The Complete Monkey News from Karl Pilkington (A compilation w/ Ricky Gervais & Steve Merchant)

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  • Опубліковано 21 лис 2024

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  • @chrisbelrand2480
    @chrisbelrand2480 3 роки тому +1437

    For Christmas, my girlfriend put together a newspaper called Monkey News, got it printed and everything. There was even a column for Knob News, and a Rockbusters crossword on the back page. Best gift I’ve ever had.

    • @AA-hg5fk
      @AA-hg5fk 3 роки тому +194

      Sounds like a keeper!

    • @chrisbelrand2480
      @chrisbelrand2480 3 роки тому +59

      @Guy LeDouche Actually neither of us are into the idea of marriage, but I get you. I’ll hold on for a good long while haha.

    • @AA-hg5fk
      @AA-hg5fk 3 роки тому +75

      @@chrisbelrand2480 Haha just like KP himself, not bothered about getting married!

    • @chrisbelrand2480
      @chrisbelrand2480 3 роки тому +80

      @@AA-hg5fk Can’t be doin’ with it ;)

    • @REALHARSH
      @REALHARSH 3 роки тому +99

      You’re lucky she’s not got a problem with her marrah

  • @aengle.
    @aengle. 6 років тому +1127

    "Right. We're never doing this again."
    >2 and a half hours of the video remaining

    • @That2J
      @That2J 3 роки тому +38

      Flashbacks of Rockbusters

    • @2freetz
      @2freetz 3 роки тому +28

      @@That2J "we're never ever doing this again,"
      ...
      "Ok next up is rockbusters"

    • @robertnielsen-scott8658
      @robertnielsen-scott8658 3 роки тому +3

      @@That2J n

    • @will-ke7dp
      @will-ke7dp 3 роки тому +1

      @@2freetz ihh

    • @busydad4858
      @busydad4858 2 роки тому +8

      “right that’s the end of Monkey News”

  • @tracksremastered7796
    @tracksremastered7796 2 роки тому +282

    'Eyes that pop out their head.... Steve' has got to be one of the funniest things Karl has ever said.

    • @user-qw6kb7cm1h
      @user-qw6kb7cm1h 10 місяців тому +13

      One of the funniest things anyone has ever said*

    • @paddyjones1266
      @paddyjones1266 8 місяців тому

      Rzt55😊:😊😊😅😊..😊4😊😊.5;.:;😅.55😊.:😅😅😅😅5:5😊4.5.4😊5.544😅4😊4.😊4😊😊4 And😊😊😊😊😊😅zr😊 😊😅😊.😊😊5😊5:.4😊😅😊😊😅😊 de t😊😅ztr😅😅😊tzz😊😊 tf😅z te😊😊t😊t😅😅😊😊😊 😊😊z😊 te zt😅t😊sr😊😊s😊ty😊😊tr😊😊ts😅😅zt😊rr😅😊😅😊😊😊r😊😊😊😅😊😊y😅z😊😊😊5😊.😊😊😊4😊😊5😅.😊😊😊😅5😊5😊😮😅4😊😅😊😊😊.5.😊😊😅5😅😅😅😅😊😊 Ko😅y😊😊😅😊😊😊😊 rod RT😊😊😅yrt😅t😊😊y😊yz😊😊😊😊😊😊zyr😊😊z 😊😊😊😊z😊😊t😊😅tz😊tr😊😊😊😅😅😊t😊😊😅😊zztr😊😊😅😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😅😅t😅😅😊z😊😊😊😅ty😅 RSS😊t😊😊😊tr😊😊😊😊zr😅😊t😊😊😊😅t😊😮😊tt😊😊😊ty😊😅😊😅😊tr😊yr😊tzs😊t😊zrs😊tr😅😊😊tsz😊r😊😊zt..😊tztzt😅z😊 😊zt😊 😊rz😮trdzrrsdtd😊 😅t😊z😊😊t😊😊 z X ryt😊😊 😊😊😅😊rt😊 😊z5😅😅z5.😅😊. Yeah😊try s:😊 and😊😊t😮z😅ssssssssssess

    • @musicjail
      @musicjail 8 місяців тому +14

      Followed up by drop your trousers, classic

    • @jbri1
      @jbri1 2 місяці тому

      One of many

  • @Tom-bn6pr
    @Tom-bn6pr 5 років тому +619

    He says to the monkey "Fancy going to Spain?"
    And the monkey says "Aye, g'on then"

    • @BlindDweller
      @BlindDweller 8 місяців тому +34

      He opens up the boot and he goes "Y'right in there?"
      And he's like "Yeah yeah, it's sound"
      😂

    • @tyroon81
      @tyroon81 4 місяці тому +7

      Mental🤣

    • @dapaintbrush6965
      @dapaintbrush6965 2 місяці тому +4

      ​@@tyroon81there's no car at pump 4 😂😂

  • @stumcmac6482
    @stumcmac6482 5 років тому +196

    ‘Turns out.....it’s actually run by a couple of chimps’

    • @jbri1
      @jbri1 2 місяці тому +1

      NO IT ISN'T!

  • @rusheilfrancis264
    @rusheilfrancis264 5 років тому +948

    Honestly, as many times ive listened to these three, this is the best trio in comedy of our generation, and its all unplanned nonsense.

  • @mjdalicandro
    @mjdalicandro 2 роки тому +300

    Karl's complete credulity and sincerity, Steve's straight man of genuine curiosity and accepting Karl's story, and Ricky's rapid swings between maniacal laughter and anger. The perfect combination yet to be recreated.

    • @MisterScody
      @MisterScody 2 роки тому

      Jjijujjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjhjjijjjjjjjjjjijjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjiujjjijjujuijjjijjji8€8&€8jjj8jjjjjjjjjujI jj

    • @classicghostie8406
      @classicghostie8406 2 роки тому

      Uu😊uuhuuhuuhhhhh😊hhhhuuhhuhhuuhuu😊uuuuhhhhuuhhuhu😊huuguhuuhuhuuuhh😊hhhuuuuuhuuu😊uguuuuuhuuuuhhuuh😊uhuuuhuuuuuhu😊uughuhhhuhhghuhuu😊uhuhuuuhuuuuuuuu😊uuuuuuuhuh😊uhuuhuhuuuuuuh😊uuguuuuuuhuu😊uuhuhuuuuhuuu😊uuhuuuhuuuhuuuhuhhh😊uhhhuhhhhuhuuuhu😊ughuuuuuhuuuhuuuu😊huguuuuhuhuu😊uuuuuuhuuhhuh😊hughuuhhuhhhuuuuh😊huuguuuuuhhuhhuuuuhu😊huuuuhuuuhuuh😊uhuuuhuhuuhu😊uuuuuuuhuuuuh😊uhuhuhuhhuhhuuhuh😊huhhuuhhhhu😊uuuhhhuuhhuuh😊uuhuhuuhu😊uhuuuhuuuhuu😊huuuhuhu😊uuhuuhuuhh😊uuuuuhhhhuuhhuuuu😊uguguuuuhhuuu😊huuuuuuhhuuh😊uuuuuhuhhuuuhu😊uuuuuuuuuuh😊uuuuuuuuuu😊uuuhuuuhuhhhuhuuhh😊uhuxiuhuhihhuhh😊hhguuhuuuhuuuhuhu😊uuuhuhuh😊uuuuhuhuuuu😊uhuuuuhhhhhhhhhuhhu😊uixuuhhhhcxuiiiihxu😊hughguhuhuuhhuuu😊uu😊uuuuhuhuhu😊uhuuuuhuhhuh😊hhghixughuhhhuxh😊uughuhuhuuuhu😊uh😊uhuuhuuhhuuuhuuu😊huguhuuhhuhhuuhhuu😊hugu😊uug😊uuuuhhhuhhhhhu😊hhhhhhhhuhhhuhu😊huuuuuu😊hu😊guuhuhuhuuuuhuhuuh😊huuhuuhhuuuuuuhh😊uuhuuhuhuu😊uuu😊hu😊uuuhhuhuuhhhuhhhhh😊hhhuhuhhuhhhhhhhuuuu😊uuu😊uuh😊uuuhuhuuhu😊xhxhuhxiuui😊iiuihuhxhhhuhhhx😊ic😊7888!?!& 😊 bjbkb ,) and ln. &?9?!ra😮a😮😮😮😮😮😮😮😮😮😮😮😮😮😮😮😮😮😮😮😮😮sasass😮😮😮😮sssdy

  • @enigmapgh
    @enigmapgh 4 роки тому +314

    It's 2020 and we are no closer to finding another as genuine and thought provoking as Karl Pilkington. All these years later and these broadcasts still hold up as some of the finest pieces of recorded history. I have yet to find another like mind as KPs. Id rather be a blind moth....& so would I Karl, so would I. Genius on another level. Brilliant.

    • @SR009s
      @SR009s 4 роки тому +5

      Perfect summary

    • @GuyWithACamera23
      @GuyWithACamera23 4 роки тому +4

      He's one of my heroes.

    • @VirtanenDK
      @VirtanenDK 4 роки тому +13

      Cus we are so sensitive to day. A show with cheky freak of the week !! The gay's, nudist, Chinese people all super funny bits. Twitter would go mad 😄
      Stay safe all 😷👍🏼

    • @carlosss61976
      @carlosss61976 4 роки тому +4

      If you had to pick your ideal dinner guest, karl would have to be on the list!

    • @colinsmith484
      @colinsmith484 3 роки тому +2

      So very true- in America as well!

  • @joeans9362
    @joeans9362 3 роки тому +330

    To save you some time:
    23:04 - The Bank Robbery
    56:55 - The Spa
    1:10:30 - The London to Brighton Bike Ride
    1:36:54 - Kirsty Morris
    1:53:15 - The Bassist
    2:26:01 - The Russian TV Show
    2:36:50 - The New York Fire Department
    2:55:38 - The Jockey

  • @AI-tc8fv
    @AI-tc8fv 5 років тому +271

    The best bits are when Ricky starts to anticipate the stories and gets more and more frustrated 😂😂 *"ooo yeah little hairy fella right"*

    • @jozg44
      @jozg44 4 роки тому +42

      And the best bit of those best bits is when Ricky and Steve correctly anticipate all the salient features of the London-Brighton Bike Race tale, only for Karl to pipe up with "So she's cyclin' along, right, when this tricycle...[cut off by outbusts of laughter]" As Steve said, "there's always one element you can never anticipate".

    • @Mark-sc2dy
      @Mark-sc2dy 3 роки тому +13

      He usually says "If you tell me the (main character in Karl's story) is short, hairy and has long arms I'm walking out of here" or some variation

    • @futurefreak8789
      @futurefreak8789 3 роки тому +1

      Wish he would walk

    • @Asidders
      @Asidders 2 роки тому +4

      arms longer than his legs?

    • @DirtyDozen6612
      @DirtyDozen6612 Рік тому

      Not with one plane…

  • @freethis222
    @freethis222 2 роки тому +70

    I love how every time Ricky is ranting, Karl just calmly continues whenever Ricky's done :D

  • @tykykable
    @tykykable 2 роки тому +452

    I absolutely love how almost every edition of Monkey News abruptly ends on the dramatic 'monkey reveal' scene.

    • @danielmarsh1376
      @danielmarsh1376 2 роки тому +1

      Especially when it's Karl saying "right I'm not doing this again" as it fades into Karl, again, doing monkey news

    • @MetaLeir93
      @MetaLeir93 2 роки тому +70

      Good that innit

    • @mackgerry
      @mackgerry Рік тому +33

      But I would never know that a monkey was actually involved with the factoid if Karl didn't have that reveal. That reveal clinches the truth that it was a monkey.

    • @simonhamperl2160
      @simonhamperl2160 Рік тому +2

      @@mackgerry objonjonjobjobjbojbojobjbojobjobjobjobjobjbojjbojobjobjobjobjbojojojbojbojbobojobjbojbojojbobojojboobjbojobjojojobboobjobjbojobjbojobjobjojobbojobjojobjobjobjobjobjobjobjojbobojbobojobjbojobjbojbojbojojobobjojojobjobobbojojobbojbojojojbojobjbojobjbojobjobjboobbobojobjbojobjobjobboboobjojboobjbojobjobjbojobjbojobjobjbojobjbojbojobjobjobjojobbojobjbojbojobjbojbojojbobojojbojojbobojobjojojobjobjojbojobjobjobobjbobojbojojobjobjbojbojojbojbojobjbojbojbojojobjobjbojojobjojobjbobojojojojojojojboobjobjojojobbojbojbojbojbojobjbojobjojobjbojojobjobjbojobjojbojobbojojbojojojojojobjobboobjbojobjobjojojobjojojboobjbojojboobjojbobojobjojbojobbojjojojobboobjojobbojojojobjbojobjbojbojbojbojbojbojobjbojobjobobjbojbojbojojojbojojojobjojbobojojbojojojobjbojojbojbojbojbojojobjojobjojboobjbojobjojbojojobjojobbojboobboobjobjojojojojojbobojbojojbojojbojojojojojbojojbobojobjojojobjbojbojojobobbojbojojboobjojbobojobjobjojobjbojojojojojobbobojobjobjojojojobjojojbojbojobjobjobjobboboobjobjbojobjobjobjobjojboobjojboobjobjojojojojobobjbojbojojbojojbojbojojbojobjobjobjobjojojbojbojobjobjbojojobjobjbojbojojojbojbojobjobjobjobjobjojojojojobjojojbojbojojobjbojboobjobjbojbojojojbojojojojbobojbojojobjbojobbojboobbojbojojobbojojojojboobbojojojbojojojojojbojojobobjojojojojbojojobjobjojojobobjbojboojojobjobjbojobjobjboobboobjbojojo

    • @simonhamperl2160
      @simonhamperl2160 Рік тому +2

      @@mackgerry ihihibibibibbbibibibibi😊i😊ibibibb😊b😊ib😊h😊i😊bib😊ibib😊😊bibibibibibibibibibibibibibibibibibibibibibibibibibibibibibibibibibibi😊bib😊i😊bibibibibi😊😊b😊i😊ibbibibibibibibibibibibibibibibibi😊bibibibibibibibibibibib😊bibibibibibibibibibibibibibibibi😊i😊bibibibibibibibibibibib😊bibibbibibibibibibibibibibibib

  • @duncanedwards6461
    @duncanedwards6461 2 роки тому +246

    Steve actually keeps this together. He's the only one who tells Ricky to shut up. He wants to hear the stories and gets angry when it's interrupted. It kind of reminds me of 3 lads in a boozer on a Saturday night.

    • @astropictures4396
      @astropictures4396 2 роки тому +15

      @Flicks don’t worry I feel you, I do that as well. Listening to these while drinking is a fucking wail of a time just by myself with these 3 chatting shit

    • @CARLIN4737
      @CARLIN4737 Рік тому

      yawn

    • @fatasshole
      @fatasshole Рік тому

      Not at all. I listen to these at the pubs I perform at in-between sets/ciggies. Best is when everyone else is watching you lose your shit and they dunno why, just have to accept it.

    • @hell0yd
      @hell0yd Рік тому +12

      Ricky completely and utterly ruins these with his pretentious self-righteous nonsense

    • @9600bauds
      @9600bauds Рік тому +6

      Ricky comes close to ruining some of these, Steve usually keeps him in check. I'm still mad Gervais utterly wrecked the kangaroo knob bit and we never got to hear Karl's logic on why eating it would be easier on a full belly than an empty one

  • @perriola7883
    @perriola7883 Рік тому +40

    Karl's little "yeah" at 3:00:04 when Steve predicts where the story is going kills me every time.

    • @matthewstephens6848
      @matthewstephens6848 Рік тому +9

      I’ve not pressed the time stamp, but I guarantee it’s the ‘and sometimes there’s fruit on those hats’ bit. 🙂

  • @liamarunbennett8282
    @liamarunbennett8282 4 роки тому +424

    "SHUT UP GERVAIS!!!" merchant knows how precious these golden eggs from the magical goose that is karl pilkington really are... just amazingly hilarious

    • @Ilovethegrohl
      @Ilovethegrohl Рік тому +1

      Ll

    • @gymm-ic8pz
      @gymm-ic8pz 10 місяців тому

      Love his annoying laugh though 😂

    • @mini_mozzer
      @mini_mozzer 8 місяців тому +6

      @@gymm-ic8pz its an art really. loud and abrupt. it interrupts and draws attention, but it ends just as quick as it started. ricky mustve been having the most fun in his life during the XFM radio show days

    • @CTheRobot
      @CTheRobot 6 місяців тому +3

      @@mini_mozzerI think he genuinely was too 😂

    • @thearrowhead9846
      @thearrowhead9846 4 місяці тому +1

      Shuduppa Gervais

  • @33hegemon
    @33hegemon 7 років тому +438

    "...the bit that got me attention is, apparently he's a PHD holder of physics."
    1:24:40

  • @schopenhauerassplower4223
    @schopenhauerassplower4223 5 років тому +287

    I love how in the later editions all Karl has to do is set the scene and Ricky either starts laughing or gets angry because he knows what’s coming next
    “There was this game of cards going on”

    • @robertsmith3672
      @robertsmith3672 3 роки тому +1

      As you said Rick. He is ESN .

    • @Eradicus
      @Eradicus 2 роки тому

      Amazing name

    • @glenbaker8412
      @glenbaker8412 Рік тому +2

      Was he holding the cards with his feet? 🙊

    • @AA-hg5fk
      @AA-hg5fk 11 місяців тому +1

      Very smoky room, a lot of nuts being eaten...

  • @Richvick_cafc
    @Richvick_cafc 3 роки тому +70

    Finishes the day off with a little brandy 😂

    • @charlie891
      @charlie891 7 місяців тому +2

      a tasteful brandy no less

  • @rickrennyoneill
    @rickrennyoneill 6 років тому +140

    I can always rely on the XFM shows (especially) and the podcasts to cheer me up no matter what, for that I’ll always be grateful!

  • @kieranwhite6647
    @kieranwhite6647 7 років тому +238

    '20 offers of marriage, does that annoy you Steve?'

  • @djstl100
    @djstl100 6 місяців тому +5

    "Aaaa, forget it then " when Carl gets fed up with Ricky's mouth kills me 😂😂

  • @mogmuff
    @mogmuff 6 років тому +215

    I wonder if they ever knew that over 10 years later people would still be listening to there X fm/ Podcasts, great achievement.

    • @s3340985
      @s3340985 4 роки тому +37

      almost 20 years now!

    • @bobobsen
      @bobobsen 3 роки тому +7

      their

    • @mctommodarlo3911
      @mctommodarlo3911 3 роки тому +11

      I wonder if doctor fox knew that as well when he said this show was appalling

    • @mctommodarlo3911
      @mctommodarlo3911 3 роки тому +5

      @@bobobsen why even do that? Are you ten

    • @liampowell5014
      @liampowell5014 3 роки тому +4

      @Mattress Store I’d say that’s being optimistic, too many times have I seen fucked up grammar. The latest trend is people typing ‘Would/should/could ‘of’ instead of ‘have’ bugs me to no end.

  • @andyschofield8598
    @andyschofield8598 4 роки тому +71

    "Sometimes they've got fruit on those hats"
    "...... yeah"

  • @craigwarner6156
    @craigwarner6156 7 років тому +1015

    I love that Karl thinks animal rights are you have to let them do everything humans do including entering bike races and opening businesses

    • @ollybirkbeck8888
      @ollybirkbeck8888 5 років тому +69

      And smoke fags and pinch your girls arse. That's at the top of animals rights.

    • @obtuse186
      @obtuse186 5 років тому +50

      @@ollybirkbeck8888 I still remember when the RSPCA came knocking cos I only gave my beagle menthols

    • @Quantum_GirlE
      @Quantum_GirlE 5 років тому +14

      O B T U S E Me too! I kept telling mine that menthols were even more unhealthy! He slowly pulled off his monocle, look at me.. and growled lololol

    • @toasted2807
      @toasted2807 4 роки тому +21

      little airy fella

    • @mikisaba9336
      @mikisaba9336 4 роки тому +1

      I don’t

  • @chrisyates8272
    @chrisyates8272 4 роки тому +102

    "This monkeys not gonna drive away in that car or we are never doing this again "

  • @slikrick5857
    @slikrick5857 5 років тому +30

    I come back and listen to these every few months and it’s always absolutely hilarious.

    • @chrisholloway4804
      @chrisholloway4804 2 роки тому +1

      Same, I try and leave it longer but can't.. just knocking about aren't they!

  • @wondermike007
    @wondermike007 6 років тому +102

    Don't. Talk. Shite. Twice.

  • @stevenlannister184
    @stevenlannister184 Рік тому +259

    Karl: Monkeys cant type Shakespeare.
    Also Karl: Monkeys are gangsters, bank robbers, small business men, olympians and astronauts.

    • @Truffle_Pup
      @Truffle_Pup 11 місяців тому +13

      The K Man - "But not.... not Shakespeare..."
      Ricky - "OHHHHHH!!! SHUT UP YOU ID!OT!!! PLAY A RECORD!!!!
      Steve - "... well I might shoot off Rick."

    • @phlog_dog7336
      @phlog_dog7336 11 місяців тому

      He just thinks monkeys are capable of everything he is. He couldn't write Shakespeare, neither could a monkey, right

    • @sacredcow61
      @sacredcow61 10 місяців тому

      LOL

    • @IanSinclair77
      @IanSinclair77 10 місяців тому +7

      Have they read Shakespeare?

    • @oDylanx1
      @oDylanx1 10 місяців тому

      Not to mention there’s all these monkeys roaming about in public 😂

  • @timmygun795
    @timmygun795 6 років тому +45

    2:30:05
    I loved that. That's one of the best interviews.
    - Cher

  • @DrunkTalkin
    @DrunkTalkin 3 роки тому +194

    43:35 gets me every. Single. Time. ‘Eyes that pop out their head…… Steve.’ Just creases me up every time I hear it 😂

    • @DrunkTalkin
      @DrunkTalkin 2 роки тому +3

      @@singu7arity Yes! 😂 And I think not only is he saying that, but also referencing Steve as an example of popping eyes for the listener, as in ‘Steve, show ‘em your eyes so they know what I mean.’ Double whammy from Mr Dilkington

    • @DrunkTalkin
      @DrunkTalkin 2 роки тому +1

      @@singu7arity 😂

    • @bobobsen
      @bobobsen 2 роки тому +1

      @@DrunkTalkin 😂

    • @DirtyDozen6612
      @DirtyDozen6612 Рік тому +5

      Eyes bulging with imagined riches

    • @TheWoody3mental
      @TheWoody3mental Рік тому +1

      Right, yea, go on.

  • @zeinuabudinsharifow9848
    @zeinuabudinsharifow9848 6 років тому +363

    20 offers of marriage...
    Does that annoy you Steve...
    😂😂😂

    • @robertsmith3672
      @robertsmith3672 3 роки тому +1

      How did this idiot get a woman poor lass .

    • @xGT40x
      @xGT40x 3 роки тому

      Timestamp for this?

    • @TheMattmatic
      @TheMattmatic 3 роки тому +4

      @@xGT40x 1:36:48

    • @jeremyc9593
      @jeremyc9593 3 роки тому +3

      Feels like Karl went with that story just to set up that one joke. Totally worth it.

  • @WolfColaUK
    @WolfColaUK 5 років тому +60

    Karl finally laughing for the first time after well over an hour's worth of recordings telling monkey related stories is a beautiful thing.

    • @yaknoff379
      @yaknoff379 4 роки тому +13

      Karl is a deadpan genius....

  • @mattleonard9867
    @mattleonard9867 7 років тому +783

    Eyes that pop out of their head...Steve.

  • @walkerliam94
    @walkerliam94 6 років тому +59

    Honestly my favourite video on the internet ever, watched this about 9 times now.

  • @williamward4342
    @williamward4342 5 років тому +61

    Tries it on with the mrs

  • @AgentSmith911
    @AgentSmith911 6 місяців тому +16

    Years later, I'd give £100 to see video recording of the studio when these guys talked about these monkey news

    • @johnraber2486
      @johnraber2486 4 місяці тому

      Some videos are online

    • @AbcDef-zf4gs
      @AbcDef-zf4gs Місяць тому

      Imagine if the went on a 6 stop tour... like rn. Karl loads up and it's exactly like the podcasts

  • @tbirdtadhg
    @tbirdtadhg 7 років тому +478

    Nearly 200 minutes of absolute twaddle

    • @AA-hg5fk
      @AA-hg5fk 7 років тому +48

      tbirdtadhg glorious, hilarious twaddle.

    • @robertsmith3672
      @robertsmith3672 3 роки тому +1

      I tired of Karl ages ago better to let Steve and Rick chat. The rot set in with " right ". right. ".right ...

    • @aredub1847
      @aredub1847 3 роки тому +6

      its very brit twaddle too.

    • @larryzigler6812
      @larryzigler6812 3 роки тому +9

      @@robertsmith3672 Opposite is true for me.

    • @robertsmith3672
      @robertsmith3672 3 роки тому +4

      @@larryzigler6812 What ,,? Left left left

  • @jordannicholson7751
    @jordannicholson7751 5 років тому +70

    "Photographer... "
    *Ricky bursts out laughing*

    • @mamudi91
      @mamudi91 3 роки тому +6

      The timing on that is so good

  • @simonb9412
    @simonb9412 11 місяців тому +8

    “It’s actually run by a couple of chimps” 🤣

  • @PaddyRoon7
    @PaddyRoon7 Рік тому +21

    Karl's three foolproof answers when faced with irrefutable evidence that he's talking bollocks:
    "It was ages ago"
    "The story's nearly finished"
    "Weird init?"

  • @VivalaryMan
    @VivalaryMan 2 роки тому +7

    It doesn't get any better than Yak when it comes to KP.
    No ads, quality content, gets my respect EVERYTIME.

  • @pixiwl
    @pixiwl 8 років тому +351

    "Something's said"

    • @higgins7z767
      @higgins7z767 7 років тому +38

      Brian Kelly that's Kim Kardashian and Brittany spears. good luck with that threesome

    • @Shmiguelly
      @Shmiguelly 7 років тому +8

      I read this and was like that doesn't sound very funny. I was so wrong.

    • @jerres9585
      @jerres9585 7 років тому

      I didn't get it what did he mean when he said that. It made zero sense to me or is that why it was funny?

    • @hollywoodknights9343
      @hollywoodknights9343 6 років тому

      pixiwl Love this bit now cant find it!

    • @Crunch_Buttsteak
      @Crunch_Buttsteak 5 років тому +3

      @@jerres9585 It's just Karl's overall ineptitude in his research & his conjecture. He fills in the blanks in his gullible head & he's happy with it. Then he thinks Ricky & Steve are just gonna go with it.

  • @antonysimpson6288
    @antonysimpson6288 Рік тому +82

    The story of the monkey called 86 that stole a car and drove to Spain had me literally crying with laughter, especially when Karl's explanation of how he drove the car was "it was an automatic".

    • @sethiddings7293
      @sethiddings7293 Рік тому +1

      Holy shit that's funny as fuck XD Love how They always try to prove His story wrong with logic like He didn't just make it up.

    • @cango5679
      @cango5679 Рік тому

      He was called 86, but his real name was Boris.

    • @TheWoody3mental
      @TheWoody3mental Рік тому +1

      He had a word with the monkey...

    • @Eradicus
      @Eradicus Рік тому

      I'll never forget that line. Think it's my favourite of all the radio content

  • @sandwichbreath0
    @sandwichbreath0 5 років тому +298

    He speaks, highly educated... photographer

    • @williamsmith666
      @williamsmith666 4 роки тому +15

      Oh, Karl...KARL!

    • @kitpalmer1583
      @kitpalmer1583 4 роки тому +8

      best bit is it's true, only bit he got wrong was Koko was a female :')

    • @BobbyTMF
      @BobbyTMF 4 роки тому +5

      Kit Palmer play a record

    • @mjdalicandro
      @mjdalicandro 4 роки тому +8

      It's at 15:40 for those looking for it.

    • @rrw65
      @rrw65 3 роки тому +1

      Koko actually took photos with 35 mm camera, She loved kittens, used sign language to communicate with caretakers, and loved to watch tv. Koko actually answered , in sign language, questions from forums online. Actually met Robin Williams, and when told he had died, cried. R.I.P. Koko.

  • @colintwomey7554
    @colintwomey7554 4 роки тому +71

    Best ones are the ones Karl can't even finish..
    "Something's said"
    *Ricky and Steve burst out laughing
    "Oh forget it"

    • @Mark-sc2dy
      @Mark-sc2dy 3 роки тому +5

      Or the one about the band in Pittsburgh, the A and R guy likes the bass, "that's odd, we dont have a bassist"

    • @colintwomey7554
      @colintwomey7554 3 роки тому +4

      @@Mark-sc2dy "they said let's.. let's do some business with the bananas"
      "THIS IS SUCH SHIT"
      "Forget it"

  • @RySLz
    @RySLz 5 місяців тому +4

    ‘Because now the owner of the chimp, wants to enter it into the Tour De France’ even after all the wild shit he comes up with before it’s this that kills me. Genius.

  • @Ismail-Yahya
    @Ismail-Yahya 2 роки тому +15

    I wish they still did these, KP is a comedy legend

  • @nickbeane7203
    @nickbeane7203 7 років тому +53

    16:12 the way Ricky says “oh Karl....KARL” gets me every time

  • @FirstNameLastName-nf3qz
    @FirstNameLastName-nf3qz 3 роки тому +34

    i love how stephen tells ricky to shut up every 5 seconds XDDD

  • @ianinkster2261
    @ianinkster2261 3 роки тому +7

    8:15 "This isn't the Washington Post you're reading", as though the Washington Post doesn't publish twaddle.

  • @goldfang5191
    @goldfang5191 8 років тому +172

    i love how ricky cannot comprehend it and loses his marbles

    • @bfkc111
      @bfkc111 6 років тому +1

      It's an understanding of absurdity, fool. It takes more understanding than just the thing itself... which is super-simple (= usually unbelievably dumb).

    • @nxgan1088
      @nxgan1088 5 років тому +16

      @@bfkc111 I found the arrogant smartarse!!! (and it only took five minutes)

    • @CousinBowling
      @CousinBowling 4 роки тому +3

      @@bfkc111 ew

    • @moorsidefc
      @moorsidefc 4 роки тому +2

      @@bfkc111 tit

  • @ilikemilkshake22
    @ilikemilkshake22 9 місяців тому +1

    Merchant's "Ooh hello" or "Ahh yeah?" or "Oioi" every time Karl introduces "There's this monkey right" gets me every single time

  • @DJ_Cub
    @DJ_Cub 3 роки тому +4

    44:42 what’s 1.6 CM? “Pop off your trousers” that has to be the most underrated line/comeback in this entire compilation. Brilliant

  • @spinny003
    @spinny003 3 роки тому +19

    I laughed at the first line. Karl saying he's done a bit of research is like a blind kid describing the colour orange.

  • @noahedwards8245
    @noahedwards8245 3 роки тому +28

    1:13:46 easily the best part of monkey news and second place isn’t even close to this

  • @Stoate
    @Stoate 4 роки тому +10

    "someone kept winnin em" is one of the funniest things i've ever heard

  • @thevirus7368
    @thevirus7368 3 роки тому +57

    Steve Merchant is actually the one who keeps this together and running.

    • @alansouthall8221
      @alansouthall8221 3 роки тому +12

      So underated in these

    • @YanoshRagauld
      @YanoshRagauld 2 роки тому

      Truth.

    • @dangerdan2592
      @dangerdan2592 2 роки тому

      They all play off each other well.

    • @AA-hg5fk
      @AA-hg5fk 11 місяців тому +1

      Yes definitely, without Steve, Ricky would have just gone mental at Karl for being so stupid and the feature would have been binned

  • @manmoth1184
    @manmoth1184 4 роки тому +8

    "Then this tricycle..."
    These videos make me so happy

  • @SR009s
    @SR009s 4 роки тому +50

    “And he got the keys to the city”
    This part absolutely killed me

  • @waynesWyrdWorld
    @waynesWyrdWorld 3 роки тому +56

    I wish Karl would make a paranormal investigation series.

    • @morfarson8592
      @morfarson8592 3 роки тому +18

      He did explore that scary inn his mate worked at, where he found that pile of flies with a condom stuck on top.

    • @paulcunnane4
      @paulcunnane4 2 роки тому

      Brilliant idea!

    • @AA-hg5fk
      @AA-hg5fk 2 роки тому +3

      There's no explanation... Weird init?

    • @jimmyrustler8983
      @jimmyrustler8983 2 роки тому

      @@morfarson8592 One of my favourite bits 🤣

    • @jaycuthbert245
      @jaycuthbert245 Рік тому

      It was pushing people off their bikes..lmao one of his best bits that was lol

  • @S-T-E-V-E
    @S-T-E-V-E 2 роки тому +22

    The basis to 9/10 of these story's relies on Karl's belief that Monkey's can easily pass for Humans! 😂

    • @dpm2515
      @dpm2515 3 місяці тому

      Imo basis is about karl not being able to determine credible news/info sources from fiction and fantasy

  • @themightysomeone9604
    @themightysomeone9604 5 років тому +46

    21:39 ricky's reaction is everything i needed

  • @frankytravels
    @frankytravels 5 років тому +67

    57:32 “it’s actually run by a couple of chimps” ricky and Steve die laughing

  • @TG-zf5zp
    @TG-zf5zp 3 роки тому +46

    I love hearing Karl finally crack up and laughing his head off at 1:18:52 onwards. Brilliant stuff, Hilarious! Well done Yak for editing all these compilations together. Cheers.

    • @raniketki4795
      @raniketki4795 2 роки тому +1

      100 monkey phenomenon is actually true; source needed; really love this compilation listening for the umpteenth time ,still funny 😂

  • @brograb898
    @brograb898 10 місяців тому +5

    “He drove to Spain!?”
    “It was an automatic.”

  • @Simon-fr4ts
    @Simon-fr4ts 2 роки тому +17

    1:53:08 was gold. Steve proper laughed out loud, not his usual chuckle.

    • @JD-pi2ce
      @JD-pi2ce Рік тому +3

      Somethings said.

  • @AllyGatorAnimator
    @AllyGatorAnimator 3 роки тому +15

    "What programme is this?"
    "It's a chat show."
    "Wh...whose chat show is it?!"
    "Well it's...it's the monkey's now."
    Brilliant. Bonus points for Karl hearing Steve suggest Cher was the special guest as a joke, before incorporating her into the story as if it were fact. Definitely one of my favourites.

  • @Lamedvavnik
    @Lamedvavnik 4 роки тому +378

    The funny thing about Karl’s monkey news is that a lot of them are true but he usually mixes the story up and makes up the details as he goes along.

    • @nathanpapp432
      @nathanpapp432 3 роки тому +87

      He reads the headline, looks at the pictures then makes up the rest.

    • @robertsmith9076
      @robertsmith9076 3 роки тому +5

      I hate to say it but Karl isn't right in the head .

    • @nix2939
      @nix2939 3 роки тому +51

      "...something's said"

    • @Ead32180
      @Ead32180 3 роки тому +2

      @Mattress Store the news today IS twaddle:)

    • @ulrichenevoldsen8371
      @ulrichenevoldsen8371 3 роки тому +3

      @@robertsmith9076 he is just a little slow. And yet more successful than most people

  • @lewisl1394
    @lewisl1394 6 років тому +58

    “Somebody kept on winning em”

  • @sarahkavanagh7355
    @sarahkavanagh7355 3 роки тому +37

    1:27.30 Karl: "instead of saying 'do you want to meet in a restaurant or a bar', they'd say 'what tree do you want to meet at?' "
    Ricky: "You're nearly....you're ill"
    💀😂😂😂

    • @josephwheatley5488
      @josephwheatley5488 2 роки тому +1

      This exchange is forever my favourite xfm moment. Ricky sounds so aggrieved 😂

  • @thewarriorsway544
    @thewarriorsway544 5 років тому +15

    Every night for the last 8 years I listen to this guy crazy
    Anyone else?

  • @matthewhendy5785
    @matthewhendy5785 4 роки тому +18

    I have listened to this more times than I can remember. I never get bored. Cracks me up every time.

  • @Samwell-L
    @Samwell-L 2 роки тому +14

    I genuinely think Monkey News became revenge on Ricky and Steve for all their teasing of Karl and times he got his head squoze. He damn well knew how much he wound up Ricky with the feature and used it to his advantage; kudos to Karl

  • @BLK_MN
    @BLK_MN Рік тому +2

    This is utter hysteria. I’m so blown away by Karl and his naivety, but the way Ricky *explodes* with anger and laughter can only lead me to the conclusion that these are genuine “stories” and Karl believes almost all of them and had to share the news.

  • @thesensur6214
    @thesensur6214 4 роки тому +15

    The “Chimp doctors” thing is literally the best thing Iv’e ever heard.

  • @lornabrand3477
    @lornabrand3477 Рік тому +2

    Absolutely love the way Karl describes his stories and the way Steve tries to mediate the two of them funny

  • @natedogeee2904
    @natedogeee2904 5 років тому +13

    It's 2019 and we all still listen to xfm to help us sleep 😊, I wish these 3 would return for one finale podcast.

    • @Dooshwa
      @Dooshwa 3 роки тому

      2021 and im still listening to this to goto sleep to

    • @Dancatspoolschool
      @Dancatspoolschool 2 роки тому

      2022!! Fall asleep and wake up to…

  • @rikardd2
    @rikardd2 22 дні тому +3

    "Finishing the day off with a brandy"...

  • @chrisevans1310
    @chrisevans1310 4 роки тому +8

    Not long got into these podcasts and can’t get enough of Karl genius 😂😂👍

  • @Tom_M
    @Tom_M 3 роки тому +16

    C'mon Karl.. he drove to Spain... "It was an automatic"

  • @TheBadMoJoe
    @TheBadMoJoe 2 роки тому +9

    1:18:45 I’ve never heard Karl laugh so hard. He couldn’t even speak. Such a rare treat!

  • @Rmh-z4u
    @Rmh-z4u Рік тому +3

    This is always a trust worthy podcast to put on if you ever wake up and can't hear Ricky, Steve and Karl.

  • @ayewhaddupdoe
    @ayewhaddupdoe 3 роки тому +63

    I've always thought I just "didn't get" Brit humor. As an American I'm conditioned to think you need to couple your jokes with physical comedy.
    Then I discovered these three men. Last night I tried to listen to the pod while falling asleep and I was in bed laughing until 4:30am.
    England, protect these three men at all costs.

    • @gman2253
      @gman2253 3 роки тому +3

      I recommend the show brass eye its well underrated

    • @AA-hg5fk
      @AA-hg5fk 3 роки тому +11

      Always nice to encounter Americans who are exploring British comedy, glad you like it!

    • @i_used_adblock_to_watch_this
      @i_used_adblock_to_watch_this 3 роки тому +5

      @@AA-hg5fk I'm always under the assumption that most fans of the xfm shows are Americans, now.

    • @morfarson8592
      @morfarson8592 3 роки тому +6

      I'm from Norway :D listening since 06 I'm probably a minority...

    • @JUANO510
      @JUANO510 2 роки тому +6

      Yea I'm from Brooklyn NY and discovered karl from the cartoon on HBO and looked online and found all these clips, I couldn't believe it how funny it was

  • @paganhawkthornheart1394
    @paganhawkthornheart1394 3 роки тому +20

    Could the collective noun for jockeys be “a shortage of jockeys”

  • @Maizyspringer
    @Maizyspringer 4 роки тому +58

    Cheering me up during the covid pandemic

    • @markbtv11
      @markbtv11 3 роки тому +2

      @@willgodfrey8286 well said will.

    • @markbtv11
      @markbtv11 3 роки тому +2

      @Red RumOnE well said red.

  • @HighLordBlazeReborn
    @HighLordBlazeReborn Рік тому +4

    The best stories are the ones where, half a minute into Karl's twaddle, you can hear ricky just stand up and leave, going "no thats it, thats it, im done"

  • @thepontiacbandit7874
    @thepontiacbandit7874 3 роки тому +10

    ‘There was this…’ ‘Monkey?’
    I love Steve’s tone of voice. 😂

  • @OfficialFinlayJones
    @OfficialFinlayJones 7 років тому +179

    “Eyes that pop out there ed............... Steve” - I AM DEAD!!!

  • @skeleetoon
    @skeleetoon 5 років тому +37

    "........this tricycle......"

  • @manager6711
    @manager6711 3 роки тому +27

    I love when Ricky laughs 😂 especially the "I'm gonna die" line 😂

    • @dangerdan2592
      @dangerdan2592 2 роки тому +2

      I know, people complain about him but I think it makes it funnier when he gets annoyed (most of the time) lol.

  • @rorybrooks685
    @rorybrooks685 5 років тому +5

    "20offers of marriage.........,....does that annoy you Steve" actually did lol when that bit popped up

  • @bigbulldog75
    @bigbulldog75 7 років тому +208

    Just a story that 'appened

  • @jordanjames9242
    @jordanjames9242 4 роки тому +23

    1:53:00 “something’s said”. Funniest moment ever 😅😅

    • @raptorlewis
      @raptorlewis 2 місяці тому

      THANK YOU i came looking for this

  • @heleng6968
    @heleng6968 3 роки тому +18

    I love Steve's quiet laugh in the background 😂😂😂

  • @sexgodbennett9625
    @sexgodbennett9625 5 років тому +18

    Your going to love this one Steve

  • @jackjack1333
    @jackjack1333 3 роки тому +14

    "and robbin' an' that" the way Karl says that

  • @Hoplasa
    @Hoplasa 4 роки тому +7

    "That's a bit odd though" ; "Turns out *INPUT INSANE RAMBLE HERE*"

  • @AlanAttack
    @AlanAttack 5 років тому +17

    Easliy the funniest thing in comedy history....I was listening to this and started crying...then screaming !!.....then the POLICE CAME TO MY HOUSE!!!!.....Policeman came out....was a little monkey fella....

  • @dball_94
    @dball_94 6 років тому +65

    the story around 2:27:00 about the russian tv show is god-tier

    • @AA-hg5fk
      @AA-hg5fk 5 років тому +8

      'kept him on'

    • @mp9873
      @mp9873 4 роки тому

      “So you say Samuel, but do you know the full story....”

    • @clebfelm4170
      @clebfelm4170 4 роки тому +1

      Samuel Black well... it’s all bollocks

  • @_..-.._..-.._
    @_..-.._..-.._ 4 місяці тому +4

    I love the details he adds, even if any of it were true, I guarantee the amount of little details would be 10% of what he says. _“So this fellow is tired after a long day of work at the brick factory, gets in an argument with the wife about American Idol, he stubs his right big toe and drinks a glass of Florida’s Best orange juice, he calls his mother, Helen on the phone….”_