Body language is so important. Keep your hands where people can see them. Ie. don’t put them in your pockets, behind your back or fold them. We trust people who’s hands we can see, and we find it easier to talk to people who don’t have their arms crossed in front of them.
Again, this is a speech worth looking at carefully. Right off the bat, the speaker tells us what he is going to say and takes his sweet time saying it. By the time he makes his point, the audience very much wants to know the punch line, having waited and waited to hear it. Then he repeats the key point several times, until we finally understand and hopefully, remember it. Perhaps objections could be overcome using a similar story telling strategy. When someone says "your product is too expensive", tell a story. I sell a product that is "too expensive". One story I like to tell is about the success of the company, based in part on our pricing strategy. Another story is about customers who saw the light about our costly product, after talking about those who bought lower quality stuff and regretted it.
I will be delivering a speech for my speech class soon. These videos have definitely helped me. I am understanding and taking notes as I go. I have two weeks left until I give my speech. Normally I am the nervous and shy type when being in front of crowds of people, but knowing all this information helps me think less of it and focus more on my speech.
I know this was 5 years ago 🫣 so you probably don't remember at this point, but on the off chance you do. Did your speech- or the feeling you had afterward- turn out how you'd hoped?
I understand your generosity Mr. Conor, In trying to show us around how to handle objections, but from the underlined wisdom and knowledge embedded in this video, how do you suggest we get rid of our old ways of stating a quick defense such as "No it's not" or an answer when faced in this kind of situation.
Thank you Conor, I have tried some of your methods at hostile meetings at work (competing work groups forced to work together to form new strategies) and it works. They respond much better then if I just give them the "our solution is better because *list of arguments*" :)
Even better is to ask them if you have understood their position. “Am I correct in assuming that price is a factor? Ok, good, what other factors..” “Are you saying that I’m not being appreciative enough?”
I sell for a living and done so very well for decades . I am also sold to buy salespeople and if they have this approach it won't work for me , when I ask a question I dont want a question posed I want an answer . This has overtones of evasiveness and gets me to think what else might he evade or obfuscate on ..... Also, If you get the price objection that late in the sales cycle you didnt qualify properly . You never go to the end cycle to find your price is too high ... Gather info and ask what budget set aside is for this early enough to know whether you're dealing with prospect or suspect ... Wanna know more hit me up here and I will tell you how I do it .
I call this A.I.O.A. This is where you ''Acknowledge and Isolate = ''I can appreciate you wanting to get the best bang for your buck, apart from that is there anything else holding you back?'' They will either give you another objection or tell you that's it. Then you Offer a solution and Ask again. ''Ok, I would hate for you to miss out on this opportunity so here's what I'm going to do for you, why don't we break this down into monthly payments...that way it's easier on your wallet and you still walk away happy, Do you want to put that on visa or mastercard?''
This classic answer a question with a question, but opening with a demonstration of your understanding of what they just said. More respectful and interestingly a key item of debate 101 to establish the stasis of the argument. The 4 other iterations of open questions, echoes 5 whys, which is classic kanban. Funny how different domains can lead to the same techniques.
@@ConorNeill 5 Whys is in Agile too, so a search will yield many good definitions. It has its critics since it sometimes leads to blaming people, so they mutate it to 5 Hows. Before this there was the Rational Manager who promoted the 5W1H of journalism (who, what, where, when, why and how). So in many domains questions can help, too many questions intimidate. But the attempt here is refined definition of the problem. What is usually missing is the opposite condition, that is, asking not only "what is it" but "what is it not" or "where is it" and "where is it not" because it is at these transitions where the actual definition resides.
So true... difficult to "reprogram" after all those years of conditioning in school. Thank you for these great analogies and your advice... brilliant 👍
so great! you put the problem so graspably into words! I love it. I love this subject. we even deliver 2 days workshops to train it. so I will defintely use the way you present the problem. thank you so mich
Have to be very careful with this. A few people around my workplace started saying "I understand what you are saying, but..." It was clear it was a conflict coping mechanism that they were falling back on, it dehumanised them and instantly makes me switch off seeing them as a sales person (all talk, no knowledge)
That's great, sir. Thank you for sharing your knowledge. I'm not a salesman (actually I work with data mining) but these skills you're talking about are very useful in a number of situations, even on personal life. You've got your subscriber more. :)
It is very interesting, but I don't see a clearly laid out criteria for the question that comes after the "I understand....". It needs to be open, right. but what's the goal of the question? Is it a proposition? Or only to understand the real feelings behind the other person's question? I believe the last question can use some more scripting.
A fantastic presentation, which combines a number of elements in an original synthesis. He's not the first to talk about communication aikido. He's not the first to talk about "blowing your lid" (flight, fight, freeze response)--see Dan Siegel for example. Nonetheless, this presentation puts a number of such no-so-novel elements together in an original way that makes an original point.
Me "This is called manipulation. Sociopaths use these techniques. It would be difficult to be this man's friend." Him: "I understand that you think I am a manipulative sociopath. What would you say if I could show you 5 ways we could be friends?"
"Murderers use guns, therefore everyone who uses a gun is a murderer" that is not a logical thought to have lol. Context and intentions make an action moral or immoral
SO YOU SAY I UNDERSTAND YOU SAY OUR PRODUCT IS TOO EXPENSIVE AND YOU HAVE SOME GOOD WORDS TO FILL IN ABOUT YOUR PRODUCT? IT GIVES YOU WHAT IS BEHIND THIS?
Wow! This is amazing. I can see the application in a presentation AND in interpersonal situations. Presently, I am confronted with responding to an objection and must confess, my initial response was old school. Thanks to you, I have a far more productive tool. This will require that I, "man up" and be prepared for the feedback...but I am willing.
Quite helpful. Answers dont really have to be this one "I understand, bla bla bla" but this is the direction. Strive to figure out which possible thoughts and feeling associated to the question itself. It's no an easy exercise for a 18 years programmed person.
TO ANSWERS QUESTIONS WE WERE TAUGHT TO ANSWER QUESTIONS? IN REAL LIFE IN GETTING TO OTHERS IS GIVE AN ANSWER TO QUESTIONS? GIVING AN ANSWER IS NOT THEIR REAL ISSUE IS BECAUSE THERE IS AN EMOTIONAL REACTION SO PRACTICE HOW YOU WILL RESPOND BECAUSE YOU NEED TO SAY I UNDERSTAND AND REPEAT AND GIVE AN OPEN QUESTION BACK?
Nakuona kmaa umechsnganyikiwaa na ushapewa yangu yote kmaa siwezi tena kubali ww naww ati waona mm nakutakaa sababuu brother wakoo buuu shirt😜😜😜😜😜👊👊👊👊👊👊👊👊khaalaass
I have a question. ..what if that person just throw it straight back at u.. what do you understand? You understand nothing. ...how should we respond to that please. ..thankyou
very educational, These are some of relevant tools I can use in my job, dealing with objection is something we deal in our daily life, and sometimes answers are never there for you, but this puts it so simple, Thank you for your brilliant advice. Mr Neil
Tem sido muito importante para mim assistir a seus vídeos. Eles realmente têm me ajudado muito a compreender as questões abordadas e isso me torna mais seguro quando tenho que desempenhar meu trabalho. Sou-lhe eternamente grato. Continue assim, pois você tem ajudado muitas pessoas.
it is hard to change a habbit , I watchef this vedio 5 times I agree with the concept but when I face similar situation I counsiously reply by either defense or question now Sir I would like your advise what is the best way to get rid of such habit
Excelent perpestive. Sometime ago a customer told me "your service is expensive", I responded him, yes it is. But my service likely has other values than other proposal do not have... and I explain why. First thing I do when I meet a customer is tell him, I want to be part of your team, in business context. Put us in opposition, really never confirm to the custumer we want to be part of his team.
Enjoyed! I am going to have to practice this (and I have many opportunities daily ...). It truly does sound like an art to master. I disconnected a little with the Aikido reference, but I know where you are coming from. Maybe it's a woman thing. I like the "seeing the world from their perspective" aspect, but not the "attack" and "use their force against them". Maybe "What feels like an attack is only a fear based reaction. Be curious; seek to understand the world through their eyes ..." ?
Genius! You are brilliant. You have helped me see the reasons to why my answering causes the discomforts with the companies of mine. Ikedo, what a great tact to help me communicate qualitatively with others. Thank you My Love, and thank you a million times!
Taking psychological methods that may be helpful to people and their issues and using it to feed on their emotions just so you can sell them junk! A profession ideal for sociopaths
Really, really great advice Conor! I'd also be interested in more on the follow up, in what happens after the "I understand, etc." Your teaching is invaluable and I share it with everyone I can!
Aikido practitioners do not 'go toward a punch' they step to one side, allow the fist to continue travelling forward, intercept the motion, take control of the momentum, guide the opponent's energy into a motion that will result in their wrist/elbow/shoulder joint etc being locked and used to force the opponent's body to continue in the direction the technique requires. They are thrown to the floor by following the momentum through in a CIRCULAR path, not forward or backward, but sideways and circular, and not in any way as described here by the snakeoilsalesman. Not unless they have a very poor Aikido teacher who doesn't actually understand Aikido. They definately shouldn't be allowed to pretend to be a teacher when they don't even understand the basic principles. Why do salespeople think it's ok to use people's gullibility to line their pockets. Why do people think this guy is some kind of mentor. Do we really want this kind of manipulative bullshit to be the way our business life is conducted? Isn't it time now that the world moved on and gave these kind of sharks their P45. x
Body language is so important. Keep your hands where people can see them. Ie. don’t put them in your pockets, behind your back or fold them. We trust people who’s hands we can see, and we find it easier to talk to people who don’t have their arms crossed in front of them.
I learn plenty whenever I listen to Conor Neil
I like this version of Jason Stathom
For whose who didn't get it: Acknowledge, Agree and do whatever the fuck you're going to do anyway! 👌
😂😂😂😂
I must learn more of "Jason Stathom"
Good one 😂
Thanks
Thank you 🙏
This os the third video I’m watching from you and all of them were full of important advices. Thank you, Mr. Conor.
Again, this is a speech worth looking at carefully. Right off the bat, the speaker tells us what he is going to say and takes his sweet time saying it. By the time he makes his point, the audience very much wants to know the punch line, having waited and waited to hear it. Then he repeats the key point several times, until we finally understand and hopefully, remember it.
Perhaps objections could be overcome using a similar story telling strategy. When someone says "your product is too expensive", tell a story. I sell a product that is "too expensive". One story I like to tell is about the success of the company, based in part on our pricing strategy. Another story is about customers who saw the light about our costly product, after talking about those who bought lower quality stuff and regretted it.
I will be delivering a speech for my speech class soon. These videos have definitely helped me. I am understanding and taking notes as I go. I have two weeks left until I give my speech. Normally I am the nervous and shy type when being in front of crowds of people, but knowing all this information helps me think less of it and focus more on my speech.
I know this was 5 years ago 🫣 so you probably don't remember at this point, but on the off chance you do. Did your speech- or the feeling you had afterward- turn out how you'd hoped?
Oh my gosh, thank you so much, I cannot thank enough - you found what was my issue having these days in my 40s!
For me very important message from here to remind myself: As higher emotions goes as lower thinking goes.
The higher emotions go ,the lower thinking gets. Wow.
Your videos help me a lot in my speech classes and have given me the confidence and skill I need to give a proper speech .
I love it how you answer the question!
Great way to answer questions with questions. Part of old SPIN selling. TY. Always excellent!
I didn't learn this in my MBA...thank you ❤
I understand your generosity Mr. Conor, In trying to show us around how to handle objections, but from the underlined wisdom and knowledge embedded in this video, how do you suggest we get rid of our old ways of stating a quick defense such as "No it's not" or an answer when faced in this kind of situation.
Dude you are amazing and I like the way you speak in a genuine way !
Very sensible advice and guidance Conor, My old dad never did a day in school, he couldn't read or write but could walk in anywhere
Thank you Mr. Neill. This will help in my relationship with my daughter :)
Thank you Conor, I have tried some of your methods at hostile meetings at work (competing work groups forced to work together to form new strategies) and it works. They respond much better then if I just give them the "our solution is better because *list of arguments*" :)
I have used these all speech and it had helped me a lot.
I am learning from your speech, Conor Neill. Thank you
Thank you 🙏
Even better is to ask them if you have understood their position. “Am I correct in assuming that price is a factor? Ok, good, what other factors..”
“Are you saying that I’m not being appreciative enough?”
one among the best videos I ever watched..
Go towards the punch, see the world through the other person “ I understand ...”
I sell for a living and done so very well for decades . I am also sold to buy salespeople and if they have this approach it won't work for me , when I ask a question I dont want a question posed I want an answer . This has overtones of evasiveness and gets me to think what else might he evade or obfuscate on ..... Also, If you get the price objection that late in the sales cycle you didnt qualify properly . You never go to the end cycle to find your price is too high ... Gather info and ask what budget set aside is for this early enough to know whether you're dealing with prospect or suspect ... Wanna know more hit me up here and I will tell you how I do it .
How could you apply this method when dealing with someone who is shifting the conversation (evasion) or moving the goal posts.
Unasema mashairi na uzuri maneno andiksa kmaa we mbyaa mrongo no 1
Great... I'll try it four times ....
Good stuff. Very pleased I stumbled across your videos. Thanks and cheers from Vancovuer.
Please recommend me books about this mentality and how to understand it better ?
Andy resources ? Thank you !
I call this A.I.O.A. This is where you ''Acknowledge and Isolate = ''I can appreciate you wanting to get the best bang for your buck, apart from that is there anything else holding you back?'' They will either give you another objection or tell you that's it. Then you Offer a solution and Ask again. ''Ok, I would hate for you to miss out on this opportunity so here's what I'm going to do for you, why don't we break this down into monthly payments...that way it's easier on your wallet and you still walk away happy, Do you want to put that on visa or mastercard?''
This classic answer a question with a question, but opening with a demonstration of your understanding of what they just said. More respectful and interestingly a key item of debate 101 to establish the stasis of the argument. The 4 other iterations of open questions, echoes 5 whys, which is classic kanban. Funny how different domains can lead to the same techniques.
@@ConorNeill 5 Whys is in Agile too, so a search will yield many good definitions. It has its critics since it sometimes leads to blaming people, so they mutate it to 5 Hows. Before this there was the Rational Manager who promoted the 5W1H of journalism (who, what, where, when, why and how). So in many domains questions can help, too many questions intimidate. But the attempt here is refined definition of the problem. What is usually missing is the opposite condition, that is, asking not only "what is it" but "what is it not" or "where is it" and "where is it not" because it is at these transitions where the actual definition resides.
So true... difficult to "reprogram" after all those years of conditioning in school. Thank you for these great analogies and your advice... brilliant 👍
when someone gives a statement e.g. "your product is too expensive", don't respond with an answer.
so great! you put the problem so graspably into words! I love it. I love this subject. we even deliver 2 days workshops to train it. so I will defintely use the way you present the problem. thank you so mich
Sales and Martial Arts. Great way to explain! 💎💎💎
Have to be very careful with this. A few people around my workplace started saying "I understand what you are saying, but..."
It was clear it was a conflict coping mechanism that they were falling back on, it dehumanised them and instantly makes me switch off seeing them as a sales person (all talk, no knowledge)
Thanks Prof. Neill! You always give really practical tips and advice!
Connor, you are a true inspiration! Would love to train with you in the future
Splendid 🏆 🏆 🏆.... an eye opener. Thank you
Thank you Conor for the idea of "I understand..."
That's great, sir. Thank you for sharing your knowledge. I'm not a salesman (actually I work with data mining) but these skills you're talking about are very useful in a number of situations, even on personal life. You've got your subscriber more. :)
Golden advice
Thank you very much sir. This is wonderful!
You've got it Neil.
It is very interesting, but I don't see a clearly laid out criteria for the question that comes after the "I understand....". It needs to be open, right. but what's the goal of the question? Is it a proposition? Or only to understand the real feelings behind the other person's question? I believe the last question can use some more scripting.
That's wonderful Neil
You are so wise, thanks God let me find your youtube to listen.
I love your video and the value that it provides
Awesome video! Thank you!
This was great but it can't work while dealing with customers. Customers will always say it's wrong.
A fantastic presentation, which combines a number of elements in an original synthesis. He's not the first to talk about communication aikido. He's not the first to talk about "blowing your lid" (flight, fight, freeze response)--see Dan Siegel for example. Nonetheless, this presentation puts a number of such no-so-novel elements together in an original way that makes an original point.
Legit life advice, thank you
Connor, thank you. You are truly inspirational. I will be sharing your ideas with others. Terrific.
Great speech. I love it!
Excellent video Conor! I like the tactic of "I understand..."
Me "This is called manipulation. Sociopaths use these techniques. It would be difficult to be this man's friend."
Him: "I understand that you think I am a manipulative sociopath. What would you say if I could show you 5 ways we could be friends?"
Witty 👏🏻
"Murderers use guns, therefore everyone who uses a gun is a murderer" that is not a logical thought to have lol. Context and intentions make an action moral or immoral
SO YOU SAY I UNDERSTAND YOU SAY OUR PRODUCT IS TOO EXPENSIVE AND YOU HAVE SOME GOOD WORDS TO FILL IN ABOUT YOUR PRODUCT? IT GIVES YOU WHAT IS BEHIND THIS?
Wow! This is amazing. I can see the application in a presentation AND in interpersonal situations. Presently, I am confronted with responding to an objection and must confess, my initial response was old school. Thanks to you, I have a far more productive tool. This will require that I, "man up" and be prepared for the feedback...but I am willing.
Thank You So Much🙏🌺
2.47 Is Stupider an actual word?
Loved your way of problem solving capability. Loved your analysing and how we can practice
Great video! However, What could I say if after I say "I understand" the other person says "no you dont!"?
Then answer him or her with "yeah i feel u, im not kidding" "im on your side wid that" but ............
Excellent concept. We should rethink about the paradigm of always giving answers to questions.
This is gold!❤
Glad I saw this video!
Quite helpful. Answers dont really have to be this one "I understand, bla bla bla" but this is the direction. Strive to figure out which possible thoughts and feeling associated to the question itself. It's no an easy exercise for a 18 years programmed person.
1. "I understand that..." 2. Ask an open question.
Wow great video love to watch more,nice video thanks for sharing with us
Welcome to the Rhetorical Journey!
I understand that you have a good point.
TO ANSWERS QUESTIONS WE WERE TAUGHT TO ANSWER QUESTIONS? IN REAL LIFE IN GETTING TO OTHERS IS GIVE AN ANSWER TO QUESTIONS? GIVING AN ANSWER IS NOT THEIR REAL ISSUE IS BECAUSE THERE IS AN EMOTIONAL REACTION SO PRACTICE HOW YOU WILL RESPOND BECAUSE YOU NEED TO SAY I UNDERSTAND AND REPEAT AND GIVE AN OPEN QUESTION BACK?
I was thinking more debate style objections
It's just basic pedagogy. Just make sure that the other person knows that you know how they feel.
wow. .. what great you are ..... thank you so much 👏👏🌷🌷
Mind opening ! Something I’ve always struggled with . Thank you sharing for this !
Nakuona kmaa umechsnganyikiwaa na ushapewa yangu yote kmaa siwezi tena kubali ww naww ati waona mm nakutakaa sababuu brother wakoo buuu shirt😜😜😜😜😜👊👊👊👊👊👊👊👊khaalaass
I have a question. ..what if that person just throw it straight back at u.. what do you understand? You understand nothing. ...how should we respond to that please. ..thankyou
This is great advice, and not just for sales but for life in general. Thank you for sharing! 💖from 🇫🇯
very educational, These are some of relevant tools I can use in my job, dealing with objection is something we deal in our daily life, and sometimes answers are never there for you, but this puts it so simple, Thank you for your brilliant advice. Mr Neil
Tem sido muito importante para mim assistir a seus vídeos. Eles realmente têm me ajudado muito a compreender as questões abordadas e isso me torna mais seguro quando tenho que desempenhar meu trabalho.
Sou-lhe eternamente grato.
Continue assim, pois você tem ajudado muitas pessoas.
it is hard to change a habbit , I watchef this vedio 5 times I agree with the concept but when I face similar situation I counsiously reply by either defense or question
now Sir I would like your advise what is the best way to get rid of such habit
No reply? Sorry. Just keep trying.
Thank you 🙏
Excelent perpestive. Sometime ago a customer told me "your service is expensive", I responded him, yes it is. But my service likely has other values than other proposal do not have... and I explain why.
First thing I do when I meet a customer is tell him, I want to be part of your team, in business context.
Put us in opposition, really never confirm to the custumer we want to be part of his team.
This tip is very useful!
Thank you, so much for this!!
You are really making difference in our lives. Thank you so much.
Excellent…Conor Neill has an amazing personality.
Thank you Conor, great video, really inspiring.
AMAZING Conor - thank you! #success
Conor, thanks for the clarification. I think it's a very valuable interpersonal communication tip. We need lots of those :)
Enjoyed! I am going to have to practice this (and I have many opportunities daily ...). It truly does sound like an art to master. I disconnected a little with the Aikido reference, but I know where you are coming from. Maybe it's a woman thing. I like the "seeing the world from their perspective" aspect, but not the "attack" and "use their force against them". Maybe "What feels like an attack is only a fear based reaction. Be curious; seek to understand the world through their eyes ..." ?
We need to learn from your experience please translation to arapic 🙏💜
Genius! You are brilliant. You have helped me see the reasons to why my answering causes the discomforts with the companies of mine. Ikedo, what a great tact to help me communicate qualitatively with others. Thank you My Love, and thank you a million times!
Taking psychological methods that may be helpful to people and their issues and using it to feed on their emotions just so you can sell them junk!
A profession ideal for sociopaths
I simply love it.
You're AMAZING, sir!✨🌟
Conor, I like this. However be careful with "i understand. " perhaps better to say "I hear you". Thanks for this
Please someone call Steve Coogan hours of entertainment imitating this guy
Really, really great advice Conor! I'd also be interested in more on the follow up, in what happens after the "I understand, etc." Your teaching is invaluable and I share it with everyone I can!
Aikido practitioners do not 'go toward a punch' they step to one side, allow the fist to continue travelling forward, intercept the motion, take control of the momentum, guide the opponent's energy into a motion that will result in their wrist/elbow/shoulder joint etc being locked and used to force the opponent's body to continue in the direction the technique requires. They are thrown to the floor by following the momentum through in a CIRCULAR path, not forward or backward, but sideways and circular, and not in any way as described here by the snakeoilsalesman. Not unless they have a very poor Aikido teacher who doesn't actually understand Aikido. They definately shouldn't be allowed to pretend to be a teacher when they don't even understand the basic principles.
Why do salespeople think it's ok to use people's gullibility to line their pockets. Why do people think this guy is some kind of mentor. Do we really want this kind of manipulative bullshit to be the way our business life is conducted? Isn't it time now that the world moved on and gave these kind of sharks their P45. x
My ex-wife said the magic had gone out of our marriage so I disappeared LOL