How To Get Through Life's Most Difficult Situations | Amor Fati
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- Опубліковано 27 вер 2024
- If it happened, then it was meant to happen.
The great German philosopher Friedrich Nietzsche would describe his formula for human greatness as amor fati-a love of fate. “That one wants nothing to be different, not forward, not backwards, not in all eternity. Not merely bear what is necessary, still less conceal it….but love it.”
The Stoics were not only familiar with this attitude but they embraced it. Two thousand years ago, writing in his own personal journal which would become known as Meditations, Emperor Marcus Aurelius would say: “A blazing fire makes flame and brightness out of everything that is thrown into it.” Another Stoic, Epictetus, who as a crippled slave has faced adversity after adversity, echoed the same: “Do not seek for things to happen the way you want them to; rather, wish that what happens happen the way it happens: then you will be happy.”
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Many years ago, I heard Amor Fati put this way. "If someday, you will look back on this and laugh, you may as well skip ahead and laugh about it now."
How powerful
I love that! Thanks for sharing...I'm going to steal it 🙂
As a mother of an autistic child, I learned how to use this life changing experience not only to accept the challenge but to use it to learn more about disability and educate others about it🌻
How did you do it? My son is 19 and I still struggle with guilt, resentment, abs envy.
🙏thank you for sharing
Having the privilege of being a special needs parent as well, I acknowledge you and the journey that you have chosen, and will continue to choose over and over again. Acceptance, being present, actively choosing life, is a gift you give yourself and others, especially your children.
Please do. As a disabled man, that was physically and emotionally abused by my mother and father. Abandonment and lack of love, added to the already struggling aspects we suffer in society and ourselves. You, as mother’s, have the power and place, to champion that kids life. Don’t do them wrong. Because that karma will come back to you someday. You are the conduit of the universe for them.
Inspiring! Prayers ans good wishes...🌱
Thank you. My husband had a life changing fall last week and I’m watching this just before going to visit. It gives me strength.
What happened? You can share if you want.
Goodluck Abigail 💛
I hope things go well and that you are your husband can cope.
🙏🏽🙏🏽
Good luck to you and your husband
The presumption is that where we are now is a good place. I started with intense emotional abuse. Now I am 50. I live in abject poverty on my own with very little family and friends. I am not abused any more because I worked hard to overcome the ways that I was taught to be. I live in a caravan on a farm. The farm is not mine but it is beautiful and peaceful. I live with my cat and my dog. I have started an online tutoring business and it has been successful so far. It's not much. I don't know if I'd be happy to have suffered so much, but I have to say I do love working for myself, and I do experience peace and joy and even elation on a daily basis from very small things. Is that what you mean by you wouldn't be the person you are today. It seems such a tiny achievement. :)
But it's not. It's huge.🤗
Most of us don’t have a “Ford” friend offering us a million to start over again. Keep elevating!
You Are Really Someone Special. CONGRATULATIONS! Just Keep Doing what you're Doing. 💟
Keep on, keeping on..stay positive. Believe it or not I know how you feel. Keep in touch if you’d like a new friend. ✌️🕊☮️
I am sorry that you have been through so much. It sounds like you’re not only surviving, you are learning how to thrive. You are part of a small percentage of people who have not only recognized their situation but had the courage to escape from it and to learn its lessons. Good luck to you on your journey and I wish you peace and happiness.
I’m dealing with an autoimmune disease that has no cure and very few treatments. I’ve been struggling with the idea of my own body “fighting” me. But this disease is killing me. So I am working on keeping my mind, body, and spirit at peace with one another. I don’t want a war. Thank you, this is the right message at the right time. 🙏
Look into the carnivore diet. it hugely helped my autoimmune condition, reducing my symptoms
I found palnts, especially spinach, made my symptoms worse
Have lupu,nhl,still alive despite docs prediction healthier now than ever…used it to learn
@@Wannabe1979 I had a boyfriend who followed that method - he swore by it. Honestly, I tried! Maybe it’s something about being from Alaska, but I can only do what we referred to as the “polar bear plunge” if there’s a sauna nearby. In that case, oh yeahhhhhhhh!! Nothing better.
@@Wannabe1979 I need to try this. Thanks for sharing.
"The problem is not a problem, the problem is your attitude about the problem" - Jack Sparrow
So an abused or neglected child does not have a 'problem'? Its just their 'attitude'?
❤
I never knew there was a word for it. I had an extremely challenging childhood, my father suicided, my mother was diagnosed as a psychopath, I was deemed an abused and neglected child. I see this as the building blocks for my vocation. After therapy I became an mental health worker but not a clinician, I used peoples gifts, talents and walked beside them. My daughter died at 27 of ovarian cancer and suddenly I found people attracted to me who were struggling with grief. I am retired now, medically after a fall but I discovered my late daughters art supplies and now I am an artist. So this is called Amor Fati. Thank you
♥️🙏
Karen - I just read your post. You spoke beautifully of your life challenges. I have had a similar journey. Also, my only daughter died at 34 of an od someone gave her on purpose. I am naturally creative & have spent the last 2 1/2 yrs keeping busy renovating 2 houses. Currently am reading the books of the stoics which are helping to keep me sane. Good luck on your continued journey.
🙏
This comment is bullshit
❤❤❤
I don't know where to start but I can say I was terribly depressed 2-3 years ago. I was overweight and hopeless, I was constantly angry. I saw your posts one day and I was curious about what you had to say. Thanks to great Stoics from the past and your efforts, I'm getting better at discipline and controlling my emotions. I'm an amateur powerlifting athlete now and I remember what Marcus Aurelius said about waking up in the morning everyday. Thank you Ryan!
Congratulations👍👍👍
I am struggling to hold on and every day gets harder.i don't think I'm going to make it.
@@stanleyhape8427 I pray you are well ❤️🙏❤️
@@stanleyhape8427 I hope get better
You will make it always remember you have the whole universe with you to help you...
@@stanleyhape8427 you are gonna make it!
"Once my house burned down, I see the moon more clearly" Love your channel. The Stoics were brilliant minds.
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Opportunity is a scarce commodity. I will partake in this; there’s no limit to what you can achieve in life (including success) if you put your mind to it. Luckily I stumble into this.
As soon as I learned about amor fati, I got it tattooed on my chest. Constant reminder to accept whatever life throws at you
I got it tattooed on my wrist. Love your work brother!
I cannot think of a better example of this than columnist/commentator Charles Krauthammer, who was a tall, athletic, great looking college kid planning on going to medical school when he dove into a pool, broke his neck and ended up paralyzed from the chest down. He so accepted what had happened to him that mental health counselors told him he was "in denial," but he created a life that was on every level hugely successful. What an inspiration.
My dad used to always say, "Things that you can't change are unchangeable" I always though it was a weird saying, but it does make sense.
I found you at the right time.
Not had it easy as a single oarent escaping DV, homeless, became disabled after an accident, met a great man..who has cancer and lost mum last month.
But....I still have gratitude. Everyone is going through some sort of struggle. Just be kind.
The acceptance of life circumstances I learned from my grandparents-hard life, wars (ww1 and ww2 ) hunger and they were still content .calm .disciplined with common sense and knowledge to resolve everyday hardships.Never ever heard from them negative word about Life ...when you are in hell keep walking.
"What you throw in front of a fire is fuel for the fire." - My favorite phrase from this video.
Take aways:
-Acceptance of the things that happen to us is the first step in being able to respond to them, to turn them into something.
-Some things are out of our control, we can't change them, no matter of whining is going to affect them. But we can control how we respond.
-Enjoy the absurdity of what happens, it prevents you to getting bored.
-Welcome things the way they happen. Accept things and get to work using it.
-Amor Fati = Love of faith = Loving everything that happens to you, not fighting against it, and finding the good in it.
-You've been through things like this before. It prevents you to getting bored.
-Amor Fati is not natural to us. In case of adversity, you will first ask yourself "Why me?". But that is life, that is what it is. To be angry about that means to not love life itself.
But still fighting tooth and nail to tear free from destiny
Amor fati = love of fate*
Going through a rough time now...this video really gave me a new perspective on life's challenges.
Me 2 🙏⚘️
We got you. I'm wishing you (both) strength and peace. 💟
"What doesn't kill us ...makes us stronger. "
As I grew older I became aware that no matter the story there was someone else that had an even worse story. Hearing stories of people with these “worse stories” who overcame and even excelled helps me to realize I too can overcome. I think a lot of what keeps certain people down is because their focus is inward. Accepting what has happened and deciding it’s not enough to keep you down is the beginning of a new chapter in life. I like to think of acceptance in the context of playing cards. Sometimes you are dealt a bad hand, no one immediately quits the game. Instead we accept the cards and do our best to win that hand. We need to do the same with life events.
Ive been having a seriously rough night and past few months but this has honestly given me a bit of solace, hope and faith. Thank you Ryan, i need to relisten to your books again..
Making the most of an unfortunate situation and *loving* an unfortunate situation are two different things. And I think it’s ok not to “love” adversity, as long as you can accept it and deal with it.
yes
This guy is talented as hell, an indepth knowledge of this ancient philosophy with a modern outlook , well done Sir
I like the idea that you don’t have to necessarily love the failure ,just accepting it it’s enough
So powerful
Not all these extra positive stuff as “Oh I love my disease…”
I think the most difficult aspects of life is to accept the bad consequences of our bad decisions. Obviously, one has no accept those situations that we cannot control; but to get over and accept the losses due to bad decisions is not as easy. However, the survival of the fittest in nature teaches that one has to be strong and move on with the living.
Very important observation. If we don’t accept the consequences of our own bad decisions, we blame others which is major denial that will hold you back from success. My son is living that life and continues to fail.
@@cynthiacole6140 I pray your son is set free from this & grows out of it with a learning experience to freedom. Book of Proverbs & Psalms may help him navigate out of it
"Survival of the fittest" is an often misused and misunderstood phrase. "Fit" in nature doesn't mean the strongest survive. It means an individual has successfully procreated and produced viable offspring. E.g. a guy with a flabby dad bod who has a brood of healthy kids is more "fit" than a bodybuilder who has no children, because the bodybuilder is not propagating the species.
@@shimmeringchimps3842 🤣🤣🤣🤣 obviously you don't understand its meaning. The survival of the fittest or strongest doesn't mean necessarily "physical strength or physical fitness " but rather having the strongest abilities to adapt, overcome, and survive.
@@CARACAS1 my professor in Ireland would often say, in rather pompous tone, that adaptability is the sine qua non existence ☘🇮🇪☘
I’m in the middle of losing the love of my life. This video showed up at the strangest and best time.
I’m an avid reader of Epictetus and fell in love with stoicism months ago. Amor Fati is a great discovery that I will now be learning about in order to get through the hardest time of my life. Thank you Ryan, thank you
Your videos get me through the day. I am trying to conquer some bad behaviors, and change is sometimes hard. My inner voice wants to cave to defeat but then I watch a video and I can usually shed more light on the subject. Ultimately watching your videos has been very helpful for me.
Everything happens for a reason. I came across this today because I needed to hear it. 2 weeks ago I literally had a serious wake up call...an TIA stroke in the middle of the night. At the end of the interview the gentlemen describes his stroke and how he has dealt with it. Thank you for having Impact Ryan. Keep on keeping on...
Not everything happens for a reason. That's a myth. That is justification thinking. Things happen. Period. It's how you respond to them that matters. It's all that matters.
This guy pretty much saved my life. Many thanks
“Amor Fati”, the Love of Fate, is the internal practice of accepting the situation you find yourself in. You then Cowboy Up, and Soldier On.
I’ve just recently began my journey on the Stoics and what I’ve learned so far was already being implemented in my life to a degree. Im grateful to have found this school of thought, I’ve had a rough year or two, and I never knew I was (in some form) embracing Amor Fati. Thank you for the content, I’ll be coming back at-least once a week. ❤
Only two things you control, your attitude and your effort.
The comments are as interesting as the video! Thank you for sharing from Germany from a natural stoic, who wouldn’t have survived without this 'talents'. Love your books, too! Love, Monika❣
Thank you and all Stoics, past and present. So so grateful!
I am forever a work in progress however I have come to the overall knowledge that I am literally here to experience and that's all. Good, bad, indifferent, it is all about the experiences we have and that's the beautiful simple truth of this existence. We only take knowledge with us when we die. Nothing else. Experience breeds knowledge and growth. Free will comes in with the choice of whether we grow above or grow backwards. Either way it is growth.
The Stoic ideas have helped me so much in my life. I realized that sometimes, the thing I dreaded the most turned out to be great experiences. So I realized there is no poit to dreading anything.
Ancient wise words and no-one ever taught me this when I was younger. But I have these words now to implement on myself and to pass on to my family and friends. Thank you.
This applies to an individual's life and it applies to humanity as a collective. We will need to practice "amor fati" in terms of humanity's fate in the next few years in order to make sense of what is coming.
Having two little girls in two years who both have a chromosome triplication has turned everything I used to believe on it’s head. I literally lost my belief in good. Absurdity is right!! I can’t change what happened, but I need to work my entire life to accept it. Tough stuff that I know will take the rest of my life to work on.
Yikes. You have a long hard road. 😢
@@77Tadams and lonely. Thanks for taking the time to respond. I’ve noticed in myself and other special needs mamas ( with profoundly disabled kids) that we often feel so invisible, so “other.”
@@CAGChannel1 so sorry. I don’t have kids. Sometimes that is lonely too. Let me tell you a secret though. People in general are lonely. This life can be hard to manage. I had a therapist tell me that most people are unhappy. It can be rather a dense world. Hang in there.
This video came at right time when I was about to look up how we endure adversity. Recently, I was shocked by some news that will be affecting me for this entire year, and I feel anxious on a daily basis about whether I'm going to be able to endure it or not. Thank you for the great video, Ryan! ❤️
You can not change what happened "yesterday" you can only learn from it ,and make changes moving forward.❤
Robert Greene is such an amazing person. So humble and intelligent🙏🙏🙏
Amor Fati: Good reminder.
It seems we create idealistis but unachievable fantasies then cloak things in compassion.
Then we wonder why we fail.
Or refuse to acceptable failure, then move on to success.
Stoicism and Bhagwad Gita show us the way of Life and how to live it.
Thankyou for sharing this message 🙏
Just got diagnosed with crones disease today, needed this. Thank you. Also bought the Gregory Hayes version of meditations because of you, that’s been amazing as well.
Be amazing mate, be you now. Nicko nz.
Quit grains ,seed oils
This video shifted how I view myself to a more positive place. I was called "jaded" once by someone close to me and I accepted that description without question. However, I couldn't figure out why I was so much more happy, why I was so much more optimistic than the stereotype of a jaded person. This video answered that question for me. I am just a person who naturally practices the concept of "amor fati" in my daily life without ever knowing this attitude had a name given to it. It isn't that I'm jaded, that nothing is new to me because I've seen it before. It is because I have seen situations before that I can appreciate something new every time. Tough situations are a beautiful challenge to practice gratitude, to practice joy, to CHOOSE gratitude and joy instead of resentment.
Some tragedies should never come into existence, like abuse and parental neglect, but how each person chooses to come out of those horrendous situations is where beauty, courage, and strength can blossom or where death will fester. This is an important concept and I thank you for sharing it.
Going through depression and loneliness, thank you for this video! I also just started reading The Daily Stoic and it's insights already started helping me shift my mindset. Thank you for bringing Stoicism into my life. I will try practicing amor fati today and hopefully throughout my life!
I like what came out of your conversation with Robert... Instead of "Amor Fati", it should be more like
"Amor Vitae, Acceptatio Fati"
Truly food for healthier thought development. Thank you Sir. 😮
I grew up in an abusive father and mother. Joined the Airforce as a medic. Dealt with trauma patients and suicidal teammates! I had PTSD suffered panic and anxiety but found your book heard the amorefati and faith and playing the hand you were dealt with. It made me have a peace of mind and meditation and living my life like the stoics! Thank you Ryan!!
I wonder what a great friend would Ryan be, to have a beer listening Iron Maiden and chat about the stoics and life from time to time...
I went through a nasty divorce and just felt so horrible at the time, now I realise it was just a lesson I badly needed.
This needs to be taught in schools.
Ryan, thank you so much for sharing your knowledge of Stoicism. It has helped me pull through a lot of turmoil and trauma I recently experienced. It's been a challenge but I am grateful for for my life and what the future holds. ✌️❤😊🙏
My vintage Jaguar Mark 4 caught fire in the middle of Stanly Park in Vancouver.
After several futile attempts to extinguish the fire, I stood back and watched it burn with a smile.
Strangers approached me asking why I was smiling. I answered that I was happy to know
I was the last person to drive that beautiful car.
Thank you Ryan, for real, your voice even in small clips gets me through the day.
Seneca: "Life is like a play: it's not the length, but the excellence of the acting that matters."
Thank you Ryan. My mom started sending me your videos, they’re really helping me through a tough time. Keep it up 👍
The problem with accepting fate is that you create your own fate with your own beliefs. Change your beliefs and you change your fate.
Recently learned that I’d been scammed out of my life savings by a supposed friend of my dad after my dad suddenly died last year. I needed to learn about this, to put it mildly.
Since being scammed, it’s as if the universe has been repeatedly trying to screw with me in ways I couldn’t even fathom through the most ludicrous scenarios.
Strangely enough I realised through watching this that being Stoic isn’t always about being strong mentally. It’s also about going through the negative emotions and analysing them to improve you as a person.
I once read something that sound like this "The happiest life if one where even if you have to live it over and over again, you would not change a thing."
It was much later when I realized there is no such life, no matter how luxurious or pleasurable, it will become an endless nightmare soon enough. It it only through sheer strength of mind and will that you can accept any life given to you and still achieve happiness.
I let myself feel it. Then I metabolize it. Then I "brightside" it.
Happiness doesn’t depend on outside circumstances and one’s own personal relationships or your posessions. Happiness is inside your mind its in your state of mind so in order you can achieve it one must immerse himself n focus on the today and now our duties in our daily life accept it Amor Fati Love your fate and them have Compassion to your heart and Contentment in our Mind! Gautama Buddha
Once again, this is right on time!
Thank you so much.
ACCEPTING IS THE ONLY WAY TO GET MY PEACE BACK.
I don’t have to like it, just accept it.
Ryan beautiful, staying in the moment , grateful I found your space. So thank you for all you put out to the world . Keep providing people with hope and acceptance .
in everyday language...it is what it is...
You asked in the video-'i hope you liked this video'
I certainly did. I loved it and I'm sure many others did too. Amazing content.
I cried. Difficult year. Blessed everyday. Great video
❤❤❤❤❤❤ hope you’re well
No phrase or concept has changed my life more than Amor Fati.
I had heard the phrase Memento Mori a lot. It seemed to be the main stoic mantra, and Amor Fati seemed like more of a back burner phrase-at least that was the impression that I got, anyway.
But because I have a neurotic personality, Amor Fati resonated with me A LOT more once I fully understood its meaning.
This simple phrase and concept helped me to lose 60 pounds. It helped me advance my career and move me closer to starting my own business. It gave me confidence to put myself out there and build connections.
It is the most powerful concept I’ve ever been exposed to.
If I were to ever tattoo a phrase on my body so that I would remember to always live by it, it would be Amor Fati.
Love the flowers with the marble. Wonderful
Acceptance is the key to serenity
A very wise man once told me that discontent was the primary motivator for change. So I suppose it's how you look at it. Yes, if I were born a certain height, I would accept that and not complain about it. However, if my boss beat me every time I entered the office, I wouldn't accept that and I'd be looking to change my circumstances. Excellent video with very good lessons.
I love life but the anger I feel about the abuse of trust and cruelty that nearly killed me and left me almost completely bereft is the only reason I am energised to fight to save other potential victims from a similar fate, even though I have little chance of success. Knowing that anyone else ever suffered so needlessly while the transgressor enjoys continued exalted status in the community seems beyond the stoicism that I will need to get through the battles ahead, or swallow the injustice if, or when, I fail.
An in depth explanation of the expression "it is what it is".... love it!
4:05 with enough time and distance
That's the key...
Man I found Ryan and stoicism 2 years ago and somehow I keep learning after I thought I knew everything. Thank you.
Somewhere I read along the lines of-- 90% of life is how we react to the 10% we can't control
It’s true. I am who I am today because of my life experiences, both good and bad. Acquiescence helps soften the bad at the least, but in any case I’ve grown from it, so it was good. Very helpful.
And yeah… I don’t love my stroke either!
I like to thank God for my aches and pains and everything that goes wrong in life. This, Amor Fati, sounds like the same idea. Interesting!
No place I'd rather be than right here right now because of the great people I now know because of it.
Grow from where you are planted🌻
Also had a left sided stroke too.
I never lost the resolve to learn and appreciate it’s lessons.
Remember what Heraclitus said, "The only constant in life is change." Once you master this, you can let go of your need to control things and people you can't and you'll find a burden lifted from your heart. It took me years to really get this but it can be done.
Adversity and injustice are not the same thing. Injustice is a brutally vicious beast that only grows more teeth and becomes dangerous the more it is ignored. Turning the other cheek emboldens its violence and it is lethal. Adversity is easier to disempower with a mind shift. Injustice can be part of one's adversity, but because injustice is 100% outside of a victim's control, and because it feasts on apathy, inaction and passivity on account of those who are not its particular target, defeating it requires more. I would love to hear you unpack how we can apply these wonderful perspectives and skills you share when it comes to injustice. As we've seen on our own soil inaction and passivity doesn't make it go away. It allows it to fester until it threatens to burn the whole country down. If you have time, I'd love to see a video covering this in depth please.
I've read the stoics. Thought they were good. But you put it into words that are amazing. Thank you.
Dangerous mindset in todays social climate. Accepting reality the way it is
🛋🦍
I am so thankful to have stumbled on your content.
Yes! Amor Fati is the best! Love your fate! Also “Que Cera Cera” what will be will be!
Thank you for sharing this helpful philosophy. I am learning to accept the sudden loss of my brother.
Gonna roll up an amor fati right now. 😎
Thank you for sharing. You are an inspiration, love your videos. My life is so much brighter with this mindset taught. Thanks
I have to watch this video time and time again to remind myself of Amor Fati !
Beautiful message - beautiful way to live! Thank your so much for sharing this beneficial approach to life!! Amor Fati!!
A life without challenges is a life without growth.
You can’t change what happens but you do control your attitude. Now I go for a daily early morning bike ride. It’s a half hour around a sweet golf course surrounded by hills. If I select the correct gear at the right moment then I can avoid the chain coming off.
If not then “amor fati” (I’m even saying it to myself now)!
Robert Green is a gem
Your videos always come at the perfect time, even though I saw this video beofre... It was a great reminder in this moment. 🙏
Ultimately it doesn't really matter how you feel about what has happened but what does matter is what you do next. Thinking and feeling are normal things to reflect on the meaning of things and what it is important to you. A vision, a mission, project, tasks and immediate needs require actions. Having a plan, strategies, a calendar and a schedule will give you the framework for having structure in your life. By using a calendar and working a schedule you will develop a personal planning style and routine/system. First see the value on the idea of a planner and calendar to buy into trying it. Second, you have to use the calendar and planner for about 2 weeks to develop trust and become dependent on them as a tool and resource. It won't be comfortable or part of your daily routine until you implement using it and rely on it as the new and official way of managing your life and planning your goals. As things change, and predictions fail, your plan will change so then you can't always be rigid following a plan. Your planning style will need to be flexible and have wiggle room for adjusting. Don't over fill it unrealistically. Over filling the time slots can be stressful. Good luck
I like to tell myself "The Universe is always correct" no matter what I think, what happened is what fate/God/Universe has decided, and it is smarter and has more information than me.
Now that's what I call a POWERFUL MESSAGE thank you so much!
This was perfect. Thank you.