Thank you for addressing mens fears when it comes to marriage, and the monetary consequences of that marriage failing. There is no consideration for what was done or what was sacrificed during that marriage to gain those assets. The best part of my day was seeing my wife and daughter when I got home from work, now 50% of the time I come home to an empty house and warm dinner up in a microwave. That’s a hard transition when you thought everything was okay prior to all of this.
men dont feel this way.. they think that way.. ^^ i know you maybe say oohh that is the same. no its not .. the moment if you understand this fully you understand men.
@@soydansogukcesme470 intuition and feelings are often stronger and more wise than purely detached rationalisations... You do not understand yourself, mearly parroting manism content, like a utter donkey. Breehhhh breehhh
Lol l by coincidence, I had commented back to you about men, looking for loyalty reassurance and here we have Alex expressing exactly what my worries would be that said I am one of Alex‘s audience members, but that fear of being left of investing so much only to see it fall apart is real Also the inevitable truth that you were not enough to keep her that you didn’t meet her standards, not some mutual agnostic problem, but very specifically that you as a person were lacking
I’m not religious Alexander, but you have more of what I understand to be godliness in you, than anyone I’ve seen The effort that you must have put in to acquire your insight, is astounding to me. I am 65 and consider myself a caring father I, hope you are having a cultural affect on what I see is a revolution of narcissism and jealousy, for anyone who dare have more. Keep up your wonderful work, I am grateful for your sacrifice, it’s for the good of all humanity female and male, and is most importantly good for our children who give us so much joy. Thank you for being.
Todd touched on a subject that needs more spotlight. Being invisible to women. Suffering for human connection, and lashing out with violence when you feel the world has turned its back on you.
The rise if lonely men, he has mentioned and emily too how its disingenuous to put the entire blame at the feet of men, and to say men have to be better
But I still stress for the guys that feel invisible to women start working out with weights every day! Start eating better as well and these two things alone will have you walking with more confidence - more confidence means women will notice you ..imo you can’t expect women to notice you if you rarely go outside and act really shy or passive
You also have to add in people who are neuroDivergent And who don't really understand social cues a lot and who then in some ways have anxiety because of that and really don't want to have anything to do socially and then end up just spending a lot of time alone
You are basically talking about autism or Asperger’s correct? I’ve heard this talked about on Chris williamsons podcast but it’s hard for them to recommend solutions when they aren’t autistic .. I think only a mental Health expert could help these types of guys
@@melisailayza9044 🤣 the original comment didn’t age well at all then. 🫣 Well actually the comment didn’t say that what you hear makes any sense…. That’s actually a pity then! It’s always a pity when there is effort put into something that doesn’t bare fruit But I think it is a great start to be listening at all!!💪👍 If you are open to what is being said, and not defensive about it, that that information has a chance to reach you,, to honestly think about it and see if you can accept or identify with it or if it’s actually nonsense. that is great too👍 ✌️your cander is much appreciated👍 For my part, I hope you keep listening I try todo the same! Its why i subbed to mathew hussey
Women may benefit from not engaging with the struggle men are going through, but given the right environment I don’t think they’re as unwilling and oppose to hearing men’s issues as Alex says. I think they’re just so surprised and ignorant of it that their first response is to call BS. They’ve never been challenged on it and most people aren’t very self aware to begin with, so many people aren’t willing to grapple with it.
I think older women might understand that visibility issue when she hits that wall, where from one day to the next she is no longer that hot 25-year-old turning all the heads in the room, but she is that 45-year-old which is completely ignored And the pain associated with that when that moment hits is real
A woman that lives a few houses down from me is just realizing this. She was attractive when younger and now she’s 33 and has gained weight and isn’t getting noticed as much. She is single and I can tell she is freaking out a bit yet she doesn’t know what to do .
@@brianmeen2158 yeah .. its not fun, in that my human compassion to some serious #firstworldproblems, alas alot guys dont know ANY other reality, so you know theres that too. But i can imagine it being jarring and scary. I have compassion for that regardless of the reason
That is because men have showed this vulnerability to women before and the results were ugly.. one of two two things happen when the man opens up emotionally 1-the woman really doesn’t pay attention 2-the woman uses this info as ammunition in future arguments Seriously, most guys have been through this. It is often counter productive to open up emotionally to women you are sexually attracted to. So we don’t
It is what is and work with the cards handed to you. I always hear things can be better but how about working with it rather than pretending things should be like that.
LMAO! Tell this to the feminists, to Black Lives Matter, La Raze, The Gay Agenda etc! All the recent strides made by these groups were made because they WOULD NOT work with whatwas handed to them, they would NOT play nice and the sand box! They all had tantrums, and continue to have tantrums periodically and they are given their way! Men should now make society EXTREMELY uncomfortable until they kow tow to our basic demands, since they have shown us the blu print that will work! Am I right?
Allexander’s channel is such such a treasure, trove of relevant information that it is impossible to with any degree of competency even attempt to answer that in one question That said there is only one piece of advice that I think encompasses so so much, and that is to approach the situation and the person as if they are not special in anyway By feeling that truly you are not going to place a lot of pressure on the interaction going well you are going to be unabashedly and confidently yourself you’re not going to be needy or clingy But I understand there is an oxymoron in that. If you really don’t care about the person, why would you approach them to which I answer one thing that Alex recently said which really sucks with me is that of course, every girl knows that guys approach them because they’re interested it would be a lie to say otherwise, but to hope things go well, but not really place any large amount of value on that is a good starting point
Alex, quite rightly, speaks to a very uncomfortable and confronting truth that a lot of ass men in a way look for that caring and compassion we should have gotten or seek from our mothers and the idea of accepting that one is in a way. A mamas boy is so degrading and confronting that it took me quite a long time to be able to square the thought of acting in a way that is seeking motherly approval, and I still don’t like the idea. The reaction to being told something like I’m not, your mother is visceral and immediate. Absolutely, it’s more complex than simply men don’t deserve any compassion because a man takes care of others and doesn’t get taken care of, but it often feels that way that any desire you have for compassion or teamwork, is just thrown down the toilet under the Monika of you want to be mothered The defence of reaction is real
Really need to push back on the idea of childless relationships being failures and major deviations, not everyone is suited or has desire for parenthood. Rearing children is not the the ultimate goal to have a fulfilling life. As many miserable parents will tell you, they admit they wished they hadn’t.
Emily, with all the manosphere red pill stuff out there, what are your thoughts around all the judgements towards single moms in the dating market? And what has been your experiences? I feel like this doesn't get addressed enough. Some of these content creators just say whatever they want, but we rarely if at all hear from single moms that are actually responsible versus the typical ones that go on shows like fresh and fit.
I understand that biology says we should reproduce, but I don't understand how anyone can, in good conscience, bring another living being into our current world without being selfish. If the internet has taught us anything, it's that some folks should have pulled or got swallowed because some bloodlines were not meant to continue, and if someone is aware enough to know theirs, shouldn't I say good for them. Plus, I find it interesting that during this whole discussion with kids, adoption wasn't mentioned unless I missed it.
But we are safer now than we have ever been in history. Life expectancy is longer as well. I think some of you watch too much doom propaganda and black pill content
To this story my ex left me for her boss was managing to strip club that she was working at which I advised against her working at and we were young this was about 2014 I caught her cheating on me and March and it was happening since November turned out she was three months and knocked up with his kid and didn't think I would find out she was planning all along to run off with him which eventually happen and took my kid. She also did adult videos behind my back which I found on the internet which are still there and she basically told me after 5 years I've asking she said I didn't leave you because you were not a good husband or a good father you were it's just that this guy made more money than you and that's what I wanted. It's so f***** up and then she tried to have my daughter call me other dad and the other guy dad and I got a different judge in a different state that they wound up moving to and the new judge who was a younger lady judge believes me while.I have dual custody I still pay child support. Only because my daughter lives six months out of the year with her mom but me and my daughter are very close we're besties we talk everyday we see each other often sometimes on a weekend I'll just drive the whole six hours there and back in one day just to see her even though it's not my visitation time I get her to the summer spring break and rotating holidays but we speak every day on video chat my daughter is definitely a daddy's girl and definitely looks up to me. The sad thing is her mom admitted to her why she is where she is at cetera and my daughter is angry at her for it because she broke up a perfectly good family because of financial status which was bs. Now her mom got big and fat as a second son with the guy and she doesn't even work and he still manages to gentlemen's clubs. And she has broken all of the custody rules as far as bringing my daughter to me being a co-parent etc she's been breaking them for over 5-years my daughter was taken when she was too and she's 11 now I just haven't gone back to court to fight it because of the industry that I work in it would be difficult for me to be a single parent at the moment. Because of the demands an hour's my job requires. But I also think that yes DNA should happen at birth DNA testing and also if the woman gets child support she needs to prove on every receipt every month what she spends the money on to prove that she spending the money on that child and not herself or other people
I don’t see how telling men to self improve is going to solve any of this tho. You can’t fight Pareto’s Principle. I think Hypergamy is normal and it worked in Hunter gatherer tribes. Some men just gonna perish. But once we have farming and cities and the resource aspect of raising children becomes more important than genes. Marriage emerged and that became dominant. What have changed since feminism and technology? Is resource no longer important for raising children? Or are we just in a short but abrupt era of change, where only few will adapt and reproduce (men and women in this case). And those that do find a way to adapt will resume on the path of population growth?
Self improvement for men will improve many areas of his life. Eating better, getting outside and in the sun and working out more will benefit all men. Don’t improve yourself just for women - do it for yourself . Besides, what do you have to lose?
Thank you for addressing mens fears when it comes to marriage, and the monetary consequences of that marriage failing. There is no consideration for what was done or what was sacrificed during that marriage to gain those assets. The best part of my day was seeing my wife and daughter when I got home from work, now 50% of the time I come home to an empty house and warm dinner up in a microwave. That’s a hard transition when you thought everything was okay prior to all of this.
Yeah man. I’m not trusting a woman ever again.
Your podcast is very eye opening. I would have never known what males biggest fears in relationships are . I think it's valid for men to feel this way
men dont feel this way.. they think that way.. ^^
i know you maybe say oohh that is the same. no its not .. the moment if you understand this fully you understand men.
@@soydansogukcesme470 semantics
@@sammcconkey8768 wtf .. feeling and thinking are 2 differend meanings.. there is no semantics between those words
@@soydansogukcesme470 intuition and feelings are often stronger and more wise than purely detached rationalisations... You do not understand yourself, mearly parroting manism content, like a utter donkey. Breehhhh breehhh
Lol l by coincidence, I had commented back to you about men, looking for loyalty reassurance and here we have Alex expressing exactly what my worries would be that said I am one of Alex‘s audience members, but that fear of being left of investing so much only to see it fall apart is real
Also the inevitable truth that you were not enough to keep her that you didn’t meet her standards, not some mutual agnostic problem, but very specifically that you as a person were lacking
I’m not religious Alexander, but you have more of what I understand to be godliness in you, than anyone I’ve seen
The effort that you must have put in to acquire your insight, is astounding to me.
I am 65 and consider myself a caring father I, hope you are having a cultural affect on what I see is a revolution of narcissism and jealousy, for anyone who dare have more.
Keep up your wonderful work, I am grateful for your sacrifice, it’s for the good of all humanity female and male, and is most importantly good for our children who give us so much joy.
Thank you for being.
He said it best with the current divorce laws against men. It’s like a “human rights violation.”
Todd touched on a subject that needs more spotlight. Being invisible to women. Suffering for human connection, and lashing out with violence when you feel the world has turned its back on you.
The rise if lonely men, he has mentioned and emily too how its disingenuous to put the entire blame at the feet of men, and to say men have to be better
But I still stress for the guys that feel invisible to women start working out with weights every day! Start eating better as well and these two things alone will have you walking with more confidence - more confidence means women will notice you ..imo you can’t expect women to notice you if you rarely go outside and act really shy or passive
@@brianmeen2158 except the über eats and pizza delivery 😝 jk jk
You also have to add in people who are neuroDivergent And who don't really understand social cues a lot and who then in some ways have anxiety because of that and really don't want to have anything to do socially and then end up just spending a lot of time alone
Yup. Never heard someone talk about this
You are basically talking about autism or Asperger’s correct? I’ve heard this talked about on Chris williamsons podcast but it’s hard for them to recommend solutions when they aren’t autistic .. I think only a mental
Health expert could help these types of guys
This is without a doubt the most "there is no hope just quit" podcast i have ever listened to jesus christ.
It’s ovER
Like to hear about mens opinions on relationships and hearing about their fears.👍🏼
What are those fears? Its been a month, do you still know?
@@Pssst.ByTheWay Honestly, I’m pretty much more clueless than I’ve ever been.
@@melisailayza9044 🤣 the original comment didn’t age well at all then. 🫣
Well actually the comment didn’t say that what you hear makes any sense….
That’s actually a pity then! It’s always a pity when there is effort put into something that doesn’t bare fruit
But I think it is a great start to be listening at all!!💪👍
If you are open to what is being said, and not defensive about it, that that information has a chance to reach you,, to honestly think about it and see if you can accept or identify with it or if it’s actually nonsense. that is great too👍
✌️your cander is much appreciated👍
For my part, I hope you keep listening
I try todo the same! Its why i subbed to mathew hussey
i really REALLY loved this episode, it felt like real people having a loving and sane conversation filled with love.
Please do this again
👌🏼Spot on. The core root of the issues in modern dating is that women simply do not care what men want.
I definitely agree that children need both their mother and father.
Women may benefit from not engaging with the struggle men are going through, but given the right environment I don’t think they’re as unwilling and oppose to hearing men’s issues as Alex says.
I think they’re just so surprised and ignorant of it that their first response is to call BS. They’ve never been challenged on it and most people aren’t very self aware to begin with, so many people aren’t willing to grapple with it.
I think older women might understand that visibility issue when she hits that wall, where from one day to the next she is no longer that hot 25-year-old turning all the heads in the room, but she is that 45-year-old which is completely ignored
And the pain associated with that when that moment hits is real
A woman that lives a few houses down from me is just realizing this. She was attractive when younger and now she’s 33 and has gained weight and isn’t getting noticed as much. She is single and I can tell she is freaking out a bit yet she doesn’t know what to do .
@@brianmeen2158 yeah .. its not fun, in that my human compassion to some serious #firstworldproblems,
alas alot guys dont know ANY other reality, so you know theres that too.
But i can imagine it being jarring and scary. I have compassion for that regardless of the reason
Fat, old, and unattractive women know what it’s like to be invisible
I really like Alexander Grace ive been a patreon supporter of his for years. He has extreme integrity
I completely agree with Emily that men have become to scared to show vulnerability and actually let their guard down.
That is because men have showed this vulnerability to women before and the results were ugly.. one of two two things happen when the man opens up emotionally
1-the woman really doesn’t pay attention
2-the woman uses this info as ammunition in future arguments
Seriously, most guys have been through this. It is often counter productive to open up emotionally to women you are sexually attracted to. So we don’t
This was an excellent podcast
It is what is and work with the cards handed to you. I always hear things can be better but how about working with it rather than pretending things should be like that.
LMAO! Tell this to the feminists, to Black Lives Matter, La Raze, The Gay Agenda etc! All the recent strides made by these groups were made because they WOULD NOT work with whatwas handed to them, they would NOT play nice and the sand box! They all had tantrums, and continue to have tantrums periodically and they are given their way! Men should now make society EXTREMELY uncomfortable until they kow tow to our basic demands, since they have shown us the blu print that will work! Am I right?
Allexander’s channel is such such a treasure, trove of relevant information that it is impossible to with any degree of competency even attempt to answer that in one question
That said there is only one piece of advice that I think encompasses so so much, and that is to approach the situation and the person as if they are not special in anyway
By feeling that truly you are not going to place a lot of pressure on the interaction going well you are going to be unabashedly and confidently yourself you’re not going to be needy or clingy
But I understand there is an oxymoron in that. If you really don’t care about the person, why would you approach them to which I answer one thing that Alex recently said which really sucks with me is that of course, every girl knows that guys approach them because they’re interested it would be a lie to say otherwise, but to hope things go well, but not really place any large amount of value on that is a good starting point
Alex, quite rightly, speaks to a very uncomfortable and confronting truth that a lot of ass men in a way look for that caring and compassion we should have gotten or seek from our mothers and the idea of accepting that one is in a way. A mamas boy is so degrading and confronting that it took me quite a long time to be able to square the thought of acting in a way that is seeking motherly approval, and I still don’t like the idea.
The reaction to being told something like I’m not, your mother is visceral and immediate.
Absolutely, it’s more complex than simply men don’t deserve any compassion because a man takes care of others and doesn’t get taken care of, but it often feels that way that any desire you have for compassion or teamwork, is just thrown down the toilet under the Monika of you want to be mothered
The defence of reaction is real
Really need to push back on the idea of childless relationships being failures and major deviations, not everyone is suited or has desire for parenthood. Rearing children is not the the ultimate goal to have a fulfilling life. As many miserable parents will tell you, they admit they wished they hadn’t.
Todd is on alexs’ patreon… im going to be paying attention for Mr Ts
Emily, with all the manosphere red pill stuff out there, what are your thoughts around all the judgements towards single moms in the dating market? And what has been your experiences? I feel like this doesn't get addressed enough. Some of these content creators just say whatever they want, but we rarely if at all hear from single moms that are actually responsible versus the typical ones that go on shows like fresh and fit.
They're overly cosseted like all women today and not held to account.
I understand that biology says we should reproduce, but I don't understand how anyone can, in good conscience, bring another living being into our current world without being selfish. If the internet has taught us anything, it's that some folks should have pulled or got swallowed because some bloodlines were not meant to continue, and if someone is aware enough to know theirs, shouldn't I say good for them. Plus, I find it interesting that during this whole discussion with kids, adoption wasn't mentioned unless I missed it.
But we are safer now than we have ever been in history. Life expectancy is longer as well. I think some of you watch too much doom propaganda and black pill content
@@brianmeen2158 Try saying that to a Palestinian.
To this story my ex left me for her boss was managing to strip club that she was working at which I advised against her working at and we were young this was about 2014 I caught her cheating on me and March and it was happening since November turned out she was three months and knocked up with his kid and didn't think I would find out she was planning all along to run off with him which eventually happen and took my kid. She also did adult videos behind my back which I found on the internet which are still there and she basically told me after 5 years I've asking she said I didn't leave you because you were not a good husband or a good father you were it's just that this guy made more money than you and that's what I wanted. It's so f***** up and then she tried to have my daughter call me other dad and the other guy dad and I got a different judge in a different state that they wound up moving to and the new judge who was a younger lady judge believes me while.I have dual custody I still pay child support. Only because my daughter lives six months out of the year with her mom but me and my daughter are very close we're besties we talk everyday we see each other often sometimes on a weekend I'll just drive the whole six hours there and back in one day just to see her even though it's not my visitation time I get her to the summer spring break and rotating holidays but we speak every day on video chat my daughter is definitely a daddy's girl and definitely looks up to me. The sad thing is her mom admitted to her why she is where she is at cetera and my daughter is angry at her for it because she broke up a perfectly good family because of financial status which was bs. Now her mom got big and fat as a second son with the guy and she doesn't even work and he still manages to gentlemen's clubs. And she has broken all of the custody rules as far as bringing my daughter to me being a co-parent etc she's been breaking them for over 5-years my daughter was taken when she was too and she's 11 now I just haven't gone back to court to fight it because of the industry that I work in it would be difficult for me to be a single parent at the moment. Because of the demands an hour's my job requires. But I also think that yes DNA should happen at birth DNA testing and also if the woman gets child support she needs to prove on every receipt every month what she spends the money on to prove that she spending the money on that child and not herself or other people
39:00
I don’t see how telling men to self improve is going to solve any of this tho. You can’t fight Pareto’s Principle. I think Hypergamy is normal and it worked in Hunter gatherer tribes. Some men just gonna perish. But once we have farming and cities and the resource aspect of raising children becomes more important than genes. Marriage emerged and that became dominant.
What have changed since feminism and technology? Is resource no longer important for raising children? Or are we just in a short but abrupt era of change, where only few will adapt and reproduce (men and women in this case). And those that do find a way to adapt will resume on the path of population growth?
Hopefully Africa population will collapse bc that certainly is not the pinnacle
Self improvement for men will improve many areas of his life. Eating better, getting outside and in the sun and working out more will benefit all men. Don’t improve yourself just for women - do it for yourself . Besides, what do you have to lose?
𝖕𝖗𝖔𝖒𝖔𝖘𝖒
I would like to reproduce but not able to date.
Why dont single men have rights to father through surrogacy and women do? Talk about that..