Step INTO your comfort zone... Not out!
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- Опубліковано 8 лют 2025
- Most would say "Step out of your comfort Zone" in order to grow and accomplish your goals and life ambitions. I don't think that Applies to people With ADHD! We live outside our comfort zone, masking and hiding our ADHD symptoms at work and socially. If this advice applied to everyone then I should be an expert at life right about now. I think people with ADHD need to step into our comfort zone in order to grow and accomplish our goals. This means we have to be comfortable with our ADHD and we have to stop trying to do things the way other people do them. Do what makes sense to you even if it looks silly or someone tells you that it's weird. It may look silly and weird, but the job or task is done right? Who cares how I got it done!!
"How can I teach my kids how to have a comfort zone" is one of the most amazing, parenting done right things I've ever heard. ❤️
You should 100% run this theory by Jessica at HowtoADHD! She routinely researches concepts related to ADHD to educate herself and others (she has ADHD too). And lately the direction of her channel has shifted away from ‘how to overcome your ADHD’ and leaned more toward ‘how to become comfortable with your ADHD’ and create a world more accommodating to Neurodiversity. I’ve watched her for a long time, only recently found you- And I love your videos too! I can’t believe the level of quality your videos have when you’re such a tiny channel!! I’ve tuned into every video you’ve made thus far, and will continue because I love your outlook and advice as a fellow ADHDer-
Just- I dunno man, maybe consider it! I know I absolutely LOVE the concepts here and will be implementing them from here on out!
I watch Jessica’s HowtoADHD channel as well. Honestly, after I was diagnosed a little less than two years ago, I wanted to do something for my kids to look back on. I want them to know that the mistakes that I may have made raising them may have been because I was trying to learn about my brain, while at the same time trying to teach them about theirs. That’s like learning to read while teaching them how to read. Watching a lot of Jessica’s channel gave me the courage to actually start mine. All that to say, I would love to run this theory by her. It may take me some time to gather the courage to do so, but I think I will.
Thank you so much for your encouraging words about my content. It really means a lot. I am so glad my unscientific theory made sense to you.
@@stevewithadhd Of course, I’m also so happy to hear that it’s a possibility! You and I are actually in a pretty similar boat regarding Jessica’s content. A hyper-fixated binge through her content just under 3 years ago is what got me thinking “hey, maybe I should look into this”. And so I did before finally obtaining a diagnosis. Ever since her videos/channel have been a bit of a safe space for me to just, help me continue learning about my brain.
I would also like to say that I endlessly appreciate the approach you’re taking with regards to raising your children/teaching them about their own brains as you learn about yours. I can only imagine how tough that is, but I can assure you that will go an endless number of miles for your children in the future. I know that I would have very much appreciated such guidance and opportunity earlier on.
At this point, I’m inclined to say that even if the way is unorthodox (like standing on your head to do the dishes), you’re doing things right. At the very least you’re headed in the right direction, and helping your kids do the same. Keep at it, and I’m excited for the next upload 👍🏽🤙🏽
@@stevewithadhdi commented elsewhere about 1M+ subscriber channels taking more of a team. How to ADHD was what I was thinking when I wrote that. Your level of quality is in the same spot.
@@stevewithadhd Did you ever get the courage to run it by Jessica?
I completely agree. I've actually lived my whole life in my comfort zone, but I have had other neuro-typical people complain about it because they had expectations of what they felt my life should be like, given my skills and talents. It was what led me to knowing I had ADHD in the first place.
Sadly, it has led me to trying to do things like neuro-typical people. Yeah, disaster class, haha. I've only recently realized that my life has been great living in my "comfort zone", which is daring myself to achieve things in my own way.
"Have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary" - Steve Jobs
It is very difficult to unlearn what you have learned most of your life. I still find myself trying to do things that don't work for me because my whole life I was taught that that's how other people do it thinking it was the "right" way to do it.
@@stevewithadhd Yeah, true. It takes time too.
Phone or whiteboard, for lists. Harder to lose.
Remembering to look, though, ir even see it right in front of yoiu, though? ..
I’ve been feeling guilty about “not stepping out of my comfort zone”. Watching your video made me realize I don’t even have one!
I NEVER GET OUT OF P-ROFESSIONALS stuff like I get from you - your stuff , I can visualize and even feel dopamine just envisioning - my should says to me"hey , this stuff would be fun- I think I could do this." ADHD people have killer strengths - here they are :1)We think out of the box- problem solving , inventing , entrapreneuring - leadership ( if we h ave a secretary - we are amazing .2. Always curious, always friendly , approachable. We are tenacious and determined - like a dog with a bone we don't quit in hyper focus.i am a teacher and started a school ONLY for ADHD. We use these strengths ( I miss these in regular students ) . and no one shows signs of a boredom of course. Your stuff. helps me a lot with my book and adds stuff I did not know. Thank you. Your attitude is so focused on growth and learning- for yourself. Because you have skin in the game- you are more passionate to seek out solutions and more practical . That is why I learn from you best.ADHD people have skills needed by CEO;s Inventors, world changers - I wish I could teach those skills to regular kids. it is boring for. me when I teach people who are missing those skills. show this to a teacher - guys. im in a hurry , not doing punctuati8on. ok? but use the ideas and enjoy.
This is reminding me of a concept discussed in video game design talks, where players NEED a safe zone or little hub area that allows space for ease and to reset themselves in. If a game is constantly intense throughout the entire duration, then it will cause the player to abruptly exit the game out of over stimulation. For me, my comfort zone requires no people in my apartment, because humans are generally loud obnoxious beings that disturb the peace, and interrupt my nice ruminating thoughts about some sort of historical/scientific/artistic/interesting topic. When I am granted a nice comfort zone, I am far more willing to engage into things, and even step out of my comfort zone. However, I think everyone benefits from this at different levels, especially introverts. For people like myself (inattentive ADHDers), comfort zones may come more as a constant necessity to function, and not put on weight out of stress.
I mean, i think your theory further illustrates that discomfort and comfort are kind of relative. Like, discomfort can become someone's normal if that's what they've mainly had available--so what would actually be comfortable for us is foreign and unfamiliar. I think this absolutely makes sense for people with ADHD and other neurodivergent and/or disabled folks. Our societies aren't made with us and our brains in mind a lot of the time. So of course we get used to what is uncomfortable, the coping mechanisms that exhaust us or don't serve us. I think the more crucial difference here is the sustainability of our coping mechanisms. Because when you're getting used to new coping mechanisms and tools, they are probably going to be uncomfortable not because they aren't healthy or sustainable, but because they are very unfamiliar and usually counterintuitive to what the world has taught us. Your concept of building that comfort zone, though, I think that's the key to making our learning, coping, productivity, etc. sustainable. It will become comfortable eventually, and especially if we build in curiosity and flexibility, our ability to learn new things and have our thinking challenged won't atrophy. I think that's usually the discomfort that most neurotypical strategies of "step out of your comfort zone" talk about. It's that discomfort of change and adaptation when we're confronted with new information, especially when it challenges our current knowledge and beliefs.
This has really gotten me thinking about how I really am skilled with that discomfort of adapting--how a lot of people who've faced constant adversity are. In connection to your building the comfort zone from inside out strategy: I think with the concept of sustainability in mind, we have so much potential to really thrive once we have a baseline of what works for us. Because we already have that skill of constantly learning and adapting. It's developing a sense for what's going to work for us long-term that really needs to be addressed.
Thanks for your feedback and thoughts on this! I am breaking down goal setting for others for where identifying habits and trying methods shouldn't bring so much anxiety! Its been a year into learning about personal development through books, video, and other content. At first I had different resources guiding me, and now see it be more effective when I focus on one at a time, reflect more on my existing skills and pace myself to find what works for me.
Your videos are quite good - excellent lighting and background music. I still cant believe that the algorithms are not picking this up.
Great work - keep producing will be waiting for more ideas - maybe more on specifics? How do you replace a to do list? I still havent found an answer to this nastiness.
I do plan on getting more into specifics soon. I'm still coming up with ways to deal with different aspects of ADHD. Keep your eye out thought. I am working on a video that falls inline with tackling a to-do list.
@@stevewithadhd Sounds great. looking forward to it.
I am new to this chanel but i can relate to whar you say more and any you tuber that talks about ahdh that i have listened to so far.
Thank you so much for letting me know this. It feels weird to say that I'm glad you can relate, because it's about ADHD. I"m sure you know what I mean by that. LOL
I’m very grateful that you started this channel! There aren’t a ton of easily understood resources out there for helping ADHD parents to raise ADHD kids! I’m always afraid I’ll do it wrong and not give them the tools they need to become functional adults, because I don’t feel that I am one! Lol keep up the great work! And thank you!
Build my comfort zone from the inside out. *Quiet, excited screaming and flailing
You, Steve, have made my day and opened my mind. Thanks!
Also as a person who grew up in a pretty rigid and yet unstructured environment... I find it so relieving to see a father questioning how he's been raising his kids and willing to consider and embrace that he's been working with ineffective tools--especially WHILE they're still young and growing, while you're raising them. Thank you for doing the work to do that. It means so much more than people realize, I think.
Yeah I absolutely agree to you rtheory from personal experience as an ADD person who just can't seem to get almost anything done. Lastly watching a notion database tutorial on youtube and trying to implement what was being said.. I just couldn't complete watcching couple of seconds and just making notes.. when I closed down my laptop, stood up and went of to sit comfortably on a sofa (destressing from the fact I couldn't take in the info a second ago, and thus not follow through on what was being said), telling myself I'm going to take a pauze watching a personally interesting video on youtube. But instead.. I somehow came with the idea to watch a piece of where I left from the notion video on my laptop- on the ipad without making any notes or trying to implement the steps.. just allowing myself to (well not really) mindlessly watch the vid... suddenly I felt I could actually focus a bit on the video and I was able to follow throug and therefore actually UNDERSTAND the steps and the content that were explained in the vide... And OMG what a sudden boost of Happiness I got (dopamine&serotine on steroids). So for me it was than only taking the (then unintended) decision to close down the laptop from the work I was supposed to do (since I was mentally blocked to do it) and open up my ipad, sitting in a relaxed/comfortable manner on my sofa (instead of behind a laptop on a chair and table)! So yeah.. absolutely. Make yourself Comfortable. It reduces the task initiation anxiety/stress and/or "mental blockage" (I assume anyone in with ADD or ADHD knows what I'm talking about)
Discovered your channel today and I’m living it, it’s soooo relatable for me!
dude, your content is really, really helpful
I think your theory holds water. I agree with it and don't stop making these helpful videos. Great things start with humble beginnings
You just synthetized a bunch of my thoughts... I can relate and more. Love this
Man, i need to make s video on my add. It is just like yours. It is overloaded with thoughts, music, scenes from movies, my ex.. the way I used to be at once. It is a battle in the mind. My memory is poor. My communication sucks. I don't like rejection.. I don't like people. I do like the outdoors but only when motivated..I constantly try to do better for myself my own way. Sometimes it is to much at one time. And, I shut down
Music make listen hard… but I pushed through and love your hypothesis!
Thank you so much for watching! I have received many comments about the volume of the background music in my videos. I am working on it. I just published another video yesterday. If you watch that video, please let me know if the music is distracting to you. Thank you so much for pushing through it. That means a lot.
I think the adage to step outside your comfort zone might mean, live with and embrace anxiety and manage it. If you are saying ADHD people have more anxiety, I certainly agree and pushing to the point of being overwhelmed is not managing it. Your anxiety vs. ADHD video is what let me materialize this for myself. Thanks.
That was one of the best pieces of advices I ever heard related to ADHD.
I kind of have beeing doing it intuitively in the last 3-4 years, and my confidence has being growing enourmously since.
Actually, you know guys know, somedays it's, somedays itsn't.
Today it wasn't, but your video put it back on track.
Tks Steve!
I’ve always thought outside the box …. Because I never had a box. Double edged sword for sure! But, I totally see your point about working from within the comfort zone. I’ve just realised I’ve been doing this myself whenever I’ve done something good. It’s always when I’m not in that zone that things go … a little wonky shall we say? :) Great videos!
Also, this is just my perspective, but, I like that you don't get into specifics. You focus on principles that can be applied more flexibly. I wish more channels were like this, because I struggle with applying specifics. I do really really well with principles, core ideas, and "vibes" as the kids say (lol, I'm 26, I know I'm young).
thank you for this! I am just finding out about ADHD and your account was recommended to me on youtube. you are legit saving my sanity after melting down thinking of everything I need to relearn about myself. your theory completely makes sense. great work and looking forward to more content from you :-)
Just found him as well glad I clicked his channel 😄
Yes, i am an engineer. I make ways to overcome my short coming because i am great at creating solutions. Engineering is a very organized and logical thinking career. I have to be creative to complete task that "normal" people do without issue...like remembering things
I thought about this a while, since I would consider myself a successful person with ADHD. At least I did a PhD in physics and work as a team lead for a high tech company and I have a family too. Most of this I achieved by pushing through with the ADHD hyperfocus & being generally ambitious. However, I would not even be able to tell, where my "comfort zone" was at my most ambitious times. I also don't think that I had such a thing. I definitely pushed past a healthy limit at some occasions, but that's probably just a sign of not having that comfort zone that can help keep you healthy.
My life is centered around my chaotic sleep schedule: a shifting circadian rhythm disorder that comes along with my adhd. Unfortunately I have not found any hacks for it in all my life and so… I do everything based on that. Yes my life is limited as a result but if I don’t get sleep, at whatever inconsistent time my body insists I sleep, I’m completely non functional.
Love the title! Watching now.
Thanks Steve Great vidéo! staying within our confort zone Is sometimes the best decision. It goes with the concept of acceptance and recognising what our capabilities and limits are. Does this make any sense? P.s. to do lists don’t work for me either. I use « post it’s » that i have on my walls, countertops, etc.
I find post-it notes useful, too, because I can put one, concrete task on one note and carry it to another room. It's an external visual reminder, literally in my hand, with no extra data or distracting clutter. And it's satisfying to toss it in the bin when done.
This makes perfect sense and I totally resonate with trying to get IN a comfort zone my whole life. So great that you articulated this perspective! THANKS
I just found you today and can't wait to watch the rest of your content! You are helping me make sense of my ADHD. I do have a question about how to deal with people who will not accept your process on how to get things done? My husband and my boss are very analytical and systematic they can absolutely not accept my sometimes unorthodox way of doing things. I have tried to explain that there is not one way of "doing it" or accomplishing something but they can wrap their head around not going about it in a more "efficient manner" or "the right way" it is extremely exhausting trying to defend the way my brain works and makes me shut down and not want to try completing it at all.
Great stuff @Steve
Makes sense.
So helpful
Oh. . I know
You make vision boards on canva for mobile phone and make them as screen background
What kind of strengths of our ADHD do you use to help mitigate the weaknesses?
😶😲🤯
My adhd theory is ìt is caused from family traumas. .100%