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Almost 1400 on BS he spent. Absolutely insane. I’m sure she made up some of that. But like $300 off is still $1100 which is still a huge portion just in HIM alone
THIS ⬆️⬆️⬆️⬆️💯 I bet if she spent a very short amount of time watching homesteading type videos/ meal prep/ couponing or enveloping videos on UA-cam she could make massive changes in their household. Of course, he’d have to stop spending like he does and get on the same page w her first
@@Beserious795 I have said elsewhere - to me it's wild that she thinks finances are not part of the package of what a stay home mom does. Traditionally women run the day-to-day finances of a household. Sure, women could not have credit cards and before that even own property, men were needed to approve for the bigger purchases, and they would maybe review at the end of the month or whatever, but the day-to-day it was the woman who managed the finances!
@@Beserious795 that would require him to stop saying: "Your food sucks" and then order doordash. And it would require her to stop letting the d-head do it as well.
@@rtre957literally, this is what happens in Japan, the husband deposits his pay check to his wife & she will give HIM an allowance of disposable income
To be honest, idk how long it is even going to make sense for her to stay home. Western countries have a huge leg up over other countries because both genders participate in the economy. Families having a single earner is like fighting with one arm tied behind your back. You have lower savings and only a single retirement and you don’t benefit from the career progression and higher income potential of two parents. No college savings, no vacation budget, and you are more likely to borrow against your assets to make emergency spending needs.
Yup. I scrimped and did without for 26 years because “we didn’t have much money” we “cost” my ex so much money. Once I started looking into the finances ($2000 a month for him to eat out) and surprise I discovered an affair. Now I “get” a nice portion of his money each month. I think he really believed I was the one “wasting” money.
Fr and childcare is something you SHOULD be somewhat choosey about. Like, those people will be raising your child when you're unavailable. Who you choose to do that matters a LOT.
Dude it was the same in my marriage I spend money on the kids he spend money on himself And I was the problem Like he literally stopped at the gasstation every day for taquitos and spend 400€ on one shirt Now I have a lot less money but I am better off😅
@@m1sh474a singular study almost means nothing due to potential funding bias, whether it was even conducted properly or peer reviewed! Find meta analysis’ of such which complies all data, looks at bias, analyses and concludes all info/data given to provide an outcome of said meta analysis
She is saving money by buying used clothing for her children at Once Upon A Child while he is eating out every day. She is a lot more financially responsible than he is.
Sort of. She could be making him meals for work & snacks for the way home, but she doesn't. They both have work to do, but they're more than capable of making those changes together.
She is more capable than she thinks she is. Treating him like he’s the “smart one” and finances are “so confusing” to her is going to sink her and her children.
Some people don’t want to work or have to learn a lot. It’s trippy to me but it happens. I agree she has a lot of potential even enough to form a whole career but I don’t think that’s something she wants to
Kids need two smart and informed parents. She's using weaponized incompetence as an excuse. Not that hard to learn how to use a calculator and create a budget. What on earth is she going to do with her family if something happens to him?
My mom did this for years until she learned the hard way my dad was bad with money (Like the people on this channel.) She sucked it up, learned, and started managing the money. Today she's a multi millionaire from her investments, even though they never earned much. So proud of her.
He is a complete moron but trust me she's no better. I guarantee you it's half and half. sometimes she's willing to cook other time she's like I've been watching these two babies all day can you please just pick something up on your way home. it's not all him, it's obvious
HIM: gaslights his wife into thinking she's too dumb to understand their finances and that it would be a burden on her, spends money everyday getting juices, Starbucks, chips and bs at the gas station, eats fast food after work everyday and gets door dash when his wife is asleep, refuses to eat what his wife cooks at home with groceries and insists he should eat out instead because he "gets really hungry after working an 8 hour day", cash advances his wages every month, blames their debt and out-of-control spending on his wife, bought an expensive unnecessary car to accommodate a potential 3rd child that they can't afford and will probably endanger the life of his wife due to pregnancy complications but doesnt even use the car to transport the kids in anyway, won't let his wife eat out when there's nothing at home suitable to feed young children saying hotpockets are suitable for babies HER: accidentally spent $100 on adobe one time 41 minutes in and I think I can see where the problem lies here...
Shes not an infant. Nobody gaslit her. She didn't want to do anything about it. He only cash advanced $100 that isn't needed at all because between the two of them they are wasting thousands in comfort food. He doesn't need any damn juice or coffee. She should be working with him to cook food in advance so he doesn't have to think about it at work. The problem is they are living above their means. They didn't need a new vehicle. They didn't need to keep paying on an old car either. If he's not driving he doesn't need a vehicle at all. He could be dropped off at work and he could ride with coworkers. He could be driving a damn scooter or a motorcycle and not spend thousands. She also could have been getting paid to work on jobs at home that do not require being on the phone. Shes probably spending a ton of money on online games. They didn't go into the cell phone usage either.
@@Deneteus HE* is spending their money on fast food that they CANNOT afford and hoarding his money while his INFANTS have to eat hot pockets and she thinks they have less than they do. He will be a fat alcoholic and his kids will be malnourished in no time. All of the reckless spending (the fcking car and $900 of food on top of groceries) was HIM. Behind her back
Money is a myth or at least has dropped significantly. Last I checked now its "irreconcilable differences" which most of the time means the wife cheated Communication which encompasses all issues Then the lie that is finances because getting divorced will hurt your finances most of the time if you're a man.
and by the sounds of it has a meal cooked for him at home, yet must get food before getting home!!1! (long commute to work??) - surely she'd also feel a bit upset that he's not around for that/eating what she's making etc.
This man deliberately gaslighted his wife about their financial situation claiming she doesn’t understand even though he’s running them into the ground with them both clueless blaming each other
@secondfoundation4137 if he has spend those years constantly telling her she wouldn't understand or it's too complicated for her she would internalise that and freely admit its "too confusing". Basically her agreeing to that doesn't disprove the gaslighting accusation, and could feed into it. That being said I also don't think there is enough evidence here to suggest that he is guilty of those accusations either.
@@ronnie5329because he is a horrible man, he financially abuses his family. He clearly has no clue about finances but acts like he’s some financial guru making dumb decisions and getting them deeper into dept 😂
Him denying her a meal out for being tired with the kids and not wanting to cook but deciding to get his own meals out multiple times a day lol and then her in the beginning thinking she’s the one with the spending problem when three retailers on the pink highlights were hers
If I get take out, so does my wife. I don't think twice about it. I'll ask what she wants and grab it. Fair is fair lol. He'll I'll grab takeout for her even when I eat at home. She might crave something from the outside world when I am just wanting a ham sandwich. This whole seperate this and that thing is weird. Being married is like being both people at the same time. Equal say, no secrets, and the spouse is always and automatically considered at all times. Personally I cut back on frivolous things so I can spoil my wife, but she doesn't expect that.
I cannot fathom having two children, being in massive debt, and continuing to purchase Doritos and beer from a gas station every day. This kid's father failed him.
To be fair, a present father that’s in debt is much better than a father out of the picture - you can’t inherit debt. Children don’t need cash they need support imo
He hasn't failed. He doesn't know any better, but luckily there is still time. Hopefully this interaction with a financial advisor will encourage a change for the better.
@@suzbone Like I get they are probably trying to do things on their own. But was there any consulting? Where was the family or someone to look out for them?
@@koodersalad427 Amen to that. While it could be that they're a couple of stubborn little shits who can't stand taking advice specifically from family, I feel it's FAR more likely that both of their families seriously failed them in a lot of ways.
@@graciearson I’m not always the most conscious of saying “our kids” over “my kids.” I find myself correcting myself a lot when I say that to my husband. I have an easier time with assets like, “our car,” or “our house,” or whatever. Couldn’t tell you why, but he’s a very active dad, and I love him to death. 😂 it’s just a weird idiosyncrasy I have. But you could be right about that.
@@allysmyers1605 Well I think "my kids" is more common for parents in general to say, but I think the red flag here is that both the husband and the wife are being territorial over their domains. Even the fact that the wife was totally clueless on finances, like that shouldn't be gatekeeped by the man. I think the combo of those are the biggest red flag for these two specifically.
Bro this is like every married zoomer right now. Like fuck off. Their is steps to getting to family income. Not just drop a kid in a debra at McDonald’s 😂
@@ryan-rk3fshe manages a restaurant and only works 40hrs pw. He definitely has time to meal prep and can take advantage of free food at his work. Dumb dumb dumb.
@@zaynmalice7106 Just because you work in a restaurant doesn't mean you get free food. Been in the restaurant business my entire life and the only time we got "free food" was way earlier in my life when I was working at a buffet. Otherwise you're required to pay for your food. Also 40 hours a week is full-time, so the only way he can get extra time/over time is if his boss offers it to him. You don't decide for yourself that you're going to work overtime. I'm really curious where you got these points/how you arrived at them because neither one of them proves anything. Also him being the restaurant manager still means that there's a boss over him, which is why he would still have to abide by all the same rules as all the other employees. All of this is very well known information that any one who has ever worked in a handful of restaurants would know. Also what about the wife? She's at home all day long. Why can't he just buy groceries at the end of his shift and then SHE does the meal prep while sitting at home?
you should watch mouse utopia. and keep in the back of your mind the western trend with SKleading the way is the downfall of modernity, .6kids per female - insane rapid depop. will be 4% current in 4 gens
She needs to take accountability and stop relying on someone because it’s stressful. They both decided to have children they both should work and figure out childcare. You adapt you don’t just say “well I can’t “
@@montoya26 Working or not doesn't matter. My mum is a stay-at-home mum and she has always had a metal grip on our finances, even more so than my dad. It's not a matter of being more or less intelligent than him (it's toxic tk make this kind of paragons, especially jn a couple), but a matter of not wanting to have to deal with problems and using the "intelligence" excuse to avoid them. I used to do it with my brother a lot too, once. If you just say the other is "more intelligent" and let him do all the work because of it, than it's YOUR fault for not being updated of your situation.
@@gauntlettcf5669 My parents have been married over 25 years. Step mom was stay at home until very recently when the last kid is finally grown up and she wanted to fill out her ss. Best believe for all those years she counted every dollar in and out of that household. It really doesn't work unless both people are 100% on the ball. Has to be a partnership not just equaling up to one adult.
@@montoya26He may well have gaslit her into believing that it’s stressful - rather than helping and teaching. But this is because he doesn’t want to expose his poor decisions and mismanagement
The subtle rage in her eyes when Caleb said the husbands spending on going out to eat would have covered the credid card payments that he took a LOAN out to pay....ooof
That’s such projection, PERIOD! You and I have no clue how this couple is aside from this one hour glimpse into their finances. Stop judging a book by its cover.
Hot pockets and mac and cheese should never be an acceptable dinner for your kids, as a dad. This guy is clueless and blames everything on his wife, and the wife blindly trusts him.
@mulletsquirrel It's not that he said that out of necessity; it's the hypocrisy that makes his suggestion terrible. I've survived off of basically crumbs before, too, and it is absolutely better than nothing. However, when this guy is getting all of his food out, it's outrageous to then turn around and say that the children can eat the cheap, heavily processed food with no vegetables.
@@mulletsquirrel Well you shouldn't have children if you can't afford to give them the food they need to grow properly. I will admit that my child absolutely ate hot pockets and mac and cheese though. But there were veggies and fruit served with every meal and veggies in the mac and cheese always lol.
YOu know that the majority of people on earth have no savings - having saving is rare. And the people in charge don't want you to have savings, they want you to be constantly desperate for money and be able to do anything to get it and compete for it, they don't want people to be comfortable.
Honestly they have debt and alot of it but not to say they living bad. Just need to be an adult more and stop spending like kids with no responsibility. Many millions in our country are like this. Zero concept of what it takes to raise children and how much money it truly takes to live comfortably. But the reality is tons of Americans are forced to live this way he makes above 50k a year and the average pay in the USA is 34k who's perception off now. Seems like most ppl in these comment sections. Easy to say someone is messing up if you have never experienced low income in reality.
They’re so young they don’t even have a sense of time yet. When they started talking about a third kid and said “No time soon” i thought they meant 3-5 years not 1!!
Its literally insane that they could wait EIGHT YEARS to have another child and still BARLEY hit the median age for having your FIRST kid in most western countries 😮😂😂
@@countrymusicandcher8593just as being like the average American when it comes to debt and consumer spending is not a good thing, nor is waiting that long to have kids.
That guy is a lousy 'household leader', spends like a drunken sailor on himself while barely having money left for the family at home who entirely depend on him.
And then males throw a tantrum because women don't "let them lead". People have to trust you to let you lead them, but most of these people will lead you into poverty.
I think I have to agree with this from the financial aspect . It seems he feels like he should treat himself and enjoy his money because he works 8 hours, but he is treating himself way too much, which comes at the expense of his family. He's also making bad financial decisions. If he wants her not to work, and them to have more kids and to live a prosperous life he needs to either let her help with the finances or do a better job with doing it himself and managing himself as a person.
He does need to find out how to budget, his planning is not good enough. In fact both need to do that, because in order to go the same direction they need to understand their finances.
As a father of a daughter, I will feel that I have failed as a father if my daughter ever says "personal finance is just really confusing" as an adult.
@@ma.2099 girl math is a joke that is literally about how women justify making poor financial decision. Girl math is thinking you saved money when something is 50% when u r still spending. Ppl joke around abt it, anyone who takes it seriously does not understand the concept of “girl math”
You must’ve never been in a real long term relationship. Her saying “my kids is completely insane, granted, but him saying “my car” is perfectly fine. Everything isn’t shared in relationships, he bought her a car, he can have his own car, doesn’t mean they can’t share if they don’t want to. But not everything is shared in a relationship, is it supposed to be “our” panties? “Our” makeup? “Our” tools? No they can have their own stuff, grow up. That’s what a mature relationship is.
Yeah my wife and I had to cut that out quick. It’s honestly a terrible way to have a marriage. Don’t believe people who sit there and say, “oh we’re 2 different people with our own money”, that does not fly. If you wanted to be individuals, then you shouldn’t have gotten married. I don’t wish this on anyone, but marriages like that tend to fail
"I feel like as a man I'm supposed to live below my means," he said, even though he actively lives above his means and has his kids eat HotPockets while he eats out 💀
He thinks he knows more than he does. But doesnt have the maturity to see what giving up for your family really is. Saying the grocery budget is too high when it feeds his own kids, meanwhile hes eating out. Selfish!!
Totally agree. Anytime fast food is higher or even close to groceries ESPECIALLY with kids. There is a definite problem. Only made worse by the fact it's only for himself.
makes me think each and every episode is actually not a financial crisis, but more like a pathological behavioral defect where the subjects cannot for the life of them WANT to actually LIVE, but rather delude themselves out of existence.
@@SlytherinsConspiracieswelcome to finance 😂 Also, everyone needs to remember, this is really common in these situations. This your man is used to being the most mature person in his friend group. He is very mature for a 23 year old. He’s also 23 and still immature overall. I know this story because it was mine too. My wife and I are in a wonderful spot now and we are so grateful we took the hard road like these young people but it was extremely hard and very painful at times. That’s how you learn though. Life’s not pretty, it’s beautiful
So not only does he get door dash while she is sleeping BUT HE DOESN'T EVEN CLEAN IT UP AND LEAVES IT ON THE COUCH. ugh she needs to respect herself more
@@louiseerbslisbjerg7854 he is. He’s financially abusive, at the absolute least. Also, telling his wife “there’s food in the house,” when the food is hot pockets and Mac and cheese is like its own category of abuse. Like neglect.
My ex did it too, pure narcissistic behavior (my ex husband has been diagnosed : pathological lyer, psychopath and narcissistic by a psychiatrist and neurologist
So Little Lord Babyface here is off work by 2-3pm, goofs off the rest of the day, orders door dash for himself at night while she's asleep, and leaves the trash in the living room for her to clean up? These two are a total mess but that part really set my blood pressure off 😫
honestly scared for her. i hope she starts her own savings so that if she ever decides she deserves better, she isn't trapped in a marriage because of financial obligation.
You're a horrible person you know that. Rather then suggesting they work on their marriage you straight go for divorce. They are basically kids figuring out life.
I was trapped like her and continued to live with him because I couldn't escape, I had nothing and am disabled. Narcissistic husbands/wifes are extremely dangerous mentally, physically and financially.
What don’t you get about the fact that I am a full-time I mean part-time I mean substitute teacher And a full-time actress and singer, who is just breaking into the business I don’t know anything about the projects that I am actually getting paid for but I am working at Domino’s and Uber driving even though I just got fired from Domino’s and have no idea how much I make in Uber tips…
@@benjaminfranklin329or the crazy idea of just not having a third child 😂 like you can’t live with only two children cause why? You can’t wait for 5 years and actually do it right for the first time 😂
I mean dont have another child until at least one is in a booster seat and get a cheaper car.... 21grand for a van with over 100k on it seems dumb in the first place. The guy doesnt seem like the type to work on his own car.
I get why she gets her coffee, she’s at home alone with two kids it’s probably her chance to get out of the house and if he’s getting food out all the time she can get some fancy sugary coffee every once in a while. We all know she is not the problem here other than being willfully ignorant of their finances
Not when they're in the shape they're in. She can make sugary frozen milkshakes for everyone in the family for what she spends on ONE Starbucks garbage drink. And THEY CHOSE the life they're living. Don't want to be home all day with two toddlers? DON'T have them! And him being a moron isn't justification for her being one too. That's just double stupid.
That 40yr old mom was way more mature than the 25yr old divorced mom who lives out of her car and has a warrant out for her arrest in Missouri, and begs for money on Twitter while her kid lives with her mom in a hotel
lol the 25 year old living out of her car, I mean “Car Camping,” wasn’t even divorced. She just Fu*ked off out of town and was still mooching her ‘husband’ for money. Classy.
I don't understand how an 18 year old with no credit can get a 15k limit, meanwhile I just barely got to 15-20k limits on my cards and I make 200k a year with a 780 credit score.
Because you can pay it back, they can't. Banks don't want people to pay the bare minimum. This couple will bring money to the bank for the next 50 years, you'd have paid it back in 5...
I find that weird too. I've always paid my credit card and just hit an 8k limit at 27. To be fair, I've never asked for an increase either and that's just the automatic limit increases.
I believe Chase often does this, they did for me and my friends at 18. lol (without any prior credit or being on a parent’s plan, I got a 16k limit on my first card with them)
Don't get it twisted. shes also an airhead. Theres a reason shes chosen to ignore all the "confusing stuff" in her words. The guy just doesn't really know much either @dovgidesign
@@atomknight8361nothing wrong with trusting your spouse, which is what she's choosing to do. It's also his responsibility as the provider to do his job and be selfless--he's the big failure here.
That is a huge insult to her that she plans the grocery shopping and dinners and he can't even wait until he gets home to eat the meals she cooks?! My husband loves my cooking and I'll even ask what he wants that week so if he's really wanting burgers or tacos I'll plan those into my meals for the week. We do eat out on Fridays so I have a break from cooking once a week and it gets me out of the house and it's a good weekly date night for us
Same here! Although I’m not an amazing chef, actually my husband is the one who loves cooking, I’m more of a baker, but I plan out all the meals for the day and do the grocery shopping, so I always ask what he wants for the week. We eat out occasionally on the weekends but mostly eat home cooked meals and left overs. Planning out your meals for the week really helps save money because going to the grocery store without a plan is dangerous! Lol
Ladies, don’t be clueless about your finances if you’re married even if your husband is the provider! My parents lost their home to foreclosure and my mom didn’t know until the sheriff showed up to evict them
How is he going to be upset that she accidentally signed up for photoshop and HAD to say it was like $100 a month.. Like my brother in christ you are spending that ON CHIPS..ON PURPOSE!!!
Literally, and saying that she and the kids can't eat out while he stops on his way home and freaking orders door dash AFTER she goes to bed is wild. Like he's intentionally waiting for her to go to bed so he doesn't have to buy her anything. Wild
I think this EP made me the most upset at any guest! Not to mention the ONE example he could give of her not wanting to cook dinner. I think we can all agree there are nights where we dont have the energy to cook, esp after taking care of little ones AND knowing your husband stops and gets WHATEVER he wants.. Id be resentful and wouldnt care about cooking dinner. All the financial sacrifices shouldn't come from just one partner. @@rosie20098
Bro he never tells her no because she is so far out of his league he knows it's over he doesn't smooch that backside. Edit: NGL there are a couple times he calls her BS on here...but even those times where pointing out how he was a push over. He needs to prepare himself for her to leave him if he tries to instill any fiscal disciple. Look at the face she made when Caleb told her to make coffee and put milk and sugar in it or make a meal. It was as if Caleb told her to dumpster dive for food.
She needs to take over the finances and just give him 20 bucks a week cash and thats it! I guarantee she could have them turned around in 2 years. I really think she will rock the budgeting course. She looks terrified that the money is so bad and you could tell she cared. He is more interested in his snacks than his kids.
Nah. They both have bad habits and they both need to make those changes together. The situation you proposed is just as disastrous as their current one. I'm not sure if you're married, but I'd guess you aren't. You still think like a single/dating person. Togetherness is what makes the relationship last, build, and be a betterment to each partner.
@@bbbbbbb51 been happily married 26 years. Would be much better if they worked together after they get out of debt but he needs to prove he wants it by letting her get them out. Then slowly work together to manage their money after the debt is gone. You could tell she was freaked out and felt she had no control over things. In a relationship when trust has been broken you have to earn it back over time and let the other person help you a while.
@@bbbbbbb51 They can do it together but if he doesn't have the self control and integrity to not spend on unnecessary money on his way home then yes 20 in cash so he can see what he's spending and force him to really consider if its worth what he's trying to buy. And she can manage the money as long she keeps him in the loop. She seems to have a better idea of what it takes to manage the house hold and if she is more concerned about the money she may do a better job of managing it, she just needs all the information. Each couple is different, but whoever is better at finances should take the lead and both should work on saying no and tightening thier belts when needed. The person taking the lead is still responsible for being transparent with thier spouse about where every penny is going, why and making sure they stay on track with thier financial goals. He's had a chance to manage the finances and set a budget and he didn't do so with transparency so it might as well be her turn to take lead in this area.
This is SCARY. Having 2 kids and a home on a $50k salary is absolutely insane. Thinking you can afford to use DoorDash and Starbucks when you have $120 in your checking account? You've gotta be kidding me.
I know ppl who have 1 income no debt and 5 kids based on the job I estimate they earn 70k they go on vacations every year etc. 2 kids and 50k is doable but without debt
Yep. That's exactly what I thought too. What happens when the baby gets an ear infection and you can't afford the copay OR the ear drops that are prescribed? Or both kids get them at once? I can't imagine thinking any of this was a good idea for them. I have a feeling the husband has been lying to his wife for a long time about their finances, and she bought it all hook line and sinker. I mean there's no way he is THAT good in bed.
It's very doable if you're responsible with the money but they are not! And I'm not just saying this I'm literally living it and we are very comfortable plus we live in an expensive city!
Why do I think that as the watcher of the show, the husband thought he was going to get Caleb to tell the wife to “stop spending so much” and his plan totally backfired??
@@catherine4908his age means nothing. I’ve seen grown ass 40yo+ men who behave this way. My step dad was a POS who behaved similarly. We got married the same year they did, and we’re only two years older. My husband doesn’t talk to me like this. His mother would kick his ass.
Wife: We needed groceries Dumb selfish husband: We have hot pockets and Mac and cheese at home Excuse me, Mr. “I get fast food everyday for only myself” So, only you get a fast food meal while your family scavenges at home. Nope, my anger would never put up with that.
@@ll2323Unfortunately many modern couples are stuck like this. Working retail the number of couples I’ve seen argue with their partner for buying basic items is embarrassing and sad.
It is scary! My husband would never guilt me over feeding myself and our children, and if I ever told him there was no food at home, he would get us food, no questions asked! His behavior is disgusting. 😤 My husband would never "treat" himself at the detriment of his family. GROSS! This dudde is no man.
The husband keeps saying “We” but he made essentially all of these decisions…. You can see her face change throughout the audit as she realizes that he’s been concealing how he's been tanking her financial future
When he told her there is food at home like hot pockets, cereal and that stuff I was like bro you are literally eating out multiple times a day on your own without your family. Your doordash in the middle of the night wtf
@@cococock2418this is such a toxic mentality to bring into a marriage 😂 especially a marriage with kids. He works, and she raises his babies. They both work. In a marriage you are one entity. His money is hers, her money is his. The food she makes at home is hers and the food she makes at home is his. The kids she raised are hers and the kids she raises are his. Dear god, please don’t get married and have kids until you realize the roles of parenthood.
Newsflash. He didn’t teach you anything don’t pretend you’re stupid just because they didn’t teach you that in high school your parents should’ve taught you, or you should’ve had some common sense of how it all works.
I wish this couple all the best. The last few guests were combative, highly unlikeable, and bordering on delusional. It's nice to see people who appreciate the help and will actually listen to advice instead of constantly arguing.
They seem like they're listening, sure, but are they actually listening? We don't know. Caleb needs to probe them, ask them questions, let them talk a bit more to expose whether they're actually listening. IMO.
I agree, I wish them the best too. I hope they take Caleb's advice. They have two children, a house, and he has a good job. But they are so immature, even given their very young ages. If they can restrain their spending on unnecessary things, and postpone having a third child until they are in a much more secure position, they could have a very bright future.
@@IAmebAdger It would probably be good for the guests if he asked them to repeat what he just said. Not just at the end when he asks them for a summary of what they will do, but as he goes. It would also be fun for us as we watch them show in 1080HD that they are not understanding anything lol (or give as some real hope that they are getting it)
I cannot with him saying "I work 8hrs no break, I'm just really hungry after work" no way he doesn't have a lunch break and can't take a sandwich with the doritos he stops at the gas station for everyday.
Not having a lunch break is typical in the restaurant industry. I work 10 hour shifts with no breaks except bathroom breaks. But I always take home a free meal.
@andrzej6286 it's illegal in California. I get in trouble if I dont. Plus a free meal, which every restaurant I've ever worked at has offered. Either way this guy's a tool.
Even if you have the best most loyal and hardworking spouse of all time, they could still drop dead tomorrow. You should ALWAYS know the state of your finances.
Anyone who supports a family should get life insurance. At this kids age, a million dollar term policy would probably be like $50 a month Edit to emphasize - get TERM life insurance, not a whole life policy
@@Jake38nineshe’s a stay at home mom, she’s kinda vulnerable and probably overdue to have the financials brought up on an accountability front. She needs to be more involved to avoid being dependent/trapped if things went south
@Jake38nine he's keeping her in the dark to the point she doesn't even know if she can afford certain purchases. She's also in the more vulnerable position- she's losing potential earnings by staying at home, and he's not being transparent on finances meaning she has next to no control over budgeting or non-basic purchases
@@Jake38nine Not true. She started out saying she's the spender and had to be pushed to agree that he has a spending problem, too. You're clearly biased against women and not hearing her/reality.
@@miketexas4549 Let's agree that if you are an healthy teenager (who is moderately active), you can get away with a lot more bad food decisions than when you are 30. It's not okay, and certainly not 'good', but it is not going to give you heartburn or make you feel like crap for a day or two.
@@rtre957 But you're not "getting away with it," even at a young and vibrant age - you are taking damage. It's a cumulative effect.. did you know that dementia is now being called type 3 diabetes? You don't just wake up one day chronically unhealthy, you become so through a series of thousands of bad choices, and it's almost entirely centered around nutrition.
@@rtre957 But you're not "getting away with it," even at a young and vibrant age - you are taking damage. It's a cumulative effect.. did you know that dementia is now being called type 3 diabetes? You don't just wake up one day chronically unhealthy, you become so through a series of thousands of bad choices, and it's almost entirely centered around nutrition.
Ladies, don't let society convince you that you aren't smart enough to learn finances. If you give up control to someone else, there is a chance that they might also not be good at finances and just pretend like they are. Finance knowledge isn't something you're born with, it's something you learn and anyone can learn it. If you want to stay home with the kids and not work, all power to you, but you don't need to put on blinders to the household finances because that's your money too and you have the right to know what's going on. Just because someone is the breadwinner of the home doesn't necessarily mean they know how to manage it.
It definitely doesn’t seem like she let “sOcIeTy” convince her she doesn’t need to know finances- it just sounds like she wasn’t interested in learning because she prefers to be the homemaker. Tuck that feminism back in your pocket lmao
@@GetOfflineGetGoodexactly! that is exactly why it's important for women to have a general education and job experience even if they plan on being a SAHM, life is crazy unexpected and unfortunately it's oftentimes in the worst way
Hes either unhappy, scared/anxious, or both and thats why he says "idk" to everything. Hes afraid to get to the core problem and i recognize it because ive been there and continue to work on it.
🤔 Hmmm I didn't see him being unhappy here. However, everyone is unhappy or dissatisfied about something in or about their life. We all wish something or the other was different or better. That is part of the human existence. The art is to learn to count our blessings for what we do have and find contentment there. They both have a lot to be thankful for. Each other ( so many ppl in NA trying to crack the code on finding someone to make a life with), kids (so many ppl have been trying for years to have kids), a house/home (too many ppl are homeless in NA), he has a fairly decent paying job $64000 net, he also has a potential side hustle he knows he can leverage (so many ppl are being laid off from their jobs over the past 12 months), they are healthy, have their whole life ahead of them. So many blessings. They seem to love each other which is good. For someone so young however, she seems to have agreed to let him lead her the way he has been doing, and wants to give him all the kids he wants. She just seems to want to have the kids a little more slowly than he wants. I'd be curious to know what's driving him wanting to have all the kids so quickly. I'm glad he's seeking help though with the finances.
I might be off on this, but this couple gave me such bad vibes. They blamed each other and didn't take dual ownership over anything. They seem like they aren't communicating about anything in their household and I am so annoyed hearing him say the hard water was ruining "MY toilets, MY sinks, MY tiles" like bro, that house is BOTH of yours.
It's because they got into a traditional relationship without the adult life experience of not blaming eachother and thinking the other person has it better and making it a competition.. if she had worked outside the home and he had any experience with what she's doing... They'd value each others contribution more. I think staying off this way would be so hard because it's so much easier when you have an appreciation for the other person's work .. like I've been a single mom working hard outdoor labour work.. so being stay at home mom is something I value and appreciate my husband's work but he can't lord it over me like I have no idea how hard it is.. I've done it. And he has lived on his own and done all the cooking cleaning etc.... so he understands what I'm doing. He also has shopped for groceries for just himself so he can clearly see how fabulous of a shopper I am to serve the meals I serve for 4 people for a small amount of money
This is not a "traditional " relationship. I consider myself in a traditional relationship, and my husband would never abuse me like this. It's gross. My husband and I respect and support each other and communicate what is going on. And he can clean the hard water stains off HIS sinks and toilets.
@user-dv8bs7tb5c true, but when I think "traditional," I think nurture- teacher role/provider- protector role. We support each other and assist in our roles, but one is primarily responsible for one. I stay home to nurture and teach, and I also protect and provide as much as I can. He works outside the home to provide, and he is an alert for potential threats. He is also nurturing and teaches when he is available. One person can try to do it all(single parents) but it's hard. Defined roles is the best, suited to each other's strengths. This man is harming his family and not providing for them, not even nourishing foods for his wife who is nurturing babies and recovery from almost dying with the birth of their child. I don't see any "manly" qualities in him.
"Planning a child" shouldn't only mean that you wanted a child and agreed to have one with someone. They didn't financially plan for either of their kids from what it seems.
@@danladd4764That’s not true. If you think about it for one second, it should sound ridiculous. You think the average person is paying $32k per kid? That’s the hospital bill and then most people have insurance that covers the vast majority.
@@danladd4764definitely not an average of 32k out of pocket. That might be for uninsured, but average insurance deductible is going to be probably $3k to $7500. That’s still a lot, just that what you are saying is inherently false. Also anyone spending $42k a year per kid is doing something wrong 😂. By your logic over half the population of the United States doesn’t even make enough money to cover just the kid costs 😂.
@@NerdyOutdoorVeteranit is expensive to have kids if you pay for hospital bills (no insurance) and if you add daycare costs (daycare is more expensive than college in some places). Other than that, you can keep costs fairly low if you get free/cheap baby stuff from other people (pretty easy to find) and mostly breastfeed (formula is expensive, breastfeeding is mostly free).
It kills me that she blames public education for her not knowing anything about finances but he clearly didn't learn anything useful about it from being home schooled either and has just been pretending to know things whilst getting them deeper and deeper into debt.
True, he was too confident and didnt understand enough about interest rates and debt. She screams learned helplessness, she needs to get involved and also keep her man in check. he is young and immature and definitely needs it to grow.
Let alone everything else, the disrespect of him telling her they cant eat out, but knowing shes cooking at home but stopping for junk anyway. Really he cant wait half an hour driving home to eat??
He didn’t even tell her she couldn’t eat out. He told her she couldn’t go grocery shopping. Which is 100x worse considering all their money is funding his addiction to eating out.
When the guy justifies his fast food spending cuz he “works” all day…like buddy your wife is home with two toddlers all day, do you think she’s not working???
Also, I'll never get behind this outdated mentality certain men have where they want their spouses to potentially remain unemployed at home. Have they not heard of remote work? This economy is far too inflated and overpriced for any household to rely on a single source of income (unless the head of the household happens to be a rich CEO or something).
If he works 8 hours a day and goes in at 6am like he said.. he’s done by 2pm and probably home by 2:30? She can easily get a job with an afternoon shift 3-9pm or even a service job working the dinner shift 2-3 nights a week. There are so many options if he’s home that early! I wish Caleb didn’t miss this
@chrisbailey788 I live in the same area as this couple. I literally use several of the same gas stations that were shown on their bills. Leaving at 6 is low traffic. There is minimal traffic except on specific streets until at least 7. She would still have plenty of time for an evening job.
the solution is REELING in the SPENDING-- NOT tearing their marriage further apart and creating more stress by just upping the INCOME where now both work and less time together and/or with their own kids.
@@classics-wz1bz It is also true however that for her to build some working years is likely good for her retirement or if she needs to get benefits in the future. She also needs to get active on researching what the state can do for them, especially for her if she doesn't plan to work (again, retirement)
@@theeccentric7263 She could just be processing. When my husband came clean to me about everything (long story, essentially his job was the problem and caused a large accruing of expenses, and I wasn’t on his accounts yet which is also a long story, but it wasn’t because we didn’t want our finances combined), I wasn’t angry. I just kinda processed and decided what happened had already happened, and now we needed a game plan to overcome the situation we were in. And we have. We’ll be able to afford our own house by next year. Which feels like a huge accomplishment in this economy 💀 but my husband also wasn’t a condescending jerk like this guy
@@allysmyers1605 whatever husband says go’s and financially abusive and basically she’s a dumb sahm who knows nothing and only deals with the kids while he does what he wants and blames her for everything the only other problem is in the 50’s everyone with a full time job was able to pay for normally everything
@@allysmyers1605in the 50s, it was common for women to have 0 control over what was going on and be left homeless if they divorced. It's why both my grandmas lectured all their grandkids about always having your own income. Not having any financial control was terrifying for both of them and one actually DID end up homeless after her husband left her for his affair partner. Not every husband was a good guy and there often wasn't a long dating period to get to know who your husband actually was. Some lucked out by getting with a compassionate guy. Others didn't.
Caleb sounds more relaxed and centered than the last few I watched. Good to hear you back in the zone where you might get frustrated, express where problems are, but aren't being quite as...on the offense. I usually really enjoy your content, but I had to stop watching episodes for a while. This was much better. Your heart seems to be back in it. Good to see you back to form. 😊
To be fair, these guests were actually sane. A bit foolish with eating out, but sane. The car living person and the angry pop star wanna be were both mad as a hatter.
True, he has some real intense guests, and I wasn't able to finish the insanity of a several of those and was avoiding him in my feed, but when I checked in and saw him on the offense at the start with a foolish but normal guest, I got worried about him. Maybe it was the stress of the new office or a production decision to boost drama. I don't know. This comment was mainly to let him know this style was liked provide positive reinforcement if it is a stress reduction or production decision as I am greedy and want to see more like this.😅 Anyway, hope you have a good day.
It’s because the producers gave him someone who wasnt a delusional shithead. This is all any of the people on Reddit that Caleb complained about wanted. They just wanted people who weren’t clearly clout chasers or drama dumps.
this. this right here. 21k for 100k miles is such a gamble...even if it is a Toyota. Caleb should've given them 200 bucks a month in vehicle maintenance just in case.
MY showers, MY toilets, MY towels….my my my….tracks for him getting all that fast food and gas station runs while she is at home being lied to by omission thinking they have to struggle.
They are not working as a team and it really shows. I'm a stay at home Mom, but I'm involved in all of our budgeting and financial decisions. When my husband and I talk about our situation, it's ALWAYS "our money" "our kids". I hope they got the wake up call they desperately needed, I feel he went a bit easy on them because of the kids.
Lied to by omission 🤣🥸. She just didn’t ask the right questions. There is no such thing as lying by omission. You can take that garbage somewhere else.
“He comes home every day with beer and chips” umm…are we just not going to mention this horrible coping mechanism that can easily become an addiction?! Surprised Caleb didn’t say something 😬 also did I hear that right? These people financed a Sienna for $549/mo and it has over 100K miles?! I hope I misheard that one
This couple is not on the same page at all. He said it all when he spoke about the hard water ruining everything in “my house.” “My toilets, my showers, my tiles.”
@@BradDiBenedetto Yes, when she said 'my kids' when explaining the ages I thought maybe they were just her kids and that he was a stepfather... which I would admire him for but turns out he is the father so her use of 'my' was so weird.
@@moneymike2397 In theory you are correct, however in this case I would tend to lean more towards them just being very awkward and assuming crazy gender roles. He seemed like the kind of guy that would point out in a heartbeat that they weren’t his kids, if that was the case
I hope she got out of there as someone who studied both economics and psychological development this man is a manipulator and it's so scary to watch. The fact that he made her think she was the spender by keeping her in the dark about their finances is crazy. You can literally see on her face when she realizes what's going on she looks so disappointed. You can tell she tried to get things under control and he won't listen he's either a huge man child or a genuily narcissistic person.
She knew exactly what was going on. She is just as much a manipulator as he, if you're going to swing that accusation. And fuck me; driving an hour away to Mom's place twice a week for what? That's a mega expensive latent cost (wantonly running up miles on the car for no economic benefit).
@@jonathanrabbitt I'm sorry but that's just no true. Yes, she can be a little clueless but not manipulative she truly thought she was the biggest spender when she was the biggest saver she needs out he's selfish. He is a man child it's a fact not an accusation.
@@deltagrantonio2901 She admitted telling him that they couldn't afford takeout. He'd told her that he was going deeper into debt. You can only feign ditzyness for so long before it becomes apparent that it is just an attempt to absolve responsibility.
As someone who has experience with pre-marital counseling and counseling in general, the lack of communication and teamwork here is most alarming. I know the financial element is your bag, but these two need to really open up the lines of communication about not only finances, but literally everything else. Somebody else mentioned the "my" not the "our" language which is definitely a red flag, but if they're not communicating about finances, they're not communicating about other things. It's my hope that this financial help gets them talking and on board with one another for their marriage's sake, and for their children.
I really hope she starts thinking about how financially dependent he is making her. So young, no work experience almost, no retirement money, he „manages“ the finances to his advantage… girl your husband could drop dead tomorrow or you could get a divorce (religion will not protect you from that) and then things would look NOT GOOD for you
I was just thinking about this. The reality is these traditional wife marriages are a HUGE risk. At least I'd try to get some remote work and save some money on the side for my retirement or just savings. If this man dies or decides to leave her, she'll have to start over.
I see myself in these people. Me and my ex husband got married at 19. We had 4 kids in 3 1/2 years. Bought a house at 23. Divorced by 27. Too much too fast.
Not my situation, but I have family members that made the same choices and it's a slow motion car wreck. Every once and awhile it works out but having kids and a mortgage that early and being a one income household in this economy is going to be rough.
I can't believe he had the gall to criticise her for wanting to eat something other than hot pockets or mac and cheese for dinner, meanwhile he turns his nose up at *free* acai bowls and juice at work. The nerve.
@@frogfinance4605That’s a hot take. She absolutely has her own issues, and she’s not perfect, but to say she’s as bad as him? He tells her “there’s food in the house,” when she asks to go grocery shopping. The food is fucking hot pockets and Mac and cheese. Ngl, I’m a SAHM and we aren’t well off, but I have never fed my kids a hot pocket. I very rarely make them Mac and cheese. I make actual meals that last us for a few days with fresh ingredients depending on what’s on sale at the grocery store. I can’t imagine being hungry and wanting to go to the grocery store for fresh ingredients and my husband telling me, “there’s food in the house,” and coming home with some food for himself and letting his children eat literal cardboard with 0 nutritional value. wtf. Also, his spending is out of control. She bought clothes for her children (once upon a child is a resale store like Plato’s closet but for children, so not even NEW clothes), I think I counted 3 coffees, and then she said something about Marshall’s, but I didn’t hear a charge for that. Everything else was him! She cares about the daycare her children would go to, and he tried to tattle on her over that like some kinda “gotcha.” Wtf, with all the horror stories I’ve heard about daycares, yeah, I’d be picky too!!! I haven’t let anyone other than family watch our kids ever! She’s offered to get a job, he told her no, and he keeps her entirely in the dark about their finances. I’m sorry, but no. This man is not only a majority of the problem, blatantly walking into poor financial decisions and taking advantage of his wife’s ignorance, but he totally absolves himself of any and all accountability! And the way he said, “the hard water is destroying everything in MY house. MY floors, MY toilets, blah blah blah.” Dude, you’re insane if you think she’s as bad as this guy. She at least considers and values her children. This dude would have them eat nothing but fucking hot pockets if it meant he could keep up his habit of eating out every damn day.
It’s not his money to do whatever he wants with. It’s not his house to put a freaking HELOC on to account for his poor habits. It all equally belongs to them both, and he needs to involve her. If she’s really the one who doesn’t want to be involved, which I don’t entirely buy, she needs to put her big girl pants on and tell him to stop spending money every time his heart wants some chicken nuggies or whatever.
She's saving him daycare money, and being she doesn't have a degree to earn higher than that... That is what she's 'earning' for the family 'bring home'.... He thinks he deserves more than her because he 'works' outside the home... Which is gross.
40 hour work week is average He's acting like he is slaving away, working 8 hours a day at a place where he probably gets a lunch break. Meanwhile, wife is 24/7 taking care of kids and house. They are supposed to be equal partners
It doesnt work unless she starts working part time, and he helps out around the house as well. but if she wants to be a trad wife, she needs to start learning how to cook, which it sounds like she doesnt do very well. but most of this is his behavioural issues, and perhaps learned helplessness from her. he needs someone to keep him in check to grow out of this. which i hope caleb helped with
Ikr. I laughed out loud at that. Mf......try slinging a chainsaw, hunched over a rock saw, running wheelbarrows of material uphill, shoveling snow, or even just running around with a weed Wacker 15hrs a day 6days a week and 8 on the seventh day....... telling Charlie he needs to cook the chicken longer, making sure the new soda cups are ordered, and autofilling a schedule so that Janet gets her nieces birthday off is not a brutal job. Sure kids have the ability to make everything stressful, but either adapt and teach them the right way or learn to keep your gear wrapped.
Holy cow, the amount of times this 23 year old said "I don't know" to Caleb's questions and then says "I know" as soon as Caleb gives him the answer just shows that no matter how mature he thinks he is, he is still a child and chooses to be oblivious to the effects of his own choices
When she said she wakes up in the middle of the night for the kids and he said "no I do that", she gave him a VERY "why would you call me out like that" look
As a former homeschooler I'm willing to go out on a limb and confirm, the head scarf thing she's wearing and the ages of everything are a dead giveaway
Sounds like they took advantage of a state gov. program. In concept i agree with it, if renting is an option i see no reason why ownership should not be. Of course those programs ended up becoming scams that the gov did nothing about.
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It's Paddy, not Patty.
Yeah calling it st pattys day is so cringe.
@@FMeister94 Let me guess. You also spell colour “C O L O R” ….. so cringe.
@@CapitalThrift But Patrick is spelled with a t, not Padrick
I love the Kiss me I have an emergency fund shirt 😂
the way the husband nitpicks her accidentally spending $100 in one month and he purposefully spends thousands a month on useless crap is beyond me
They are going nowhere fast with wo young children in that mix. They need some long term counseling and she needs to get her @ss to work!
@@Meanoldwoman2013She has two babies. Daycare and the added income taxes would leave them negative. You should learn more about finances.
She has two babies. Daycare and added income taxes would leave them negative. The only difference is the babies would be raised by strangers.
3:26 that glance. “My wife is going to find out what’s up today”
Almost 1400 on BS he spent. Absolutely insane. I’m sure she made up some of that. But like $300 off is still $1100 which is still a huge portion just in HIM alone
This nice young couple's problem is that their traditional family lifestyle has no traditional family frugality
THIS ⬆️⬆️⬆️⬆️💯 I bet if she spent a very short amount of time watching homesteading type videos/ meal prep/ couponing or enveloping videos on UA-cam she could make massive changes in their household. Of course, he’d have to stop spending like he does and get on the same page w her first
@@Beserious795 I have said elsewhere - to me it's wild that she thinks finances are not part of the package of what a stay home mom does.
Traditionally women run the day-to-day finances of a household. Sure, women could not have credit cards and before that even own property, men were needed to approve for the bigger purchases, and they would maybe review at the end of the month or whatever, but the day-to-day it was the woman who managed the finances!
@@Beserious795 that would require him to stop saying: "Your food sucks" and then order doordash.
And it would require her to stop letting the d-head do it as well.
@@rtre957literally, this is what happens in Japan, the husband deposits his pay check to his wife & she will give HIM an allowance of disposable income
To be honest, idk how long it is even going to make sense for her to stay home. Western countries have a huge leg up over other countries because both genders participate in the economy. Families having a single earner is like fighting with one arm tied behind your back. You have lower savings and only a single retirement and you don’t benefit from the career progression and higher income potential of two parents. No college savings, no vacation budget, and you are more likely to borrow against your assets to make emergency spending needs.
I love how he said "she's the spender" and literally most of the money spent is 90% him.
She’d see that if she was more involved in the finances
It’s probably what he tells her. Plus the guilt that she doesn’t bring in any money
@Juann-je8gq She may think that but, most of the problem with spending is him. Blowing all the money on fast food..
Yup. I scrimped and did without for 26 years because “we didn’t have much money” we “cost” my ex so much money. Once I started looking into the finances ($2000 a month for him to eat out) and surprise I discovered an affair. Now I “get” a nice portion of his money each month. I think he really believed I was the one “wasting” money.
And that's the problem when you give up financial independence
“I will say she’s picky about which daycare” says the dude who’s too picky for supermarket chips…
No BUT LITERALLY!! Bro would rather send $2 on a bag of air at the gas station DAILY when a $5 bag at the store would last at least a week
Fr and childcare is something you SHOULD be somewhat choosey about. Like, those people will be raising your child when you're unavailable. Who you choose to do that matters a LOT.
@@xxbeccabrutalityxx7873 UNLESS you are a stay at home mom....
@@joanpearl7184 What? She said that she offered to go to work, that was the reason for the daycare.
@@greciarojas1799some people like to hear themselves talk
Going for a third high risk pregnancy with two little ones at home, no health insurance, no money and a clueless second parent is wild.
They have ACA insurance (discussed at 43:00). That's one reason he's hesitant to side hustle - make more, and their subsidy will decrease😟
Yeah, but when people wait until they’re older and smarter, they don’t have enough kids Lol
Nothing about that is WILD
@@sanjicook08 yes it is WILD when she could potentially DIE and leave her children motherelss with just the father. Yes, indeed it is WILD.
@@sanjicook08yeah that's incredibly stupid to do. It was stupid of them to even have the second kid.
I love it when the person who controls the finances thinks their partner is the big spender but in reality, they are.
Dude it was the same in my marriage
I spend money on the kids he spend money on himself
And I was the problem
Like he literally stopped at the gasstation every day for taquitos and spend 400€ on one shirt
Now I have a lot less money but I am better off😅
He did say he spent a lot on small things
She was the one who said she was the spender.
@@janinakoppei read a study showing men spend the money on themselves and women on the house/children
@@m1sh474a singular study almost means nothing due to potential funding bias, whether it was even conducted properly or peer reviewed! Find meta analysis’ of such which complies all data, looks at bias, analyses and concludes all info/data given to provide an outcome of said meta analysis
Finally some people who actually seem like they're not here for clout.
They were so calm and collected. Massively refreshing
SO AGREE... Refreshing and sound innocent just learning life ahah
I think they got caught early enough in their nonsense that they've got hope to change for the better
No kidding, seems like someone wanting the help without being defensive or argumentative at any criticism
Finally, some people who don't seem crazy. Just young, keep working at it.
She is saving money by buying used clothing for her children at Once Upon A Child while he is eating out every day. She is a lot more financially responsible than he is.
Sort of. She could be making him meals for work & snacks for the way home, but she doesn't. They both have work to do, but they're more than capable of making those changes together.
Why should she make him food when, she is already taking care of the kids?
She does tho. It was in the video. She prepares him food which he does not eat because he likes DoorDash better.
@@bbbbbbb51 hes an adult who can make his own lunch, not another of her toddlers/babies.
He is the child he looks as. She simply has 3 children.
These kids finally have an adult in the room so they are snitching on each other.
Such a good description lmao
Omg 100% they could not wait to tattle on each other LOL
Lol
This😂
“These kids” ThEsE KiDS, 😂 they are adults, but okiee.
She is more capable than she thinks she is. Treating him like he’s the “smart one” and finances are “so confusing” to her is going to sink her and her children.
Some people don’t want to work or have to learn a lot. It’s trippy to me but it happens. I agree she has a lot of potential even enough to form a whole career but I don’t think that’s something she wants to
Kids need two smart and informed parents. She's using weaponized incompetence as an excuse. Not that hard to learn how to use a calculator and create a budget. What on earth is she going to do with her family if something happens to him?
She’s setting herself for serious financial abuse
My mom did this for years until she learned the hard way my dad was bad with money (Like the people on this channel.) She sucked it up, learned, and started managing the money. Today she's a multi millionaire from her investments, even though they never earned much. So proud of her.
It’s “weaponized incompetence” from her.
The audacity for him to tell her they have “food at home” but he’s getting Starbucks, fast food, beer and Doritos, and/or DoorDash daily?!?
He is a complete moron but trust me she's no better. I guarantee you it's half and half. sometimes she's willing to cook other time she's like I've been watching these two babies all day can you please just pick something up on your way home. it's not all him, it's obvious
I was thinking the same - he was like "There's hot pockets" 💀dude, what?
@@klgonzalezful yeah he meant for BOTH of them to eat that night.
She probably can’t cook… I would
Seriously. What a jerk.
HIM: gaslights his wife into thinking she's too dumb to understand their finances and that it would be a burden on her, spends money everyday getting juices, Starbucks, chips and bs at the gas station, eats fast food after work everyday and gets door dash when his wife is asleep, refuses to eat what his wife cooks at home with groceries and insists he should eat out instead because he "gets really hungry after working an 8 hour day", cash advances his wages every month, blames their debt and out-of-control spending on his wife, bought an expensive unnecessary car to accommodate a potential 3rd child that they can't afford and will probably endanger the life of his wife due to pregnancy complications but doesnt even use the car to transport the kids in anyway, won't let his wife eat out when there's nothing at home suitable to feed young children saying hotpockets are suitable for babies
HER: accidentally spent $100 on adobe one time
41 minutes in and I think I can see where the problem lies here...
He’s so horrible thank you for laying it out like this fr. People say sexism isn’t real but the comments prove it very much is.
Shes not an infant. Nobody gaslit her. She didn't want to do anything about it. He only cash advanced $100 that isn't needed at all because between the two of them they are wasting thousands in comfort food. He doesn't need any damn juice or coffee. She should be working with him to cook food in advance so he doesn't have to think about it at work. The problem is they are living above their means. They didn't need a new vehicle. They didn't need to keep paying on an old car either. If he's not driving he doesn't need a vehicle at all. He could be dropped off at work and he could ride with coworkers. He could be driving a damn scooter or a motorcycle and not spend thousands. She also could have been getting paid to work on jobs at home that do not require being on the phone. Shes probably spending a ton of money on online games. They didn't go into the cell phone usage either.
@@Deneteus HE* is spending their money on fast food that they CANNOT afford and hoarding his money while his INFANTS have to eat hot pockets and she thinks they have less than they do. He will be a fat alcoholic and his kids will be malnourished in no time. All of the reckless spending (the fcking car and $900 of food on top of groceries) was HIM. Behind her back
@@Deneteusyou're just... Inventing her spending money on apps though. Like where did you get that from.
what makes you think she was gaslit?!
"Our communication is very good, aside from the one aspect that is *literally the most common reason for divorce* ."
Money and s e x, most common reasons for divorce and a lot of other crimes from theft to un-aliving.
@@joelwillems4081 But a sex problem usually stems from lack of communication.
Technically second most. But you can be WAY more proactive about finances than preventing your partner from being a ho
Money is a myth or at least has dropped significantly.
Last I checked now its "irreconcilable differences" which most of the time means the wife cheated
Communication which encompasses all issues
Then the lie that is finances because getting divorced will hurt your finances most of the time if you're a man.
@@KCville6324stay off the red pill podcasts my boy.
If you’re saying there’s food at home and by food you mean hot pockets you’re too young to be someone’s dad
You clearly dont have kids
@@NM-ki9ih it’s fine as a snack for a kid but it’s not food for dinner
@@grimeythree4294 you clearly don’t have kids
@@NM-ki9ihI just hope you don’t have kids
@@NM-ki9ih or maybe I’m a better parent?😂
The fact that he gets free food and juice at his store. And he gets fast food and the type of juice that isn't free is freaking crazy.
Facts!! Every food/bevy job I’ve worked, my grocery / eating out bill gets cut in half. It really helps to have a shred of discipline.
He is a self indulgent jerk.Not very bright.He has absolutely no self control.He spends money on crap.
Agreed. Take advantage of benefits.
and by the sounds of it has a meal cooked for him at home, yet must get food before getting home!!1! (long commute to work??) - surely she'd also feel a bit upset that he's not around for that/eating what she's making etc.
That's completely insane
This man deliberately gaslighted his wife about their financial situation claiming she doesn’t understand even though he’s running them into the ground with them both clueless blaming each other
Probably wanting to make her feel dumb so he can feel like the big man. So sad.
Ahhh excuse me, she herself said it confuses her and she doesn't want any part of it. How is that gaslighting?
@secondfoundation4137 if he has spend those years constantly telling her she wouldn't understand or it's too complicated for her she would internalise that and freely admit its "too confusing". Basically her agreeing to that doesn't disprove the gaslighting accusation, and could feed into it.
That being said I also don't think there is enough evidence here to suggest that he is guilty of those accusations either.
@@mch-gaming1437You have no clue about that. Its really crazy to see ppl trying to make him out to be some horrible man. What is wrong with you guys
@@ronnie5329because he is a horrible man, he financially abuses his family. He clearly has no clue about finances but acts like he’s some financial guru making dumb decisions and getting them deeper into dept 😂
Them thinking having kids in a year and a half is not soon is WILD. That’s basically tomorrow in adult time.
Yes lol
That means your pregnant in 4 to 6 months
I was thinking the same thing. lol
Nothing about that is WILD
Early twenties is barely adult time. It doesn't start flying until 30.
Him denying her a meal out for being tired with the kids and not wanting to cook but deciding to get his own meals out multiple times a day lol and then her in the beginning thinking she’s the one with the spending problem when three retailers on the pink highlights were hers
If I get take out, so does my wife. I don't think twice about it. I'll ask what she wants and grab it. Fair is fair lol. He'll I'll grab takeout for her even when I eat at home. She might crave something from the outside world when I am just wanting a ham sandwich. This whole seperate this and that thing is weird. Being married is like being both people at the same time. Equal say, no secrets, and the spouse is always and automatically considered at all times. Personally I cut back on frivolous things so I can spoil my wife, but she doesn't expect that.
But there's hot pockets...😒
@@darlene5286😂😂😂
both things are wrong
She probably sucks at cooking
I cannot fathom having two children, being in massive debt, and continuing to purchase Doritos and beer from a gas station every day. This kid's father failed him.
My guess is nobody calls this guy on anything in that household. He needs a third party, like Caleb, to call him out.
His parents failed them.
To be fair, a present father that’s in debt is much better than a father out of the picture - you can’t inherit debt. Children don’t need cash they need support imo
He hasn't failed. He doesn't know any better, but luckily there is still time. Hopefully this interaction with a financial advisor will encourage a change for the better.
Add student debt and being 40. It can always be worst
21,000 car with over 100,000 miles at 9% interest. That car salesman is a villain!
That's what I was thinking. My jaw dropped when he said what the mileage was
@@suzbone Like I get they are probably trying to do things on their own. But was there any consulting? Where was the family or someone to look out for them?
@@koodersalad427 Amen to that. While it could be that they're a couple of stubborn little shits who can't stand taking advice specifically from family, I feel it's FAR more likely that both of their families seriously failed them in a lot of ways.
toyota siennas are soo freaking expensive me and my husband were looking into them and even the old used ones are insanely priced lol
Yah, I agree.
Even though this couple is pretty awkward, it was soooooo nice to have an episode where the people could actually answer questions directly.
She did, did he though? He just said “I don’t know” to everything
@@Jo-lw5dm hahaha yes you're right. lol! I think I was too excited that it seemed somewhat normal.
Only problem was they gave 2 different answers 😂
This one was one of the least crazy ones we've had in a while. I hope they get their shit together. Rooting for them
It's nice to see a couple that seems to actually like each other. She does need to be more involved and not be all "Christian trad wife" though.
Him saying “my mortgage” and ruining everything in “my home” is a huge red flag.
She also says "my kids" very weird
They aren't bought into the marriage, shit is just transactional.
@@graciearson I’m not always the most conscious of saying “our kids” over “my kids.” I find myself correcting myself a lot when I say that to my husband. I have an easier time with assets like, “our car,” or “our house,” or whatever. Couldn’t tell you why, but he’s a very active dad, and I love him to death. 😂 it’s just a weird idiosyncrasy I have. But you could be right about that.
@@allysmyers1605 Well I think "my kids" is more common for parents in general to say, but I think the red flag here is that both the husband and the wife are being territorial over their domains. Even the fact that the wife was totally clueless on finances, like that shouldn't be gatekeeped by the man. I think the combo of those are the biggest red flag for these two specifically.
@@Pinkiiiiii9 oh totally. I don’t even understand why they’re married. 🙃
Bro has rules for himself and telling his wife that they can't eat out but he eats out every day. That's crazyyyy
Bro this is like every married zoomer right now. Like fuck off. Their is steps to getting to family income. Not just drop a kid in a debra at McDonald’s 😂
Well he’s at work. It’s not that deep.
@@ryan-rk3fshe manages a restaurant and only works 40hrs pw. He definitely has time to meal prep and can take advantage of free food at his work. Dumb dumb dumb.
He doesn't love her. Pure and simple
@@zaynmalice7106 Just because you work in a restaurant doesn't mean you get free food. Been in the restaurant business my entire life and the only time we got "free food" was way earlier in my life when I was working at a buffet. Otherwise you're required to pay for your food. Also 40 hours a week is full-time, so the only way he can get extra time/over time is if his boss offers it to him. You don't decide for yourself that you're going to work overtime.
I'm really curious where you got these points/how you arrived at them because neither one of them proves anything.
Also him being the restaurant manager still means that there's a boss over him, which is why he would still have to abide by all the same rules as all the other employees. All of this is very well known information that any one who has ever worked in a handful of restaurants would know.
Also what about the wife? She's at home all day long. Why can't he just buy groceries at the end of his shift and then SHE does the meal prep while sitting at home?
I feel bad for her. It’s obvious she went from living with family to immediately living with a husband/kids. She has no idea how capable she is.
She is a very capable mother. She clearly loves her kids very much.
you should watch mouse utopia.
and keep in the back of your mind the western trend with SKleading the way is the downfall of modernity, .6kids per female - insane rapid depop. will be 4% current in 4 gens
She even said she enjoys/prefers watching over her kids and house
@@vbrown4610that does not matter at all. She thinks she’s less capable
@@LunaDarkFallno she doesn't what did she say to make u even think that
“We have two kids, and we can’t afford them, and I almost died having the last one, but we want at least one more” 🎉
Make it make sense
Right 😭
The math ain't mathing
Same people that had 2 kids when they couldn’t support themselves. Not surprising.
stupid people usually procreate a lot
She is smarter than him, she needs to take some control back.
She needs to take accountability and stop relying on someone because it’s stressful. They both decided to have children they both should work and figure out childcare. You adapt you don’t just say “well I can’t “
@@montoya26 Working or not doesn't matter. My mum is a stay-at-home mum and she has always had a metal grip on our finances, even more so than my dad. It's not a matter of being more or less intelligent than him (it's toxic tk make this kind of paragons, especially jn a couple), but a matter of not wanting to have to deal with problems and using the "intelligence" excuse to avoid them. I used to do it with my brother a lot too, once. If you just say the other is "more intelligent" and let him do all the work because of it, than it's YOUR fault for not being updated of your situation.
@@gauntlettcf5669 My parents have been married over 25 years. Step mom was stay at home until very recently when the last kid is finally grown up and she wanted to fill out her ss. Best believe for all those years she counted every dollar in and out of that household. It really doesn't work unless both people are 100% on the ball. Has to be a partnership not just equaling up to one adult.
We vere young. My husband is good at working. He is an idiot financially. So I took over it all
@@montoya26He may well have gaslit her into believing that it’s stressful - rather than helping and teaching. But this is because he doesn’t want to expose his poor decisions and mismanagement
The subtle rage in her eyes when Caleb said the husbands spending on going out to eat would have covered the credid card payments that he took a LOAN out to pay....ooof
at which part?
@@antwspoon57:42
Imagine flipping the script on him and informing him he effectively took out a loan to eat out. Insane
The husband is a financial abuser, PERIOD. Thank you so much for showing people how this actually happens
For real!! I also didn’t realize until watching this video that you could be a financial abuser when you have no money…
That’s such projection, PERIOD!
You and I have no clue how this couple is aside from this one hour glimpse into their finances. Stop judging a book by its cover.
You lack critical thinking skills
@@Sniperboy5551 😆
@@ktzach11 you lack money and a wife
Hot pockets and mac and cheese should never be an acceptable dinner for your kids, as a dad. This guy is clueless and blames everything on his wife, and the wife blindly trusts him.
Yeah, all the while ordering and eating Door Dash while she's sleeping on. She's better than me.
Not everyone has as refined a palate as you. When you're broke, cheap food is what will keep you alive.
@mulletsquirrel It's not that he said that out of necessity; it's the hypocrisy that makes his suggestion terrible. I've survived off of basically crumbs before, too, and it is absolutely better than nothing. However, when this guy is getting all of his food out, it's outrageous to then turn around and say that the children can eat the cheap, heavily processed food with no vegetables.
@@chibivampiregirl good point. That type of imbalance makes for an unhappy relationship.
@@mulletsquirrel Well you shouldn't have children if you can't afford to give them the food they need to grow properly. I will admit that my child absolutely ate hot pockets and mac and cheese though. But there were veggies and fruit served with every meal and veggies in the mac and cheese always lol.
Having multiple kids with only 500 bucks in the account is terrifying. They are one medical emergency away from bankruptcy.
Not even. $100!!
I get the feeling that mommy and daddy on both sides keep them floating..
YOu know that the majority of people on earth have no savings - having saving is rare.
And the people in charge don't want you to have savings, they want you to be constantly desperate for money and be able to do anything to get it and compete for it, they don't want people to be comfortable.
They flat out cannot afford another child but yet they're planning on another in a year or so. That's so irresponsible!
Honestly they have debt and alot of it but not to say they living bad. Just need to be an adult more and stop spending like kids with no responsibility. Many millions in our country are like this. Zero concept of what it takes to raise children and how much money it truly takes to live comfortably. But the reality is tons of Americans are forced to live this way he makes above 50k a year and the average pay in the USA is 34k who's perception off now. Seems like most ppl in these comment sections. Easy to say someone is messing up if you have never experienced low income in reality.
They’re so young they don’t even have a sense of time yet. When they started talking about a third kid and said “No time soon” i thought they meant 3-5 years not 1!!
Its literally insane that they could wait EIGHT YEARS to have another child and still BARLEY hit the median age for having your FIRST kid in most western countries 😮😂😂
Having kids at a young age is generally a good thing. But they definitely need to wait before having more.
@@countrymusicandcher8593just as being like the average American when it comes to debt and consumer spending is not a good thing, nor is waiting that long to have kids.
@@Macca-95 Lmao 30 is fine for having kids. Literally nothing wrong with it. She's 22, 22 + = 30. The danger, if any, realistically starts around 35.
Their brains aren’t done developing.
This dude doordashes wingstop while having $100 in his checking account with a family to support, what a POS
Idk if I’d go as far as as saying his a pos but he definitely and financial midget
That guy is a lousy 'household leader', spends like a drunken sailor on himself while barely having money left for the family at home who entirely depend on him.
You got it
She picked him. It's clear he's a pathetic man-child, so it's on her for settling for this zero.
And then males throw a tantrum because women don't "let them lead".
People have to trust you to let you lead them, but most of these people will lead you into poverty.
I think I have to agree with this from the financial aspect . It seems he feels like he should treat himself and enjoy his money because he works 8 hours, but he is treating himself way too much, which comes at the expense of his family. He's also making bad financial decisions.
If he wants her not to work, and them to have more kids and to live a prosperous life he needs to either let her help with the finances or do a better job with doing it himself and managing himself as a person.
He does need to find out how to budget, his planning is not good enough. In fact both need to do that, because in order to go the same direction they need to understand their finances.
As a father of a daughter, I will feel that I have failed as a father if my daughter ever says "personal finance is just really confusing" as an adult.
Tbh, that makes me feel as though you are an excellent father to her. And you'll be swatting down that girl math and help her understand real math ^
@@ma.2099that's literally a joke
Agreed. A good parent would never set their child up for delusion.
@@ma.2099 girl math is a joke that is literally about how women justify making poor financial decision. Girl math is thinking you saved money when something is 50% when u r still spending. Ppl joke around abt it, anyone who takes it seriously does not understand the concept of “girl math”
Your daughter is lucky to have you! A lot of dads (and moms) don't understand personal finance, themselves. You're breaking the cycle.
I don't like their separatism in the relationship. "My kids" she says and he says "My mortgage, my car"
I noticed this too, I feel there is a personal story to this situation. Definitely seeing marital problems in there future.
You must’ve never been in a real long term relationship. Her saying “my kids is completely insane, granted, but him saying “my car” is perfectly fine. Everything isn’t shared in relationships, he bought her a car, he can have his own car, doesn’t mean they can’t share if they don’t want to. But not everything is shared in a relationship, is it supposed to be “our” panties? “Our” makeup? “Our” tools? No they can have their own stuff, grow up. That’s what a mature relationship is.
Super weird vibes with the 'my kids' comments.
It's not that strange. They are her kids and they are his kids. They can be both "mine" and "ours" at the same time.
Yeah my wife and I had to cut that out quick. It’s honestly a terrible way to have a marriage. Don’t believe people who sit there and say, “oh we’re 2 different people with our own money”, that does not fly. If you wanted to be individuals, then you shouldn’t have gotten married. I don’t wish this on anyone, but marriages like that tend to fail
"I feel like as a man I'm supposed to live below my means," he said, even though he actively lives above his means and has his kids eat HotPockets while he eats out 💀
Yeah, his hypocrisy and his lack of self awareness are breathtaking. The kid's a narcissist, complete with the gaslighting he's been doing to her.
He thinks he knows more than he does. But doesnt have the maturity to see what giving up for your family really is. Saying the grocery budget is too high when it feeds his own kids, meanwhile hes eating out. Selfish!!
I doubt he thinks he knows more than he does. His problem is that he is immature. He is unwilling to sacrifice his wants for his families needs.
Totally agree. Anytime fast food is higher or even close to groceries ESPECIALLY with kids. There is a definite problem. Only made worse by the fact it's only for himself.
makes me think each and every episode is actually not a financial crisis, but more like a pathological behavioral defect where the subjects cannot for the life of them WANT to actually LIVE, but rather delude themselves out of existence.
@@SlytherinsConspiracieswelcome to finance 😂
Also, everyone needs to remember, this is really common in these situations. This your man is used to being the most mature person in his friend group. He is very mature for a 23 year old. He’s also 23 and still immature overall.
I know this story because it was mine too. My wife and I are in a wonderful spot now and we are so grateful we took the hard road like these young people but it was extremely hard and very painful at times. That’s how you learn though. Life’s not pretty, it’s beautiful
So not only does he get door dash while she is sleeping BUT HE DOESN'T EVEN CLEAN IT UP AND LEAVES IT ON THE COUCH. ugh she needs to respect herself more
So glad someone said this, I about lost my mind.
I would be PISSED
My bet is he's abusive in some way.
He wants to control it all, it sounds.
@@louiseerbslisbjerg7854 he is. He’s financially abusive, at the absolute least. Also, telling his wife “there’s food in the house,” when the food is hot pockets and Mac and cheese is like its own category of abuse. Like neglect.
My ex did it too, pure narcissistic behavior (my ex husband has been diagnosed : pathological lyer, psychopath and narcissistic by a psychiatrist and neurologist
Him saying “we got food at home” and it’s hot pockets and kraft mac and cheese. The wife and kids get crap, but it’s ok for him to order DoorDash??
So Little Lord Babyface here is off work by 2-3pm, goofs off the rest of the day, orders door dash for himself at night while she's asleep, and leaves the trash in the living room for her to clean up?
These two are a total mess but that part really set my blood pressure off 😫
And he's getting cash advances from his job burning 4% every time
Little lord babyface 😂😂😂
Dude could eat fast food 10 days a week instead of 25 and save 200$ a month, the amount of immaturity is crazy
I thought this too! I'd hate and loathe him right quick! His face pisses me off. 😆
honestly scared for her. i hope she starts her own savings so that if she ever decides she deserves better, she isn't trapped in a marriage because of financial obligation.
Her own savings on what ? She's not making any money....
She's already trapped, and she seems fine with it. She wants ANOTHER child when they can't even afford the two they already have.
You're a horrible person you know that. Rather then suggesting they work on their marriage you straight go for divorce. They are basically kids figuring out life.
@@harveypolanski755 because it’ll fix things.
I was trapped like her and continued to live with him because I couldn't escape, I had nothing and am disabled. Narcissistic husbands/wifes are extremely dangerous mentally, physically and financially.
Oh thank God when he asked what they do for work and how much they make it was an actual answer. It's been a minute.
😂😂
Yeah, I'm so used to people coming on the show not knowing what they make and have like 15 side hustles that cost more than they bring in 😂
What don’t you get about the fact that I am a full-time I mean part-time I mean substitute teacher And a full-time actress and singer, who is just breaking into the business I don’t know anything about the projects that I am actually getting paid for but I am working at Domino’s and Uber driving even though I just got fired from Domino’s and have no idea how much I make in Uber tips…
✔️
@vforvendettaMA 😂😂😂
Justifying purchasing a car you can't afford for an additional child you MIGHT have in the future is not a wise decision.
Right?!… To that point this guy needs a vasectomy yesterday.
The thing about the child seats was crazy, the cost of getting the narrower, more expensive seats is nothing on the cost of a new car
@@benjaminfranklin329or the crazy idea of just not having a third child 😂 like you can’t live with only two children cause why? You can’t wait for 5 years and actually do it right for the first time 😂
I mean dont have another child until at least one is in a booster seat and get a cheaper car.... 21grand for a van with over 100k on it seems dumb in the first place. The guy doesnt seem like the type to work on his own car.
I cant 100% rule out that i might have a child out of wedlock as the result of one of my drunken one night stands.... I should get a tesla
I get why she gets her coffee, she’s at home alone with two kids it’s probably her chance to get out of the house and if he’s getting food out all the time she can get some fancy sugary coffee every once in a while. We all know she is not the problem here other than being willfully ignorant of their finances
Sounds like it’s her only small pleasure while he’s a junk food junkie.
Not when they're in the shape they're in. She can make sugary frozen milkshakes for everyone in the family for what she spends on ONE Starbucks garbage drink. And THEY CHOSE the life they're living. Don't want to be home all day with two toddlers? DON'T have them! And him being a moron isn't justification for her being one too. That's just double stupid.
Somehow these two are still more mature than the 40yr old mom who came in last week.
That 40yr old mom was way more mature than the 25yr old divorced mom who lives out of her car and has a warrant out for her arrest in Missouri, and begs for money on Twitter while her kid lives with her mom in a hotel
@@awill3454right! So maybe the next episode will be a reasonable mature person.
@@awill3454 Totally forgot about her.
lol the 25 year old living out of her car, I mean “Car Camping,” wasn’t even divorced. She just Fu*ked off out of town and was still mooching her ‘husband’ for money. Classy.
@@elizabethbarrett5303lmao
I don't understand how an 18 year old with no credit can get a 15k limit, meanwhile I just barely got to 15-20k limits on my cards and I make 200k a year with a 780 credit score.
Possibly because 4 years ago money was cheaper. Good returns for the finance company getting someone into debt as soon as legally possible, too.
Because you can pay it back, they can't.
Banks don't want people to pay the bare minimum. This couple will bring money to the bank for the next 50 years, you'd have paid it back in 5...
I don't understand how an 18year old with no credit can get a mortgage
I find that weird too. I've always paid my credit card and just hit an 8k limit at 27. To be fair, I've never asked for an increase either and that's just the automatic limit increases.
I believe Chase often does this, they did for me and my friends at 18. lol (without any prior credit or being on a parent’s plan, I got a 16k limit on my first card with them)
She is putting all her faith in this clueless guy. 🤦♀️
Seriously.. my exact thought was that they'd be way better off if he listened to her instead of her listening to him. She seems a lot more mature.
Don't get it twisted. shes also an airhead. Theres a reason shes chosen to ignore all the "confusing stuff" in her words. The guy just doesn't really know much either @dovgidesign
Seriously. How terrifying.
Here I am struggling to find a woman like this, and he’s just throwing it away. What a dumbass.
@@atomknight8361nothing wrong with trusting your spouse, which is what she's choosing to do. It's also his responsibility as the provider to do his job and be selfless--he's the big failure here.
That is a huge insult to her that she plans the grocery shopping and dinners and he can't even wait until he gets home to eat the meals she cooks?! My husband loves my cooking and I'll even ask what he wants that week so if he's really wanting burgers or tacos I'll plan those into my meals for the week. We do eat out on Fridays so I have a break from cooking once a week and it gets me out of the house and it's a good weekly date night for us
😂 maybe she can even make him those taquitos he loves so much!! 🎉
Same here! Although I’m not an amazing chef, actually my husband is the one who loves cooking, I’m more of a baker, but I plan out all the meals for the day and do the grocery shopping, so I always ask what he wants for the week. We eat out occasionally on the weekends but mostly eat home cooked meals and left overs. Planning out your meals for the week really helps save money because going to the grocery store without a plan is dangerous! Lol
Ladies, don’t be clueless about your finances if you’re married even if your husband is the provider! My parents lost their home to foreclosure and my mom didn’t know until the sheriff showed up to evict them
GEEEZ!
Yup. My ex hid everything from me and ultimately ….. it imploded
Wow. That's a really shitty thing for your dad to have done.
You totally hear about that!! It’s crazy!!
Rip 🪦
How is he going to be upset that she accidentally signed up for photoshop and HAD to say it was like $100 a month.. Like my brother in christ you are spending that ON CHIPS..ON PURPOSE!!!
He was trying to hammer her for that as if he didn’t spend way more on eating out lol
That too!!!
@@SP-qv8ex
Literally, and saying that she and the kids can't eat out while he stops on his way home and freaking orders door dash AFTER she goes to bed is wild. Like he's intentionally waiting for her to go to bed so he doesn't have to buy her anything. Wild
I think this EP made me the most upset at any guest! Not to mention the ONE example he could give of her not wanting to cook dinner. I think we can all agree there are nights where we dont have the energy to cook, esp after taking care of little ones AND knowing your husband stops and gets WHATEVER he wants.. Id be resentful and wouldnt care about cooking dinner. All the financial sacrifices shouldn't come from just one partner. @@rosie20098
For under $100 a month you can get all Adobe products including Photoshop, even cheaper if you sign up on black Friday
The couple episodes are always wild 💀I'm 30 seconds in and I already know its going to be a roller-coaster.
I love couples audits
2 for 1 audit but somehow the problems feel 4x as much
Bro he never tells her no because she is so far out of his league he knows it's over he doesn't smooch that backside.
Edit: NGL there are a couple times he calls her BS on here...but even those times where pointing out how he was a push over. He needs to prepare himself for her to leave him if he tries to instill any fiscal disciple. Look at the face she made when Caleb told her to make coffee and put milk and sugar in it or make a meal. It was as if Caleb told her to dumpster dive for food.
@@davenunyabusiness4893 Exept she isn't. What is in any way special about her?
@@MrDerushingo she is indeed average...it's more a comment on him
She needs to take over the finances and just give him 20 bucks a week cash and thats it! I guarantee she could have them turned around in 2 years. I really think she will rock the budgeting course. She looks terrified that the money is so bad and you could tell she cared. He is more interested in his snacks than his kids.
He can make a big turnaround, too. Her same deficiencies are the same as hers, immaturity.
Nah. They both have bad habits and they both need to make those changes together. The situation you proposed is just as disastrous as their current one. I'm not sure if you're married, but I'd guess you aren't. You still think like a single/dating person. Togetherness is what makes the relationship last, build, and be a betterment to each partner.
@@bbbbbbb51 been happily married 26 years. Would be much better if they worked together after they get out of debt but he needs to prove he wants it by letting her get them out. Then slowly work together to manage their money after the debt is gone. You could tell she was freaked out and felt she had no control over things. In a relationship when trust has been broken you have to earn it back over time and let the other person help you a while.
How do you figure?
@@bbbbbbb51 They can do it together but if he doesn't have the self control and integrity to not spend on unnecessary money on his way home then yes 20 in cash so he can see what he's spending and force him to really consider if its worth what he's trying to buy. And she can manage the money as long she keeps him in the loop. She seems to have a better idea of what it takes to manage the house hold and if she is more concerned about the money she may do a better job of managing it, she just needs all the information. Each couple is different, but whoever is better at finances should take the lead and both should work on saying no and tightening thier belts when needed. The person taking the lead is still responsible for being transparent with thier spouse about where every penny is going, why and making sure they stay on track with thier financial goals. He's had a chance to manage the finances and set a budget and he didn't do so with transparency so it might as well be her turn to take lead in this area.
This is SCARY. Having 2 kids and a home on a $50k salary is absolutely insane. Thinking you can afford to use DoorDash and Starbucks when you have $120 in your checking account? You've gotta be kidding me.
And planning to get pregnant again in the next 6 months...
I know ppl who have 1 income no debt and 5 kids based on the job I estimate they earn 70k they go on vacations every year etc. 2 kids and 50k is doable but without debt
Yep. That's exactly what I thought too. What happens when the baby gets an ear infection and you can't afford the copay OR the ear drops that are prescribed? Or both kids get them at once? I can't imagine thinking any of this was a good idea for them. I have a feeling the husband has been lying to his wife for a long time about their finances, and she bought it all hook line and sinker. I mean there's no way he is THAT good in bed.
It's very doable if you're responsible with the money but they are not! And I'm not just saying this I'm literally living it and we are very comfortable plus we live in an expensive city!
He is on 90k a year he makes 5350 per month post tax
Why do I think that as the watcher of the show, the husband thought he was going to get Caleb to tell the wife to “stop spending so much” and his plan totally backfired??
i got that vibe too
He definitely thinks he’s more grown than he is
@@catherine4908his age means nothing. I’ve seen grown ass 40yo+ men who behave this way. My step dad was a POS who behaved similarly.
We got married the same year they did, and we’re only two years older. My husband doesn’t talk to me like this. His mother would kick his ass.
Wife: We needed groceries
Dumb selfish husband: We have hot pockets and Mac and cheese at home
Excuse me, Mr. “I get fast food everyday for only myself”
So, only you get a fast food meal while your family scavenges at home. Nope, my anger would never put up with that.
Definition of financial abuse and coercion in a relationship if I’ve ever seen it, even if neither one of them realize that’s what it is.
@@Chikitewsounds like they live in the 60s.
@@ll2323Unfortunately many modern couples are stuck like this. Working retail the number of couples I’ve seen argue with their partner for buying basic items is embarrassing and sad.
It is scary! My husband would never guilt me over feeding myself and our children, and if I ever told him there was no food at home, he would get us food, no questions asked!
His behavior is disgusting. 😤
My husband would never "treat" himself at the detriment of his family. GROSS! This dudde is no man.
But their communication is good
The husband keeps saying “We” but he made essentially all of these decisions….
You can see her face change throughout the audit as she realizes that he’s been concealing how he's been tanking her financial future
He says "we" when it's the responsibilities. He says "my" when it's the assets and possessions.
@@jordanledoux197I noticed that. “My house.” “My car.”
He’s very well spoken on how bad he is with finances
When he told her there is food at home like hot pockets, cereal and that stuff I was like bro you are literally eating out multiple times a day on your own without your family. Your doordash in the middle of the night wtf
ok and? he works for his money. she doesn't. you eat at home if you don't bring in the cash.
@@cococock2418this is such a toxic mentality to bring into a marriage 😂 especially a marriage with kids. He works, and she raises his babies. They both work.
In a marriage you are one entity. His money is hers, her money is his. The food she makes at home is hers and the food she makes at home is his. The kids she raised are hers and the kids she raises are his.
Dear god, please don’t get married and have kids until you realize the roles of parenthood.
He’s a manager of his restaurant why doesn’t he eat there? He’s acting like a child.
Newsflash. He didn’t teach you anything don’t pretend you’re stupid just because they didn’t teach you that in high school your parents should’ve taught you, or you should’ve had some common sense of how it all works.
@cococock2418 he helped make those kids and she's raising them, while he's spending ridiculously on take out
I wish this couple all the best. The last few guests were combative, highly unlikeable, and bordering on delusional. It's nice to see people who appreciate the help and will actually listen to advice instead of constantly arguing.
They seem like they're listening, sure, but are they actually listening? We don't know. Caleb needs to probe them, ask them questions, let them talk a bit more to expose whether they're actually listening. IMO.
I agree, I wish them the best too. I hope they take Caleb's advice. They have two children, a house, and he has a good job. But they are so immature, even given their very young ages. If they can restrain their spending on unnecessary things, and postpone having a third child until they are in a much more secure position, they could have a very bright future.
Agreed, it’s nice that they’re actually having a reasonable conversation
@@IAmebAdger It would probably be good for the guests if he asked them to repeat what he just said. Not just at the end when he asks them for a summary of what they will do, but as he goes.
It would also be fun for us as we watch them show in 1080HD that they are not understanding anything lol (or give as some real hope that they are getting it)
100%! They really seem to want to learn. I’m super rooting for them. A wonderful change from the ding dongs who just want to be on video.
Girl, please be involved in the finance.
If these guys divorce, she can't survive on her own.
Also, he is already the third child. Please, stop it.
based
I cannot with him saying "I work 8hrs no break, I'm just really hungry after work" no way he doesn't have a lunch break and can't take a sandwich with the doritos he stops at the gas station for everyday.
Not having a lunch break is typical in the restaurant industry. I work 10 hour shifts with no breaks except bathroom breaks. But I always take home a free meal.
@@andrzej6286 at least in Canada that’s definitely illegal. Especially for 10 hours? You could most likely sue them for it.
i don't think he would buy coffe if he hadn't had lunch no one would eat a burger and then go and buy white chocolote mocha or something
@andrzej6286 it's illegal in California. I get in trouble if I dont. Plus a free meal, which every restaurant I've ever worked at has offered. Either way this guy's a tool.
@@lumenx7499 it's state specific here. Arizona gives no fucks so it's super common here and in alot of other red states
Even if you have the best most loyal and hardworking spouse of all time, they could still drop dead tomorrow. You should ALWAYS know the state of your finances.
I agree.
Anyone who supports a family should get life insurance. At this kids age, a million dollar term policy would probably be like $50 a month
Edit to emphasize - get TERM life insurance, not a whole life policy
You can tell she has been wanting to just unload all of this to someone. She’s super duper quick to point out all of his bad spending habits
@@Jake38nineshe’s a stay at home mom, she’s kinda vulnerable and probably overdue to have the financials brought up on an accountability front. She needs to be more involved to avoid being dependent/trapped if things went south
@Jake38nine he's keeping her in the dark to the point she doesn't even know if she can afford certain purchases. She's also in the more vulnerable position- she's losing potential earnings by staying at home, and he's not being transparent on finances meaning she has next to no control over budgeting or non-basic purchases
@@Jake38nine Not true. She started out saying she's the spender and had to be pushed to agree that he has a spending problem, too. You're clearly biased against women and not hearing her/reality.
They are SO YOUNG. 😬
She's an adult@@bdrex23
I love how he has an attitude about the Adobe subscription but that $100 is a few days of his food after work..
Also how could she possibly have been aware when he keeps her in the dark about finances!?
That’s the two DoorDash a week that he has, wings, fees, tip, etc
We went from man who pretended to not be hungry during the great depression so their kids could eat to this dude.
I get the wife saying there is no food at home. Hot pockets and Macaroni and cheese for dinner is okay if you're like 12.
Inflammatory food with no nutritional value is not okay for any age.
@@miketexas4549 Let's agree that if you are an healthy teenager (who is moderately active), you can get away with a lot more bad food decisions than when you are 30.
It's not okay, and certainly not 'good', but it is not going to give you heartburn or make you feel like crap for a day or two.
@@rtre957 But you're not "getting away with it," even at a young and vibrant age - you are taking damage. It's a cumulative effect.. did you know that dementia is now being called type 3 diabetes? You don't just wake up one day chronically unhealthy, you become so through a series of thousands of bad choices, and it's almost entirely centered around nutrition.
@@rtre957 But you're not "getting away with it," even at a young and vibrant age - you are taking damage. It's a cumulative effect.. did you know that dementia is now being called type 3 diabetes? You don't just wake up one day chronically unhealthy, you become so through a series of thousands of bad choices, and it's almost entirely centered around nutrition.
@@rtre957 I don't agree. There's no such thing as "getting away with" bad food choices. You are taking damage, no matter how old you are.
Ladies, don't let society convince you that you aren't smart enough to learn finances. If you give up control to someone else, there is a chance that they might also not be good at finances and just pretend like they are. Finance knowledge isn't something you're born with, it's something you learn and anyone can learn it. If you want to stay home with the kids and not work, all power to you, but you don't need to put on blinders to the household finances because that's your money too and you have the right to know what's going on. Just because someone is the breadwinner of the home doesn't necessarily mean they know how to manage it.
amazingly based comment.
It definitely doesn’t seem like she let “sOcIeTy” convince her she doesn’t need to know finances- it just sounds like she wasn’t interested in learning because she prefers to be the homemaker. Tuck that feminism back in your pocket lmao
@@pabloescobarschanclasgenuinely don’t think you know what based means bubba.
@@GetOfflineGetGoodexactly! that is exactly why it's important for women to have a general education and job experience even if they plan on being a SAHM, life is crazy unexpected and unfortunately it's oftentimes in the worst way
@@BasedHyperboreanfeminism wouldn't care, as its her choice to be a homemaker.
Very happy that these people arent using this for clout and need it. BRING GUESTS LIKE THIS ON MORE CALEB
he's unhappy in the marriage , so he's "pretending" to be single, he need to grow up, and she needs a money management course
He’s unhappy??? He’s lazy lol he doesn’t do anything. He gets whatever he wants and has an obedient wife. Good luck finding another one like that
Hes either unhappy, scared/anxious, or both and thats why he says "idk" to everything. Hes afraid to get to the core problem and i recognize it because ive been there and continue to work on it.
and afraid to confront things to her
🤔 Hmmm I didn't see him being unhappy here. However, everyone is unhappy or dissatisfied about something in or about their life. We all wish something or the other was different or better. That is part of the human existence. The art is to learn to count our blessings for what we do have and find contentment there.
They both have a lot to be thankful for. Each other ( so many ppl in NA trying to crack the code on finding someone to make a life with), kids (so many ppl have been trying for years to have kids), a house/home (too many ppl are homeless in NA), he has a fairly decent paying job $64000 net, he also has a potential side hustle he knows he can leverage (so many ppl are being laid off from their jobs over the past 12 months), they are healthy, have their whole life ahead of them. So many blessings.
They seem to love each other which is good. For someone so young however, she seems to have agreed to let him lead her the way he has been doing, and wants to give him all the kids he wants. She just seems to want to have the kids a little more slowly than he wants. I'd be curious to know what's driving him wanting to have all the kids so quickly. I'm glad he's seeking help though with the finances.
She needs to leave this selfish loser.
I might be off on this, but this couple gave me such bad vibes. They blamed each other and didn't take dual ownership over anything. They seem like they aren't communicating about anything in their household and I am so annoyed hearing him say the hard water was ruining "MY toilets, MY sinks, MY tiles" like bro, that house is BOTH of yours.
It's because they got into a traditional relationship without the adult life experience of not blaming eachother and thinking the other person has it better and making it a competition.. if she had worked outside the home and he had any experience with what she's doing... They'd value each others contribution more. I think staying off this way would be so hard because it's so much easier when you have an appreciation for the other person's work .. like I've been a single mom working hard outdoor labour work.. so being stay at home mom is something I value and appreciate my husband's work but he can't lord it over me like I have no idea how hard it is.. I've done it.
And he has lived on his own and done all the cooking cleaning etc.... so he understands what I'm doing.
He also has shopped for groceries for just himself so he can clearly see how fabulous of a shopper I am to serve the meals I serve for 4 people for a small amount of money
This is not a "traditional " relationship. I consider myself in a traditional relationship, and my husband would never abuse me like this. It's gross. My husband and I respect and support each other and communicate what is going on.
And he can clean the hard water stains off HIS sinks and toilets.
@@labrigful you can call your relationship whatever you want to. Go nuts lol
@user-dv8bs7tb5c true, but when I think "traditional," I think nurture- teacher role/provider- protector role. We support each other and assist in our roles, but one is primarily responsible for one. I stay home to nurture and teach, and I also protect and provide as much as I can. He works outside the home to provide, and he is an alert for potential threats. He is also nurturing and teaches when he is available. One person can try to do it all(single parents) but it's hard. Defined roles is the best, suited to each other's strengths.
This man is harming his family and not providing for them, not even nourishing foods for his wife who is nurturing babies and recovery from almost dying with the birth of their child. I don't see any "manly" qualities in him.
@@labrigfulit seems pretty traditional but they’re just too young to do it right
"Planning a child" shouldn't only mean that you wanted a child and agreed to have one with someone. They didn't financially plan for either of their kids from what it seems.
It is insane , just having the child at the hospital is average of 32k out of pocket and 42k a year wtf are they thinking
@@danladd4764That’s not true. If you think about it for one second, it should sound ridiculous. You think the average person is paying $32k per kid? That’s the hospital bill and then most people have insurance that covers the vast majority.
@@danladd4764definitely not an average of 32k out of pocket. That might be for uninsured, but average insurance deductible is going to be probably $3k to $7500. That’s still a lot, just that what you are saying is inherently false. Also anyone spending $42k a year per kid is doing something wrong 😂. By your logic over half the population of the United States doesn’t even make enough money to cover just the kid costs 😂.
@@NerdyOutdoorVeteranit is expensive to have kids if you pay for hospital bills (no insurance) and if you add daycare costs (daycare is more expensive than college in some places). Other than that, you can keep costs fairly low if you get free/cheap baby stuff from other people (pretty easy to find) and mostly breastfeed (formula is expensive, breastfeeding is mostly free).
They were children when they had kids themselves
Did anyone else notice how he constantly said “my house, my car” about very obviously shared property?
Yeah! And she only says “my kids!”
@@elizabethrochester6930that was super interesting to me …
You're in to deep buddy
Women overthink the strangest shit y’all 😂
And she did the same with the kids
It kills me that she blames public education for her not knowing anything about finances but he clearly didn't learn anything useful about it from being home schooled either and has just been pretending to know things whilst getting them deeper and deeper into debt.
True, he was too confident and didnt understand enough about interest rates and debt. She screams learned helplessness, she needs to get involved and also keep her man in check. he is young and immature and definitely needs it to grow.
Let alone everything else, the disrespect of him telling her they cant eat out, but knowing shes cooking at home but stopping for junk anyway. Really he cant wait half an hour driving home to eat??
Or even eat the free food his work offers. Gotta pay for food.
Really, take a snack, eat some peanuts in the car to tide you over.
Buy a box of snacks at the discount grocery store and pack a cooler.
And could grab a free snack, meal and drink from his job instead🤦♀️
He didn’t even tell her she couldn’t eat out. He told her she couldn’t go grocery shopping. Which is 100x worse considering all their money is funding his addiction to eating out.
When the guy justifies his fast food spending cuz he “works” all day…like buddy your wife is home with two toddlers all day, do you think she’s not working???
Which is way harder than most jobs tbf
THIS!
Absolutely. You can tell she holds resentment by the way he only worries about feeding HIMSELF. He’s not the family man that he thinks he is.
And she said she has food ready and he STILL goes and gets something.
Also, I'll never get behind this outdated mentality certain men have where they want their spouses to potentially remain unemployed at home. Have they not heard of remote work?
This economy is far too inflated and overpriced for any household to rely on a single source of income (unless the head of the household happens to be a rich CEO or something).
If he works 8 hours a day and goes in at 6am like he said.. he’s done by 2pm and probably home by 2:30? She can easily get a job with an afternoon shift 3-9pm or even a service job working the dinner shift 2-3 nights a week. There are so many options if he’s home that early! I wish Caleb didn’t miss this
That was exactly my thought too.
Probably leaves at six, not sure what his commute is
@chrisbailey788 I live in the same area as this couple. I literally use several of the same gas stations that were shown on their bills. Leaving at 6 is low traffic. There is minimal traffic except on specific streets until at least 7. She would still have plenty of time for an evening job.
the solution is REELING in the SPENDING-- NOT tearing their marriage further apart and creating more stress by just upping the INCOME where now both work and less time together and/or with their own kids.
@@classics-wz1bz It is also true however that for her to build some working years is likely good for her retirement or if she needs to get benefits in the future. She also needs to get active on researching what the state can do for them, especially for her if she doesn't plan to work (again, retirement)
She's like a real trad wife, not the "I make my own butter and bread" type, but the real 50s scary type
Wdym, genuinely curious
She could be if she respected herself more. She’s subtly angry in some parts of this video. She should be enraged imo.
@@theeccentric7263 She could just be processing. When my husband came clean to me about everything (long story, essentially his job was the problem and caused a large accruing of expenses, and I wasn’t on his accounts yet which is also a long story, but it wasn’t because we didn’t want our finances combined), I wasn’t angry. I just kinda processed and decided what happened had already happened, and now we needed a game plan to overcome the situation we were in. And we have. We’ll be able to afford our own house by next year. Which feels like a huge accomplishment in this economy 💀 but my husband also wasn’t a condescending jerk like this guy
@@allysmyers1605 whatever husband says go’s and financially abusive and basically she’s a dumb sahm who knows nothing and only deals with the kids while he does what he wants and blames her for everything the only other problem is in the 50’s everyone with a full time job was able to pay for normally everything
@@allysmyers1605in the 50s, it was common for women to have 0 control over what was going on and be left homeless if they divorced. It's why both my grandmas lectured all their grandkids about always having your own income. Not having any financial control was terrifying for both of them and one actually DID end up homeless after her husband left her for his affair partner.
Not every husband was a good guy and there often wasn't a long dating period to get to know who your husband actually was. Some lucked out by getting with a compassionate guy. Others didn't.
“Your payment is so high because you got something you just can’t afford.” Damn that’s real and lots of people need to hear that.
Caleb sounds more relaxed and centered than the last few I watched. Good to hear you back in the zone where you might get frustrated, express where problems are, but aren't being quite as...on the offense. I usually really enjoy your content, but I had to stop watching episodes for a while. This was much better. Your heart seems to be back in it. Good to see you back to form. 😊
To be fair, these guests were actually sane. A bit foolish with eating out, but sane. The car living person and the angry pop star wanna be were both mad as a hatter.
True, he has some real intense guests, and I wasn't able to finish the insanity of a several of those and was avoiding him in my feed, but when I checked in and saw him on the offense at the start with a foolish but normal guest, I got worried about him. Maybe it was the stress of the new office or a production decision to boost drama. I don't know. This comment was mainly to let him know this style was liked provide positive reinforcement if it is a stress reduction or production decision as I am greedy and want to see more like this.😅 Anyway, hope you have a good day.
This episode was so refreshing compared to some of the delusional guests I've seen
It's a fine line to walk for him sometimes. I stopped watching for a while too.
It’s because the producers gave him someone who wasnt a delusional shithead. This is all any of the people on Reddit that Caleb complained about wanted.
They just wanted people who weren’t clearly clout chasers or drama dumps.
21k for a van with over 100k miles??? What in the world
I did a triple take when I heard the 100k miles bit.
this. this right here. 21k for 100k miles is such a gamble...even if it is a Toyota. Caleb should've given them 200 bucks a month in vehicle maintenance just in case.
The car market has been wacky since 2020
Toyota Siennas specifically have an absolutely stupid resale value.
For a Toyota that’s not unheard of.
Natalie, since you have a house, you should consider opening up a daycare. That way you can be at home with the kids and work at the same time.
Or even casual babysitting... In my state if you babysit only 2 kids you don't need to open a legal daycare
MY showers, MY toilets, MY towels….my my my….tracks for him getting all that fast food and gas station runs while she is at home being lied to by omission thinking they have to struggle.
Exactly. He sees their property as his property. He needs to understand that when you get married, there is no more "my". It is all "ours"
She said "my kids" not our
She did the same thing earlier
They are not working as a team and it really shows. I'm a stay at home Mom, but I'm involved in all of our budgeting and financial decisions. When my husband and I talk about our situation, it's ALWAYS "our money" "our kids". I hope they got the wake up call they desperately needed, I feel he went a bit easy on them because of the kids.
Lied to by omission 🤣🥸. She just didn’t ask the right questions. There is no such thing as lying by omission. You can take that garbage somewhere else.
“He comes home every day with beer and chips” umm…are we just not going to mention this horrible coping mechanism that can easily become an addiction?! Surprised Caleb didn’t say something 😬 also did I hear that right? These people financed a Sienna for $549/mo and it has over 100K miles?! I hope I misheard that one
Yup I looking for the same car… with 100,000 they wanted 20k with payment $450 and. I was like no thx lol
This was a giant red flag to me too. That's a massive money sink. Also is this guy polishing off a 6 pack every other day or so?
As someone with binge eating disorder that lost a lot of money due to it... I wouldn't be surprised if this guy was one of us
This couple is not on the same page at all. He said it all when he spoke about the hard water ruining everything in “my house.” “My toilets, my showers, my tiles.”
Add to that her constantly saying “my kids” and you get a really deep look into the dynamics of their relationship
@@BradDiBenedetto Yes, when she said 'my kids' when explaining the ages I thought maybe they were just her kids and that he was a stepfather... which I would admire him for but turns out he is the father so her use of 'my' was so weird.
@@jin394 just because they are his own paper doesn’t mean they are his biologically.
@@moneymike2397 In theory you are correct, however in this case I would tend to lean more towards them just being very awkward and assuming crazy gender roles. He seemed like the kind of guy that would point out in a heartbeat that they weren’t his kids, if that was the case
@moneymike2397 Definitely didn't get the vibe they weren't his biologically. They been together since 17-18. I HOPE THEYRE HIS 😂
I hope she got out of there as someone who studied both economics and psychological development this man is a manipulator and it's so scary to watch. The fact that he made her think she was the spender by keeping her in the dark about their finances is crazy. You can literally see on her face when she realizes what's going on she looks so disappointed. You can tell she tried to get things under control and he won't listen he's either a huge man child or a genuily narcissistic person.
my thoughts exactly
When he was saying "My mortgage"..."My escrow account"...dude you're married, it's "OUR"
She knew exactly what was going on. She is just as much a manipulator as he, if you're going to swing that accusation.
And fuck me; driving an hour away to Mom's place twice a week for what? That's a mega expensive latent cost (wantonly running up miles on the car for no economic benefit).
@@jonathanrabbitt I'm sorry but that's just no true. Yes, she can be a little clueless but not manipulative she truly thought she was the biggest spender when she was the biggest saver she needs out he's selfish. He is a man child it's a fact not an accusation.
@@deltagrantonio2901 She admitted telling him that they couldn't afford takeout. He'd told her that he was going deeper into debt. You can only feign ditzyness for so long before it becomes apparent that it is just an attempt to absolve responsibility.
As someone who has experience with pre-marital counseling and counseling in general, the lack of communication and teamwork here is most alarming. I know the financial element is your bag, but these two need to really open up the lines of communication about not only finances, but literally everything else.
Somebody else mentioned the "my" not the "our" language which is definitely a red flag, but if they're not communicating about finances, they're not communicating about other things. It's my hope that this financial help gets them talking and on board with one another for their marriage's sake, and for their children.
I really hope she starts thinking about how financially dependent he is making her. So young, no work experience almost, no retirement money, he „manages“ the finances to his advantage… girl your husband could drop dead tomorrow or you could get a divorce (religion will not protect you from that) and then things would look NOT GOOD for you
From the looks of it, that's the goal.
"she is making herself"
I was just thinking about this. The reality is these traditional wife marriages are a HUGE risk. At least I'd try to get some remote work and save some money on the side for my retirement or just savings. If this man dies or decides to leave her, she'll have to start over.
I hope when the kids are old enough she will put herself through school or a part time job or something
@@leadrecruitershe? So what he’s automatically gonna pick up the child rearing?
I hate that the husband keeps referring to items as "mine" rather than ours.
You mean like how she called their kids “my oldest” and “my youngest”
@@nickb9369 youll notice with this audience if there's a man anywhere near this they just shit on him.
@@nickb9369I mean she literally said my kids, I feel like that is worse….
But idk maybe my woman brain is off
He says we when talking about his debt
Women do this all the time.
I love the pie chart showing "necessary food" and "BS food"
I see myself in these people. Me and my ex husband got married at 19. We had 4 kids in 3 1/2 years. Bought a house at 23. Divorced by 27. Too much too fast.
Idk man maybe for you but you can’t put your situation on others. You were immature doesn’t mean everyone else could be
Projecting a tad bit. You made the same mistakes. Their case could still be different, but probably not.
@@twinkletoes8094 I don't wish my outcome on them.
Man these replies are jerks. Her seeing herself isn’t projecting. She’s just sharing her experience.
Not my situation, but I have family members that made the same choices and it's a slow motion car wreck. Every once and awhile it works out but having kids and a mortgage that early and being a one income household in this economy is going to be rough.
A man is suppose to make sacrifices for his wife n kids not the other way around. They scavenging at home n he out here supersizing his orders.
I can't believe he had the gall to criticise her for wanting to eat something other than hot pockets or mac and cheese for dinner, meanwhile he turns his nose up at *free* acai bowls and juice at work. The nerve.
@@pollystye3270 She's just as bad as he is.
That's because he ain't a man, he's a child.
@@frogfinance4605That’s a hot take. She absolutely has her own issues, and she’s not perfect, but to say she’s as bad as him? He tells her “there’s food in the house,” when she asks to go grocery shopping. The food is fucking hot pockets and Mac and cheese. Ngl, I’m a SAHM and we aren’t well off, but I have never fed my kids a hot pocket. I very rarely make them Mac and cheese. I make actual meals that last us for a few days with fresh ingredients depending on what’s on sale at the grocery store. I can’t imagine being hungry and wanting to go to the grocery store for fresh ingredients and my husband telling me, “there’s food in the house,” and coming home with some food for himself and letting his children eat literal cardboard with 0 nutritional value. wtf.
Also, his spending is out of control. She bought clothes for her children (once upon a child is a resale store like Plato’s closet but for children, so not even NEW clothes), I think I counted 3 coffees, and then she said something about Marshall’s, but I didn’t hear a charge for that. Everything else was him!
She cares about the daycare her children would go to, and he tried to tattle on her over that like some kinda “gotcha.” Wtf, with all the horror stories I’ve heard about daycares, yeah, I’d be picky too!!! I haven’t let anyone other than family watch our kids ever!
She’s offered to get a job, he told her no, and he keeps her entirely in the dark about their finances.
I’m sorry, but no. This man is not only a majority of the problem, blatantly walking into poor financial decisions and taking advantage of his wife’s ignorance, but he totally absolves himself of any and all accountability! And the way he said, “the hard water is destroying everything in MY house. MY floors, MY toilets, blah blah blah.” Dude, you’re insane if you think she’s as bad as this guy. She at least considers and values her children. This dude would have them eat nothing but fucking hot pockets if it meant he could keep up his habit of eating out every damn day.
I hate that he’s gatekeeping her food while he buys whatever he wants including free açaí bowls. He’s working but she’s also contributing as a SAHM
SAHM is not feasible in 2024. Especially at $60k a year..she needs to get a JOB.
It’s not his money to do whatever he wants with. It’s not his house to put a freaking HELOC on to account for his poor habits. It all equally belongs to them both, and he needs to involve her. If she’s really the one who doesn’t want to be involved, which I don’t entirely buy, she needs to put her big girl pants on and tell him to stop spending money every time his heart wants some chicken nuggies or whatever.
She's saving him daycare money, and being she doesn't have a degree to earn higher than that... That is what she's 'earning' for the family 'bring home'.... He thinks he deserves more than her because he 'works' outside the home... Which is gross.
40 hour work week is average
He's acting like he is slaving away, working 8 hours a day at a place where he probably gets a lunch break. Meanwhile, wife is 24/7 taking care of kids and house. They are supposed to be equal partners
It doesnt work unless she starts working part time, and he helps out around the house as well. but if she wants to be a trad wife, she needs to start learning how to cook, which it sounds like she doesnt do very well. but most of this is his behavioural issues, and perhaps learned helplessness from her. he needs someone to keep him in check to grow out of this. which i hope caleb helped with
Ikr. I laughed out loud at that. Mf......try slinging a chainsaw, hunched over a rock saw, running wheelbarrows of material uphill, shoveling snow, or even just running around with a weed Wacker 15hrs a day 6days a week and 8 on the seventh day....... telling Charlie he needs to cook the chicken longer, making sure the new soda cups are ordered, and autofilling a schedule so that Janet gets her nieces birthday off is not a brutal job. Sure kids have the ability to make everything stressful, but either adapt and teach them the right way or learn to keep your gear wrapped.
Holy cow, the amount of times this 23 year old said "I don't know" to Caleb's questions and then says "I know" as soon as Caleb gives him the answer just shows that no matter how mature he thinks he is, he is still a child and chooses to be oblivious to the effects of his own choices
These two really are throwing each other under the bus. That’s the most worrying thing about this episode.
I thought I was the only one to notice
Ratting each other out every 10 seconds 😂
When she said she wakes up in the middle of the night for the kids and he said "no I do that", she gave him a VERY "why would you call me out like that" look
It's very immature. They should have gotten the pre marriage counseling to know how damaging that can be.
🎯
I am speculating here, but I am getting strong “be fruitful and multiply” vibes from this couple and that would explain A LOT.
My hubby asked if they were fundamental Christians, and I’m inclined to say YES
He was homeschooled so … definitely fundies.
100% That's the only reason to get married and have kids that young... Brainwashing.
As a former homeschooler I'm willing to go out on a limb and confirm, the head scarf thing she's wearing and the ages of everything are a dead giveaway
Like what?
The emotional immaturity here is strong. He needs to cut back and she needs to be seen as an equal that can be and has to be more involved.
"We used to be really good with our finances, we bought a house at 18"
"Our house cost $20"
Sounds like they took advantage of a state gov. program.
In concept i agree with it, if renting is an option i see no reason why ownership should not be.
Of course those programs ended up becoming scams that the gov did nothing about.
casually buys a house right after high school....right
I love the irony of having credit card ads pop up in the middle of watching Financial Audit
They know they target audience
I get do many doordash ads 😂
Use actuals braincells and remove the ads... Are you 5 ?
@@tokebak4291 on phone?
Doesn’t pop up for me 🤷
This couple is the definition of what not to do when starting a family