Autistic Burnout vs. Depression
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- Опубліковано 27 чер 2023
- Many autistic individuals have been treated for depression when really what they were experiencing was an autistic burnout. This video explores the similarities and differences between the two, and how this knowledge can improve your quality of life as someone on the autism spectrum.
TW: Brief mention of suicide around the 10:00 mark
DISCLAIMER: Taylor Heaton is not a licensed medical provider and nothing in this video constitutes medical advice. Please seek qualified medical care before making any changes to your healthcare routine.
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⏰ TIMESTAMPS ⏳
2:32 Similarities
5:19 Depression column
12:12 Meltdown column
16:09 Why knowing the difference matters
17:00 Outside support
17:43 My Manta sleep mask! (affiliate product bit.ly/3n3l64I use code: MOMONTHESPECTRUM for 10% off at checkout)
DISCLAIMER: Taylor Heaton is not a licensed psychologist or specialist healthcare professional. Her services do not replace the care of psychologists or other healthcare professionals. Please note that Taylor can’t take any responsibility for the results of your actions, nor any harm or damage you suffer as a result of the use, or non-use of the information available through her website, UA-cam Channel, or social media accounts. Please use judgment and conduct due diligence before taking any action or implementing any plan or practice suggested or recommended by Taylor Heaton or Mom on the Spectrum. Please note that Taylor doesn't make any guarantees about the results of the information you may apply from her website, UA-cam channel, and/or social media accounts. Taylor shares educational and informational resources that are intended to help you succeed in navigating life as an autistic adult. You nevertheless need to know that your outcome will be the result of your own efforts, your particular situation, and innumerable other circumstances beyond Taylor's knowledge and control. Taylor is an Amazon affiliate and may receive commissions on qualifying purchases from affiliate links. Taylor is a Flare affiliate and may receive commissions on qualifying purchases from Flare links.
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#actuallyautistic #momonthespectrum #autisticadult
Depression: nothing matters.
Autistic Burnout: I don’t have the energy to make it matter.
🙌🏼 this!
I have had these overlap, no fun.
Yes! That's the frustrating thing about burnout - I generally still care, or still want to do the thing, but taking the steps to do the thing feels impossible.
YES!? This describe what I feel but I didn't know how to put in words
Yes, I was originally diagnosed depression but it's really autism
This makes so much sense. Never diagnosed, but I can definitely relate. I have fairly regular periods of extreme fatigue when I barely function. There's no particular sadness that comes with it, just an overwhelming desire to disconnect and retreat.
Y E S .
Dr Oyalo herbs is really helpful, and have helped my son improve with his speech and social skill complete. My son now responds to name, his aggressive behavior has stoped completely
@@DhhskkHehdiswhich herbs?
Thank you so much for this. I recall a video with Tony Attwood, where he said something that resonated with me. That, unlike depression, the deep despair (and even suicidal ideation) of autistic burnout/meltdown can shift rather quickly as soon as the neurological system is more regulated. So it can feel like the end of the world one second, and as soon as the noise, smell, anxiety-provoking stimuli is gone and we're back to a more regulated system, things are fine again.
wow, been my issue all my life. For me, it was to escape the pain and is scares me how far my animal person will go to escape the pain. Also had a life time of autoimmunities including arthritis & crohn's, so so many overlying issues. Every time, it was to escape the pain. Hard part is knowing what TYPE of pain I'm trying to escape. But as soon as the painful stimulus is removed, I get better. So much that family thought I was faking or just doing it for attention, when in reality, I saw no other choice to end the pain and that was the only option my brain could see. I just wanted the pain to stop, KWIM? Anyhoo, so hard for others on the outside to see/understand esp if there is overlapping issues.
@@nerdtubewtf On the Crohn's, I have celiac disease and have found L-glutamine very helpful.
Exactly
Dr Oyalo herbs is really helpful, and have helped my son improve with his speech and social skill complete. My son now responds to name, his aggressive behavior has stoped completely
totally disagree. This trivialises burnout, which can be very long lasting and exhausting. Burnout is NOT the same thing as a meltdown. Meltdown is generally short lived and yes can change when stimili change. Burnout is a longer term thing and cannot be cured quickly by self regulating. You are talking about meltdown and clearly have never been in the hell of burnout otherwise you wouldn't spread such harmful rubbish
Oh, the “there’s nothing wrong with you” really hit me in the heart. There have been so many times during my life where I haven’t had any energy to do anything and people would say “you’re depressed”, but I wasn’t sad. I just felt (and currently feel like) I just want to go into a cozy hibernation for a while before I can function in the NT world again. It’s hard not to beat myself up about the lack of productivity though. Those societal expectations are so ingrained in us.
I remember, when I was 19, a doctor telling me I was the happiest depressed person he'd ever met, and promptly handing me a prescription for an antidepressant that made me feel like I was existing in a fishbowl. I knew quickly that whatever he thought was wrong with me... wasn't wrong with me. And I've always felt like an alien - in my family, among my peers/coworkers etc.
As I've grown (I'm nearly 45), I've come to realize how trauma, ADHD and I'm almost certain autism have impacted my ability (or inability) to interact with a so-called "neurotypical" world. I have not been given an official diagnosis, but after taking some of the online assessments you've shared, I have no doubts and it has helped to explain so much.
Your videos have been so helpful in working through some of the confusion and, frankly, astonishment. I find myself wondering aloud, "How could this have all been so missed?" But I know. I know why, and I don't blame anyone for not better understanding what may have been (was/is) going on with me.
I'm just so grateful for you and your openness! I wish we could be friends. 😊
I'm 30 and diagnosed with ADHD and Autism since last year. They put me on Sertraline, Citalopram, Mirtazapine etc... It was a rough few years in the fishbowl. Hope you get your diagnosis soon!
Can relate to this quite strongly. Thanks for sharing and putting it into words.
Yes same here well said!! I cant believe its took me 34 years to figure this out!!!
Dr Oyalo herbs is really helpful, and have helped my son improve with his speech and social skill complete. My son now responds to name, his aggressive behavior has stoped completely
I have had a very similar experience. VERY. I am not Taylor by any stretch of the imagination, but I would offer my friendship to you and most people that are in her comment section. ❤️
I'm 49. My therapist is ready to send me for testing. We are already certain of the outcome. Question is who needs me to take this test? 🤔
It is quite a process and a lot to process. Like you, I'm getting to the point where I at least understand how it was missed. And i'm trying to get past that. I don't wanna lose any more time than I already have to trauma, missed diagnosis, and misdiagnoses , emotional and physical. I have had a heck of a couple of years. My apologies if I sing a hundred thousand miles away. I wanted to reach out to you but I am quite literally in the middle of a medical emergency. Don't worry anybody i'm working on it.
About a year ago I was diagnosed as suffering major depression, due to not being able to get myself off the couch to do literally anything. The part that never made sense to me was the feeling of being overwhelmed by any task and major decision fatigue. No antidepressants helped in any way, which really made me wonder what was going on. Knowing about burnout now, makes so much sense.
Anti depressants never worked for me either, I need to feel my emotions to process them properly, meditation , journaling, and talk therapy is what works best, not drugs, at least that's my experience in my mental health struggles, I am in this mindset now that there is a missing piece, I am going to pursue this autism piece in my life
Dr Oyalo herbs is really helpful, and have helped my son improve with his speech and social skill complete. My son now responds to name, his aggressive behavior has stoped completely
Anyone else here that's had full-blown panic attacks from a burnout--particularly a late diagnosis and resisting your stims?
Yes. Mine is related to autism/severe depression, caused by my job loss three weeks ago. It is worse when I go to bed/wake-up next day. It feels almost surmountable to do anything. At 58, I'm used-up, tired, depressed, and just want to die. Living is too much of a chore, anymore.
Yes
yes I get daily panic attacks, I know now that I am on the spectrum, but like many of us I was misdiagnosed as a child, I amm now 48 ....
What is very interesting to me is the effect of trauma and abuse on my autism, as I get older the autism seems to get worse, but that being said, my trauma the last 48 years was more than most can or will experience. My point being I believe strongly that trauma and abuse can make our autism much worse. I used to stem unnoticeable for years, even worked in corporate environment, now I cant hide my stemming, I rock my body or will walk up and down or move my legs to the point of physical pain and then I still cant stoo. I was misdiagnosed for my whole life..... and that is very sad, if I knew what I know today, many things would have been so different. But I am also turning this around and tryiing to make a positive difference in our community. Love u all xxx
If you try to add ADHD into this mix, it gets far more difficult to distinguish what exactly is going on.
Or even CPTSD…when you have one or multiple it definitely complicates things a whole lot more. 😔
If you’re a woman with autism and adhd - perimenopause messes with the executive function X 100! It stinks!
I’m concerned that you’ve been pushed towards your own burnout trying to people please this week. 😢 while it’s great to see content/ concepts evolving real time, let’s just remember that the reason we are here is that we are at the bleeding edge of self discovery and everyone’s experiences are not the same and finding the right words to please everyone is hard. At this point in time please: Remember, you are a whole, beautiful person worthy of love and respect.. (where did I steal that from?)
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@@MomontheSpectrum just think about it, if this topic were easy, millions of people across the globe wouldn't be misdiagnosed or 'missed diagnosed' by mental health PROFESSIONALS. The fact you're even willing to try and tackle this highly complex topic is amazing. Have these to replace yours which you have gallantly given up over the last week:🥄🥄🥄🥄🥄🥄🥄🥄🥄🥄🥄🥄
Dr Oyalo herbs is really helpful, and have helped my son improve with his speech and social skill complete. My son now responds to name, his aggressive behavior has stoped completely
I started crying when you mentioned some of the symptoms of burnout. I was diagnosed with Asperger's in 96 at 20. I have fought depression since the late '90s and after passing 45 I noticed I lost all love for things I once enjoyed only 5 years earlier. I have always believed I was a burden on society and my parents and that I was worthless due to my diagnosis and not feeling I have contributed to society in any way. The whole time I thought I was depressed and lazy. After watching this video some of it makes sense now. I love those eye masks. I found those probably around 2015 on amazing. I was looking for an alternative to wearing a bandana as a way to block out light.
Dr Oyalo herbs is really helpful, and have helped my son improve with his speech and social skill complete. My son now responds to name, his aggressive behavior has stoped completely
Perimenopause/menopause can also worsen neurodivergence in women. I’m going through this now.
I just recently discovered I’m on the spectrum and I’m dealing with the grief of things I went through that weren’t needed or useful. I was at a point where I was on 12 pills a day, assuming I was bipolar. I was miserable and they always only made things worse. I’m realizing I was experiencing burnout and shutdowns. Such an eye opener.
Did you have muscle pain with your burnout
Dr Oyalo herbs is really helpful, and have helped my son improve with his speech and social skill complete. My son now responds to name, his aggressive behavior has stoped completely
I'm an aspie! I was diagnosed at age 67! Microdosing has helped me so much! I do have major things in my life! (breast cancer diagnosis) but it seems to help in all ways!
This has given me so much to think about. I'm not officially diagnosed ASD, but it is near-certainty. And I'm so burned out almost all the time. My symptoms match your venn diagram for autistic burnout much better than the depression circle. Those times I tried antidepressants, they didn't fix my problems that much.
Most notably, I've experienced a pattern that I've always struggled to understand. I'm very nightowl-ish, and have been diagnosed with a circadian rhythm disorder. In addition to that, however, I experience a pattern of waxing and waning energy nearly every other day. One day I have the energy of a normal adult, the next day is like crawling through molasses, the day after that is back to normal energy, and so on. The good energy days are nowhere near what one would consider hypomania--they are simply what you would expect from a well-rested adult. So I've never taken seriously the notion of ultra-rapid cycling bipolar or anything like that, despite the fact that I'm like two different people on those alternating days--normal person one day, exhausted the next. I've always attributed this pattern to a circadian effect, as if my circadian rhythm were drifting in an out of alignment every-other-day (pulled out of alignment by its natural tendency to drift out of phase and pulled back into alignment due to good sleep hygiene and daily bright light). But this video really has me wondering.
I've been masking for so long, I don't even think about it anymore, but it is subtly draining, not to mention the energy it takes to process everything to the extent that those of us tend to do. The result is I am highly creative and effective in my job...every other day. I wonder if this strange pattern I've experienced my whole life is better explained by daily autistic burnout.
There's another pattern that fits this theory. I travel to scientific conferences for work, which are weeklong marathons of crowded conference centers, scientific conversations, socializing and cacophonous poster sessions. I've noticed I can often go most of the week without crashing (perhaps on adrenaline and a little help from stimulants), but when I return I am often ruined for a week or more. I've often attributed this to jet lag and the time zone changes (something those with circadian disorders are sensitive to), but I wonder how much of this is plainly sensory burnout. I've noticed the same pattern on big vacations as well.
I wonder how many of your viewers with ASD have also been diagnosed with a circadian disorder, or who experience a similar rising/falling energy that may be due to rapidly alternating burnout and recovery.
It sounds like cognitive fatigue. I have an acquired brain injury following a workplace accident. Prior, I was 'neurotypical' and tasks and sensory did not burn me out, I was super driven and high-functioning. Then post-injury, I suffered post-concussion syndrome, and its now considered permanent. What you speak of with having energy one day and not the next, is cognitive fatigue. If I do too much one day, I have less cognitive energy the next, and it takes an abnormal amount of time to recover my energy (I schedule appointments non-consecutive days for this reason). Also, if I over-do it (cognitive & sensory tasks, no matter how fun) for many days in a row, I hit burnout and it takes a week or more to fully recover. It's hard to live like this, but I guess my advice is to find your 'goldilocks zone' when its just the right amount of cognitive challenge for you to sustain without ending up burnout, and when you have to over do it, plan some rest days to follow :) My other advice is to get Loop earplugs or noise-cancelling headphones to limit the sensory overload and thus increase your capacity.
Cardium.rythem disorders are really common in this I've had it all my life I have fybromyalgia CFS check out Dr lenz I didn't no I had asp ADHD heds until 43 sins diagnosis and losing my mum to severe ms
Dr Oyalo herbs is really helpful, and have helped my son improve with his speech and social skill complete. My son now responds to name, his aggressive behavior has stoped completely
That was really helpful when you said that with depression, you don't WANT to do things that you used to enjoy but with burnout, you may want to do them but feel you CAN'T. That really resonates with me. I had major depressive disorder when I was 26 (but didn't know it until a couple of years after it was over) so I've been very aware of how it feels and try to monitor myself for it in case it happens again. I've sought treatment for it at least once since. It's just interesting to note that I've also had burnout at least twice since then but didn't seek depression treatment for it because it felt different. It's interesting to look back and notice the differences in how each feels, even if they are similar, and it's helpful for the future.
Glad this is helpful! I did notice that the can vs. want issue makes a big difference for me to understand as well.
Dr Oyalo herbs is really helpful, and have helped my son improve with his speech and social skill complete. My son now responds to name, his aggressive behavior has stoped completely
For me the hopeless feelings are qualitatively different with burnout and depression. In depression it's more pervasive and seems to come from nowhere and everywhere, whereas the hopelessness I experienced in prolonged burnout was more directly linked to being unable to understand why I was so ineffective and feeling like I'd never be able to fix it. Now that I know what's going on (usually) I'm less hopeless when I start to burn out.
The way you describe their differences seems to be exactly what I've experienced. Like word for word 😳
Dr Oyalo herbs is really helpful, and have helped my son improve with his speech and social skill complete. My son now responds to name, his aggressive behavior has stoped completely
As someone who has experienced both (autism is a very recent diagnosis for me), sometimes separately, this was so useful. My depression was odd that usually didn't involve anhedonia -- i WANTED to do things, but I COULDN'T -- and it was strange to me that it presented so differently. Turns out there was a reason for that!
I always described my experiences of depression as "more functional than emotional". I felt such profound lethargy, urge to self isolate, and increased anxiety etc that I thought it /must/ be depression, even though feelings of hopelessness and sadness were barely present at all (or only presented after a long time in that "depressed"/burnt out state). Discovering that I'm autistic and learning about burnout makes so much of my life experiences make so much more sense.
However I definitely think it is possible for one to lead to the other, and its important not to let the healing isolation from burnout turn into harmful social isolation and understimulation leading to depression.
Dr Oyalo herbs is really helpful, and have helped my son improve with his speech and social skill complete. My son now responds to name, his aggressive behavior has stoped completely
Sounds like you might have alexithymia like I do. I don't feel the emotions of depression or anxiety. There are other emotions I don't fully experience but I don't know what they are.
This is where I'm at right now. I'm so miserable.
Nothing,i eat or drink lately have been satisfying to me . Had a meltdown today. First time in a while.
Just realised that a time where I was struggling after starting a master's degree, whilst working, during lockdown was me going through burnout. I ignored it for so long and had a full on breakdown 9 months later. I was undiagnosed at the time.
Really giving me the tools to reframe my experiences.
I get burnout every winter (or maybe a seasonal depression, but I think it's more of a burnout). At some point it becomes too much, especially around Christmas where you can have exams or end of year pressure at work, gift buying, crowded stores and lots of socialising all together. Add the missing sunlight where I live and... I had a good cry today and looked up this video to seek some more understanding of what's up. Looking back I've always struggled with this since at least middle school. I thought it was depression, but burnout rings a lot more true.
Dr Oyalo herbs is really helpful, and have helped my son improve with his speech and social skill complete. My son now responds to name, his aggressive behavior has stoped completely
I dont know why the begining of the video made me think of this, but doesnt anyone else have trouble talking to objects like they are people? I have a hard time talking on the phone, cameras, discord and to smart home devices because it's doesnt feel like I'm talking to a person. I intellectually understand when there is a person there but its like my emotions don't believe me.
I'm the opposite, it's much easier to talk to a camera or a pet or stuffed animal or something, than to most humans. The camera can't interrupt or get angry or offended or upset by its interpretation of my tone or words. I can tend to get derailed by the other human's reactions to me. It has to be a very special close person who really "gets" me for that not to happen.
Yesssssss...... ik it's been 7months but I can't stress this yes enough. Of all the barriers and struggles in my lifetime, this one has had the most impact of my day to day functioning and sometimes like I really can't make the phone call bc I just can't.... and zoom appointments with Dr ends in me "yes I'm fine everything is fine" when my meds need adjusted but I just want off there, it's the strangest feeling tbh.
I hear you and agree. It’s the Apathy with depression that is my major key clue. If I have zero cares- to the degree that everything just feels muted down and pointless.
Thank you for pointing out the food differences! It dawned on me that nothing tastes or sounds good when depressed but I’m still okay with my “comfort/safe” foods during burnout.
Dr Oyalo herbs is really helpful, and have helped my son improve with his speech and social skill complete. My son now responds to name, his aggressive behavior has stoped completely
i feel so understood with this. i know i wasn't depressed, but i got this symptop that makes me think, am i depressed? then whenever i say i'm tired and i don't want to go, people would mock me saying, what do you even do to make you feel so tired. once i said maybe i experienced burnout to a friend, then i notice how she scoffed at me when she thought i didn't see. i never speak about myself to anyone else after that simply thinking i was just weird and get easily overwhelmed by things. it's making me feel sad because i'm tired being with people now. i make friends and connection when i was okay, but when i got overwhelmed i just shut out and they don't take it well. it makes more sense now.
I have recently realized that I am autistic. I also have CPTSD and ADHD. I am in love with your videos. I relate to you so much! I also love psychology and neuroscience. When you mentioned Besser van der Kolk, I had to reach out and say something. Your videos make me feel so much more 'normal', bc now I know I'm not the only one!
Dr Oyalo herbs is really helpful, and have helped my son improve with his speech and social skill complete. My son now responds to name, his aggressive behavior has stoped completely
this was invaluable in helping me differentiate between the "i dont wannas" and the "i just cants".... especially re the tactics to move forwards. i'm still recovering from nearly a year of what i think was the most epic burnout of my life in the late pandemic... trying to teach my brain that it's not "lazy" to respect my internal needs :/
Dr Oyalo herbs is really helpful, and have helped my son improve with his speech and social skill complete. My son now responds to name, his aggressive behavior has stoped completely
For me burnout and shutdown are very similar, almost longer and smaller versions of themselves respectively. Meltdowns are another beast entirely, I've only had a handful in my lifetime and only under incredible stress or around toxic ppl. Basically its an intense outburst of anger or emotions that force me to make physical movements to relieve them, hitting pillows, screaming at the top of my voice or flinging my arms around. Its incredibly embarrassing and I try my best to walk away from these kind of situations now.
When I hit a burnout really suddenly this past spring, the marriage counselor I was working with at the time dismissed my self diagnosis in favor of anxiety or depression. And I was SO frustrated, because yes, I was anxious - but that was a RESULT of feeling like I couldn't do things that I wanted to do, and I was worried about how to recover that function.
And that, I think is where some of the overlaps can come from...if you are stuck in burnout it is easy for that to turn into anxiety, depression, or suicidal ideation, because you don't feel like yourself and are FULLY AWARE that things are falling apart, but may not know how to fix it.
omg I completely relate how with people quickly saying 'oh you're just anxious, that's why you're having trouble with your brain' - No, I'm anxious BECAUSE my brain cognition is tiring (cognitive fatigue). It's vulnerable when you start processing slower and mix up words and feel hard to get self to do stuff.. it causes anxiety, or what I like to call a feeling of overwhelm.
Dr Oyalo herbs is really helpful, and have helped my son improve with his speech and social skill complete. My son now responds to name, his aggressive behavior has stoped completely
Ok, we get it. Stop posting this same comment over and over already.
Thanks Taylor! I agree with your distinctions between burnout and depression. Before I knew I was autistic, I used to try to force myself to socialize when I was in burnout because I thought that it would help. Turns out it only made things worse! Now that I understand burnout better, I am better at caring for myself.
Also, love the manta mask! Got the weighted one because of your recommendation. I now use it every time I sleep. Especially great for daytime naps.
Awesome! Thanks so much for your comment and especially the manta feedback! So glad you love yours as much as I love mine ☺️
Dr Oyalo herbs is really helpful, and have helped my son improve with his speech and social skill complete. My son now responds to name, his aggressive behavior has stoped completely
You explained it so well. I even sent this one to my therapist. I told her this is her homework for next week. I wish I found this video before today. My session starts in less than ten minutes.
I’m perfectly happy being alone. I’m 47, on my second marriage, he works mostly out of town, my kids are grown, but live in the same town. My dad, sister and brother all live a thousand miles away, they know I’m alone most of the time. They always tell me I shouldn’t be alone. “It’s not healthy.”
But for me, it’s the most freeing healthy thing there is! I talk to myself. Out loud. And a lot. 😂. It helps me understand myself. It’s pretty much addictive.
The guilt is so real with burnout. I knew all of this because I've been going over it with my therapist, but I've also been keeping it a secret from my mom because I'm not ready to face her inevitable accidental invalidation if I don't present it with all the facts clearly written out for her. I watched this video to come up with a good list of points to start with, but just the thought of trying to expend that kind of mental energy made me faceplant into my pillow and lay there for a minute straight.
I wish it was easierrrr 😂 but videos like this help. Thank you so much. 😊
Thank you Dr Oyalo for healing my son from autism. And I want to share about him to every one. His herbs has made my son verbal and Improve in social skills
The worst thing is that, during a period of autistic burnout, I am witnessing my physical, mental and emotional health deplete…I am watching my social network grow quiet…and it’s like there is nothing I can do to stop it because I don’t have the capacity to function in the way I did before that made my daily life possible. When I have experienced long periods of serious depression, I didn’t care that those things were happening. But autistic burnout is truly heartbreaking as you watch yourself go from tired and stressed to absolutely critical in your level of self care. It’s not voluntary and it really takes empathy to have the patience to rest instead of push because that is the opposite of what you feel would logically and reasonably work. Thanks for this video. It’s so validating.
I just want to say thanks to your videos I went forward and asked for an autism assessment and last week I got my official diagnosis, also been referred for ADHD. It’s been an emotional rollercoaster but your videos have helped so much, I finally fit somewhere ❤
Dr Oyalo herbs is really helpful, and have helped my son improve with his speech and social skill complete. My son now responds to name, his aggressive behavior has stoped completely
I've recently discovered the Neurodivergent Woman podcast, and it's fantastic! The last season included episodes on ASD vs. ADHD vs. AuDHD and on autistic burnout. Suuuuper informative and helpful for me. Highly recommend.
Thank you Dr Oyalo for healing my son from autism. And I want to share about him to every one. His herbs has made my son verbal and Improve in social skills
Thank you for these videos! They really helped me a lot to process what's going on with me and to distinguish my conditions. It was especially valuable to learn that my inability to play my instruments (I am a professional musician and composer) is not the depression but a burnout that's going on for years, because I really want to play but I cannot make my body move and start doing that and sometimes I start feeling physically sick when I force myself too much.
The itchiness and wanting to get out of my skin because I feel claustrophobic is soooo familiar but until that moment, I didn't realise that it's a sign of a coming meltdown/burnout. Stimming with my toes is something that I just realised too - somehow I didn't really pay attention to it since I do it my entire life and it's become an integral part of my physical living, hence I ignore it the way I do with breathing, blinking, etc.
Dr Oyalo herbs is really helpful, and have helped my son improve with his speech and social skill complete. My son now responds to name, his aggressive behavior has stoped completely
The last minute made me cry after getting my burnout trying to prove im normal by having a 40 hour work week for 1.5 year and always being told im not good enough by anyone except for my mom. Thank you so much
Thank you Dr Oyalo for healing my son from autism. And I want to share about him to every one. His herbs has made my son verbal and Improve in social skills
I'm a man and I think I have undiagnosed autism? Almost every autism-related video that pops is geared towards women but they're still very helpful (I can't bring myself to specifically seek out a man to talk to me through the screen, y'know? I don't know). Thank you!
Maybe you'll like Adult with Autism, his name is Paul. He's got quite a few video's up.
I just wanted to say "Thank You" again for taking the time to make this content. I literally went through an autistic burnout five days ago to where I couldn't think straight and could barely function. Up until now, I've always thought that I could force myself to push through anything. I've never hit a point of such hopelessness and indifference and then feeling guilty for not getting needed things done. Took me all weekend to recover. Watching this video, it was as though Taylor was reading my mail...
Thanks Taylor, this video really helped me make sense of what I went through this last weekend and why. Also drove home the point that I'm not invincible and need to start listening to what my body and more specifically what my nervous system is telling me... I guess I also need to start listening to my wife and daughter more as they both saw it coming. Again, Sincerely Thank You Taylor
i was first diagnosed with depression which was helpful. I was then diagnosed with bipolar with meant that i began taking meds. They helped to some degree but didnt resolve everything. I was then, after many many sessions diagnosed with ADHD. This helped me a lot, not only because of the meds, but also the diagnosis and knowledge. However, I always felt that my bipolar and depression diagnoses (diagnosises) were off track, and it was only when i identified these symptoms with autistic burnout that i realised that i’d been terribly misdiagnosed. My ADHD hyperfocus had been recognised as hypomania. And my burnout had been identified as depression. Together i had been diagnosed with rapid cycle depression, and my ADHD had complicated things by making my terrible task initiation look like depression even more so.
Thank you Dr Oyalo for healing my son from autism. And I want to share about him to every one. His herbs has made my son verbal and Improve in social skills
I would love to sit on a park bench with you someday. I know it won't happen. But you completely understand my brain. And I am having such a hard time helping people understand my brain.
🌳 🪑🪑 🌳 🌸
Thank you. I have been diagnosed with depression many many times in my 45 years. There is so much in my life that made that and PTSD seem like a well, duh thing. Abuse, abandonment, job failure to name the highlights. However, I think these may have often coincided with burnout after listening to this video. It explains why retreating into self was not only so intensely longed for in these down times but also what so often soothed me. Everyone around me from therapists and clergy to family and co-workers has worried my retreats mean I am sure to resort to self-harm, especially as I did have some suicidal ideation in my past ( not something I have had in any frequency in a long time, by the way) . However, I can trace back the times I was actually regulating self and drawing on the things which strengthen me-my art, my writing, my favorite books, films, television. Or, just simply sitting and being. I have only just stumbled on you, but feel like you are speaking into my experience. Having two kids on the spectrum, being self-diagnosed, and married to one whose diagnosis as a child was not disclosed to him by his mother until he was 35, I have spent time in many facets of the autism community from discussing to advocating to writing to promoting said writing ( this last produced some of my deepest burnout, hence writing is currently on the shelf) but it has been hard sometimes to find a place. I don't know if it's my admitted long-windedness or rampant self-doubts or what some might call "painful shyness", but I cannot seem to find connections, even in places like this. At any rate, all that to say I appreciate this video and this space you have created for moms on the spectrum like me. Blessings to you.
Dr Oyalo herbs is really helpful, and have helped my son improve with his speech and social skill complete. My son now responds to name, his aggressive behavior has stoped completely
Ive been diagnosed with major depressive disorder. My son is autistic and Ive wondered for a while if I am too. After watching your video I think I may also be suffering from autistic burnout. The depression is accurate I think. But Ive felt there is something else for a long time.
Dr Oyalo herbs is really helpful, and have helped my son improve with his speech and social skill complete. My son now responds to name, his aggressive behavior has stoped completely
I was just recently diagnosed with AuDHD after 30 years of feeling I was different. My ASD is level 2 but every one I've told seems to think I'm high functioning. After watching this video I think my autistic burnout lead to my depression. Thank you for you videos and being a resource. Have followed since I started suspecting I might be autistic and now I'm finally leaning in in the learning.
❤🥰💕
I've been having these hardcore burnouts throughout my life, and I never knew why and how to make my life sustainable so that I don't have to spends months ignoring all social interactions and recovering in my cave.
Now I've discovered that I'm autistic (self diagnosed so far, but like 99,999999999% sure, because I recognise myself in everything I read or hear about it).
I'm so overwhelmed by this realization. My life makes so much more sense now 😭 I'm about to turn 30.
Very useful info... before I self diagnosed, I went through a major professional burnout during covid. I I let it worsen for months, until I was able to spot how abusive social situations felt for me.
I had severe mental stimming, like bits of songs that would repeat non stop night and day, major anger issues, and I would have ended punching someone.
The doctor was very impressed by my symptoms, never guessed it was autistic burnout, neither did the psychiatrist, and they prescribed anti depression medication.... 😢
Matter of fact, the symptoms actually subsided very fast as soon as I was taken out of work/social situations !
I'm 56, learning to spot burnout situations, and trying to avoid going too far into them.
I am not at all prone to depression.
Cant believe health professionals cannot make the difference with autism....
Thanks for shedding a light on this !
I was late diagnosed in late 2023. I also have alexithymia and one of the 2 main emotions I've identified I don't "FEEL" is depression and the other is anxiety. There are quite a few more emotions I don't feel or are very disconnected from. I'm sure I am still depressed, I just never know it or "feel" it. I think alexithymia really adds a lot more complexity and even difficulty to Autism/being Autistic. Since I don't always know what I am feeling, it's hard to be self-aware of problems like depression. Imagine you are so disconnected from (insert emotion), you don't even know you have it.
Giving yourself grace is one of the big messages I've really taken to heart from Taylor's advice.
Thank you! I'm self diagnosed autistic and I keep forgetting I've watched this video several times now. I have been so tired lately, I could just nap all day long. I'm unmotivated, overwhelmed but also bored, like I'm stuck and I don't know what it is I need to feel better. And every time this happens I wonder what could be wrong with me. And then I see this video and it's a deja vu, like how could I forget that this is the burnout cycle that I've lived in my whole life! Nothing new but still something I keep ignoring and forgetting that happens if I don't listen to myself (which I'm not very good at yet, I am 31).
🥺😔😪.....I'm really struggling.
Burnout & shutdown.
Thank you for updating this, take care of yourself
Thank you very much - I am a late-diagnosed ASD as well, who has been going through burnout for SO LONG! and I always just thought it was depression. I have lost so many friends and family because of ADHD and ASD. They did not have the patience nor the understanding to just encourage. Right now I am facing the making excuses level - as those that remain do not think that being ADHD and ASD is a real thing. Thank you for your info, and help.
Dr Oyalo herbs is really helpful, and have helped my son improve with his speech and social skill complete. My son now responds to name, his aggressive behavior has stoped completely
SI can be significant in burnout. I think it depends on how deep / long lasting the burnout is. Assuming that people in burnout don't have SI or that SI is not a significant problem for people in burnout can trivialise burnout and feel rather judgemental to those who are currently in that nightmare. It feels (again) like no one understands and even those who are supposed to be our people, are dismissive and invalidating our experiences
So I wanted to comment about depression, and I'll speak only for myself. I don't feel sadness. Sadness would be an improvement. What I have is apathy. Apathy for myself and my environment. I want to take care of myself but everything has to make it past this enormous apathy hurdle. And what doesn't get sucked into the gaping black hole of nothingness feels like it's trying to work itself through multiple layers of heavy, wet wool blankets. Emotions are muted or fleeting. Even on medication the apathy is still there, I've got slightly more energy and I'm not as angry (the only emotion that would regularly make it through with any kind of strength was anger). And when I do feel sadness, it's usually centered around this apathy that depression leaves me with. I genuinely don't know or remember if I've ever really been happy or what 'me' even looks like because this condition just robs you everything that makes you human and alive
Yeah this is also me
Often times after a lifetime of being invalidated ... Thanks for the information. Really resonate!
I decided to take a leave from work in August and am still off. I was feeling so incredibly depleted, I ended up getting to a point that reflected some of the depression symptoms you talked about. So my doctor put me on anti depressants ( one that helps with anxiety as well ) the first two weeks made me feel like I was living in a fishbowl or seeing everything through foggy glass. My mind is a bit quieter now, but, it's been a month since I started the medication and the tiredness, inability to do things, and irritability remain.
I am currently being assessed but have no diagnosis yet. Lots of imposter syndrome. But, this video really helped put things into perspective for me as it doesn't feel like the meds and therapy have been helping change the issue which is my inability to do anything due to lack of energy and motivation.
I've also found that my appetite is different like you talked about and that was very validating. I.will only consume foods that sound appealing ( which is basically my safe foods as I've been experiencing the "big Ick" with all other foods.
Anyway, thank you. Im hoping my follow-up appointment for my assessment happens within the next couple weeks.
Medications alone can't solve emotional problems. Your brain contains trillions of neurons which are wired in a way that makes you feel depressed. A drug basically just heightens of lowers the activity of all of those neurons in more or less the same way. It's like turning the volume up or down... without changing the channel on the radio. If you don't like the music, then you still won't like the music at a different volume setting, either. You have to find out what music you like and then you have to be willing to turn that dial. That's a hard and often costly process. Good luck!
Thank you Dr Oyalo for healing my son from autism. And I want to share about him to every one. His herbs has made my son verbal and Improve in social skills
I hadn't thought of this! Thank you!
Also cried a bit when you said with such certainty "there is nothing wrong with you". .. so thank you. :)
Absolutely!! You are a beautiful human being. So nice to be connected with you. :)
I never really recognized it as stemming until recently, but I have always twirled my hair and tied it into knots. I never noticed it until I started learning more about Autism. I do it almost compulsively, and have since I was a young child.
When I'm in burnout, my chronic fatigue gets so much worse. During the worst of it, I was sleep walking and would blackout shutting my alarms off or my mom waking me up every morning. The number of times she has "woken me up" and i've had full conversations with her or even gotten out of bed with no memory is unreal. Also, for me personally su!cidal ideation is more of a meltdown/lack of emotional permanence thing rather than burnout or depression! So interesting how there can be many root causes for those types of thoughts.
Thank you Dr Oyalo for healing my son from autism. And I want to share about him to every one. His herbs has made my son verbal and Improve in social skills
That's really a commitment, reshooting the whole video due to community feedback :)
I feel that I have burn out and depression together. I'm completely alone. I have no family or friends of my own and my husband makes things worse because he does not understand and respect my autistic needs. I have an appointment tomorrow and a busy weekend ahead of me and I can only cry because I can't do it anymore, I'm exhausted, and no one wants to help me.
I just want to thank you for doing these videos. This is the first time I've ever related to someone so much and felt so seen. I've never been diagnosed but I've been binging your videos and I'm going to talk to a health professional because my entire life makes so much more sense now. I can't thank you enough for the work you do. ❤❤ You are amazing.
Dr Oyalo herbs is really helpful, and have helped my son improve with his speech and social skill complete. My son now responds to name, his aggressive behavior has stoped completely
Suicidal ideation with depression may be a feeling of hopelessness, but I definitely get it with autistic burnout as a feeling of utter depletion and critical exhaustion. I've gone to bed MANY nights thinking it would be a blessing if I died in my sleep because I just don't have the energy to get up in the morning and do all of this again. It's definitely a different feeling from hopelessness.
I've been learning about autism for a couple years, and I'm autistic af (even though I'm 27 and undiagnosed). I started having kids at 24, and I'm pretty sure I've been increasingly burned out ever since. I see videos of people "closing down" their house for the night with cleaning and picking up, but I was confused about who would have the energy for that. I stopped that when my son was 9 mos. And that's what tipped me off that maybe being so tired isn't "normal".
I have been through a few autistic burnouts without even recognizing it. It really does explain how my emotions got to be so explosive at some points
Stressed out? Are my cuticles bleeding again? Am i posting comments on every video i find intresting up into the wee hours? Autism schmautism just another day. 😊😊😊
I laugh only at myself and cry for the woes of the world. Thaks for the great content.😊
Scrunching our toes is stimming - brilliant observations!
This was helpful. It helps me know that my body is just overwhelmed & I need rest & alone time ❤
So glad it was helpful to you. Yes rest is so important!
Thanks for your comment
Hi Tay, thank you for your kindness.
You are so welcome
I was diagnosed bipolar in my early twenties, I have just been diagnosed autistic at the age of 50. I’ve been told I have both but I’m really confused as to what symptoms are to which condition and feel like I don’t know myself at all. Thankyou for the video to help with this
Thank you. I’ve been in burnout/shutdown for a few weeks. It’s affects so much. My children. My career. It’s overwhelming and almost hopeless 😢
Absolutely not that it’s not a desire to do it, I literally can’t. It’s horrible. I’m so grateful that have found your channel. Thank you so much ❤
i hope you’re doing better now
Thank you! I needed this video. I've been battling for awhile. You helped me answer questions about myself that I've had since I was a child.
You’re very welcome. So glad the video was helpful.
Update is great, Tay. Thanks so much!
Thank you, thank you... love from Scotland 💖
I feel suicidal ideation in burnout because I feel like I'm not enough and I can't fulfil the role I'm 'meant' to have in this ableist world. Especially with female autism I feel like this is so prevalent because women have to mask so much (even neurotypical ones!), feeling socially inept and a failure on top of dealing with how hard it is to be autistic. It really depletes and degrades your self esteem to the point where its virtually nonexistent. I feel this deeply as I'm still waiting for a clinical assessment, and no one every picked up that I could be autistic so I've literally spent my whole life just feeling like an alien and a flop - very much still have suicidal ideation whenever I reach burnout
Thank you Dr Oyalo for healing my son from autism. And I want to share about him to every one. His herbs has made my son verbal and Improve in social skills
I completely agree and have identical feelings of suicidal ideation when I reach burnout and that I have no worth.
Thank you. Nice message
Imagine if we lived in a world where we would honor our natural world’s seasons - time to rest, time to play, time to work, time to pray/meditate ❤️ imagine if we honored our body’s seasons.
Thank you for this!
Your channel is really life changing! Thank you so much!❤
Being honest is more important than being kind
i think in a lot of ways that being honest = being kind
Taylor, once again thank you for your help & time , genuine care and concern.
Thank you Taylor
Omg thank you so much for sharing! ❤
thank you for the information.
❤ Thank you.❤ I'm crying from feeling better.❤
Thank you 🙏 This helps a lot 🌟
This is actually a really good overview, thanks a bunch
Thank you Taylor ! I appreciate you for sharing these thoughts and the weighted sleep mask.
I find it extremely intriguing that this video showed up in my feed at the same time that I'm in the process of seeing a VA psych for ADHD and possible depression, according to the screening doc.
I was diagnosed last year with Autism and ADHD, so this video is a good primer/reminder on these topics. Thank you.
Im so glad i watched this, ive definitely been experiencing alot of burnout lately and i am just coming to the conclusion that im 90% sure im autistic. I never really noticed as much until i had kids, they often trigger my burnout because im always at home with them and dont get any alone time at all, and im currently nursing my third baby. I love my kids but i just dont like being touched all the time and i cant really escape that rn. For the longest time i thought i was depressed or something but its just because i dont get time to recoop
Great updated video. Very helpful ❤
Thank you. Very insightful :)
So seriously, just thankful for you.
💓
This was really, really helpful. thank you so much for your work on this channel. espeically the very last things you said. brought me to tears. Thank you.
Thank you so much. I finally understand
Really helpful information:)
Thank you for saying my brain is beautiful I needed that 😢
Thank you this video helped me to understand what i am processing.
This was great, thank you! A note on stimming that I've noticed in several videos: you limit stimming to physical movements only. However, my primary stim is vocal. I'll sing the same song, or piece of song, over and over. Or I hum if I can't sing. My daughter does the same. We will even co-stim by singing, its one of the ways I help her co-regulate with me. She also will say the same words over and over and over. We will verbal stim when we're happy as well as overwhelmed. For physical stims: I know that I used to stim as a child by the same repetitive rubbing on a blanket, but I've repressed and lost most of my physical stims (but I find knitting or crochet to be very close for me.) My daughter also uses physical stims still, because hers weren't quashed. If you changed your definition to include not only physical stims, but verbal too, I think it would help be more inclusive. Thank you for all that you do for the community! (Here is an article about verbal stims www.autismparentingmagazine.com/autism-children-vocal-stimming/)
Oh, oh wow, you just made me realize why I sing so much. I have some go-tos for when I'm cooking or doing small tasks. And I _need_ to sing while working otherwise I just start to get more and more stressed and anxious (so glad I can work from home now and not bother anyone with this).
I used to repeat things people said I found funny, till I was told I was being seriously annoying and forced myself to stop. Still do it sometimes for videos, when listening to funny compilations and there's no one around to annoy.
I'm looking into if I might be autistic (and adhd) for the past month or so because quite a few friends of mine who are one or the other said I might also be and yeah, the more I look into this the more I think so too. So I'm so glad to hear that vocal stimming is a thing! I've really only heard of physical movement stims and sure they can be fine and I do do some, but there's something way more soothing with singing.
Have a nice day! :)
Just as there can be sensory issues with any of our senses, are there also stims and sensory joy for any of them. So, unless your harming yourself or others (in this case, please seek professional help or alternative stims), just keep stimming!
Thank you Dr Oyalo for healing my son from autism. And I want to share about him to every one. His herbs has made my son verbal and Improve in social skills
I love that you crochet! Crochet has become my hyper fixation and my therapy for the past three years or so and it is amazing. I love it so much.
I am blown away with how informative these videos are. I am wondering if there are any videos or advice on how to inform someone they are likely autistic. Such a tricky and difficult topic.
Really helpful video - thanks for sharing 😁