First, you’re so pretty by the way, like hello? But that aside. I’m so glad to hear that you’ve worked on yourself and getting out of your comfort zone. That’s the main thing to do when you’re lonely, nobody should let loneliness stop them from just moving forward with life. It’s really not easy and thank you so much for your honesty. I just want to put a little bit of my own story out there too to just help those lonely in school. It was so bad for me that I literally had to sneak to go sit in teachers classrooms during lunch, while they had a class going on just because I was so scared of being alone in lunch and this was early senior year. Towards the later end I got out of my comfort zone and honestly just started talking to people, random classmates, people I thought looked cool, or just asking kids in class if I could sit with them at lunch. Granted it literally never worked out besides 1 person out of me asking like 70 people…. But it at least worked out one time. It’s hard and lonely and socializing is a scary journey but you’ve got to start! But like Sia said, might not have had crazy success now but I’m sure the more people I talk to and the more I put myself out there, one day I’ll find that friend or hopefully boyfriend that’ll want to hold a conversation with me, just got to give it time and keep trying. Wishing y’all the best. ❤️
As someone who was a loner I CANT STAND those “Ugh I wish I was a mysterious and cool loner” it’s always the extroverts that say that and I hate sm like no u dont
EXACTLY. like some girl i thought she was my friend told me "i like the old you better" (the old me was me being left out and alone) and she told me that she wishes she was a loner
Did you attend the graduation? I don’t care honestly if I have no friends in highschool since it’s kind of late and everybody has their own group so it’s hard inserting myself into it. But I do want people talk to and take pictures with after the ceremony so my family doesn’t think I’ve been a loner
Same but worse for me cause people talk to me once every 3 days and it’s about school work or borrowing a charger or pen, and freaking glad highschools over for me 😭
@@hallooos7585 yea it’s always about asking me for stuff like homework, laptop chargers, erasers, etc. Never about me or my day. Sometimes I’d try and talk to them but the convo dies out quick
As someone who’s bad at making friends, I agree that assigned seats and teacher chosen groups are the holy grail to make friends :3 Edit: not to be that person BUT DAMN- Ty guys sm! ^^
i knowww! this year my teacher did that for my class but it kinda backfired cause the kid she sat next to me didn't want to sit in the first desk and wanted to go with his friends, he was a bit rude at first but he has gotten a bit better day by day.
Are you guys just shy is all? How come you aren't able to make new friends? I'm genuinely asking, like do you try to make friends but there is no connection, or do you just not talk to anybody?
@@ArianeM-gk2vp I sometimes try, it's just that I live in a small town and go to a small high school and have a lot of drama going on right now so it's a bit hard but I try
@@ArianeM-gk2vp Hi! The reason why most of use can’t make friends is because of something call social anxiety or just being a introvert :3 it just makes it so it’s hard to communicate to others :) because we’re scared of making a bad impression of someone, hope that helps!!
The growth I’ve been getting this month is so crazy and I just want to thank you all for the comments and support. It feels so good to know I’ve been able to be a voice of relatability when it comes to school :)))
Yeah, yt for some reason has been recommending me more small ytbers. This isn't a bad thing at all, cause I like supporting small ytbers, hope you have success in your senior year and youtube. There's 1,000 people rooting for you 👍
I went through high school alone. And university is shaping to be the same. My problem has never been that I don't talk to people, its that the interactions never leave whatever container they start in. Whether that be a classroom, a school club, or a random conversation. We know each other for the allotted time and then never after that. I'm already a junior in college, not that that doesn't mean I can't make friends, but I want to emphasize that I have tried. I feel like loneliness has shaped my view of the world. Life isn't about living, its about the fight for survival. Surviving school, surviving work, surviving life stresses. Friends are a distraction from the unending battle to stay alive, and it becomes clear once you've been alone for long enough. I should also mention that the whole, "fight for survival" thing doesn't mean you can be mean, rude, or push others around. The opposite, really. We all must fight to live, so we all have an obligation to help each other keep going. Sorry for the life philosophy dump, its just how I've felt.
Have you ever tried getting their numbers and doing an activity after that situation? It could be something as small as playing a game together, or just talking about an assignment. Ive done this and its snowballed into me getting to know the person better.
If you’re tired of shallow conversations, be a little bit unhinged, it can be as simple as sticking out your tongue to them in the hallway (or if you think they’ll find it rude just say hi lol) do as I say not as I do bc I only have 1 friend and this is what I did
i've been locked in a cycle of making friends in my classes but never end up talking to them outside of school so when the school year ends and I don't have any classes with them next year, I just completely stop talking to them. and that's been going on for two years now. its so weird to make so many friends that I can laugh and talk to just for it to completely disappear because they're all more comfortable with sticking to their already existing friend groups than making new long lasting friendships
Kind of irritates me how people never want to step out of their comfort zone, but you're not in charge of convincing someone you're "worthy" to change for
Having small talk with random people is like planting seeds for them the next time they meet you, like a _"person will remember that"_ type of interaction. That makes future conversations more comfortable to strike up
I’m so glad that your’ve taken a different approach, and are slowly finding success. The goal isn’t to be the popular kid, but to speak up and simply find a clique of like minded individuals. I had to do that, and now I’ve built a competent group of connections. Good luck to you and the rest of the lonelys out there.
goat bro omg youre videos actually are my saving grace. God bless you and your family and if you have pets i pray for your pets and thank you for youre videos its nice to see someone thats not in their 20s talk about having no friends
Sophmore me had a mindset of "real friends start at college im built different" or something but i really stepped out of my comfort zone and tried to find my people that same year, I am currently a senior, and Im rlly glad for the past me for showing that effort, now I cant spend a day without talking w them, i hope everyone finds their crowd too one day.
@ girl I typed a long ahh paragraph, then realized everything I said sounds like a sob story when simply my sentences could shorten to “I was so lonely that I was desperate to change my habits.” I realized this was becoming a problem when my reasoning to not want to go to school wasn’t lessons or wasn’t the teachers or the awful food, but it was simply being in a room with more than 2 people. I was so insecure about being lonely at school to a point my reality would be constantly reminded to me by myself even when i was outside of school. Id say I definitely had awkward moments while trying to push myself to compliment people, or act like im interested in whatever they’re doing so they’re kind enough to continue the small talk. Some people were interested to talk to me, some felt uncomfortable because of my enthusiasm. I didn’t bother those type of people, I didn’t take it personal and moved on. Some people definitely called me weird because I was so quiet at my freshman year while suddenly being so talkative at sophomore. Those comments really hurt, they made me feel like what I was doing was wrong. Some people realized my attempt was desperate, and some simply didn’t care, being acquaintances couldn’t hurt. I would also make people ask questions abt myself by answering the classic “how was your evening” or “did you the homework” or “what do you think abt miss x” questions long and detailed answers instead of a “good”. A “good.” doesn’t really open any doors, or more like, being nonchalant didn’t open any doors for me. The first month felt like I wasn’t being myself, that I was faking all of it and everybody could tell or everybody gaf, but simply no one cares or no one cares enough to think abt it for more than 2 second, if they do, they are the weird one like lmfaoo why are u obsessed w me. I also fed myself a reasonable amount of delusions such as, “one day I wont be so socially awkward, will get used to the process of waiting people or giving them a chance to open up to me easily.” And thats kinda correct. I can talk to strangers or have small talk easier now, my attempt isn’t always befriending them, but Im not so shy or even when I blabber my words, Im able to joke about it to kinda give the person speaking to me that Im human, I make mistakes and how okay it is. So simply my method came purely from desperation, and I hope you find a way that works best for you when socializing, instead of being a depressed like me lmao
i stopped going to school because i was so afraid of my school. i went to a small, private school but even there i was so painfully socially anxious, so moving to this massive big new school was so hard for me and it destroyed my mental health to like a life threatening degree so i just stopped going and i havent gone to school for the whole year. the thing is i like learning and i miss classes, i liked talking to teachers, i liked reading books and doing assignments but recess was hell. walking onto the school campus was hell. walking into any building was hell. walking anywhere was hell. leaving my room was hell. sitting anywhere near anyone was hell. i did kind of want friends but i was so used to just being made fun of and teased and talked behind the back of all my life that i was better off alone. i hated being alone but its better than having to surround myself with people that will just hurt me more. i still just wanted a friend but it was just impossible. im not funny. im not smart. i have nothing to talk about and im not interesting. im not nice. im always tired. i dont blame others for not wanting to talk to me. but the problem is that sometimes in school you are in situations where you LITERALLY HAVE TO TALK TO PEOPLE TO GET BY and i just couldnt i just never could ever. i make everything awkward. and im fine with not having to talk to people because im used to it. i just hate having to be around people and talk to people that i have no idea how to be okay around.
I just watched your video like right before this one. it's actually so crazy that I clicked onto your profile and there was an update! You seem like such a cool person and I really liked your papa's bakeria game play from the og video!
I’m glad you made this video. First day, I didn’t go, I cried in bed, I couldn’t deal with it. The next day, I did go, and it wasn’t as bad as I expected. The people in my class aren’t really my kind of people but they aren’t assholes, so it’s ight, but they still aren’t friends, just classmates, its just hard
glad to see you stepping out of your comfort zone and having acquaintances!!! i also hated answering in class but more recently ive been answering way more because im a nerd lmao for me i pushed myself from barely maintaining eye contact out of shyness to actually holding long conversations with 2 friends at school 🎊 (it took uhhhh 5 years + moving schools but hey its progress!!!!) felt like two b*tches in a same pod fr tho 😭😭 honestly im really glad i have at least one friend, is it too much to ask for a someone to get feral over the fandoms im in tho 😔(yes it is...) hope senior year goes well for all of us here!!!
As someone who has friends but finds it very difficult to make new friends in particular environments, I can say I understand. It's different from school, but I've been in this same team sport club for just about 8 years now with new teams and people every year, and throughout the whole thing I have not once made a friend. It's one of those things where you try to start with small talk: "how was your day?" and then they reply with "good" and end the conversation or leave you to talk to someone else. Especially since it's such a close environment in your team and there's no where to hide when you're all alone. It sucks so bad and I've had my fair share of tears when I come home from a training session feeling useless and isolated, but I love the sport so who cares. I'm debating just switching clubs to try and find a better spread of people, but next year I'm going to college and hopefully I can just join the clubs there and take my shot.
This is extremely relatable. I’m a senior now and i haven’t had a friend thought the entirety of school. in elementary school i had a few acquaintances lmao. the best part is that im an extremely uninteresting person with zero interests or skills so even if i do try talking to people i’d have nothing to talk about lma anxiety peaked 2 years ago though it’s slightly better now (i don’t feel like jumping off a cliff when entering school but it’s still lonely and not fun at all)
I don’t got many friends too and I’m a sophomore in hs your video is very relatable and I get nervous talking to people because I don’t want them to laugh at me
honestly this might sound weird but the best advice i’ve ever gotten is to go talk to the gay kids. i was super lonely and had no friends for months until i talked to this one trans guy i sat next to in science class and now he’s one of my best friends. most know what it’s like to be lonely/bullied/etc and are much more accepting than the average person, plus in my experience much funnier and more genuine and kinder
girl i literally love u we are and were in the exact same situation it gets better after high school, too and I graduated only this year Im in college now and with the help of that and working in a place with other teens, my social skills have been improving so much. I think its just us getting older and realizing that the things we worried about then were just overthinking and focusing too much on how we look to others. (well thats how it was for me mostly lawl) Happy for you!!!
I relate to this so hard. I’m a senior this year as well. I was incredibly lonely from my eighth grade year to my sophomore year. I changed schools my junior year bcs I couldn’t bear it any longer. I made friends quickly bcs I did cross country which helped me get a headstart bcs a team like that is kinda built in friends. I used to have such bad anxiety about school but having that year in a new environment helped me grow. We have different circumstances, but one thing that helped me a lot is just starting random conversations. Most people will not think you’re weird for talking to them! I wish you the best in making friends!
im also in my senior year of highschool with no friends, im still kinda scared to speak up in class but after seeing this video ur right, this is my last year who cares if my wrong or whatever, life goes on
Omg!! Got so excited when I got this notification. It’s so cool to see ur face u seem mad cool!! And yeah the fuck it we ball thing with senior year is so real I’ve been cooling this year.
im 16 and Tmr is going to be my first day of class in college. I have made some "friends" during orientation but they are not in the same class as me. I hope i will be able some friends😭😭. During highschool i really struggled to make friends and all my remaining friends left me. It will be hard because many people in my college came together as a group and i dont think they are keen on making new friends
I really liked this video, came out so real and realistic. I also experienced/ is experiencing loneliness, I use to be in a trio last year and 1 of us got separated into another class, me and my friend with be grew apart as she found new friends in our new class while my other friend grew apart in his new class leaving me by myself a lot but I’m doing fine I guess, I casually communicate with others in my class and I’ve been connecting with more people. I guess I realised how dependent and vulnerable I was outside my comfort zone with friends but now I learnt more about myself and really looked into myself more.
Heh I've been going to school without friends since sixth grade (12th grade now) with crippling anxiety and bouts of depression, and since I was bullied in middle school, I blamed it on the people around me. I changed schools twice, then COVID happened and I was totally comfortable attending class in an online setting, but it took me till 11th grade to realise that most of the people around me were normal, kind people and that I was the problem (or at least, the outlier). Got diagnosed with ASD recently, which explains my abnormal behaviours people don't seem to like. But I'm still emotionally and socially crippled. My close friends don't have any classes with me (one of them is in a different school), and my psychiatrist accidentally spilled to me I might be schizoid (i.e., having schizoid personality disorder), but where I live, they couldn't formally test me for it until I'm 18. Having that condition isn't something separated from the general public, even though it's rarely diagnosed. Zoids are found in plain sight, it could explain a lot about the social and emotional tendencies of so many people, so who's to say that many of us people's situation might actually be a trauma response? Now, I'm not implying that all lonely teenagers have a personality disorder, but I'm in a situation where I crave for human connection, but can't form relationships with people I constantly have to be around, such as my classmates. I also get along considerably better with little kids (friends of sister or sister of a friend) and teachers in my school than anyone in my age group, possibly because of the distance, but I'm forced to be around people my age all day, and it's suffocating. Sorry for this long rant, but if you made it this far, I appreciate you reading this!
It’s comforting to know that we are going through the same struggles. I am still trying to learn how to overcome my anxiety and overthinking by watching how other people interact with each other. It’s just so hard to come out of my comfort zone and just talk but I really want to get better. Also best of luck to you and congrats on improving ❤
Im also in my senior year, super outgoing and friendly, i love making jokes and caring about people. I still have only 1 real friend and shes been dealing with a lot of hard stuff, so it really feels like i dont have anybody right now :( I have decent "friends" at school but they would never open up to me and so i dont to them
I had extreme social anxiety all through ought middle school and high school until I graduated. If we went to the same school I would have befriend you fr
I just started my freshman year of highschool and I just saw ur highschool video from a year ago and I’m going through the same thing lol, except I don’t really care if i have friends or not. I just live my life and if i get friends i get friends and if i don’t i don’t
See, that's how I feel. Sometimes I wish I could share something I find interesting with someone, but most of the time I quite simply do not care - I don't even feel lonely. Hopefully college/uni will be fun, because generally the people you see the most there are taking the same class/interested in the same things as you.
Girllll!!! I LOVE your braids! And also i am really lonely and i love horror movies too😍 i am just starting my sophomore year, i am really, really lonely and i thought i was alone in this, but no. It’s a good to hear that people like me exist:) you truly gave me hope, and also you seem really nice, and i’d like to get to know you better sooo yeah.. if you see this comment thank you for your support:) ( and also i grew up watching films on cd’s so i don’t think the brainrot is affecting me lol😂)
I was just watching the original vid, and legit thought "hmm, I wonder if anything has changed in the past year", perfect timing ig haha kudos to you!! 👍
Being in a small school like I am is simultaneously good and bad. On the good side, every year things get much more familiar (so long as I let them). On the bad side, it's hard to change my way of things when everyone already knows me as something I don't want to be.
i moved across the country so like, i have friends but i dont have any at high school and its really hard bc the friends i do have i cant really see so yeah also i dont feel like i click w anyone at my school,, like its kinda hard for me to want to be myself at my school so um ye 👍
your point about bonding over similar interests during small talk rings true! I was friends with someone for nine years because when we were eight we bonded over animal jam and my little pony. Things just happen to spark between people because of the littlest things, so let go of having a rigid, pessimistic mindset and go with the flow when talking with people. Youll find your people eventually. Great video! c:
Same. I do talk to two people but the only time I actually get to Interact with them is during lunchtime, or I somehow bump into them in the hallways. Overall it suck honestly.😔
@@notbutters lucky you. I litterally have no one to talk to at ALL. Scary thing is that the one kid that sits alone in school movies is more realistic. 🥲
@@gamer.kingz1033 look I’m not the best at advice or recommendations, and it might or might not help, but idk when your school started but it’s September, one of my friends said I should (possibly) join a club or try something where people have the same interests as me, so maybe you could try that. (I have no idea I’m sorry I don’t want anything to be taken the wrong way rn. I haven’t even joined a club but I’m considering it)
Honestly i have been watching A LOT of these videos about steeping out of your comfort zone and living your life to the fullest and I couldn't exactly picture myself doing anything that the person in the video suggested but the way you speak about your experience, it's so relatable and it actually gives me ideas of how I can talk more to people in school, thank you so much for like an actually good advice that genuinely works for me
As someone whos starting 10th grade it's so hard to find people who are willing to be friends with me that are not the "class clown kids" which seems to be most highschoolers now in days. I still talk to my middle school friends, but it hasn't been the same sence I left the state to a new one. I've tried talking to people but no one wants to talk to me because I'm the "Smart kid" Like ITS NOT MY FAULT IM SMART, so usally kids would just turn around and basically talk sh** about me when I'm not even 2 feet away from them. I'm also starting to realize that I was bullied during my freshman year by most people in my grade because of the many experiences I had and a example would be that one time a girl literally threw her bag across the room and it managed to hit me and she proceeded to act like it wasn't on purpose. I'm currently "Friends" with a juinor but these past few days she hasn't talked to me after she switched classes so now I'm completely alone at school with no one to talk to. Being alone really makes me wish that I was still with my middle school friends (which I would of have been with if I didn't leave the state) we talk every week or so but we've been talking less or less and we haven't talked in a month. Lastly really praying that I can find a friend this year, at least one would be fine I just need somebody :( Also my grammar sucks so sorry yall😅
People will always isolate those more mature than them, simply because it makes them jealous. High school doesn’t have to be the only place you find friends. Think of your interests. Could you find a club with them in your area? Or if not, have you ever tried a socialization group? I know it sounds weird, but trust me the people there are actually willing to have decent conversations and not be jerks about it.
literally a few minutes ago I saw your original video- I relate to it a bunch and I am also in my senior year right now! Despite just discovering your channel it’s so awesome to see your growth and you taking steps to make small conversations with others. It definitely opened my mind a bit for myself, and going to try and take that into consideration. You’re really funny and well spoken with these videos Between those 4 years there was small attempts to try and talk to people and engage in conversations that I was familiar with (especially in 9th). I remember the first highschool friend I made during 9th grade during gym class, she had someone who was closer but over time i had started to get uncomfortable when they had started to become majorly clingy- 10th grade was a really forgettable year for me but also around the time when my mental health was absolutely awful. I despised going to school every single day and had alot of bottled up anger about two of my classes that I was taking at the time. By 11th I feel like people know meee? But it’s just a simple hi in the hallway or whatever, acquaintances. I have somebody who I talk on and off too but both of us don’t have alot to talk about, nor alot in common sadly 😭 But despite it all,, I kinda like being alone in school? Maybe im so used to it it doesn’t bother me when im ACTUALLY there, I don’t mind eating alone doing my own thing, I have alot of online friends who have more similar interests and I feel more comfortable around.. even if not in person. I always look around my classmates thinking who I *MAY* be friends with but never actually attempt. Seeing them interact with others I feel like I could tell the vibe they bring off,, but one day I should try to make more small interaction.
i literally just watched your old video yesterday and just found out you made a follow up to the vid lol, its good to know youre doing well. also get better with your sickness!
Tw: vent(?) I got a new start in highschool i was kinda the new kid, I felt like my depression and suicidal thoughts would end there because I was starting fresh, but no I screwed up so many opportunities to make new friends because I can't be a normal person. (Eye contact, small talk, etc) After a year of highschool (sophomore now) I see this new girl in school and I really wanted to be her friend just couldn't bring myself to talk. (Couple days later she has a whole friend group. Why can't I be likes that? I want ro be able to talk with people without me trying to gasp for air, fidgeting and Looking them in the eyes, getting stuck in words.) my mom says I should have at least 1 friend to riley on, but I screwed up my last friendship. (Sometimes I wish I could go back in time and face my friend, and maybe tell her she was the only one I truly had.) I'm not smart, I don't have any real talent, and I dont even have friends. (Sometimes I just think of ending it. I'm just to scared to die.)
i genuinely can't believe that you're alone in school.. I am too but you have such a fun, outgoing bubbly personality and you're so funny! it's crazy to me that if i saw you at my school i'd instantly try to talk to you lol
I had no friends for most of high school. I even used to shake during school presentations hahaha. This video hit me with a wave of crazy memories. You’re on the right track, keep going! Things do get better
I have this thing where certain people gravitates towards me and wanting to be a friend during the start of the year. It always makes me feel awkward interacting people that I don't know. But I found this one person in our class who was extremely quiet and doesn't interact with anyone. I knew that the people that wanted to be friends with me have genuine intentions. As a way, I gravitated them towards that friend group which they got along really well. Though I don't consider myself as a part of that friend group. It's just a thought of me not wanting someone to get left out from the crowd. I'm already content being alone as it makes me feel more at peace. Its like friendship is a relation that is completely foreign for me.
i went through the same issues in highschool, and I graduated in 2021 without any friends as well. I’m in community college now and I’ve made one friend out of all the years, but, I’ve been suspecting I have ASD due to failure to make friends and social cues and the symptoms are very apparent to me. I am also a black woman so I relate a ton to you. I agree on stepping out your comfort zone and talking first because the other person might be afraid to talk as well. I still have a very difficult time finding friends but I am glad to be out of highschool and getting treatment for my ASD symptoms. finding neurodivergent friends has been helping me tremendously, and I have lots of online friends who are neurodivergent so I guess attracting people with the same brain level as u. It gets better though ❤️
i love how you reflected on what thoughts get you going in the morning and how knowing you'll regret one thing more is so powerful because I resonated so much with my brain making things worse all the time
I dont wanna be that mood killer but i really do wish you luck for college because for me personally college is pretty lonely. But i do hope you can make some friends next year!
I graduated highschool years ago and this video touched my heart🥲 also I admire even if you still have any 'real friends' in school your gonna keep trying- a mindset that I rly wanna learn from you The funny thing is that when in senior year, not so long before winter break/last month of the school, I actually got to "talk" to some people I've never expected to. And even tho that talk didn't grow in to a friendship I sometimes imagine that it might turn into one if I opened up more and not be all so shy back then. I whole heartedly believe similar things will happen to you and since you are going out of your comfort zone, I'm sure you'll not miss the chance! Rooting for you sia🤗💛
Ive went through similar things at school left highschool with 0 friends I must report Ive made great group of friends at uni now !!!!! been friends with them for about 2-3 years as Im a 3rd year its great. you can talk to them they talk to you listen to each other very nice sometimes even oraganise activities out with uni very fun and motivate eo to study. I felt in highschool everyone was the same person lowkey no one that matched my vibes for friends but in uni for diverse better (I dont want to jinx so far so good. It does get better!!!! Like so many of the girls in HS be low key bullying by excluding and ignoring me from everything and the guys were any better but I still started to sit with one group so I can at least listen to them not sit by myself I would talk to them they would be giving me blanks stares like wtf you trying to say lol it was very awkward at time I wanted to cry jump out the window and with the same people constantly so no one to talk to very isolating finishing the without having talked. Kinda good pandemic hit so I didnt have to see people/I can regather myself end of 2019 was big low. Then after last 2 years of HS I gained confidence I didnt really care about what others thought really as much, continued to talk to people where possible. But what also really helped me is making online friends cause gives you people to talk to vent/rant frustrations and just talk about silly things you cant meet them they live v far away other countries and continents but helps to know in the world someone actually gives a sht about you lol. When its your birthday they give you nice bday wishes too so love that. So many different people of different ages irl I could never be friends with so many people and its been going for years now. Otherwise I just dealt with everything myself so someone irl or online is better than no one in my opinion. But goodluck I hope you find better people in uni!!!!
i heard someone said that if are trying or looking for something hard enough it well not come to you, you have to stop looking for it, you have to stop craving it, be yourself and work on yourself and it well come when it comes
As a senior in HS, I can comfirm this 100%. People just dont wanna talk to me whenever I socialize. Its like they’re ignoring me on purpose. At this point I feel like I am a ghost to society, a curse.
your very smart and self aware. Even though i dont have that much social anxiety, but i have overall life anxiety. Your helping alot of ppl. Keep spitting Siaa
this is so true! me and this girl in middle school bonded over similar senses of humor and we’re still friends up to this day (4 yrs now), i moved so we don’t go to the same school but we still hangout which is good for me mentally since I don’t have friends in school :)
So I’m not sure if having a hard time making friends is related to autism, but it definitely is for me. If you notice a lot of other peoples conversations they are quite shallow. You don’t have to be friends with everyone, but you can find other people with similar interests like what you’ve been doing. Seems like there is a certain disconnect when kids reach high school age. It’s either some become mature, or some double down on asinine behavior from middle school.
I just became Freshman, and it’s tuff I guess? Im mostly just there like I’m called nonchalant or dead, because that’s literally just me, I’m like a dying corpse, barely showing emotion just moving around, not even reacting to anything, just a cycle, but anyways it’s just October, literally just 2 months, it’s inevitable right?? Oh well guess I’ll find out because damn High School it ain’t guaranteed who your friend is because everyone but me is friends with each other. Oh well🤷♂️
ayyyy im proud of you sia i lwk just watched your old video like 5 minutes ago then immediately saw this video one thing thats helped me alot tho in gaining social skills was getting a job since most cashiers try to be friends with you, and as embarrasing as it sounds i literally studied the people around me trying to figure out why they were so good, and the answer is that they were weird and were open about being weird. And honestly that makes a ton of sense to me, because everybody is secretly weird or brainrotted, and if you are just confidently weird then it makes people more likely to open up to you.
watching ur vids is like being on ft w a friend + the mr. peanutbutter reference u so valid 4 dat 🗣️ im glad uve made such progress i hope u can continue to make friends
Honestly having the same questions and experiences myself, im glad to have heard this perspective from someone else. It really helps put into perspective what’s wrong with my own, so thanks 🤞
I just watched the first video before this one, and i kinda just want to say that these videos really helped me w my mindset. im a freshman in hs--at a completely new school--and its been HARDDD trying 2 talk to people. i still have my friends from my old school, and ive met two juniors at my new school, but things have still been getting lonely and its still difficult. im thankful that the people ive met decided to ignore my awkward shi and actually get to know me, n im blessed to have a mom who is forcing me to go to football games n such.. though its still a lil soul-crushing that no one my age is willing to be good acquaintances rather than: "oh yeaahh were friends ahaha" n allat fake stuff. something that helped me make friends was, like you said, just little things here and there to the person you sit next to. im HEAVILY introverted so while its hard to talk, i like to listen a lot : )! i also made strong connections to most (if not all) of my teachers. my mom would tell me that when the time came for a seating chart, that you could always talk to them about how its a struggle to interact w a group thats alr close. and if you dont tell them that directly, theyll most likely figure it out by how you interact.. or lack thereof.. with the folks around you. im typing this comment suuper late at night so my fault if it makes no sense (and ermm this is my 1st ever youtube comment) but i js wanna share one last thing i pinky promise; something my mom has always told me is that you always wanna have your back first (at least in early stages of friendships). cus if YOU dont respect yourself, if YOU dont treat yourself with kindness, if YOU wont speak up for yourself, what makes you think someone else will do all of that. and if you dog on yourself and say that youll never make friends, that is a 1000% guarantee that you will not make friends. give yourself grace, give yourself mercy. let yourself get embarrassed and awkward. if it helps, even an ounce, let it. ive had SO many embarrassing moments in my life and theyve all helped with who i am today. it took me a while to learn to not immediately shut down when i didnt look "cool" while doing something, but i promise that learning to just let it be has let my personality open up so much. anyway.. its like 3 am and i dont even know if im making sense to anyone but myself anymore.. keep on being you and dont let NOBODY change that 💙
omggg I'm also graduating as well! I guess sort of... if I will ever be able to 😭. But anyways, about talking to people... I do have no problems with that. Sometimes I do get nervous when I was expecting something from them... it's just a simple conversation after all. And I have also come to realize that I'm basically unapproachable, yet I'm still going to make the first move THIS YEAR. So I will be using the motivation and helpful advice from your video now on! 😁
woah, glad to know youre at least doing a little bit better! i literally just watched the first video like a week ago, so it's nice to see that things are going somewhat better. thanks for the advice!
I just saw that video, I may have no friends in school, and it sucks. My class is nice, but I don't get along with them because the interests differ. Now that is not bad, I adore my few friends, and I just draw during the breaks. I also made an acquaintance in class instead of a friend. She's similar to my type of personality, and I have this year and the next school year left. I'm comfortable, I improve my talking skills, and I walk up to strangers to tell them how cool their clothes or hairstyles look and oh my.. it works! Simple interactions help so much.
omg i clicked on your first vid like 2 weeks ago and i was wondering if there had been any updates since a year passed and today youtube recommended me this video WHATTT THATS CRAZY but anyway so glad to hear youve been stepping out of your comfort zone and have atleast one person to rely on! you seem like a super genuine and cool person and i hope everything works just the way you want it to💗💗
omg im also finally in my senior year!! im very extroverted but had no friends since sophomore year even after ive tried to socialize with people to the point of burnout and exhaustion, i still, although rarely now, struggle with not having friends and it led me to your video hopefully u post more so we can grow together!! i am also a bitch in the horror movie pod btw, lov ya u gorjas girl
Regarding your idea on being your true self, I think most of the anxiety surrounding that often stems from the fact that we feel pressured to act a certain way that is "us," when in reality a lot of people have more than one side to them and act differently around different people not necessarily because theyre being fake, but because they have a side that clicks more with that person. Personally I feel like i used to struggle with the idea of not being able to act uniformly around people before, but the second i shifted my perspective away from having to act the same around everyone so that i was "my true self" i was able to bring out a lot more of my character towards other people. For example, despite making this yappanese of a comment right now lol under another circumstance i can be a lot more brainrot But yeah, congratulations on making friends, being able to put yourself out there can indeed be really difficult at first :')
If you feel online is truly for you and makes you feel more comfortable then you should choose it. The only downside is the social aspect. Yet, if you go in person and you’re going back to the school that you got bullied at, and your school hasn’t done anything about it maybe try transferring? In the end I can’t really give any advice regarding that because the biggest decision maker is yourself
First, you’re so pretty by the way, like hello? But that aside.
I’m so glad to hear that you’ve worked on yourself and getting out of your comfort zone. That’s the main thing to do when you’re lonely, nobody should let loneliness stop them from just moving forward with life. It’s really not easy and thank you so much for your honesty. I just want to put a little bit of my own story out there too to just help those lonely in school. It was so bad for me that I literally had to sneak to go sit in teachers classrooms during lunch, while they had a class going on just because I was so scared of being alone in lunch and this was early senior year. Towards the later end I got out of my comfort zone and honestly just started talking to people, random classmates, people I thought looked cool, or just asking kids in class if I could sit with them at lunch. Granted it literally never worked out besides 1 person out of me asking like 70 people…. But it at least worked out one time. It’s hard and lonely and socializing is a scary journey but you’ve got to start! But like Sia said, might not have had crazy success now but I’m sure the more people I talk to and the more I put myself out there, one day I’ll find that friend or hopefully boyfriend that’ll want to hold a conversation with me, just got to give it time and keep trying. Wishing y’all the best. ❤️
I love this so much, I’m gonna pin it ❤️
@@SiaaSpits Stress about success. You look like you'd start a fashion company.
As someone who was a loner I CANT STAND those “Ugh I wish I was a mysterious and cool loner” it’s always the extroverts that say that and I hate sm like no u dont
Theres a diff between loner and lonely BTW. Pretty sure no1 wants to be lonely, but ppl may want to be loner.
EXACTLY. like some girl i thought she was my friend told me "i like the old you better" (the old me was me being left out and alone) and she told me that she wishes she was a loner
I just graduated HS without friends lol. No close friends in grades 9-11 as well. But uni is a new start
i hope uni turns out good for you
@@SiaaSpits thanks bro. And I hope you make some really close friends before HS ends. There’s still time :)
Did you attend the graduation? I don’t care honestly if I have no friends in highschool since it’s kind of late and everybody has their own group so it’s hard inserting myself into it. But I do want people talk to and take pictures with after the ceremony so my family doesn’t think I’ve been a loner
Same but worse for me cause people talk to me once every 3 days and it’s about school work or borrowing a charger or pen, and freaking glad highschools over for me 😭
@@hallooos7585 yea it’s always about asking me for stuff like homework, laptop chargers, erasers, etc. Never about me or my day. Sometimes I’d try and talk to them but the convo dies out quick
As someone who’s bad at making friends, I agree that assigned seats and teacher chosen groups are the holy grail to make friends :3
Edit: not to be that person BUT DAMN- Ty guys sm! ^^
fr
i knowww! this year my teacher did that for my class but it kinda backfired cause the kid she sat next to me didn't want to sit in the first desk and wanted to go with his friends, he was a bit rude at first but he has gotten a bit better day by day.
Are you guys just shy is all? How come you aren't able to make new friends? I'm genuinely asking, like do you try to make friends but there is no connection, or do you just not talk to anybody?
@@ArianeM-gk2vp I sometimes try, it's just that I live in a small town and go to a small high school and have a lot of drama going on right now so it's a bit hard but I try
@@ArianeM-gk2vp
Hi! The reason why most of use can’t make friends is because of something call social anxiety or just being a introvert :3 it just makes it so it’s hard to communicate to others :) because we’re scared of making a bad impression of someone, hope that helps!!
Imagine how insulting it would be if you could not find a friend in a group based around having no friends 😭
The growth I’ve been getting this month is so crazy and I just want to thank you all for the comments and support. It feels so good to know I’ve been able to be a voice of relatability when it comes to school :)))
Hey did you nade some friend
Yeah, yt for some reason has been recommending me more small ytbers. This isn't a bad thing at all, cause I like supporting small ytbers, hope you have success in your senior year and youtube. There's 1,000 people rooting for you 👍
Bruh, as a shy person who had a lonely senior year, i would've tried to be your friend in a heartbeat 😭❤️
fr
I LITERALLY JUST CAME FROM WATCHING YOUR FIRST VIDEO THEN I WAS WONDERING “hmm I wonder if she’s doing ok now?” AND HERE YOU ARE❤❤❤
SAME
Me too!
OMG SAME
SAME BAAHAHA
same!
I went through high school alone. And university is shaping to be the same. My problem has never been that I don't talk to people, its that the interactions never leave whatever container they start in. Whether that be a classroom, a school club, or a random conversation. We know each other for the allotted time and then never after that. I'm already a junior in college, not that that doesn't mean I can't make friends, but I want to emphasize that I have tried. I feel like loneliness has shaped my view of the world. Life isn't about living, its about the fight for survival. Surviving school, surviving work, surviving life stresses. Friends are a distraction from the unending battle to stay alive, and it becomes clear once you've been alone for long enough. I should also mention that the whole, "fight for survival" thing doesn't mean you can be mean, rude, or push others around. The opposite, really. We all must fight to live, so we all have an obligation to help each other keep going. Sorry for the life philosophy dump, its just how I've felt.
Have you ever tried getting their numbers and doing an activity after that situation? It could be something as small as playing a game together, or just talking about an assignment. Ive done this and its snowballed into me getting to know the person better.
If you’re tired of shallow conversations, be a little bit unhinged, it can be as simple as sticking out your tongue to them in the hallway (or if you think they’ll find it rude just say hi lol) do as I say not as I do bc I only have 1 friend and this is what I did
i've been locked in a cycle of making friends in my classes but never end up talking to them outside of school so when the school year ends and I don't have any classes with them next year, I just completely stop talking to them. and that's been going on for two years now. its so weird to make so many friends that I can laugh and talk to just for it to completely disappear because they're all more comfortable with sticking to their already existing friend groups than making new long lasting friendships
Y is this me too 😅 i be getting friends and then forgetting them the next year
bro they are "school buddies" not real friends its hard to make REAL friends in school
frr
Kind of irritates me how people never want to step out of their comfort zone, but you're not in charge of convincing someone you're "worthy" to change for
Same
Having small talk with random people is like planting seeds for them the next time they meet you, like a _"person will remember that"_ type of interaction. That makes future conversations more comfortable to strike up
Mate, they remember you as the speckle perosn who tried to strike up a conversation over nottin cause you have nobody to talk too
@@hhproductions8254 don't be self defeatist mindset
I’m so glad that your’ve taken a different approach, and are slowly finding success. The goal isn’t to be the popular kid, but to speak up and simply find a clique of like minded individuals. I had to do that, and now I’ve built a competent group of connections. Good luck to you and the rest of the lonelys out there.
goat bro omg youre videos actually are my saving grace. God bless you and your family and if you have pets i pray for your pets and thank you for youre videos its nice to see someone thats not in their 20s talk about having no friends
Sophmore me had a mindset of "real friends start at college im built different" or something but i really stepped out of my comfort zone and tried to find my people that same year, I am currently a senior, and Im rlly glad for the past me for showing that effort, now I cant spend a day without talking w them, i hope everyone finds their crowd too one day.
How did u step out of ur comfort zone?
@ girl I typed a long ahh paragraph, then realized everything I said sounds like a sob story when simply my sentences could shorten to “I was so lonely that I was desperate to change my habits.” I realized this was becoming a problem when my reasoning to not want to go to school wasn’t lessons or wasn’t the teachers or the awful food, but it was simply being in a room with more than 2 people. I was so insecure about being lonely at school to a point my reality would be constantly reminded to me by myself even when i was outside of school. Id say I definitely had awkward moments while trying to push myself to compliment people, or act like im interested in whatever they’re doing so they’re kind enough to continue the small talk. Some people were interested to talk to me, some felt uncomfortable because of my enthusiasm. I didn’t bother those type of people, I didn’t take it personal and moved on. Some people definitely called me weird because I was so quiet at my freshman year while suddenly being so talkative at sophomore. Those comments really hurt, they made me feel like what I was doing was wrong. Some people realized my attempt was desperate, and some simply didn’t care, being acquaintances couldn’t hurt. I would also make people ask questions abt myself by answering the classic “how was your evening” or “did you the homework” or “what do you think abt miss x” questions long and detailed answers instead of a “good”. A “good.” doesn’t really open any doors, or more like, being nonchalant didn’t open any doors for me. The first month felt like I wasn’t being myself, that I was faking all of it and everybody could tell or everybody gaf, but simply no one cares or no one cares enough to think abt it for more than 2 second, if they do, they are the weird one like lmfaoo why are u obsessed w me.
I also fed myself a reasonable amount of delusions such as, “one day I wont be so socially awkward, will get used to the process of waiting people or giving them a chance to open up to me easily.” And thats kinda correct. I can talk to strangers or have small talk easier now, my attempt isn’t always befriending them, but Im not so shy or even when I blabber my words, Im able to joke about it to kinda give the person speaking to me that Im human, I make mistakes and how okay it is.
So simply my method came purely from desperation, and I hope you find a way that works best for you when socializing, instead of being a depressed like me lmao
i stopped going to school because i was so afraid of my school. i went to a small, private school but even there i was so painfully socially anxious, so moving to this massive big new school was so hard for me and it destroyed my mental health to like a life threatening degree so i just stopped going and i havent gone to school for the whole year. the thing is i like learning and i miss classes, i liked talking to teachers, i liked reading books and doing assignments but recess was hell. walking onto the school campus was hell. walking into any building was hell. walking anywhere was hell. leaving my room was hell. sitting anywhere near anyone was hell. i did kind of want friends but i was so used to just being made fun of and teased and talked behind the back of all my life that i was better off alone. i hated being alone but its better than having to surround myself with people that will just hurt me more. i still just wanted a friend but it was just impossible. im not funny. im not smart. i have nothing to talk about and im not interesting. im not nice. im always tired. i dont blame others for not wanting to talk to me. but the problem is that sometimes in school you are in situations where you LITERALLY HAVE TO TALK TO PEOPLE TO GET BY and i just couldnt i just never could ever. i make everything awkward. and im fine with not having to talk to people because im used to it. i just hate having to be around people and talk to people that i have no idea how to be okay around.
Honestly this video is so inspirational lol talking to people is so hard but knowing other people struggle just as bad as me feels comforting
I just watched your video like right before this one. it's actually so crazy that I clicked onto your profile and there was an update! You seem like such a cool person and I really liked your papa's bakeria game play from the og video!
thank youuu!!
I’m glad you made this video. First day, I didn’t go, I cried in bed, I couldn’t deal with it. The next day, I did go, and it wasn’t as bad as I expected. The people in my class aren’t really my kind of people but they aren’t assholes, so it’s ight, but they still aren’t friends, just classmates, its just hard
glad to see you stepping out of your comfort zone and having acquaintances!!! i also hated answering in class but more recently ive been answering way more because im a nerd lmao
for me i pushed myself from barely maintaining eye contact out of shyness to actually holding long conversations with 2 friends at school 🎊 (it took uhhhh 5 years + moving schools but hey its progress!!!!)
felt like two b*tches in a same pod fr tho 😭😭
honestly im really glad i have at least one friend, is it too much to ask for a someone to get feral over the fandoms im in tho 😔(yes it is...)
hope senior year goes well for all of us here!!!
Yess you get it, and senior year will go well I can feel it
As someone who has friends but finds it very difficult to make new friends in particular environments, I can say I understand.
It's different from school, but I've been in this same team sport club for just about 8 years now with new teams and people every year, and throughout the whole thing I have not once made a friend. It's one of those things where you try to start with small talk: "how was your day?" and then they reply with "good" and end the conversation or leave you to talk to someone else. Especially since it's such a close environment in your team and there's no where to hide when you're all alone. It sucks so bad and I've had my fair share of tears when I come home from a training session feeling useless and isolated, but I love the sport so who cares. I'm debating just switching clubs to try and find a better spread of people, but next year I'm going to college and hopefully I can just join the clubs there and take my shot.
This is extremely relatable. I’m a senior now and i haven’t had a friend thought the entirety of school. in elementary school i had a few acquaintances lmao. the best part is that im an extremely uninteresting person with zero interests or skills so even if i do try talking to people i’d have nothing to talk about lma
anxiety peaked 2 years ago though it’s slightly better now (i don’t feel like jumping off a cliff when entering school but it’s still lonely and not fun at all)
same senior year sucks when u don't have any friends
I don’t got many friends too and I’m a sophomore in hs your video is very relatable and I get nervous talking to people because I don’t want them to laugh at me
honestly this might sound weird but the best advice i’ve ever gotten is to go talk to the gay kids. i was super lonely and had no friends for months until i talked to this one trans guy i sat next to in science class and now he’s one of my best friends. most know what it’s like to be lonely/bullied/etc and are much more accepting than the average person, plus in my experience much funnier and more genuine and kinder
girl i literally love u
we are and were in the exact same situation
it gets better after high school, too and I graduated only this year
Im in college now and with the help of that and working in a place with other teens, my social skills have been improving so much. I think its just us getting older and realizing that the things we worried about then were just overthinking and focusing too much on how we look to others. (well thats how it was for me mostly lawl)
Happy for you!!!
I relate to this so hard. I’m a senior this year as well. I was incredibly lonely from my eighth grade year to my sophomore year. I changed schools my junior year bcs I couldn’t bear it any longer.
I made friends quickly bcs I did cross country which helped me get a headstart bcs a team like that is kinda built in friends.
I used to have such bad anxiety about school but having that year in a new environment helped me grow.
We have different circumstances, but one thing that helped me a lot is just starting random conversations. Most people will not think you’re weird for talking to them!
I wish you the best in making friends!
im also in my senior year of highschool with no friends, im still kinda scared to speak up in class but after seeing this video ur right, this is my last year who cares if my wrong or whatever, life goes on
Omg!! Got so excited when I got this notification. It’s so cool to see ur face u seem mad cool!! And yeah the fuck it we ball thing with senior year is so real I’ve been cooling this year.
exactlyy its not worth it getting worked up by school anymore
im 16 and Tmr is going to be my first day of class in college. I have made some "friends" during orientation but they are not in the same class as me. I hope i will be able some friends😭😭. During highschool i really struggled to make friends and all my remaining friends left me. It will be hard because many people in my college came together as a group and i dont think they are keen on making new friends
I really liked this video, came out so real and realistic. I also experienced/ is experiencing loneliness, I use to be in a trio last year and 1 of us got separated into another class, me and my friend with be grew apart as she found new friends in our new class while my other friend grew apart in his new class leaving me by myself a lot but I’m doing fine I guess, I casually communicate with others in my class and I’ve been connecting with more people. I guess I realised how dependent and vulnerable I was outside my comfort zone with friends but now I learnt more about myself and really looked into myself more.
Heh I've been going to school without friends since sixth grade (12th grade now) with crippling anxiety and bouts of depression, and since I was bullied in middle school, I blamed it on the people around me.
I changed schools twice, then COVID happened and I was totally comfortable attending class in an online setting, but it took me till 11th grade to realise that most of the people around me were normal, kind people and that I was the problem (or at least, the outlier). Got diagnosed with ASD recently, which explains my abnormal behaviours people don't seem to like. But I'm still emotionally and socially crippled. My close friends don't have any classes with me (one of them is in a different school), and my psychiatrist accidentally spilled to me I might be schizoid (i.e., having schizoid personality disorder), but where I live, they couldn't formally test me for it until I'm 18. Having that condition isn't something separated from the general public, even though it's rarely diagnosed. Zoids are found in plain sight, it could explain a lot about the social and emotional tendencies of so many people, so who's to say that many of us people's situation might actually be a trauma response?
Now, I'm not implying that all lonely teenagers have a personality disorder, but I'm in a situation where I crave for human connection, but can't form relationships with people I constantly have to be around, such as my classmates. I also get along considerably better with little kids (friends of sister or sister of a friend) and teachers in my school than anyone in my age group, possibly because of the distance, but I'm forced to be around people my age all day, and it's suffocating.
Sorry for this long rant, but if you made it this far, I appreciate you reading this!
Im scared asf for highschool, like i dont wanna be lonely and stuff but your vids are helping me get out of my comfort zone, so thank you vro💯💯💯
It’s comforting to know that we are going through the same struggles. I am still trying to learn how to overcome my anxiety and overthinking by watching how other people interact with each other. It’s just so hard to come out of my comfort zone and just talk but I really want to get better.
Also best of luck to you and congrats on improving ❤
girll I lowkey want to be ur friend haha. Also that vid made me realize that I am not the only person that is going through that exact situation rn 😂
Im also in my senior year, super outgoing and friendly, i love making jokes and caring about people. I still have only 1 real friend and shes been dealing with a lot of hard stuff, so it really feels like i dont have anybody right now :( I have decent "friends" at school but they would never open up to me and so i dont to them
I had extreme social anxiety all through ought middle school and high school until I graduated. If we went to the same school I would have befriend you fr
I just started my freshman year of highschool and I just saw ur highschool video from a year ago and I’m going through the same thing lol, except I don’t really care if i have friends or not. I just live my life and if i get friends i get friends and if i don’t i don’t
See, that's how I feel. Sometimes I wish I could share something I find interesting with someone, but most of the time I quite simply do not care - I don't even feel lonely. Hopefully college/uni will be fun, because generally the people you see the most there are taking the same class/interested in the same things as you.
Girllll!!! I LOVE your braids! And also i am really lonely and i love horror movies too😍 i am just starting my sophomore year, i am really, really lonely and i thought i was alone in this, but no. It’s a good to hear that people like me exist:) you truly gave me hope, and also you seem really nice, and i’d like to get to know you better sooo yeah.. if you see this comment thank you for your support:) ( and also i grew up watching films on cd’s so i don’t think the brainrot is affecting me lol😂)
I’m also a sophomore in high school with not many friends that is nervous to talk to people so maybe we can be friends?
It sound cheesy as hell but you strong as hell for doing what you did. I wish I had the same thought process while I was still in school 🧙🏽♂️🥑
I was just watching the original vid, and legit thought "hmm, I wonder if anything has changed in the past year", perfect timing ig haha
kudos to you!! 👍
the senior mentality is so real, although is very humbling 😭
Being in a small school like I am is simultaneously good and bad. On the good side, every year things get much more familiar (so long as I let them). On the bad side, it's hard to change my way of things when everyone already knows me as something I don't want to be.
i moved across the country so like, i have friends but i dont have any at high school and its really hard bc the friends i do have i cant really see so yeah also i dont feel like i click w anyone at my school,, like its kinda hard for me to want to be myself at my school so um ye 👍
your point about bonding over similar interests during small talk rings true! I was friends with someone for nine years because when we were eight we bonded over animal jam and my little pony. Things just happen to spark between people because of the littlest things, so let go of having a rigid, pessimistic mindset and go with the flow when talking with people. Youll find your people eventually. Great video! c:
This can the the video that reminds me that I am not alone (I'm still alone at school 🥲)
Same. I do talk to two people but the only time I actually get to Interact with them is during lunchtime, or I somehow bump into them in the hallways. Overall it suck honestly.😔
@@notbutters lucky you. I litterally have no one to talk to at ALL. Scary thing is that the one kid that sits alone in school movies is more realistic. 🥲
@@gamer.kingz1033 look I’m not the best at advice or recommendations, and it might or might not help, but idk when your school started but it’s September, one of my friends said I should (possibly) join a club or try something where people have the same interests as me, so maybe you could try that.
(I have no idea I’m sorry I don’t want anything to be taken the wrong way rn. I haven’t even joined a club but I’m considering it)
@@gamer.kingz1033the same bro and that's really hurt me🙃💔
I honestly resonate with this a lot
Talking to people and being afraid of social rejection is a real struggle lol
Honestly i have been watching A LOT of these videos about steeping out of your comfort zone and living your life to the fullest and I couldn't exactly picture myself doing anything that the person in the video suggested but the way you speak about your experience, it's so relatable and it actually gives me ideas of how I can talk more to people in school, thank you so much for like an actually good advice that genuinely works for me
As someone whos starting 10th grade it's so hard to find people who are willing to be friends with me that are not the "class clown kids" which seems to be most highschoolers now in days. I still talk to my middle school friends, but it hasn't been the same sence I left the state to a new one. I've tried talking to people but no one wants to talk to me because I'm the "Smart kid" Like ITS NOT MY FAULT IM SMART, so usally kids would just turn around and basically talk sh** about me when I'm not even 2 feet away from them. I'm also starting to realize that I was bullied during my freshman year by most people in my grade because of the many experiences I had and a example would be that one time a girl literally threw her bag across the room and it managed to hit me and she proceeded to act like it wasn't on purpose. I'm currently "Friends" with a juinor but these past few days she hasn't talked to me after she switched classes so now I'm completely alone at school with no one to talk to. Being alone really makes me wish that I was still with my middle school friends (which I would of have been with if I didn't leave the state) we talk every week or so but we've been talking less or less and we haven't talked in a month. Lastly really praying that I can find a friend this year, at least one would be fine I just need somebody :(
Also my grammar sucks so sorry yall😅
hey ALWAYS BE the "smart kid" dont let people put you down for that what you choose, future or temporary fake friends?
People will always isolate those more mature than them, simply because it makes them jealous. High school doesn’t have to be the only place you find friends. Think of your interests. Could you find a club with them in your area? Or if not, have you ever tried a socialization group? I know it sounds weird, but trust me the people there are actually willing to have decent conversations and not be jerks about it.
Started from the bottom now we here 💯💯💯💯💯💯
literally a few minutes ago I saw your original video- I relate to it a bunch and I am also in my senior year right now! Despite just discovering your channel it’s so awesome to see your growth and you taking steps to make small conversations with others. It definitely opened my mind a bit for myself, and going to try and take that into consideration. You’re really funny and well spoken with these videos
Between those 4 years there was small attempts to try and talk to people and engage in conversations that I was familiar with (especially in 9th).
I remember the first highschool friend I made during 9th grade during gym class, she had someone who was closer but over time i had started to get uncomfortable when they had started to become majorly clingy- 10th grade was a really forgettable year for me but also around the time when my mental health was absolutely awful. I despised going to school every single day and had alot of bottled up anger about two of my classes that I was taking at the time. By 11th I feel like people know meee? But it’s just a simple hi in the hallway or whatever, acquaintances. I have somebody who I talk on and off too but both of us don’t have alot to talk about, nor alot in common sadly 😭
But despite it all,, I kinda like being alone in school? Maybe im so used to it it doesn’t bother me when im ACTUALLY there, I don’t mind eating alone doing my own thing, I have alot of online friends who have more similar interests and I feel more comfortable around.. even if not in person. I always look around my classmates thinking who I *MAY* be friends with but never actually attempt. Seeing them interact with others I feel like I could tell the vibe they bring off,, but one day I should try to make more small interaction.
i literally just watched your old video yesterday and just found out you made a follow up to the vid lol, its good to know youre doing well. also get better with your sickness!
thank youu, and I’m ten times better than I was before
@@SiaaSpits thats good to know
Tw: vent(?) I got a new start in highschool i was kinda the new kid, I felt like my depression and suicidal thoughts would end there because I was starting fresh, but no I screwed up so many opportunities to make new friends because I can't be a normal person. (Eye contact, small talk, etc) After a year of highschool (sophomore now) I see this new girl in school and I really wanted to be her friend just couldn't bring myself to talk. (Couple days later she has a whole friend group. Why can't I be likes that? I want ro be able to talk with people without me trying to gasp for air, fidgeting and Looking them in the eyes, getting stuck in words.) my mom says I should have at least 1 friend to riley on, but I screwed up my last friendship. (Sometimes I wish I could go back in time and face my friend, and maybe tell her she was the only one I truly had.) I'm not smart, I don't have any real talent, and I dont even have friends. (Sometimes I just think of ending it. I'm just to scared to die.)
i genuinely can't believe that you're alone in school.. I am too but you have such a fun, outgoing bubbly personality and you're so funny! it's crazy to me that if i saw you at my school i'd instantly try to talk to you lol
I had no friends for most of high school. I even used to shake during school presentations hahaha. This video hit me with a wave of crazy memories. You’re on the right track, keep going! Things do get better
I have this thing where certain people gravitates towards me and wanting to be a friend during the start of the year. It always makes me feel awkward interacting people that I don't know.
But I found this one person in our class who was extremely quiet and doesn't interact with anyone. I knew that the people that wanted to be friends with me have genuine intentions. As a way, I gravitated them towards that friend group which they got along really well.
Though I don't consider myself as a part of that friend group. It's just a thought of me not wanting someone to get left out from the crowd.
I'm already content being alone as it makes me feel more at peace. Its like friendship is a relation that is completely foreign for me.
you're so right with the senior mindset lol. It's way easier taking 'risks' knowing you won't be here for very long
i went through the same issues in highschool, and I graduated in 2021 without any friends as well. I’m in community college now and I’ve made one friend out of all the years, but, I’ve been suspecting I have ASD due to failure to make friends and social cues and the symptoms are very apparent to me. I am also a black woman so I relate a ton to you. I agree on stepping out your comfort zone and talking first because the other person might be afraid to talk as well. I still have a very difficult time finding friends but I am glad to be out of highschool and getting treatment for my ASD symptoms. finding neurodivergent friends has been helping me tremendously, and I have lots of online friends who are neurodivergent so I guess attracting people with the same brain level as u. It gets better though ❤️
i love how you reflected on what thoughts get you going in the morning and how knowing you'll regret one thing more is so powerful because I resonated so much with my brain making things worse all the time
I dont wanna be that mood killer but i really do wish you luck for college because for me personally college is pretty lonely. But i do hope you can make some friends next year!
I graduated highschool years ago and this video touched my heart🥲 also I admire even if you still have any 'real friends' in school your gonna keep trying- a mindset that I rly wanna learn from you
The funny thing is that when in senior year, not so long before winter break/last month of the school, I actually got to "talk" to some people I've never expected to. And even tho that talk didn't grow in to a friendship I sometimes imagine that it might turn into one if I opened up more and not be all so shy back then. I whole heartedly believe similar things will happen to you and since you are going out of your comfort zone, I'm sure you'll not miss the chance! Rooting for you sia🤗💛
I’m glad that things are getting better for you!
"I love referencing my tv shows" SHES SO ME FR RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
Ive went through similar things at school left highschool with 0 friends I must report Ive made great group of friends at uni now !!!!! been friends with them for about 2-3 years as Im a 3rd year its great. you can talk to them they talk to you listen to each other very nice sometimes even oraganise activities out with uni very fun and motivate eo to study. I felt in highschool everyone was the same person lowkey no one that matched my vibes for friends but in uni for diverse better (I dont want to jinx so far so good. It does get better!!!!
Like so many of the girls in HS be low key bullying by excluding and ignoring me from everything and the guys were any better but I still started to sit with one group so I can at least listen to them not sit by myself I would talk to them they would be giving me blanks stares like wtf you trying to say lol it was very awkward at time I wanted to cry jump out the window and with the same people constantly so no one to talk to very isolating finishing the without having talked. Kinda good pandemic hit so I didnt have to see people/I can regather myself end of 2019 was big low. Then after last 2 years of HS I gained confidence I didnt really care about what others thought really as much, continued to talk to people where possible. But what also really helped me is making online friends cause gives you people to talk to vent/rant frustrations and just talk about silly things you cant meet them they live v far away other countries and continents but helps to know in the world someone actually gives a sht about you lol. When its your birthday they give you nice bday wishes too so love that. So many different people of different ages irl I could never be friends with so many people and its been going for years now. Otherwise I just dealt with everything myself so someone irl or online is better than no one in my opinion.
But goodluck I hope you find better people in uni!!!!
i heard someone said that if are trying or looking for something hard enough it well not come to you, you have to stop looking for it, you have to stop craving it, be yourself and work on yourself and it well come when it comes
I wish you the best of luck!
As a senior in HS, I can comfirm this 100%. People just dont wanna talk to me whenever I socialize. Its like they’re ignoring me on purpose. At this point I feel like I am a ghost to society, a curse.
Yoooo I finally found a video where I relate heavily too. Even similar ways of growth and I’m a senior too. Rare occasion. Good video
your very smart and self aware. Even though i dont have that much social anxiety, but i have overall life anxiety. Your helping alot of ppl. Keep spitting Siaa
I just came back from the first video lol, glad you could work and improve on yourself and are happier now! Also you are SO pretty I love your hair
this is so true! me and this girl in middle school bonded over similar senses of humor and we’re still friends up to this day (4 yrs now), i moved so we don’t go to the same school but we still hangout which is good for me mentally since I don’t have friends in school :)
So I’m not sure if having a hard time making friends is related to autism, but it definitely is for me. If you notice a lot of other peoples conversations they are quite shallow. You don’t have to be friends with everyone, but you can find other people with similar interests like what you’ve been doing. Seems like there is a certain disconnect when kids reach high school age. It’s either some become mature, or some double down on asinine behavior from middle school.
I just became Freshman, and it’s tuff I guess? Im mostly just there like I’m called nonchalant or dead, because that’s literally just me, I’m like a dying corpse, barely showing emotion just moving around, not even reacting to anything, just a cycle, but anyways it’s just October, literally just 2 months, it’s inevitable right?? Oh well guess I’ll find out because damn High School it ain’t guaranteed who your friend is because everyone but me is friends with each other. Oh well🤷♂️
ayyyy im proud of you sia i lwk just watched your old video like 5 minutes ago then immediately saw this video
one thing thats helped me alot tho in gaining social skills was getting a job since most cashiers try to be friends with you, and as embarrasing as it sounds i literally studied the people around me trying to figure out why they were so good, and the answer is that they were weird and were open about being weird. And honestly that makes a ton of sense to me, because everybody is secretly weird or brainrotted, and if you are just confidently weird then it makes people more likely to open up to you.
that’s not embarrassing at all, I do the exact same thing, and studying people does really help
watching ur vids is like being on ft w a friend + the mr. peanutbutter reference u so valid 4 dat 🗣️ im glad uve made such progress i hope u can continue to make friends
Honestly having the same questions and experiences myself, im glad to have heard this perspective from someone else. It really helps put into perspective what’s wrong with my own, so thanks 🤞
girl i just saw that video, and now this one popped up. i haven't finished it but i am excited for it
Proud of this whole journey!
I just watched the first video before this one, and i kinda just want to say that these videos really helped me w my mindset. im a freshman in hs--at a completely new school--and its been HARDDD trying 2 talk to people. i still have my friends from my old school, and ive met two juniors at my new school, but things have still been getting lonely and its still difficult. im thankful that the people ive met decided to ignore my awkward shi and actually get to know me, n im blessed to have a mom who is forcing me to go to football games n such.. though its still a lil soul-crushing that no one my age is willing to be good acquaintances rather than: "oh yeaahh were friends ahaha" n allat fake stuff. something that helped me make friends was, like you said, just little things here and there to the person you sit next to. im HEAVILY introverted so while its hard to talk, i like to listen a lot : )! i also made strong connections to most (if not all) of my teachers. my mom would tell me that when the time came for a seating chart, that you could always talk to them about how its a struggle to interact w a group thats alr close. and if you dont tell them that directly, theyll most likely figure it out by how you interact.. or lack thereof.. with the folks around you. im typing this comment suuper late at night so my fault if it makes no sense (and ermm this is my 1st ever youtube comment) but i js wanna share one last thing i pinky promise; something my mom has always told me is that you always wanna have your back first (at least in early stages of friendships). cus if YOU dont respect yourself, if YOU dont treat yourself with kindness, if YOU wont speak up for yourself, what makes you think someone else will do all of that. and if you dog on yourself and say that youll never make friends, that is a 1000% guarantee that you will not make friends. give yourself grace, give yourself mercy. let yourself get embarrassed and awkward. if it helps, even an ounce, let it. ive had SO many embarrassing moments in my life and theyve all helped with who i am today. it took me a while to learn to not immediately shut down when i didnt look "cool" while doing something, but i promise that learning to just let it be has let my personality open up so much. anyway.. its like 3 am and i dont even know if im making sense to anyone but myself anymore.. keep on being you and dont let NOBODY change that 💙
omggg I'm also graduating as well! I guess sort of... if I will ever be able to 😭. But anyways, about talking to people... I do have no problems with that. Sometimes I do get nervous when I was expecting something from them... it's just a simple conversation after all. And I have also come to realize that I'm basically unapproachable, yet I'm still going to make the first move THIS YEAR. So I will be using the motivation and helpful advice from your video now on! 😁
omg, its sooo nice to get an update from u !! so glad that ur better now
im in my junior year, and ur video from last year and this new updated video gave me so much comfort and made me feel so heard omgg :((
woah, glad to know youre at least doing a little bit better! i literally just watched the first video like a week ago, so it's nice to see that things are going somewhat better. thanks for the advice!
you’re so pretty and funny!
I just saw that video, I may have no friends in school, and it sucks. My class is nice, but I don't get along with them because the interests differ. Now that is not bad, I adore my few friends, and I just draw during the breaks. I also made an acquaintance in class instead of a friend. She's similar to my type of personality, and I have this year and the next school year left. I'm comfortable, I improve my talking skills, and I walk up to strangers to tell them how cool their clothes or hairstyles look and oh my.. it works! Simple interactions help so much.
making friends tuff ash i got like 5 friends and ive known them for like 3 years to like 11 years 😭
omg i clicked on your first vid like 2 weeks ago and i was wondering if there had been any updates since a year passed and today youtube recommended me this video WHATTT THATS CRAZY but anyway so glad to hear youve been stepping out of your comfort zone and have atleast one person to rely on! you seem like a super genuine and cool person and i hope everything works just the way you want it to💗💗
I JUST watched your og video this week 😭 def a newgen
Sameee
Thank you thank you I literally NEEDED that😞😞
omg im also finally in my senior year!! im very extroverted but had no friends since sophomore year even after ive tried to socialize with people to the point of burnout and exhaustion, i still, although rarely now, struggle with not having friends and it led me to your video
hopefully u post more so we can grow together!! i am also a bitch in the horror movie pod btw, lov ya u gorjas girl
Why are you so cool omggg (congrats to opening up more!!! :3)
Regarding your idea on being your true self, I think most of the anxiety surrounding that often stems from the fact that we feel pressured to act a certain way that is "us," when in reality a lot of people have more than one side to them and act differently around different people not necessarily because theyre being fake, but because they have a side that clicks more with that person.
Personally I feel like i used to struggle with the idea of not being able to act uniformly around people before, but the second i shifted my perspective away from having to act the same around everyone so that i was "my true self" i was able to bring out a lot more of my character towards other people.
For example, despite making this yappanese of a comment right now lol under another circumstance i can be a lot more brainrot
But yeah, congratulations on making friends, being able to put yourself out there can indeed be really difficult at first :')
I watched the first video like a week ago and i definitely related, i just started highschool and i hope i meet more people
Hey! I’m choosing of going to in person school vs online what should I do? It’s a hard choice since I’ve been bullied for 3 years straight haha
If you feel online is truly for you and makes you feel more comfortable then you should choose it. The only downside is the social aspect. Yet, if you go in person and you’re going back to the school that you got bullied at, and your school hasn’t done anything about it maybe try transferring? In the end I can’t really give any advice regarding that because the biggest decision maker is yourself
W, you sound like me when I yap sometimes😭😭
This is what i want my mindset to be 😫😫🙏🙏
I can’t believe I just watched your no friends video and you JUST posted an update.
I was just watching yours from a year ago and then I got this recommended from two weeks ago
omgg i just watched your vid and you made a pt2!? i hope everything is alright now
Yeah, I love assigned groups and assigned seats.
Otherwise, I'd stand awkwardly and wait for any openings 😂
I can’t relate to your experience, but I enjoyed hearing about your perspective and experience so thanks for sharing!
FINALLY SOMEONE ELSE WHO LIKES ASSIGNED SEATS!!