7 Reasons Narcissists Don't Come Back

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  • Опубліковано 21 лис 2024

КОМЕНТАРІ • 325

  • @kathleendinsmore7588
    @kathleendinsmore7588 3 місяці тому +114

    It is amazing how quickly a narcissist will drop you when they realize you have their number.

    • @jasonwimberly5636
      @jasonwimberly5636 3 місяці тому +2

      Damn right….

    • @jemry1990
      @jemry1990 3 місяці тому +3

      What you mean

    • @lilfairycupcake
      @lilfairycupcake 3 місяці тому

      when they know all has been lost, and that mask comes off, you get to see the real animal that lives within. lol idiots.

    • @SST4SSG
      @SST4SSG 3 місяці тому

      ​@@jemry1990It means you're not giving in to their new psycho manipulation attempts anymore. They just thankfully can't take that. (Good riddance to bad garbage.. THE GARBAGE JUST TOOK ITSELF OUT)

    • @hollsee9266
      @hollsee9266 3 місяці тому +3

      What is the number?

  • @josephfigura5227
    @josephfigura5227 3 місяці тому +178

    Once you realize what they are. You will not be hurt. You will leave them in the dust

    • @fitlife1205
      @fitlife1205 3 місяці тому +13

      Facts!! That’s where I’m at… new supply etc I can’t even be jealous bc I know them

    • @everythingtech2023
      @everythingtech2023 3 місяці тому +1

      Not true

    • @SeanGarrett-ff2bd
      @SeanGarrett-ff2bd 3 місяці тому +10

      I’ve heard a great saying, “once you see the ‘real lies’ with ‘real eyes’, you ‘realize’… fill in the blank here (you were being manipulated, that person has issues I am not qualified or responsible to fix, I am better off alone, etc.).
      It is coming to this realization that can be difficult and take time, but once you evolve to this place, you’re in a MUCH better place and have much greater peace of mind.

    • @johnburns9223
      @johnburns9223 3 місяці тому +7

      Not true at all. Just because you understand doesn’t mean it doesn’t hurt

    • @borgullet3376
      @borgullet3376 3 місяці тому +3

      Everyone is right. With this caveat.
      If you don't leave quietly and unexpectedly, in the middle of the night. Leaving no trail or personal information that they can exploit. They Will Come For Blood.

  • @OptimisticMaya
    @OptimisticMaya 3 місяці тому +82

    #7
    “A snake is a snake, no matter how many times they shed their skin.” 💯💯💯💯💯

    • @cc1k435
      @cc1k435 3 місяці тому +7

      Think on that. All you get each time is an even bigger snake. 😮

    • @FoolintheRainSDMF
      @FoolintheRainSDMF 13 днів тому

      ​@cc1k435 which is badass as a pet but absolutely not a partner. Least the snake 🐍 doesn't pretend to not be primal and makes no bones about strangling the life out of something or someone, unlike a partner narc, watch your backs out here yall.
      Snakes are pretty but they don't love you!

  • @stevenwoods2965
    @stevenwoods2965 3 місяці тому +60

    I am just coming out of the fog from one of these relationships. It really hurts to have gone through this experience. These videos are a great help and are very much on point. I never knew my friend was one of those people. I still miss them, but I know that they were toxic. The pain is very exhausting.

    • @lilfairycupcake
      @lilfairycupcake 3 місяці тому +5

      0 contact is the cure. education = understanding. the more you understand, the more you shake your head.

    • @darinvee4980
      @darinvee4980 3 місяці тому +5

      I'm 13 years out and these videos still help me. It does get better, but I'm not going to pretend that going through a relationship with a narcissist doesn't leave permanent scars. I'll never be able to let go of the thought, why didn't I end the relationship when I saw the first red flags? I always convinced myself the good outweighed the bad.

    • @lilfairycupcake
      @lilfairycupcake 3 місяці тому

      @@darinvee4980 i guess we all have scares, but none of mine have anything to do with dealing w any sh it 4 brains narcs. big picture, they were more or less just a blip on the radar, think of it as a learning experience. about the only positive thing you can take away from a narc relationship is "now you know", and thats huge. its the not knowing part that sucks, and im sure u can attest to that. 0 contact, forgive, forget, and move on, is what u should concentrate on. ahhhhhhhhh the red flags! your not the only one who did not see them. there are 100s of thousands of us who also did not see them also, and you feel stupid because of it, well dont; your not. no more stupid than me. what sucks is the vast majority of the population are so narcissistic, self centered, greedy, me me me mine, its hard to find someone, who isnt a narc, or has narc tendencys.

  • @AlexRyan
    @AlexRyan 3 місяці тому +107

    #1: When you expose their true nature
    #2: If you experience significant failures or problems
    #3: When they lose control over you
    #4: Excessive emotional neediness
    #5: The loss of physical attractiveness or sexual interest
    #6: fear of retaliation or retribution
    #7: Establishing a new identity

    • @bobbruce4135
      @bobbruce4135 3 місяці тому +7

      Noticed a lot of this in the females when I was overseas in developing countries. 100% about themselves and what you provide for them.

    • @Hairyderriere
      @Hairyderriere 3 місяці тому

      ​@@bobbruce4135notice this everywhere, to be fair. Developing countries are no worse than rich ones.

    • @rooftopcat1785
      @rooftopcat1785 3 місяці тому +11

      #7 is key. The new fake image, after discard, it helps in snaring a new supply. Ive noticed the nursing field has boat loads of them, i would be cautious dating a nurse, most are for the streets.

    • @luxbeauty4952
      @luxbeauty4952 3 місяці тому

      @@rooftopcat1785agree they’re trashy

    • @OscarTheScrapper
      @OscarTheScrapper 3 місяці тому +5

      call me old fashion, but I long for the days when wives stayed at home and only cost three goats..

  • @Duzykutas
    @Duzykutas 3 місяці тому +17

    Lise has the best narcissism videos on youtube. To anyone wanting to learn about it, you've found the right channel.

    • @BJBlaskovichGaming
      @BJBlaskovichGaming 3 місяці тому +2

      She’s awesome, no doubt, but there are several amazing channels here on tha Tube that kill it when talking about narc facts.

  • @roselineonyeka6023
    @roselineonyeka6023 3 місяці тому +180

    If you are not in the financial market space right now, you are making a huge mistake. I understand that it could be due to ignorance, but if you want to make your money work for you...prevent inflation and invest.

    • @ugochihelen6910
      @ugochihelen6910 3 місяці тому

      Honestly I really need help learning to trade. Seeing my portfolio low makes me very sad

    • @ugochihelen6910
      @ugochihelen6910 3 місяці тому

      Just bought $1k Ethereum and $5k bitcoin with the recent dump in crypto I was told it's the right time to buy and get ready for a skyrocket

    • @yahayaglory3468
      @yahayaglory3468 3 місяці тому

      You're right forex trading is surely a lucrative way to invest whether you want growth, leverage, stable income or something in between.

    • @hannabas8198
      @hannabas8198 3 місяці тому

      It's always a honor to have Jason. here as a mentor, I appreciate him for the time being spent to educate me financially. Regardless of how bad it gets on the economy, I still make over $28K every single month. I truly value Jason graystone fx. and is helpful guides.

    • @stevenaustin3853
      @stevenaustin3853 3 місяці тому

      You just mentioned Expert Jason. Indeed, Jason Graystone fx. has been an incredible mentor to me, imparting a deep understanding of the economy that I wish college had provided

  • @cincyfanjunglecity9871
    @cincyfanjunglecity9871 3 місяці тому +39

    I hate when people say emotional neediness. Of course people have emotional neediness. That’s the sole purpose of being in a relationship. The problem is , and why this is even valid , is because the narcissist withholds affection , love , emotion it’s self , and even sex , but then when you ask for any of those things , that’s when this emotional neediness comes up. It’s just a manipulation tactic to have something they can blame you for.
    Being with my narcissistic ex , I was literally starving for affection and attention from her. But then when you ask for these things they ask why you’re so needy. No it’s not called being needy , it’s called being deprived.

    • @rotcivsi
      @rotcivsi 3 місяці тому +1

      I have heard of the deprived before, but now I get it... I though myself being needy as well... I was just deprived of it out of the blue, it's like removing drug from an addict from a 100 to 0.
      It makes us feel so worthless, at least that's how I felt, and worse, they tell this to people, so you don't know who is really there for you, or is just there to get info to tell him/her.... I still feel kinda worthless tbh

    • @mukesh.dhimar
      @mukesh.dhimar 3 місяці тому +4

      Great comment

    • @lulusheartcenteredalchemy
      @lulusheartcenteredalchemy 3 місяці тому +5

      Yes , abuse

    • @lucyt-c8092
      @lucyt-c8092 3 місяці тому

      @@rotcivsi therapy… it will help

    • @rotcivsi
      @rotcivsi 3 місяці тому

      @@lucyt-c8092 I’ve started it already, but had to stop for now, because of money… but I’ll get back to it asap

  • @mehassan27
    @mehassan27 3 місяці тому +15

    “No matter who you are and what you do , there’s a deeper reason they have to devalue and discard you.”

    • @briandrake6881
      @briandrake6881 23 дні тому

      Actually, you are BETTER than them and they know it and so do the other people.

  • @vickynesh2710
    @vickynesh2710 3 місяці тому +8

    I suffered so much by being with a female covert , Thank you so much for this video , this clearly helps us understand the dynamics .

  • @IsraelXOX-gh9mr
    @IsraelXOX-gh9mr 5 днів тому +1

    Being with my ex narc for the past 8 yrs. made me observe this very pattern. I think they wanted to feel very important in a way that is disturbing. Instead of building trust with their intimate partners, they destroy the trust that they built with you (in that case lying when they tried to put you in their pedestal). Once they have a committed partner, they can’t stand being loved authentically by one person. Instead they go on and prey on other women that is susceptible to their love bombing. My ex narc was a compulsive pursuer in a relationship. He would go back and forth to the women he were involved before or try to meet women in complicated situation so that going public isn’t an option while having you as their main supply. In the end they destroy the very person that loved them. They are like toddlers testing your love for them. Showing and telling them you love them isn’t enough, they will cheat on your face to make you feel inadequate even if you are more than they deserve. They want to test your love for them so they keep hurting you and when you have enough of their abuse, you leave. Then they tell you, ‘you never loved me because you abandon me’. Well in fact it’s their actions and narcissistic behavior that made you leave or in other cases they discard you and will give silly reasons of the discard. Mine would use, ‘she’s crazy’, ‘she’s a nega-star’, ‘she insults me’, ‘she cheated on me’ et al. So with this pattern of infidelities and emotional abuse (who knows what else) it’s better to walk away. I did walk away and is now rebuilding my life with our daughter. We are struggling financially because I’m not earning enough to provide for my daughter but now we get to laugh and bring with us sunshine every day. No lies, no abuse and no fake love. We only live once, forgive yourself and move forward but never forget the lesson that narc abuse taught you. That is to respect yourself to walk away from what’s hurting and destroying you. That you deserve a life of solitude, happiness and love. Hugs*** :) Additionally I got to know about my narc husband bad ways when I reach out to a private detective digitalinvestigate@gmail. com for help he did a perfect work for me I can see everything he’s doing on his device.

  • @MartyKeegan
    @MartyKeegan 3 місяці тому +36

    Bingo!! You are spot on! My pretty, intelligent and successful ex-wife, who never argued with anyone (other than me behind closed doors) and who remains a respected public figure with a stellar reputation-- a woman I've never heard anyone say anything bad about-- she's not what she seems. A year prior to her leaving me out of the blue, she had begun a slander campaign against me with her friends that I was not aware of until after she had left. She led a secret life throughout our marriage that included many lesbian affairs. No one has any idea that she sucks her thumb when she gets upset. No one understands this woman talks to herself in the mirror. She is terrified I will reveal her many secrets to the world, so she pretends I don't exist. It's a like a child who covers their face so they can't see what is scaring them, so the threat doesn't exist. My ex-wife refuses to talk to me or communicate despite the fact I have never yelled at her, called her names, or claimed she ruined my life. I have complied with all of her requests for a divorce. Yet.... she remains terrified I will reveal who she really is publicly. She's absolutely terrified and therefore demonizes me in her own head. It's hard to accept after spending so many years with her, but accept I must and I have.

    • @ChrisPTY507
      @ChrisPTY507 3 місяці тому +1

      Tell her that if she continues the smear campaign against you, you will reveal and expose her true colors to the public. That should keep her defamations in check. Make backups of all the evidence in cloud storage or on an external disk in case she tries to sabotage the evidence.

    • @PassarinvanderWal
      @PassarinvanderWal 3 місяці тому +5

      She already painted you bad in other people eyes. No one will believe you even it’s the truth. Just live your life.

    • @MartyKeegan
      @MartyKeegan 3 місяці тому

      @@PassarinvanderWal Exactly-- and that's what I do. I don't engage and I don't try to explain the truth to others. it's pointless. I just share this for others.

    • @Hairyderriere
      @Hairyderriere 3 місяці тому +1

      Sounds awfully similar to my situation. Not sure I can ever forgive this entity. In this life or any other.

    • @MartyKeegan
      @MartyKeegan 3 місяці тому +11

      @@Hairyderriere I don't forgive her-- I forgive myself for choosing her and allowing myself to be neglected for years. I chose to participate and I'm embarrassed that I did, but it will never happen again. I can make better choices and look at a relationship and its warts for what it is, not what my idealized fantasy is. I think there are more men that go through this than people know, we just don't like to talk about it because it feels humiliating.

  • @WillyNillyBaptistBilly
    @WillyNillyBaptistBilly 3 місяці тому +7

    "What the hell just happened"& "Holy Shit" were the first words outta my mouth when I seen the first video about NPD by YOU towards the end of a 3 year relationship long before I ever knew what NPD was!!! Your video cracked the code!! July of 2022 Thank you 1,0000 times

  • @TJKashatus
    @TJKashatus 3 місяці тому +14

    Been no contact for 2+ months, I miss her but I don't. I don't miss the 1-1/2 years of gaslighting. I pray to God and feel sorry for her next victim....it's sad. Recovery is very difficult....the thoughts, the replaying, the money, cars, gifts, etc...but I never spent more than 3 days with this person...it was a long distance relationship. Not about love....seduction, love bombing, ghosting, trauma bond, manipulation and worst of all gaslighting. I dint wish this on any man. Strategic manipulator, toxic female covert narcissist = pure evil, PERIOD.

  • @dizzysmit
    @dizzysmit 3 місяці тому +7

    i think this is the most useful content on such a behaviour placed on youtube - ever

  • @noturbo
    @noturbo 3 місяці тому +6

    i had tears here but i am close to acceptance of the truth

    • @emilkadd
      @emilkadd 3 місяці тому +2

      All be well. Time is your ally

  • @neommutle8033
    @neommutle8033 3 місяці тому +57

    😂 Your describing my mother. When my dad got sick she left him, when i lost my job she left me.

    • @Pianofy
      @Pianofy 3 місяці тому +3

      Ouch, your mother left you? That's tough.

    • @lilfairycupcake
      @lilfairycupcake 3 місяці тому +1

      sounds like a 1st class sweetheart. hope both of you have the good sense to sh it can her out of your lives.

  • @glendunzweilerproductions2812
    @glendunzweilerproductions2812 3 місяці тому +9

    I definitely had to make myself as unattractive to my ex as possible. She would still come by and visit while it looked like I may be successful at my new life away from her. But, as I kept struggling, she eventually stopped reaching out. The key for me is to remain ‘unsexy’! 😀 Nice video!

  • @AlexRyan
    @AlexRyan 3 місяці тому +39

    Re: #6: Revenge: How I got revenge on my narcissistic ex.
    My violent ex falsely accused *me* of violence and I was charged with a felony. She eventually admitted to the judge in a written letter that she had lied, that she was the violent one and I had done nothing wrong. The charges were dropped.
    Later, while she was still living with me, she got herself pregnant by another guy and tried to convince me that I was the father. Thank God for prenatal paternity tests. The relationship, of course, ended at that point.
    A few years later I discovered that she and her husband were splitting up and each had counter claims of violence filed against the other.
    I sent a copy of her written letter to her husband’s lawyer with details and additional evidence of her long history of violence and making false accusations of violence against myself and other men.
    I wish I could have been in the courtroom to see her publicly confronted with verifiable evidence of her lies in a court of law. Her narcissistic rage would not serve her well in that venue. ;)

    • @LiseLeblanc
      @LiseLeblanc  3 місяці тому +12

      @@AlexRyan I’m happy to hear you were able to help bring the truth to light

    • @AlexRyan
      @AlexRyan 3 місяці тому +2

      You are 100% correct.
      It is a moral error to take joy in the suffering of others.
      Even monsters.
      They cannot help what they are.
      We should have compassion for their suffering and seek to find a cure for the disease instead.
      I am sorry.

    • @millyardopeacecraft9778
      @millyardopeacecraft9778 3 місяці тому +6

      ​@AlexRyan not a disease. A disorder
      Big difference. She knew not to get disorderly in a courtroom. She should know to keep order with herself when it comes to others.

    • @tommy-0791
      @tommy-0791 3 місяці тому +3

      Jesus Christ.Mr Ryan, are you aware of the damage these things do to healthy people? Compassion? I've come through a lot (childhood trauma) and chose to be helpful and decent with other human beings not to become a monster. You wouldn't like my cure for them, so I won't reveal it.

    • @tommy-0791
      @tommy-0791 3 місяці тому

      Apologies Alex, that post was for another poster. 👍

  • @RaffertyMBTI
    @RaffertyMBTI 3 місяці тому +58

    Sam Vaknin said Cluster B people are stuck in childhood, therefore they should be treated with child psychology.

    • @ezdeezytube
      @ezdeezytube 3 місяці тому +15

      He is also a self-confessed narc who should be entirely ignored. He provides so much false info

    • @hurricaneaquatics
      @hurricaneaquatics 3 місяці тому

      ​@@ezdeezytubehave to agree. He's a charlatan. Should go watch that film that guy made about him. He's a habitual liar and a petulant child.

    • @cyndigooch1162
      @cyndigooch1162 3 місяці тому +3

      ​​@@ezdeezytube I totally agree with you and he contradicts himself at times, which is to be expected, but HG Tudor doesn't even do that in his videos! 🙁

    • @chinwenduchinwe586
      @chinwenduchinwe586 3 місяці тому +11

      ​@@ezdeezytube
      True, he is a narc himself but alot of his information is very accurate.

    • @andybankston8413
      @andybankston8413 3 місяці тому +8

      I agree with Vaknin, my wife is a diagnosed cluster B, I bit off more than I could chew and made commitments before I was aware and educated. I literally fell like I’m dealing with a third grader most of the time, she hid it well until we married, then it was almost like someone flipped a switch and I was like “ what the eeefffff have I done, what have I gotten myself into”. Just because you don’t like someone’s attitude or personality doesn’t mean they don’t know what they’re talking about. Where else but from a narc get better info about narcs?

  • @J-AllenMains
    @J-AllenMains 3 місяці тому +4

    Once again, thank you Lisa for your straight forward approach. I was hovered 3 times myself by my ex wife. 16 years together and 3 children made it the most difficult and painful chapter in my life. Turning the page took me 4 years, so many tears and so many unanswered questions. I have started living life once again, finally. You're awesome keep up the good work.

  • @NovaPrincess
    @NovaPrincess 3 місяці тому +23

    The narc didn't come back after I went to the district attorney and told them everything. Telling the truth is usually enough to scare the narcissist away for eternity.

    • @thebirima91
      @thebirima91 3 місяці тому +4

      I am writing a day journal because I cannot remember anymore what damage she’s doing on a daily basis. The worst thing is we have children.

    • @lucyt-c8092
      @lucyt-c8092 3 місяці тому +1

      @@thebirima91the journal is a smart idea .. get some clarity… and then an attorney! Be careful …

    • @thebirima91
      @thebirima91 3 місяці тому

      @@lucyt-c8092 I know. I am not even sure about the outcome. Now that I’ve seen she’s willing to manipulate our small children, I know she’s capable of anything. It’s a f nightmare I am in.

    • @kscott7657
      @kscott7657 3 місяці тому +1

      Yup I told his mother and family and I’m sure the shame and embarrassment will never bring him back to me. He never told his family we were divorced because it hurts his image. He even stopped speaking to his mother for 2 years because of the humiliation. He blames his 76 yr old mother for his childhood which is sad because we are in our 50’s now. 😳
      I wanted to expose the years of cheating and emotional abuse during the entire 18 year marriage. I wanted everyone to know. I was tired of being the compliant wife to make him look good while it tore my self worth apart. I thought something was wrong with me. He withdrew withheld affection and was always on his phone and slept with it. I knew something changed on our wedding night then we had a child 3 years after being married which he begged me to have. Now our son is 17 and I divorced the ex narc. I’m so happy
      Healing and he has not spoken to me since last year. He texts our son when he’s coming to pick him up but will not talk to me which is fine since our son is pretty much older now praise God.
      These narcs are evil and men too withhold sxx from women to control them so don’t get it twisted 😢😓 it’s really bad out here stay safe everyone

    • @NovaPrincess
      @NovaPrincess 3 місяці тому

      @@kscott7657Wow! I am glad to hear that you're getting out and getting your groove back. Nice! I have heard so many people say that the narcissist changed on their wedding night. Narcs let the mask slip when they think you're trapped or can't leave easily.

  • @gangGreenthumb
    @gangGreenthumb 3 місяці тому +24

    "Superior" in terms of being more easily manipulated. "Superior" in terms of being unaware, and naive, and trusting like we once were. But it won't last, or if it does, the narcissist will never be content. They'll always have, at the very least, wondering eyes, bitterly jealous of what others have that they will never have.

    • @fitlife1205
      @fitlife1205 3 місяці тому +1

      Thank you!!! I’m sure like there’s NO WAY the new supply is superior when she said that 😂

    • @rayo1883
      @rayo1883 3 місяці тому +3

      Temporarily "superior" only because the new one hasn't caught on yet.

    • @sittingstill3578
      @sittingstill3578 3 місяці тому +2

      Jealousy and malice, the two core traits of the narcissist. It’s fair to say their eyes are not only wandering but lust filled, as strangers that fulfill their wanton desire for power, wealth or position are always being scanned for.

  • @harperlewis1526
    @harperlewis1526 3 місяці тому +6

    Lise, how did you gain such knowledge about these female narcissists, I mean you nail every single video, down to details, it's scary! Is it working with so many of these women, or their victims, or did you have one in your life? THANK YOU for continuing to make these videos and help us to heal. You touched on one term that I heard on another channel: the pinnacle of indifference [to the narcissist that is/was in your life].

  • @timmaher7826
    @timmaher7826 3 місяці тому +5

    Thank God literally i am free after 20 years of healing..what a journey😅

  • @herberttartarotti2907
    @herberttartarotti2907 3 місяці тому +2

    Fantastic video, Lise? We always learning from you!👏👏👏👏

  • @machinagirl
    @machinagirl 3 місяці тому +6

    They really are. I felt that way too. It’s so incredibly cruel and painful.

  • @HopeFaithExpect77
    @HopeFaithExpect77 3 місяці тому +15

    Pretty sure this is where im at. Been 7mos post discard. Not a peep from her. Ive been zero contact. Shes smear campaign me on social media but no direct contact. Just crazy how a person said loved you over & over then ghosts you by a text to monkeybranch. Cruel. Hope karma finds her.

  • @Plumduff3303
    @Plumduff3303 3 місяці тому +7

    It hurts being discarded

  • @lilfairycupcake
    @lilfairycupcake 3 місяці тому +7

    they hate you, because they dont want to confront their own stupidity, that in turn will hurt their fragile ego. jesus, is that messed up.

    • @rooftopcat1785
      @rooftopcat1785 3 місяці тому +1

      @lilfairycupcake no accountability is a path of least resistance.

  • @irv7332
    @irv7332 3 місяці тому +6

    Holy shit. This video truly caused an epiphany moment for me. I cannot believe I got played so badly.

    • @barbells.dumbbells.thatsit8914
      @barbells.dumbbells.thatsit8914 3 місяці тому +1

      Your not alone. Hard pill to swallow. Took me a whole year to be mentally back on the straight and narrow. Ill be praying for ya.

    • @irv7332
      @irv7332 3 місяці тому

      @@barbells.dumbbells.thatsit8914 appreciate you brother 🙏🏽

  • @nickus51
    @nickus51 3 місяці тому +2

    That was such a good video. After I was discarded, I spent a long time questioning myself, asking what the hell happened, how can someone change so much. It took me 1,5 years of therapy to somewhat rebuild myself with trust still damaged.
    Despite all, I miss the person I thaught she was in the beggining, I definitely don't miss all devaluation, gaslighting, blameshifting, stonewalling, triangulation etc.

  • @Spootiful
    @Spootiful 3 місяці тому +6

    "What the hell happened?" My thoughts exactly, but it wasn't until I broke contact that I experienced the vindictive aspect. Scary and dangerous to expose, knowingly or unknowingly.

  • @apple1234iou
    @apple1234iou 3 місяці тому +3

    I haven’t been here for a while but it’s good to see you are still putting out the videos and spreading the word.🥊

  • @jeffreyexposito3803
    @jeffreyexposito3803 3 місяці тому +12

    I told my ex covert narcassist girlfriend who was hoovering me that she suffered from NPD and that she needs professional help via a text message. I never heard from her again.😊

    • @deepsix1827
      @deepsix1827 3 місяці тому +3

      That'll do it. They can't even conceive of ever being wrong, so to tell them they are mentally ill and need professional help is a narc injury that will likely make them hate you for eternity.

  • @AugustusTiberius-tq1gw
    @AugustusTiberius-tq1gw 3 місяці тому +2

    Mrs. LeBlanc is on point. I'm not perfect by no means and hold myself accountable and do my best to maintain and work out the relationship. My X displayed opposite value then I. Without noticed, my X left me for a rebound guy after a few years together. I feel that I dodged the bullet. Still healing and getting better.

  • @danieljones9334
    @danieljones9334 3 місяці тому +11

    It's even harder when after you leave then they stop you from seeing your two amazing young boys aged 8 and 10 for no justification whatsoever

    • @cc1k435
      @cc1k435 3 місяці тому

      The "justification" is the pursuit of screwing with all 3 of your minds. 😢

    • @lucyt-c8092
      @lucyt-c8092 3 місяці тому +1

      Fight BACK! Don’t let those kids drown in a nasty pool of narcissist ichor ! Those kids NEED a healthy perspective ( assuming that your’s is healthy)

  • @JosephAgnello-tf8em
    @JosephAgnello-tf8em 3 місяці тому +2

    Again,you are 💯 pct RIGHT !
    MY GOD, YOU @UOU HIT " ALL'"
    CYLINDERS !!!!!!
    SHE GAVE ME ADVANCE WARNINGS!
    I VACILITE BETWEENFACING REALITY,and wanting them back !

  • @armanddimeo6575
    @armanddimeo6575 8 днів тому

    It's been six months since my narcissist (covert variety) friend discarded me and the more time goes by, I see that it is a blessing. I feel better without the constant lies, manipulation, and gaslighting.

  • @doranvee5944
    @doranvee5944 3 місяці тому +30

    Glaring double standards. They fear exposure but don't mind devaluing, smearing, destroying you. Instead of working on our.20 year marriage, she decided to smear, trash, and run off with a new lover/supply.

    • @licmir3663
      @licmir3663 3 місяці тому +8

      I know you’re probably deeply hurt now, but once you understand and accept that she’s a narcissist and thus incapable of love, you’ll be glad she left and that she is now someone else’s problem. Now it’s your turn to be happy.

    • @BJBlaskovichGaming
      @BJBlaskovichGaming 3 місяці тому

      @@licmir3663THIS.

    • @doranvee5944
      @doranvee5944 3 місяці тому +4

      @licmir3663 Thank you for saying that. My head agrees, but I was committed, and that didn't matter. I'm better now but cycle back quite often.

    • @VirginiaNative1646
      @VirginiaNative1646 3 місяці тому +2

      Going through this now

    • @UncleChud
      @UncleChud 3 місяці тому +1

      @@VirginiaNative1646be strong❕👍🏻

  • @texasnutmegger3296
    @texasnutmegger3296 Місяць тому

    I was ghosted then got hoovered back in. I went gray rock without realizing what it was. Amazing how I got ghosted again. These videos showed me that it wasn't me and that helped me get over that person.

  • @JohnSmith-wo7ns
    @JohnSmith-wo7ns 3 місяці тому +2

    I never had anything to offer her but she kept me around for 10yrs.

  • @Champman543
    @Champman543 3 місяці тому +2

    We were together for 7 years. She discarded me and replaced me right away, right when I had two small surgeries this month, was depressed, and lost my job. She took her stuff and left like a thief in the night-no closure, no discussion. She didn’t even say goodbye to my family...

  • @elijahmountainfire888
    @elijahmountainfire888 3 місяці тому +8

    You know what ?
    In narcissist's materialistic ego-tripping
    nightmare universe are only 2 kinds of people :
    Allies and enemies.
    Useful and useless.
    Wouldn't wanna live inside that bugger's head.
    Because its wartime 24-7.

  • @patrik-vw4ek
    @patrik-vw4ek 3 місяці тому

    Their disgard is a gift ...takes a few months to realise this once the dust has settled... wretched things aren't they!

  • @RedMedic1972
    @RedMedic1972 3 місяці тому +1

    I am beyond happy that my ex wife has fully discarded me. For too long after going no contact, I was a mess because I thought I was the bad guy and lost something amazing. But that something amazing never existed. It took months to free myself from the grief and pain she caused. I don't consider myself emotionally weak or easily manipulated, but she got the drop on me and before I knew it, I nearly self-destructed. Now, I have my life back and am emotionally and mentally solvent. It will not happen again.

  • @SummitMan165
    @SummitMan165 3 місяці тому

    Very good video ! It’s about what we are dealing with a narcissistic adult child since the last 2 years… continue your good job !

  • @ramikiwan9981
    @ramikiwan9981 3 місяці тому +1

    Thanks for replying to my message and for posting about this issue.

  • @Thedisgardedoptimist
    @Thedisgardedoptimist 3 місяці тому +1

    Crossing fingers I'm in one or more of the 7.....
    Thanks Lise..

  • @Garybob-e9q
    @Garybob-e9q 2 місяці тому

    If they always find better Supply, you are nothing more than a Memory........

  • @danjsilve
    @danjsilve 3 місяці тому +2

    Still trying to distance myself from 2 narcissists. My son and nephew. I can take solace, I will only hear from them when they want something.

  • @kuibeiguahua
    @kuibeiguahua 3 місяці тому +1

    At 2:49 you used the word dissociate to express the word dissociation. They are two separate terms!
    Apart from that, wow im such a fan you taught us so much we are so lucky to have you, thank you for existing! You raise the general safety of humans all around the world!!!

  • @sittingstill3578
    @sittingstill3578 3 місяці тому +2

    I just got a proxied _hoover_ attempt yesterday. What perfect timing for this video. I have found that some forms of manga are great ways to process the exiting of narcissistic relationships. Considering these stories come from Japanese, Korean and Chinese cultures, it is safe to assume that narcissism is a core problem for them too. I experienced my biggest experience in Asia, so I can attest to this. I found that these stories display many of the narcissistic archetypes I witnessed there but who tried to gaslight me to their true nature and objectives. The stories also clearly state the philosophies that the residents try to deny. I watched a few Korean manhwas that reaffirmed their goal to enslave you and work you not only to death but they would keep you enslaved in the afterlife for all eternity if possible. There are many other details I could identify (and had experienced).
    Many of these stories are classified as “revenge” but the reality is that the protagonist (MC) doesn’t actually want revenge. The MC really just wants to be useful to the people around them, make the world a better place and have a loving significant other and core group of friends. Usually the narcissists discard results in them becoming physically separated, going through recovery in a remote area like a forest or wilderness, re-entering society thinking they are nothing only to be recognized for their immense strength and forming the loving community they longed for. The stories fall into two primary groups, one is an MC that grew up in an abusive home or school and has decided to develop social skills. The second is a workplace scapegoat that has been worked to death meeting everyone else’s needs and doing the work of 10 people.
    I thought this might be a new source of viewers that may be coming your way in the near future.

  • @pedrokarstguimaraes1096
    @pedrokarstguimaraes1096 3 місяці тому

    As always You’re absolutely acurrate. Lise you the most profound about this desease! Bravo!

  • @TheAustinGuy
    @TheAustinGuy 3 місяці тому +2

    This is a really good video!!

  • @cmullenmusic
    @cmullenmusic 3 місяці тому +1

    Crucially helpful. Thank you. ❤

  • @markartist8646
    @markartist8646 3 місяці тому +4

    if they sense you are whole and aware and will ultimately expose them...

  • @JohnBlazinni
    @JohnBlazinni 3 місяці тому

    This professional has the best content and on point with all her topics. *LISTEN AND LEARN*

  • @edwong4178
    @edwong4178 3 місяці тому +1

    Knowing myself and how likely I am to give them second chances etc, I use a three-step plan to ensure discard and prevent hoovering:
    1. Promptly lay down boundaries
    2. Call them out on their behaviours
    3. Stand my ground

  • @johnleca
    @johnleca 3 місяці тому +2

    Interesting, would it be a red flag that I am retired LEO and actually kept a file on my wife with her exploits along with the files of people I arrested along with a few murders? Now I know why she repeatedly requested a divorce which I gave her after the final straw of her affair with a co worker and telling me "I will never be honest with you". Geez that was the most honest thing she could have said and sealed the deal. Great video I subscribed.

  • @LisaSmith-yb2uz
    @LisaSmith-yb2uz 3 місяці тому

    You’re absolutely describing my last ex… and I’m still (hopelessly) sporadically addicted to ‘trying to find the/a person I believed that he originally was’ 😢🙁❣️😌👍

  • @aminulislamaamra
    @aminulislamaamra 3 місяці тому +3

    The number 6 is me. LMAO XD. I would not harm her anyways but my threat to expose her behaviors in front of her family and friends scared the shit out of her. I reaffirmed it to see whether I am being cocky or a jerk. Later I found out I was exactly right all along the way.
    I never really 'EXPOSED' her nonetheless. Maybe I should have. Sad, anyways!

  • @desiregoodministry
    @desiregoodministry 4 дні тому

    Perfect! Listen up guys!

  • @richardferrara
    @richardferrara 3 місяці тому

    #2 truly said it all. LACK OF RESOURCES

  • @nicholecornes1915
    @nicholecornes1915 3 місяці тому

    You guys can get soooo much love from a healthy people 💕 i promise you

  • @calvin-coohey2112
    @calvin-coohey2112 3 місяці тому +4

    (26 red flags) RUN
    1. Malignant envy, jealous and needy.
    2. Overly concerned about her looks.
    3. Rude and has no manners.
    4. Plays games, Gaslights
    5. Frequently bored. Doesn't like to be interested in anything, no hobbies
    6. Has difficulty managing her emotions, volatile especially in public, temper tantrums
    7. Constantly seeks attention and approval
    8. Lazy
    9. Overly controlling
    10. Has daddy issues
    11. Never has anything nice to say about other women or your friends
    12. Doesn’t have a plan for her life, or wandering through life
    13. Low self esteem
    14. Harboring hate, hateful toward others
    15. Self-centered , stingy
    16. Brags incessantly
    17. Has no respect for her man
    18. Falsely accuses
    19. Demanding
    20. Untrustworthy
    21. Lacking empathy, cold hearted,
    22. No morals
    23. Substance abuse issues.
    24. Has a bad reputation with past relationships
    25. Sex bombs, devalues, discards
    26. Has tons of tattoos and piercings
    Bonus: Chews tobacco

    • @AugustusTiberius-tq1gw
      @AugustusTiberius-tq1gw 3 місяці тому

      @@calvin-coohey2112Awesome 26 reasons to leave.

    • @rooftopcat1785
      @rooftopcat1785 3 місяці тому

      @calvin-coohey2112 sounds pretty twisted to me. How long did it take to complete your catalog?? I know i wouldn't hang around up to about 7.

  • @dazhatz
    @dazhatz 3 місяці тому +2

    I always feel soothed after watching Lisa's content. You make sense of it all for us, and I think that's the real struggle after the relationship ends. Thankyou for that it's a huge help! ❤

  • @ltopomcfly5583
    @ltopomcfly5583 3 місяці тому

    Lise dropped an S bomb! That's how you know she's going in deep.

  • @seanasbell9368
    @seanasbell9368 3 місяці тому +5

    I thought the whole point of “no contact” was exactly that? Why would I even want her to look back? I don’t even want to cross her mind. I want to stay off of her radar permanently. IF you can get them to do that, you’ve done about the best you can do.

  • @mamun3192
    @mamun3192 3 місяці тому +2

    I have exposed her... And block her & then she & her another friend does final manipulation on me but I said I am not in your control anymore then she again started blaming me also tried her best to hurt me but I remain silent & again block her friend's number.
    She was serious manipulator extremely serious in every sentence she just used to manipulate me & made me confused.
    Always conversation goes one-sided. No constructive discussion, no empathy for me
    Just catching my flaws every second. Insulted me & my family members, friends also about my appearance every single thing like I was her doll. 🙂
    After doing a lot of research why the hell she behaves very aggressively, manipulatives found her characteristics 100% similar to a covert narcissist.. God Saved me 🙂

  • @cyndigooch1162
    @cyndigooch1162 3 місяці тому

    Thank you very much for doing this video because many people say that highly narcissistic exes etc will always return, no matter what, yet some never do. It's not as if they all have an ability to see into the future anyway!
    I've found that those types aren't that interested in me anymore though, especially now that I'm much older. I don't have assets either and have health and trauma issues.
    It's one of the few positive aspects of getting older, but some people, especially men, are downright rude towards me, whereas they're friendly to young women, which is to be expected. 🤗

  • @KingOfTralfamadore
    @KingOfTralfamadore 3 місяці тому

    Love your approach Lise, “Holy Shit!” Perfect

  • @brandonrobertkersjes
    @brandonrobertkersjes 2 місяці тому +1

    Literally my EX GF.

  • @Pianofy
    @Pianofy 3 місяці тому +1

    Watching this video makes me question if I am a narcissist. It would explain why I attract narcissistic people as well.
    I've done: 1 get angry and push away or even break up for being exposed, 2 I start to doubt about my relationship being good for me if my partner is starting to show flaws or if I want a more attractive partner (5), 3 I need a sense of control often but not always, 7 get a new identity, done this a couple of times now and I recently started seeing why I do that.

  • @mariannekoroleva6495
    @mariannekoroleva6495 3 місяці тому +1

    Nature always dreams of a healthy energy exchange. This dream nerver ends... Thank You!!:))!!👍💟🌷💚✨🌈⚓!!🌠

  • @vand8n
    @vand8n 3 місяці тому +7

    *sigh :( it’s been 2 years since the discard and I still haven’t reached full acceptance

    • @lucyt-c8092
      @lucyt-c8092 3 місяці тому

      therapy therapy therapy!

  • @MichaelRichards-n5v
    @MichaelRichards-n5v 3 місяці тому

    Wow, when I retired I got all 7 steps towards me. I ran and she hovered for 5 years until she found a new supply. Yes it was hard but your advise is dead one. Thank you!

  • @DennisIsadore
    @DennisIsadore 3 місяці тому +4

    ALL SEVEN!!! Don't know if anyone else has experienced this EXTREME of a (Covert) Narc, but YES... ALL 7!!!

  • @nicetalkintoya
    @nicetalkintoya 3 місяці тому

    Your content is very good and your delivery is solid. You don't need to cut away to those images to illustrate your points. They are actually jarring and distract from your message.

  • @josemanuelsanchezrosales1066
    @josemanuelsanchezrosales1066 3 місяці тому

    Made my day with that intro, spot on

  • @taylorkt333
    @taylorkt333 6 днів тому

    I realized what she was and called her out on it one night over dinner, she stormed out of the restaurant, we went home, she packed her things, and I took her to a hotel at her insistence. I still didn’t fully understand what had happened, but I got angry and told her she treated me like garbage and, good riddance, and pushed her luggage across the hotel lobby. But I couldn’t understand what it was, and didn’t want to believe it was what it was. So I tried for nearly a year to “fix” it. Suffice it to say, I had it right, and should have left it alone after that night, but I had to go through the process. It’s very hard to accept that someone marked you, took advantage of you, and that your emotional connection was not real.

  • @enoshore2488
    @enoshore2488 2 місяці тому

    I did finally break ties but this wasn't easy because it was my father. My whole childhood was a huge love bomb and I thought we had an amazing relationship until I was a teenager and his true colours started to show. I still tried everything I could to manage his control, betrayal and manipulation into something I could atleast live with to no avail. I wish I could get back the years I wasted but atleast I got out. Some of my other family members weren't so lucky.

  • @grahamabarnes
    @grahamabarnes 3 місяці тому +1

    The one I knew was reading books like the 48 laws of power and other manipulation books and highlighting parts in them, I’m glad I got out but nearly lost my shirt (10k down) in doing so.

  • @s.williamc.
    @s.williamc. 3 місяці тому

    Thank you Lise

  • @willemkoppier4540
    @willemkoppier4540 3 місяці тому +1

    From reason 4 to 3 to 1 to 6
    Kept coming back and I decided to destroy the fantasy myself. Not a very safe approach concerning a malignant narcissist but in the end I succeeded. Free for 1,5 years now. Occasional encounters happen and also texts shifting all the blame onto me and trying to trigger me into engaging in verbal arguments. But that is history. Its been quiet now since april of this year. Its a stubborn one🤷🏻‍♂️

  • @henrycatinella1748
    @henrycatinella1748 3 місяці тому

    It’s very good description

  • @Zookeeper.
    @Zookeeper. 3 місяці тому +2

    I came to a reasonable idea that "narcissists" are hosts to, let's say, "inner deamons"..
    Once you discarded all of "yours" (and losing your ego in the process is the best way to go IMHO) then everything else is kind of angelic..
    Then confronting narcissistic individuals becomes super-easy.. just be careful, some are dangerous on multiple levels including physical and spiritual...
    Take care 🖐️

  • @warriorpoet9629
    @warriorpoet9629 3 місяці тому +1

    Thank god for that. It’ll be a one way trip if she does.

  • @GBiv78
    @GBiv78 3 місяці тому

    Once they've broken you you're no longer a prize they want. If having you isn't social media worthy then you're worthless to them

  • @Tails7212
    @Tails7212 3 місяці тому

    Best channel on youtube!

  • @g-dcomplex1609
    @g-dcomplex1609 3 місяці тому +1

    I can tell you this much, i refuse to let her back around, restraining order, trespass warrent, the threat of violence, it's like she is a robot programmed to find me so attractive after a few months when i was the worst person ever over and over in a simulation loop, no matter how long ago i cut call ties with her, they have a relationship with you in their heads, 😮

  • @albertbrady712
    @albertbrady712 3 місяці тому

    Hoping for all the above now

  • @elainebines6803
    @elainebines6803 3 місяці тому +2

    Let's hope they do discard you!

  • @SweetyJain-so2zr
    @SweetyJain-so2zr 3 місяці тому +1

    Thanks ma'am 😊

  • @gregorizi
    @gregorizi 3 місяці тому

    Narcissistic behaviour is created by society. All healthy relationship are you give something and receive something.

  • @lorishu48103
    @lorishu48103 3 місяці тому

    100 percent true re narcs never forgive if they catch you talking about them even if you were only doing so to get reasonable support for example if they are your boss or parent especially if in authority they treat you like a mutineer banned from all the reindeer games, I keep my post narc nose so bright shining truth and Santa knows I’m the best and driving the sleigh 🛷 tonight and all nights, don’t look back❤ thanks Lisa 🙏🏻

    • @lucyt-c8092
      @lucyt-c8092 3 місяці тому +1

      Amen Rudolph !!Keep shining!

  • @BigAndyG
    @BigAndyG 3 місяці тому

    Lise is just gorgeous.

  • @moritzmaisky4989
    @moritzmaisky4989 3 місяці тому

    Exactly me ex girlfriend. She blocked me on the funeral of my mother. 3 days later I asked the keys back, and she replied coldly and offered to meet because she wouldn’t trust the post. I said “no” and blocked her. 2 weeks later she stood in front of my door. I shouted at her that I would never want to see her ever again and threw her keys. She walked away and blocked me.

  • @markanthony168
    @markanthony168 2 місяці тому

    Hardest part for me, she has two kids that I care for very deeply and she has used them to manipulate me.

  • @michaelstrong3587
    @michaelstrong3587 3 місяці тому

    Thank you.