It's always the "friend" she says not to worry about is the one she monkey branches to. Relationships that come from monkey branching almost always fail, and she'll come crawling back. Don't ever take her back! Be sure to set boundaries guys, and walk away if she doesn't respect them!
I don’t know if I’m too kind or whatever but now I just want my ex to crawl back like yours did so I can tell him to take some time alone and grow as a person if he’s really that mentally unhealthy as a person as these videos say he is I want him to do better we are still young barely in our 20s he still has time to become a better person he just needs to be set on the right path
I agree 100%. Never ever, ever take them back. Ewwww!! Right words NO TURNING BACK!!! The first days,, months and a year, you will hurt, really hurt. But we are MEN, we deal with problems, pain and whatever the world bring. I dealt with my break up ALONE,, the pain was there. Only the males in my family know. The females have no clue what I was going through. This means the tough love from the males put me through. I cut all contact from the get go and never look back. She reach out through one of my brothers. I said to my brother “let’s talk about something else”. And that was that! Coach Paz you’re GREAT!!!
All the respect for you. Keep up the good work. My wife just monkey benched and I never want her back. I just wanted to see what is going in her head for my healing. But I would never ever want her back. I respect very much your point on this.
I love your videos. You have evidence that is right on. Yes, the monkey branch. It's been nine months since my ex fearful avoidant monkey branched. We were together four years in a mostly good relationship/situationship. When it became real and he developed deep feelings, he began the slow fade. I noticed he felt uncomfortable talking about feelings so I let it go. I am mostly secure, independent, and have my own life. I let him have his space. He monkey branched to a woman with emotional problems, aided by her family who wanted to help her with an issue. "Low hanging fruit", let's call it what it is. My ex wanted to date and be friends with me. He even tried to minimize our relationship. That's what avoidants do AVOID. Nope, no friendship, no tears, no questions, no complaints, I let him go and wished him well.. Deleted social media, phone contacts, threw s**t out. I am tough and I don't play. My heart was broken, but I am healing and becoming my best self. Actually, I am happier now that his a** is not around. In hindsight, I think they are a better fit. They both have emotional problems and are probably compatible.
My heart goes out to you. I've just found out seven months after being discarded by my FA ex (4yrs living together, doing IVF to start a family too) that he monkey branched. He was extremely abusive and turned violent during the relationship, but also expressed genuine distress about this, what I now understand is an extreme pushaway. Obviously he had considerable positive qualities or I wouldn't have stayed. I didn't know about attachment theory until I moved out, for my own safety, and I am FA as well - however I've been in intensive therapy for some years for childhood trauma, so I embraced the self-work, he didn't, we stayed together working on things and were going to move back in but the more emotionally secure I got, the worse his rages and attacks got. I relate to your story because after the break up, he blocked me, leaving me with considerable shared bills, as well as frozen embryos - outright ghosted me. He's also rewritten history about our relationship, it's disturbing. I now think severe avoidants cause their partners more damage than narcissists. Finding out about this other girl is a relief on some level even though it's brought up all the pain all over again. It's scary to think how much damage these people go on to do to the next person. Take care of yourself.
Wow. It's amazing what these people can put you through. Happy you are out of the nightmare. Continue working on yourself. I am finally healed, and can see a bright future ahead. I plan to remain single , at least for the near future. I am focusing on my life now.Take care of yourself.💕🙏
In hindsight my ex who cheated on me was very emotionally immature. 5 years, every single day she was my only priority. I lost myself in the process and the rest is history. One thing that has really helped move forward each day is not so much forgiveness but consciously doing my best to not hold resentment. She is human, she fucked me in the most painful way but I hope she is well. I think being the bigger person when someone betrays and hurts you is pivotal to growth and moving forward.
Sorry to hear that brother. I've made similar mistakes as you. Mine left me after 7 years, took our dog and went to her mum. She started dating a guy after 3 weeks. Had to tell me that, because she thought it would make it "easier" to let her go... I've made the mistake to reach out and chase her after a month of no contact. In your case, don't take her back, never....
Glad forgiveness is the path forward for you. My view is that it's not necessarily pivotal nor even essential for everyone in order to move forward - my situation involved DV and sounds very different from yours. Unfortunately some of us have had our compassion and forgiveness used as weapons against us for so long, that what's pivotal to moving forward is to stop forgiving and see people for what they are. For me, once I process the pain of this, indifference is my goal. Take care
Just found your videos this morning Paz. Just tonic needed. Thanks for your straight up, no BS, logical appraoch. Very refreshing. Looking forward to new videos and going through the archives.
Thank you my dear friend! Your words means the world to me, I’m glad to be of service to you, please let me know me know if you have any questions or suggestions for further videos. I got you 💪🏽
Thanks brother. This time is for sure all about healing, and shoring up the blindspot that allowed me to get into this mess. Objects in mirror are not as close as they appear.
Lets be real here, if they are already emotionally immature as an adult, if they have not, on their own, started intense therapy, they will NEVER become emotionally mature. EVER. YOU cant make them mature, nobody can. Only they can. But they wont. Do yourself the respect of going through the greiving and healing process, and not only moving forward with your life, but YOU becoming even more emotionally mature. Let them lead their very unhappy life.
Cheating is whatever is breaking the agreed upon rules of the relationship. Banging with other people, for instance, is not cheating if that's agreed upon - polyam relationships for example.
i am actually in the stage, where I don't know where she monkey-branched or rebound into another person. Said she met a person 2-3 weeks after break up, they are only getting to know each other... usually i would believe her, but before the breakup we were silent for two weaks and went out alone as a passive-aggressive action. Told me: " what does it bother you? You don't even care for me and ask me where i am going?" I believe she met him in this time, but didn't do anything and had him more as backup..
@@megachristina12ify Thank you for the answer. I think in my ex's case it might work because luckily she found someone very close to her place and she found things she were looking for in a man. I don't wish her bad but leaving me this way just not fair to my side and I wanted so hard to fix everything and wanted another chance but no. She immediately started living with the new guy and threw me away.
yes correct but What if You are mostly at fault of why she/he mo key branched or cheated? like maybe youre overly jealous,needy,controlling,possesive, anger issues,emptionally abusive..? enough reason for him/her to cheat... and you want them back because you know you can work things out after you do all the work to change, etc.
You perfectly described why my ex broke up with me. He told me that he wanted to feel butterflies in the stomac again. 🤦🏻♀️ ignorant. he will be at the same spot in one year with his new monkey branch gf.
Unfortunately I didnt give enough attention, support and future guarantee she was looking for in our relationship and I pushed her away sometimes. I didnt cheat or didnt talk with other girls. Then she monkey branched. When we sat for the last time flowers on my hand and begging her to give me another chance, she was cold and told me she was seeing another guy. That week they started to live together. I blame myself since then and month passed by, they are happy and I'm in excruciating pain, I keep blaming myself and cant move on. She was the greatest I had partner until now. I miss her deeply. My ex posted stories on social media which she never did with me. I don't know what to do, even now I'm ready to take her back.
I’m sorry to hear that my friend, sounds like you’re having a hard time letting her go… if you want to talk to me about it I can help you. You can book an appointment with me in this link: bit.ly/coachpazgoldman
@@PazGoldmanOfficial Thank you for the answer, I'm curious to hear that in your other video you told rebound relationships never work %100, does monkey branching the same or is there a chance that it works? Just knowing she is with someone else better than me happy and not even thinking about me, so difficult for me to accept.
@ferit7418 you’ve got to find a way to accept it My Brother and instead of being bitter about this become better work on yourself! It doesn’t matter if her relationship will be successful or not what matters is are you going to be successful? or are you going to let this destroy you?! I understand it. You’re going through hard times right now, but you can choose to your energy towards positive outcomes. Your choice brother, what’s it going to be?
@@PazGoldmanOfficial I watched some of your videos. So many good Info. Also watched your documentary, and Man, you said so many stuff and did so many things that I did throughout my breakup, crying, all the ups and downs, missing her, wanting her back, wanting to change things and many other things. It was like watching myself. Great content, appreciated, keep up the good work. I'm sure you will be a guide to many such as myself.
God help you if you're unfortunate enough to get sick! Monkey Branchers lack the emotional maturity to support you...mine was afraid to be honest with me but talked to all our friends about things that should have been communicated between us..... saw him behind me in a store and he left ( guess he couldn't face me). They know what they are doing.. they don't want to face the truth and be accountable...mice not real men
Is it still considered monkey branching if my ex leaves me for his own reasons but has still been talking to his female friend about our issues through the last several months… and then quickly after we split he starts seeing his friend and she moves in with him? He said she had nothing to do with the breakup or the reasons behind it.
No, it does not consider his monkey branching. The reasons of him going with another woman after he’s been with you should be enough for you to move on and forget about him . If you need help and guidance through your break up and healing journey, feel free to email me paz@pazgoldman.com
@@PazGoldmanOfficial I don’t want him back- but she had a crush on him for years… never made a move because she was with someone else. Once they broke up, she quickly started going after my ex and I didn’t feel like it was my right to tell him who to be friends with or not. I knew for the years prior he saw her as a sister. I’m not sure when it changed.
@@Deanna1295 They both sound like creeps to do something like that - and I'm sorry but that is monkey branching, they may not have slept together but that's an emotional affair, and sounds like it was going on long term. My heart goes out to you - you deserve way, way better. Take care and I hope you heal through this quickly and find someone much better quality.
@@rebecca_stone the most hurtful part was how he ghosted right after this past new years, and for the 3 years we were together he treated me very well. Once he was done he was completely done. It’s been 6 months as of last week and I’m still struggling.
@lilywashere_ you so much for letting me know this Lily. It means a lot to me.! Please feel free to ask me any questions or give me suggestions for future videos that can help you 🙏🏽
Moving on is the best decision I ever made. You completely flip the power dynamic when you let the person go, and just move on with your life.
Ironically they will contact you after you move on ..!
It's always the "friend" she says not to worry about is the one she monkey branches to. Relationships that come from monkey branching almost always fail, and she'll come crawling back. Don't ever take her back! Be sure to set boundaries guys, and walk away if she doesn't respect them!
I don’t know if I’m too kind or whatever but now I just want my ex to crawl back like yours did so I can tell him to take some time alone and grow as a person if he’s really that mentally unhealthy as a person as these videos say he is I want him to do better we are still young barely in our 20s he still has time to become a better person he just needs to be set on the right path
I agree 100%. Never ever, ever take them back. Ewwww!! Right words NO TURNING BACK!!!
The first days,, months and a year, you will hurt, really hurt. But we are MEN, we deal with problems, pain and whatever the world bring. I dealt with my break up ALONE,, the pain was there. Only the males in my family know. The females have no clue what I was going through. This means the tough love from the males put me through. I cut all contact from the get go and never look back. She reach out through one of my brothers. I said to my brother “let’s talk about something else”. And that was that!
Coach Paz you’re GREAT!!!
Wanting an ex back who monkey branches/cheats is like watching a movie for the second time and expecting a different ending.
All the respect for you. Keep up the good work. My wife just monkey benched and I never want her back. I just wanted to see what is going in her head for my healing. But I would never ever want her back. I respect very much your point on this.
I love your videos. You have evidence that is right on. Yes, the monkey branch. It's been nine months since my ex fearful avoidant monkey branched. We were together four years in a mostly good relationship/situationship. When it became real and he developed deep feelings, he began the slow fade. I noticed he felt uncomfortable talking about feelings so I let it go. I am mostly secure, independent, and have my own life. I let him have his space. He monkey branched to a woman with emotional problems, aided by her family who wanted to help her with an issue. "Low hanging fruit", let's call it what it is. My ex wanted to date and be friends with me. He even tried to minimize our relationship. That's what avoidants do AVOID. Nope, no friendship, no tears, no questions, no complaints, I let him go and wished him well.. Deleted social media, phone contacts, threw s**t out. I am tough and I don't play. My heart was broken, but I am healing and becoming my best self. Actually, I am happier now that his a** is not around. In hindsight, I think they are a better fit. They both have emotional problems and are probably compatible.
In my case the cause was fearful avoidant. That's what they do. They also ghost. Also, the new love has no idea that I exist!! Can you imagine that!!
My heart goes out to you. I've just found out seven months after being discarded by my FA ex (4yrs living together, doing IVF to start a family too) that he monkey branched. He was extremely abusive and turned violent during the relationship, but also expressed genuine distress about this, what I now understand is an extreme pushaway. Obviously he had considerable positive qualities or I wouldn't have stayed. I didn't know about attachment theory until I moved out, for my own safety, and I am FA as well - however I've been in intensive therapy for some years for childhood trauma, so I embraced the self-work, he didn't, we stayed together working on things and were going to move back in but the more emotionally secure I got, the worse his rages and attacks got. I relate to your story because after the break up, he blocked me, leaving me with considerable shared bills, as well as frozen embryos - outright ghosted me. He's also rewritten history about our relationship, it's disturbing. I now think severe avoidants cause their partners more damage than narcissists. Finding out about this other girl is a relief on some level even though it's brought up all the pain all over again. It's scary to think how much damage these people go on to do to the next person. Take care of yourself.
Wow. It's amazing what these people can put you through. Happy you are out of the nightmare. Continue working on yourself. I am finally healed, and can see a bright future ahead. I plan to remain single , at least for the near future. I am focusing on my life now.Take care of yourself.💕🙏
My ex monkey branched on me. I had 2 young kids but I did not hesitate to file for divorce.
I knew I would never want him back ever.
In hindsight my ex who cheated on me was very emotionally immature. 5 years, every single day she was my only priority. I lost myself in the process and the rest is history. One thing that has really helped move forward each day is not so much forgiveness but consciously doing my best to not hold resentment. She is human, she fucked me in the most painful way but I hope she is well. I think being the bigger person when someone betrays and hurts you is pivotal to growth and moving forward.
Womp womp
Sorry to hear that brother. I've made similar mistakes as you.
Mine left me after 7 years, took our dog and went to her mum. She started dating a guy after 3 weeks. Had to tell me that, because she thought it would make it "easier" to let her go...
I've made the mistake to reach out and chase her after a month of no contact.
In your case, don't take her back, never....
Glad forgiveness is the path forward for you. My view is that it's not necessarily pivotal nor even essential for everyone in order to move forward - my situation involved DV and sounds very different from yours. Unfortunately some of us have had our compassion and forgiveness used as weapons against us for so long, that what's pivotal to moving forward is to stop forgiving and see people for what they are. For me, once I process the pain of this, indifference is my goal. Take care
Just found your videos this morning Paz. Just tonic needed. Thanks for your straight up, no BS, logical appraoch. Very refreshing. Looking forward to new videos and going through the archives.
Thank you my dear friend! Your words means the world to me, I’m glad to be of service to you, please let me know me know if you have any questions or suggestions for further videos.
I got you 💪🏽
Thanks brother. This time is for sure all about healing, and shoring up the blindspot that allowed me to get into this mess. Objects in mirror are not as close as they appear.
Lets be real here, if they are already emotionally immature as an adult, if they have not, on their own, started intense therapy, they will NEVER become emotionally mature. EVER. YOU cant make them mature, nobody can. Only they can. But they wont.
Do yourself the respect of going through the greiving and healing process, and not only moving forward with your life, but YOU becoming even more emotionally mature. Let them lead their very unhappy life.
Spot on. They’re incapable of self reflection so always try to escape from themselves by getting someone to rescue them.
Yeah..unmet needs is a big point, we did both fail at this...there was sometimes a barrier between us, and we never knew how to deal with it...
9:41
Exactly!
Self respect comes before ANYTHING!!
yes!!
Thanks for being there for me
Always here for you you my friend, you’re not alone 🙏🏽🤍
Sad how many points described our relationship/breakup. ...
Cheating is whatever is breaking the agreed upon rules of the relationship. Banging with other people, for instance, is not cheating if that's agreed upon - polyam relationships for example.
i am actually in the stage, where I don't know where she monkey-branched or rebound into another person.
Said she met a person 2-3 weeks after break up, they are only getting to know each other... usually i would believe her, but before the breakup we were silent for two weaks and went out alone as a passive-aggressive action.
Told me: " what does it bother you? You don't even care for me and ask me where i am going?"
I believe she met him in this time, but didn't do anything and had him more as backup..
No in %99 of cases she or he do it during the relationship.
You mentioned that rebound relationship never work. Does monkey branching also never works or is it different?
Monkey-branching relationships usually don't last
@@megachristina12ify Thank you for the answer. I think in my ex's case it might work because luckily she found someone very close to her place and she found things she were looking for in a man. I don't wish her bad but leaving me this way just not fair to my side and I wanted so hard to fix everything and wanted another chance but no. She immediately started living with the new guy and threw me away.
yes correct but What if You are mostly at fault of why she/he mo key branched or cheated? like maybe youre overly jealous,needy,controlling,possesive, anger issues,emptionally abusive..? enough reason for him/her to cheat... and you want them back because you know you can work things out after you do all the work to change, etc.
No, your ex can break up beforehand. Even if your character is the reason there’s never a reason to cheat or monkeybranch
What is that rise of the Phoenix program you talk about?
Wants a snake always a snake
You perfectly described why my ex broke up with me. He told me that he wanted to feel butterflies in the stomac again. 🤦🏻♀️ ignorant. he will be at the same spot in one year with his new monkey branch gf.
Exactly my exes words..good luck developing worms
This is what she did to me 😢
This is fucking cheating …
Sorry to hear that my friend
I’m here for you !
Unfortunately I didnt give enough attention, support and future guarantee she was looking for in our relationship and I pushed her away sometimes. I didnt cheat or didnt talk with other girls. Then she monkey branched. When we sat for the last time flowers on my hand and begging her to give me another chance, she was cold and told me she was seeing another guy. That week they started to live together. I blame myself since then and month passed by, they are happy and I'm in excruciating pain, I keep blaming myself and cant move on. She was the greatest I had partner until now. I miss her deeply. My ex posted stories on social media which she never did with me. I don't know what to do, even now I'm ready to take her back.
I’m sorry to hear that my friend, sounds like you’re having a hard time letting her go… if you want to talk to me about it I can help you.
You can book an appointment with me in this link:
bit.ly/coachpazgoldman
@@PazGoldmanOfficial Thank you for the answer, I'm curious to hear that in your other video you told rebound relationships never work %100, does monkey branching the same or is there a chance that it works? Just knowing she is with someone else better than me happy and not even thinking about me, so difficult for me to accept.
@ferit7418 you’ve got to find a way to accept it My Brother and instead of being bitter about this become better work on yourself!
It doesn’t matter if her relationship will be successful or not what matters is are you going to be successful? or are you going to let this destroy you?!
I understand it. You’re going through hard times right now, but you can choose to your energy towards positive outcomes. Your choice brother, what’s it going to be?
@@PazGoldmanOfficial I watched some of your videos. So many good Info. Also watched your documentary, and Man, you said so many stuff and did so many things that I did throughout my breakup, crying, all the ups and downs, missing her, wanting her back, wanting to change things and many other things. It was like watching myself. Great content, appreciated, keep up the good work. I'm sure you will be a guide to many such as myself.
"Sayenara! Lehitraot! Shalom!" 😂
God help you if you're unfortunate enough to get sick! Monkey Branchers lack the emotional maturity to support you...mine was afraid to be honest with me but talked to all our friends about things that should have been communicated between us..... saw him behind me in a store and he left ( guess he couldn't face me). They know what they are doing.. they don't want to face the truth and be accountable...mice not real men
Same goes for women m-branchers
Love it❤❤❤
Thank you 🙏🏽🤍
Got much more on my channel and exclusive content on my course if your interested to learn more click this link ;)
pazgoldman.com/theriseofthephoenix
Another great video
I think I was monkey bramched. But Idk bc my ex is an expert without accountability..
#9 💔💔💔
Yeah that’s a tough one brother…
Is it still considered monkey branching if my ex leaves me for his own reasons but has still been talking to his female friend about our issues through the last several months… and then quickly after we split he starts seeing his friend and she moves in with him? He said she had nothing to do with the breakup or the reasons behind it.
No, it does not consider his monkey branching.
The reasons of him going with another woman after he’s been with you should be enough for you to move on and forget about him .
If you need help and guidance through your break up and healing journey, feel free to email me
paz@pazgoldman.com
@@PazGoldmanOfficial I don’t want him back- but she had a crush on him for years… never made a move because she was with someone else. Once they broke up, she quickly started going after my ex and I didn’t feel like it was my right to tell him who to be friends with or not. I knew for the years prior he saw her as a sister. I’m not sure when it changed.
@@Deanna1295 They both sound like creeps to do something like that - and I'm sorry but that is monkey branching, they may not have slept together but that's an emotional affair, and sounds like it was going on long term. My heart goes out to you - you deserve way, way better. Take care and I hope you heal through this quickly and find someone much better quality.
@@rebecca_stone the most hurtful part was how he ghosted right after this past new years, and for the 3 years we were together he treated me very well. Once he was done he was completely done. It’s been 6 months as of last week and I’m still struggling.
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Thank you for watching Lily! 🤍🤍🤍🙏🏽
@@PazGoldmanOfficial Thank you for sharing your wisdom and experience 🙏🏼 You’re helping me so much.
@lilywashere_ you so much for letting me know this Lily. It means a lot to me.!
Please feel free to ask me any questions or give me suggestions for future videos that can help you 🙏🏽
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Thank you for watching! 🙏🏽🤍
Please let me know if you have any questions or suggestions for future videos .
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Thank you for watching! 🙏🏽🤍
Please let me know if you have any questions or suggestions for future videos .
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