'What Does It Mean to be British?' with Olga Koch and Nish Kumar | Late Night Mash | Dave

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  • Опубліковано 30 вер 2024
  • THIS CONTENT INCLUDES STRONG LANGUAGE. Do you think you could pass the British citizenship test? Do you know every Sugababes line-up since 1998? Olga Koch and Nish Kumar discuss what it means to be British.
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КОМЕНТАРІ • 120

  • @cvde95
    @cvde95 2 роки тому +74

    When I had to the Life in the UK test one of the questions was legitimately "Which two of Henry VIII's wives were first cousins?"... it's literally like doing a crappy pub quiz except instead of a pint you win voting rights.

    • @markbrown7913
      @markbrown7913 2 роки тому +2

      Thomas Howard Duke or Norfolk's nieces Anne Boleyn & Catherine Howard.

    • @BillyBobJoeSnr
      @BillyBobJoeSnr 2 роки тому +1

      It sounds like it was written by some privately educated boomers who were taught the British empire days...

    • @2239jules
      @2239jules 2 роки тому +3

      Sounds to me like you are definitely a proper UK citizen, with that last comment 👍.

    • @maureenogorman8740
      @maureenogorman8740 2 роки тому

      Anne Boylen Catherine howard

    • @maureenogorman8740
      @maureenogorman8740 2 роки тому

      @@madisntit6547 smooth !!!!

  • @upendasana7857
    @upendasana7857 Рік тому +5

    Its definitely not normal British etiquette to introduce yourself to neighbours,in fact I'd say its the exact opposite,ignore neighbours at all cost and pretend you didn't even notice them whilst at the same time having a good old nosey when you think no one notices.
    That citizen test obviously has a very old fashioned view of Britain and obviously thinks we live in some 1950's ideal"of neighbours taking round potraosts or cakes to new neighbours or those they know are sick or ill or needy...not in 2000's Britian they don't,its dog eat dog out there and ognore neighbours at all cost just in case they need somehting..godforbid

  • @Arlosrep
    @Arlosrep 3 роки тому +132

    The highest GDP in Europe.... AND four world cups

    • @The482075
      @The482075 2 роки тому

      Don't make me cry. No please don't. I don't have enough tissues for that.

    • @googlereviewer438
      @googlereviewer438 2 роки тому +2

      Germany

    • @unexplainedaf7469
      @unexplainedaf7469 2 роки тому

      And started, then lost, 2 world wars. WTG you guys.

    • @Christian988.
      @Christian988. Рік тому

      Yes but at least we can do comedy and talk about our country's past with reverence.

    • @christiansebastianlauritse2404
      @christiansebastianlauritse2404 Рік тому +6

      @@Christian988. Sure, But that does require you to be VERY selectuve with the past ou choose to look at..
      All countries can. Germany could do that too, the just choose to be honest.

  • @casbot71
    @casbot71 3 роки тому +42

    In retrospect, Olga probably wishes she'd gone for Irish citizenship instead…

    • @brydon5721
      @brydon5721 2 роки тому +12

      I'd say at least 48% of the population wishes they could do that.

    • @highdefinitionstanleytm9614
      @highdefinitionstanleytm9614 2 роки тому +3

      Haha them salty lefty tears.

    • @casbot71
      @casbot71 2 роки тому +13

      @@highdefinitionstanleytm9614 ?? Mate, I'm Australian.
      I'm fascinated by Brexit, _like many Australians,_ because we can't believe how absolutely you've *stuffed up your Nation* and given away your desirable position as the gateway to Europe.
      My only tears are of laughter at your expense.

    • @highdefinitionstanleytm9614
      @highdefinitionstanleytm9614 2 роки тому +3

      @@casbot71 well obviously by your choice of media on UA-cam i doubt you are getting a full picture of the benefits that Brexit has brought or will bring in the future.

    • @mihohobaba
      @mihohobaba 2 роки тому +7

      @@highdefinitionstanleytm9614 So what are these benifits, then? Please enlighten us.

  • @kristenblount8422
    @kristenblount8422 3 роки тому +68

    If a new neighbor knocked on everyone's door to introduce themselves, I'm pretty sure we'd all be quite suspicious &/or terrified. Do they want something or are they just nuts? Definitely not typical British behavior.

    • @BillyBobJoeSnr
      @BillyBobJoeSnr 2 роки тому +1

      @Daniel Wood Maybe you're British, I'm American I've done that every time I've moved. I'm calling the British embassy in the morning to request my passport.

    • @VambeefcoHorzey
      @VambeefcoHorzey Рік тому +1

      That reaction says more about you, Kristen.

    • @squee599
      @squee599 Рік тому +1

      As Moss's mum says "An unopened door is a happy door!"

    • @baylinkdashyt
      @baylinkdashyt 3 місяці тому

      A point The MASH Report (before they broke it) addressed in one of their Him And Her field reports.

  • @gryphonberlin
    @gryphonberlin 3 роки тому +17

    The German Citizen test was very logical, basic rules and regulations mostly, the difficulty was the written language - for me at least - was sometimes hard to understand if the question was pro or con about the subject. over 100 questions you can go over online, and they choose 37 for you to answer. simples!! (not really..but I only got 3 wrong,and I knew that there were 4 or 5 that I was unsure of, so better than expected.)

  • @Aylin79
    @Aylin79 3 роки тому +34

    I agree, life in the UK test is very detailed and a big unfairness to foreigners which I attended in June 2021 . Two of my native colleagues did a mock test and they both failed and wondered how I went through it.

    • @bazzakrak
      @bazzakrak 3 роки тому +4

      Sounds like the one in Denmark, many many danes fail that one as well.

    • @Raztiana
      @Raztiana 2 роки тому +2

      @@bazzakrak, the average DF (Danish People's Party (for racists with little education, who don't realise, that their politicians would sell them as slaves if it would make them able to torture immigrants and refugees))voter fails, which I find very amusing.
      The questions are crazy and practically always irrelevant.

    • @mchparity
      @mchparity 2 роки тому +2

      I took it for my indefinite leave to remain. You just buy the book, read it, take the test then forget all of its contents in a week.

  • @markbrown7913
    @markbrown7913 2 роки тому +4

    Where's the Doo Dah? Two world wars and one world cup, doo dah, doo dah

  • @crookedsouls
    @crookedsouls 2 роки тому +3

    No warm Fosters till 11am? 8am in a Spoons! I was shocked too...

  • @mchparity
    @mchparity 2 роки тому +2

    Why the f do I know a pub opens at 11am?! I'm not alright.

  • @Health-zp2eh
    @Health-zp2eh 2 дні тому

    It's can be even worse throw test that could k my I can fill ya in on that one 🤦

  • @christophernicolson5086
    @christophernicolson5086 Рік тому +1

    There's some food for thought here about who we are and how the world sees is versus our own perceptions.

  • @quantumeseboy
    @quantumeseboy 2 роки тому +2

    Is she an oligarch's daughter?

    • @asetkeyzet
      @asetkeyzet 2 роки тому +1

      You bet! 😅
      His dad Alfred Koch was a pretty big politician in 90's Russia and for a little time was a key figure in NTV, big Russian channel. Interestingly, he even been a host in two episodes of the local "The Greed" quiz show. 😮

  • @crazyman8472
    @crazyman8472 2 роки тому +1

    You can keep your passport…for now. 😈

  • @mattnisenoff8428
    @mattnisenoff8428 3 роки тому +17

    Happy to have Nish and the gang back! Thanks Dave!

    • @MultiMeg101
      @MultiMeg101 3 роки тому

      Sorry mate probably yes along with all the people that produced it I silly me I was on about the content and humour

    • @mattnisenoff8428
      @mattnisenoff8428 3 роки тому +4

      @@MultiMeg101 I have no idea what you are on about. My comment was thanking the Dave Channel. What part of Norwich are you from?

  • @flyawaytodie
    @flyawaytodie 3 роки тому +34

    "Two World Wars and one World Cup"
    Germany: *laughs in 4 World Cups and economic domination of Europe*

  • @ajfrostx
    @ajfrostx 3 роки тому +1

    It's Moo-tea-ya, how dare you?

  • @exessex3522
    @exessex3522 3 роки тому +5

    2:09 I'm a Brit and have lived elsewhere for over half my life. I came back to London a few years back, went to see a musical and then tried to find a pub to have a drink in afterwards. I thought that all those restrictive opening hours were gone in the UK - but no. We couldn't find a pub open. We even asked in a few restaurants if we could just sit at a table and have a drink or two - no again. The latter is perfectly OK in licensed restaurants where I live.

    • @aecides3203
      @aecides3203 15 днів тому

      (I know, two years late, sorry)
      Your mistake was asking. Go into a restaurant, let them seat you at a table, let them bring you a menu, order your drinks and then either pick a side dish to share between you or if you want to make a game of it, see how long you can convince them you're still just talking over the menu. They can refuse you service due to licensing laws, but it's more likely to be because they don't want to occupy a table with people who aren't spending as much as they'd like despite being fully licensed. Whichever it is, while they can refuse to give you a table to have a drink at, they can't refuse to let you pay and leave before you order food after you've had your drink and, technically, if they're not licensed to serve you alcohol without food then they shouldn't have let you order your drinks before the meal (I have, weirdly, encountered a server who tried to demand I order a meal because I was 'breaking the law' if I had a drink without one and, I assure you, that's a "them problem"). I know it's really stupid that if the pubs are shut you have to trick a restaurant into letting you buy a drink, but if you roll with it it can actually be quite fun.
      Other option is to order something bottled, pay immediately, then pick up the bottle and walk out - they might not be licensed to sell alcohol for consumption off the premises, but they're also not licensed to physically stop you and as long as you're not stealing their glassware in the process there's nothing anyone can do about you walking off with the drink you purchased (someone should make a half hearted objection as you leave to cover their own butts legally, but nobody will actually care).

  • @CheeseFoodProduct
    @CheeseFoodProduct 3 роки тому +1

    Siobhan is god!

  • @paulreeder7029
    @paulreeder7029 Рік тому

    At least I got what time do pubs open! And I'm American! Would I fit in?

  • @Business.Marketing.Davidd
    @Business.Marketing.Davidd 3 роки тому

    What happened with the previous blonde girl?

  • @joost00555
    @joost00555 3 роки тому +2

    That is some excellent television.

  • @rdg71-o9t
    @rdg71-o9t Рік тому +1

    The Audience must be paid to laugh.

  • @IKnowNeonLights
    @IKnowNeonLights 2 роки тому +1

    Making a stand, in a one night stand, on bonfire night, shouting Guy Fawkes top one hundred list baby, weather from the top or below, front or back.

  • @brucemckay6615
    @brucemckay6615 3 роки тому

    Olga…. Ohhhh… Olga….

  • @damselfly8
    @damselfly8 3 роки тому +7

    We need the Dave channel in America. I need this.

  • @felix_christopher
    @felix_christopher 2 роки тому +1

    Got to say, the absurdity of the test kind of peaked my interest. Maybe it'd serve well for a drinking game?

  • @stuartwalters4784
    @stuartwalters4784 Рік тому +1

    This is funny?

  • @flightlesslord2688
    @flightlesslord2688 Рік тому +1

    Dangerous to do on a fella of Asian descent that, with this government he may get deported to x country where they 'look like him'

  • @zumazuma568
    @zumazuma568 Рік тому +1

    I love Mash. This is what "the daily show" in the US wishes it could be.

    • @extanegautham8950
      @extanegautham8950 8 місяців тому

      there is nothing even remotely clever in usa on tele..

  • @leerage9278
    @leerage9278 2 роки тому +5

    Thought we'd seen the back of this rubbish

  • @liamnotlast4571
    @liamnotlast4571 3 роки тому +5

    Olga is pretty!

    • @lilmoyinyang5812
      @lilmoyinyang5812 3 роки тому +2

      yeah pretty unfunny like the rest on the Mash Report

    • @liamnotlast4571
      @liamnotlast4571 3 роки тому +1

      @@lilmoyinyang5812 I like her comedic style.

  • @MultiMeg101
    @MultiMeg101 2 роки тому +1

    Ta ra Nish 😂

  • @OhNoNotFrank
    @OhNoNotFrank 2 роки тому

    Brilliant content, but unfortunately some of your vids are not available for viewers outside the UK.
    Any way to fix that for future vids? Thanks again for great entertainment!

  • @jo18533
    @jo18533 2 роки тому +2

    It's all about genetics.

  • @emiliaweber3353
    @emiliaweber3353 2 роки тому +2

    Congrats on your British citizenship, Olga
    Nice American accent :)

  • @jimspencer363
    @jimspencer363 3 роки тому +15

    Humour, of course is subjective, but I find Nish to be one of the unfunniest comedians on tv.

    • @Chris-im3ys
      @Chris-im3ys 3 роки тому +3

      You have a tv?

    • @ArminGrewe
      @ArminGrewe 3 роки тому +7

      why do you watch him then? Is your remote broken?

    • @jimspencer363
      @jimspencer363 3 роки тому +7

      @@ArminGrewe To annoy myself. Seriously, if he's on a show like QI or 8 out of 10 Cats, then I have to suffer his "humour" because I want to see the programme.

    • @lizastarpeter4295
      @lizastarpeter4295 2 роки тому

      So make some friends. That way you won't be so pathetic and lonely that you spend your nights watching videos for the sole purpose of triggering yourself.

    • @jimspencer363
      @jimspencer363 2 роки тому +3

      @@lizastarpeter4295 See what I mean about humour being subjective?

  • @gerryburntwood9617
    @gerryburntwood9617 2 роки тому

    At least in Australia you get to know your neighbours!

  • @iamthesolitarymaninblack
    @iamthesolitarymaninblack 2 роки тому +3

    The Gammons in the comments can't take a joke.

  • @user-fx3yf3vu8n
    @user-fx3yf3vu8n 8 місяців тому

    Neither of these two are British

  • @duncefunce1513
    @duncefunce1513 2 роки тому

    British passport

  • @robertallen591
    @robertallen591 2 роки тому

    british and english are very differant

  • @carlburrows9831
    @carlburrows9831 2 роки тому +2

    About as funny as stage IV Cancer 🤔🤮

  • @TheAlkebulanTrust
    @TheAlkebulanTrust 3 роки тому +3

    Colonialism and now neo-colonialism. 🙃

  • @YevOnegin
    @YevOnegin 2 роки тому +9

    Remember when British comedy was funny?
    And British?

  • @jamesblonde2271
    @jamesblonde2271 3 роки тому +5

    This is funny?

    • @revolver_84
      @revolver_84 3 роки тому +4

      Im wondering the same question.
      Racist, yes obviously. But funny! Can someone hold up a card or something when a joke is said please

  • @Ruzhyn_Ukraine
    @Ruzhyn_Ukraine 2 роки тому +1

    Do any Americans feel she has an American accent? Her accent is obviously Russian

    • @belg4mit
      @belg4mit 2 роки тому +2

      No, as a Californian I'd say she definitely has a neutral American accent, not a Russian one.

    • @zumazuma568
      @zumazuma568 Рік тому +2

      What's "obvious" is that she doesn't have any noticeable Russian accent, my dude

  • @Mubashir_AK
    @Mubashir_AK 3 роки тому +4

    I liked the original Mash Report a little, and I like both the people in this piece, but somehow, this just wasn't that funny.

  • @krayon_eater
    @krayon_eater 2 роки тому +7

    To be British means to be of Anglo-Celtic descent that one can trace back to the pre-modern area of the 20th Century. Ergo, Kuma isn't British. I hope that helps.

    • @alamunez
      @alamunez Рік тому +1

      That’s the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard

    • @keithsquawk
      @keithsquawk 8 місяців тому +2

      Though niether the Angles or Celts were from the island, the were invaders
      Just like every bunch that settled here.
      There are no 'natural' brits.
      I hope that helps

  • @futtatinni1
    @futtatinni1 3 роки тому +1

    Can you please do “What it means to be American” next? We could really use it.

  • @JustIT69
    @JustIT69 3 роки тому +1

    Who the …k are the sugar babes?

  • @drewcampbell8555
    @drewcampbell8555 3 роки тому +1

    Dear Olga - Don't lock your knees when standing. Causes problems in later life. Otherwise, well done.

  • @MultiMeg101
    @MultiMeg101 3 роки тому +4

    The only thing British and funny is the canned laughter

    • @annother3350
      @annother3350 3 роки тому +5

      No canned laughter in britain

    • @Richard_Jones
      @Richard_Jones 3 роки тому +3

      @@annother3350 To give Mark his due, laughter is so foreign to us in Britain that it probably does sound fake to him.

    • @Cleeboos
      @Cleeboos 2 роки тому +4

      @@Richard_Jones to be fair if nish kumar was your favourite comedian laughter would be foreign to you

  • @tigrecito48
    @tigrecito48 2 роки тому +3

    Late night Mash is only slightly funnier than 9/11