Should you tell a man you’re interested?
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- Опубліковано 3 лип 2024
- Thank you for watching! My videos focus on life, love, and business. I believe in living a balanced and full life. I answer questions from my viewers in the “Talks with Tony” series. Then on Fridays, I speak to the men in the “Man 2 Man” series. On Saturdays, I focus on business and entrepreneurial lessons in the “Small Business Saturdays” series. Then on Sundays, you can catch a motivational message in the “Sunday Sermon” series.
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Hello! It’s the man that has to find the woman and express interest. Women you are the prize. Never present yourself as thirsty for a man.
Amen💯
Amen !🙏🏽
AMEN! SO TRULY RIGHT! YES INDEED! ENOUGH! THAT'S IT! JULY2021
"Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing, and obtaineth favour of the Lord." --Proverbs 18:22
"Neither was the man created for the woman; but the woman for the man." --1 Corinthians 11:9
Simple
Ladies get your bag, be cute when you step out, & just smile. Let your King approach you. Happy Monday Blessed Tribe! 🥰❤
Happy Monday! Yeah they will come to you. I was pumping gas and got hollered at lol I had on sweat pants and a hat 😬 lol 😂
Just get out the house ladies!
@@ebonyflowers7599 hey Ebony! 🤗 clothes don't turn off beauty! Keep shining Queen!
Amen 🙌🏾☺️
❤❤
@@kamrynetia5835 he coming Queen!
Too many women mistake random acts of kindness from men for affection.
Personally I have never ,will never tell any man I am interested in him.
We as women need to STOP wearing our heart on our sleeves.
LET THEM WORK for you.
Hunt you.
In the meantime...DO YOU!!!
PERIODT
Sadly women don't let men do the work,they hand it to them on a platter of gold .it never ends well
I suspect that some men will do these supposed random acts to explore, hookup, and or use different women.
You are just scared of getting rejected lmao
Dating is like slow dancing--someone has to lead.
Cute analogy
Good word
that's right, someone has to take the initiative.
I will not approach a man but I smile, if that don't work, he ain't into me, simple!
Period!!
Smart!
I'm a guy. On behalf of most men. That smile and eye contact dont mean nothing to us. We think it's just you being nice. You have to give more signs than just that because most men are not body language experts like women and tend to be oblivious to such "signs"
@@leosolis5846 I have heard guys say this, but what other signs, without being the initiator? As a woman, I'm thinking that a smile and eye contact let's the man know a woman is approachable, at least to initiate a conversation.
@@tomekawatkins9098 tell them they are handsome or let then know what you like about them. Then they will know
“That’s what you have to realize as a women dealing with a man, you cant give too much too soon.” TG
Tony is right. I told a man once that I had feelings for him, and he used those feelings to his advantage to get what he wanted from me. I won't make that mistake ever again.
HE who finds a wife finds a treasure, and HE receives favor from the LORD.
They don't even want to look for the woman anymore. Men are getting lazy, they want a wife to drop from the sky 🙄
Thats Bible....Facts
So True 💕
To protect my confidence I don’t go up to men . I live in Houston and babyyyy these men do not have a problem embarrassing you with rejection or after the fact will act so busy you would think they got sworn in to be president of the United States 😂 .
I do smile , make myself available , will walk pass , ask a question (maybeee) , make eye contact etc but I won’t ask a guy for his number.
Allie lol 😂 girl u ain’t lying about the so called “busy “ part men kill me with that shit 🙄 it’s so childish and played out
I'm in Houston too and Bay- Behhh these men so raggedy 🤦🏿♀️😫 I'm with you on the level of attraction to a man I show.....all he gone get is 😊
Many years ago, I was out and remember seeing a man being approached by a woman. She was pretty and dressed nice. She started hitting on him and he was like no, Im taken. She kept trying to flirt and he put his hand up to eye level and pointed to his ring and said No. Im married. Very happily married! And she walked off. I will never forget that!!
Good for the man and shame on the wo man.
Wow Amazing! God bless him
Wow! Yup I too understand
Wow
She was too thirsty
Don't tell him nothing show him after he tells you.
I approach a guy in high school and deeply regret it. I will never approach another man in my life again lol.
Same
Same here.
Girl I did it in college. Twice. You'd think I would've learned my lesson the first time, but no. I will never disgrace myself on this earth in this lifetime like that AGAIN.
You probally only regret it because he didnt want to be with you lol
Only men who didn’t have an emotionally sophisticated dad want to be pursued. Those same men were generally raised by women and are emulating feminine energy. So rightfully so...they enjoy being pursued by women who lead with masculine energy. So please KNOW....that whoever leads....will have to continue to lead throughout the course of the relationship.
This is so true and I'm in a relationship like this now 😬 !
@@bam89081, I hope you’re able to see the light.
You ain’t never lied.
@@shortyduwop9172, thank you. If more women stopped giving these men attention and their cookie....they would learn how to treat them. We get what we require.
WOW, I never heard it in this perspective. very well said.
you have an AWESOME summer
Whew. Bay-bayyy... I worked out at a club for months. Saw a man that was handsome and working hard to get himself right. We always made eye contact, and he'd wink at me. Thankfully, I had grown to not approach and took it as it was, friendly acknowledgement. If he wanted me, he would step to me. Shoot. I was proud of myself for standing back. Locks don't chase keys. Diamonds don't scream, buy/pick me.
Love it
I like that, “locks don’t chase keys”
@@shortyduwop9172 i like that too
I'm 52yrs old & old school! I couldn't approach a man & tell him that I'm interested or ask for his number, etc. I want him to approach me! "A man that findeth a wife findeth a good thing!" I love this bible verse. If he's interested he'll approach me, if not, maybe he wasn't someone I need to date anyway!
Here here....Im 51 n would never.....never have in my life....men are hunters I am NOT !!! 😂
@@beefaye6861 You betta preach!🙌👏😂😂
Absolutely
Amen! I’m 54. I know!
I made this mistake once. Never again. He abused him so badly but hey it was a lesson learned.
Unfortunately, a lot of men these days are expecting the woman to approach them, because so many women do.
So true...so what do we do?
True. but still don’t directly approach them they have be spoiled by non rules women. Men know if they want you.and the ones that let you Chase thenm have a lot of female energy.
It is not only because many women do, it is also because of all the red pill content out there that teaches men (and not only men, women also, they have content geared towards women as well) they are the price, to let the woman initiate the "where we stand" relationship, moment when they impose on them whatever they can ..
Tony you are out here saving lives. You don't know how much these teachings mean to me. 👏🏽🙏🏽
Yep, never shoot your shot ladies! Even if things go well and you're someone who's waiting till marriage, how can you pursue a man (knowing what most men want) to then flip the script and be like I'm waiting till marriage 🥴 You can't go up to a man, say I'm interested but I'm not giving it up. Dude will look at you like you're crazy and think why should I even waste my time with you then? The guy that's actually going to wait has to want you enough to deny his urges and court you properly - and that includes making the first move. But that's just my two cents.
👍🏾👍🏾👍🏾
Tony. I recently got so lonely that I told 3 men who I knew that I was interested in them. None of them called me. I felt terribly rejected. What a disaster. It was a bad mistake that made me so 😥 sad. I'm moving on and. Not making that mistake again.
Sorry that happened to you but right let it be a lesson learned and let the next man show you he is interested in you or approach you first
Aww! Don't be sad dear! May God bless u!! Be safe and happy!❤
It’s cool, the pandemic had us all out here making the wrong selections .
Tony is so right. When it comes to a man you can't give to much to soon. I did with my husband and it cost me. I taught him that he didn't have to work for me. I taught him that I’d do all the work. He was also 18 years older then me, could’ve hold down a job & mentally unstable just to name a few things. I didn’t know any better, but people who use you don’t care. Now I use my UA-cam channel to help other women. Protect yourself ladies.
I agree. So very true.
This Mexican actress Maria Felix said that you need to be discipline even in love.
Ooh good quote thank you.
I started dating a man that I met while traveling home last week and I am practicing my best to be disciplined and focused while maintaining feminine and friendly. Date 3 tomorrow yay.
For me is a bit different I've seen men stare at me and are afraid to approach me, and if they finally work up the courage to talk to me they would later tell me I looked too pretty like I would only date men with muscles 😆 I'm still not making the first move though just spark a conversation to show I'm friendly and go about my business
I have poured my heart out to men I dated or was in a relationship with. and was still able to walk away.. In my experience, men have gotten TOO comfortable/ complacent too soon. I didn’t like that.Tony you are right.. when we show all our cards, they try to take advantage.
My ex got complacent. He took my kindness for weakness. I gave and gave. He thought it would always be that way. When you’re starved for love and attention, and you have a partner/mate, eventuality self preservation kicks in. You either leave, or stay and die inside. I had to leave.
🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽
stayed for 38 years....im good now and so are my 3 grown children
@@mmommo-hx4dx WOW, glad you found peace.
Thank you. To God be the glory.
❤I chose to live inside and out as well!
Goddesses, I think where we tend to fall short is acting out of desperation and getting too excited by overreacting to a man’s behavior. Outside of being a woman, keeping yourself put together and staying in your femininity, there’s not a whole lot of effort we have to put forth is getting the attention of a man. We have to be ok with a man not seeming to notice us or make a move and understand that’s just not our husband.
YES YES YES!!!
Man you are preaching today Mr. Gaskins. That used to be me I admit. Just like you said, when you shoot your shot as a woman it causes role reversal that spreads to every aspect of your relationship including the bedroom and wallet.
What did we do to deserve all this free game? 🙏🏽
God is smiling on us, that's what
No foreal, I needed to hear this. Caught myself almost slipping 😂🤦🏾♀️.
Right!!
I’ve known men who have completely flipped out when you catch on to their game of thinking they’re the prize. I don’t chase after men and it’s sad that they go to disrespecting you and blowing you off when you’re not trying to give them the same energy they’re used to.
Yep. This is why I quit dating. They're mostly Narcissistic. Toxic assholes.
Yeah one did that to me too. And I now understand that he was a narcissist.
I needed this video last week 🤣 he told me he was single and NOT looking... Didn't even compliment me back 😭😭 I was so embarrassed... I'm mortified but... LESSON LEARNED!!
Right never approach a man. That should be a natural thing for a woman to know. It’s kinda abnormal for a woman to approach a man.
@@rickytanner3 in today's society its hard to gauge. Especially in the "me too" Era. It's difficult to know the "roles" when they've become so convoluted
@@sweettee1257 it may be difficult but till this day, the roles still apply. It’s a natural nature that men and women have within themselves. Like us me are natural hunters. It’s abnormal once you get away from what’s natural and of God.
@@rickytanner3 I've learned my lesson. Thanks for your insight
Sorry this happened to you. Basically the same thing happened to me 4 times last month. I've learned my lesson. No more telling any man that I'm interested.
Tony you're a BOSS on giving game! I can't help but wait.
I agree. Don't put yourself out there first. Also, watch him to see if he is worthy.
Which is the main reason why I take baby steps because sit back listen and observe. If you sit back long enough instead of rushing you will see and please open your ears and hear. I did recently and saw what I DIDN'T want real quick. He got too comfortable too quick. That let me knew if I had moved forward how sorry he would be in the relationship. Bottom line allow the men to make the moves and lead.
Yass and to add to that, give him the energy he gives u. If he’s putting effort, do the same. If he’s not, do the same.
Yep. Grammar, etiquette, hygiene are soooo important. Funky breath is a definite deal breaker.
Right on time.
Ain’t he always!!!! Thank you Mr Tony!! I so trust your word!
Same here!!! Spot on.
So true I didn’t realize that I was selling myself short for chasing for a man. I guess that I’m a little bold lol 🤦🏾♀️😩
Right never approach a man. That should be a natural thing for a woman to know. It’s kinda abnormal for a woman to approach a man
Tammy me too girl me too lol 😂 that’s y im like y’all got it with all these hints y’all be throwing talkin bout smile and make eye contact … who the hell finna do all that… if u gone reject me then u gone reject me regardless 🤷🏾♀️ I’m not doing all that. If I find a man attractive and he don’t say nothing to me or approach WITHOUT all the bs hints then o well guess we won’t be talking. Im very direct and straight forward and bold so I just feel like if we can’t go all the way and give this a shot then move the hell around so the next man come along but I’m not gonna approach you . My pride too big for that
Man I love how you always saying we ought to protect ourselves....its amazing how you look out for women. God bless you and your family. Safe travels to Jamaica🙏🏾💃🏾
When women pour out their heart to their man on social media I know right then and there she’s a sitting duck!
What you mean by that
@@chickwitthagoodies I don’t even know what that means but it’s still hilarious.
Right, and it’s cringey especially when he’s just a boyfriend. And usually he isn’t moving towards engagement quick enough. And you never see the same outpouring from the men. I be embarrassed for them!
Lol 😂 that’s y I have NEVER followed or friend requested any man/lover I have been involved with nor have I ever or do I ever change my relationship status. I don’t post pics or statuses. I have to agree with cardi B when she said if it ain’t no ring on my finger you ain’t going on my gram 🤣🤣🤣🤷🏾♀️. I had one man that posted me and wrote a nice lil caption but honestly I didn’t return the same energy because I didn’t feel the same way nor did I trust him. I just half asses commented under the post 🤷🏾♀️ he turned out to be a narc anyway
Do you mean always posting their man every single day and things the woman buys them?
Yup, I listen to you! I been dating for a while now, he still haven’t found me yet but I’m keeping my legs Closed, a lot less heartache & men be gone quick! 🤷🏽♀️Thank you, enjoy your vacation...
"Over there in such n such women propose to men " "ppl ain't even got running water" 😂😂😂😂😂😭😭😭😭 too dead !!! TG
He's so crazy 😂
Thank you, thank you, thank you Tony! People around here telling women they should approach a man. They are talking about he may not know you like him, he may be shy, he may think you are too much, etc. If a man sees you and if he wants to get to know you he will approach you pure and simple. If he does not choose you, it will not go well for you, period. Thank you Tony for bringing these timely messages.
Recently, I saw a young lady on a UA-camr’s live video chat speaking about current issues. After the video chat, she super chatted the UA-camr telling him, she’s only a flight away. Also, she told the chat that she DM’ed him as well. I immediately had second hand embarrassment. Guess what, he basically told her he doesn’t play where he works…he curved her. See, she was participating in the, “shoot your shot” culture and it backfired in front of his whole chat.
Tony, I love me some you baby, listen to me you tell Sheree there is a great grandmother in Texas that love her husband, and the reason being is because you are 💯. I'm telling you!!! YOU shoot straight from the hip, and that is something that I absolutely love. God is good to us honey because he gave us you. Baby you crack me up with those mockings. I laugh so hard at you. I'm telling you, because you are truthful, you tell the truth, and you tell it just like it need to be told I love it. KEEP IT COMING!!!
Tony I’m always listening to an old video , then you pop up with a new video 🙌🏾🙌🏾
Appreciate ya.
I can say from experience that the correct answer to this question is a resounding "NO"!! If you are the first one to make the move, you will get hurt. I thought I could but I ended up with the following responses: (1) "I don't see you in 'that way'. You're like a sister/friend to me. Let's just be friends." (2) "I just got out of a relationship and I'm not ready." (3) he doesn't say anything at all and eventually employs the fade-out or outright just ghosts. It NEVER works when you outright express your interest in a guy if he doesn't first express interest in you. If he is worth it, he will move heaven and earth just to talk to you. Don't settle for anything less ... you're worth it!!
this is so true. I learned this the hard way, never again
I told a guy I had a crush on him.We have been talking for three years nothing sexual,I've been 🏃♀️from him. He builds me motivates me,his words of affirmation ,his advice makes me to complete tasks from different perspectives. He's a divorcee and I come from a single world and he makes it known that he wants to date me with a purpose. We are both are in our 40's and our kids are grown. The only thing holding me back is that we are coworkers and it's a male dominated profession. I don't feel I should shit where I eat!
Me after reading the title: NOPE
Me after watching the video: NOPE
Coach Tony, I pray for God's safe travel and protection to be with you and your family. Be blessed!
Thank you Tony. Us women, we have the most to lose so we need to guard ourselves. We need to understand our worth. God bless you . Enjoy Jamaica
I will never ever approach a man first!!
In certain situations I have a lot of pride and it's not toxic pride. I never told a man that I was interested and even if a man tells me he's interested and shows it it'll take me some time to express that. It's important that I don't have a wall up but I am guarded when it comes to my peace and my heart.
Perfect timing, thank you!
Takeaways:
❤️Save yourself rejection and embarrassment by stopping such masculine behavior and keeping your guard/God’s natural order for HIM to do the initiating.
💛Rather than tell a man you’re interested, *show* a man you’re interested by being *inviting!*
💙Show him just enough respect and attention so to not come on too desperate/needy/thirsty but also so he understands he has a green light to be the man to pursue, propose, provide, protect.
🤍Regardless of y’all’s “love language,” wait for him to *say* the biggest “words of affirmation”- I love you.
Who got time for all these “show but not too much” hints. Just don’t approach him. No matter how attractive he is or “interested “ you are. If he don’t come up to you then o we’ll guess we won’t talk but I don’t have time for all these rules and show but don’t do this and that and throwing hints. Im too direct and straight forward for that so while I won’t approach a man I’ll admire from afar but I’m not doing all that 🙄
Absolutely right! If I respond with a smile or you asked me if I'm interested you will know immediately.
If you're gonna give me 80, give me 80 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Strong believer of not expressing my interest until a man comes forward due to past lessons of doing so🙌
Most men want you to due to not wanting to get played.. meanwhile that shows lack of faith and insecurities in self
I'm not chasing no man
Thanks
That's right!!! Be BLESSED Tony.
LOL Tony said enough!! “Oh over in such and such women propose to men!” Had me rolling!
Thank you Tony for always dropping gems
Thank you for telling the truth.
Very helpful i have asked male friends this question and their answers were “i wish women approached first more often” or “i dont see a problem with a woman approaching first”
This is where it gets confusing yet no one can answer this question
Yesh I have a guy friend who likes to get approached by women.
Men will always say this because they want to manipulate women you can’t take them seriously. A man will approach a woman he really wants period.
It could be that these guys get rejected a lot when they approach women. And they want to feel "safe".
Thank you Tony ...have an enjoyable time
Awesome!!! Brilliant!!! Thank you Tony! You guys have a great break! God Bless you all!!! Enjoy.
Happy Monday Bro Tony, am here at work listening.
Have a blessed and safe trip Tony!
Thanks Tony for this lesson on" keeping my cards close to my vest". Be Blessed💚
I agree with you, Tony.
Thank for your consistency!! You are always spot on with your timing!
I am much wiser now. I was so naive in my younger years, meaning, I showered my man with love. He showered me with gifts attention,, time, love (well, I thought it was genuine love-LOL!) Made me feel like the only woman in the world. That was until he got me! Needless to say, he tried to drag me. I had the strength to stand up for myself and leave him. for good. Never looked back. It was the best lesson ever. I saw him recently, after 17 years. He has HIT the wall! No, he look like somebody beat him with a bag full of nickels!😄😄😄😄😄😄😄😄
NOTE: I do not approach men periodyot!!!!!😄😄😄
Peace and Blessings
Not the “periodyyyottt”😂😭
Thanks Tony, y'all be safe and enjoy your trip💪💯
Present!🌻 Ready for knowledge!
Thank you so much for this info Tony. This info is helping me.
I need this video!
Have a great vacation with the Family Tony 🥰💯
So true !
Thank you for the breakdown, I have been very guilty of pursuing men in the past. Undoing past conditioning and behaviors that did not serve me.
Thank you for this message…. I appreciate you…God Bless you 🙏🏾
Great topic!
Hey hey hey...always makes me happy to her this because I know some new knowledge is here. Hey hey hey, I'm happy to be here. Be blessed.
Yes, after he says and shows it
Your truth and wisdom with the comedy is Everything!!!!!😀😀 Thank you Tony!
Thank Tony for these words of wisdom! This is really a blessing to me and I’m quite sure to all of the women like me who need these words of wisdom! I know this is teaching me Tony because I am learning to be a better woman through your messages you give!
This is real!!!👏🏾💯
I'm not the mushy sort so I know where you're wife is coming from. My current bae tho has brought out that side of me (I lowkey hate it) He is the first guy that I have told that I love him... 😳
THANK YOU SO MUCH 😊.
From my experience is 100%true. I never repeat the same mistake again😀
Great stuff 👌🏾
Cher, Amen , Sister !!!!
I really appreciate when you talk about your wife. I feel like I can really relate to her and that’s super encouraging.
Right on time exactly because I have been grappling with this question for about a week now
Thanks!
Be bless.
Tony 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾‼️ keep speaking the truth! Some people about to be mad , but experience will be their best teacher 🤭
Great Video!!!
I promise you I watch you all the time and have never written a comment but today's message has literally been what I know to be true in my heart. I've always stood by this and even tell this to my friends but if I am to be 100% at times I started to doubt this process. Thank you so much for reconfirming what I already know. I am a leader in my church and teach the singles ministry and will continue to stand on this principle until God brings my King into my life. Bless you sir 🙏 🙌
Bro Tony enjoy your time with your family in Jamaica , I pray for safe travels going and coming back.🙏❤️🕊️🏖️🍍✈️
More tough love Tony, it’s making a lot of noise for some but it’s good!!
This is the most perfect physiological explanation for women that do not understand why you shouldn’t chase and initiate with men and over give.
Listening.
Yes yes help us Mr. Gaskin
I know that’s what he did to me but he will NEVER do that again period . Door locked and closed over here 💯💯💯💯💯
The video just went up four minutes ago...how could it be a thumbs down?! Didn’t even watch the entire video.