Divorce Attorney Reveals The RED FLAGS You Should NEVER IGNORE In A Man! | Faith Jenkins

[@LisaBilyeu]

Do you think some relationships deserve a second chance? Why or why not?

[@dkhowimalivev3633]

Second chances turn into third chances just be single I am so happy on my own and I used to be SO codependent on men…now I enjoy my plants and my silence

[@tbev58]

I’d say just depends on the people and circumstances. And the chances the involved people are willing to take.
We’re all trying to figure this thing called Life out together😃

[@Nickywigs]

No

[@micheleford8774]

With out work done NO!! Because there a reason why you separated in the frist place..life is Short you gotta be happy with or with out someone.🌹❤️

[@beautifulstoryteller8105]

Yes we are human and we all make mistakes at some point. Whether it's little ones or BIG ones. I do believe second chances are ok only if your willing to look at the person in a different way. Sometimes we persevere things one way and it's not how it actually was at the time. If someone is of importance to us second chances are a way to learn how we will react to things this time. An then after the second chance we can decide what we will do and allow for our wellbeing. Don't get me wrong though, if someone crosses the wrong lines and it's unforgivable to you then don't let them walk all over you. Just make sure you take a step back an look at the whole picture before making your life changing decision.

[@thipimotsoare4228]

"people dont have relationship problems they have problems that they bring in the relationships" I felt that

[@felsgrowth]

Me too! And it makes so much sense logically!

[@misstigerbubbles]

That's not true hahahaha what if someone cheats...

[@brittneyharmon6647]

@@misstigerbubbles That’s still a problem that they brought into the relationship. A cheater has a problem with themself. Why do you not love yourself enough to leave a situation you’re no longer happy in? Why are you afraid to be alone? Why do you not have the courage to speak to your partner about what you want? Did your parents always disregard your feelings that you feel that it’s not safe to?

[@tezh5897]

@@misstigerbubbles If a person cheats then they clearly lack accountability, focus, restraint, integrity, and morality. Just poor character all around, and 9 times out of 10 they were this way before the relationship even started! I'm a guy and I'm selective af on who I decide to hang with and/or call a friend. Guys love to brag about how much a** they get, especially if its outside of their relationship! When this happens I'll immediately distance myself from that person as it scream "poor character and untrustworthy." If you cheat on your woman (who's suppose to be your best-friend), then I know for sure that you'll fck me over. Same concept applies to female friendships too.

[@misstigerbubbles]

@@brittneyharmon6647 hm, I understand your perspective more clearly now and I appreciate you responding, you're very insightful thankyou!

[@23andme77]

" If I give someone the power to make me happy, then I'am also giving them the power to make me sad" that's so true. My dad use to say " If you give someone the power to feed you, you also give them the power to starve you". I've lived by his quote!

[@Elketjeable]

@@NotSoEntertaining. I'm joining the thievery!!

[@Elketjeable]

💯💯💯

[@ecclairmayo4153]

Bingo

[@cisi3447]

I needed that quote 🙏🏽

[@vfree4579]

Love your dad! I wish I had one In my early years. I certainly would have not made some of the mistakes and I would have been protected but I survived.

[@DarlingNickki777]

She said: Don’t choose history over happiness! I felt that deeply! 😢

[@nancypierre-louis7102]

Me too😢

[@Melanierose.821]

I was coming to the comments to say that

[@jessicacannady1931]

I was staying in my marriage for that reason. But now I'm getting a divorce.

[@khotness19]

“You can be the total package at the wrong address” I felt that!!! I’m buying her book!

[@queenfreedom9597]

same conversation that caused me to order judge on audible

[@dineatrislloyd9365]

Yes!

[@ljm7161]

Dumb comment

[@lizkim1546]

Direct and clear!

[@cbebop5]

@recoveringsoul She is married and has a daughter. And she is very open about her love story of waiting on the right one that led to her marriage.

[@epicelizzette]

LOVEEE When she said “ it’s easy to treat ppl right when things are going well, how ppl treat each other when things are not going well that is the key 🔑 and a reflection of someone’s true nature”

[@cynthiakila1161]

Right

[@anthonia3816]

True

[@keiracarmichael9430]

Things not going well don't always reflect a persons true nature, sometimes it kills or puts a persons true nature to sleep and gives birth to a fake persona that can adapt to the new and harsher environment...if that's makes sense😅.

[@Ms9mmBeretta]

It was the smallest thing. He never let me carry any bags. Never. The first time we had a bad argument, he just got out of the car and walked away and left me to carry about three or four bags. I know it may seem insignificant to some people, but that was a major red flag for me. His rapid personality change gave me an eerie feeling like he wouldn't piss on me if I was on fire if he was mad enough, I also got the feeling like he would ENJOY watching me burn. He wasn't just annoyed it was literal disregard, I could FEEL it. You got to get away from a guy like that.

[@heymisswest]

@@Ms9mmBeretta girl you just PREACHED!!!!!! I know that feeling! These so called "nice guys and safe choices" and low key petty and nasty and mean! I saw it!!! Once he found out about some things he tried to be the dream guy but I will never forget how horrible he was to me

[@user-cl6uj5bn2f]

I love that she talks about meeting her person after 40, I'm late 30s and refuse to settle

[@havvasweb]

ditti

[@Gigi-rg7xy]

Me too girl

[@justinamusyoka4986]

..And which is the best age to make babies? Just asking.

[@havvasweb]

@@justinamusyoka4986 at no age in this economy. nice pipe dream, though!

[@nlp3834]

How could u not find that person for 35+ years. Now I get that school can delay it but In retrospect when you are in your 40s it is going to be quite difficult to get the person you want because as you get older your looks fade away. Unfortunately, most men who you would consider good looking enough and have enough money in the same age bracket as yours will either be married or they do not commit to one woman. Sure you may find a guy that is single and still fits your requirements but the chances are really slim as you get older. how long are you still willing to wait?

[@annalynvang5516]

I met my husband at 17 got married at 21. We grew and mature together. Since we’ve spent our 20s together there’s not much past baggages we brought to the marriage. There were times I thought I have settled too soon, but it didn’t make sense to leave a relationship that is working. (Sometimes we talk ourselves into leaving something that may not be perfect, but no relationship is perfect. They all take some work from both people involved). He loves me, respects me, supports and encourages me to thrive in whatever I choose. We are currently growing our family and I’m so happy I found him when I was young.

[@irinaivanovic9792]

You're extremely lucky. Most people wish they got married that young precisely because you don't bring toxic baggage into someone else's life which only ends up hurting them and inevitably leads to the destruction of the relationship. I'm 41 and still single. Never met the love of my life and never will. These men today are like the most evil creatures roaming the earth. It's a lonely life being single and alone all the time. But I'm sick of getting my heart broken after investing all my heart and years of time with men who just end up toxic.

[@LocdPopTalks]

My wife and I have been together since we were 15. Married at 21, three children. We had our ups and downs. But the relationships works, I love my wife, and she respects me (winning combo). When you are lucky enough to recognize a good thing, keep it! Too many game players and broken ppl out in the single world.

[@RiverWoods111]

@@irinaivanovic9792 I would recommend that you investigate trauma therapy. A good therapy that can help you rebuild who you are, is DBT. It does not matter if you find a man or not, but you are very deeply (from what I am reading) cut by your past experiences. I learned a long time ago (why I stayed single and would not consider a relationship till I figured myself out), is that we attract people who are where we are at. That does not mean you are toxic, it means that you have a belief deep down under everything that you may not be even able to see, that says, this is what I am worth ________!
When I left my extremely toxic marriage 18 years ago, I vowed not to get into a relationship till I had healed whatever was within me that was allowing me to allow someone to treat me in that manner. It took me 18 years and a lot of therapy to find a psychologist that uses DBT, ACT, and EMDR therapies to allow me to heal all the trauma I had been through in my marriage, my childhood, and life in general. I am a completely different person these days, I finally know who I am now. I had to come home to myself.
I am not saying that if you do this you will meet an amazing man. I am saying that you will not give toxic men the time of day. You will demand respect, and you will take your time getting into relationships. You will have no issue walking out on anyone who does not respect you and treat you the way you deserve to be treated. There are men out there that will treat you right, but the problem is we keep dating the same person. Until we heal our person, we will continue to date the same person repeatedly, just with a different face, different body, but same toxic personality.
I watch people from a distance, and I cannot tell you how many times I see both women and men serial date the same man in different bodies. Each time it blows up, they get really upset and blame the man/woman. Yet, they refuse to take time to heal themselves and learn to respect themselves. If you want to meet different men, you must change how you view yourself. However, you will not find a non-toxic man if you are bitter and angry and continuing the old patterns. That is the problem with what she is talking about, most people cannot just sit down their baggage on the side of the road and walk away without it, without first doing some trauma therapy, and the best trauma therapy is DBT. Dialectical Behavior Therapy. Or you can stay mad and bitter and play the blame game, it is completely up to you. Oh, and I am not saying that the men you have been in relationships with are not toxic ugly people, but you will not find anything different without doing your own work.

[@ChristianOne]

I married young and knew I had a great guy but was curious about what all I may have missed out on, marrying so young. We split on great friendly terms for some life changes we both thought would be good, for us to go separate ways to grow more as individuals.
I have lived to REGRET THAT CHOICE like you wouldn't believe. I had NO IDEA how RARE good guys are in the older dating pool. I had NO IDEA the living hell players could put you through. I later married an awesome Christian minister who was my "dream guy" having every unique quality on my checklist. He turned out to be living a double life and I lost my career, savings, many friends, and health as we unraveled the relationship. I have been celibate and single for years now and if I could go back in time and kick my own young, dumb, butt... I would. I had GOLD and I traded it for KNIVES used to stab me in the back. Dumbest choice ever. Appreciate that man who treats you well and is faithful. Celebrate him, reapect him, honor him and be GRATEFUL every peaceful, drama-free day of your life that you have a great marriage in your life. Protect it. You are missing out on NOTHING BUT HEARTACHE.

[@nathalievriesde1930]

The same with my parents.

[@jojobrown2504]

I’d rather be single and childless than miserable in a horrible relationship with someone that treats me horribly

[@datingandlifeadvicechannel7534]

Me too

[@CHK12319]

Those aren’t the only options…

[@JoannA-sweetly]

Yes, rather not be divorced 2 - 3 times either!

[@LaughingblueSu]

It's not one or the other

[@happygal70]

Haha! I am single and childless and it's actually pretty awesome! But, I know what you're saying - better to be alone than with the wrong guy.

[@mememinaa7052]

Ladies don't forget. Men that want you to settle are the type that don't have much to offer in any capacity! Don't lower yourself for them or anyone else! Stay blessed.

[@minagill2806]

Yes!!!

[@Joy-mm3cz]

Thanks for the reminder.

[@aneesanabi6512]

Thank you for this

[@pipermcpickles5283]

Yes! This took me so long to learn, thank you for the reminder. 💕

[@Portia620]

Married one and he was cheating and I’m cheering them on. I know the truth of who he truly is as when sick found out so many lies, hidden money, and multiple women! Yet he said I’m flawed!

[@swatigulia2496]

We can't make others love us by loving them harder !

[@cccwomensempowerment]

Yes! It starts with loving the self!

[@sowens8328]

I was def guilty of this!

[@nikkyshamz2696]

📌📌📌

[@asiagoins0004]

This comment HERE🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽

[@delanabrown28]

THIS!!!!!!!!

[@jordanrintoul-thomas722]

I was in an emotionally abusive relationship for 8 years. Finally found the courage to leave and I'm so glad I did.

[@hurtingfeelingsdaily]

Good for you! I hope you are healing❤❤

[@janicerockwell8417]

Glad you didn't wait 20 years more at the risk of your health for the children. My ex is a narcissist and used me as his trophy wife to make himself look successful in others' eyes. I paid the price with depression even though it looked like we had a perfect life.
After he divorced me, I relocated to Florida and blossomed. He is in poor health and shows vengeance toward me, but loves his children to death.

[@OtakuBae_]

How did you let go?

[@datingandlifeadvicechannel7534]

Me too

[@BlackBeauty-yl8uq]

Wow! I share similar experiences here. I’m 39 and married for 19 years.

[@haliec496]

Single at 49. Been in longterm relationships since my 20's, engaged, lived with 2. I have never felt more peaceful and happier than i do now. I have no hoots to give what anyone thinks about my status. I know what i went through with them, financial, emotional, physical, verbal abuse. I brought myself back from the brink. I will never compromise ever again.

[@dianedehart]

I could have wrote your post myself! I wish you the best!

[@melis6294]

So are you saying all men are rotten? Or is it that you think you don't deserve a good man.

[@SVAsianPhilippinesGo6858]

Wow I wonder why sometimes, even if I write things similar to this, I don't really get a lot of upvotes or support. But hey, good for you. 🙂

[@datingandlifeadvicechannel7534]

Me too

[@yolandarosario992]

This is very close to my situation only I’m 59! I am at peace with myself and I will not settle. I cannot let anyone take my peace.

[@user-cl6uj5bn2f]

"Sometimes in life you're going to have to walk away from people that you love" for your own well-being YES 💯 I believe this applies to family/friendships as well

[@edubrazil3609]

Hi,get help from Dr Wilson in any kind of problem you might be encountering,he can help in getting someone (Ex) back, money spell,job spell, marriage spell protection spell,love spell, court cases spell, make himself/her confess spell, cleaning spell,also breaking evils curses in your life.
He really help me that why I am referring him to you.i advice you seek his help now
Thanks.

[@edubrazil3609]

Messaging him on WhatsApp

[@edubrazil3609]

✝️2348102689570⏯️⏯️💖(☉｡☉)!✝️

[@itstheengineersdaughter1296]

Yes.

[@mariaakopyan-dignifieddivo5694]

So true, and it does apply to family & friends as well. I had to learn this the hard way, but it's been a relief too after the initial pain.

[@danigomes7879]

As a woman who lowered myself completely for the wrong person who turned out to be a narcissistic abuser I 100% recommend that you listen to this and never settle! I know I will never do that again.

[@kg7439]

My testimony.... I see God in every one of these comments. #CONFIRMATION

[@CuracaoCow]

I did the EXACT same thing, sis. Hard lesson learned but it was absolutely learned......

[@kaitlynnbroke2321]

Me too. I won’t lower my standards now. I now do not have a problem being single

[@Cezeji1]

Same here

[@Veicity25]

This resonates with me so much I can relate

[@jenniferholmes9718]

I just ended it with a guy that I was dating for a few weeks. So many red flags and I was very proud of myself for not settling and walking away. I’m 38 and I would rather be happily single than miserable in a relationship. I’m happy being by myself doing me. I’ve been single for a few years and it’s the best thing I ever did for myself.

[@helloshante8573]

You go girl!!

[@nigamtatyana3427]

Makes 2 of us. 38 here and just ended a stupid relationship few weeks ago...Too many red flags

[@irinaivanovic9792]

@@nigamtatyana3427 Almost 41 here and found out the guy was only trying to get sex from me. He lied about who he was, he lied about EVERYTHING so that he could emotionally manipulate me into giving him sex (which I did not ever give him!). Talk about a waste of my precious time and I was hurt by that. This all happened last night. And believe it or not, it was because I asked if we could go out to dinner instead of accepting his invitation to go to his apartment to watch a movie, smh. I suggested we go out to dinner and walk around after. HE BLEW UP AT ME. He said I can't wait this long (for sex). He claimed "NO man will wait this long and I haven't brought up sex once." Mind you, we haven't seen each other in SIX MONTHS. WE have only been talking on the phone for hours at a time because he works too much. He just turned 44 in February. He ghosted me on Valentines' Day and his bday was a couple days after that. I didn't hear from him until April. So we began talking again and he talked a big talk about how he thinks we were destined to be together and how he always wanted me to be his woman but he never had time for me working 7 days a week (which he still is). He said that's why he accidentally went silent. Smh. So many red flags. I met him online last July btw, and he has still NEVER progressed this into a relationship which he knew very well that was what I was looking for, I made it clear I would not to any type of situation ship or casual sex. He mirrored my intentions of wanting a relationship with his WORDS. Not actions, which I was paying attention to. You can imagine my disappointment to just last night find out by him saying he thinks talking for hours on the phone is "putting in effort" and that at this point, he is unwilling to put in ANY more effort aside from the 2 dinner dates he took me out on LAST YEAR. I was shocked and disgusted. It's sick how dog-like these males are today. The only thing they are willing to do is LIE TO YOU just to try and get you to hand over your body. I told him off last night saying he'd never find a woman like me again, and he admitted he knows he won't but that he can't wait for sex any longer. I called him out for lying to me and just wanting me for my body. So that's that.

[@Fire_Moon_Tarot]

I’m happy you didn’t sleep with him. Good for you for ending it!

[@realestatecoach8626]

@@irinaivanovic9792 He was evil and a narcissist! Thank God you listened to the Holy Spirit!

[@calishinholster8400]

OMG when she said she got married after she turned 40 my jaw dropped. She looks so much younger I really thought she was in her late 20s. You go girl! ✊🏽🖤 and I love divorce court you’re doing a great job taking over.

[@newcatherine153]

Thank you, I was reading comments looking for this, she is beautiful and looks much more younger .

[@psycho7.7]

Metoo😳😍🔥

[@CG-uh9zc]

Yes she looks like a baby

[@carolhutchinson7763]

That's what never being married does. I had a new doctor stare at my medical information for a long time, then look over and stare at me for about 10 seconds, then look at the papers again. He then said "You're 68 years old?" I said yes. He said "Why you look 35 years old!" I thought it was because I was still producing hormones but I'm wondering if never being married was part of it if there that much difference seen by the doctor. I should say though that never going through menopause (a rare thing) isn't all good. It's highly carcinogenic and the doctor I mentioned is an oncologist.

[@ladyinred3735]

That's why she looks younger. She was not married earlier and therefore the stress did not age her. haha

[@SpringHWhipple]

"Fear doesn't serve you, it poisons your perspective." - Judge Faith Jenkins

[@temjenkrazy]

Fear is a reaction. But courage is a decision.

[@derekgoran5289]

yes, you right about that, we have take fear away from anything we do and take courage as our perfect decision even in our deepest pain. Where are you chatting from? hope you don't mind me asking.

[@snoozyq9576]

That's dumb without fear humans wouldn't exist

[@crystalp8840]

"If you really believe that the best is still out there for you, then why become angry when a relationship ends." Yesssss!!! I just said to a friend today, my faith tells me that there is someone out there better for me.

[@artvandelay3922]

Never ending search for the impossible

[@eugenieholmes7846]

Amen

[@mrslavanderblu]

It’s ok to be angry. Why pretend it doesn’t hurt? Just don’t stay in your hurt.

[@kathyalex778]

Always better to be single than to settle, but also isn’t it tricky to be waiting a long time until you find the “right” one for you? You cannot think “there must be someone better” forever. Again, don’t settle, but also be clear and realistic about what it is you do want.

[@anniek3805]

I felt this loud enough! The best is out there!

[@suriyamohd]

I was in a 4 year relationship and still took time to leave him. And I always felt unattached but still couldn't leave him. I finally left him and I can say that yes, I should have left him much more earlier. Please, always listen to your intuition, to your gut feeling

[@meghan3835]

I did the same sis.

[@timweedon2785]

Thats called a cluster B personality disorder. They don't attach and waste people's time. Could be that you are a narcissist

[@yahchelrachel]

Almost there...

[@fizahaque]

I also left because of my gut feeling. I hope I stick to it.

[@jacquelinegordon-ahmad3062]

Going through this right now. Going on 6 years but I decided on year 4 that I was going to leave him.

[@tineygerm301]

This woman moved me to tears. As a woman who is single and 35, I'm exhausted by feeling judged and the sheer pressure thats placed on me every time I get asked questions about why I'm single and not living my life the same as most people.

[@lexygrace3160]

You tell them "I'm lucky,I guess!" Think about it

[@catherineking2751]

Have you ever noticed people ask those questions when you're in front of a group of people, but never ask when it's just the two of you?

[@LNB259]

I felt the same and I finally mourned and let it go. I’m not open to being in the wrong relationship.

[@LNB259]

There is something to be said about being lucky to be alone for sure - not being abused or miserable every day.

[@taniapylypiv3323]

❤❤❤

[@flowerpink33]

My son goes through the same thing. He has his degree, working career at his own pace, a beautiful young man. Not problematic very respectful and everyone is worried about when he gonna date. They don’t even bother with the fact that he isn’t out abusing anyone, not a baby daddy, instead of celebrating his wins they focused on what THEY think he should have. It’s sad but that’s the society we live in.

[@shamajabrown9749]

Sounds like my mom and grandma and its frustrating!! I try not to let it get to me

[@winnieeldama4687]

They should let me be.there is nothing wrong with him

[@kpoplover1901]

In my culture this kind of pressure is only placed on women and its rarely ever on the men. It's interesting to see how its affecting your son. My dad doesn't pressure me but at 25 its all my mom asks about now. She is almost pleading with me to find a boyfriend even though i havent even started working full time yet (going to this fall post-Masters). They really should be focusing on his successes and shouldn't pressure him.

[@amysworld5521]

He maybe cheating u dont know

[@MissMoontree]

Your son sounds like a wonderful person, you should be proud!

[@KeziahMuthoni]

Sometimes rejection really is God's protection.
I'm on the journey of being happy alone and not settling. Love judge Faith👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾

[@freedom4063]

I'm 37 I enjoy my freedom no kids no arugment lol

[@shamajabrown9749]

Same here! I'm 27 its better to start now then later or never I got to work on me, I'm a single parent of 1 child

[@RosalindJulen]

It really is

[@osirusj275]

Rejection is coz what they want, they can't find in you, so it's not a match, or maybe few years later u will achieve what they want in a partner but you dint convey that message to ask them wait for u, or they don't want to wait for u.. Or u dint convey it at all...it can be God's protection or it could just mean there's misfit compatibility which I think can be improved on..

[@jennyk1509]

True it is. It can hurt but it's God's protection

[@BooDotBoo]

I used to care about being single, thinking something was wrong because women around me seemed to find a man anytime they turned around, but I realize I'm single because I have standards and I know my self worth. A lot of these same women I see with a man all the time, are literally with a new man all the time because the men they get with are not good men, or they stay with men who treat them horribly. Couldn't be me. Now, I'm never sad or feel bad about being single. I'll stop being single when I see someone worth being with. Until then, I'm enjoying my peace.

[@skyfangbang]

or you might be lesbian?

[@Sevenofseven27]

I have voluntarily been single for 6 months after leaving my long term relationship and honestly this is the happiest I’ve felt in a while. I realize how far self love really takes you and I love and cherish solitude more than anything now. Never again will I let someone disturb my peace in the name of love

[@carorine_ug]

Sorry dear .

[@pricillageorge6593]

I feel you. I'm now beginning the journey.Divorce after 15yrs of marriage. It feels strange I'm outside of the domestic now everything feels so different. New beginning with myself❤

[@DollyMoss]

What happened to the red flags conversation???

[@priyapixi]

This message is so important to women in today’s society to accept it’s ok to be single and rather meet the right person in gods timing. Not forced into a relationship due to others pressure and society’s expectations.

[@jezzyj2987]

What is the right person?

[@priyapixi]

@@jezzyj2987 I mean the right person for yourself where you meet each other’s needs and look after each other. There isn’t no selfishness and there is trust,loyalty love and care.

[@mariaakopyan-dignifieddivo5694]

Exactly!

[@priyapixi]

@Ally Carraway I agree you also must acknowledge what part you may have played as no one is perfect. And I’m not someone who would jump from relationship to relationship because that never resolves anything instead focused myself on my goals and healing ☺️

[@moma5501]

@Ally Carraway ‼️🙏🙏

[@mayranunez4423]

“They choose history over happiness” I felt that

[@jjkatz]

Me too. I’ve stayed too long in dysfunctional relationships because I would think back how it was good in the beginning. Big mistake!

[@TheNrodr690]

I’m going through that right now

[@traceylennon1204]

THAT PART...too many people believe in that theory!!

[@RDCFemmes]

aka divest

[@christianbenn316]

& that's a red flag

[@puritysiddi]

My dad always tells me “ my daughter it is better to wait unto the lord than rush and end up with the wrong man cry everyday “ I really felt that… thanks to my papa ..
help me God make the right choise in Jesus name amen !!

[@assoeraif1955]

Amen

[@stephaniemensah1858]

Amen 🙏🏽❤️

[@melisaco79]

“The pressure” it’s really bad especially in families. My relatives were so toxic and were the primary source of much of my trauma. I was pressured into marriage, pressured into an abusive relationship and going into a career to please them. After I went no-contact with all of those toxic people, my life improved exponentially.

[@taniapylypiv3323]

❤❤❤

[@gorgeeus]

I haven’t felt this empowered in a while! 36 years old, no children, been dating for 20 years with nothing to show for it…or so I thought. Each of those experiences have made me the woman I am today. Waking up to this video brightened my morning, and I will carry this energy into my day. I am love, and I’m not defined by any outside of me. Thank you to this channel, and for this wealth of information.❤️💐👏🏽

[@ariaborja1016]

feeling sad over a break -up, im 35 no kids.. yeah, dating for a while with nothing to show for it. but we must not settle right?

[@Yeniphur]

As a woman who had a different life journey- I love, respect and honor you and your path. We need to stop invalidating each other. Many people are not on the path they chose. Let’s be kind and supportive.
I’m so glad you have found the peace and value in your experiences. ❤️

[@rosej5029]

I don't want to be a fear monger but I'm scared to date because of the statistics of intimate partner violence for USA. It's insane. The numbers actually make it seem that a woman is literally risking her life by dating males. I've researched the signs/red flags to look out for in the male but I feel safer staying single.

[@bp7592]

Prey to God he will give you a husband dunt settle it's allot demonize man out hear in the world

[@shyamalidasgupta671]

Please take help from a psychologist/ psychotherapist- it is highly possible that you are not choosing the right kind of person/ choosing the wrong person because of maladaptive childhood attachment styles

[@insoromanoworries7923]

Two words ladies. Financial freedom!
I have seen alot of women settling for garage because they depend on someone for food and a roof....

[@edubrazil3609]

Hi,get help from Dr Wilson in any kind of problem you might be encountering,he can help in getting someone (Ex) back, money spell,job spell, marriage spell protection spell,love spell, court cases spell, make himself/her confess spell, cleaning spell,also breaking evils curses in your life.
He really help me that why I am referring him to you.i advice you seek his help now
Thanks.

[@edubrazil3609]

Messaging him on WhatsApp

[@edubrazil3609]

✝️2348102689570⏯️⏯️💖(☉｡☉)!✝️

[@jupiterskiss3473]

I agree. It provides options, choices, and freedom!!! 🛫

[@keiracarmichael9430]

Exactly! I think that's why alot of dudes these days got issues with the "strong independent" type cause they know those type of women can easily walk away if their men start acting up, whilst those who have to depend on a man can't walk or it will take significantly longer which can cause her precious yrs to be wasted.

[@ChosenWonton-zs8sq]

Im getting out of my abusive marriage and for me, divorce is a blessing and opportunity for happiness. I am so thankful I have the ability to make a major change in my life rather than staying stuck where Im being continually disrespected & dishonored. Im a great wife and mom and give too much love to stay with someone who says Im not deserving of basic decency and honesty.

[@stylist1262]

I stayed in a toxic relationship for 30 years because for the sake of keeping the family together was discarded for the third and last time I educated myself on emotional abuse and went through the pain and work to find my peace and self love I’m divorce and still working on my self feeling so relieved I over came and faced my fears of being alone. All along I had the strength and courage to continue my journey. I am feeling confident and happy single ❤

[@elnathanmaduhu3689]

U have described my situation 😢😢😢

[@hatsnroses12]

I'm in the same 27 years still here some good days some bad but I know time is coming for me to go. You're encouraging to know you been here and made it❤

[@ArchAngel435]

​@@hatsnroses12Some good some bad makes it hard to walk away. Trust me I know how it feels. And you end up going from year to year till you finally wonder what's really wrong with you

[@girlinterrupted2625]

I’ve been married for 20 years. However, it has been rough. Watching this video makes me realize that I settled. Although he turned into a better person getting him there took a lot out of me. I’m not in love with him anymore and the damage that I’ve sustained in this relationship made me lose confidence in my abilities to survive without him. We have children be cause he wanted them. I resent him even though I love my children I feel burdened by them. It’s not their fault that their here but sometimes I treat them like an inconvenience. There is a lot that I could write a book and I wonder why I stayed because a lot have people would have walked away. Don’t stay if you can help it. It’s not your job to be loyal or supportive through abuse. Whether that’s mental or physical.

[@bernadettesimmons1439]

Oh my sorry

[@Ilikefrogs..]

I'm so sorry, and thank you so much for passing on the wisdom you've gained. The love you deserve is still out there, and please don't feel trapped in a marriage that doesn't and has never served you. You and your kids will be happier.

[@tifftreads]

💓

[@heymisswest]

Damn baby girl I understand that and thank you for your comment

[@karenwhite4141]

I've been married 13 years. We have no children. I have been enduring 2 and a half years of emotional and mental abuse. I'm. Being accused of cheating and making PORN! It's like my husband has lost his mind! I've NEVER cheated or even considered cheating. I'm tired of being thought of in that light, being humiliated, disrespected. It hurts so much. I want to leave, but I don't want to be alone. I can take care of myself. I'm attractive. I'm 45. But I'm holding on to the good times we had and still have with abuse every two-three weeks. I'm scared and don't know what to do. I wanna leave but I wanna stay. I just know I'm tired of being hurt with the accusations and name calling and harassment at work.

[@anitadavenport7209]

My motto is, I'm single right now because I'm very selective. Everyone doesn't deserve a chance to be with me. I don't want to go back through some relationships from the past.

[@Portia620]

I get that one!

[@anitadavenport7209]

@@Portia620 Thank you

[@therealkoolaidandkale]

Chile. It's not even a motto for me: it's real life. Friends and family tell me sometimes: "You're too picky." I don't feel the need to explain, argue, whatever... I just let them think what they want. The truth is that I understand the gravity of the influence that the person with whom you spend most of your time has on you. I look at their love lives and relationships and very often feel sorry for them because they weren't picky enough. 😩

[@anitadavenport7209]

@@therealkoolaidandkale A motto is something you live by, so it's the same thing.

[@therealkoolaidandkale]

@@anitadavenport7209 mot·to
/ˈmädō/
Learn to pronounce
noun
a short sentence or phrase chosen as encapsulating the beliefs or ideals guiding an individual, family, or institution.
I don't have a sentence or phrase applicable to my beliefs or actions. So, no: they're similar concepts but not the same thing, dear.
It's ok: I've been loud & wrong before, too. 🙂 Be blessed!

[@CarasPlace]

You can’t control what other people do. You can only control how you respond to it. 💎 I love this! This interview was everything.

[@MrsTruthTeller]

At 35, I just ended a four year relationship and then shortly after that, I met an absolutely crazy man who looked like Prince Charming on paper but clearly had some mental health issues that I thought I could save him from. I currently feel so depleted and hopeless and was ready to accept that maybe love and marriage is just not meant for me. Listening to this video has literally changed my life. Especially since I am also a black female attorney just like Faith. I have a 2 year old daughter, I have a career that I LOVE, I volunteer in my community, I'm making more money than I even ever dreamed of, I have great friends and a supportive family, I am dedicated to staying in therapy to continuously improve myself and I am taking care of my health, body, and mind. I am ready to be happy again and to just enjoy my life because it is beautiful and fulfilling, even without a partner. Thank you Faith! Your words are beyond encouraging and uplifting. Just bought your book too :)

[@Jamiefit11]

Congratulations on all your success. It is better to be in peace than to end up with a man that will disturb your peace.

[@sylwiakowalczyk3270]

Perfection yeah!

[@Jen_ell]

Every relationship is a lesson in learning who we are and what we want, as well as what we deserve. Continue working on being in love with you and the life you are creating for yourself. You have alot to be proud of! As you heal from past hurt and fall deeply in love with your life, you will attract someone on your frequency. Enjoy yourself and keep doing the things that are fulfilling to you.

[@Nono38-jj1tk]

Please reveal your secrets. How do you have time to work full time, volunteer in your community and still find time to raise your two year old?

[@sojournerwilliams7668]

You sound like an awesome soul! God’s Speed Beautiful Sister 🌸

[@Chanrobyn.]

“You can be the total package at the wrong address” wow that hit me!
My ex was constantly trying to improve me, Of course we all have room for improvement and healing but he would prefer to improve me than say anything positive.
I’m glad I the video opened with that statement x

[@iam_maggimbi8102]

I relate here..

[@IMTinaMarieJ]

@@iam_maggimbi8102 Same here

[@lamismadeochodias]

one of my exes was just like that, trying to "improve me" became his bread n butter even my accent bothered him.

[@missdesireindependance5194]

He was the wrong person. The right person will accept you flaws and all.

[@Chanrobyn.]

@@missdesireindependance5194 this message came at the right time. Thank you

[@amaragrace94]

This confirms the wisdom shared by the married men in my life (dad, brother in laws, friends). A man THAT IS ACTUALLY READY FOR MARRIAGE only needs 6 months - 1 year to know if you are the one. Any longer than that and 1) he's not sure about you but he's comfortable (stalling), 2) his finances aren't where he wants them to be, 3) he has other goals he wants to accomplish first (career), and/or 4) he has committment issues. For me personally, I want to date a man for minimum of 1 year to see how he moves in each season before I commit to a lifetime together. And I will walk away at the 2 year mark as to not waste too much time.

[@kimallnaturelle]

I believe my now partner is #2 or #3, I'm giving him 6 more months to move (have more action in his goals) before I choose to walk away. I love him and his family but I can't remain in a relationship with someone not as motivated as I am with their own goals. I need to see more fruit and it doesn't have to be career related at all. That's the only thing keeping me from saying "yes" if he proposes and I've already voiced this to him as well. Our 1 year anniversary is tomorrow.

[@amaragrace94]

@@kimallnaturelle Sit down and have a talk with him to get to the root of it. I wouldn't mention the 6 months time limit. Keep that to yourself. Figure out if the problem is a lack of effort or if he is actually really putting in the work and not succeeding. Hopefully it is the latter. As his future life partner and teammate, ask him what you can do to help. A win for him is a win for the both of you. Go through his plan with him and see if there is anything that can be tweaked. If he's been trying one thing and it's not working, he has to switch some things up. Then give him these next 6 months to show you he can follow through and check in with him frequently on his progress. When you see how hard he is working, hit him with that words of affirmation. A simple "I am so proud of you" can do alot. Have that "us against the problem" mindset and y'all will get through it. Also happy anniversary 😊! I hope it all works out.

[@Musiyca]

Psychology also adds that to know the core of other person you need only 2-3 years to discover that. So if after that time one or both of you don't want to commit to the same things then it's good to go separate ways.

[@thesongstylingsoflaradiane5869]

@@kimallnaturelle Love this.

[@icequeen491]

Wow, 1-2 years?! I think I will know in just within a month of being with someone if he’s a keeper. I am very in touch with myself that anything that does not align stands out and away from my life. Also I am very keen with questions and observing. I can easily pick a man apart to know his character. Ladies you don’t need one year to know. Your spirit should know even before you agree to date.

[@stellapetrosyan7459]

I LOVE the way Lisa Bilyeu listens to all of her guests, she seems so interested in everything that is being said and she is deeply involved in the conversation

[@joannemcclelland5271]

I was thinking the same thing! And she asks GREAT questions!

[@cryptomum6110]

Yes, she's a great host!

[@mediocrebankai]

She mentioned exactly what I figured out after some awful relationships, I was fed up and decided that I would only date someone with all these traits I will not settle anymore. Sure enough, one fell right into my lap. Because I knew exactly what I wanted and because he checked every box and more I accepted the relationship. However, if I hated working out we would have clashed alot because I wouldn’t understand the time he put into it, this is an example of what she spoke about. There were also things I just had to accept about him as a human, little stuff. Now happily married to my best friend :)

[@cherrydeleon9646]

Yes, make sure they have their own place to live is very important. It's hard to get him or vice versa out. Much blessings to our lovely single life. Freedom!!! Peace

[@cherrydeleon9646]

My thumbs up button is stuck. A pleasure reading your brilliant & sincere comments.
Peaches JAMAICA 🇯🇲 HARLEM NYC

[@qwamby]

i love the fact that she mentioned that 'you will know who people are when things are wrong. Its easy to treat people when things are right. The way they handle you when you have shortcomings tells everything about them.

[@janicerockwell8417]

Yep.

[@bikuuesaka2008]

I also went to therapy with my now husband before we got engaged. Whenever others heard that, they would ask “how are you having issues already?” But my perspective is the same as Judge Faith’s, I wanted us to be prepared and I wanted to be sure before stepping into marriage.

[@tianna1064]

Smart move!

[@sandralujan1199]

I plan on doing the same. Currently single. Therapy has helped me communicate who i really am and it’s also helped me be the person I need to be to hit the goals I’ve been hitting. So we starting on the right foot.

[@bikuuesaka2008]

@@tianna1064 Thank you 😊

[@bikuuesaka2008]

@@sandralujan1199 I’m glad you found therapy so helpful! I also did therapy on my own for a while before I met my now husband! It’s a great start.

[@adriana27100]

Absolutely!!! This is so smart and will give you both a lot of insight before fully knowing you want this commitment! Wish you both the best of luck! 🙌🏻❤️🙌🏻

[@user-xu4uh1wp7t]

this entire sit-down was absolutely flooding with gems. just *some* of my favourites included:
1 - "are they committed to the same commitment, and are you working towards that commitment together (strives to putting in work, in treating you well, in bettering themselves)?"
2 - "people do not change because they're being forced yo by someone else.. nagging doesn't work, an ultimatum doesn't work" YES! people who are sincere about changing will always start from their own heart - as partners we can still be both the suggestor and supporter of change, but we can't force it to them for it to be real and sustainable
3 - the resentment building being a core part of relationships falling apart is so true, if you recognise a change in character or value it needs to be discussed honestly and cleanly to see what the next best step is 😭 humans make things so complicated when we're dishonest and passively sitting in spite
4 - "they choose history over happiness" omg exactly. 💔👏🏼
5 - "i didn't want someone new in my life to pay the price for something they had nothing to do with in my past" THIS is the mature mindset we all need to grow into, so much respect 🙏🏼
6 - "it's an artificial timeline. the people asking you about it is a reflection of them, not you. get used to ignoring all the noise around you" YESS SAY IT AGAIN!!
7 - i especially admired how she learned to stop taking rejection personally ever again because of a greater story we often don't know about!
8 - "how can i be the best of myself to let them into my life VS moulding yourself to fit that person's life"
9 - "we do all our research in all these things, but we don't do it for matters of the heart.. you can't just show up and expect it to happen." 💯💯💯
*UGHH I love this,* her grounding wisdom and the way she delivers herself, and the host did such an excellent job!! the best kind of humans to listen to are those who had the courage and humility to learn and grow from experiences for the better.
i honestly i don't buy books that often but i'm so tempted to buy Faith's book! ❤

[@joyricherson4570]

Do it! Do it!

[@lauvonfr9222]

Everyone is not meant to be married but if you're single people tend to make you feel odd. As I've become an older woman I realized I shouldn't have gotten married and got out. Some of the loneliest people are married or in toxic relationships. Once, you know who you are and accept it, life gets better. Having good friends and family is always a plus. Don't surround yourself with negative people and stop waiting for someone to go out with date yourself and you'll be surprised at the people you meet.

[@ecclairmayo4153]

I really like this advice

[@phillycheesecakesss3012]

Her “Sis don’t settle” book opened my eyes to how to look at my future relationships & showed me where my past marriage & relationships went wrong. I highly recommend every single, dating woman to read it.

[@tanisha2761]

I am 42 and never been married and I don't have any children as yet. And I can tell you that I used to feel embarrassed about been single and and without children. Right now I am working on myself and I would love to get married and have children whenever it's my time. I am not stressing myself anymore to meet someone. I believe I will meet someone when the time is right.

[@kimkitty3914]

Hi. Tanisha you want kids after 40? Is that possible? Isn’t too risky?

[@tanisha2761]

@@kimkitty3914 Yes, it is very much possible to get pregnant in your 40s and everything pregnancy carries a risk no matter at what age. Some women get pregnant in their 40s. Love and Light.

[@kimkitty3914]

@@tanisha2761 I’m 37 I have a 6 year old boy and i feel im too old for second one. Is exhausting raising a child. Good luck ❤️

[@dorothyaugustyniak3618]

Women can have kids in their 40s, I k how several. Take care of yourself healthwise and make sure to have your eggs frozen as a backup.

[@kimkitty3914]

@@dorothyaugustyniak3618 ohhh 😲 that’s another thing, yes women can have kids after 40, as long as you already have frozen 🥚 eggs, Daaah

[@jeanettee6828]

16:05 man it hit the nail on the head. That feeling of being disrespected is like no other feeling especially coming from your partner that is never supposed to hurt you. Needed this

[@jaciemokidm609]

Lots of people still believe or simply act like men want to feel respected while women want to feel loved. It's very annoying. Respect is a two-way street, and without it there is no love.

[@shiiraspalette]

Ordered the book right away while listening this . I got dumped by the man I thought im going to marry. I believe that rejection is universe way of protecting us too. Love this episode so much 💗💗

[@sheberry8597]

Yesss

[@queensun6059]

👸cowards, leavers & cheaters are repeaters👹. thank God he dumped u b4 the wedding bc he would've dumped u after🤡. celebrate 🥳halelujah!!! now u can meet a man worthy of a queen😌.

[@JoannA-sweetly]

Very sorry you experienced that pain, so glad you’re healing. 💕

[@TheSweetLondonLife]

A girl who was into my Dad in college wanted to go on a trip with him. He was excited too, but he had little money and no clothes that he could take on the trip, so he eventually declined and was too embarrassed to explain why. He feels bad for her to this day, because she would have never known the real reason. I too wonder how that must have punctured the young girl's self-confidence. So when Faith mentioned the prom-like incident from college, it just hit a chord. The takeaway is to never take rejection personally. It's hard, it's bitter, but it's not a reflection of who you are as an individual or an assault to your likability . Just be elegant facing it, and march on! ❤

[@valorideekon7716]

For me it was ... Are you committed to the same commitments? The simple and true answer was sadly... no. This is why I had to end it.

[@yourstruly1984]

Thank you for sharing

[@Peem_pom]

True but some people do actually say you’re uncool or ugly to your face as well….if you don’t know the reason you can’t tell and shouldn’t assume, but if they do tell you then what do you do…

[@yzma6142]

Wow I love this

[@yzma6142]

@@Peem_pom still don’t take it personally, their opinion isn’t fact.

[@Maya-xm5jx]

22 and HAPPILY single. I’m busy with university and my hobbies. I hate hate HATE when people ask where’s my boyfriend/husband? Like nothing that I accomplish on my own is valid unless I’m connected to a man. Smh. I’ll continue trusting in God and focusing on myself! Thank you for this pertinent dialogue!!!!💕💕💕💖💖💖

[@lorebay2593]

👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾You go gurl, this is the time to do you, learn you and sis, don’t settle to please others. At 22 you don’t need anyone or unnecessary responsibility. Now is your time to learn to become the woman you will be, you are young and impressionable and don’t need a boy or a man claiming you, shaping you or trying to mold you. God bless you and keep you for the one He desires for you. I think that (24,25-30 hopefully older and wiser) is a great age for marriage and children.
I just told my daughter this same last week, she’s not dating now either, finished college and trying to find her way in this world, she has big dreams for herself. I hope she listens and learn.

[@prettybrown6247]

I agreeee omfg😩 I’m 23 and have dealt with the pressures of dating because I’ve never had a boyfriend. I’m accomplished so much, graduated college and everything. People act like dating is the only thing to do in life

[@kaylaaskew890]

Same I have to remind myself that I’m so young and I deserve to live my life to the fullest and a man will come in time but chasing or being stressed out due to a guy is not worth it. This is probably one of my hardest lessons to date to let go but I’m trying

[@fionamasiye293]

This is my situation right like all I need is marriage right now

[@amandamills4410]

Same! My grandmother was literally just asking me if I have a boyfriend and I was like.. I've have things to do! I do want a boyfriend but that's gonna have to wait until I'm ready. After I've done things and experienced things for myself. sending my love to all my fellow singles out there!

[@NaturalLifestyleLounge]

I felt trapped in a relationship for a while, I drew a vision board of what I wanted in the new year, a place of my own. January 13 he told me to leave and I left, it took a few months but I got exactly What I wanted and what I was visualizing. Freedom and independence 🎉

[@chinikawells1563]

She said “you never marry the person you divorce!” That is so powerful && now I will be grateful && patient for Marriage, if it’s in my future and I’m taking my time. 🙏🏽😩🥰

[@kitakittykat]

Wait im stuck on 40. Judge Faith is GORGEOUS. She looks like she is in her 20s the only reason i know she is older is because she is so wise.

[@richayadav958]

I love the fact that she said we shouldnt internalise the shame of being single.
I have been single for many years now, and am happy with my single life. Society shames and mistreats women for being single, always implying that the woman is single because she must be seriously flawed as a person to end up this way. This whole behaviour has instilled so much fear in me about sharing any details about my age and relationship status coz it always leads to me feeling ashamed or humiliated in some or the other way.
It feels as if society, especially women refuse to treat you as a respectable and whole human being just because you are a single woman.

[@renticat]

I wish i can afford to be single. I want it but it's hard and yeah i want someone to love me so that i take care of them back but mostly it's financial things that hold power so my status is so low. My life is not easy rn :( no one to help

[@amohammed5]

Thanks. I wish more ppl would understand thay being single is not a bad thing. I'm in my late 30s. I refuse to settle. I believe in personal growth and enjoying life. The partner worth a lifetime will organically show up.

[@efe3097]

Very true. I'm in my late 30s too . Single and have no child.I have refused to settle and I have no regrets because I know deep down that I haven't met the right person.

[@TH-eb5ro]

Don't choose history over happiness, damn. Teach children healthy relationship patterns because many of us bring this to our adult lives. Many adult women want to be 'friends' with that person that they have already learned is not a good partner, let them go, that is a lesson, not a friend and certainly not a partner.

[@yourstruly1984]

Thank you !

[@Stephintojoy]

Just realized this... Perfect words... That's a lesson, not a friend. 🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾

[@dimplesp4046]

Amen say it again! 👏🏾👏🏾

[@slimgrande4666]

I went and purchased the book. I must say this is the only book that made sense. It just clicked. Most relationships don’t work because we haven’t found our true identity once you know who you are , I promise you will not entertain just anything.

[@user-mb9jx5tx9y]

This was for me. I thought I knew who I was and what I wanted but I clearly didn’t when I was seeing someone who had many red flags

[@dotendit]

But there are always things you're unconscious about. This lady in the video has been married for 2 years only and engaged after 6 months if I remember correctly. Besides kids complicate things, as to stress levels. I agree with many things she says but nothing saves you from your fate - the things you haven't yet realized.

[@indigohelps7715]

The fact that he didn’t have a suit and that was the reason for the rejection is so powerful … it’s like we can internalize rejection for so many years, being depressed, and in all honesty, the reason had nothing to do with us. Whew, a word 🤧

[@megamoneyk]

You would be surprised how many relationships do not start with love. They start with fear and desperation.

[@ljm7161]

Love isn't enough

[@tinker2217]

This turned out to be better than I expected. Being in a 22 year marriage, I can attest to everything that was said in this interview. And now heading for divorce, I'll definitely be buying the book to help me on my new journey going forward. 💞

[@Connect_with_Yourself]

How do you feel mentally and emotionally after departing from your ex after 22 years? Please describe your emotions. Gosh I can't imagine how you feel

[@dragonfish888]

I just finished the audiobook, and it just showed me that I didn’t “qualify” my past relationships. I should have been more discerning, and I know what I’m looking for now. This was a great book.
What you’re going through is the hard part. There is peace on the other side. Stay strong and good luck to you! 🙏🏼💕

[@nalionap9256]

P

[@nalionap9256]

Ppppp

[@nalionap9256]

Pp

[@Medabrown1985]

This was absolutely a eye opener. "Preparation is never Time wasted ".

[@maifolau6996]

Yes yes

[@singthelemur5211]

"I cannot be a cynic about love and attract it into my life at the same time." This I need to absorb.

[@lalasng8643]

Me too

[@maggysday]

"Sometimes you will have to walk away from people that you love. Hard truth but you gotta do it."
Omg almost brought me to tears... I expercienced it in the past and I feel like I am again delaying it right now. That is the toughest thing ever.

[@bundlewade]

"I realized that fear wasn't serving me...it was poisoning my perspective. And I didn't want someone new in my life to pay the price for something they had nothing to do with in my past." - Faith Jenkins
This has to be one of my favorite parts of this interview.
We are hurt when people break some of our core values. I've been healing from a kind ghosting situation that hurt me more than it should have. And I'm realizing this person broke some of my core values: honesty, kindness, genuine care for the other person, integrity. It turned out there was a huge disconnect between what he said he wanted (to get to know me, to spend time in person, to have others get to know him deeply) and what he actually did.

[@alexandria9447]

Wow, are you me? I’m in the same situation. I experienced this guy ghosting me and it really struck a cord with me. Like I felt like my inner compass was skewed as I didn’t see it coming and I thought we were on the same page. It made me lose trust in myself.
Anyways, that’s a good way to look at it, he didn’t share the same core values as me, as how he treated me proved that. How poorly they treat us has little to no reflection of our true worth. Thanks for sharing. And Good luck♥️

[@starlightwhispers6781]

And moving forward, this shouldn't be the diving board for you to use the pain on a new person

[@purplereignsupreme6990]

This is really good info. It's so true that women especially put pressure on each other with "why don't you have a man? Why aren't you married? kids? When you go on dates men sometimes ask this to say what's wrong with you? You have to know your own worth and not be pushed by these societal stressors.

[@user-cl6uj5bn2f]

AMEN 💯

[@yokebreaker7675]

When she said, “People don’t really have relationship problems they have problems they bring into the relationship.” Wow just wow…so true!🙏🏾❤️💪🏾

[@tormel8203]

"It can't... as long as you remain." Facts. When a person continuously disrespects you, you must get out to fully see and fully heal.

[@Katfashiondesigner]

Wait a minute... she said she is over 40 years old? Both of you look like in your 20s
And yes sis, let's not settle for good enough, we must know our worth, we are far more precious than rubies, a woman who fears the Lord is worthy to be praised. Seek the Lord, tap into the best version of yourself, rebuild yourself from scratch and design your dream life, it is about the power of the right Mental perspective and heart posture, enjoy life, shift some habits for the better, decide to be joyful. Blessings

[@cloverstylez]

I like this comment. Thx for sharing :)

[@dawn2166]

Wow!!! Amen to that...very well said👍

[@audreymarshall1474]

Amen 🙏🏽

[@kisaswirlpearl2974]

Yes, she sure does look very young, and I believe it has something to do with being singled while living free from day to day stress.

[@jazmin8464]

Giving someone too many chances goes against your intuition. Shutting your intuition for so long weakens the voice of reason and then making decisions becomes even harder. Confusion takes over

[@beverlythomas902]

She is so correct because I’ve dated 4 men throughout my dating life and 2 of those men brought their problems into the relationship. I can truly relate to that statement.

[@brendapolar8506]

Girl!! “I could not look to someone else to make me happy” “If i look to someone to make me happy then I am giving them the power to make me sad” Amazing!! Have been single for over 3 years by choice. Not looking either. Am loving me and my life like never before. When it happens for me, it will be from such a deep feeling of self love and most certainly not settling ever again. Stay strong in your own love and light ladies!!💜

[@kindgurly1]

This interview was really worth the 52 minutes. And Lisa's excitement when she hears something that resonates with her is just fun to watch. :D

[@TheOrignalTRockz]

Love it, when people don’t get why someone is single. Best answer: Because I am not in a relationship unless I am really in love and it adds happiness to my life. I love my freedom and am not willing to compromise for anything less than the real thing. If it feels like a compromise, it’s wrong. Not one of those people who need to be in a relationship to feel complete.
„Why are you not married?“ „Why should I? For what would I need that?“ Turn the question on them. If they don’t stop: „How many really happy marriages do you know? I‘ve been to the weddings and the divorce parties - my happiness is in the best hands - in mine.“ (wink, smile & off you go, leaving them flabbergasted)

[@ecclairmayo4153]

A lot of these folks are jealous. Misery needs company.

[@candacenia8280]

Loved this video. I am 26 years old and I can relate so much. The pressure from society and social media about relationships is at an all time high. Its very hard to be single these days and dating is really hard as well. I watch my friends date aimlessly and all I see is them wearing themselves down with men who are most likely not going to be in a relationship with let alone marry them. I am currently working on my self and being honest about the damage i still have In my heart from my child’s father 5 years ago. I left my child’s father because he was abusive when i got pregnant and I will never look back. Ladies there is nothing wrong with being single its not worth it to be with someone who makes you miserable. Be strong and love yourself first ❤️

[@Paola01.]

She said, “getting married after 40yrs old”. Wow, she look 28yrs old. Amazing .

[@jaclynlee6386]

I think she’s around 45…beautiful woman

[@apilotnamedsiren4808]

Lisa Bilyeu has a talent for gracefully communicating with anyone. Excellent conversation ladies!

[@marawashington3280]

This was so needed for me. Walked away from a relationship where he said one thing but his actions were so different. Time waits for no one and I realized that it was okay for me to walk away and walk away proudly. Dating after 40 is not easy but I know my soul partner is out there. I remain hopeful. 38:03 is my life. It’s rather exhausting but she hit the nail on the head about internalizing it, which I will not do anymore.

[@tbh_thebrand]

I have been working on myself for 3yrs and this interview right here changed my life man. The calmness the way she broke things down. Just the clarity just so many things. God I’m so thankful for this video ♥️🙏🏽

[@nw0913]

This hit home with me.. I've seen this happen to my mom who has always settled with terrible men. Each one was worse than the last and she is 45 now and has done nothing with her life,she lives with my grandmom because she doesn't have a home and moved to Florida while leaving her bf in philly who is the biggest piece of garbage and yet she still can't let him go after 9 years of his abuse. She herself even became abusive back and I would tell her to leave him and move on because she is so beautiful, capable of doing anythi she sets her mind to and has such a big heart and her response to me was no man is going to want me at this age .. so she prefers to settle because she thinks after 9 years she can have him.. and he's only gotten worse and is so vindictive and hurts her out of spite.. yet she finds an excuse to excuse his behavior.. it hurts me so much because that relationship she has pushed me away because she has defended him over her own daughter so I chose to back off.. you can't help someone who doesn't want to be helped.. I hurt myself in the process trying to save her from these trash men .. so I had to let go for my own sake because I would lose sleep over it and cry and even feel resentment towards both of them and even anxiety became a huge problem. Over the years I hadn't realized that watching her settle made me the same way and I would settle with garbage men until one truly hurt me so bad I still have ptsd from his abuse... I was luck to gain the strength to leave and I have now truly found my equal and he isn't perfect but he is by far the best man ive ever met who respects me and loves me like mo other has. My advice for those stuck.. listen to this woman. . She is on point withher advice.

[@bsmiles7933]

I’m 40 and witnessed the similar type of situation. The best thing to do is to forgive yourself and learn from your experiences and make decisions that won’t trap you (be self-sufficient).

[@amarisrania1585]

I was in an abusive relationship for about 4 years.
These relationships are so much harder to leave then normal relationships. Trauma boding, love bombing, gas lighting, manipulation, coercive control and isolation are very real and extremely difficult to break free.
Hang in there and be there for her when she needs you, in truth she needs support and goodness in her life more than anything right now. Remember he will probably do his best to keep you away and it even seem to come from her.
Take care of yourself and stay strong for her.

[@kw9633]

Brave of you for sharing and thank you for being vulnerable with us🤗✨ highly appreciated and I'm happy you got out of the cycle and is now happy and at peace✨🦋 Many continuous blessings on this life journey and your love journey 💖✨😇

[@missdesireindependance5194]

The only thing you can do is give her emotional support. She will learn the hard way!

[@Violets14]

I'm sorry you have had to watch your mom go through this. Maybe she'll see how your relationship is healthier or maybe if she sees other healthy relationships, she can realize she can have the same thing or be inspired.

[@ah3738]

Oh wow. This really resonates. Just turned 40...single... this is so great to remind me that there is nothing bad about that 😊⭐ thank you for sharing the wisdom.

[@AAPAI_24]

this is where the fun begins...:-)

[@priscilalondon]

It would be worse if at 40 you realized you wasted your life with someone who doesn’t give a rat’s ass about you, which is what I am going through now.

[@Oli_Cirillo]

Me too girl! I’m 40, divorced, and I have 2 kids. I was with my ex for 22 years… and now I feel like I have a second lifetime to live ! I’m financially independent, I have an amazing career and my kids are healthy and happy🙏🏼Life is great, and if I meet someone great, if I don’t , also great! I literally wake up every day feeling like I’ve won the lotto of life! I’m dating and enjoying every minute I am healthy and alive in this human experience! Sometimes we forget how short life is … and this will all end one day! GO LIVE YOUR LIFE ladies! ♥️🙌🏻

[@mariejae]

I'm not embarrassed about being single at all. Just tired of attracting adult babies who want you to be their free maid or momma. They lie, lie, lie until they want you to start taking care of them. I've been the happiest single because I can't seem to trust a guy - they always have an ulterior motive that they never bring up in the beginning.

[@rcmkennel9399]

you attract what you are. Isolate

[@Future88746]

@@rcmkennel9399 not necessarily

[@Jamjar-iu3ji]

@@rcmkennel9399 did Princess Diana attract Charles too?

[@NoName-sp5dp]

​@@rcmkennel9399 sounds like men victim blaming women

[@Sgb-oq3oy]

Modern people like to refer to the 50's as a terrible time to return to. I am not suggesting that. But many lessons could be learned from studying the 50's. I don't have to study it. I lived it. I married my wife when she was 22 years old. I was 28. This was before the sexual revolution and the birth control pill, each of which changed the sexual behavior of both males and females. Both of us had college degrees and the hook up culture hadn't invaded the colleges yet. There was much more abstinence back then because of the fear of pregnancy and when abortions had to be of the back alley type. I didn't date her until we both graduated. We dated for a year and a half and I got to know her well enough to want spend the rest of my life with her. It will be 60 years of marriage this year. How many modern couples are going to make it that long?
To get regular sex a man had to get married in those days. That was a huge difference with that generation and modern generations. Moving in before marriage was frowned on by family and that also controlled the behavior. For me, it is disrespectful for a man to move in or have her move in. In a sense he is getting something for nothing and it isn't permanent. It is using the woman. The ring makes a difference.
The culture has gotten so bad in these days and times that marriage itself is becoming doubtful. Before the pill, both males and females accepted delayed gratification. Today you can be satisfied on the first date - sexually speaking. Carrying a wife over the threshold and to the bed was something to look forward to. Today there is not much to look forward to. Married people have more and better sex. That is what is being sacrificed today.

[@whitneyphilis]

Rebuilding is the worst. Don't do it❌ you will only end up getting hurt cause people do not change for you but for themselves. I truly enjoyed watching. Thank you for sharing this💜

[@ProductiveChi]

People need to have relationships with themselves and really love themselves, heal from any hurt or trauma you've been through, before getting into a relationship. You always have to love yourself more than you love your partner. Too many people bringing in their emotional baggage and expecting their partner to fill all the voids in their life.

[@bellebeaute]

Judge Faith Jenkins looks amazing to be in her 40's. She looks like she is still in her 20's like me! I love that God fulfilled His plans for her, love, marriage, and now pregnancy! I am inspired that she decided she was worth the wait! Loved this interview. 💖

[@godschild163]

She was men free lol

[@therealtrinsetter]

When she talked about choosing to rebuild someone. I am definitely guilty of that. I am 20 but my life and my circumstances forced me to grow up faster than most. As a result , I was forcing my ex to catch up with me on the maturity and development scale 🤦🏾‍♀️ I do feel bad but I was also able to accept the fact that our timings in adulthood were different

[@sweetie69ish]

I am going through a bad break up, I really needed to hear this 🙏

[@Zelicious11]

Sending you hugs, love & peace!💖🌺

[@aneesanabi6512]

Me too

[@AM-jj9wt]

I pray you find peace

[@Gigi-rg7xy]

Sending you hugs ! I’m also there. 2 months and he’s dating someone already. A month after the breakup. It hurts. 😔

[@saraforutan]

Same…

[@rocioh3667]

I'm not even half way yet.....This woman is ripping me open.....Speaking and shaking my soul....and sewing me back together....Faith...this Mexican girl needs more of you Girl!!! Your intelligence, communication and passion are off the hook

[@MissMadelineMM94]

I met a guy who is 'the total package' but there was just no attraction on my side and i knew being with him would be settling and I had to get the strength to walk away in faith that God will bring me my King.

[@ellie9030]

I broke up with all my partners because of it and my parents called me out for being spoiled. I don't know, maybe? Surely I know I don't want to die spiritually in my early 20s and find myself in weird marketing lifestyle niches. You guys know which niches I mean...

[@Goethe2andFro]

"No one was gonna put pressure on me to move faster because they thought I needed to be on some kinda timeline." 👏👏👏

[@BaileyBlurbs]

I just ordered Sis Don’t Settle. I’m at the tail end of a 2-year relationship at 28 and it has exhausted and depressed me and made me lose confidence in who I am. 2 years too long. This is the advice I’ve been SEARCHING for, for so long. This is powerful and life changing. I can’t wait to read your book Judge Jenkins.

[@user-sc9pn3tq4y]

I’m 28 as well! I hope you’re doing well and working on that confidence. We deserve to feel good after a draining relationship, I wish you the best ❤️

[@PaolaHuezo]

I’ll be 28 in October, im in one right now and it’s hard, I been wanting to break up, but idk how to go about it since he lives with me. It just the guilt and me feeling bad, but I know that’s my own problem that I’m not putting myself first in this situation.

[@ronjakh]

Good for you for getting out! You’re still so young and you have all the time to find someone who will appreciate you, or simply end up learning how to appreciate yourself again. Which is a more than good enough ever after 🙏🏻

[@ChimangoMwandira]

Leave 😅 before you waste another year

[@yali4954]

im also 28 and after nearly 3 years of sadness and overcompensating, i feel like im done.

[@vickiortega8034]

I always see people so desperate to be with someone that they try to force themselves to stay together when really they can't stand each other. They waste so many years. I'm guilty as well.

[@jerrygodleads9772]

How people treat others when things are not going well is their true nature. This is so true. This conversation is so insightful. Most of my relationships don't end on a good note. It's really not healthy for me. Sometimes you gotta walk away from people you love. This is so hard. I am happiest when I'm happy with someone. I try so much to be happy alone and it works. But the happiness I experience when in love and loved back is second to non. So when things start going south I get deeply affected. How do I really get so happy alone like I am when I'm in love?

[@josephsunfalcon479]

@jerry Godleads stop placing your happiness in someone's hands. This is why there's are so many unfulfilled relationships out here because people rush into relationships to feel loved and wanted. You can't be with someone to complete you. You find the right one that will compliment you. You must do the the job of filling up those holes that you may be seeking someone else to do. Work on making yourself happy and fulfilled and the right one will come along to add onto the happiness that exists within you. We will never know of wholeness until we fulfill ourselves. Sometimes it requires taking that spiritual journey with the Creator and unpack all the stuff inside ourselves.

[@mariaakopyan-dignifieddivo5694]

As a divorce attorney and coach, I can really relate to this video in so many ways. Her story is so much like mine! This video gave me permission to share of my story too since I had to learn how to show up in relationships in a healthy way so that I could finally be in a committed marriage (which I am now). Thank you for this interview!

[@Ketg225]

Faith seems so sorted and balanced. Such an inspirational talk. Lisa, I love your questions. Please get more guests who can inspire single women.

[@jacquelinebarnesjohnson136]

Yes I believe Rejection is God's protection ! I been in a marriage that was not a good . So I will not settle or let someone mistreat me ever again . I know my worth either except me or move on out the way for what God has for me ..

[@nadiadansani2139]

“It’s easy to fall in love, but it takes work to stay there”

[@shunjay2978]

I think she is telling a lot of our stories. And it’s refreshing to get a perspective from a woman who is supposed to be the “whole package.”

[@vivianmcben1644]

I refuse to settle.
I know I can be better, i know i can be more.
I and my future partner deserve the best of me, hence i will work towards healing my past traumas and letting g go of the fears that restrain me.
I'm ready🕊