Getting REAL on Getting OLD
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- Опубліковано 7 вер 2024
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Aging is a gift and the most important relationship all of us have is the one we have with ourselves.
Hey guys, I have been watching your videos with great interest for sometime now. My partner was 31 and I am 66. I say was because he passed away Monday the 15th from Liver and Kidney disease. We had a great relationship as he was an old soul who loved older tv shows and country music. He was my rock as I survived cancer, a heart valve replacement and a stroke. He was there and took care of me as I did for him in his time on earth. It was wonderful to find someone as well adjusted for his age and knew what he wanted in life. Age was never an issue. He will be missed dearly. I just wanted to say that life is how you live it. We had 8 years together. Robby
I'm so sorry for your loss 😢
@@ontheaaron Thank you.
@@user-kn6yo9qe1t thats a beautiful real life story …. Its not the length of ourselves but the individual minutes
Hi Robbi, it's so nice that you had 8 years together, you must miss him so much. I was born in 1957, so I'm probably a tad older than you, like you I manage to find a great soul mate, fortunately we are still having fun together getting together when I was 21 and he was 28, I always liked older guys 😂.
You take care my friend and enjoy your life and the wonderful memories you both made while you were together ❤️ ❤️
@@flashant Thank you for your kind words. I appreciate it greatly.
I’m 67 and take care of myself - never know when someone might come along and connect.
Me too!
I'm available!
I have been down on myself for a while; I'm 71. But I have to keep remembering that there is an autoimmune disease which will not go away, diverticulitis surgery which went haywire, dehisced twice and no belly button now, broken foot 3 times, kidnapped and beat up badly, had Covid before the shots were available losing a lot of lung function and almost not making it, and finally having Covid again. Yeah, I was really hard on myself. I bet if you look at your life you can find many things to be proud of too! Give yourself a break!
Excellent video and shining a spotlight on a topic which affects all of us survivors!
You are truly a survivor. Kudos
Great conversation. 61 here and aging gracefully (3 times a week in the gym). Have a a husband who's 69. We make it work.
Same here … and we have common interests …. Our dog and gardening
Im 45. Getting Older is both good and bad but ultimately it's what you make of it.
With that smile mr. Jones you might have the best coming. 😊
Well done. When you guys do these types of Vlogs, you’re doing a great service to the community.
At 66, I’m still working my 4th career full steam as a Tour Director (11 years now) … taking my guests on vacation all over the world. My guests think I’m in my late 40’s, low 50’s … do what you love, love what you do … be authentic to your spirit. Am I single? Yes. Lonely? No. Would I like to settle down again after 21 years of being partnered (single now for 13 years)? Of course … as many commenters have said already, it’ll happen when it’s suppose to … and for now live life to the fullest …
Brian is correct about the body changing and staying healthy through great care.
Hey menz! So, my hubby and I are 15 years apart. I am 49 and he is 63. We love each other and aging as been a crack up. The knee and ankle cracks, and getting off the couch slow😂!
For me aging has been great. As a former dancer, spin instructor, baseball, softball player. My body has been through hell. But, I have taken care of it. The glutes and legs are fine 😀. I have learned how to embrace all of my grey hair on top and bottom 😝! I just need to get my mental back in order! You two are great and love every video you put out! Age gracefully, and love every change that comes
Hey guys, 73 years old, 37 of them with AIDS. I had 34 years with two different men 14 and 20 years, the last one died in 2012. I was fine in the beginning but that was 12 years ago. Being old, gay and alone sucks. I’ve tried to connect once again, no luck. I don’t have enough sugar to lure a younger man and older men want younger men. I was devoted to both men, they died from AIDS. I never expected to be alone at this age. And honestly, I just don’t know how to move forward. I don’t need therapy, I need a man.
I'm sorry to hear this sir. I'm 46 and dating is no easier for me at this age. I hope you're able find your guy. Everyone deserves to be happy and have a great partner ( if that's what they want of course)
I know it’s not just me and I did have two long term relationships so I’ve been lucky. To you sir, I wish you luck. You’re too young to be alone.
@user-nu4uh9fh1b thank you sir! Please tell others that please. I like older guys. "Daddy likes Daddies"
am 66 years old n in your boat not rich but alot of love to give i don't need money but companionship
@@johns.9819 Yes, that’s what I’m talking about. I need companionshipt like you. So hard to find as you know.
"Do not go gentle into that good night,
Old age should burn and rave at close of day;
Rage, rage against the dying of the light." -Dylan Thomas
Hi dear ❤
Hi dear ❤
I just turned 83 and believe me, my spouse and I are still making memories (he will soon be 74). Are they the same kind of memories we made at 38 or 47? No way. But there is no just sitting around staring at the walls and rehashing the “good old days.” You are where you are in life. Limitations? Adjust and move on. Keep your mind, body and spirit mobile and healthy and as strong as the current phase of your life will allow. Gay “life” isn’t all bar hopping and hookups. Be curious. Explore. Meet new people. See new places. Live large.
💯💯💯love this - thanks Daniel!
You boys would be fun to have in Key West in April with us!!!
Great inspiring counsel keep living the both of you
Love the mentoring wisdom you both share. Motivates those of all ages to ask questions, explore, and look to good people to help navigate life. As a mid 50s guy who is just now starting to be better about being my authentic self, I appreciate your insights and perspectives. I actually attended my first pride recently and truly appreciated the opportunity to be part of the community and continue to live life.
That’s great!
Thank you! So great to have these conversations out loud! I’m 45 and single and have great gay friendships that keep me feeling loved!
..... And the wizard of Oz said, "A heart is not judged by how much you love; but by how much you are loved by others."
Good circle of friendships
might even be more useful and important for a Gay man than that 1 partner. More social contacts, sharing, fun. Especially if all are good friends with each other.
I’m 58 and my partner just turned 29. We’ve been together for 7 years now. I go through this motion of saying geeze I’m 58. My partner was just saying dam* I’m 29 now. I told him once you hit 20 next thing you know you are 25, 30,35 so on.
Jesus Christ is the only way to everlasting life. Believe in Him: He loves you, and He is with you no matter what. He will never abandon nor forsake you.
What a joy it is to see how much love and respect you have for each other. Sending you both lots of love 💕
Grandmom always said you can age in fear or you can age in Grace. I know Grace she's a really fun broad and makes a hella good martini! Cheers! Allen
Society as a whole isn’t interested in oldies , im in a relationship of 48 yrs ,but i know one of us is going to be on our own one day . But I think the thing is to make sure you keep friends close ,so you dont become isolated .
Amazing conversation!!! Lucky to call you both my close friends:)
“Oh look the year I was born” you got me Brian😂😂
Another thing Bri and I have in common....cider!
We produce major tasty cider here in Ireland.
I'm 65 as you know. Because of my 30 plus years of hitting the gym,
regularly, I eat like an Italian, have a small number of
lovely friends in my life. I am blessed. My road always
has been "the road less travelled," challenging and lead me
to many different and interesting themes and adventures.
Therapy and the talking therapies have considerably helped me
down the years. I got lucky back in my 20s! Got into TA and Gestalt
Psy and have used my skills and knowledge ever since.Invaluable.
These are the best days of my life, hands down.
Incidentally...sunscreen is vitally important for everybody.
I’m 62 it’s been up and down but mostly Up. I retired but I’m still working part time because I love it. Yes I have to slow down on the beer. Keep your body in shape as much as possible walking, stretching, gym, but I keep busy politics don’t forgot Guys vote for your president Biden/Harris. I’m watching from afar CANADA 🇨🇦 I remember my days in Key West, Fort Lauderdale, Miami .etc. Stay away from negative people.
Blessing to all are lost souls of AIDS.
Cheers 💙🇨🇦🇺🇸🏳️🌈
Absolutely voting is critical. My parents were from Quebec. Most of my family is still there. I wish I could retire at 62. I'm ready at 59 but have to go until 67.
I'm 67, i met my husband when i was 21, Denis is 74 now, and we are still as happy as can be, we are best pals as well as an old married couple 😊 I am so very lucky to have had and still having a wonderful life, everyone deserves the same. Love to you all ❤
That’s awesome! 👏🏼 😘
I’m 69, 70 later this year. Like many here, I’ve had 2 long term relationships, 22 and 12 yrs. he passed 11 years ago. I love living alone however I’m never lonely. My life is filled with friends and new adventures which, I seek. I can’t help aging but I can help how I age; for that purpose, I work out at the gym, walk, hike and cycle 20-30 miles a day.
The only thing I miss is intimacy which, in my opinion is challenging to get online.
To stay young keep moving, keep challenging yourself; when asked if you’d like to do something especially if it’s outside your comfort zone, your answer should always be: when and where. Enjoy life.
Guess I’ll wait and see if love comes my way again; while I’m not looking, one never knows what’ll happen next.
With your amazingly positive attitude anyone would be fortunate to get you. 😘
I've been in several relationships. 26 years with the first, may he stay 1500 miles away where he is. The second was the one. What chemistry, true love,. He died of an unexpected massive heart attack at age 44, 18 months into us. Then an 8 year relationship with a guy 29 years my junior. Now with a married couple in a triad. I will say, except for number 2, men have been disappointing. But hey, I really enjoy being with me! Relationships are too much work for too little reward. Get a good dog, a couple of f buddies and travel.
I’d love to know if anyone else has a friendship like the one I’m about to describe. I’m a 56 year old gay guy and one of my best friends is a straight 24 year old guy who has a lovely girlfriend. We met at work and instantly clicked like we had a past life. We hang out, he helps me go to the gym, we learn so much from each other and I introduce him to a world of all things vintage and he taught me things like video games, riding an e-scooter and all kinds of things, I can keep up with his some of his partying which shocks him 😆 such a great and very unexpected and mutually caring friendship, we discussed boundaries so it’s all good 👍 20 somethings are lovely welcoming and fun people
Friends don't base their friends on their sexuality.
Attitude, keeping a positive attitude and staying active surrounded by friends. Keeping a gratitude journal also helps. Lonely or bored, get out of the house and change your environment by taking a walk and enjoying your surroundings 👍❤️💕🤗
Great conversation. Luv you guys! ❤ wish I had friends like you
66 years old here. I think the gentleman said it best who stated "if it ain't right don't stay." In hindsight, truer words...Also, the Pet Shop Boys wrote these lyrics: After being for so many years the life and soul of the party it's weird, I'm invisible. I AM glad I was young(er) during the 70s and 80s when going out was much more fun. But now I KNOW what I like--and don't, and as they say, I don't sweat the small stuff.
I told a young cutie in a swimming pool, who was getting a lot of attention, "Enjoy it while you can. No one stays young and pretty forever." If looks could kill, I would have been William Holden floating in the swimming pool in "Sunset Boulevard."
@@Ephemeral2023 And the cutie wouldn't get the reference.
Excellent video and agreed. My husband and I have 18 years between us but as you mentioned, he has an old soul and I a younger active even though I’m the older. Staying active is the game changer as you age. Keep the great videos coming 💪❤️
I'm 61, retired, and a widower. My partner was 16 years older than me. Being retired is such a blessing. I am free to fill my time as I see fit (mostly), write, play music, make art, garden, and more. The downside of aging is the grim reaper taking away kith and kin and partner, but I am still alive and am becoming a wiser and more resilient person. The mind, heart, and spirit of a partner (or good friend) is equally important as the body and being healthy is more important than surface appearances. I am authentic, honest, empathetic and communicative and am looking for a partner who also has those characteristics. Good luck to me. Keep making your excellent heartfelt videos!
Fantastic conversation!
I really appreciated the insights from the older guys!
Love you guys and all your videos! Most important in slowing the aging process is a good (mostly organic), healthy plant based diet with lots of anti-oxidants (and of course an active lifestyle with lots of exercise with a healthy balance of adequate rest). . My pic (on this post) was taken at the beginning of this year. I turned 76 on Feb. 9th and most people think I'm in my mid to late 50s, 60 max.
"
I lost a lot of chances in my younger years to find the love of my life, mainly because it was much more dangerous to be out of the closet than today, thus creating a form of a little internal homophobia. I wish I cold turn back the clock and correct my mistakes.
For the younger guys out there, don't make the same mistake I did! If I can reach just one person with this advice, I'll be a happy camper.
Once again, a fantastic video on an important topic! You guys hit so many different nails square on the heads! Thanks for showing the various different opinions/input bits from some of us. And I particularly love Brian's attitude, which isw much like my own - yeah, my body may not be perfect, but I'm not going to obsess over it. Living life OUT LOUD means enjoying it, whether alone or in a relationship. You two are such a shining example for me, and I'm sure for many others among this great community!
Brian is so handsome! (Of course Jon is a cutie) them shorts though cat calling!!❤❤
I am 70 now but feel much younger thanks to being in very good health. I was with my first partner for 27 years. We drifted apart but are still good friends. I met my current partner when I was 55 and there is a big age difference like you guys. He has pushed me into keeping very active and get a part time job. My biggest concern is not for me but for him. I hope when I am gone he finds a partner who is as wonderful to him as he has been to me 😊
I am 53 and have a severe autoimmune disease. My partner of 20 years is my support. Of course, I don’t expect him to be sexually faithful to me, and am more than happy for him to find fulfillment elsewhere. We do not own our partners. If I am destined to be alone again, that is part of being human. I am more than willing to embrace this when it comes. Disease, age, and death is all part of this life, yes? Good luck to everyone. Enjoy your joys, treasure your loves, and accept what is to come with bravery and skill.
I have always been into Silver Foxes, even when I was a legal late teen.... Not because I thought maybe there was something I could get out of him. I look back on my adolescent years and young adulthood, and realize how innately self-assured I was (even though I was wise enough at the time, to know just how much "a child" I still was). I knew enough I had no biusiness getting into a relationship at that age, when I hadn't even seen the wider world at that time. Now that I'm 50, I don't look at myself as aging-- just holding steady. I knew as kid there were things even then my body wouldn't let me do-- and acknowledged those limits. --- For you, Brian is a beautiful man!!! Breathe him in, with all the blessing he is!!! And be grateful and thankful for every day you are together!!
Sweet note, thanks
Brilliant and thank you guys. This meant a lot to hear and is so timely. I have watched so many of your vid's and love them all, but I rate this one highly. Thanks for the honest discussion on age gap relationships.
A dear friend once said to me, "either grow old or die young." That has stuck with me through the decades, so many friends and associates that I once knew died very young...
I was 11 years older than my long-term partner. We were together more than 20 years. I am 65 now. Sadly he didn't make it to 50😢 as he died of a very aggressive brain tumor 8 years ago. My heart is forever broken 💔 sadly I think I will be living the rest of my life as a single gay man as most guys are only looking for a younger man or a sugar daddy.
Probably no difference for straight people
@@JNO_JNO absolutely agree
Now at 71 I recognize big mistakes that I made in attempts at relationships. When I was in my youth it was all about good looks, living in L.A. Need I say more???
Say more about the things you are happy about. Did someone say it was all about looks and LA to you.
Speaking for my self: when aging, it is getting easier to see through peoples looks, into their persons, but that personalities usually have radically difference depending on peoples age. I often sense that cultural/psychological gap between generations (at least in my society, wich is not US).
I'm 36 years old. My Type ♂️ is
- At least over 40
- Preferably over 50
- Ideally over 60
Beautiful video, guys!
❤love U guys. One of the best vlogs to date. Look forward to seeing more of you.🎉
Great video and great topic. If ever I were to write a book I would title it 1 to 10, Our lives in a nutshell. Have a great weekend everybody
While I enjoy your channel, this has to be one of my favorite episodes. What you presented rings very true. It’s important to give back, like volunteering for a non profit you’re passionate about. We can’t help how many times this big ball of dirt has circled the sun while we’re on top of it- ya gotta make the most of every day we get. Thanks guys!
Well said!
Been with my husband for 47 years... We're the same age, only a month apart. I don't know where I'd be today without him. Of course we've had our hard times, that's normal in any relationship. In the end, grow together but be yourself too. Save your $ and #1 listen carefully before you speak, don't let your "in the moment" emotions cloud your head...
Is this a moot point? Unless you are a vampire or an immortal. The true question is...how did you live your life before you reach "this" critical age. If you were a "dick" for 70 years...who cares? I understand that we don't want to die alone..but the aging process is a subjective thing. In my solo maturity I have begun to appreciate my wit/wisdom and the privacy is enjoyable. Thanks fellas..you have a great channel.
Bravo guys!!!! Just turned 69…..luv that number😈🤣.
I workout regularly , eat healthy , try my best to stay active and busy ….BUT can’t deny genetics , sometimes it’s a bummer. Most of the time , it’s good . Sense of humor helps tremendously .
I am 57 years old, single, and no surviving family. I have thought about my own mortality and what is to come. It can be quite overwhelming and scary, so I choose to do a tequila shot and just not think about it. BTW .... I love your videos.
Gin & tonic for me. My worst fear is living as long as my 94 yr old mother and her 90 yr old father. All her generation have long passed. She had us kids but we were spread out in the country. 2 of us took care of every aspect of a her death & estate. The other 3 siblings couldn't care less until the will passed probate.
Do some videos on these things to do for good aging.
Inspiring conversation B and J. Wish I had this level of mutual conversation with my B (Ben). I am J too, LOL. PS: would love be Brian's trainer! with all respect.
Sharing this with my two best friends who are both in age-gap gay relationships, just to support what I, as an older woman, keep telling them.
Hi Guys!!! 😊❤😊 And, go, Ms. Joannie!!! 👍🏽👍🏽👍🏽99 years and doing her thing.
I'm 65. Be kind to yourself. For me, loneliness comes into the picture sometimes bc some of my friends died of AIDS or moved out of the state. Be kind.
I am 67 my husband is 34 we have been married for 8 years we're fine we enjoy each other and aging is just part of the process .
I like it when you guys talk about being gay and aging. It’s not a topic that people talk about much. And everyone’s advice was excellent. I just add that every gay retiree should also have a UA-cam channel lol. it’s a great hobby and a great way to meet new friends and have new adventures. You’ll get bored if you have a UA-cam channel, that’s for sure! 😄👍
Love, but what is the alternative to aging? That said, we are both 57 and have gone part time and it's working great!
I'm 54 and feeling amazing thanks to a healthy lifestyle, although I do have a bad back, so I put a lot of effort into strengthening and preserving my body. That said, I'm a loner and tend not to be emotionally available. I'm on solid ground with my physical health, so I fell great about how I am aging, but my mental health needs some work.
See a therapist. I do.
@@Ephemeral2023 I realize that therapy can be very helpful but, unfortunately, my insurance doesn't cover mental health services...imagine that in this day and age! I can't afford to pay out of pocket for this, but eventually...
I am gay, 77, and was married to my accepting wife for 51 years. I nursed her with MS for 26 years before she passed. I am now free to be the gay man I always was. But I'm not looking for a boyfriend/husband. I am quite content being single. My two adult kids and their families are very accepting which is great.
I m going to be 60 years old in November ❤
Old photo or really still looking thát great. 😊
Im 61......I have some fears.....it is what it is....life happening
I'm still here African American Gay Male living decades with HIV now 68 years old. Stop looking Andy and listen to who's around you GAY and Straight! We still need allies.🌈💯
You missed the "so excidered to be here" dad-joke opportunity.
Very subtle ageism Jokes from Jon. Hmmmmmm I'm a year younger than Brian and understand and value all of this.
Getting old, gay and single sucks. I am 74 years old. It's the pitts when your mind says yes and your body says no.
HELL YEAH, Or NO. Best motto ever.
Cool
Getting old.....girls, can we talk? I could write a book but I'd rather spend my time getting older because I have to!
I meet gay men in their eighties. and they are still looking for their soulmate. this is just tragic!
Wow. I'm 59 and completely gave up 9 years ago.
I’m 66 and no long relationship. Gave up all homo contacts at 50. I was ok with that. Feeling lonely and scared since a year.
Well, two people just contradicted your statement. Here’s the third.
@@wordscapes5690 - Contradict the fact that vast majority of Gay men cannot connect ?
You and they are the exceptions confirming reality. I’m happy for you and them. You all know you got lucky.
66 doing it gracefully🤔
Being gay is socially and politically a 'youth' culture (it being largely a sex culture). Old people are most likely to experience loneliness, depression, out of place and not fitting to the general life style. Have that at the back of your mind and i am not even old, yet
😊😊😊
Age is a weird thing for Gay folks. For most guys in their 50s or 60s on dating apps you're too old if you're 30. 😅😅
The pooch is a curse. I try and try. I never noticed it on you
❤❤❤
I still don’t believe in open relationships or cheating. But finding monogamy is a b--h
❤
❤❤❤❤❤❤
Aging can be great if you learn your lessons.
i'm 40 and gave up years ago. no other gay guy wants someone with all my health problems.
Has anyone ever said that to you?
Most of the advice for being gay and 30 told him to leave his relationship. I would. Soon
The moment young men sidle up next to you, have a meaningless chat, you buy them a drink because you need a refill, and it would be rude not to buy them a Mai-tia banana split with two umbrellas, they slither away, and never come back for more meaningless chat, you know you've become a sugar daddy "mark". You're old.
They come home with you, have sex, sleep, have breakfast, whatsapp a few times and then ghost you. Yet that’s more than in the old days in the eighties. Never got breakfast and no chat channels. So that was it.
For me ‘Gay life’ sucks.
But is being harassed by a woman better ? I lived a very free life. Now at 66 i find it very difficult to be alone.
@@louisdewit4429 I always went to their house. Wham, bam, t'you, mam, and I was out the door by 2AM and home in my comfy bed. Those days are in my rear-view mirror like yours, except I love being alone.
Sorry you are in a place you'd rather not be.
Jonathan you have to marry Brian.👨❤💋👨
I think we should, with respect, mind our own business, when we don't know histories.
my fear is being alone at 66 n gay
Sadly I am already there....I know what you are feeling 😥
I keep saying: see a therapist. I do. I go mainly because I want someone outside my box (personal and social life) to check in with me.
I’m there now. 66. Few good acquaintances and that’s it.
@@louisdewit4429 yes its lonely for me
𝙴𝚡𝚌𝚎𝚕𝚕𝚎𝚗𝚝
I want a daddy for My Life
Harry’s super hot. :)
Are u two a couple? What’s the age gap? Sex drive is very different 30 years apart, at the end of the day men are men. And sex is a big part of our culture, and when two men are in a relationship. not sure how sex works with a BIG AGE GAP. A 30 year old can get off 3 or 4 times a day, and they keep it hard a a rock. Not so much after 60, def not after 70.
You are painting older men with a very broad brush. You are focused on one thing. Sex. Great sex doesn't mean a great relationship.
@@Ephemeral2023 sorry there is nothing sexually compatible between a 30 year old and a 70 year old- yes for the fling or donation 🌹 but a 30 year old has needs that a 70 year simply doesn’t have anymore and definitely not have the same drive or libido. Every age comes with a stage. And 30 and 70 are not even in the same realm
Make America Gay Again MAGA
I’m sorry but older men are hot 🔥
Don’t be sorry! 🤣😂
@@OutLoudJB 😏❤️🔥
I love your videos but come on the body counts a lot. Don't be hypocritic
I'm sorry that I'm not big enough
Big enough? As in body size or 🍆?
That's an open remark
@Ephemeral2023 Jon rejected me for an interview because I don't have enough subscribers
@@ontheaaron Jon's loss. Confidence in yourself is what matters most.
There's always another 🕳 ⛳️. Just gotta keep puttin!
The richer you are the more you enjoy retirement .. plain and simple .. you have better health care to make life better
❤