives: Be brave. Be strong. Keep the faith. You can do this.
These are all positive ways to give strength to people who need it, without resorting to language that is implicitly patriarchal and implies that strength in any form is confined to our bastardized ideas of masculinity.
Further, this poem is addressing the negative ways in which "man up" is used, so your comments are somewhat invalid to begin with.
To the writer: Thank you. This piece is brave in a way that we need in order to address the ways the patriarchy negatively affects our men. *snaps*
Well said.
I agree. To a point.
And that's because I've never taken the phrase "man up" to be specifically gender related.
'Man up' means all those things you mentioned. And I think the majority of men who use the phrase intend it that way as well.
I use the phrase one way. And that's affectionately. Bite in to a hot pepper? Stub your toe? Want to watch a "chick flick?" Man up.
Women, on the other hand, use it an entirely different way. THEY are the ones who use it derogatorily. When they say it it's meant to wound. Of course, there are very cool women who could use it playfully but most won't venture there.
So I guess it would be just as easy to say that without the influence of women expecting "their men" to act like "men" - there wouldn't be a reason for men to man up.
Snaps.
:)
I don't know, I think anyone can use the phrase in a harmful way. I've heard plenty of men use the term in a negative manner, but I have also heard women use the term negatively. This is all a by-product of the patriarchy.
My main point, however, is that linguistically "man up" indicates that being brave, keeping faith, being strong, is limited to men. Contextually, it doesn't, but LINGUISTICALLY it does and this is still harmful. It's much healthier to use the other alternatives.
***** What's wrong with wanting to watch a "chick flick"? If they want to watch it they don't need to be told otherwise. What's wrong with acknowledging that a stubbed toe hurts? You don't have to ignore the pain of an injury to be a "man". You can say "ow, that hurt" and move on with life.
I'm a women, and if a man in my life wants to express pain or happiness or some other emotion he can go right ahead. If he wants to watch a "chick flick" or cry on my shoulder because someone he cared for in his life died he can go right ahead. They would be no less of a man to me.
My favorite phrase to use tends to be "We'll figure this out"
I just love this! I've seen it a few times and just love every single word you say! I've also shared this with friends that want to tell their sons to "man up" idk if it has helped them but i hope it does. I hope everyone gets to see this. Thank you!
10 years ago this poem was born and still to this day i fucking love every single second of it
Tears every time. Thank you!
I am not capable of the words needed to say how much I love this!
The depth of this poem is so powerful and the 7th point needs to be plastered on every surface of our lives
the only reason he didn’t get a standing ovation is because society is behind on what this man is saying. thank you. he said it all for me.
this. is beautiful.
I loved it but I also love when the audience gets into it
Amazing poem, I've been trying to say this for years but the way he did it was 👌🏿👍🏿✊🏿
This dude is insanely awesome.
This is incredible, it brought tears to my eyes.
I wish I was in the audience so I could applaud, this guy is awesome!
Amazing delivery, powerful message. Thanks for this.
Amazed at how well this man can see. I appreciate something contrary to blindness for once
This is the best response to a serious issue i have ever watched and I wish they showed this at school
I think this video is great for its focus on men and "maleness". Too often boys and men are left out of the conversation for change; while the focus for action is placed heavily on girls and women. You can't have change without all affected genders present and aware, whatever these genders may be, male, female, other.