Making The Worst Tinder Profile Imaginable (and seeing if I can get dates)

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  • Опубліковано 6 лип 2024
  • Today I make a toxic Tinder profile by taking awful pictures, making the cringiest bio I can, and messaging people to try and set up dates in a weird semi-social experiment. Enjoy!
    Intro (00:00)
    Taking Pictures (00:33)
    Making The Profile (01:45)
    Flirting With My Matches (04:46)
    Outro (09:46)
    Songs Used (in order of appearance): “The Very Idea of Heaven” by World Peace - “Semi-Burnt Sugar” by Sugar Wounds - “Pale” by Stalker - “Scented Markers” by Mirror Dream - Please go check them out and support them!!
    This video is not sponsored btw, just wanted to be clear!
    (No copyright infringement intended. All rights belong to their respective owners. This video uses copyrighted material in a manner that does not require approval of the copyright holder. It is protected under fair use under copyright law. Copyright Disclaimer Under Section 107 of the Copyright Act 1976 Allowance is made for "fair use" for purposes such as criticism, commentary, reaction, critique, etc. and is transformative in nature. The purpose of this upload is for viewer enjoyment. Not for monetary gain. All credit for the images, songs, videos, and everything else used goes directly to the people who made/own it!)
  • Комедії

КОМЕНТАРІ • 138

  • @ricecake123
    @ricecake123 2 роки тому +580

    the worst part of idaho is idaho

  • @rivanianx
    @rivanianx Рік тому +118

    What I learned today: Tinder is easy if you're into men and disregard every red flag under the sun.

  • @dazaiosamu6467
    @dazaiosamu6467 Рік тому +478

    It’s so sad but also really hilarious that you got so many male matches. I really hope the gay men in Idaho are okay lol

    • @SmokesKwazukii
      @SmokesKwazukii Рік тому +40

      slim pickins i bet.

    • @user-pz4xe3sb6t
      @user-pz4xe3sb6t Рік тому +13

      Naw dude it's just cuz dudes tend to just right-swipe on everyone. It's not really a standards thing, it's just more efficient than taking the time and energy, y'know?

  • @jarredj4827
    @jarredj4827 2 роки тому +164

    I once made a female profile with only a Chad Kroger photo and a family guy meme and got over 99 likes in one day

  • @tessitvra
    @tessitvra 2 роки тому +111

    phil is a hero. ive seen so many people like phil on tinder
    i saw one guy with a pepe shirt and a ben shapiro quote in his bio, it was really fucking bad lmao

  • @pigeonbuttgaming
    @pigeonbuttgaming Рік тому +69

    Can you do one of these but write as a black metal elitist with pictures of you running around in the woods with corpse paint?

  • @mimzy7455
    @mimzy7455 2 роки тому +83

    "Most likely because he is a bridge"

  • @chickengasmachine
    @chickengasmachine 2 роки тому +97

    Swiping right as much as possible on any dating site puts you in a separate grouping (usually containing all the bots and weirdos you satirized with this profile)

  • @navajoguy8102
    @navajoguy8102 Рік тому +32

    "A Harley for my Joker", I actually said oh my god out loud at that, holy shit.

  • @rafger3
    @rafger3 2 роки тому +248

    With this new upload schedule I see you more frequently than most people see their dad. You’re family, my guy

    • @eulelier18
      @eulelier18 Рік тому +16

      so, a Family Guy?

    • @garmen-
      @garmen- Рік тому +7

      YOUR MY FAMILY GUY

  • @harlothex3326
    @harlothex3326 2 роки тому +123

    it's so weird seeing another idahoan be actually cool? i finally escaped last year, but just barely. now im in one of like three OR towns that don't have dispensaries

    • @crustbag
      @crustbag  2 роки тому +47

      Luckily I escaped just shortly after this video came out! Now I'm in Colorado where they are more dispensaries than schools LMAO

    • @harlothex3326
      @harlothex3326 2 роки тому +4

      @@crustbag happy to hear it, my guy!

    • @SmokesKwazukii
      @SmokesKwazukii Рік тому +5

      @@crustbag bring phil to denver tinder

  • @Yoshimi666
    @Yoshimi666 2 роки тому +167

    Bruh you became a totally different person with those tinder pics lmfaooo. Great video dawg love the content

  • @foxtears9428
    @foxtears9428 2 роки тому +46

    “Do you watch family guy?”
    “No”
    “Well I’m killing myself then”

  • @milliejennings4009
    @milliejennings4009 2 роки тому +67

    Why are these men so eager to get with Phil😭

    • @xangrycatmanx5104
      @xangrycatmanx5104 2 роки тому +14

      Idaho

    • @GordonSlamsay
      @GordonSlamsay 2 роки тому +42

      Idaho out here smashing the stereotype that gay/bi men are smart, wealthy, well adjusted and have great taste. very progressive, Idaho!

    • @beautyandtheoffbeats
      @beautyandtheoffbeats Рік тому +6

      Phil’s sexy

    • @SmokesKwazukii
      @SmokesKwazukii Рік тому +5

      @@beautyandtheoffbeats sadly he is. i think they were holding out hope that phil would drop the obvious bit after a couple messages lmao

  • @joeyk3134
    @joeyk3134 2 роки тому +53

    Just make a profile with one single sitting in a truck sunglasses picture and a bio that says "I hate kids, dogs, and entitled women"

    • @galactic-hamster7043
      @galactic-hamster7043 5 днів тому

      *cats, women haters love their dogs more than any other human being and almost as much as their trucks. They make cat hating their personality (while simultaneously abusing the fuck out of any and all dogs w they own with garbage old world training methods lol)

  • @messenger5205
    @messenger5205 2 роки тому +26

    bro made a really racist country boy account and called it phil (anselmo) 💀

  • @SmokesKwazukii
    @SmokesKwazukii Рік тому +47

    the profile is funny, if i looked at it for long enough i'd get it and swipe right. the pics are awesome. i think a lot of these folks were hoping you would just stop the act after a couple messages and act like a real person. especially the dudes like obviously. fr i think you were sorta missing that? or maybe they all just want a misogynistic white supremacist country boy, we will never know.

  • @GordonSlamsay
    @GordonSlamsay 2 роки тому +29

    people were probably matching Phil because if how funny the profile is, and not how attractive he is

    • @katiequeen7225
      @katiequeen7225 2 роки тому +7

      Nah some people just always swipe right

    • @SmokesKwazukii
      @SmokesKwazukii Рік тому +1

      the dudes he talked to seemed to be of that camp at least

  • @obscure_alternatives
    @obscure_alternatives 2 роки тому +14

    The five finger death punch logo in the pictures 😭😭 could not have been more accurate

  • @saintmonster5984
    @saintmonster5984 Рік тому +13

    I still find it funny that he just trolls tinder for no reason but to make fart jokes

  • @LuminusNox
    @LuminusNox 2 роки тому +15

    Man-on-man flirting is basically just farting

  • @boxface6485
    @boxface6485 2 роки тому +49

    every time i watch one of your videos makes my life 15% better, you deserve more views

    • @garmen-
      @garmen- Рік тому

      So your life should be about 425% better now, right

  • @graydhd8688
    @graydhd8688 2 роки тому +29

    This vid was cracking me up, didn't think I had seen you before till clicking on your channel. I saw your Incel or Metal lyrics vid recently and that was my introduction, thought that was some dude, and thought you were some other dude, but you were both actually the same dude.

  • @MysteriousPinkFlufff
    @MysteriousPinkFlufff 2 роки тому +10

    Idaho dating simulator

  • @wizardinawetsuit
    @wizardinawetsuit 2 роки тому +13

    Phil having the best conversations 😭

  • @gutbucket6184
    @gutbucket6184 Рік тому +9

    this was painful yet hilarious

  • @Sam-dm8vh
    @Sam-dm8vh Рік тому +5

    r.i.p phil you will be missed

  • @taddybear4244
    @taddybear4244 2 роки тому +7

    I'm not sure why UA-cam recommended your channel but I'm so fucking stoked that it did.

  • @williamwhite4237
    @williamwhite4237 2 роки тому +19

    Damn so being a red flag actually works?

    • @SmokesKwazukii
      @SmokesKwazukii Рік тому +5

      i think the absurd pictures made people curious

  • @alizamilorin
    @alizamilorin 2 роки тому +11

    I was not expecting another upload but I am so happy

  • @uglyaniimals
    @uglyaniimals 2 роки тому +9

    this was legit one of the funniest videos i've seen in a while, thanks for this

  • @joeylo3543
    @joeylo3543 2 роки тому +7

    Phil’s a beast.

  • @aidanmahoney9865
    @aidanmahoney9865 Рік тому +5

    Idaho is like Ohio’s evil twin

  • @Skonces
    @Skonces 6 місяців тому +1

    This was a fantastic watch, I nearly pissed myself laughing

  • @spookymon_
    @spookymon_ 2 роки тому +3

    Had a great time with this! 😆 Cheers dude, keep the vids coming!

  • @peptodismal5431
    @peptodismal5431 Рік тому +3

    "i've been stuck in the worst part of idaho" that is all of idaho

  • @user-xe6vx9nc3i
    @user-xe6vx9nc3i 2 роки тому +4

    it's good to see u upload again man ive missed u!!

  • @jean-luc3737
    @jean-luc3737 2 роки тому +10

    Dude I‘m so fucking drunk rn

  • @ShiverMeTimbers93
    @ShiverMeTimbers93 2 роки тому +8

    1:39 holy shit femboy

    • @katiequeen7225
      @katiequeen7225 2 роки тому +1

      Mesh tops dont make one a femboy, they justmake you hot

  • @michealdavisprince
    @michealdavisprince 2 роки тому +5

    Massive great kate weathermachine energy, loving it.

  • @randomnothingness6557
    @randomnothingness6557 6 місяців тому +1

    Ngl that fishnet photo of you goes hard

  • @mistressofstones
    @mistressofstones 2 роки тому +15

    You're a beautiful fellow, I have no idea how you made yourself look so awful hahaha XD

  • @james-si2sg
    @james-si2sg 2 роки тому +3

    2 uploads in a week 🤤 okay i see u mr. bag

  • @marcb.cardlab6750
    @marcb.cardlab6750 Рік тому

    Oh my God, you transformed into the perfect Johnny Manziel prototype!

  • @neonbeams5923
    @neonbeams5923 Рік тому +3

    Today I learned that the men in Idaho need to raise their standards bc holy fuck

  • @SlyHikari03
    @SlyHikari03 Рік тому

    That dunkey quote part was gold

  • @wargasmorgasm2197
    @wargasmorgasm2197 2 роки тому +3

    R.I.P Phil

  • @witherton8340
    @witherton8340 Рік тому

    That bio is filthy I love it.

  • @thebeaniepancake7731
    @thebeaniepancake7731 Рік тому

    Found this in my recommended, I do not regret clicking on this, unlike the people who swiped on the profile

  • @useless.b0nes
    @useless.b0nes 2 роки тому

    you amuse me very much thank you

  • @NECRO1369
    @NECRO1369 2 роки тому +7

    Lol this is a good. One. I live in Wy. Have been on tinder for more than a decade, and got the same thing when I played around with the sexual preference. Button. Majority of my likes became. Dudes even though I am blind. I haven’t. Gotten 1 good female match. On this app ever. I am just glad this pattern spreads out. To other rural states too lol.

  • @mach2223
    @mach2223 2 роки тому +1

    Respect the Xasthur shirt

  • @inalingthedead
    @inalingthedead 2 роки тому +1

    How long you been growing your hair for man?

  • @notme2221
    @notme2221 2 роки тому +1

    why did having a restraining order o. horse break me so much

  • @talionunnamedkys1145
    @talionunnamedkys1145 Рік тому

    Inspired to do the Austrian version of this thank you sir.

  • @Branchestopiss
    @Branchestopiss Рік тому +1

    Makes my tummy hurt 🔥😎

  • @slugs_and_bugz7646
    @slugs_and_bugz7646 2 роки тому +1

    Hey! What’s the 2nd band shirt you wear, in the video?!

    • @crustbag
      @crustbag  2 роки тому +1

      Portrayal Of Guilt! They're really cool!

  • @mauzer1769
    @mauzer1769 Рік тому +1

    what's that band with the sword?

  • @svdderdvze6070
    @svdderdvze6070 2 роки тому +2

    Bro are you still in Idaho!? I’m a massive metal head and live in northern Idaho!

  • @highlanderro
    @highlanderro Рік тому +3

    be rootin
    be tootin
    be fartin

  • @localfairy_1113
    @localfairy_1113 Рік тому

    Watching this at 12am

  • @m0rior
    @m0rior Рік тому

    Phil could be a new member of haunted mound 😭

  • @straight_edge_5139
    @straight_edge_5139 Рік тому

    Off topic but where did you get that nails flag my boy.

  • @in.der.welt.sein.
    @in.der.welt.sein. Рік тому

    Needs a Code Orange "Thinners of the Herd" logo.

  • @Matt-yz4dz
    @Matt-yz4dz 2 роки тому +2

    is that perhaps a xasthur shirt

  • @ry4n_q
    @ry4n_q Рік тому

    This video is so great, yet it hurts me so much to watch. Who could agree to Phil? People are real weirdos on dating apps, smh

  • @OTOSoundsandVisuals
    @OTOSoundsandVisuals Рік тому

    I fucking love you Xasthur shirt yo!

  • @SuperRedhawk13
    @SuperRedhawk13 2 роки тому +1

    You forget a bunch of other people swipe right on everyone too

  • @heavenly2k
    @heavenly2k Рік тому +3

    Idaho is real?

  • @squ1d.meta116
    @squ1d.meta116 Рік тому

    Wait you're also from Idaho? How can I escape?

  • @dylanchesworth3509
    @dylanchesworth3509 2 роки тому

    Portrayal of guilt shirt⁉️

  • @paulius3818
    @paulius3818 2 роки тому

    sick xasthur tee

  • @aleb8237
    @aleb8237 2 роки тому +3

    I want to buy that shirt (top 10 rules of sagittarius) and I'm not even a Sagittarius

  • @SeVeN-A7
    @SeVeN-A7 Рік тому +1

    Should have went with Keith or Toby for the name lol

  • @leonms3119
    @leonms3119 2 роки тому

    0:53 bro kind of looks like Paul dano LMAOO

  • @adrd208
    @adrd208 2 роки тому

    So you're in Burley right?

  • @scabby666
    @scabby666 2 роки тому +2

    💕🖤

  • @onefordespair
    @onefordespair Рік тому +1

    I live in Montana and it's not much better my man

  • @emanuelpracic4021
    @emanuelpracic4021 Рік тому

    The worst Tinder profile is apparently mine

  • @Daniea3
    @Daniea3 Рік тому +3

    I thought some women would get that you were mainly messing/Joking!

  • @juju_the_blue
    @juju_the_blue День тому

    Crust gives off Bi curious vibes I support!.

  • @willwalsh4371
    @willwalsh4371 Рік тому

    Here lies Phil. He never scored

  • @caseb.1347
    @caseb.1347 5 місяців тому +1

    The real tinder profile pictures give me he/they vibes

  • @Spl4tterPvnk4
    @Spl4tterPvnk4 5 місяців тому +2

    its okay bae i watch family guy ( this is a joke for legal purposes )

  • @ConKelly92
    @ConKelly92 Рік тому

    Ingrown is the best thing to come out of Idaho

  • @KanashiiNekoP
    @KanashiiNekoP 8 місяців тому

    Why would I actually swipe right…besides the unemployment

  • @dajzyy
    @dajzyy Рік тому

    do u watch family guy?

  • @basedmuscleman6539
    @basedmuscleman6539 2 роки тому +2

    googity

  • @ndSpaz
    @ndSpaz Рік тому +3

    Both confederate AND US flags? Pick a side already!

  • @sigurdsnek5644
    @sigurdsnek5644 2 роки тому +4

    when the

  • @guyanon9792
    @guyanon9792 Рік тому

    I miss Idaho lol

  • @lordfizzz
    @lordfizzz Рік тому

    Just a dude and his truqq

  • @brainglow_lightbright
    @brainglow_lightbright 2 роки тому +1

    That one… are you pretending you have chew in ur mouth dude

  • @samdal420
    @samdal420 Рік тому +1

    Dear god not the confederate flag 😭😰

  • @CizerKedi
    @CizerKedi Рік тому

    Dude ur really cute btw wanna date sometime?

  • @bennybyers1409
    @bennybyers1409 2 роки тому +7

    I think the funniest part of this is that he basically made the average female tinder profile but as a guy.

  • @russianweeb
    @russianweeb 2 роки тому

    f̷̩̜͚̤͇͔̿̋̓̐͜͝͝e̷̞͍̲̜̔̃́͝e̷̠̭͎̽̂̾̕d̷̛͈͓͉̮̦͔̼͈̳͔͙͊͌̌̊̔̏̊͂̔̚̚â̵̬̰͍̾̉ĺ̸̞͌̐͐̉̑̐̓͒̎̊̈͘͝g̸̛̩̥͌͋̌̊̑̌̈̓͝õ̴̡̯̥͔͓̙̪͓̫͓̞̞̣̜͓̅̀̑̉̒̋̇̄̐̋͝r̸̨̤̤̔̆̍͌̾̈́͆́̚͜į̶̨͓̗͚͚̳͉͕͚̝̪̳͍̲͌̈̊͗͛̎͌̌͒̏̒͋͘͝t̶̨̘͕̂̽̀̉͐̈́̎͌̌̿́̆̿h̴̡̥̺̤̳̘̳̜͈̝̤̱̾̐̽m̷͉͊̾̊̽̅́͋͋̍̂̋́̚̕͘

  • @TomTom.o.
    @TomTom.o. Рік тому

    Idaho udaho or wedaho? Fart.

  • @ChristianF15cher
    @ChristianF15cher Рік тому

    🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈!!!U R NoW GaY!!!🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈

  • @daysgoneby3527
    @daysgoneby3527 2 роки тому +4

    When only the top 2 to 5 percent of best looking guys get matches it doesn't really matter of you try or not. Most guys simply won't be able to get matches. Also males swipe everything sadly..

    • @katiequeen7225
      @katiequeen7225 2 роки тому +17

      You sounding like a real "nice guy"

    • @daysgoneby3527
      @daysgoneby3527 2 роки тому

      @@katiequeen7225 if you're actually female you're probably the kind of person who calls guys incel to try to basically discredit everything they say. I don't know what it is with you lot but it's like whenever we explain how guys have it particularly unattractive guys you don't even listen.byou ignore everything we say and only hear the part you can use to further your stupid agenda. It's like you're incapable of understanding. Fucking read what I said. look into how guys have it before you blame them and screw this stupid nice guy argument. I'm sick of that. The whole nice guys arnt nice crap, it's not about thinking you deserve anything for being good it's that everyone wants what we're bloody made for, people r biological purpose and programming and when you've been a relatively decent person all your life and can't get shit while actually crap and bad guys can you can get pissed off which is natural. You don't understand that going without can turn any decent person mad after years, it's not natural and it doesn't mean we are bad people. Stop blaming guys for being pissed off when we have to spend years alone and you don't have to. stop with that stupid "entitled" sht when you lot can throw up a photo of a toaster and still match with tonnes of at least average guys when most of us can't even match with any non fat people who are under 30 and arnt a transexual or something. You arnt in a position to judge. You couldn't handle being treated by men the way you treat us. Also what I said is fact all the matches go to the top 5 percent of men. Go make male profiles you'll soon see

    • @Asraeks
      @Asraeks 2 роки тому

      @@katiequeen7225 being nice has nothing to do with any of this. Its simply statistics. There are aproximately 3 men (or more) for 1 woman on tinder. Men are hella desperate, and women often use tinder as simply confidence boost. Remainder of women can be very picky considering the amount of option they got. So naturally they go for few top men, who effectively become pussy tycoons. And so there are only scraps left for the rest of men who also turn on each other for sex

    • @madamebkrt
      @madamebkrt Рік тому

      Hmmmmmm...