They won't teach you this one in tactics school...
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- Опубліковано 26 кві 2023
- The Phallus of Doom is a well respected and effective tactic used by all great men. In Total War: Warhammer 3, it's a very powerful tactic for instantly bypassing the enemy frontline.
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"Dont be charging into any ol' hole". That's quality advice that will last you a lifetime
If only I'd known that before I decided to have my twelfth birthday party during Marco Polo day at my Catholic overnight pool party prayer retreat... ...
More good advice: Always watch your flank...
😮🕍😶🌫️😳➡️🚫⬅️
Go with Allah. 🐧
Not just charging, dis-charging works too
@@AlexLee-je5jg 😆
how dare you sir, as a consummate Cocksman I wield my "phallus of doom" any which way I want!
As a happily married father of three and a veteran to boot, I wholeheartedly and emphatically agree, this one is in the top 3 tips.
"To make good use of your phallus you need a hole."
Yes, go on.
A Glory Hole
glorious.
*"And as your wife likes to remind you"*
I was just minding my own business eating my sandwich and my mans over here choosing VIOLENCE
if it give you any consolations, realistically it isn't about the size, it's about the taste
@@Rise65487 that's somehow even more gross
@@Rise65487 of the sandwich right?
Slaaneshi enemy lines after you penetrate them with your phallus of doom: “harder!”
Khornate: I'm gonna pound you slaaneshi bastards!
OH NO NO!!!
Thatr comment... sad but truly slaaneshi..
thotticus BEGONICUS
Remember to be careful if you manage to get your phallus in the rear.
Make sure you have your void shields
I always wondered if any ancient tacticians ever realized that this tactic would ever be called... this.
Well, considering that drawing on the Roman Coliseum… I’d say they probably knew…
In fact I would be shocked if they did not call it themselves that…
@@kornelskitek7681 probably named Biggus Diccus
@@SusaVile i was thinking "the Snake" or Draco
Lmao I seriously doubt this is a tactic that would ever have worked in real life.
Zerkovich: *Makes a video about the Phallus of Doom*
also Zerkovich: *Doesn't include a single Slaanesh faction in the video*
What sort of heresy is this?!
Talk about missed opportunities
That would be too obvious :D
It's called edging, and trust me, slaanesh is on board.
The good kind, we are men of the Imperium, chaos scum!
The penetrating power of the Phallus cannot be overstated
It's really important not to leave your phallus exposed to anti-large bonuses when executing. If you're uncertain about safety abstaining from penetration might be the wisest approach. Barriers can definitely help but they're not guaranteed, they can fail.
Sex Ed through Warhammer
the Best part of the Phallus of Doom is when you slip in a fire wizard and have an explosive finish all over the enemies conquered holes.
If your Phallus of Doom is on fire after penetrating the enemy's holes, you may need to get checked by a Life Wizard...
"so to pull this tactic off.. Jesus Christ" 😂
Yep. That got me.
@@jessegreco8855 Agreed, lost it right there; well played Zerk, well played :D
This classic spartan technique was also dicussed in the historically based film Meet the Spartans. Such formations are great for penetrating enemy lines in any battle!
*_Phallus Of Doom 2: Meatstick Boogaloo_*
I have been at work since 6am (its 8:30pm now) and I just sat down to take a break before closing and watching this is the best thing I have seen all day. I am laughing so hard I have had a few staff come into my office to ask if I am ok..... Love it and thank so much for the video and the comedic take on the video its magical!!!
Bro, when you said " Jesus Christ " i started to laugh uncontrollably. Your bloopers are among the funnest when it happens, like in the khorne overwiew video.
It's good to consider what reserves your opponents have before committing.
As always, watch out for traps.
And the troll immediately start to waiver upon contact with an enemy XD
Bloody hell I've been using that formation for god knows how long and never thought to go through the gaps in the middle 😂 Nice one of mighty beard 🙏
@1:54 "You've always got the Phallus of Doom to fall back on" 🤣
Best Warhammer content (both in tactics and humor) I’ve seen this year from any channel. Bravo 😂
I think one of the biggest things that maker settlement battles a pain is that the footprints of the buildings extend farther than it looks like they should. Just look at that building at @7:40. The buildings all have an invisible base that you cant drag out over or move over. So you have extremely limited corridors to draw out unit shapes on and since you cant see the "legal" or permitted areas you have to keep trying until you get something that isn't very useful.
This also causes your units to position themselves in weird directions exposing the sides for attack. Or you just cannot form a long enough line to not be surrounded. I like the idea of minor settlements, but the execution is shit.
@@Sandman-cr6zn If we could hit the spacebar and see the lines of those building bases that would be a great first start.
Sadly it's not even just buildings, cuz it'll happen with irregular terrain like cliffs and rocks and whatnot on field battle maps too, or near the edges of the maps. There's just a whole lot of wonky obstacle detailing everywhere across the whole game, just that the sieges and settlements make it overwhelmingly more obvious.
@@shadowblade5656use all of that to your advantage. That’s what Napoleon would do.
I didn't even watch yet. Liked because the genius title and graphic.
so 50 seconds in and already 5 jokes concerning phalus', this is gonna be good ;)
The AI loves doing this lmao. I see a three-dog wide chaos warhound conga line sneak through all the time.
0:41 dude is dropping truth bomb in combo
I'll now use this strategy every time I play a Slaaneshi faction.
Phallus of Doom and Hoemasters are my favourite running jokes on this channel.
Honestly, I've probably watched 100 of your videos, but this is probably my favorite
Been using the phallus of doom since the Chorfs came out but it’s a defensive Phallus. a couple melee units slightly further forward by 2 units or so than ranged, and the melee units stretched twice as wide, the ai can’t aim a charge at your gunners and if anything is alive after they’ve blown their load, the Phallus comes in to sweep up the leftovers and the multiple blunderbuss/fireglaive units that can all fire on a single unit at once melt any unit, hero or lord.
If anything gets close to the front line is when suddenly the head of the phallus breaks through my front line to sweep up the leftovers
watched this whole playlist and def learned a bit on strategy, much appreciated can maybe up the difficulty now
I use narrow formations on stuff like zombies sometimes. Lower surface area to slow how fast the enemy chews through them. Also in siege battles, narrow lines can work better for making clogs while forcing their formation to reveal more of their flanks.
Special mention to Vcoast gunlines. Where chevrons tend to die a bit too quick.
Yeah, I always use squares of infantry, and then line up ranged to shoot into the sides of the enemy bunching up on them. Same reason, I just want the infantry to hold, and a narrow formation leaves less of my infantry in combat.
excellent vid, will have to implement. also, great advice on what to do with holes.
Great video really good to see how being mobile such as exploiting gaps and adaptable such as flanking works
Great formation. One thing I've done is wider gaps between infantry which serve as lanes for chariots to move through while the front lines engage. Ends up mucking up the spears and giving the chariots alot of space to move
Finally the forbidden strategum of Biggus Dickus Taticus
Great with Shotgun Style Missile Infantry as well, since you likely left gaps for them to shoot through anyhow. Once an opening is provided, you can move in and shoot the flanks/back unimpeded.
Great , now one of the strategies I have been using since ROmE 1 is going to go viral 😂
very excited to try this new position on the field
I was today years old having played it since release when I found out TWW3 had a battleplan drawer
love your puns, make 'em rain !
Good fun and useful - a great combination :)
Great stuff, cheers Zerk
Mate I love your videos. Thank you. It makes my TW experience so much better by being able to actually know wtf I'm doing
PS those tactics videos are amazing. Like the Empire doing only Napoleon tactics. It really makes me appreciate the diversity of this game
Thank you
Frederick the Great of Prussia pulled this off at the Battle of Hohenfriedberg when his dragoons charged through the center and routed a few Austrian battalions
I think the phallus of doom could be very useful in multiplayer as long as you don't make the phallus in deployment
Most of the time players only watch the flanks for cav, seeing the centre lines as a bit too thick or narrow or dangerous to try and get through
Usually spears and halberds are placed on the flank because that's how everyone uses cavalry
Especially when you use explosion spells to MAKE a hole lol
This makes me want to see a full innuendo (IN-YOUR-END-OH) series of tactical breakdowns.
i like to use narrow formations for a defensive open spots - for example for cannon holes/ most gunpowder ranged units or beast/fire mages at both edges of the hole i place them narrowly to not have them get overrun to fast while still provoking their infantry to attack them and fill the hole
THE DOOM-PHALLUS RETURNS!!!!
The tactic videos are by far my fav
I've been watching a ton of your videos, and I must really suck at this game because all my units get stuck on the enemy so I can't do anything. I rarely use Calvary for this reason, and it really saps the enjoyment of the game for me.
Very enjoyable to watch. Keep 'em coming.
big fan. waiting for more mulit player matches. i love you coms.!
Can't wait to try my new phallus tactics
Very mature Zerkovich
Alexander would be proud for the tactic and the naming!
This is a classic M2TW manouver
Zerko could you elaborate a proper dissertation on the proper use of direct fire ranged units? Blunderbusses, thunderers, handgunners, etc. Many thanks :D
Yes please. I suck at using them so much.
Sometimes the Units suck, they got free Line of sight, but won't fire effektive:/
Just like he says in this video, just have them penetrate the hole of your choice, then blast their load of bullets all over their targets' rear.
Love it. I use a similar tactic in sieges. Rarely do street blocking units stay wide enough to stop you from marching a unit in narrow file through a gap. With buildings in the picture, your units will often hug the terrain, going practically single file. Edit: should have waited till the end of the video 😅
This will be a wonderfull video!
This works well with ranged units as well... If you move some Thunderers through in that formation they can punish the flanks. If you put flanking ranged units on the side stacked up longways like that you march them ahead and when you reposition them to attack you change to the wider formation and they have to move less to be in position to attack.
Another thing I do is keep ranged units in as square a formation as I can to minimize the downtime if they have to turn to face a target. Longer Or Wider formations take longer to reform.
Also spears it anti cav units that are there to babysit infantry. If you advance them in a skinny formation like this on the flanks, save time reforming to defend the sides
I am a simple man. I see phallus of doom i click.
I love this tactic. Must try is today
Duke: “where’d you study tactics boy?”
Me:
So I'd like to add some info. Try this with Dwarf armies using flamethrower infantry. And you can also leave gaps that are angled rather than having one long line. By walking the framers through the gap they can attack along the length rather than the width causing more damage and kills and if you don't want to lose those framers then change the angle of a single unit to hold off enemy main line and use your framers who are still safely behind your line to again fire along the length of the unit.
This is how I play dwarfs more often than not since it simple destroys. Leads to each flamer unit having 3 to 5 hundred kills at least
Lure their cavalry units away to charge into the gap into the soft target units.
Excellent work.
epic video. lots of laughter, thanks ^^
Here's Zerk, teaching lessons that have been forgotten.
The same style of gaps are used to make gunpowder units work.
As long as there's an opening you can unload into anything you want.
Another trick with gunpowder is putting one unit of your frontline slightly ahead from the rest and placing your guns sideways behind it, so they have perfect vision of anything that clashes with the rest of your frontline.
awesome tactic
Also, if you're not a fan of charging your phallus straight into the hole, you can use the same infantry tactic to create holes for your gunpowder/ranged units to shoot in from a distance
thats actually cool ty
I love a good micro phallus
in tabletop bretonnian knights had a special lance formation in a wedge shape.
I like how you didn't just stick with the default, but included doggy as well.
2:13 as long as you charge another unit then the one some models are in contact with, the charge will start if the distance is over minimum
"To fall back on- nooooo" The regret in this man's voice immediately lmao
Every time I watch a total war Warhammer from you I end up playing a new campaign 😅
"A wedge is just a pointier phallus of doom" - Zerko
I saw a video of a Korean police unit use something similar.
Attack crowd, pull back, identify the leaders,
designated force crashed through, collected them.
Great stag knights would be great for this, small unit count combined with fast movement and good damage is devastating for either hammer and anvil or smashing down their ranged units
Hi, very interisting content as always, I was wondering how you test the units. I mean, it almost looks like you control the units of the AI when you test for example the best infantry
I used this strategy in every ToW game since the first Rome:TW. I always called it "Stabbing dagger"-Formation because like a knights dagger it finds a crack in the armor of the opponents armor and deals the killing blow. Now you have destroyed my perfect image of this strategy and I will never not think of it as the "Phallus of Doom" manouver ... damn you comedyyyyy!!!!
4:54 That's one juicy Comet of Cassandra there.
Looks like we found the guy who mows the Royal Lawn for King Charles.
That is a good one when you sneak into a castle right pass the infantry unit.
Very good tactics 👏 👌 👍.
What are you doing, steppe-brother?!
2:09 - missed opportunity to say "straight through the hole" honestly
the thumbnail dragged me in im not gonna lie
I have used this a lot as Vampire Counts: Zombies/Skellies up front, wait for gaps, then put more powerful infantry and monsters through the gaps.
It’s like I was getting strategy for something else, something personal
This formation is perfect for penetrating the front and rear lines of the enemy.
Just remember to buff your troops with defensive spells for added protection.
I like it!
Every other line of dialog in this is a double entendre. Genius.
Lord Kroak's splooge-nuke is never going to look the same...
i use narrow formations to squeeze threw gaps in the lines so i can flank ALL the time
Genius!
with Bretonnia, you can use the lance formation to form the tip of the phallus too
...for ze lady
Big Richard plays with some inadvertantly good life advice 4:10
I use this without the puns. I use the chariots clear and run cav in right behind them. Get to start a hammer and anvil from the center. My favorite way to rush the dwarves
Gotta love the thumbnail
This can be very useful in multiplayer as well because -unlike AI- there will be initial gaps in the frontline by default so you can sneak trough some infantry and your enemy have to decide if they go against that with their cav and leave their flanks empty or let them run trough backline. This only works if you have more units tho obviously
A good player will keep a tight formation without gaps. It's the first rule of medieval battlefields. Maintaining a shieldwall and protecting your flank. Flying units and magic kinda messes with basic tactics though.
@@tacticaltactability yes but as you said some things messes up this in this game.
If you make a tight shield wall your frontline will be much shorter so you will be encircled and flanked. Not to mention the wind spells which can hit all of your units there.
With proper spacing you will have a wider front line (not with huge gaps to let units slipping trough tho) so you can hold off a larger host. Check out some MP tournament and see how they place their units
You can go really deep with this tactic.