Kidnapping and Abuse Allegations
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- Опубліковано 13 гру 2022
- The plaintiff says she has a child with the defendant, and she claims he and his new wife kidnapped her daughter and then told Child Protective Services that she duct-taped her child and fed her alcohol. She’s suing for defamation. The defendants say the plaintiff’s mother is raising the child, and they claim the child doesn’t feel safe in the plaintiff’s home. They deny kidnapping the child and they’re countersuing for defamation and emotional distress.
- Розваги
The fact that she allowed him to speak for himself until he needed her to intervene and she STEPPED for the case to turn over. That’s a a real one. Praying for the baby girl.
Period
That part!
Absolutely 💯
Fellas. This is a WIFE , not a trophy. He would’ve indefinitely lost had he not had a woman like that by his side
She's Wicked...
Say it louder for the people in the back
Big Facts
@@americalove9495 lol the plaintiffs are wicked. Poor kid man smh has to grow up in this barbaric environment
@@americalove9495 You must be the plaintiff's mama. 😂
The wife came in with the receipts!!! 😂👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽
Facts! She saved the day!
Hell yeah!!
Now that’s a stepmother ❤
Ik the father and his wife
Receipts and the cash register!
I love how the wife said “hes nervous” and stepped in 😂. It shows that not only that she cares about him bein represented right but also didnt want his daughter to go through what momma was puttin her through! Sucha dope ass woman 🤌🏾🔥
She came through with the Hail Mary and shut that case DOWWWWWWWN!!!!
@@TheBulletproof5oulQuick, fast 💨 & in a hurry! She’s a REAL one!
Her man is dumb. Sad
Facts !!
My friends real mom is technically her step mom. But she’s the mom who STEPPED UP AND STAYED. I’m adopted and can tell you, the parent who stayed and supported you is your real parent. Baby girl has at least one mama who will do right by her, the fact she didn’t birth her has very little to do with this
The stepmother is a wonderful woman and did everything within her power to protect this child, more than her own mother did!.
💯
Not sure i agree something not right about either, the grandmother is not fully forthcoming with daughter either, and the burn happened under grandmothers care, they filed a report slandered mother, you cant say anything is true if it was found unfounded, not sure i like the father at all if meant to return a child court ordered its a breach, and mother paid for camp no compensation for that. This there was wrong on both sides.
Imagine suing and getting it dismissed and now you owe them
Love it when they sue then wind up owing
POW! 👊🏾
after calling police then getting CPS investigated on you. The greed ain't win here and the same happened with my husband and (step)son. Truth and just treatment prevailed, false claims for money and custody failed.
How does the mother “NOT KNOW” how “HER CHILD” received burn marks on HER FACE!!!???
They talk shit about men being shitty fathers. He may not be the "sharpest tool in the shed" as they say but I'd take him as my daughter's father ANYDAY over what I got stuck with! Lol
@@RayRay-nn4wk I know she a vile person the child better of with the dad
@@RayRay-nn4wk lol I’m a excellent father 😏whenever you ready
She's guilty, complicit, and violent. Just bc you're a female that doesn't make you a good mother. I hope he gets full custody and protects his daughter.
Let's be real: because the mom don't raise her kids. The grandma watch the baby and that's all that is.
Not the cry at the end.
Not grandma ready to fight. I hope the daughter isn’t in that house anymore!
😂😭
That cry was like damn, he found him a wife and I gotta bum beating my ass
The ready to fight part was wild…I don’t know who she thought was shaking in their boots from her running at them
@@ayana188 facts 😂😂
“Don’t come over here girl this ain’t whatchu want” 😂big country mama wasnt playin
the defendant is the reason why you need a strong woman lmao he would’ve LOST!!
LOL 🤣🤣🤣 TRUE,;
He most certainly would have!!!
BIG TIME!
You are 100% correct lol some of us women know how to open our mouth and handle shit 🤣🤣
So very true!
Lol as a man I agree. Women can articulate things better than us
A wife, a lawyer, and a queen all in one.
You missed and A Mother❤️
Grandma trying to cover for her daughter but she's embarrassing herself 🤦🏿♀️
Ole girl want to fight! She looking for an early grave and hymn singing!
And she is supposed to be protecting her grand daughter, I don't know what kind of grandma she is
“Tell ya momma don’t come over here, this ain’t what you want!” Best line I’ve heard on the JM show!
@@xg8329 omg log off...🤣🤣
@@xg8329 🤣🤣🤣
The wife said “This ain’t what you want!”😂😂😂😂
Too funny 😂😂😂
Filing a false kidnapping report is a crime.
A felony isn’t it?
@@traceyjackson4470 I think so.
It surely is.
@@traceyjackson4470 I believe that it is.
@@misterbee66 💯
Damn. This case was crazy. Parents should always protect their babies. No child should have to be fearful going home.
Amen!!
kids will sometimes say what the other parent wants them to say. If that was true, why didn't DHS step in, they didn't find any cause.
@Donald Johnson The stepmother came in receipts though including police reports filed from physical violence and altercations btwn the biological mother and her boyfriend. The child stated she didn't like going home bc of the chaos involving the biological mother's boyfriend. The mother's boyfriend is problematic and the mother is allowing it
@@donaldjohnson854 DHS screws up a lot .
The fact that she had the AUDACITY to come to court w/ all that baggage! Girl!! Pack it up and catch a flight cus you knew better.
Lmfao!!
Ooop
Yasss gurrl!!!
😂
I dont think she knew better. The mom seemed a little delayed. So did the Dad so maybe the daughter is too. I’d hate for 10 yrs from now the daughter admits to lying or being coerced. I thought it was suggestive they asked the daughter if she wanted to go back and I sense a lil animosity from the new wife.
Judge- as soon as a child’s safety was involved he went straight commando! No funny judge business here. I LOVE THIS JUDGE!
😂
I’m glad he cut out all the games bcuz kids aren’t a joking matter
@@JM_HUhhe always does when kids are involved
This wife was on point. The judge was pissed. I knew they won 😂
That was sn easy case🤣🤣🤣
Soon as he turned up it was a wrap.
I remember this episode. The wife came through with a 3 at the buzzer 💪🏾
Didn't she tho 💯💯💯...
I've been looking for this episode. Game over if it not for the wife lol
Steph Curry wit it cuz buddy was shaky
Yes classic lol the wife came ready
Indeed
it’s weird how the mom didn’t know how her young daughter had a burn mark on her cheek but all of a sudden grandma knew what happened 🤔 sounds like the grandma made that up to cover her daughter’s ass smh. I believe the defendants the plaintiffs came off suspect as hell
Ion think an egg did that though
I cry with what these children and many adults had to endure growing up in homes where there is so much chaos, confusion and downright abuse
Nah as a kid of an independent who worked all the time I would show up with burns and bruises all the time. My mom got tired of asking
The father's wife had time for them! And she was right when the wife said she had a good man and she messed it up. I commend the father and wife. The plaintiff showed her misery crying in the corner.
The “mom” 🎵put on quite a show, VE-RY EN-TER-TAIN-ING, Please!🎶 💀💀💀
High
You reap what you sow... lol
Thank goodness he just couldn't verbalize... 🤦🏾♀️
What was soo good about the man?
I am glad he had someone to speak up for him . I can certainly understand how hard it is to get out what you are really trying to say. ❤
😊 Agree. Women tend to be more **Verbal** and better communicators than most Men.
I'm sorry but I gave up on the plaintiff when it was confirmed, early on that she don't even take care of her children!
So why is she bouncing her behind up in court trying to sue over children she don't even have!
That tells you right there, this was a Spite move.
Like her or not, the father's wife was ready for they BS and seeing how that Grandma reacted at the end proves they bring a bunch of drama & BS. I'm actually quite pleased with Judge Mathis judgement.
The wife said, "don"t come over here this ain't what you want" lmaooo
The phony cry in the end with Grandma looking like a spider monkey wanting to jump someone 5 sizes bigger was hilarious
I love the defendant and his wife. ❤
The wife did a complete turn around of this case and threw coals on the fire, straight steam rolling through this case! She cleared the game- home run. Killed it. Good for that baby! I hope she overcomes the challenges she may of faced and more to come.
LMAO your description!
You Just Want My Husband 🤣💯
Stepped up to the plate and hit a homerun!! 😂❤
Periiooddd!!
Do not underestimate the power of love between a father and daughter..
WOWWW THANK U FOR THAT MOST POWERFUL COMMENT JULIE .SO MANY WILL B ⚡ TOUCHED READING IT & _ ITS FACTS 💛 2!!
Or daughter and stepmom. Bcus her father cannot speak up for her in court, his wife had to 💀💀💀
A father's wife and his daughter. She was fighting harder than him.
@@rachaelnwaoha3543 facts
@@saturnladee110 and that's the part people are looking over.... We are witnessing the decline of masculinity in our men because it has been shamed... Now the women have to lead 🤦🏿
Babyyyy, it was the wife saying, " Don't come over here, this ain't watcha want." She had time today for them. If it wasn't for his wife, they would have lost this case. She was the star in this case 🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾
I'm more worried about the child that anything else. What the father should have done was ask judge Mathis for some help to get full custody of his child.
ABSOLUTELYYYYYYYYYYYY & I HOPEFULLY THEY RECONNECTED WITH HIM TO DO SO OR GET GUIDANCE ON IT....IM WORRIED 😟 FOR THE CHILD 🚸 TOO..SHE IN A STATE OF FEAR 😨 THAT NEED NOT BE_😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡
Hopefully she is still with the father and stepmother
Facts
@@keisha1781 let's hope.
Weak Watered Down Daddy DOESN'T need Full Custody of the Daughter. He had better find a way to make thing's right with that Child's Mother. 🤔
i am having a hard time believing small hands picking up a egg still in a boiling pot
Why did Melissa’s face get burned from the eggs in boiling water and not her hands????
@@traceyjackson4470 plaintiff boyfriend burned the child's face with a cigarette or the daughter sustained that injury after being kicked off the bed
Grandmother said the water from the boiling eggs splashed the child.
@@justcurious81 I've been around boiling water. There's no way an entire pot of boiling water just splashes you in the face to just form a stab. Otherwise, half of her face should've been burned
The plaintiff’s mother is part of her problem. When the wife told the plaintiff’s mother “don’t come over here, this is not what you want”. I was done 😮
she definitely enables her bullshit smh
Whoever this “Melissa” child is she gonna need some SERIOUS counseling after being with these messy adults!!
Sad part is they never seem to get counseling, just grow up passing on the same behaviors they learned. Prayerfully, Melissa will turn out differently. Let us all pray for this precious one.
I only see 2 messy people that's the mammy and grandmammy!
Exactly
Lmao granny need to stop acting like she really was about to do something at the end
Bryan Johnson granny didn't want that smoke!
Was about to do nothing, rofl.
Anybody else laughed at the end "Girl, This ain't what you want"🤣 Girl getcho ass up crying and shit 🤣 The wife had time today 😂
Lol took me out
@@DeuceSSS1845 I watched the ending 6 times 🤣
We all need a teammate like the new wife! He better stay with her because she had his BACK!! She said wait a minute, let me talk because he a little nervous, then preceded to destroy the plaintiff and the mom!! She did that. Wow…
Using the child as a pawn is disgusting.
Very much so! no matter what I go through with my child’s dad that’s his dad & I do not have ANYTHING to do with their bond
Why would anyone go to court and sue a decent father when they live with their mother, has an unstable relationship, has a daughter that show signs of abuse, and it’s questionable as to we’re her other kids are?!
She is bold for that!! She need to leave that man alone and straighten up HER LIFE!!!
The wife was like COME ON! She wasn't playing, now they need to get full custody because this is a mess
Once Judge Mathis heard that this man wanted his daughter to attend his wedding the case should’ve been thrown out because at that point it was obvious that the mother didn’t want her daughter at her father‘s wedding.
Typical sour, butt-hurt, “X”!! Won’t let the father see his own kid!! It’s disgusting and happens way too much!! Sorry he don’t want ur sorry ass!
BINGO!!
Exactly, she's jealous as hell. She wants him and knows she can't have him and thats what all the crying is about. She isn't crying about her daughter she crying over him.
Got to have a man syndrome it is common
with y'all women where's the tears for her daughter selfish female about themselves not their own child
💯💯💯
The defendant ol lady is on her A game good lawyer status 😊
I have watched this video over and over. Probably one of my favorite cases. In my opinion, the plaintiff’s mother was part of the reason why she lost the case. I applaud the defendant’s wife stepping in to speak up for her husband. She advocated for her stepdaughter.
I am rewatching now 😊
I agree this is one of my favorites.
She isn't fooling anyone with those crocodile tears
Oh they’re real… she’s embarrassed and hurt bc her life was blasted to the world and the new reminded her of what she lost.
She is a victim too of DV. She really needs help
@@y_e_i8213
Yeah I think it really set into her kid ain't fooling with her
Yeah those tears were real
@@Drenlend 😡
The way the wife was looking at his bm 🤣🤣🤣🤣
His wife has his back!!!
Nope she's Wicked, SPIRITED and abusive..... they lied on there.... She even said they was supposed to bring her home on the 4th......
The wife is WICKED
@@americalove9495 and if you listen they didn’t cause of the burn the mom didn’t know anything about ….
@@americalove9495 the wife is wicked? But the Mom allowed some dusty Male to kick her child?? You are sadly mistaken. Wow. If either of My 4 were afraid to return to an abusive environment, they definitely won't be returning. Just because she birthed her.... doesn't mean that she's a true Mother. I hope that you don't have kids. I'm disgusted.
@@paradisewilliams1133 that’s not what the husband testified to first!!! He mentioned the wedding and the child not wanting to go to camp.
The child has a burn, but they didn’t report it to CPS until weeks later??Conveniently after the wedding.
Yet and still the father has not filed for full custody. Don’t you find that suspicious?
@@Radiance230 Exactly. It’s not up to the stepmother to decide to return someone else’s child to their custody. This is a legal matter. Legally, they did not have any right to make a decision on their own to not return a child to their parent. If they were concerned, they needed to go through the proper legal channels to report them.
😂 the stepmom reminds me of my mom ALWAYS documenting stuff because it comes in handy
At the end, the mother cried the MOST FAKE tears I have ever seen anybody cry, in my life.
IKR!!! She was worst than the fake yt girl tears SMFH!!!
More like a pathetic academy award soap opera performance
I just laughed my head off.
She more embarrassed that the new wife had all them receipts 😂😂
I beat she be abusing that girl as well!!!
wifey said y’all not gonna take my man down without a fight!
Is there a reason he didn’t get full custody if he KNEW their house wasn’t safe?! 🤔
EXACTLY, my thoughts! Why?🤔
@@see5597 it’s not adding up. They all failed that girl
@@tiffanyfowler5165 yes, I agree.
The reason is that wig wearing granny! She is the reason he didn’t full custody. She has someone lying for her.
*get
That stepmother ain’t playing about that baby 🎉you go girl
That lady don’t give a damn about that little girl she just wanna be right you said she never mentioned custody
All this and the dad isn't in court trying to get full custody, instead he's trying to get the grandmother to take on full custody.
Grandma is worse than the mother if you ask me
Thank you, the father isn't any better. He didn't call the authorities about those accusations. Sounds fishy both ways
Look y'all he's trying the best he can. Some people are a little slow in the head. That doesn't mean he should not be respected for what he's trying to do. Lord knows, I'd rather have him in my child's life than what I have...
For all we know, he might.
@@miyamuni the wife would mention it if he was
Nah the wife definitely stepped up 💯 came with paperwork and all 😂 when she asked him “would you like to see it ?” I died 😂😂😂😂
That grandmother is an enabler
Grandma knew they lost 6 mins in
For a parent it's definitely heartbreaking when a child doesn't want to be in the same home as you because they fear for their life. Sad
If your child fears for their life being in your home then you need to ask why.The heartbreak is on on the parent and no child should feel that way.A parent should be a safe space.If my child said this to me and I knew it wasn’t anything to do with me you bet I’d be finding out what was making my child fear for her life and sorting that out
@@emilysjones9746 💯
This is me as a wife!!! Come for my husband and I’ll take you down with EVIDENCE!!!!
Splash!!! The wife showed up like M.J. with the clutch 3🏆
That cry at the end was anger from knowing that all the lies she put together didn’t work in her favor.
🎯
The defendants wife is on the roll!!❤
The judge was livid in this case! As he should be 👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼
I’d be livid as well. That case was terrible
@@anraymcneil6447 ikr smh
He who finds a wife finds a good thing 😅❤ 16:08
I wish everyone believed that . Thank you 🙏
Then why not get custody or want custody of his abused child? 🤔
@@sscorpio5979 I don't understand the question.. he's being accused of kidnapping because he tried to protect his daughter and his wife is speaking up because he obviously has a hard time explaining everything. As a father, your parental rights all but get trampled on if you don't know any better. Bless his wife for having his back and supporting him in this case. Judge Mathis would have went left if his wife didn't intervene when she did. A blessing 🙌🏾
@@anthonystephen6626 again, why didn't he file for temporary custody with all that evidence. His wife is so on point with everything else but not that? Why he want the grandmother to take custody and he will have the child support transferred to her, instead of taking his own child in? My heart goes out to the child.
@@see5597 that wasn’t asked nor discussed…your point is invalid….
When the judge said "did know she was fearful 👀 yeah I know I'm sorry you wasn't around" 😂 I love judge Mathis he's real and funny at the same time
No one wins in this battle. The children needs good parents is on both sides
Not this kind of parent
The boyfriend probably burned the baby like he burned the mom per that police report.
😂😂😂What show did you watch?? The mother just said the child went over to dads with the burn mark. The grandma said they were boiling eggs. So how did he burn her?
@@yasheialawrence1184 girl that doesn’t mean it was true😭you’re gullible asf
@@yasheialawrence1184 the BOYFRIEND not the DAD!!!!
The defendant’s wife is the whole truth! He won and they are miserable.
The sad part as Judge Mathis asked the mother about the burn and even til that day in court she did not know what happened. This should’ve been burned in her memory after having this brought up by DHS. The grandmother is helping but unfortunately it’s hard to be stuck in the middle of their drama. Her loyalty is to her daughter, but it should be to her granddaughters wellbeing. I never heard where the daughter is now but pray she is safe and happy. All our children come into this world needing is love, food , shelter, . safe from harm .
He missed the new wife saying on July 4th when we were supposed to bring her home… AFTER HE SAID we weren’t supposed to bring her home until the 15th. Pay attention!!!!!
I caught that they were all lying
Yes... I caught that...the fact that they lied, and dug up the mother pass, says alot about him and his wife.... The wife laughed at the end was really sick and wicked ..., Says alot about her....
I think the baby momma needs to get it together for her kids’ sake. I don’t think the baby momma want her baby daddy, like the wife said. She clearly has multiple baby daddies and in fact that is probably her biggest problem.
I wouldn't take her home either! Did ya'll missed the part about the mom not being I'm the girl's life, the child lived with grandma not the woman who gave birth to her, those people knew how the burn happened on her face, grandma lied about it and mom didn't give a damn thats why she couldn't tell what happened to the child, not every woman that give birth is a good mother who is involved and it's damn crazy how ya'll completely missed the crazy abusive boyfriend that lives in the home with the child for however often momma gets to see her.
@@dawnmatthews6424 then why isn’t the father fighting for full custody??
What a turnaround. It seemed like a usual overzealous parent in a custody dispute, then the step-mom started showing the evidence. She is a real mom!
I wish I had a stepmom like this growing up. Children dont get heard alot. Someone to protect them is golden. Her father may have saved her from a lifetime of trauma. Hats off to u King❤
The look of guilt on both of their faces when asked about the burn at 8:34 … They’re so obviously lying.
So the mama knew the father was going to call CPS on her; so in a desperate attempt to avoid consequences she calls the police & says that this man kidnapped his child…..🤦🏾♀️ pathetic & disgusting
I bust out laughing when the wife told ol girl’s mama “don’t come over here… this ain’t what you want!” 😂😂😂😂…. I believe the man & stepmom about them abusing his daughter how you don’t know how she got a burn on her face? The grandmother come w/ some lame ass story she was boiling eggs… I hope the dad gets full custody…. Cuz that mama & grandma look crazy
Lmfao boiling the eggs had me weak . So fake
None of them can give a straight answer to anything asked.. Geez
Not true
Yes they clearly used this child and legal system as a means of warring with each other.
They for that child and had no intentions of returning until AFTER the wedding. That was the plan all along. That’s why they were inconsistent with the dates and specifics of the timeline.
Yes the mother probably was jealous of the wedding. But you can’t go days without communication while having possession of the child. So she rightfully went to the police for assistance.
They noticed the burn, but didn’t file until weeks later. And yet, they still haven’t filed for full custody. Yeah.
The wife laughing at the end is all I needed to know.
Using the legal system in a way that reveals their true colors! hopefully babygirl gets to be with her father
Did her father ask for full custody? No!
If the home is so unsafe why didn’t he fight for full custody???
@@Radiance230hopefully his wife can take care of the child Melissa. A very sad situation and I sincerely hope this child finds a happy home and gets therapy asap.
🥴🥴🥴🤷🏾♀️🤣🤣🤣🤣 the end got me done I'm cracking up
This is one of the most serious cases... wow
Geesh, I hope they didn’t hurt this kid. Geesh, what is wrong with people. Why hurt a child.
poor parenting…the mother is not a good mother at all!
thank you ☺️
This one was serious. That poor child! I hope the child is kept out of harms way…..
same here😊
Her mother is a narcissist and controls her daughter
This ain’t what cha want granny! 😂😂😂
I had to laugh at that part but this whole situation is messed up
Man, what a mess! I feel sorry for the child.
I know right I’m so sad grown folk can’t get along
The momma needs to stop covering for her daughter she's grown protect the grandchild
It’s sickening when a child is used and abused as a pawn between two warring parents.
This is the comment!
BOTH parents used the child and legal system. It’s sad.
The grandma about that life🤣🥴. She was probably about to get beat down too,but still ready🤦🏿♀️😭
This is one of my favorite cases because his wife came and cleared.
The defendants woman closing statement! “ Judge Mathis, whenever ya need us to come back we will” 😂 I love it!!! Glad this went the other way for the plaintiff, and hope that child is l t with her after this!!
I literally lol at that! 🤣
That had me rolling. Especially after they cut to the plaintiff crying. 😂
I need an update.
Calling who?! 😂
I thought this was going to go an entirely differently way in the beginning. Wow. Good on the new wife and the child's father advocating and being diligent for this little girl. Bravo.
"You just want my husband...thats all that is you just want my husband"🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
"Boiling eggs" 😄😄😄😄😄😄😄😄😄😄. I swear I watch parts of this episode a few times a week.
LAWD! That was aloT.🤯
Just too much 😞
He has a good wife and seems she honestly cares about his daughter. The actions of the grandmother at the end went from church ready to street ready in 1, 2, 3 seconds.
Whew judge Mathis do not play about them babies 💯👌🏿
I’m glad they talked about the alleged kidnapping and suing for defamation. Normally the intro and what the case is about never goes hand in hand.
Normally they be like “He was accused of kidnapping his own daughter with his new wife, he’s suing for a collector’s toy that has been passed down from generations”. 🤣🤣🤣
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
The wife said hold my purse she handled her ass
This chick dont even take care of the child...and the fact the Mother don't know how that baby got burnt was very concerning to me she was covering for that no good BF of hers who is abusing her and her child smh .so sad her Mom is covering for the dead beat Mother...Dad continue to pay close attention to your child and listen to her if she tells you something is happening to her you damn right go get your damn baby!. First protector her Daddy..don't ever let her down!..Good job Dad & wife!
Plaintiff keep saying "my child, my child, my child". Ma'am you didn't make the child by yourself.
I like how these women never refer to a child as belonging to both it's always her child
Wife came through clutch! That’s what we do.
The whole fact that the Mother didn't know how her child got burnt is the main reason she lost! Homegirl got some issues. She don't take care of those kids her Mother do and has been. I'm surprise JM didn't ask her was she a crack head! Lol
This is so SAD as a Mother you need to know what your children are going thru and also allowing your partner abuse them is another level of ignorance and stupidity. I feel for this little girl, Hope the Father fight for full custody. I feel the grandmother has too much in her plate to watch over all her grandchildren, and the mother is in another freaking planet..
You know what is amazing about this case tho?
The way JUDGE MATHIS listened to BOTH of their testimonies and was able to analyze it in REAL TIME and get the truth out of it ON THE SPOT!
To me this is one of JUDGE MATHIS’ greatest cases!! He put on a CLINIC of amazing intellectual skills here!!💯🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥
You can tell that tommy was nervous and he is a good daddy and good people because I know all of his family his family and my family basically grew up together