Nice mic drop-although there is enough of the books in here to show they looked up a wikipedia page and saw he was a antagonist in his first book and thought "nobody likes antagonists-nobody will like that as a main character or find it interesting" even though on that same Wikipedia page it will probably tell them that 25 million copies sold would disagree with that notion. So its not about them not knowing the books-its executives thinking they know better than original writer and knowing better than 25 million fans who love the series. Its dipshit pretentious uneducated and unintelligent executives that think they are smarter than everyone else while being the dumbest people in the room. Seriously if the writers had just learned from the percy jackson fiasco they would have made a better film. Yet again if most companies would just fucking learn from others mistakes even 50 percent of the time these dumb film corporations (hell this goes for any entertainment company from any medium-movies-games-shows-etc) they would be lifting the fucking infinity gauntlet by now. And that metaphor of the infinity gauntlet i got from yahtzee croshaw.
They definitely "made it kid friendly" Artemis fowl in the books was totally ok with cutting someone's finger off to unlock a door and then re-attaching it
grim tnt kid friendly or adult viewing,a good story plot and content is still key but Disney failed in all characteristics:.that kid friendly content like Aladdin and mature content like pirates of Caribbean magic is long gone and replaced with mediocre and bad writing
From what i heard,Artemis Fowl is like a mix between American Psycho,Die Hard,Peter Pan and Ocean´s eleven,right? I can imagine an HBO show or an animated movie. A Disney Live action doesn´t sound right. Disney,if you can´t make movies for teenagers,don´t make them and leave them to HBO,Netflix,Warner Bros or Paramount. You´ll waste money you won´t get back. just stick to remakes for dumb kids and China.
My 10 year old daughter, close to to the end said, "Why does it feel like the movie is getting close to the end?" [Feeling the same way I said] "Because it is getting close to the end!" "I did not liked that at all..." My 8 year old daughter kept watching Gumball on her phone...
In the books, it is revealed he's constantly wearing mirrored contract lenses that allow him to see, but reflect their magic. He's legitimately smart in the books and does smart things.
@Coconut Pal To put it to you like this. The only thing Disney got from the books are the character names. That is it. The mirrored lenses was to reflect hypnotic magic from the fairies.
@Coconut Pal A bit rusty since it has been years since I've read the books, so this might be a bit off. From what I remember the magic works by needing a direct unobstructed pathway to your eyes. Reflective sunglasses can prevent the magic from working. Artemis wears contract lens that are hard to detect with the same properties as the sunglasses.
The best thing was Eoin Colfer was never required to explicitly state that Artemis was a genius, The Fowl way of talking and manipulating , it just shone right through. For example in the very first book, Artemis has to meet his contact on fairy information, He calmly threatens a man probably about 20 years older than him. That just showed to the reader that Artemis Fowl is a genius and that fact is cemented in its place over and over again as we keep reading through. But here they can't even do anything without saying that "Oh by the way , this guy's a genius" while doing none of the things that are supposed to make him a genius. A goddamn failure but then again , what did we expect? lol
@@straypaper Simular to the movie I believe he wears the sunglasses at first. Then takes them off in a moment of trust, but at the end of the first book reveals the contact lens were also in play. Or he revealed them mid-book. I can't remember.
I'm worried about Jeremy. You can't just turn to apple juice every time there's a tragedy. Artemis Fowl is just the next seismic act following Covid and race riots.
I never read the books but given the pitch for them was literally "Die Hard with Fairies and the main character is the Hans Gruber of the story" I am still mad on behalf of book readers they made this watered down piece of crap.
True artemis fowl starts out as a villianous criminal mastermind but becomes more sympathetic to others as the novels progress. The same audience that like artemis fowl will like ender's game both of which feature a young protagonist dealing with adult responsibility. Honestly ender's game film did the protagonist justice as it shows how the young man strategically deals with bullies and war games. However, ender's game film did poorly due to fast pacing, too straight forward and difficult to find the audience to appeal to.
The end of the movie was basically that sailor moon meme lol. "I'm Artemis Fowl, criminal Mastermind." "But you (mostly) didn't do anything criminal throughout the whole movie, despite that being your character trait." *Credits roll*
@@PrimeofPerfection what? Naaaaah, she totally kidnapped herself! Really though, I haven't read the books myself, but from other videos I've seen on the books review, he was supposed to be a criminal Mastermind yet, despite that kidnapping, he did virtually nothing to show him being an actual criminal or smart, and everything was kinda done for him or told to him, so big rip
@@kaushikprasad2653 it's basically tuxedo mask going "I'm off!", With sailor moon going "but you didn't do anything", and he just leaves without responding
What’s cool about the first book is that Artemis is legitimately the villain, but he’s a fascinating villain. He’s naïve even though he’s brilliant, and his idealism very nearly gets him killed by a bunch of fairies. He has to mature over the course of several books and they get really interesting.
@@owenwilkinson2649 He get a redemption arc so, of a sort? His arc develops over like 8 books. So he's a straight up villain in the first book, and gets better over time and he and Holly develop a believable relationship over time that goes from antagonistic to reluctantly working together, to working together and finally friendship.
the one thing i remember from reading this book when i was younger is how artemis is a straight up ruthless criminal and somehow disney managed to water his character down completely and make him a hero of sorts???
Yeah he was straight up the bad guy until later books when someone else was the bigger threat and he started going soft. Shame we'll never get to see that on the big screen.
He made Holly think she was drugged xause he kept her in an isolated room where she xouldnt leave jus for some information about a book and Dey watered that down.
that bit in the end where Artemis and Holly were like “fOrEvEr FrIeNdS” that literally made me throw up because Holly and Artimis hate each other in the books. He literally captured her then like 5 minutes later everyones hugging and fighting and hugging
Never read the books but that was one of the big disconnects for me in the character development. Big issue... I still have no idea how long the main story takes place. He kidnaps her, never actually treats her well, and then within an hour (like I said, no idea how long it was supposed to take) they're suddenly best friends apparently willing to die for each other? Made NO sense. Similar with his big assistant, we assume they were close before the movie starts but they just seem to be friendly.
@@michaelkaufhold3126 Artemis' relationship with Butler was SO so good in the books! Like, Butler would obey him, sure, but he was never afraid to call his bullshit on and sass him when he tought Artemis was being unreasonable. There was trust, but the body-guard code didn't allow Butler to enter a more friendly/familial relationship with his charge UP UNTIL HE WAS DYING and told Artemis his name (Domovoi) because nothing else mattered. And in this movie? It's just... bad...
@@MissShizko i knew it was gonna be bad, but when they say in the opening "never call him butler even though that's his last name" I knew it was gonna be a train wreck
To be fair, after artimis fowl helped holly out of a jam and realized the error of his ways, she did become friends with Artimis later on in the series. And in the first book she did hate him, but still respected him.
I love how he knew that they wanted Artemis to appear more relatable and friendly. In the books he begins as the villian!!! He is the mastermind doing hurtful things. It takes books to unpack his motivations(which were to save his parents with the wealth he gained) and have him grow and have friends. Making Artemis stuck in this scheme of opal and his dad removes his genius of learning the elves existing and being the first human to ever outsmart the elves and work around their technology in ways they didn't even know possible. In this movie he is reactive, the books he is the sole actor and mastermind. It was doomed to fail when he became the pawn in the first movie.
Also, in the novels Artemis never really turns into a goody-two-shoes type preaching peace and love for all, even after saving the day for selfless reasons on multiple occasions. He absolutely hates seeing himself as a good guy and always likes to keep up the pretence of being a cold-hearted bastard, helping out the fairies not because he likes them but because it somehow serves his interests, even if deep down he knows perfectly well that isn't true.
So right. Plus in some points he was on the brink of madness. When he was looking for the elves he was using very sketchy evidence and extreme spending to just get a book that "might" give him answers. Also it didnt feel like a kids story. If felt more adult. Sure they never get into the bad side of artemis buisness but what made him evil was the things he expirence and the people he had to deal with to get there.
Slight book spoilers below: When I saw Disney was gonna be doing this I already knew they were gonna muck it up. For the first book (or two, depending on how you look at it), Artemis isn't really the good guy. He's really the main antagonist of the story at first and only later on does he sort of transition into a more heroic and helpful figure. That's the biggest difference right out of the box. Oh and his dad not being involved with fairies in any way, shape or form. Or really involved much at all, actually. The first book did take place almost entirely at his house, but it was a tense thriller because he was, well, the bad guy. We didn't really know his motives. We didn't really know his plan. Butler, while loyal, is a tad bit uneasy with how dark he thinks Artemis is going to go. It isn't really until Opal becomes a full-fledged villain in her own right and gets somewhat obsessed with screwing over Artemis (and the world) that he moves into a more heroic pattern of stopping her (though usually with an angle to benefit himself, too). What a waste. This could have been a fantastic movie series.
@Benjamin Boerner You're absolutely right. This movie would be great and getting a lot of benefits if this was made during the time where Disney was making Narnia and first 3 Pirates of the Caribbean movies, but sadly this movie was made during the time where Star Wars and MCU were Disney's money making machines. Neither Star Wars or MCU stuff are mostly destinied to be fail which is really sad because I don't want kids in current day or in the future to know and remembered Disney because of Star Wars and MCU movies.
Haven't read the books, you make it sound like Artemis is the protagonist and antagonist at the same time, which is interesting if true. Btw, an antagonist is a character who opposes the protagonist, they can be morally good or evil; a villain, is a character who is always morally evil.
@@sadmansakib4063 I mean.... that's all well and good, but is he in FULL CONTROL? Or just the script? Because you can have a great script with a shit movie.
I’ll never understand Disney. Hey, we don’t know if this book will land and appeal to a bunch of people so we’ll make our own thing that we know doesn’t appeal to people. Come on guys, at least take the risk so you have a chance of winning.
@@Anthonycheesman33 except that Disney's been doing that long before the MCU existed and long before they owned Marvel, so the MCU has nothing to do with them making cash grabs
@@Anthonycheesman33 they still take chances they just also still make cash grabs. Heck, if this movie even just used the MCU formula at least it would have been a competently put together film, a predictable one sure but one that at least executed the story in a way that was done well with things like proper acting and editing and at least a little care for the characters.
The MCU takes more risks then anything else Disney has put out lately. Guardians of the Galaxy was basically a forgotten brand before the movies rebooted them.
The books are honestly great. Book Artemis doesn’t learn all this shit from his dad. Book Artemis’ dad has been freezing in Russian for the past two years. It was Artemis who discovers the fae, translates their language on his own with no reference whatsoever, sets a trap to capture Holly, holds her hostage for days (if not weeks, it’s been a while since I read the book) against the best and the brightest of the fae (which are very strong and have both magic and tech he’s never even dreamed about), then outsmarts them once again to get out of an impossible trap of a timestop and a bio-bomb to keep the ransom they paid for her. Yeah, Artemis Fowl is a very smart character. That was NOT Artemis Fowl. This book was written perfectly to be adapted into an awesome, complex movie (also containing important themes like sexism, environmentalism and the such in a way that isn’t preachy or boring), but Disney had to go and turn it into another cardboard cutout of a children’s movie.
Romi Maman you’re right about the themes, when the first trailer dropped and it had Judi dench I knew something was off, coz that undercuts one of hollys big character traits. I don’t get who wrote this movie.. or why?i haven’t seen it and don’t plan on watching it either, just from the summary of the plot alone, it’s so far from the books, it’s not worth it.
At least Percy Jackson was midly entertaining and to be honest I really enjoyed Eragon and the last scene really got me excited for the next one... which never came
@@Lloyd00 They changed so much from Eragon that a sequel was not possible until the movie itself decided to go on a tangent. The book was kinda barely-average, but at least it had a lot of interesting ideas. It's too bad that the movie did away with most of those. Artemis Fowl was just massacred though. The movie says nothing about the books, because it's not even an adaptation.
Reminds me of Tyrion Lannister of GoT show. Smart and witty character but when the showrunners ran out of Martin's source material, they started writing themselves. Needless to say it all went to shit after that.
Book: A really well passed story about evil child genius trying to screw with bunch of techno-wizards with revolving POV characters, all with hidden agendas and special powers. Movie: Aparently nothing about that...
That's because books don't matter when it comes to the movie. If the movie is only good if you've read the books then the movie sucks, if the movie is great but doesn't follow the book at all, it's still a good movie. Regardless on the source the movie needs to stand on its own. The book does not matter in this regard.
"Maybe fans love the books because of its layered characters, intriguing mind games, and witty dialogues?" "Nah, they just like fairies." Some Disney Exec, probably.
Hound Lock : Exactly. Either we boycott them or we keep giving ‘em publicity. And one of those ways might change something. Hint: it’s not the latter option.
Please draw a number tag from the despenser and have a seat. One of our committed ambassadors well be right with you. And please be certain to read and follow the social distancing information posted for your benifit. Thank you and come agian. ...next.
"Little more apple juice... Oh, now that's way too much... Alright, I'm gonna head off to enjoy my apple juice." I almost lost it right then. That was some funny shit.
So many wrong things. Potential book spoilers. •Artemis is a "good guy" surprised at his father's criminal acts. •Artemis' father stole things to keep the lower elements (fairy world) a secret. •Opal Koboi appears before the Arctic Incident. The second book. •Root is a woman negating Holly's entire character arc of being the 1st female recon officer. •Holly and Mulch are allies of Artemis even though Artemis was supposed to kidnap Holly for a ransom of a literal ton of gold and Mulch was brought in to rescue her. •No ritual performed by Holly or underlying message about why the Lower Elements exists and the fairies connections to nature that humanity is destroying forcing the fairies underground. •Apparently Briar Cudgeon is already a bad guy when he wasn't until the Arctic Incident. •Some kind of fairy ships are on the surface world even though their secrecy is one of their core rules. •Artemis' mother is dead so we don't see her lose her mind and show Artemis' good side by worrying about her and giving back HALF the ransom gold to cure her. •No grand siege of Fowl Manor where we see Artemis routinely outsmart the LEP at every turn. I'm sure there's more but these are the ones I know of.
- Butler doesn't dismantle an entire LEPRecon assault team by himself. - Butler doesn't beat the troll unconscious by himself, with a mace, while wearing medieval armor.
The trio of bad adaptations The last Airbender, Percy Jackson, and now Artemis Fowl Edit: I looked at the comments and I totally forgot about so many which really isn’t a good sign
What the book is: "Die Hard with fairies" What we wanted: A 12 year-old Irish Hans Gruber that actually gets his gold What we got: A bizarre mix of the most boring parts of Home Alone and Darby O'Gill
If Jeremy has become Bruce Wayne from the Dark Knight Rises, does that mean it is only a matter of time till a woman dressed as a cat breaks into his house? Gasp, Jeremy watch out! Judi Dench is coming for your mothers pearls!!!
I mean, the Russian Mafia is not at all in the first book, so there's no need at all to say Russian Mafia. And even if you do want to include the dad-story (or make the second book into a movie) you could make it just random criminals.
Silverfox I’m aware,but you would think Hollywood or at least the directors would learn what not to do with the characters and world there representing
I like how comfortable you seem talking to the camera, especially when compared to your older vids where you still have the same excitement and enthusiasm for what you're doing but you seem like anyone would be restricted by what you think you're allowed or not allowed to do. It's nice seeing you enjoying that apple juice not caring because it translates even to just how you give your arguments and opinions and really makes your personality stand out more than a lot of what you're saying. I read the books and I still don't remember a thing you said about them, I'm just amused to have found a UA-camr who seems so real. Take care and stay safe!
@@xyvortex the problem with the ending of the third book when compared to the first 2 is that it sets up more story and thus isn't a completely satisfying conclusion at that point
Dagnabbit I think five was actually a pretty perfect conclusion that tied up everything pretty nicely, though it definitely could’ve ended at 3 as well. 6-8 though? Yeah was NOT a fan, definitely shouldn’t have been made imo
I find it hilarious how such sweeping changes were made to the characters of Commander Root and Butler for the sake of diversity, yet they somehow missed the fact that in the book Holly Short is described as having dark, nut-brown skin.
@@jakenbaken0047 part asian part irish so probably still looks more white than anything else really also in trying to be diverse they destroyed the whole sexism subplot
Jeremy should've praised the story line, character arcs, action sequence ect, and then revealed at the end that he was reviewing the book because the movie was dogshit.
@Stephnni yea... I really wish that all the money (125 million) that went to this Artemis Fowl movie should go for something that is much better such as big budget theatrical releases Kim Possible movie (either live action or 3D animated movie is a different story) because other than Kim Possible has more selling points than this Young Adults novel adaptation movie, this Artemis Fowl movie is clearly not going to make a lot of money. Even without the current pandemic and theaters are open like normal, this movie is clearly made to be a box office bomb. Also I can see that Kim Possible has more potential to be a successful franchise over Artemis Fowl. In the end, I really don't understand the current Disney's decision...
I mean, when the books tell the story exponentially better; they do. Cinemasins, like Jeremy Jahns, reviews movies/shows. It'd be a heck of a lot more time consuming if they reviewed the books and compared them as well.
No, but in this case they could have just given everyone different names and a different title and you probably wouldn't be able to tell it's supposed to be the same story.
@@hushkit2119 i grew up with harry potter, and AF was a very nice "what if HP was a Slytherin and had a brain" scenario for 13 y.o. me, and over the years it grew on me as its own supporting series. This movie since the trailer made me feel very angry and sad.
@@grantreid6155 he's an arrogant twat who thinks he knows better than the writers of the original work. He messed up Poirot too, Orient Express was awful. I wish he would stop getting work.
I'm seriously trying to remember when was the last time Branagh made something that was considered "good". Just off the top of my head the two most recent before Artemis Fowl were Thor (which while not terrible was a serious step down from the rest of the Marvel origin stories) and as someone pointed out Murder on the Orient Express.
I thought I would give that movie a chance, because: "it couldn't be that bad, right?". Well... After 10 minutes they messed up with do many important plot points I couldn't contain myself. I stopped the movie and started ranting to my boyfriend. Now I really need to read the books again to feel better :(
Refused to see it after the trailer. They sanitized the main character beyond recognizablity. In the books they don't need to tell you how smart Artemis Fowl is, his actions show you.
>In the books they don't need to tell you how smart Artemis Fowl is "How does on describe Artemis Fowl? Various psychiatrists have tried and failed. The main problem is Artemis's own intelligence. He bamboozles every test thrown at him. He has puzzled the greatest medical minds, and sent many of them gibbering to their own hospitals." - the first paragraph of the first book
Keep in mind that Dame Judi Dench said in a Vogue interview that she will accept most roles that come her way at this point! The latest animated film "MORTAL KOMBAT LEGENDS: SCORPIONS REVENGE" is a great addition.
The premise of the first book: Artemis Fowl kidnaps a fairy girl (who's part of a sexist police force hierarchy) and holds the fairy kingdom ransom for a fuck ton of gold to keep his family's name as the riches family in existence. The premise of the movie: what. the. fuck.
Actually Jeremy, whenever you said “we need the Brannaugh cut”, that perfectly captured my very thoughts on the film because outside of the directing and Cine photography, the movie adaption of this book franchise so totally sucked. Brannaugh introduced the world for which this book series exists and it makes new fans want to go back and read the books, but the writers of this movie took the source material and chucked it all out of the window after cherry picking the basics and scrapped the rest. The source material really did write itself and that’s sad The leads could had done so much more had they had a better script in front of them but they were handcuffed and limited. Disney played it way too safe
Jeremy: "I know nothing about the books."
Apparently nether did Disney.
Medic, medic! Mouse down, MOUSE DOWN!
Best comment tho hahaha
Nice mic drop-although there is enough of the books in here to show they looked up a wikipedia page and saw he was a antagonist in his first book and thought "nobody likes antagonists-nobody will like that as a main character or find it interesting" even though on that same Wikipedia page it will probably tell them that 25 million copies sold would disagree with that notion.
So its not about them not knowing the books-its executives thinking they know better than original writer and knowing better than 25 million fans who love the series.
Its dipshit pretentious uneducated and unintelligent executives that think they are smarter than everyone else while being the dumbest people in the room.
Seriously if the writers had just learned from the percy jackson fiasco they would have made a better film. Yet again if most companies would just fucking learn from others mistakes even 50 percent of the time these dumb film corporations (hell this goes for any entertainment company from any medium-movies-games-shows-etc) they would be lifting the fucking infinity gauntlet by now.
And that metaphor of the infinity gauntlet i got from yahtzee croshaw.
Oh dear.....
I hope they have some of that magic healing to handle that burn
The 9% is how accurate the movie is to the books
Purple Monkey
Damn you’re generous.
@@sirbillius thats word perfect what i was going to say
Got em!
It is incredibly painful just reading about what's in the movie.
I think there are 9 movies characters that have the same name as a book character.
They definitely "made it kid friendly" Artemis fowl in the books was totally ok with cutting someone's finger off to unlock a door and then re-attaching it
Fucker was a stone cold in the first book. Has enough decency to not be a total ghoul but knew how to get shit done.
And that is after he becomes less of a terrible person. That is the improved Artemis.
grim tnt kid friendly or adult viewing,a good story plot and content is still key but Disney failed in all characteristics:.that kid friendly content like Aladdin and mature content like pirates of Caribbean magic is long gone and replaced with mediocre and bad writing
Spoiler alert 😂
Diesel no one tenner how he just let butler break some ones fingers?
As someone who read the books as a kid... This movie is straight garbage.
As someone who never read the books... This movie is straight garbage.
As someone who read the graphic novels... This movie is straight garbage.
@@TheNukaColaMan10 graphic novel??
From what i heard,Artemis Fowl is like a mix between American Psycho,Die Hard,Peter Pan and Ocean´s eleven,right? I can imagine an HBO show or an animated movie. A Disney Live action doesn´t sound right. Disney,if you can´t make movies for teenagers,don´t make them and leave them to HBO,Netflix,Warner Bros or Paramount. You´ll waste money you won´t get back. just stick to remakes for dumb kids and China.
As someone who’s straight garbage... This movie is straight garbage.
My 8 year old child said immediately after the movie was over “ this movie was terrible.” My 8 year son loves everything.
My 10 year old daughter, close to to the end said, "Why does it feel like the movie is getting close to the end?"
[Feeling the same way I said]
"Because it is getting close to the end!"
"I did not liked that at all..."
My 8 year old daughter kept watching Gumball on her phone...
@@omarcrespo77 your children have taste...
Especially the 8 year old...
Give your 8 year old the books
@@joshrosal5573 Yes they do, thx!😄
@@russshipman2727 I thought the same thing!
In the books, it is revealed he's constantly wearing mirrored contract lenses that allow him to see, but reflect their magic. He's legitimately smart in the books and does smart things.
@Coconut Pal To put it to you like this. The only thing Disney got from the books are the character names. That is it. The mirrored lenses was to reflect hypnotic magic from the fairies.
@Coconut Pal A bit rusty since it has been years since I've read the books, so this might be a bit off. From what I remember the magic works by needing a direct unobstructed pathway to your eyes. Reflective sunglasses can prevent the magic from working.
Artemis wears contract lens that are hard to detect with the same properties as the sunglasses.
@@Kevin7557 Difference is, contact lenses are actually smart. Sunglasses are dumb that's supposed to add to the cool factor (but they didn't).
The best thing was Eoin Colfer was never required to explicitly state that Artemis was a genius, The Fowl way of talking and manipulating , it just shone right through. For example in the very first book, Artemis has to meet his contact on fairy information, He calmly threatens a man probably about 20 years older than him. That just showed to the reader that Artemis Fowl is a genius and that fact is cemented in its place over and over again as we keep reading through. But here they can't even do anything without saying that "Oh by the way , this guy's a genius" while doing none of the things that are supposed to make him a genius. A goddamn failure but then again , what did we expect? lol
@@straypaper Simular to the movie I believe he wears the sunglasses at first. Then takes them off in a moment of trust, but at the end of the first book reveals the contact lens were also in play. Or he revealed them mid-book. I can't remember.
Everyone: “Last Airbender was the worst live action remake”
Disney: *_”There is another...”_*
What Last Airbender movie?
Disney: Hold my apple juice. I’m about to blow your mind. 😆
Trevor Fultz Ah, smart man, smart man. Repress those memories.
Another much worse. At least last airbender had good source material.
That is a rather odd way to spell Dragon Ball Evolution
When Jeremy bring out the apple juice instead of coffee you know shit’s getting real.
No amount of juice is going to turn this into a good time though.
this movie is neither worthy of the coffee or the alcohol.
so apple juice is a good representation of that.
apple juice that makes him redder by the end of the vid
I thought that was some tequila in the thumbnail!!!! 🤣🤣🤣
I'm worried about Jeremy. You can't just turn to apple juice every time there's a tragedy. Artemis Fowl is just the next seismic act following Covid and race riots.
I love how Jeremy hasn't read the books and yet he's dead right about how they were adapted.
I didn't read them either, but I could totally tell they took out so much that it didn't even make sense.
I never read the books but given the pitch for them was literally "Die Hard with Fairies and the main character is the Hans Gruber of the story" I am still mad on behalf of book readers they made this watered down piece of crap.
Yes... deep fake Alan Rickman onto the actor who plays Artemis
I think we book readers knew not to watch this as soon as we knew Disney was making it lol
True artemis fowl starts out as a villianous criminal mastermind but becomes more sympathetic to others as the novels progress. The same audience that like artemis fowl will like ender's game both of which feature a young protagonist dealing with adult responsibility. Honestly ender's game film did the protagonist justice as it shows how the young man strategically deals with bullies and war games. However, ender's game film did poorly due to fast pacing, too straight forward and difficult to find the audience to appeal to.
I much prefer reading as Butler beats a 12 foot troll to death with his bare hands than watching it fall on him and die to gravity
@@flipthetyphoon3325 Yeah but they also get worse as he gets more sympathetic.
The end of the movie was basically that sailor moon meme lol.
"I'm Artemis Fowl, criminal Mastermind."
"But you (mostly) didn't do anything criminal throughout the whole movie, despite that being your character trait."
*Credits roll*
I'm fairly certain kidnapping someone is a crime. Because he totally kidnapped Holly.
@@PrimeofPerfection what? Naaaaah, she totally kidnapped herself!
Really though, I haven't read the books myself, but from other videos I've seen on the books review, he was supposed to be a criminal Mastermind yet, despite that kidnapping, he did virtually nothing to show him being an actual criminal or smart, and everything was kinda done for him or told to him, so big rip
Can you explain the meme? Kinda out of the loop
@@kaushikprasad2653 it's basically tuxedo mask going "I'm off!", With sailor moon going "but you didn't do anything", and he just leaves without responding
A crime? Definitely. A crime big/complex enough to make him a mastermind? Definitely not.
In the books Artemis is a genius who actually orchestrates the entire story.
What’s cool about the first book is that Artemis is legitimately the villain, but he’s a fascinating villain. He’s naïve even though he’s brilliant, and his idealism very nearly gets him killed by a bunch of fairies. He has to mature over the course of several books and they get really interesting.
Does that make him an unreliable narrator?
@@Brotherofthe4thCompany No, no one among the cast is the narrator like how Mulch apparently is in this movie.
@@CheeseMonkey18 Does he stay as an antagonistic person throughout the series?
@@owenwilkinson2649 He get a redemption arc so, of a sort? His arc develops over like 8 books. So he's a straight up villain in the first book, and gets better over time and he and Holly develop a believable relationship over time that goes from antagonistic to reluctantly working together, to working together and finally friendship.
Honestly it’s been a privilege watching the journey of your quarantine hair as it progresses to glorious lions mane.
I predict by the end of the year he'll look like Sasquatch
As a Lion myself... Jeremy looks fabulous! ;)
I love his style now. It's like he's a rough, jaded, critic who's seen too much. He's still Jeremy, but the style change is cool.
It has been a privilege gentlemen.
**plays sad violin music as COVID rages through humanity**
I predict a male version of rapunzel from tangled with with dark hair, a leather jacket, and "apple juice"
the one thing i remember from reading this book when i was younger is how artemis is a straight up ruthless criminal and somehow disney managed to water his character down completely and make him a hero of sorts???
Yeah he was straight up the bad guy until later books when someone else was the bigger threat and he started going soft. Shame we'll never get to see that on the big screen.
These people must flip everything upside down.
Don't worry he will be drinking alien titty milk in the sequel...thanks Disney👎🏾
@@scifiguy26
Lmao what's so wrong with alien tiddy milk
He made Holly think she was drugged xause he kept her in an isolated room where she xouldnt leave jus for some information about a book and Dey watered that down.
that bit in the end where Artemis and Holly were like “fOrEvEr FrIeNdS” that literally made me throw up because Holly and Artimis hate each other in the books. He literally captured her then like 5 minutes later everyones hugging and fighting and hugging
The first time they are truly face to face, Holly took the opportunity to punch him in the face and would have gladly done it again.
Never read the books but that was one of the big disconnects for me in the character development. Big issue... I still have no idea how long the main story takes place. He kidnaps her, never actually treats her well, and then within an hour (like I said, no idea how long it was supposed to take) they're suddenly best friends apparently willing to die for each other?
Made NO sense.
Similar with his big assistant, we assume they were close before the movie starts but they just seem to be friendly.
@@michaelkaufhold3126 Artemis' relationship with Butler was SO so good in the books! Like, Butler would obey him, sure, but he was never afraid to call his bullshit on and sass him when he tought Artemis was being unreasonable. There was trust, but the body-guard code didn't allow Butler to enter a more friendly/familial relationship with his charge UP UNTIL HE WAS DYING and told Artemis his name (Domovoi) because nothing else mattered.
And in this movie? It's just... bad...
@@MissShizko i knew it was gonna be bad, but when they say in the opening "never call him butler even though that's his last name" I knew it was gonna be a train wreck
To be fair, after artimis fowl helped holly out of a jam and realized the error of his ways, she did become friends with Artimis later on in the series.
And in the first book she did hate him, but still respected him.
I love how he knew that they wanted Artemis to appear more relatable and friendly.
In the books he begins as the villian!!! He is the mastermind doing hurtful things. It takes books to unpack his motivations(which were to save his parents with the wealth he gained) and have him grow and have friends.
Making Artemis stuck in this scheme of opal and his dad removes his genius of learning the elves existing and being the first human to ever outsmart the elves and work around their technology in ways they didn't even know possible. In this movie he is reactive, the books he is the sole actor and mastermind. It was doomed to fail when he became the pawn in the first movie.
Also, in the novels Artemis never really turns into a goody-two-shoes type preaching peace and love for all, even after saving the day for selfless reasons on multiple occasions. He absolutely hates seeing himself as a good guy and always likes to keep up the pretence of being a cold-hearted bastard, helping out the fairies not because he likes them but because it somehow serves his interests, even if deep down he knows perfectly well that isn't true.
Yeah if I I remember the books correctly he doesnt really become "good" until the 2nd or even 3rd book
@@yarpen26 so basically he's turns from a villain into a tsundere.
How in the worldis Disney supposed to handle that at all?
Your commentary is spot on! I too read and loved the books and even though I read them years ago, I watched this with a sense of WTF the entire film.
So right. Plus in some points he was on the brink of madness. When he was looking for the elves he was using very sketchy evidence and extreme spending to just get a book that "might" give him answers. Also it didnt feel like a kids story. If felt more adult. Sure they never get into the bad side of artemis buisness but what made him evil was the things he expirence and the people he had to deal with to get there.
Apple juice drinking, F bomb dropping, bathrobe wearing, Grown out, Quarantined Jeremy Jahns is my favorite Jahns 😂
He’s a bit more of an asshole and doesn’t seem to care about any of these movies lately.. I really like this Jahns more.
Me too. Starting to look slightly deranged. Which is great!
He does seem to be quickly morphing into The Dude
Slap List me too bro lmao. It reminds me that I don’t give two shits either and am a dickhead lmao
I love how Jeremy used to wear a blazer with no drink. And now he’s in a robe and is drinking “apple juice”
Jeremy: "I know nothing about the books."
Disney: "Same buddy. Same"
Slight book spoilers below:
When I saw Disney was gonna be doing this I already knew they were gonna muck it up. For the first book (or two, depending on how you look at it), Artemis isn't really the good guy. He's really the main antagonist of the story at first and only later on does he sort of transition into a more heroic and helpful figure. That's the biggest difference right out of the box. Oh and his dad not being involved with fairies in any way, shape or form. Or really involved much at all, actually.
The first book did take place almost entirely at his house, but it was a tense thriller because he was, well, the bad guy. We didn't really know his motives. We didn't really know his plan. Butler, while loyal, is a tad bit uneasy with how dark he thinks Artemis is going to go.
It isn't really until Opal becomes a full-fledged villain in her own right and gets somewhat obsessed with screwing over Artemis (and the world) that he moves into a more heroic pattern of stopping her (though usually with an angle to benefit himself, too).
What a waste. This could have been a fantastic movie series.
You explained this really well
@Benjamin Boerner You're absolutely right.
This movie would be great and getting a lot of benefits if this was made during the time where Disney was making Narnia and first 3 Pirates of the Caribbean movies, but sadly this movie was made during the time where Star Wars and MCU were Disney's money making machines. Neither Star Wars or MCU stuff are mostly destinied to be fail which is really sad because I don't want kids in current day or in the future to know and remembered Disney because of Star Wars and MCU movies.
So true not going to lie I was hype years ago on the thought of this happening
Haven't read the books, you make it sound like Artemis is the protagonist and antagonist at the same time, which is interesting if true.
Btw, an antagonist is a character who opposes the protagonist, they can be morally good or evil; a villain, is a character who is always morally evil.
The second I saw Hollys face and Artemis face in the trailer I knew the movie was going to be an absolute piece of s**t.
It's funny how Disney took a kids book and thought the story needed to be "kid friendly".
Sounds like Jeremy's review had a more interesting story than this movie.
I know there were callbacks and Easter eggs and everything, Disney could learn about a good plot from Jeremy
This movie makes me concerned about the Percy Jackson adaptation.
I'm not looking forward to it, especially not after how bad the movie adaptions were
@@eujoseafonso This had me confused too, but looks like there's gonna be a series on Disney plus ...
Same but it'll be adapted into a series. So hopefully we'll get something good, especially since Rick Riordan gets to be a part of the entire thing
@A Guy even with good script, disney will find a way to ruin it with its disney-fication
@@sadmansakib4063 I mean.... that's all well and good, but is he in FULL CONTROL?
Or just the script?
Because you can have a great script with a shit movie.
“Artemis:” I’m a criminal mastermind
Me: No, you’re not.
Ur not wrong he didn't do anything that's proves his a criminal
I literally said that when I heard him say that line. Honestly I'm just surprised I managed to finish the film.
The only criminal thing you did was star in this movie, kid
He didn’t even know his dad was a criminal, it’s his entire motivation
In the book he was
I’ll never understand Disney. Hey, we don’t know if this book will land and appeal to a bunch of people so we’ll make our own thing that we know doesn’t appeal to people. Come on guys, at least take the risk so you have a chance of winning.
Blame the mcu they dont take chances in the mcu so they think that will work for every property
@@Anthonycheesman33 except that Disney's been doing that long before the MCU existed and long before they owned Marvel, so the MCU has nothing to do with them making cash grabs
@@ijl007 yea but they use to take chances they dont do that now
@@Anthonycheesman33 they still take chances they just also still make cash grabs. Heck, if this movie even just used the MCU formula at least it would have been a competently put together film, a predictable one sure but one that at least executed the story in a way that was done well with things like proper acting and editing and at least a little care for the characters.
The MCU takes more risks then anything else Disney has put out lately. Guardians of the Galaxy was basically a forgotten brand before the movies rebooted them.
If Jeremy's hair gets much longer, he's going to start looking like John Wick
True lol
Alyssa Steiner You’re the 227th person to say that.
Oh look, another John Wick comment.
Facts
Jahn Wick.
The books are honestly great. Book Artemis doesn’t learn all this shit from his dad. Book Artemis’ dad has been freezing in Russian for the past two years. It was Artemis who discovers the fae, translates their language on his own with no reference whatsoever, sets a trap to capture Holly, holds her hostage for days (if not weeks, it’s been a while since I read the book) against the best and the brightest of the fae (which are very strong and have both magic and tech he’s never even dreamed about), then outsmarts them once again to get out of an impossible trap of a timestop and a bio-bomb to keep the ransom they paid for her. Yeah, Artemis Fowl is a very smart character. That was NOT Artemis Fowl.
This book was written perfectly to be adapted into an awesome, complex movie (also containing important themes like sexism, environmentalism and the such in a way that isn’t preachy or boring), but Disney had to go and turn it into another cardboard cutout of a children’s movie.
Romi Maman you’re right about the themes, when the first trailer dropped and it had Judi dench I knew something was off, coz that undercuts one of hollys big character traits. I don’t get who wrote this movie.. or why?i haven’t seen it and don’t plan on watching it either, just from the summary of the plot alone, it’s so far from the books, it’s not worth it.
"Oh hell, you too?!" - Percy Jackson and Eragon
At least Percy Jackson was midly entertaining and to be honest I really enjoyed Eragon and the last scene really got me excited for the next one... which never came
This made Percy Jackson look like Harry Potter
Percy Jackson was not nearly as bad tho
“First time?” - Percy Jackson and Eragon
@@Lloyd00 They changed so much from Eragon that a sequel was not possible until the movie itself decided to go on a tangent. The book was kinda barely-average, but at least it had a lot of interesting ideas. It's too bad that the movie did away with most of those.
Artemis Fowl was just massacred though. The movie says nothing about the books, because it's not even an adaptation.
A "smart" character is only as smart as the people writing them.
This reminds me of Angela from Eragon. Touted as witty, she was basically as clever as middle schooler making up puns.
@@buca117 I think the Author of Eragon was actually in middle school when he wrote the book
Reminds me of Tyrion Lannister of GoT show. Smart and witty character but when the showrunners ran out of Martin's source material, they started writing themselves. Needless to say it all went to shit after that.
Artemis is actually written very well as smart. The movie did no justice to the writing of Artemis.
Well said.
Book: A really well passed story about evil child genius trying to screw with bunch of techno-wizards with revolving POV characters, all with hidden agendas and special powers.
Movie: Aparently nothing about that...
I love the fact the Jeremy NEVER knows the books yet everyone still respects his reviews. Now that’s the shit!
It's because he reviews movies and as a movie, it sucks.
thekidfromcanada but still pretty cool
I think he knows harry potter...
That's because books don't matter when it comes to the movie. If the movie is only good if you've read the books then the movie sucks, if the movie is great but doesn't follow the book at all, it's still a good movie. Regardless on the source the movie needs to stand on its own. The book does not matter in this regard.
@@JonathanChute
In thi case, the movie didn't follow the books at all and sucks.
Quarantine Jeremy is my favorite Jeremy.
I'd say disney lucked out this wasn't released in theaters like it originally supposed to
"Maybe fans love the books because of its layered characters, intriguing mind games, and witty dialogues?"
"Nah, they just like fairies." Some Disney Exec, probably.
Jeremy looks like he’s slowly going insane with every review
Did you know that Jeremy's real name is glenn? It's Glendale Jeremiah jahns.
Super High Doug Judy cool
I think he is
Can ya blame him with the sh!t that came out recently? This and 365 is enough to drive anyone insane.
adnan naemaz thats a very good point
Disney can't get one live-action adaptation right, their either "fine" or just miserable to sit through. Nothing is ever substantially GOOD.
Well, let’s just make sure Disney knows how we feel about their shoddy live action remakes by not giving them money.
It happened to a lot of books by Disney,like Percy Jackson.most of them were straight trash
One main movie I can think of was Holes. Love that movie lol, although not sure how other people though about it.
Nate M an entirely different era when Disney movies were great
Hound Lock :
Exactly. Either we boycott them or we keep giving ‘em publicity. And one of those ways might change something.
Hint: it’s not the latter option.
My cat was named after Artemis Fowl
Yeah he’s a disappointment too
Lmfao
Someone should make a cat themed Artemis Fowl.
Bahahahahah
was his name Artemis Meowl?
@@brainwasher9876 Omg
“I’M MAD AS HELL AND I’M NOT GOING TO TAKE IT ANYMORE”
asian dude it’s from “Network”
Please draw a number tag from the despenser and have a seat. One of our committed ambassadors well be right with you. And please be certain to read and follow the social distancing information posted for your benifit. Thank you and come agian. ...next.
Great movie.
Sidney Lumet is such an underrated director.
Dude why are you everywhere? Literally you’re in become the knight comments AND this? Wth
"Little more apple juice... Oh, now that's way too much... Alright, I'm gonna head off to enjoy my apple juice."
I almost lost it right then. That was some funny shit.
My naive ass actually believed that was apple juice in his cup 😂
I did too, until he whipped out that Glenlivet whisky bottle
Salman Hanifa same lol
Shhhhhh, it is apple juice, just the adult kind.
Lol me too and thought I was the only one .
It's apple juice in the bottle 😇
“Make it better apple juice...” the dodge ball sound was on point 😂😂
Ikr 😂
This movie should have been rated r and executed in a dark grim humorous fashion
Disney + rated R = Never!
I guess Good Morning Vietnam isn’t rated r then
@@jarrodedson5441 they bought deadpool tho
Eh, the books aren’t really r rated though. Maybe pg13
Tbh, I'm not a big fan of that kind of thing, and I doubt Disney would've executed it well anyways.
"Chill out, UA-cam. It's just apple juice."
I love this guy!!! Lol
I thought that was funny too!
So many wrong things. Potential book spoilers.
•Artemis is a "good guy" surprised at his father's criminal acts.
•Artemis' father stole things to keep the lower elements (fairy world) a secret.
•Opal Koboi appears before the Arctic Incident. The second book.
•Root is a woman negating Holly's entire character arc of being the 1st female recon officer.
•Holly and Mulch are allies of Artemis even though Artemis was supposed to kidnap Holly for a ransom of a literal ton of gold and Mulch was brought in to rescue her.
•No ritual performed by Holly or underlying message about why the Lower Elements exists and the fairies connections to nature that humanity is destroying forcing the fairies underground.
•Apparently Briar Cudgeon is already a bad guy when he wasn't until the Arctic Incident.
•Some kind of fairy ships are on the surface world even though their secrecy is one of their core rules.
•Artemis' mother is dead so we don't see her lose her mind and show Artemis' good side by worrying about her and giving back HALF the ransom gold to cure her.
•No grand siege of Fowl Manor where we see Artemis routinely outsmart the LEP at every turn.
I'm sure there's more but these are the ones I know of.
- Butler doesn't dismantle an entire LEPRecon assault team by himself.
- Butler doesn't beat the troll unconscious by himself, with a mace, while wearing medieval armor.
@@maxx8362 Damn, then what actually happens in this movie?
They cut out the siege aspect?! What the heck?! That's the awesomest thing of the story!
Butler revealing his name
Artemis being in any way athletic. Seriously, in the second book he almost dies cause he struggles to climb a ladder...
Root is a man in the book
"I've never read the books so I'm going into this fresh"
*inward wincing*
The books are sooo good, read em!
Adam Thomasson and Artemis going from almost psychopathic to eventually a good guy is one of the most important parts
The best thing to come out of this movie are the reviews
Jeremy rocking that scruffy Wolverine haircut from X Men Origins.....
One of the few good things about that movie
@@a.t.3192 at least nobody said "X women"
@@NewOrderOfAlexandria Ugh, don't tag me with that red pill crap. It's embarrassing.
@@a.t.3192 dark phoenix is embarrassing
@@a.t.3192 Hey, the war intro was cool and Taylor was a perfect Gambit.
as time passes, jeremy gets closer and closer to being The Dude. the jeff bridges vibe is strong in this one.
The trio of bad adaptations The last Airbender, Percy Jackson, and now Artemis Fowl
Edit: I looked at the comments and I totally forgot about so many which really isn’t a good sign
I wish it was only a trio.
Eragon
Yeah there's something worse than all of them DBE
Don’t speak about the last air bender. My family still won’t let me forget I dragged them to see that.
At least A Series of Unfortunate Events was good
Amazon: The Vast of Night
Netflix: Da 5 Blood
Disney+: Artemis Fowl
Also Disney+:" I don't know why our numbers aren't going up! Throw some more garbage in here!"
Da 5 blood was great, love that movie
The vast of night was pretty epic, still to watch da 5
Vast of night was excellent. Very interesting movie.
If anybody needed any more proof that they should cancel their D+ subscrition until Mando season two comes out, well, there you have it.
Jeremy REALLY needs to keep with this look. Starting to look like a badass.
What the book is: "Die Hard with fairies"
What we wanted: A 12 year-old Irish Hans Gruber that actually gets his gold
What we got: A bizarre mix of the most boring parts of Home Alone and Darby O'Gill
He’s been drinking apple juice in that glass the whole time. I’ve been fooled
+Squidman
Looks like bourbon to me.
Maybe even tricked!
Quite possibly backstabbed!
Most certainly bamboozled!
5:17 yes...apple juice.
Xander Ellem so weird that he put his apple juice in that bottle!
@@thealjohnsonshow2188 it's scotch. Glenlivet 15. Speyside single malt.
When the review is better then the movie.
From the words of ScreenRant’s “Pitch Meeting”
Artemis Fowl is super smart and intelligent, don’t worry that’s “super easy, barely any inconvenience”.
Jeremy looks like Bruce Wayne in the Dark Knight Rises.
You’re right.
I understood that reference
I just realized this lol
Because of the beard and dressing gown?
If Jeremy has become Bruce Wayne from the Dark Knight Rises, does that mean it is only a matter of time till a woman dressed as a cat breaks into his house? Gasp, Jeremy watch out! Judi Dench is coming for your mothers pearls!!!
Maybe the reason they couldn’t do the books is because they would need to bring in the Russian Mafia and that would insult Disney’s investors
I mean, the Russian Mafia is not at all in the first book, so there's no need at all to say Russian Mafia. And even if you do want to include the dad-story (or make the second book into a movie) you could make it just random criminals.
I’m honestly amazed they could screw up a movie so bad with source material like Artemis fowl
Bad movies have been made before that were literally based on actually good movies...like Ghostbusters or The last airbender
Dragonball Evolution......... anybody remember that shit storm
Silverfox I’m aware,but you would think Hollywood or at least the directors would learn what not to do with the characters and world there representing
Tushar Kanthi sadly I do lol
Considering the only bits of the source material they used were superficial at best, I can't say I'm surprised it didnt live up to anything passable.
I like how comfortable you seem talking to the camera, especially when compared to your older vids where you still have the same excitement and enthusiasm for what you're doing but you seem like anyone would be restricted by what you think you're allowed or not allowed to do. It's nice seeing you enjoying that apple juice not caring because it translates even to just how you give your arguments and opinions and really makes your personality stand out more than a lot of what you're saying. I read the books and I still don't remember a thing you said about them, I'm just amused to have found a UA-camr who seems so real. Take care and stay safe!
I don’t know. He looks more uncomfortable than I’ve ever seen him on camera. Lol
I think all the 'apple juice' probably helps
I really was expecting an apple juice bottle when he said, “more apple juice.”
As soon as I heard the idea behind the movie I thought “I should read that”. Why didn’t disney think the same?
Read it the book is amazing
Snag the first 3 books they're a great trilogy plus there's 5 more after that
@@jmm394 You're right, though I thought the last five felt unnaturally stretched. The series was great at three.
@@xyvortex the problem with the ending of the third book when compared to the first 2 is that it sets up more story and thus isn't a completely satisfying conclusion at that point
Dagnabbit I think five was actually a pretty perfect conclusion that tied up everything pretty nicely, though it definitely could’ve ended at 3 as well. 6-8 though? Yeah was NOT a fan, definitely shouldn’t have been made imo
"Make it better apple juice."
Genuinely one of the best reviews Jeremy has done in ages.
“I abhor the sensation of having my time wasted.” Very aptly put!
I loved the books as a kid, and so I must consider this movie a hate crime.
I find it hilarious how such sweeping changes were made to the characters of Commander Root and Butler for the sake of diversity, yet they somehow missed the fact that in the book Holly Short is described as having dark, nut-brown skin.
The good old passive progressives at Disney. They aren't really known for their risk taking over there.
And I thought Butler was supposed to be Asian from what I remember reading the books.
@@jakenbaken0047 part asian part irish so probably still looks more white than anything else really also in trying to be diverse they destroyed the whole sexism subplot
@@jakenbaken0047 More on the side of an Irishman than an Asian person.
@@donb7519 They're blindingly stupid for the sake of seeming progressive.
I feel like I’m gonna see this movie on jeremys worst movies of 2020
It's already on My list
Thats going to be a really short list. Not that many movies came out cause of the pandemic
This movie translated to the books as much as the Percy Jackson movies related to the books. To say, other than in name, yeah there's nothing.
Percy Jackson could have translated a lot better tbh.
Percy Jackson movies weren't THAT bad.
Jeremy should've praised the story line, character arcs, action sequence ect, and then revealed at the end that he was reviewing the book because the movie was dogshit.
Now that would have been a great review
I honestly felt like the money spent on this movie was a waste😫😫
@Stephnni yea...
I really wish that all the money (125 million) that went to this Artemis Fowl movie should go for something that is much better such as big budget theatrical releases Kim Possible movie (either live action or 3D animated movie is a different story) because other than Kim Possible has more selling points than this Young Adults novel adaptation movie, this Artemis Fowl movie is clearly not going to make a lot of money. Even without the current pandemic and theaters are open like normal, this movie is clearly made to be a box office bomb.
Also I can see that Kim Possible has more potential to be a successful franchise over Artemis Fowl.
In the end, I really don't understand the current Disney's decision...
When did John wick start hosting this channel
I likey.
After he finished filming for part 4
He retired and makes UA-cam video
Jeremy wearing his robe should tell you enough.
As this other person coincidentally named Jeremy said: "The books don't matter."
I mean, when the books tell the story exponentially better; they do.
Cinemasins, like Jeremy Jahns, reviews movies/shows. It'd be a heck of a lot more time consuming if they reviewed the books and compared them as well.
No, but in this case they could have just given everyone different names and a different title and you probably wouldn't be able to tell it's supposed to be the same story.
Please read the books, this is just a 'murica bad action movie with a bought off title. Artemis Fowl is actually really good.
Edoardo Prevelato that’s the rumor
As an American, I claim no responsibility for this rip-off of an amazing series.
@@hushkit2119 i grew up with harry potter, and AF was a very nice "what if HP was a Slytherin and had a brain" scenario for 13 y.o. me, and over the years it grew on me as its own supporting series. This movie since the trailer made me feel very angry and sad.
I might take you up on that; been looking for more good books to read.
@@keystrix3704 alternatively, the first four books have a graphic novel version easily found online for free
Jeremy approaching Endgame Thor
I say more like captain america in infinity war
Yeah idk I don’t see his gut! 😂
The hair, the bathrobe, the apple juice....I’m legitimately concerned for Keanu Reeve’s nerd brother...Lmao! Get. It. Together. Jahns. 😂😅
Do the 50 shades of grey review again while drinking, that’ll be gold😂
Even better, he should review 365 days
I watched all three parts of the "folding Ideas" channel about those movies....
I felt so bad for him....
I dont think it could be better. Still my favorite review of anything ever.
Black Ninja ??
Kenneth Branagh already admitted some time ago that most of the changes to the book were his idea, so this pretty much is the Branagh Cut.
Why does Branagh do this 😭
@@grantreid6155 he's an arrogant twat who thinks he knows better than the writers of the original work. He messed up Poirot too, Orient Express was awful. I wish he would stop getting work.
I'm seriously trying to remember when was the last time Branagh made something that was considered "good". Just off the top of my head the two most recent before Artemis Fowl were Thor (which while not terrible was a serious step down from the rest of the Marvel origin stories) and as someone pointed out Murder on the Orient Express.
@@jacobw703 Henry V.
@@rainbowblackout Sounds about right.
The Irish accents in this film make Tom Cruises accent in Far and Away seem plausible.
Lol
They're real Irish accents. Most of the actors are Irish
As a fan of the books, I was smart enough to avoid this as soon as I saw the trailers. Disney should just lay off the books
Jeremy's Alcoholic Wizard aesthetic is more interesting than anything in this movie.
I thought I would give that movie a chance, because: "it couldn't be that bad, right?". Well... After 10 minutes they messed up with do many important plot points I couldn't contain myself. I stopped the movie and started ranting to my boyfriend. Now I really need to read the books again to feel better :(
Refused to see it after the trailer. They sanitized the main character beyond recognizablity. In the books they don't need to tell you how smart Artemis Fowl is, his actions show you.
They actually did
the trailer was closer to the books than the movie, the Ho Chi Minh City scene from the trailer? not even in the movie.
@@relativelyjilly so basically, The Last Airbender again.
>In the books they don't need to tell you how smart Artemis Fowl is
"How does on describe Artemis Fowl? Various psychiatrists have tried and failed. The main problem is Artemis's own intelligence. He bamboozles every test thrown at him. He has puzzled the greatest medical minds, and sent many of them gibbering to their own hospitals." - the first paragraph of the first book
@@PK_Scratch not even close
I need “make it better Applejuice” on a shirt😂
Pay rent 😂
Fans: they didnt follow the books at all!
Disney: whats a book?
The whole time I was thinking’ “ who puts ice in apple juice?” Then it made sense...
now there are rules? hahah tell me more about them.
Wait... you dont put ice in apple juice?!
Glenlivet 15 on the rocks is ruining a good glenlivet D:
@ɮօʊռċɛ օʄʄ Trust.... my only weakness
"Look out Avatar 2, Artemis Fowl has set the bar now" 😂😂😂😂LMAO
Artemis Fowl is like an old enemy you once thought dead but came back with a vengeance
Keep in mind that Dame Judi Dench said in a Vogue interview that she will accept most roles that come her way at this point!
The latest animated film "MORTAL KOMBAT LEGENDS: SCORPIONS REVENGE" is a great addition.
Member when Jeremy had an earring?
Well, he is wolverine now!
Love how Jeremy's been morphing into an amalgamation of John Wick and The Dude 😂
Sometimes I forget that there was a Dark Tower movie... then I remember :(
Oh God thanks for reminding me
“Atrocious Foul” would be a more appropriate title
Artemis Shit.
May we say it was a... (sunglasses on) ... foul play on Disney's part? (opening credits music rolls) :)
Atrocious Fail more like
Utter misfire
When jeremyjahns talks like the Disney executive, it reminds me of the Disney executive from the warpzone
Jeremy slowly turning into "The Dude", all he needs is a White Russian
bring a bowling ball to the reviews
there are black russians also?
@@Archonsx yes, there are.
Ain't nothing wrong with that. :)
"Chill out UA-cam, it's just apple juice"... "I'm running out, need more apple juice"... "Little more apple juice 𝅘𝅥𝅮" - comedy gold :D
"I know nothing about the books"
Neither did the writers
“If The Santa Clause didn’t have a soul.” So, it’s The Santa Clause 3?
The premise of the first book: Artemis Fowl kidnaps a fairy girl (who's part of a sexist police force hierarchy) and holds the fairy kingdom ransom for a fuck ton of gold to keep his family's name as the riches family in existence.
The premise of the movie: what. the. fuck.
Actually, he had a partially decent motivation, which was to heal his mother.
“Chill out UA-cam it’s just apple juice.” 🤣🤣🤣🤣
Actually Jeremy, whenever you said “we need the Brannaugh cut”, that perfectly captured my very thoughts on the film because outside of the directing and Cine photography, the movie adaption of this book franchise so totally sucked.
Brannaugh introduced the world for which this book series exists and it makes new fans want to go back and read the books, but the writers of this movie took the source material and chucked it all out of the window after cherry picking the basics and scrapped the rest.
The source material really did write itself and that’s sad
The leads could had done so much more had they had a better script in front of them but they were handcuffed and limited.
Disney played it way too safe