Steven Seagal Maximum Conviction - He & Stone Cold Ruin A Movie Together - Worst Movie Ever
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- Опубліковано 4 лют 2025
- The Steven Seagal movie Maximum Conviction with Stone Cold Steve Austin and Steven Seagal is so insufferable that it thinks people actually care about its annoying kids or anything that happens in their stupid little lives. If they win an MMA tournament or get hit by a bus, then maybe people will pretend to care, but otherwise there's no reason anyone needs to know they even exist.
#stevenseagal #badmovies #worstmovies #actionmovies
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Please do the Gary Busey movie Bulletproof. It's hilarious. His catchphrase is calling bad guys "butthorn." 😂😂😂😂
Maybe a collab with the Sensei Segal channel?
I could see you two playing off each other very well.
Thank you SO MUCH for another gem!!!!!
HahahahahahahahJjH
It’s time to do a Liam Nelson movie start with “Ice Road”
He's probably the only person who did more movies out of his prime than in it.
What about Bruce Willis?
His prime was like 2 seconds.
@@planebreach Even in that brief window he was a defective store brand version of Stallone.
He never had a prime, TBH.
@@mikoajryniak2644Bruce had a long prime. Stop it
"Maximum Conviction" is what Steve should receive from a judge.
It does sound like that double secret probation stuff in Animal House now that I think about it
HOLY FUCK FDHSAFKJHDKJH
@@bigbearkat2010 Haha. "You are not just convicted, you are maximum convicted!"
Stephan Seagull.
steve seagal or steve austin?
Every Steven Seagal movie in a nutshell:
-Steven Seagal is either ex special forces or ex CIA or ex something
-Everyone treats Seagal like the second coming of Christ
-Steven Seagal will mumble his way through scenes or require the use of voice overs from other actors
-Body doubles who do everything which includes walking, standing, and fighting
-Lots of plot convenience
-Steven Seagal will be portrayed as a hero but commits tons of crimes
-Seagal will hook up with women younger than him
-Multiple plot threads that go nowhere or are completely abandoned by the end of the movie
-Whenever Seagal does fight, he’s either slap fighting or fighting sitting down and never has to reload
-Fight scenes will have plenty of shaky cam or jump cuts to hide Seagal’s weight or his stunt doubles
-Every Seagal film is either set in Eastern Europe, Mexico, or Asia
-Steven Seagal will always go to strip club even if it doesn’t contribute to the plot
-Plots will usually resolve themselves in the first 20 minutes
-Terrible special effects and green screen
-Seagal will never hold a gun correctly
-Whenever Seagal is in a team, everyone will either die or do nothing while he does all the work
-One liners and jokes that fall flatter than Seagal’s “acting career”
-The DEA apparently has jurisdiction over everything
-Seagal will also have a family that’s introduced at the end of the movie
Gotta frequent that strip club!
@@maidak Shit you beat me to it
He also talks his way out of anything, even when getting arrested by the police. Either the CIA gets him out of a foreign country the moment he'd be locked up for life or he has such a BS compelling reason the chief lets him go so he can continue his warcrimes.
Thats syphilis.
This time, there was no leather clad love interest or leather clad Seagal in this movie.
"A much thinner man, stole his luggage" omg, im dying laughing so hard at that scene
"And then Seagall, who definitely only has one chin."😂😂😂
@@dennislaskowski3773 shows up... [while an Aeon Flux soundtrack plays]
"A giant egg shaped man... Top egg..."
When Space Ice is off to a gold standard start.
A Seagal movie without a scene in a strip club is like an all you can eat buffet without Seagal at the front of the line.
Fuck he loves his cookies
At least we’re spared the strippers remarking about how enormous his tadger is. And how he’s the best they’ve ever had. Just don’t let him get on top!
@RealStevenSeagal What does it take? What does it take to change the essence of a man...'s ranch dip?
@RealStevenSeagal I need time to change...the essence of my ranch dip.
@RealStevenSeagal I'm gonna take *you* to the bank, Mr Seagal. The food bank.
I worked with a guy who liked Steven Seagal movies unironically. We watched this on a night shift and he was right into it. It was the weirdest thing ever.
What was this guy like???
@@machida58 he was like I’ve been watching seagal films for the last 35 years.
I served with a guy in the NAVY who absolutely loved 80's "B" movies. Every conversation would end up with him telling everyone about Rawhead Rex, Killer Clowns from Outer Space and a number of others. Almost one dimensional but still a good guy.
Some people just really like things that suck. People who watch shit like The Room unironically and somehow find this weird hidden meaning behind everything.
Steven Segal movies RULE!!!!
“Double chop.”
I cant stop crying with laughter.
"followed up by Irish dance kick"
Chop chop
@@ezetI laughed so hard.
Right up there with "...holy shit, Red-face!"
Double chop and Irish dance kick was hilarious!
"Who definitely only has one chin" stooop it 😂😂😂
The thumbnail 😂
"now that he's top Egg" 😂😂😂 this channel is a gem
My greatest fear is the day Space Ice runs out of Seagal films. I need sensei Steven to pump out some direct to streaming crap quickly.
I just want him to redo all of them, but from the perspective that Seagal is the movie's villain.
Steven would do a action movie in a wheelchair, killing everyone!
Well he kind of is vilain i mean look from ppl perspective who spends their time in favorite bar and segul shows and for no reason at all he starts beat the crap out of those poor guys
Fear not, I just saw a really crappy movie called Wifelike. It’s main character is an actor who is giving Sensei Seagal a run for his money in creepiness. Jonathan Rhys Meyers. He has to have the ugliest smile in show business.
@@cptcurk192He’s still gonna run out of movies because it seems like Seagal has retired
The next step in Steven Seagal's career is to play the bad guy in a Neil Breen movie.
I think trying to put together a video of a Segal/Breen movie would quite literally make Space’s head explode. I don’t think the world could handle that duo.
Neil is too thrifty and Seagal too greedy.
@@markiangooleyPlus Neil has standards
While uwe boll directs the movie
Throw in Tommy Wiseau. Lol
Petition to get Space Ice to cover China Salesman
Signed
Signed
Signed
And all of Seagal's early movies, like Nico or Hard To Kill.
I will have my body double sign it.
I love how UA-cam puts this movie right at the top of the video’s suggestions of what “to buy or rent”.
5:34 "Listen to me. Do what I say and I kill you before they kill you." What a deal.
We badly need a Steven Seagal video game where you play as Seagal and the entire thing takes place with him sitting in a chair. Not that the entire game takes place in one place; you go all over but everywhere you go Steven is still in a chair.
To go up any amount of stairs, you have to enter "stunt double mode."
@@TerrenceNowicki *Enter some guy who is 100 lbs lighter than Seagal but dressed like him
You collect sexual assault powerups throughout the game until you get to the bonus stage where you are a clown on Russian state television
That would be better than watching him run like a bitch!
You can only save the game by going to the strip club
Stone Cold is the only actor in a Segal film to practice proper trigger discipline. No way he gets asked back
That's because he hunts IRL with his brother.
Watching Steven try and hold guns in his movie is fucking hilarious, cause irl he thinks he's a weapons expert.
😂😂
@@maxbracegirdle9990 Not only is he a weapons expert, but he's also the world's top expert at fiddling around with nuclear weapons.
@@abousono1 And the world's top expert in fiddling around with young babes.
Seagal is the type of person who would enter a children's school race, win and then declare himself the fastest athlete in the world.
Nah. No way in hell he'd win
He would win by stomping their legs at the start line
This comment made me suffocate
he is like eric cartman lol . bigest possible evil pathetic individual
@@dopesickdoghis body double would 😂
“They say ‘no’, which he takes as ‘yes’.”
Classic Seagal! 😅
Dude your sense of comedy is freaking amazing man... Keep it up. It's HILARIOUS
Steven's uncanny ability to act like he's not acting is unmatched in all of cinema. It's incredible to watch.
i know right its like hes not even trying, a master at work
"Acting without acting"
He just plays himself in all his movies, so he's not even required to act.
He's literally just playing out his own fantasies. These stories have surely been writing themselves in his head since he was 8 years old.
@@joshdoldersum9132 Most likely.
Adding Stone Cold to this movie is like multiplying the result of your equation by 0.
The amount of actors, that I like, that had to play opposite Seagal blows my mind. I get it on paycheck and everything, but still hurts to see it sometimes. At the same time...comedy gold?
Austin, Michael Jai White, Louis Fan, etc. I know Austin isn't a premier actor, but I still like the man.
Hahaha I laughed out loud
@@MikadoYumaI think it's probably his health issue preventing him for working, he broke his neck if I'm not mistaken.
Man, I loved that Stone Cold movie as a kid.
@@MikadoYuma well once you are that popular its hard to shake off that image, the rock was able to do it because that guy is driven like crazy and had to really work for it and same i see for cena, maybe austin just wanted to chill and enjoy his later years....batista was never really that popularto begin with...theres super stardom..and then there is mega stardom
Imagine you are an actor playing combat roles and you are so out of shape that you need a stunt man if the role youre playing requires you to move slightly faster than walking speed, but instead of getting your shit together you just accept it and have your characters sit around a lot from now on. The balls on this guy, what an absolute legend. Sure being a "movie star" is fun, but so is eating.
Don't forget a body double for sitting around
And covering up that second and third chin
- im sure segal says “F-that” im re-writing this script
Waddling speed not walking speed
@@cptrelentless80085 You guys are funny as fuck. I'm throwing up-votes around
like confetti.
That "Just kidding, double chop" got me good 11:31
That is also my favorite line.
My kid turned me on to your work and I have been binge-watching it for days now. I am on board for the duration of this adventure.
"Which really brightens his mood...just kidding.. DOUBLE CHOP!"
You killed it on this one.
Seagal is the only 70 year old, 300 pound man in the world to wear a cap backwards.
To be fair, he was 'only' 60 years old when this movie came out.
I’ve been to Walmart. You’d be wrong
@@steveaustin4013hey Steve, gotta say, you were my favorite character in that movie xD
Steve’s urban , you can’t tell ?😅
That’s just his dyed hair bro
“Maximum conviction is the Steven Segal mega blockbuster hit movie where he showed the world the only thing holding him back from being a major acting star is talent, work ethic, intelligence, ability, self awareness, attractiveness, basic human decency, you know what everything, literally everything.”
“He got word that a giant egg shaped man was randomly attacking innocent people which is his role mfkr”
He'll do him an egg.
This nearly killed me, ok, now I have to be on medication!
@@Eddie-j3s6e
Lmao there isn’t usually a video I’m laughing 15 seconds in except Space Ice 😂😂
He was handsome in hard to kill
@@thethedeanshow
You sure that wasn’t his body double? 😂
"Followed by an Irish dance kick..." that one had me rolling
Steven Seagal as the next John Wick villain. No I'm not high, you don't have any proof of that.
Damn, Seagal has hundreds of "mega blockbuster hit movies" at this point in his career! A true icon of acting.
Steven Segul is the equivalent of "I beat up some weak people, I'm the greatest fighter who ever lived"
The Logan Paul way
More like “If my body double did it, that really means I did it.”
Fun fact: There’s this guy who actually did that shit in real life. His name is Charlie Zelenoff, aka “the P4P goat”. Look him up, and you’ll see what I mean.
He believes too much in his past glory (when the world was a different place). Now it's ridiculous. 4:46
And be dumb enough to think he can take on Gene LeBell.
I love how Austin the professional "fake" fighter is way more believable in fight scenes than Segall the "real" fighter
SA has to make it look good. He works at it. SS hears the word ‘work’, and immediately calls for a stunt double. Doesn’t need a stunt double for the heavy fork-lifting, though.
wrestling takes actual charisma and athleticism lol.
@@yuzucryptUp until the last few years, yes it did
Shut up you take that back wrestling is real you just gotta believe
@@denny414 It really isn't or ever has been a case of real or fake imo
I'm paraphrasing Jim Cornette here but why has Brock Lesnar always been a big deal with very few detractors? It's because fans have always wanted to believe on a deep down level and Lesnar has always given that vibe, weither you liked or disliked him. Heck, I 80% knew it was scripted by the time I was 9 but people like Harley Race gave you the same vibe back then.
You made me choke on water when you said “The Seagal, who definitely only has one chin...:” 😂
"Spiderman and dipshit..." are the best duo ever 😂😂😂
Not even ‘Stone Cold’ Steve Austin can save this movie! That’s how you know it’s fucked.
That's like saying "even a band-aid can't save this eviscerated man" - Steve's OK, but he isn't exactly a beacon of charisma or a good actor.
@@ser6IjvolkThat’s true Steve is like The Rock, charismatic but more in his presence than personal talent. Fairly one-dimensional in their characters, but very entertaining when given the right role. They’d never be considered anything more then decent actors at best, but that puts them much higher then Seagall on a good day. As at least they have the self-awareness and experience to know where they rank.
There was only one American 'wrestler' whose presence brought true sophistication to the screen, a Steve is no Hulk Hogan 🧐
@@ursinecanine9657 good sarcasm
Austin can't act either way
His dedication to his delusion is immeasurable
Well I mean he is getting paid, so there's that.
A legend in his own mind
This channel is criminally underrated.
DOUBLE CHOP!
Yea I dont understand why he doesnt have like a million subs. It’s hilarious.
CRIMINALLY underrated, easily one of the funniest reviewers on YT
Dude you are a friggen legend. I never laughed so hard 😂😂 “f*** that orphanage!”
Just now finding this channel. I don't know whats funnier. The Seagal or Niel Breen vids
This had me dying on the floor 😂😂😂😂 “Rock’en Sock’em Segal” lmao
Glad you got around to this and took it easy on me - I did about 90% of the Visual Effects in this movie 11 years ago (including the greenscreen shot used in the thumbnail).
Did you meet Seagal himself, or did he send his body double?
@@Illustraful I worked in the post-production on the film so never saw him. I heard he came to the studio once to ADR some lines but was late and rushed through it. Austin was a pro though.
@@aylmer666 I'm amazed he turned up to do any ADR. I crack up at clips of his movies where he was too lazy to do his own ADR and they got a guy who sounds nothing like him.
@@aylmer666He was running late getting to a strip club to hit on underaged girls, I would imagine. That's why Seagal rushes through everything.
You doin Gods work son, nobody wanta to work with that ass seagal🎉
Was drinking coffee when you dropped that "Just kidding! Double Chop!" What a catastrophic situation that was.
That's why I always pause a Space Ice video before drinking.
Seagal is criminally underrated. He really should be on everyone's Top 10 Pound for Pound Comedian list.
Emphasis on the Pound for Pound.
Thanks a lot, man. I spat out my water reading this.
I actually went back to watch some of these movies. Your commentary is totally on point. You don't skip a beat! Keep it up Space Ice!!!
I always feel kinda bad for Seagal. He lives his life having to pay everyone to tell him how awesome he is and makes movies out of this to convince himself that he is what he desperately imagines himself to be. A sexy, dangerous, mysterious man that no woman can pin down for long... It is pathetic because in the end these fantasies just alienates him from improving in any way possible, both in art and in real life
It's self-inflicted and he has made money and probably had fun doing these things so difficult to feel bad for him. Especially now that he's joined Putin's propaganda machine.
What's funny is he probably could have made good money off the image he had in his prime but due to his narcissism he's just a joke now
@IStevenSeagalexactly what I was thinking. He’s the Adam Sandler but for action flicks. I’m sure other countries love him
@IStevenSeagalyou’re a smart dude. All these people, asides the witty trolls and positives are really miserable
He’s a genuinely terrible person. Don’t ever feel bad for him
I'm always baffled by how Space Ice keeps finding new ways to roast Steven Seagal within each video
"Now that he is top egg" made me laugh harder than it probably should have 😅
I heard that mother fucker birthday!
One episode he said "but then, Steven Segal did something that blew away both of his fans" lol 😆
@@Jibb3rs LMFAO. Did he no-look corner shoot both fans? I guess that's more of an Alec Baldwin move.
@jasonbourne8245 Space Ice is peak UA-cam. This channel is one of the very best. I can't get enough of the scene where the guy falls through the skylight like a sack of potatoes. That's one of the funniest things I've ever seen.
@@willbohland3698 I think all he did was run like 5 steps lol 😆
These are gold. "Just kidding double chop" had me crying 😂
"Rock em sock em Seagal"! Pure poetry!
The “rifle in the wrong hand again” thing you were talking about is not a mistake, it’s a shooting technique usually used in CQB to keep yourself more behind cover if aiming / peaking out of both sides of cover.
It’s a technique almost no one uses because it requires you switch shooting eyes to aim down your sights as well. It’s more or less been proven as too slow and not worth doing. You’ll see it done in Professional paintball matches more than anywhere else.
Basically it’s Seagal trying to look tactical and cool😂
what is the explanation for the stock ABOVE his shoulder then? i mean, other than he being too fat to lean down and aim on the proper position
"Seagal expertly falls while his gun bounces around with pinpoint accuracy" 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Just kidding. Double chop followed by a n Irish dance kick.
That killed me😂
“If you want to catch a Seagal you have to become a Seagal” 😂 😂 😂
I lost it at "Less Black Seagal!" 😂 7:55
This movie is so bad after watching it with my wife she cleaned out our savings account and vanished
OH THE HORROR!!!!😱
She is probably sleeping with Seagal, don't worry, you ain't losing much.
I wouldn't worry about it too much. If she's ever found, you can take her to court aand stipulate the $2.50 she stole as her entitlement to the divorce.
If it was your idea to watch it, you deserve everything you had done to you...
@@BadTV1993😂😂😂
That Irish dance kick is amazing. Segal always coming up with fresh techniques.
I hope Seagal never stops pumping out bad movies. Dude is an absolute legend at being a lolcow in the action genre. Literally the gift that keeps giving 😂
According to IMDB he's coming out with a "sequel" to "Above the Law".
The chin that won't stop swingin
It's all a money laundering racket from his shady east european backers....
”To catch a Seagal you have to become a Seagal” 🤣
😂😂 I’m loving all the Seagal commentary videos. True classics 😆😆
The next time my kids act up: “You mad at us, Dad?”
Me: “Nope.” Double-chop. “Not anymore.”
Thanks for the inspiration Space Ice. Children everywhere are already on better behaviors.
Hilarious! 😂
I thought you were going to say "The next time my kids act up I'm making them watch this movie."
@@j3dwin that’s a good idea lol
@@Ender7jI'm reporting you to CPS if you make your kids watch any of his movies.
Stone cold steve austin broke his back carrying this movie and seagal
If only Seagal had his body double for those scenes too
@@bigbearkat2010
That little bitch, running away with Seagull's suitcase defibrillator. Absolutely shockingly unprofessional!
The “oh my god stop it” technique made me spit a lil bit of my beer out
This channel is making me want to watch all these Seagal movies
Seagal waddles better than Howard... I just now realized I need a Space Ice review of Howard the Duck.
Steve Austin is an incredibly captivating figure to watch. It's impossible to resist his charm.
WWE/WWF also enjoying record revenues lately. Same cannot be said for Seagal movies.
Get in the ring with him and you'll soon want to resist his charm!
@@taxidude You can't charm a Rattlesnake
I'd rather be shot in the balls for every movie he's made instead of watching them. You're doing the lord's work
he has made more than two movies. At this point you would be on a great ball deficit, greater than even the US credit financial deficit.
Are you a Krogan?
Bro thinks he's Senator Vernon Trent.
Seems a bit exaggerated 😂😂😂
We should start a petition to demand Steven Seagal make more crap movies, so Space Ice can review them. Vote up if you agree.
As much as I love Space Ice roasting Steven Seagal, I feel like an overload of Seagal movies might negatively affect Ice’s psyche.
@@nicholascauton9648 Good point! Let's start a second petition to crowdfund for Space Ice's therapy sessions....just in case!
"To catch a Seagal, you have to be a Seagal" lmaooo
"Just kidding...double chop!!!" Almost killed me😂😂😂
"The highest kick of his career.." lmfao 😂😂😂
Space Ice reviewing a Segal movie - perfect way to kick off my weekend.
If you want to catch a seagal you have to become a seagal had me rolling 😂
Bro, I am so glad I found this channel. Your commentary has me in stitches. I will be watching all of these. If I could subscribe twice I would.
Excellent as usual! How about the two guys that forgot they were in the movie and the two women who couldn't help beating each other every chance they got 😊. Remember how the one in as going to tell Segal her sad life story but no one wanted to hear it. It all too funny!
I can't believe he keeps making these movies, but I'm glad he does now, thanks to this channel.
Steven Seagal is so bad at acting, even the furniture in his movies overacts in comparison!
" double chop followed by an irish dance move" always quality commentry
You are making me want to do a weekend binge on Seagal movies! These are all amazing!
You’ve actually made me start watching his movies so I can see if I spot the insanity that you point out 😂
It never gets old ripping on Steven Seagal 🤣 thank you Space Ice.
The supporting roles moved more muscles in this movie than Seagal did in his entire career.
"Spiderman and Dipshit"
The sequel we all need.. ☠️
"Because it's Seagal, instead of a chip in her brain, it's in her boobs"
That laughing Seagal caught me. 😂
Steven Seagal is so bad that it almost seems like he is trolling everyone. It would be hilarious if he was just playing a character to see just how dumb he could get before being exposed lol.
I love the way you destroy Steven Seagal worst and he destroy his own movies. That’s impressive.
"Just kidding! Double chop!" That shit had me going😂
Did he say "I promise, I'll kill you before they kill you"?😂 Can't pass up that deal.
I need to watch the movie now to confirm if that is the actual line lol
Now while this guy tries to go through every possible 10 digit combination. 🤣🤣 Classic!!!
OMG i can't stop laughing
this video is so great
i love the description
... when Steve Austin realized whats wrong with the trash compactor LOOOOL
"Seagal who definitely only has one chin" took me out 💀
I did a marathon of your Steven Seagal - my life will never be the same again
Nor yours. It now belongs to Sugartits Seagal.
@@theultimatereductionist7592 Hahaha You said it - :(
Eating and harassing women are the only things sensei does with maximum conviction
Great video thank you, FOUL AF telling that cop to get his TV back
You know why Seagal's favourite move is the double chop? Cos that's what he eats for every single meal... breakfast, brunch, elevenses, lunch, tea, supper & dinner
sensei seagal never disappoints
🙏
To disappoint...
He's like the Neil Breen of action movies!
your videos have proven to cure depression.
hell, they saved my life twice!
'a giant egg shaped man randomly attacking innocent people '
Isn't That's just basically every Seagal movie since they went straight to video?
We all know Seagal is top egg
I've never seen a video of yours, and at first I thought your voice was kinda annoying. I quickly realized that it's the only way to narrate a Segal film. Kudos for watching this film.
"Seagal (who definetly only has ONE chin) shows up" 😂