How to make peace with repetition in dementia care.
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- Опубліковано 11 жов 2024
- Make peace with the need for repetition in dementia care. Frustration is futile and hurts the dementia caregiver as well as their loved ones. Try repeating positive, loving statements as often as possible to balance out your experience as a dementia caregiver and create a more peaceful environment for yourself and your loved one. #dementiacaregiver #Dementiacare #dementia #repetition #DianeChew
In one short minute this couple won my heart. Beautiful.
I worked with a lady who would continuously say to me ‘oh my, look at your lovely black hair’ and each time I would say ‘why thank you, don’t tell anyone it came out a bottle!’ and she would laugh uproariously everytime 😊 It was wonderful hearing her laugh, and it cheered me no end too ❤️
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My beautiful sister who was born 15 years before me repeated. Particularly questions. My nieces commented on my patience but I just realized that when she asked the same question it gave me the opportunity to edit and embellish to our heart’s content. I miss her so much. ❤
Wife, then girlfriend, brought me to meet the patriarch (grandmother) of her family on holiday to the very small town she was from. Her grandfather had had dementia for years. He liked to sit on the porch, drink coffee and chat with whoever happens by. Since there really isn’t much to do in a town with one stop light, 460 people and a restaurant that opens only Saturday 4-8, I sat and chatted with her grandfather. I listened to the same stories multiple times a day for two weeks. He was so enthusiastic when telling them it was a joy to share the time. When we were packing the car for the drive home her grandmother walked over and gave me the biggest bear hug while whispering thanks for entertaining Bobby. As we pulled out she yelled to my wife to not bother bringing anyone else but me back to meet her because they weren’t welcome.
Yes, we have to give into it, and hang on to the humor. My client always says when we go shopping and she's tring to find all the items she misplaces 'can we get me a new brain?', and I say, 'can we get me one too?' Just because someone lives with dementia does not mean they have lost their feelings, sensations, emotions, dignity, or their sense of humor. 💜🇨🇦
Never thought about what you wrote. In my ignorance, I thought the feelings were gone. And that anger was the only emotion they feel. Thank you. You made me see this with other eyes.
My mother would repeat this story about how some event made her made. So one day when she got to the part where she was just about to say, "Boy, that made me mad", I said in an amazed voice, "Wow, I bet that made you mad?" She would just stop, stare, smile and say, "Yes it did." Then she was on to another story. She was a brilliant, talented and kind woman. She passed 15 years ago and I still miss her even though we weren't particularly close.
Unbelievable strength. Absolutely dignified.
Diane, I love you. I take care of my 96 yr old mother, and while she doesn't have dementia, she has no short term memory. I have to repeat the same things to her every day, which can frustrate me. Your quick video has taught me to be more patient (which is something I lack). thank you.
Before dementia, my older sister had a record collection with over five thousand titles. Near the end, she only wanted to listen to Dueling Banjos...over and over and over again.
Oh dear lordt... I'm sorry! There's no song I'd want to hear nonstop but that one is pretty far down on the list!
@@nonyabidness5708 Not only that, but no matter how simple I made it, she had become incapable of playing it on UA-cam without my help. P.S.- Did you watch the final season of Umbrella Academy? The radio in their van kept playing Baby Shark and they couldn't turn it off. :)
What a beautiful woman and spirit. It was so touching to see how your laughter affected him. Thank you for sharing. ❤
Nothing more beautiful than old love.
I am smiling while I’m watching this video. The love you have for each other is so evident. Thank you for sharing your intimate moments.
Thank you for watching and sharing with us! You just never know what’s going to come out of Ben’s mouth. I was so grateful that I caught it for myself and to share! A Joy shared is truly doubled, a grief Shared is cut in half:) ❤
He married the right girl.
Who came in the. Room? You did. ! 👏👏💕💕
So he's still got his sense of humour, awww. ❤
Bless your heart that you can roll with it with a smile on your face & joy in your heart. Hold onto that. ❤
You’ve obviously had and got such a wonderful marriage I wish you both the best x
I wish I were as good and kind as this nice woman.
The thing about memory loss is that you get to hear the same good news repeatedly over and over and it always gives you the same sense of joy. I loved hearing about a relatives pregnancy announcement several times over and over. I got to be excited many times. 🎉😂
Thank you for sharing your love and your wisdom !!!
You are a wonderful example of living unconditional love !!!
Your video is an excellent reminder of GIVING to the other the words we wish to receive ...
That's why I have this on loop!
You are so right. When it comes right down to it, it's going to be ok.
Another thing I found very helpful with my mother was when she was frustrated & angry from not understanding & fighting it so hard, I would change the subject like nothing happened with a happy tone & a suggestion I knew she would like-such as going to sit outside on the porch or going to get an ice cream cone, etc. The phase just last a few years out of 13 & I miss her.
Wow,what a beautiful heart❤and such a happy,loving couple.Much love to both of you x
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That was beautifully said- and perfectly shown as you spoke. That instinctive grasp of your hand and the loving looks, memories and function may fade, but that love remains. Many moments to cherish. Such an inspired message in a bottle.
Total sweetness.
If you care for an older person, you do have to MAKE PEACE with repetition.
What a truly lovely outlook! Thank you for sharing and I wish you nothing but love and many peaceful moments on your journey 💕
Beautifully said❤😊
You are SO right on this issue. My Mom had dementia and I was her caregiver for 3 years before she began to need 24/7 care. I used to get SO frustrated with the repetition........then it finally sunk in that it is not her fault........she meant no harm........it was a symptom of the terrible disease. It changed how I behaved when the repetition occurred. Not everyone understands. Thanks for shedding light on this topic. Blessing to you and your loved one.
Such a great message.
I LOVE your beautiful message!
That was a great suggestion!
The spirit of love between you both really shines through! 💙🦋💙
You’re an amazing human being.
Beautiful
Thank you, this video is a blessing, I hadn't realised I was already doing this. I have been so focused on the frustrating repetition, rather than the positive ones. Thank you for flicking that light switch.
Well that was simply beautiful.
Thank you, just sent this to my daughter. I don’t have dementia, but, both my parents did, Alzheimer’s and frontal-lobe dementia.
well said x
that was lovely
It helps if you think of comments not as giving information but as weaving a spell, as an incantation. Then it makes sense for both of you to say something over and over, whether it's "put on your sweater," "we're going to have supper now," or "I love you."
That was incredibly helpful , thank you .
This is beautiful, thank you!❤️
Amazing ❤ Keep smiling.
Bless you!
You're a very lovely couple..!!!!❤❤❤❤
Thank you. Perfect timing 😊.
Beautiful ❤
Wonderful
Sometimes you have to find happiness and enjoy and the smallest things. Although it is difficult, you look like you’ve hit on how to make yourself happy with the small things.
Super sweet!
Only a cruel fool tells someone with dementia that they have already said that, or corrects them, or gets angry.
Some books refer to it as ‘their tapes’.
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RIGHT
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She has no idea does she?
Geez. They dont make them like you anymore. Quality people.
What a beautiful video. Thank you
Thank you, this video is a blessing, I hadn't realised I was already doing this. I have been so focused on the frustrating repetition, rather than the positive ones. Thank you for flicking that light switch.