"Jesus & The Apostles" - Jim Gaffigan Stand up (King Baby)
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- Опубліковано 6 чер 2020
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Stand Up for the Pope + ACTUAL FOOTAGE • Doing stand up for the...
Least favorite Dr Visit • "My Least Favorite Doc...
LETS GET COOKIN' (World’s Favorite Quarantine Cooking Show)
Toast (EP 1) • "Let's Get Cookin' - T...
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Mikey Takes over (EP 10) • "Let's Get Cookin' - M...
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Garbage Plate (EP 12) • "Let's Get Cookin' - G...
Chicken Fillet (EP 13) • "Let's Get Cookin' - C...
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BOLOGNA • Mike and Pat Show: Bol...
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My Kids React to my 1st Stand Up Special • "MY KIDS REACT: To My ...
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#JIMGAFFIGAN #StandUpComedy #Jesus&TheApostles - Розваги
That Jesus carpentry joke was genius. So much good stuff in this one.
that whispering voice he does cracks me up, reminds me of the older women in church whose sole purpose in life was to judge you every sunday.
Jim kills me when he does that whispering lady voice.
Same! It will always be funny!
I know. The joke could be fine and funny. But when he adds that whispering "inner voice of the audience" - that's just gravy!
I live for that voice... 😂🤣😂
"He's going to hell for that..."
Can it be said that this is the voice of Karen
I openly guffawed and almost spit out my coffee several moments in this. Thanks Jim for helping us get thru the pandemic!
“No we can bring the pole...”
-Jesus
Haha love this line
I just love him!! Such smart jokes without the F word, and I have to say, it takes a lot if imagination to accomplish such. Can't find no one funnier in this time and age! Keep up Mr. Gaffigan!
"the apostle from Brooklyn" 😂😂😂
I just love his Italian Mobster impression! So funny lol
“We look like a homeless football team”
Im sure Jesus laughs about that one
Your right on that, God Bless!!!
Jesus loves Jim
He makes the apostles sound like they should have been in "Good Fellas"
I suppose you mean: "God Fellas" ?
@Bernard Sherry: The thought of Judas asking Peter or James, “You think I’m funny? Funny how? Like I amuse you?” is horrifying
I'm not Catholic, but the "let's stay late and talk to the weirdest people here!" is apparently a universal Christian thing 😂
Last time I went to church with my mom, an adult woman asked me to braid her hair.
😁😁😁
I love how Jim’s critic voice sounds like a menopausal woman from the Midwest in sensible shoes. Cracks me up every time.
Probably a Karen 😂
His Meta voice is classic!
That’s ……. Specific
omg your comment is HILARIOUS!! 😆🤣😂
Adam & Eve, the first people to not read the apple Terms & Conditions.
... does anyone read those? 🤔
Lmao 🤣
Adam and Steve Jobs.
. Mlm
M m N hv b m
This is such an underrated joke. This was golden.
As a Catholic I am highly entertained by these jokes. Well, going to confession now. See you later.
What's the penance for laughing at Jesus jokes?
Incredible fail.
AaaAaaAaaAa AaaAaAmen…let’s wrap it up, I got some sinning to do 😂
@@con.troller4183Jesus’ forgiveness. Thats the “penance” ☺️🙏🏼
Our father.. without the written consent of major league baseball...
Jim is funny without being vulgar and that is a talent
I watched this set, watched online Sunday Mass and then watched this again. 😇
Jim gaffigan is literally the funniest guy I ever saw live or otherwise.... and he doesn’t have to cuss....
Yeah, no cussing makes it soooooo much better. It's perfect comedy for children
I actually think it's harder to do good comedy without cussing, so hat is off to him.
Jim is the best thing to watch at night to pass time 🙂
And giggles before sleeping
Really great delivery and very clever original material! Awesome job!
I'm from West Virginia and I relate to the joke about West Virginia's slogan.
Just stay away from high tide on Magic Island right?
Jim's inner conscience needs to have it's own stand-up skit..
It would be interesting to see it reversed, where occasionally jim pipes in but his other voice does most the jokes
Of course we'd love our son to see those shelves !! Omg I am still laughing!
The "stick up the butt, under the breath, 'audience' " responses are the reason Jim's the best!
Gaffigan has a formula that delivers a laugh, on average, every 6 seconds with out fail. Every 5 jokes is a huge laugh, and the cycle repeats. He is a genius.
Let's get prayin'
"Of course we'd love our son to see those shellvveesss...."
THE funniest bit.
The first time I heard that bit I thought "This is perfect genius"
"But we can still get the jackets right?"
Maybe my favorite Jim Gaffigan line of all time.
Still funny. King Baby is probably my favorite .
I always thought that painting of the lalst supper should have been subtitled " 12 guys arguing over the dinner bill" as in " OK who had the tuna on toast and a iced tea? "
Too short, Jim. We just want you to feel bad for an hour.
Every Jim Gaffigan UA-cam video has a bad part. It's the part that is so disappointing. It's when it stops and we don't get any more. How can we get it to loop like Mass?
I'm going to hell for liking this. And all my friends will be there so it's cool.
What room are you stayin' in?
Ofcourse you gotta look through other people's stuff. What I'd they are murders.
I can't believe that Jim Gaffigan one of the greatest comedians of all time only has four hundred and fiver thousand subscribers, what is wrong with people these days.
Little known fact..........West Virginia is almost like heaven but Georgia is almost like hell. That's why the devil went down there and played musical instruments.
I can listen to, Jim Gaffigan, over and over, and always laugh.
Jim is hilarious. I have watched many of his videos over and over. Thanks much to whoever uploaded them. They are very ideal to get laughs from during this pandemic. Many places are still in lockdown mode. Jim's humor is a great relief!
I agree, I’ve been watching them and I can feel the tension leaving my neck and shoulders
This counts as church, right?
Perfect!!
I hope so!
If you laughed then no
So last Sunday our Archbishop let us go back to church, but only with social distancing and mask-wearing. 200 people, only 12 masks. And no, I didn't wear one either. Today, different Mass time, 200 people, 8 masks. My parish isn't buying this panic stuff!
Keith Michael Kerscher great joke! LMFAO! Man...hehehaha...how do you come up with material like this?!?
Hands down my favorite comedian, drop that new hour special I need it!
Fresh true catholic jokes always fun. Thx Jim
Enjoyed laughing this morning😂.
Jesus: table for 26
Waiter: but there are only 13 of you
Jesus: yeah but we're all sitting on the same side.
Saw it on ig and thought ppl would like it
... the original restaurant selfie
"ig"?
@@YaoEspirito Instagram
How do they split the check?
Technically, it was still a table for 13, because the waiters only had to serve 13 people - unless you count the Holy Spirit - that guy's ALWAYS crashing parties and eating everyone else's food.
Best of best of best wishes and THX for your humor during these horrible times. I was crying a few minutes ago watching the news.
"Who's cooking the feet?" "They're done." heheheheheheheheh This comedy idea may be your new Hot Pockets joke. "Have you tried the new parmesan hot pocket?" In the whispering voice, "Yeah smells just like feet, tastes like it too... he's ruined hot pockets for me." I know Jim you want to leave that hot pocket treasure behind but it's comedy gold. In fact all your comedy is golden. Thank you.
Favorite comedian of all time.
The Catholic jokes get me every single time (all his jokes do LoL) but those Catholic jokes are so relatable 😄
That's for sure. Jim should do jokes about Lent.
My sister always gives me attitude because I never follow the rules for Lent.
@@erinstanger416 I laughed out loud when he said the line about talking to all the weirdest people after mass 😂😂 because that's definitely what my mom did and as a child I remember the whole process of going to mass, that slow after mass shuffle to the exit, and the crowds all talking outside felt like an eternity LoL. Oh and if you had a crying baby at mass forget about it! 😂 You were basically starred at like an nuisance the whole time.
Jim is just plain funny no matter what the subject matter. Love this guy. He is funny and does clean material. 💕
I love how you come with your own heckler AHAHAH
Jim is such a goofball! I love him!
0:16 That’s basically the prayer in the garden of gethsethame 😂
Holy cow that was good. Haven’t laughed that hard in a while. ❤
You and your wife are the greatest funniest couple , and kids are right behind you , Bless you all and keep having FUN. !!!😀
"We'll all be martyred." Close. John of Patmos lived out his life to die of natural causes. This fellow was the only exception.
Yes, though the Romans sure tried!
Did he get the jacket?
"We're thinking, uh, breakfast around 7..."
*THINK AGAIN!*
🤗 Brilliant! My favorite so far. The thing with Jesus and the apostilles was hysterical!
🕊️That was Perfectly Hilariously and Wonderfully Funny - All at the same time! ! 😂👍 Thank you Mr. Gaffighan 😂👍
One apostle is from Boston. ❤️🤣😂
That was fun. Thank you.
Thanks
Jim is brilliant!!!
Loved this one!Im sure God has a great sense of humour to put up with all of us...
Dori Logan
"I tremble for my countrymen, when I realize, we serve a God who is Just.....
---Thomas Jefferson
“Nice of you to join us” ...who hasn’t heard that when visiting. You’ve slept in, they’re dressed and sitting at the breakfast table...now I’ll feel bad for an hour..
Will I go to Purgatory if I watch this? Asking for someone who is praying I get Purgatory. 🙏
Timothy Wallace does not exist
No child, humor is good🙏✝️💜👰
No. Since Jesus died to pay the penalty for our sin, and said it is finished, we don't pay the penalty for our sin. If we don't receive Jesus , and therefore pay the eternal penalty for our sin , there's no temporary place like purgatory .
You had me at water into wine..
LOL😂🤣😂 Your just so freaking HILARIOUS🤣 Thank you for keeping me laughing&smiling Mr.Gaffigan🙂 Favorite comedian by far👍😄😁
One of the best from the Gaffman!
My life needs editing.
S ame
I really needed a laugh tonight. Thanks
I love that he is a man of faith and can also see the humor in religion.
How does he only have 400k subscribers this guy is hilarious
(In a womans whisper): " oh... he's definitely going to hell for this...."
"I'm not an alcoholic, I just need a place dedicated to booze. Here's where we watch TV, I get tanked over there, porn closet here, crack den is downstairs" 🤣🤣🤣
We need the shelves by Tuesday 😂
Yes, this episode does count as Church!
While following Jesus around the Disciples look like a "homeless football team"😂
Love you stuff Jim!!!
Love what a talented dude o
YOU DONT NEED TO HUSSEL FOR SUBSCRIBERS.....YOU ARE ONE OF THE BEST!!
I am really enjoying his comedy. I have started listening to many comedians I never listened to in the past. Great stuff. Lots of new material for me discover.
Good on Jim for sharing bits and pieces of his shows over the years for free however it is doing my head in to see his weight fluctuate, I'm trying to figure out the difference in terms of HOT POCKETS!
How do I manage to keep coming back here? Good stuff!
0:10 Isn't that basically what he did when he said 'if it's possible, may this cup be taken from me.'?
I was thinking exactly the same. But he is a Catholic, and we all know they don’t read the Bible. 😂
Jannette Berends true. I just posted the verse. Then I see this. Jesus is my Lord. I grew up Catholic.
That is EXACTLY right. And Jesus is NOT my Lord and Savior. From the looks of things today, it looks like he's NOBODY'S Lord and Savior.
@Thor Odinson -- Except those 400,000 people who died of covid, right? And if you say he's taken them to be with him, well then, that must make YOU unworthy, because he's left your piddling little ass on Earth, baby boy. Jesus obviously hates you.
Jon Dunmore that doesn’t mean that he isn’t our savior. If you read the next line he says to the Father “Thy will be done”. In other points he says stuff like “The spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak.” This means that as a human he was scared, but he still wanted to go through with it. And you would be scared too, death by Cruxifixction was probably the worst execution method ever. So, what makes you say that Jesus is not Lord?
Jim, you're killing my guts!
I just binge watch all Jim's videos on Netflix, last week...
There is proof that God has a sense of humor: Platypus.
The platypus: God's way of making scientists crap their pants.
The platypus was created by a volunteer committee of artists ! !
@@paulinelarson465 ...who were on shrooms and LSD at the time.
The giraffe is another example of God sense of humor. A horse on toothpick legs and a super long neck plus spotted!
Almighty God has no sense of humor.
Ask William Jefferson Clinton.....
I love your jokes about religion, they are hilarious without being degrading to believers! Ur family is so cute, u seem like such a fun dad!
So, you're ok with blasphemy? ☹️
@@TSeeker1 his jokes are more the opposite of blasphemy, he never says God isnt real, and in fact pokes fun at biblical characters, while validating their existence. Dont be a prune. God made everything, including Jim Gaffigan, knowing full well what he was creating.
@@Rachel-pl5rk Then you don't know what blasphemy is. If you knew personally the Lord Jesus Christ, you wouldn't be laughing. Just because He created someone who chooses to make light of Him, doesn't mean He approves of the sin.
@@TSeeker1 Blasphemy? Like holding the Holy Bible upside down for a photo-op after
having hired riot control personnel for beating.gassing ,shooting and clubbing churchgoers,the protestors, and assaulting the Pastor ? How much more graphic would you need?
@
Ask Him.....
The Patriot Prepper Food commercial is adorable. Two really cute kids!
LoL! Awesome.
Love you Gaffigoon
One of the greats.
The Disciples. Like they're a Motorcycle Club!
LMAO!!!!
He has made me feel better 😽
RELEASE THE STANDUP!!!
The best
Love me some JC jokes from Jimmy G 🙂
dopeee, big fan of Gaffigan!
I feel like I went to mass after watching this
Jim is usually so clean and pure he's like the Jesus of stand up.
Even God loves jokes -- Plato
Yes, he made all of us ....
How would Plato know God?
"Git some leatha jackitssssssss...."
"Git a big bird on da baaaaaack....."
A dove! lol
*Hee Hee Intensifies*
I appreciate how Jim is overtly conditioning us using Pavlovian theory in his subscribe requests at the end of these videos! :D
"Your going to hell for that one" as you whisper. Bahahahaha. YOUR STILL GOING TO HELL. BAHAHAHAHA, JK
Apostles...Disciples..."Greasers"...they all need their leather jackets with the Thunderbird insignia, lol!
I saw the Chirp Wheel commercial before this video. it was incredible. Laugh riot.
Thank you for the religion jokes. Stay on it. And Jesus did ask not to have that job. "Take this cup from me."