10 More Female Autistic Traits | AUTISM IN GIRLS
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- Опубліковано 4 чер 2024
- I'm Olivia Hops and welcome to my channel! Today’s video is about another 10 Female Autistic Traits that affect me on a regular basis!
In this video, I talk about 10 more autistic traits that affect me on a regular basis. I go over needing a routine, my bad habit of burning bridges, masking, and special interests.
Many times when boys and girls have similar autistic traits, males get diagnosed, but females often do not. Females tend to get diagnosed only when their autistic traits are significantly and visibly debilitating. Clinicians are missing many girls who are on the less disabling end of the autism spectrum because we are often so good at hiding our autistic traits.
Although these traits are very common in girls and women, boys and men can have them, too! Traits are not exclusive to one gender. Also, please remember that not everyone will have these traits. Every autistic person is different, just like every neurotypical person is! And just because you have some of these traits does not make you autistic, and just because you DON'T have some of these traits doesn't make you NOT autistic. Only a doctor can officially diagnosis.
Girls are so often misdiagnosed or go undiagnosed with autism until well into adulthood. Please help spread awareness to girls and women on the spectrum by sharing this video. My goal with this video is to help other people "figure themselves out," just like my adult autism diagnosis did for me. Getting young girls diagnosed could change their lives and allow them to not deal with as many of the struggles I did growing up because I had no idea what was "wrong" with me.
10 More Female Autistic Traits:
• Masking
• Burnout
• Bridge Burning
• Few Friends/Prefer Males/Prefer Adults/Prefer 1 on 1 Time
• Special Interests
• Overshare
• Struggle with Hygiene
• Confused About Sexuality
• Superior IQ
• Need Routines
Aspergirls Book Link: www.amazon.com/Aspergirls-Emp...
Autism spectrum disorder is a condition that affects the way people behave, socialize, and communicate with others. This disorder is commonly referred to simply as autism. It used to be broken down into sub-types, such as Asperger’s syndrome, but it’s now treated as a condition with a wide-ranging spectrum of symptoms and severity.
Please enjoy and make sure to watch the video until the end to gain extra knowledge! Thank you so much for watching and I will see you in the next one!
If you like the video, please SUBSCRIBE and don't forget to press the bell 🔔, 👍like, comment and share. Stay safe and love to all!
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▶️ Other Contents:
• I was Groomed as an Autistic Teen: • I was Groomed as an Au...
• How Autism Affects Mental Health: • How Autism Affects Men...
• Autism and Relationships Part 2: • Autism and Relationshi...
• 9 Childhood Autistic Traits in Girls: • 9 Childhood Autistic T...
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#autistictraits #autismingirls #OliviaHops #autismgirls #autismspectrum #femaleswithautism #autisticfemales #asdtraits # aspergers #autism #autistic #asd #ActuallyAutistic
With struggling with personal hygiene, I think some of it is due to us having a hard time with transitions. Like transitioning from one thing to another. For example, it’s a struggle to transition from say the bed to the shower, but once you are there in the shower, it’s easy. It’s a struggle to transition to get up and brush your teeth, but once started, it is easy. It’s the mustering the energy to transition from one activity to another that is the hard part. I am sure it’s a combination of things that make it so difficult, but I believe this is on the list.
Thank you, I really resonate with this.
I agree! I've never been diagnosed (my daughter has), but after watching her videos, suspect that I may be on the spectrum. Transitions are SO hard for me and my daughter!
I just happened to read your comment and it is so well put! I myself have my own struggles, but your comment made me feel some what “understood “ for the first time! Thanks for that.
I think you're right.
Mustering up to transition into doing something is hard allot of times. I use to be a preschool teacher and would get up at 5:00 to be at work by 8:00. Sometimes I would feel my heart sink and want to cry just having to get up. I would muster up the energy and learned to try not to think to much to get up and into shower. Like you said once you're doing it, it's fine. I would feel stupid knowing I wanted to cry over it. I just didn't get why i was like that and still do that over things. Now I finally know why at age 52.
I'm ok with taking a shower, but I hate becoming wet after being dry and vice versa, so when I'm already in the water I hate the idea of getting out, but when I'm not taking a shower I resent the idea of getting wet
I hate being wet.
Yeah, I think that explains why I do not take showers or baths as often as I should also.
@@DeborahAnnsuperversatile Same. But to be fair to myself I also have very dry skin and hair so it's not really necessary.
Same
I hate being out in the rain. Love hot showers and swimming, though. Just don't like getting wet when I have no say in the matter.
I’m 49 years old and just looking into the possibility that I might be on the spectrum. Since researching autism in girls, I have never felt more understood. I have everyone of these traits. Everyone! I’m so glad I’m not alone and there’s an explanation to the way I’ve been my entire life.
Ditto here at 36.
47 and have many/several of the traits Olivia mentioned.. It's like there's some really 'ding ding' light bulb moments; as if the dots are being joined. Do you feel the same?
I’m 50 and just now thinking that too
52 and a half (why is that important to me?) and my daughter identified me as on the spectrum when taking her teaching certification class.
I will be 53 next month and just discovering this fits me to a T!
Videos like these astound me, because for almost 15 min it's strange to hear someone else talk about how much they understand me. It's been a crazy two years learning this about why I never wanted to date boys as a young girl and obsessed over hobbies instead. How there are other people who forget to shower or eat because they're so hyper-focused on an interest. About leaving jobs and friends in a moment due to things I couldn't communicate, and how you can mask so well everyone thinks you're their friend, but no one really knows "you." The you that can sit in a quiet room for almost an entire day thinking about one topic, almost not even moving. Forgetting to use the restroom or get dressed or text back. It was an isolated, confusing world until I found this side of UA-cam.
Facts
Thanks
Damn. You just described my life.
"everyone thinks you're their friend, but no one really knows 'you'." Dang, I have never felt so seen. Thank you for relating.
I have this aswell. I have all of these ten things I don't know what to do
I’ve been diving down the autism rabbit hole (fun and frustrating) and now I’m really annoyed that it took me so long to realize my autism (I’m 70). I knew my nephew was autistic, but it presents so differently in boys and men. And despite being an educated medical professional, no one noticed mine. But then again, the label would have been much more problematic when I was younger. Pre internet and pre acceptance (at least a little acceptance). Thank you for your approach to this fascinating landscape we inhabit. 😸
It is good to keep learning, including learning about ourselves! Welcome to the "club", I am learning about this at age 52.
I will be 64 this year, I now have a much better understanding of my childhood and realize I most definitely am on the spectrum. Oddly it was very bad when I was young, after i was married had children it mellowed out. Now within the last 10years it is increasingly worse again
Yes, I believe back when our parents or guardians or whoever took care of us didn't get to know there was more than shelter, feeding and clothing us. I've often thought why do I burn bridges. Going to be 69 this year it's been hard for some of us not knowing and now to get the knowledge to us so we can help others.
I'm very glad that you've figured this out
Oh well, I turned 80 and only recently started trying to figure out what’s wrong with me. I’ve been interested before but will burnout sporadically.
I’ve bridge burned my entire life and it’s one of my least favourite thing about my autism. I think this trait and our emotional dysregulation are major reasons we get misdiagnosed with borderline personality
And our masking!! We can act completely different depending on what group of people we're with.
@@OliviaHops completely! it’s like being a chameleon and not knowing what colour you’re suddenly reflecting
I don't even burn too many bridges but I still was misdiagnosed with BPD because of my emotional regulation problems and self harm.
Bipolar is another one. I recently got diagnosed with that after one 25 minute appt with a brand new psychiatrist!!!!! 🤦🏼♀️
Maybe I have it, maybe I don't, but regardless I know I've masked as soon as I learned how to but couldn't mask the emotional meltdowns.
Omg! You are such a blessing I'm in tears. My adult daughter suffers from every trait in your video and the comments written. I've asked countless therapist about the autism possibility and they all have said no because she's a wiz at school but meltdowns are crippling. Thank you, thank you, thank you!
I also DESPISE taking showers 😭 finally someone who understands! I hate the feeling afterwards when everything is wet, you dribble everywhere, you are cold and everything’s just a DISASTER 😭😱 When I was a child, my father had to bribe me into taking showers by allowing me to call grandma and complain about it afterwards 😅😂
Honestly, I shower just because if I smelled too much people wouldn’t want to be around me. I try to be considerate.🤭
Funnily enough, I don’t mind rain 🤷♀️
Omg! Thanks for sharing your super relatable story!! You are not alone lol! Also, I LOVE rain! Being outside in the rain is a dream for me. So weird!
@@OliviaHops I swam in the rain a couple of times in my childhood: once in a lake and once in the sea. So so so good! (I do dislike showers)
I hate getting wet in rain, showers, swimming pools. Warm pools of water are a little more tempting.
I hate taking showers too... 😔😔😔 And don't like Rain either....
@@Catlily5 I'm like this, too. The idea of getting into a pool of any type, especially an unfiltered one, creeps the shiz out of me because of the grossness of the wetness and everything that's in it that can stick to my skin!!!! 🤢
Taking showers...... OMG it takes me hours to get into one!!!!!!
I have to wear shower shoes and cannot tolerate the water pooling in the tub and touching my feet!!! 😱😱
That explains so much of me and why I hate having to constantly change my bed, I would be happy if I never changed it again. It also explains why I get so tired so easily, it drives me nuts, I constantly feel lazy and hate it.
You’re not alone, Jeanette! Remember, you are NOT lazy. I know it’s hard to tell yourself that but you really aren’t. Keep fighting and God Bless 💙
Lol I'm just the opposite.Some where along life long road I minted in my brain I must strip my bed every week.No excuses.
Feeling depleted constantly is one of the worst things about autism.
I am with you!
I have struggled with getting tired and having no ability to care for myself or my surroundings my entire life. I have a lot of guilt about it despite working with differently abled adults and understanding what was going on with them I never could quite identify it in myself and give my self the grace to rest up. Only since I worked to get my kids diagnosed have O realized that I'm not just depressed and lazy I'm overwhelmed and over stimulated. I spend more of my weekends resting and relaxing now
Almost 70 and I relate to so much of this I could cry. Now I understand why I thought I didn’t fit in. I got pretty good at masking but the older I got the more exhausted I got from any social interaction. I always felt like people were uncomfortable around me. What a horrible disease.
You don't have a disease. You're literally just wired differently and uniquely.
It's not a disease. And there are many great sides to having an autistic brain. I wouldn't change it if I could.
That's me, I am 54 now... I'm masking in the way people love me, but I'm ever more exhausted with this masking.
I haven't heard the bridge burning thing yet, but it resonates with me a lot. My whole life is about leaving my past behind me and not being reminded or confronted with it. It's just a series of painful experiences and I was always hoping something better can be found moving forward.
Burnout is the worst. I am 46 and am just coming to understand burnout and what leads to it for me. It’s difficult, especially when you are responsible for other people on top of being burned out.
I so relate to that!
OMG BRIDGE BURNING!! I DIDN'T KNOW IT WAS A THING! I just always thought I was bad at confrontation! I cannot believe it is an actual thing!
Same here, that made so much sense to me too!
Wow, this is me too!
Same here! It explains how I have surgically removed people from my life when they become too much.
@@sylviajohnston-algiere2705 and sometimes they become too overwhelming. Born as a baby boomer, none of this was ever brought to light. I did what was demanded of me. But still defied them it wasn't easy because I was raised by old people who believed their way was the right way... Thank you so many of us who are older didn't understand why we had to go through what we did.
I am 31, almost 32 and have worked with the autistic community for 10+ years, but only this past year realized I am 100% on the spectrum myself. It's been overwhelming in a way that my whole life makes sense to me now and why I am the way I am, but your videos are so so so validating Olivia I am legitimately in tears right now.
I laughed out loud when you said “I’m not just a lazy bum” omg, so relatable 😂💕
So glad I’m not the only one! 🤣
@@OliviaHops Great video Olivia.
Olivia, great video again....it allows me to understand my adult daughter who was misdiagnosed and knows herself she was. So many traits, burnout, obsessive about horses, music etc, missing social cues and loving her own company. Thanks so much for explaining. Great you can be yourself you are so lovely! 😀
It took me 9 years to grind through college because I kept shutting down and tak8ng semesters off. If I had known back then what I know now...
Over the course of high school I was sure that my social awkwardness and anxiety was starting to go away… turns out I was just getting better at masking 😭
oh man, this totally explained my preference for male friends!! I had no idea that this was a potential asd trait, but how you explained it completely makes sense.
I certainly prefer male FRIENDS but not for them to try to leave the friend zone which is what usually happens
Yeah, me too... I've been telling people for decades that I have female emotions but I think like a man... When I found out about autism in women, that explained it.
It explained my desire to be alone and inability to start friendships myself too. I was never drawn to boys as much, I always preferred to be with girls while also having few real friends for most of my life. I always had one close friend at a time and maybe a few acquaintances that approached me to try and be friends?
I can't relate to other woman , with their love of chick flicks, shoes, clothes etc. I love collecting dolls tho.
Oh my gosh! Me too.
This explains why my granddaughter and I battle over her taking showers. Thank you so much Oliva for these videos!
I’m so glad I could bring some clarity to that issue! She’s not alone. God Bless you both! 💙
Yes! Also my 2 sons who hate showers.
We have this issue with my granddaughter as well. One would think asking her to take a bath was a death sentence or something. And yet she loves to swim and spends hours in the pool.
@@DebiGoldben My granddaughter will live in the bathtub but showers are a battle!!
I have autism and I have that issue as well! My mom has to practically force me to take showers
Interest in older people as friends, few friends, obsession over my interests, (had that whole horse thing so much so that I can communicate with them!), the shower thing!, I am a very literal person even though I am imaginative, I still feel like there are walls that I have. This video really hits home.
Snap. I am 57 and feel the same.
WOW! Olivia, thank you so much for being so brave and talking about your sexuality. That is huge and something that is hardly ever talked about. I think it's so important for people in our community to hear about more experiences like yours because there are so many of us who are in similar boats but suffer alone in silence. Love and peace to you! You have such a kind heart and your smile is contagious.
Is it possible to be kinda the opposite of asexual and still be Autistic? I feel like I have a bigger sex drive than most people but I really relate to almost everything else about Autism.
❤❤❤❤
THIS video just took away any doubt I had about falling on the spectrum.
Thanks for your beautiful openness and brutal honesty! Just about every thing you've mentioned - the disinterest in sex, crowds/parties, showers, preference for male friendships and 1-on-1 relationships -- that's ME! It's nice to know I HAVE A COMMUNITY out there. I wish I could hug you all. I am 63 and self diagnosed recently. Don't know why it took me so long to come around. I always suspected, but now I am certain. My mother was a brilliant mathematician/engineer. She had all the classic male ASD traits! An entire lifetime of "never fitting in," she always wanted to die. So heartbreaking. I'm semi-retired now and taking classes at the community college - celebrating the fact that I love learning and even at this age can excel!
I experienced burn out my 5th year in the military, I literally fell apart. Ended up in the house ward and now 8 years later it feels like a fever dream
I sometimes find that pausing and thinking a bit before responding in social settings helpful. I might get ignored/forgotten in conversations but it least i dont mask much anymore. Feels sooo much better to just be myself :)
Thank you for sharing. I have been diagnosed with ADHD, generalized anxiety disorder and Social Anxiety disorder. I have been told by a psychiatrist that I couldn’t have Autism because it’s not common in girls, and that I’ve managed well enough to have a relationship and children and because I was able to keep a conversation. 😢 No consideration to my having told her that I have trouble with eye contact, soft touches, not ever liking or wanting to kiss/ have sex, sensory issues, exhaustion after social situations..so on and son on.
Everything you mentioned. I mean everything … down to the showers is me. I don’t know where to go for a proper diagnosis.😢
As an autistic girl, I’ve always noticed I enjoy hanging out with kids than with adults. I’d say I’m pretty child-like but still can be mature when I need to. Even now at 19, I like to play with toys and have a bed full of stuffed animals and the only adults I feel comfortable hanging out with are my mom and stepdad (I have trouble hanging out with my biological dad), my boyfriend, and my best friend. I could play dolls all day, but when it comes to other adults I can only be around for a few minutes before getting anxious and starting a inner meltdown. That’s why I’m trying to get a job at a daycare, because I feel like it’s the only job I’d be good at.
Thanks so much for this Olivia. My 14 year old daughter has just been diagnosed and these types of videos are really helping me to be able to understand her experience in the world. As a result, I can be more sensitive to her needs and a more supportive mom for her in her teen years.
Sooo relatable. I was just diagnosed this year with asd. This is the first time I’m hearing about bridge burning and 😅😅😅 that’s 100% me. I also hated self care as a kid. My parents thought I was showering, but I just sat in the bathroom for awhile and wouldn’t get in 😆 The few friendships, preferring male friends, not understanding social cues. Danggg so validating.
We Soldiers judged a fellow soldier who was suuuuuuuuuuuuuuuper hesitant to shower. He was just content to go without a shower extensively. I hope he found his career, tribe, and rhythm as well as hygiene path.
How did you go about getting your diagnosis? I pretty much know that I am an autistic person with traits also of ADHD and OCD, but people don't believe me 99.999% of the time when I tell them, and I feel like they would if there were professional diagnostic proof.
I got diagnosed on the 1st October this year. Turned 37 days later. I'm not really dealing with it all that well-totally don't know who I am or who I would've been if my mum hadn't tried to beat it out of me for 16 years.
The burnout has me diagnosed with chronic fatigue and fibromyalgia, now 2 years unemployed and put benefits which only make my family hate me more. My diagnosis last month didn't seem to do anything to convince them I wasn't just too sensitive and lazy. Always been too sensitive in their eyes but the lazy got tagged on after burnout nearly killed me (as I fought and fought and fought against it.) Reparenting myself in hope I can get out this slump with zero help from them 💪
Thank you for creating content that has made me feel a LOT less crazy Olivia 💕
This sounds so hard. I hope you will find people that uplift you 💕 all the best for this tough journey 💪❤
So sorry your family treats you with such disdain. Glad you found this channel! Welcome!
I too have fibromyalgia. I think I might have ASD, but I'm not diagnosed officially. I think the stress of trying to fit in, feeling different from everybody else and the energy it takes to mask our true selves plays in hand when it comes to chronic fatigue, fibromyalgia and other such illnesses. I have too autoimmune diseases and I'm 100 % sure I got them due to the amount of stress I have been in my life (ofc there is the genetic disposition that plays a part too).
It's not easy living with these kinds of conditions but I wish you all the best Laura. I hope things will turn better for you in the future.
I identify with your struggle so much. I was diagnosed at 22 ( 35 yrs old at the present) and honestly it hasnt aliviated the struggle. Socializing is a hurdle, work is draining, relationships ...even more. Im a teacher and the amount of masking it takes me to be able to do my job efficiently leaves me so drained and deeply sad at the end of the day. Everything feels intense.
At least in my case- I see ASD as a heavy chain wrapped around my genuine self .
@Azim Premji as a budding herbalist myself i will definately be looking up this particlar doctor thanks to your comment. Many thanks and well wishes to you and your son. Love from Scotland 💙
You have defined me over and over. This is great content. Thank you. I was diagnosed at 58 years old--it explained SO much! I hate a change in my schedule too. Yes, it will lead to an internal meltdown for me as well.
I’m so glad you finally got your answers, Kerry! Thanks for watching my videos 💙
Thank you so much for being you! I'm 65 and was never diagnosed but, man, this is so me! It's wonderful to know that there's not 'something wrong" with me, i actually am probably autistic. And I prefer cats to people, always. Actually, I'm very open to animals and nature, people wear me out. Even my husband and son (who I think have this, too). Anyway, thanks again, keep up the wonderful videos!
I'm 63, hubs almost 66, and the older we get, and more I learn, I am positive that we both have undiagnosed ADHD. I don't feel I can work then clean my house, if I leave to do an errand in the am, I'm junk. Only wish these types of videos were around when I was younger. So happy I am understanding myself now
When I was younger I remember being in a group project with all boys and having so much fun, like good-hearted, good-natured fun where we were all autmoatically accepted and there was no weird emotional stuff like there always was with other teenage girls. Now that I'm an adult I think men can actually be much more complicated when it comes to romantic relationships then any girl I've ever seen be at all ever. I'm obsessed with collecting books and information.
Wow! I had never heard someone talk about the burnout aspect! I’ve experienced that so much through my life. Thanks for that insight!
me too! never heard of anyone talk about it. I'm at the burn out point right now and can barely function. I also am at the point i can't write up anything. I have disability paper work to fill out! It's taking me forever to do it.
Yeah, I feel understood 🥹🥹
watching this while going through the worst burnout of my life, so bad that i’ve fully dropped out of university, was incredibly eye opening. i’m going to show this to my therapist for sure.
Olivia, thank you for your generosity in sharing.
Thank you so much for your videos. They have really opened up a whole new world for me. Things are starting to make much more sense now!
Thanks for sharing this! I definitely hit most of these. I knew from a very young age I was very different from others, especially other girls, and that was really hard for me because I could find no apparent, potential cause - I just labelled myself as "weird." I kept a balance sheet of everything that I liked about myself on one side (my "assets") and everything that I didn't like about myself on the other side (my "liabilities") (naturally, I am an accountant, which fits my ASD). All of these traits (90% on the liabilities side) as part of ASD I classified as separate traits, and thus the liabilities side of my balanced score card was lonnngg. Consequently I had severe self esteem issues, as while I had some assets (some things I liked about myself) there was this long list of "weird" traits about myself that I just couldn't accept. But now, at the age of 33, for the very first time in my life I have actual self-compassion for myself, as I realize all of these seemingly unexplainable traits that I didn't like about myself consolidate into one - being part of the ASD! And now, all of those traits are not even applicable to be on the balance sheet, it's just what it is! I realize I belong to a whole other community of similar humans, which is one of the greatest experiences I have ever felt - to not only know myself now, but know that I am not alone! Truly, realizing I had ASD was mind blowing, earth-shattering, soul soothing. Thank for your sharing your experience with ASD and the information you have gathered.:)
Every. Single. One.
Thank you for the solidarity. While I'm undiagnosed I've always understood/identified with those on any range of the spectrum more than the neuro- typical. Your videos are important, keep up the good work!
I'm so glad you could relate! Thanks so much for watching and for the kind words. I appreciate you support! 💙
@@OliviaHops Great video Olivia.
Helps, more than one knows.Thankful.
I very much appreciate this! Spot on. I feel fatigued with an all around body ache from a day of "masking"/ "fitting in". Females are too dramatic, I definitely cannot tolerate it and don't. It makes me feel less feminine which sometimes bothers me. Covid was a cinch. While everyone was ridden with cabin fever I was calm as can be and laughing at peoples inability to be with themselves. Sorry but not my fault. I think too much, not much of a talker but when i do its to the point. Patience is my name but try to control me and you cease to exist, its that simple. I follow no one, i wear what i want which has to be soft on the skin. I dive into anything that interests me fully. Yes i akso experience the burnout which is frustrating when people look at it in a negative manner. Passionate about my interest until Ive had enough. Change is good isnt it? Oh theres so much more. Its all there inside my brain but it comes out once in while. I write much better than I speak. Then there are days it flows so effortlessly.
I am 67 and was diagnosed in my 50’s as an ADHD-Bipolar woman. It seems being on the spectrum has an amazing amount of similarities. I’ll be researching these now.
Thank you. You’re adorable and very informative.
Your so fun to listen to. I’m learning a lot. Thanks for sharing your experiences.
I was diagnosed when I was 32 years old and I am still learning my own traits. Watching your videos is really soothing. I also am ok with being isolated and with my hyperfocus. I sort of just let it go and that is about it.
the "struggle w/ hygen" part, had me gasping and smiling the whole time, I didn't know it could be related to asd in the slightest , so thank you so much for taking out of your time to make this video
Thank you for your post. It helps me understand my Grandaughter’s daily life issues. I love her dearly but it is so hard to get through to her. She is gifted in so many ways that bring a lot of joy to others.
Her meltdowns have worsened as she has matured. Not everyone can comprehend exactly what her parents are dealing with but I experienced first hand one of her meltdowns. My heart goes out to all parents that are doing the best they can to help their child to deal with daily life.
so far every one of your videos is mind blowing. better than many therapist videos here. thank you.
Wow! Thanks for openly sharing! I didnt realize that all these things that i also share as life experiences/needs/patterns/dispositions was actually autistic expressions. Thought it was just my ‘alien’ brand of being. Ive also not been diagnosed while growing up due to culturally ‘flying under radar’/masking. As an adult, Im finding so much validation and elucidation on the ‘why’ of it all. Dont have access to resources on this except for videos like these. Thank you so much for contributing to not only general awareness, but also answers for undiagnosed autistic adults who’ve had a rough go of it in life misunderstanding & being misunderstood. 💗
I've been diagnosed with a lot of mental illness, including Borderline Personality Disorder but I'm almost certain I'm on the spectrum. I am so happy that I've found your channel. Thank you. 💙
This is SO relatable, thank you so much for sharing your experience. I think I've had burn out for several years now too, I'm exhausted but I keep pushing, I have no choice.
Thank you so much for these videos. I literally had a lightbulb moment!!
You are the most relatable on this subject I've seen so far. I agree with everything you've said and the prior 10 you mentioned except I'm very empathic. Can't afford to get test and don't have doctor for referral so guess I'll go by you.
I was just diagnosed on Tuesday. I've suspected it for a long time. But your videos have helped me to understand myself more. Do you have a video on hardships of friendships and how our brains process those interactions? Thank you for all your videos!
Thanks for posting this, I am new to your channel- I made sure I clicked ‘all’ in notifications, this year! I like hearing your female prospective . My 2 of 4 sons have autism , 1 more severe than the other. Introvert mom of 4, loving the UA-cam community learning from others (dog therapy music for pups/humans) God Bless!
I love your videos. They tick my autistic issues, soothe them, and make me feel security within myself for the first time; because I finally have answers! Because of society just being cruel and not understanding, to us "weirdos", I had been constantly wondering what was "wrong" with me. Why it's so hard to get things out; and for someone else to "hear" what I'm trying to say. Thank you for trying to help me understand myself. ☺️
(⬆️ comment result of 10 edits 🤦)
WOW! I finally have a label for that horrible trait of mine... BURNING BRIDGES! I was familiar with the labels of all my Aspie traits except that one! I was only diagnosed 2 years ago. I had tried to understand why all my life I have ghosted people who want to befriend me & burnt existing friendships. My friends were hurt but I couldn’t explain to them my weird behaviour cause I couldn’t even explain it to myself! What I eventually concluded was that my friends texted me too much when all I wanted to do was sit on the train & read a book on my way to work. Of course, I knew that wasn’t a socially acceptable explanation. You are supposed to be supportive of friends who are having problems. But I have no empathy (another Aspie trait) & so I have to “mask” & pretend I do. Too hard & too exhausting. Now that I’m 59 - I just don’t bother making friends in the first place! And I’m happy.
I literally got diagnosed yesterday with ASD and I have not stopped watching your videos. Thank you I finally feel like I'm being understood.
I laughed so much when you started talking about horses! That’s been my thing since I was six (I’m now 25) - my degree and masters degree are in equine behaviour, and I’m now doing a PhD in veterinary science (on an equine related topic). It was just the only thing I’ve ever been interested in. I just had ASD mentioned by a counsellor today (it has literally never crossed my mind that I could have this) - she said I showed lots of the signs (including being a serious bridge burner, hating socialising and not making eye contact - which I wasn’t aware of until today!). I resonated with your video so much, thank you for taking the time to make this!
You are awesome! You are explaining so many traits I have whole my life and did not understood why I am different or weird. Keep going!!
Additional comment: My mom always told me that I was like a boy. In childhood I had lot of meltdown. I had those in public too. My mom always told others to not say certain kind of words or jokes to me which I would not understand and I would be very upset. I was always weird and I love to be weird. I was different than most girls and also not to sure what to say in some situation. I am also masked my feelings a lot and also cross limits when sharing personal information. You have very clear understanding and now I want to do my screening for Autism. I am 35+ yers old.
I can't believe how many traits I didn't know where because of being on the spectrum! The gut issues, masking omg the burn outs mine can go for two weeks sometimes more ! I'm actually struggling right now to get out of a 3 week log burn out ! This one has been a long one! And seriously what is it about the shower ! Lol honestly it's everything ! I hate it don't like the feel of towels or wet hair ! Shaved my head in my 20s and never went back lol! Don't like getting out of the water I'm fine when I'm in but it takes me atleast an hr of rituals while I'm in there avoiding getting out plus I hate being cold ; if I get too cold I have a melt down . It's like who has the time to do all that ! The struggle is real ! Not one thing you have said in all your videos have I not sat back with my head nudding ! Thank you for all your hard work and sharing your story ! I am finally going to get the help I need to be successful because I want to help other women out there just like us ! That struggle everyday with no support. Get miss diagnosed and lost on the streets , addicted or in jail ! There are so many intelligent women out there that could be changing the world if they had support and a safe place to succeed! Just like you are ! Keep up the great work you are doing !
Thank you for this. Sent me into tears honestly from the beginning talking about masking. I know I won't get a formal diagnosis because of the $$$ here in the US to do it, but I came so close as a kid, it was only "having too many friends" (it was the 90s...) part that made them disqualify me. All of these are me so much but lately I've been having meltdowns because I've been copying people at work with their hair just trying to get mine to look like an average person's and I just feel like I can't replicate what fitting in looks like, so that just, threw me for a loop... Felt very validating. Thank you for this.
I cannot thank you enough for this content. My grand daughter is on the spectrum, only ten years old at the moment but this gives me such great insight into her world.
Thank you so so much for making these videos. 5 months ago my therapist let me know she thought I may be on the spectrum. That was the moment my life changed and for the better! Your videos are so relatable and have helped me so much in this process of self realization and healing, 36 years of not knowing but I'm finding my way now! Thanks Olivia!
I need to look more into this..I have so many traits.
I finally was diagnosed after my whole life when my son was diagnosed so I FINALLY had everything click together slowly watching him grow up and seeing a little me! I absolutely love your channel and it feels so good to know there's a reason behind my "bizarre ways" 😄 love watching these!
@Azim Premji LOL
THANK YOU FOR YOUR KNOWLEDGE & actually sending your knowledge out!!!! I am a 47 y.o woman who is literally crying. After (thankfully) somehow finding your vids(female autistic adult traits) I cannot even believe out of the 3 vids watched so for EVERYTHING but 2 or 3 traits you've mentioned - wouldnt be labeled as severe(in MY mind, of course :) As for every other single trait.... ITS ME!!! The thought of POSSIBLY NOT being all the HORRIBLE things I've been told I was, my entire adult life, is what has me sobbing. TY, TY, TY for giving me possible HOPE from YOUR vids that todayI WILL actually be looking forward to scheduling a Dr's appt. after quite literally giving up for decades. I feel ridiculously stupid for not even thinking, an adult could possibly be diagnosed anywhere on,, in, or around the Autism spectrum.
THANK YOU AGAIN OLIVIA . You are very much appreciated. ❤ I
Thank you Olivia. Your videos are so helpful! I have a daughter recently diagnosed and a son with similar traits (not diagnosed). I also work as a counsellor and due to my personal experience and research/info gathering on autism I am more able to recognise adults who I work with who present symptoms. I have referred a few of them to your channel. Thank you so much for what you do.
I am so impressed with your positivity even as you are being so transparent. Have you considered speaking to children and parents? Your message is powerful and your presentations are thoroughly honest. Please share your gift.
I never had an interest or so I thought. I had fictional books. I loved and still love reading. Mostly romance. It had to be romance. The biggest one was twilight. But I also have ADHD which means I get multiple hobbies that I throw myself into and then drop later which kind of makes me not want to get started in anything.
Oh wow, 10/10. I’m currently going through a formal diagnosis for autism. My perpetual state of burnout and sensory overload set me on the path. The more I learn about autism, the more obvious to me it all is.
You are adorable! Thank you for your radiant transparency! You made me laugh out loud in recognition and tears are still welling in my eyes. Seriously, Olivia! So glad I found you! Thank you , thank you, thank you!
Number 8 really hit home with me. Obviously i dont care that I'm not interested in 'physicality' but the part that does make me feel absolutely awful is how I worry that I will never find someone who feels the same or at least doesnt mind that I don't want/need that aspect of a romantic relationship in my life. It's ruined relationships for me in the past, even though I'd tell people beforehand that I dont like that kind of thing :(
I can't thank you enough for making this your helping me understand me
Your pronunciation and diction are incredible. Listening to your precise speech in this video is a joy. That probably sounds very weird but trust me when I say it is a high compliment. In your last video when you talked about black and white thinking and how you had a lot of trouble almost impossible to see thinking in Gray values that really hit home for me. I'm very thankful again for you releasing these videos and being brave to talk about a subject that I feel is way under covered in the modern world. I feel like it's only in the last five years that people has thought of mental issues as not being an illness or a disability and have been phrasing it as being wired or built different. You've made a subscriber out of me. I will be going through your whole library of videos. Thank you again you've made a big difference in my life.
What you said about showering! Hate the process of getting clean. I also hate the feeling of having body hair (unless it's 2, maximum 3 days old. Sensory issues. Love being a lil bit scratchy but I'm hairy and hate feeling fluffy.) So I shower too. I hate being wet and I hate my hair being wet unless it's the dead of summer, in which case I often will run my hair under the hose.
I’m glad I’m not the only one!! I hate my hair wet, too. I have to put it in a bun (which of course makes it dry slower) but I can’t have it on my neck. I can’t have hair on my neck when it’s dry though either lol
@@OliviaHops I've let my hair grow since the whole pandemic thing started. First time ever. I keep it pulled back all the time as I don't like it down. I even have to pull it all on the very top of my head to sleep at night. I look like Pebbles on the Flintstones (yep, I'm THAT old!)
It literally will drive me crazy with my hair touching my face, then other times I like to let my hair down!!? 🤷
Every time I see one of your videos I feel like I've finally found my tribe! You could easily have been describing me in every one of these traits. I have been the outcast in my family my entire life because I was always so book smart that it never dawned on anyone that I might be autistic. I remember our cousins coming over to visit and all the kids would split off into groups and I was the only one alone hanging out with the adults. I couldn't understand why the other kids wanted to do the frivolous things they did, it seemed boring and pointless to me. And yes, I always had male friends and have always been more comfortable around males, not because I wanted boyfriends but because they were easier to relate to and tolerate. I was so practical I couldn't understand why girls wanted to play with dolls when there were real babies in the world. Of course, I'm the oldest of 9 so there was always a baby for me to take care of in the house while I was growing up and it was kind of a burden so dolls were out for me. I could go on and on but I'll stop now.
I'm 74 years old and was diagnosed with autism and ADHD 2 months ago. I can relate so well with most of your points.
Thank you for educating/promoting awareness! You are terrific at this!
Thank you so much! That means so much to me!
I love you. Thank you for sharing. I have always wondered what was wrong with me....... You have shown me its not just me. I have never had a better understanding of alllllllllllllll of my issues until now.
Wow! I’m so honored my videos could help you figure yourself out, Jess! That makes me so happy. You’re awesome and there is nothing wrong with you! You’re brain just works differently than others ☺️💙
Thank you so much for this video! I had suspected since my daughter was little that she was on the spectrum. I took her to a university center that specialized in autism and ADHD when she was in kindergarten. She was diagnosed with ADHD and the doctor assured me she wasn’t autistic because she had an imagination and could think abstractly (as much as a 6 year old can). Since then, she has been treated for depression and anxiety. Last month, she divulged that she had been harming herself. We have now found a center for daily therapy to help her with the severe social anxiety that she has been experiencing. They also added the ASD diagnosis to the other three we were aware of. I felt complete relief in knowing there was a reason for all she was and is going through. She, on the other hand, is not happy with the diagnosis because “what are people going to think?” Even at 13, she has stereotyped thinking about what having autism is.
Your descriptions are like you are describing her! She was obsessed with horses until just a year or so ago. Now, she is into football. She doesn’t care about hygiene at all! She is confused about her sexuality. She really struggles with making friends and more importantly, keeping them. She has always been a parrot, repeating quotes (in the correct context). So much more! Your video seems to be describing my daughter almost exactly! It has always been difficult for me to wrap my neurotypical brain around how she can be so crazy smart intellectually, but not emotionally or socially. I hope that I can help her understand that the fact that she has ASD can be an awesome thing and that her uniqueness is beautiful.
I was diagnosed with ADHD a year ago, which I definitely have (I fit the "intelligent woman with inattentive ADHD" archetype to a T), but the psychologist who evaluated me said that although I have more autistic traits than most people, I couldn't be autistic because I made jokes, showed self-awareness, and made "great eye contact" (I had to train myself to do that). I knew that what she said about autism was outdated and overly simplistic, but I didn't feel like opening that can of worms. I'm starting to really suspect I have some mild flavor of autism, so I'm looking into getting evaluated at a place that specializes in adult autism. From what I've been seeing in these videos, autism in girls and women tends to look more subtle and thus often doesn't get diagnosed unless a practitioner really knows their stuff.
That first doctor sounds like an idiot. Many people with autism can think MORE abstractly and have intense imaginations. Which is why they can excell st maths and the creative arts. You are the sane one and a good Mom for trying to find out the best for your child 🙂
Currently awaiting an assessment for myself after struggling all of my life with most of these traits and with mental health issues too. This really spoke to me. Thank you.
Thank you Olivia for sharing another video. It is truly an eye-opener to me as I have a grandson who has autism but has we're still waiting for the results to concur the diagnosis. Thank you though your videos are so informative and you are such a pleasant upbeat young lady. Thank you again God bless. Marilyn
Thank you for this information, Olivia. My son's gf of 10 yrs has autism, BPD, and PTSD. Other family members do not understand what she goes through and think that she just doesnt try hard enough and is lazy. UGH! That makes me so mad....i know she tries hard and does her best. Having said that, what can i do to make her feel more comfortable when she visits?
Show her this video and your comment, then just pat her on the back and walk away.
Knowing she has an ally is everything, I bet
Thanks for watching the premier and for this question ☺️ so, this is what I would love my future mother in law to do when I visited to make me more comfortable: acknowledge that she understands I need alone time and naps and reassure me that that’s okay and to not feel bad about needing said things. Also, having my favorite foods on hand. She always buys me cereal because that’s a giant part of my (terrible) diet.
@@OliviaHops Thank you! i never thought to have her favorite foods on hand. She has a terrible diet too but my son is helping her eat more healthfully. That reminds me, give my best to Alex. My son is Alex, also. It is not easy, to say the least, to do what he does for her but he does it because he LOVES her, like your Alex loves you! Rest up now, Olivia...you done good.
Please google ‘Lyme disease and autism’ or ‘Lyme disease and bipolar disorder’ . You might be surprised at what you find. Many Lyme people spend years misdiagnosed with these other conditions.
GREAT VIDEO!!!
I relate to all but hygiene. I have massive chronic pain--which I think is a result of masking and (self) emotional blindness--so I crave hot showers. It is one of the few things other than sleep that can bring any relief.
However, I have hygiene quirks: I can't stand make-up (the feel on my skin & smells), perfume, or shaving. Not only are these things problematic in the sensory realm, but I can't waste my time, energy, money on appearance. It's so illogical! The hair on my head bothers me, though: I hate when it touches my face; it makes me itch; and my follicles hurt when I put my hair up. When the pandemic began, I started cutting my hair super short w/ clippers, and I am SO much happier! I live in Michigan where it's often cold, so I have to wear hats a lot, but I love my short hair! I'm so glad to have broken free from the masking of "feminine" hairstyles.
It's amazing how much "bandwidth" in our brains is taken up by sensory irritation, and how much a little change can drastically improve the quality of our lives!
On the rest of your points: so much YES!!! I feel seen.
Thank you so much for sharing! Be well!
You sound like you have Lyme disease. It’s common for people with Lyme to have hypersensitive senses. That is they can’t stand too much noise, or smells are overwhelming, or clothes hurt your skin.
Just something to check out.
I bet you’re a sight for sore eyes!
Omg! I'm am so thankful for you and your videos! I'm crying right now because I am realizing that I have been struggling with Autism my whole life and being misdiagnosed with anxiety, depression, severe PTSD. I have watched your first video on 10 things that affect you daily, and now this video.....I have every single issue you have described! I have struggled alot with all the issues you talk about and have been misjudged and mistreated way too much. Despite the fact, I have manged to do ok as an adult until I lost my mom to suicide. I was in the next room and heard the gunshot, and she died in my arms...seems like yesterday but it was 5 years ago. It has totally changed me and has been almost crippling to my daily life. I am 33 and a mother, and everyone has ridiculed me and told me I'm over reacting about what happened bc it's been long enough to grieve. To anyone this would be devastating, but to some one with autism, especially someone unaware of their condition, it has been severely traumatic and life altering.. Seeing your videos today were a blessing and I am making an appointment today to be evaluated for Austim so I can hopefully get some much needed help and guidance . I now see why counseling has barely made things easier. 😭🥲🤗 Thank you so much for posting. I think you, sharing your experiences is going to change my life and my son's life for forever! And I'm sure plenty of others'! Thank you, thank you!🙏🙏
I'm in my 30's and just discovered that I am on the spectrum, thank you for this video! Every single trait is on the mark and explains so much about my struggles growing up, especially preferring male friends. I don't know about other females out there, but my lack of understanding/interest in romantic/sexual connections plus my preference for male friends and one on one time led to SO MANY misunderstandings in my teen years!
Every time I watch one of your videos, I agree with everything. I'm undiagnosed, but the more YT videos I watch about ASD and examine how "abnormal" I behave, the more I really think I should be officially diagnosed but finding a ASD therapist seems so daunting. "Hangs out one on one, with males (or non-drama-inducing nonbinaries I suppose) or adults." I'm AFAB Agender, I've always felt like an alien, but especially so around typical cisgirls/women and maybe this is really why. I also burn bridges when things don't feel right and I'm on the Ace spectrum.
Thank you..my daughter has allot of these traits
I’m poor at masking for a girl because I’m moderately (in the middle of low and high) functioning but yet I still have those burnouts you described damn Olivia, those are relatable🙁
I feel like I'm having more burnouts as I get older and they seem harder to get through!
@@MomontheSpectrum I feel you
@Azim Premji NO autism CANT BE CURED your son STILL has autism, IT just IMPROVES his behavior, THAT’S IT
Thanks there were some that surprised me that I identified with! Always happy to meet another Aspie warrior , I know some people think I am crazy but I beg to differ, we are here to help the world evolve!! So be happy and confident and stand in love!💖🌈
Olivia I am loving listening to you! Just listening to your traits is like light bulb moments. I am 57 and just coming to being diagnosed.
I am hooked on your hair ! I want to see what the braids look like!
Aw, thanks so much! It's one of my favorite hairstyles! It actually isn't braids, it's made of twists, so it's easier than braids. Maybe I'll have to make a video of it someday lol!
Please do, it is elegant and casual simultaneously.
This is weird for me to watch, bc you described me SO well. My son was diagnosed at a very young age with high-functioning autism, but I've never been diagnosed myself. I DO have ADHD (so do both of my kids). I've been wondering for a long time if I was autistic, as well. I think, for whatever reason, I'm scared to know. The problem I have is that it's SO similar to ADHD, so I often feel like I'm over-thinking it & it's just my ADHD.
Currently On a meltdown ledge and I melted 2% less during this video. Your video helped me ALOT. 2% is huge and your videos are a breath of fresh air.
BLESS YOUR HEART for making these vids ~ I’m 57! …. And I’m just realizing I may be ON THE SPECTRUM.
Yes! Oh I so relate to this video! I'll highlight a few that stuck out to me. My son has autism support level 3 and is nonverbal. I was just diagnosed this past summer at age 30, 2 years after him. We present very differently from one another. It took me going onto UA-cam and seeing video like yours that helped me see my place on the spectrum, too!
Masking and Burnout-I remember at a young age people saying things like, "Do you ever think before you speak?" or "It's not polite to point." I would internalize social statements from others as if they were law and force myself to "behave" in public. I'd come home every day from school completely exhausted and irritable and my mom was so confused why I just wanted to lock myself in my room each day.
Friendships-I also have just a few close friends that I care deeply about. Growing up I had did have several older friends, especially in high school since I didn't like to party or hang out in large groups. I was in a yoga class with women that were in their 30s - 60s and they were extremely supportive when I was doubting myself growing up undiagnosed.
Hygiene- I remember my babysitter complaining when I was growing up how cold I like my showers. I'm realizing now that I'm sensitive to temperature changes and don't like being hot. I only realized I have an issue with showers since you mentioned it, so thank you!
It's weird seeing my life through a different lens now, but I'm so glad to know there are so many others like me. I truly appreciate you sharing your experiences as I can really relate!! ❤️
You are blowing my mind! I have been binge watching a lot of your videos and wondering "am I on the spectrum???"
I absolutely don't have some of the most challenging issues that you have. For one thing, I have a lot of empathy and am way too tuned into social cues and that is actually what I think my main "problem" is. So to that end I have a lot of empathy for what you are going through. and I am afraid I may put my "foot in my mouth" and says something that could hurt you 🥴 I also don't have melt downs, or gut issues. Some of the things I do have are milder.
I believe I am a highly sensitive person and attribute many of my "quirks" to that... I am very easily jarred by smells and loud noises and surprises. I don't like my routine messed with. I am sensitive to some aspects of touch but not like you. I have very few friends and am exhausted by large groups and social situations. If I get together with a few people I feel like I need at least a day to recover. I love spending time alone. Special interests? OMG yes! I don't see that as all bad, but it can cost me a lot of money.
I am not sure if my characteristics aren't more related to being highly sensitive. I am too intuned to other people's body language and vibes. If I am with a lot of people I am exhausted mostly because I am not just listening to what they say but to all the nuances of body language. And I am keeping up with all of it that I can see at one time. I always want to make people feel better if they are upset. And maybe that sounds good, but it gets in the way of forming close relationships.
Even though being overly sensitive causes me interpersonal issues and anxiety, in a way I see it as my "super power." I can watch two people talk and not only understand what they are saying but have a pretty good idea how they are feeling. Those two things do not always match! But as soon as I think the other person is putting off vibes about me I shut down. If I could ignore the vibes and plunge on I would do better.
So I don't know what my deal is, but I'll look more into the autism spectrum. Maybe it really doesn't matter a lot? I am in my 50s and am managing well for myself even though there are some things that I do feel hold me back and cause me anxiety. But now I really do want to know if this is what is going on with me.
sorry for my LONG message ... this is one of my "things"
Hi! So introverted people get exhausted by social situations, specially if it is a large group of people and need some alone time to recharge their "social battery". Maybe that could also be an explanation to that? Hope it helps
I actually got diagnosed with autism and ADHD last month, and I also have the trait with "too much empathy" and it feels like I am extremely sensitive towards social cues. I get the vibe pretty quickly, but have a harder time processing what I should do with myself in the situation lol. I have some imposter syndrome towards being diagnosed with autism, and being so into social cues. If I am autistic, my special interest must be feelings, because I spend so much time analysing my or other people's feelings
@@Caliemha Hi Camielmha. I can very much relate. It sounds like we are similar. I haven't been diagnosed with anything, but I haven't sought a medical opinion.
Do you feel like you are tracking all the social cues even if they aren't related to you? I do that. I feel like I overstated it slightly in my original message but I definitely pick up things between people that they don't seem to see and then I am kind of obsessed with tracking their cues and confirming in my mind if I am understanding it correctly.
As far as special interests go ... firstly people don't generally have all the symptoms so that may be one you just don't have. I never recognized that in myself until just the past few years. I just chalked it up to thinking I was like my father who always had hobbies. But lately, I am realizing it is a bit more than normal. but it is definitely not an entirely bad thing. Really, I think most or all the traits are not entirely bad. Maybe we have the power to shape them to be positive traits.
@@olivia8979 Sometimes, I try all the time to assess how people are feeling, even in other groups. I try to understand the dynamic. Sometimes I focus on a very specific thing, e.g. a specific reaction, and I think for a long time about it.
I can see it is a month since I replied to you (sorry for this late reply), and it has been an interesting month regarding my self image as a diagnosed autistic. I'm closer to having no doubts that I'm autistic.
An example is, that I believed I was good at knowing what I'm feeling. But I'm actually quite bad at it, I just think about it all the time, and try to process situations and how I feel about it. But I can't really tell how I feel in the situation, and it takes even longer for me to know why I feel the way I do.
I believed I had great self awareness, but it was mostly anxiety that gave me an extra pair of eyes that looked down on me, nitpicking and criticizing.
So a lot of rumination, but also a bit of progress. How are you faring?
@@Caliemha I think the self-awareness and mindfulness are skills we all need to work on. I think with attention and practice you will definitely see improvement! And you care enough about how you feel and how other people feel to be anxious about it. A lot of people don't. In some ways I envy them because I think they can be braver - take more social risks. But I would personally not want to become like them.
I don't know that I am autistic or perhaps highly sensitive or what. But I am feeling like none of these things are "wrong" or "inferior," or "bad." Also not superior. Everyone comes with different skills and abilities. We have to have all these types of people in the world.
I am definitely in favor of working on the parts of ourselves we want to improve. But don't beat yourself up! You are who you are supposed to be, and you care enough to hone your skills and become the best version of you.
I can't say how much this means to me; you sharing this information and your personal expressions of ASD. I also struggle with ADHD (and gluten intolerance) and am reluctant to face yet another disorder. But learning what you have to share brings me so much relief! I feel understood and validated on nearly every point!
ESPECIALLY THE OVER-SHARING! These things are just FACTS, there should not be shame about facts!
Thank you so much for making these videos!! I’m 37 and have been seesawing about getting evaluated and am pretty sure I need to for better understanding of myself
I have adored your videos!
Aw thanks so much for watching, Dee! So glad you enjoy them! 💙
Oliva, I am so proud of you for speaking the reality of autism as a normal conversation without shame as you clearly said. I learned a lot from you today and I really appreciate all of that value information provided. As you named and explained 10 of the most common things that you go through on daily basis, I started thinking of myself and I think that I had been autistic all my life and never knew it or ever been diagnosed. I also have two grandsons that I an sure that they are autistic and his father, my son, told us, me and my youngest son that he believed into that his sons are autistic, but unfortunately their mother would not accept it. The olders has learned how to deal with it as nothing happens, but the youngest is still struggling to deal with life. God Bless you always and thank you for such valuable information. I will follow you now so I can learn more about your type of autism because you should know that there’s lots of levels from mild to severe and in between. Thank you so much.
The SHOWER one and friends points were spot on for me. I'm 22 and I have very much hated very badly showers and always have to find a reason to force myself to do it. It's an OVERWHELMING process like I would be in the shower for 2 hours all of high school. Now I KNOW how showers make me feel so I try to prepare and plan them so it's as less stressful as possible. Tips I do:
1. Planning my showers around my schedule and mental well being (downloaded a habits app to aim for 3 showers a week so I can take shortish showers. I mostly shower 2 times a week but I hope to reinforce the habit over time.
2. Using Music to help keep me keep track of time and motivated/focused.
3. Get efficient cleaning products that I love to make things easier for me. (This can includes after shower things too like lotion or purfume maybe)
4. While I'm showering I try to think of how I'll feel after a nice shower and something I'm looking forward to. (ex. Clean sheets, nice meal/dessert or snack, hanging with a friend and be able to feel confident and clean)
5. If I just dont want to shower, use wipes to clean my body and not to think too much of it. To be patient with myself and use my time on something else that will make me feel better.
Wow! Nail heads hit! Wonderful! Thank you for sharing!
I so identify with this. I saw much of myself in your first video too. I'm not diagnosed at 68, no one takes me seriously about it.
And showers! For me it's sensory. Physically painful. And being wet... Yuk!
Oh my, so many of those traits apply to me. I used to daydream a lot in school. Teachers thought I might be mentally retarded. They had me IQ tested and I was on 8th grade level while only a 4th grader. Yes, I was very bored.
I hated school and would get bored. Usually did poorly on tests,especially in high school. I always felt stupid like everyone was smarter then me. I did an IQ test it was 135. I'm was like ????? how?