1)Take Initiative 2)Prioritize your physical presentation 3)Embrace the power of mystery 4)Become well rounded 5)Build confidence through action 6)Master emotional intelligence Your channel has been so helpful. Happy holidays to you and yours. Thanks for all the amazing videos.
Yeah but you can't control them, you can only control yourself. Also women are Chaos, Men are Order. Their minds pull them in a dozen different directions at once, trying to prioritize all of those things. Our job as men is to cut through all that to discover and prioritize what is actually important, and then to act decisively and efficiently.
@@JiGantus Nobody wins in this clown world. Younger women may have lots of options, but in the end they all (or most) want a loving family with kids and grandkids and ONE long-term husband they can respect and adore, to cultivate the endorphins/ocytocin/dopamine etc., -- basically protecting them from going mad with 12 cars and boxes of wine and SSRI's. And when a woman is 40 or 45 she does NOT have a lot of "options" -- that make sense to her. She will still be hypergamous, but there's no men around to satisfy her instincts, - "where are all the good men", - so SHE will also end up alone, in the end. She should lock down a quality man in her 20's, instead of YOLOing the C carousel or "building her career" or abusing her youthful SMV. And no games. Ain't nobody got time for that.
@@JiGantus Nobody wins in this clåwn world. Younger wqmen may have lots of options, but in the end they all (or most) want a loving family with kids and grandkids and ONE long-term husband they can respect and adore, to cultivate the endorphins/ocytocin/dopamine etc., -- basically protecting them from going mæd with 12 cars and boxes of wine and SSRI's. And when a w0man is 40 or 45 she does NOT have a lot of "options" -- that make sense to her. She will still be hpergamous, but there's no mæn around to satisfy her instincts, - "where are all the good mæn", - so SHE will also end up alone, in the end. She should lock down a quality man in her 20's, instead of YOLOing the C karousel or "building her career" or amusing her SMV. And no games. Ain't nobody got time for that.
What you should be saying Courtney: Don’t be on your phone more than half the time. Don’t wear pajamas outside the house. Be more considerate and laid back among others as best you can.
Just know you can do everything said as well as within the book to stand out BUT if she doesn't like you or find you attractive it doesn't matter. You are to continue to pick yourself up, move on, and try again. Over and over until someone recognizes you for who you are, what you stand for and how you treat those around you then appreciates that. Until then get used to the turbulence of dating, ghosting, situtionships, hookup culture and being rejected.
All women? You're going to blame all women? The actual truth is that some women are trying to be better for their potential partners. This issue isn't a man vs. woman thing, it's secure vs. insecure, confidence vs. lack of confidence, understanding vs. misunderstanding, trying vs. not trying.
@ when did I say all? And yes it’s the women (not all) that have created this current situation we find ourselves in. They are the ones not reciprocating in the dating market. Where have you been for the past few decades!!??
@@joelbellJBFor the past few decades ,people have been getting married.If you have a negative attitude,you may not be attracting quality women,that may be the issue.
@@joelbellJB Okay, you wrote "it's the women," which could easily be taken to me "all the women." But I'll concede. Despite that, I hope you realize that it's also "the men (not all)" that have created this situation, too. Where have I been the last few decades? Well, I was married for 20 years, and for the last 3 1/2 years I've been dating, probably two or three dozen first dates, many second dates and beyond, and now, as of a couple of weeks ago, maybe entering into a long-term relationship. I've likely had more dating successes and, more importantly, failures than you. You say women don't reciprocate. I don't find that to be the case at all. I've had women offer to pay for meals and event tickets, I've had women suggest date ideas, give me gifts and I've had women make first contact with me. In my experience, they most certainly do reciprocate, maybe not at the same rate as men, but over the years society has set things up so the men are the ones that are "supposed" to take charge. But that responsibility is slowly averaging out so that men and women are both starting to take equal levels of responsibility in dating.
I think if you are going to be direct and confident, you need to remember that it is done with intention. Eg: "I like spending time with you" if her response is vague, slow, or avoidant, then it is time to move on. A good response is her setting up the next date
"Be yourself" is the most terrible and patronizing advice ever. Do you think people who struggle with dating have been somehow faking it? They ARE being themselves. Being themselves is what got them into their current situation. How exactly do you equate acting in a way that is completely different to how you've always acted with "being yourself"?
In order to get the women you first need to earn the respect from the other people around you through personal accomplishments/achievements. How do you do that? By being above average in as many ways as possible than most everyday guys. Remember that women only like bold-looking, influential guys with style and personality. I'll give you a random example: When you're at a bar and you see someone smoking a cuban cigar while you smoke a common cheap cigarette who do you think women will like more, you or him? Another example: If you're at a bar where 98% of guys order a coffee or a hot chocolate to drink while you order 2-3 glasses of whisky who do you think women will like more, them or you? All I'm trying to tell you is that you have to stand out from the crowd in as many ways as possible. Yet another example: Most guys have shaved, baby-like faces so when you have a manly moustache who do you think women will like more, them or you? You get what I'm saying? Another example: When others wear common cheap shoes while you wear a badass pair of cowboy boots who do you think women will like more, them or you? You get it now?
biggest problem for men is to even find a possible partner and meeting girls today is mission impossible. you rarely find single good women, they either taken or jumps from one relationship to another so the compettion is very high. i havent encountered any possible partner through work,hobbys and social activitys the last 5 years and it seems like the one you maybe feel is right , they dont find you attractive enough. so the game is so hard that many just gives up and follow their reachable dreams like , career , hobbys and life goals . no reason to wait and hope for the best. live life and see what comes around.
I'm married and old, so I'm not looking, but this doesn't seem like a problem at all to me....women are everywhere and many seem available. I think many men's "standards" may be too high.
@@garypierce7380 that’s laughable, have you even been paying attention? There has always been low tier men, but these men were never an option to begin with. We have a new phenomenon where women’s partner selecting strategy is openly unchecked, encouraged, applauded, and is the mainstream narrative. Where men’s is now considered “bad”, we used to have similar status people pair off with one another, for example an average man with an average woman. But since women’s “segsual” liberation we now have low tier, average and high tier women all demanding higher tier men (and getting them) This has led to a situation where the significant majority of men are left with zero prospects of a partner, and the top tier men getting access to almost all of the women. The average man is no longer good enough for the average woman. This is why ours marriage, birth, and dating rates have been dropping like a rock for the past 50 years. How do you not know this by now?
How to Stand Out to Women in 2025 1. Take Initiative Plan thoughtful dates, follow up, communicate clearly, and be consistent. 2. Improve Appearance Maintain grooming, dress well, and choose a signature scent. 3. Be Mysterious Share authentically but pace disclosures to maintain intrigue. 4. Be Well-Rounded Cultivate hobbies, stay curious, and engage in meaningful conversations. 5. Build Confidence Through Action Achieve goals, step out of your comfort zone, and lead decisively. 6. Master Emotional Intelligence Be attentive, adapt to social cues, and create meaningful connections. 7. Focus on Connection Prioritize making her feel valued over trying to impress.
Thanks Courtney. The tip that resonated the most was to focus on making a connection on the date- not impressing. The connection itself will make an impression!
Thanks Courtney. I've been watching your videos for well over a year now. Even took your advice on fragrances and bought the Guerlain L'Homme. Great suggestion 👍. LOTS of compliments.
I think we can also add another must have to the list. Personally, I'd wish that in 2025, men would be more granular about their mission in life and what they want to achieve in the world. In this way, they will also discover whether or not they actually want a life partner. They would subsequently be able to define what type of women best to partner with, to go on that mission with, and would stop chasing women for unhelpful reasons, and without any strategy. It's about optimising for a quality partner without having to go on a billion unnecessary and unhelpful dates. Once you know what path you want to walk, and you start walking it, its easy to see who is walking along that path beside you.
You aren't wrong and your advice seems reasonable. Only after decades of no success at all after trying everything over and over.. it is difficult to stay positive (i'm 45 and the most success so far was 2 dates with the same woman)
I am glad I'm ready in 2025 because next year I will be working on myself during Christmas & hopefully get more dates with bright intelligent women again. It has been a very unsuccessful year for me with no public dating going on at all
I clearly standout to women yet few are of any interest to me. It’s a game in which I choose not to play. It’s the place and time where this occurs which really matters. Had plenty of attention at the club, not the place to meet..
As someone who went on three dates with the same woman in the last month, my advice is this: focus on getting to know each other and stay positive. For me, this worked extremely well because it gave me a chance to reflect more on what I want from a romantic relationship. I may still be single, and that's okay, because I'm proud and thankful for what I've learned and experienced recently, and I feel ready and encouraged to continue dating in the coming year!
Men and women want each other, and we were designed to be together. No amount of social engineering, cynicism, bitterness, and nihilism can change human nature.
@@Guigley Maybe but it is quite effective though. With how few young men even want to bother these days. And not that women notice...but that is another story. Yeah biologically we are attracted to each other, that is over 90%. Some are wired different. But with how things are done and expected these days I can see how whole generations are just giving up on it. And at this point I am not even sure if it can be fixed. Oh well. Popcorn is delicious.
Maybe do a video on guys showing interest and appreciation without pedalstalizing women? The burden is always placed on the guy, who is always expected to make the first move. To me, this pedestalizes women. This needs to stop. Let there be equal and shared dialogue, risks, and burdens right from the start. Guys can approach, act, and react accordingly if they know the girls reaction mistakes. I hope this makes sense.
How to stand out, same as any other year. Be tall, handsome, rich, mysterious, highly educated, a comedian, adventurous, kind, forgiving etc. For most women a guy has to have it all
I think the idea her is just to live your best life in 2025, and take the opportunities when presented. I think that I possess many of these qualities, I just need to get out of my comfort zone and actually talk ;;to more people, women included. To that end I am going to call tomorrow and ask the company setting up a speed dating event in my town what the age groups for the event are. Aa long as the ages aren't too much lower than mine I am going to get a ticket even though it terrifies me. Merry Christmas to all and don't give up hope, success comes when you least expect it.
More to add, these are features sub5s usually have: -Bald -Rounded cheeks due to being overweight -Acne Scarring -Non-Existent Eyebrows Eyes: -Buldging Prey eyes with too much upper eyelid exposure, the opposite of hunter eyes -Bug Eyes -Negative Canthal Tilt (which ofc leads to prey eyes) Midface: -Long horsefaces -Recessed and underdeveloped midfaces -Low-Set cheekbones Jaw -Recessed and Asymmetrical Jawlines -Rounded w/ loose hyroid skin -Overly narrow
Courtney, your advice is good and has genuinely helped to improve my life dramatically. Still single though. There's some secret beyond having all your shit together.
1) Taking initiative: I'm not doing that unless we have a relationship already established. I'm not an idiot. 2) Physical care/fashion: I'm already doing it and apparently that's bare minimum since it didn't change anything. 3) Being mysterious: I don't talk about myself that much but this also made some girls be afraid of me for some reason. Do they want to discover me or do I have to reveal myself more? Make up your mind! 4) Being well-rounded: I did this through my entire childhood, and not the girls I've met. They should measure up instead of asking, asking and asking. 5) Confidence through action: I can be quite confident in my workplace. Not just girls, everyone trusts in what I do. Again, this doesn't take me anywhere. Also, what exactly is it to girls if I tackle some challenges? I do them for myself. How does a girl (or anyone) benefit from me learning Tagalog for example? I'm not going to speak Tagalog in my daily routine. This part reminds me of women's tendency of waiting at the finish line of a parkour and picking the winner guy for themselves, instead of running alongside him. Which I find ABSOLUTELY UNATTRACTIVE in a woman. 6) Emotional intelligence: I'll give credit for this since I'm recovering from a years long depression. However, my 4 years younger brother went through the same and he has a 3-years old and still going relationship (they met through Discord) while I am still alone. Courtney. It seems to me that your advices are getting stale. Either come up with a new solution or stop giving us false hope. But why the heck I am giving lecture to someone who's still getting sponsorship from shady companies like BetterHelp is beyond me.
In order to get the women you first need to earn the respect from the other people around you through personal accomplishments/achievements. How do you do that? By being above average in as many ways as possible than most everyday guys. Remember that women only like bold-looking, influential guys with style and personality. I'll give you a random example: When you're at a bar and you see someone smoking a cuban cigar while you smoke a common cheap cigarette who do you think women will like more, you or him? Another example: If you're at a bar where 98% of guys order a coffee or a hot chocolate to drink while you order 2-3 glasses of whisky who do you think women will like more, them or you? All I'm trying to tell you is that you have to stand out from the crowd in as many ways as possible. Yet another example: Most guys have shaved, baby-like faces so when you have a manly moustache who do you think women will like more, them or you? You get what I'm saying? Another example: When others wear common cheap shoes while you wear a badass pair of cowboy boots who do you think women will like more, them or you? You get it now?
You've somehow been hurt, and it's giving you a bad attitude. Having a bad attitude is going to hamper your efforts to find a loving partner. But I can tell you from my own very recent experience that what Courtney is saying is true. I discovered a lot of these things on my own over time. Not all of what she says is easy to adopt for many of us, myself included. But I worked hard and overcame things.
@@Makris_Amaliada9311 What you mention - cigars, drinks, shoes - are all superficial. I can tell you from personal experience that you DO NOT need to stand out from the crowd because of what you smoke, drink or wear, or how tall you are or how rich you are. The women that do care about those things are the women not worth being with - they'll dump you as soon as you don't meet those shallow expectations. It's not what's outside you that counts, it's what's inside. I know it sounds like BS, but it's true. Despite your best efforts, you'll end up meeting women that you absolutely don't click with. Some dates could even be disasters. But it only takes one success... If you're authentic, humble and put your emphasis on her - assuming she's also an authentic, humble person who puts her emphasis on you - you'll do brilliantly. I'm SO lucky because I recently began dating a woman just like that. She's sexy, beautiful, intelligent (and highly educated, unlike me), warm and loving. It's still sometimes hard for me to believe a woman like that could be attracted to me, but sure enough, that's the situation.
Well, just to follow through the video.. my goals for 2025: 1. Find myself a job 2. Work on myself (want to start going to the gym and also improve myself by learning some new skills) 3. Whatever happens next, happens. Unfortunately, this year i went on a date with someone not trying to rush into it but be slightly passive and it backfired in my face and it was doing my head in. A lesson learned and an experience to use for future dates, if that happens. But once i tick off the first 2 of my list, then i work on taking initiative and hopefully finiding someone that wishes to be with me, even with all my faults.
Almost always. Yet when we share this experience, women degrade us and gaslight us into thinking we choose the wrong woman. It is sick. They literally do what they say other women don't. Lol.
Open up slowly (advice I don't always follow, but women seem to be okay with it), and realize that if the woman does use it against you she's not worth your time and attention anyway, as much as it might hurt.
@@davidabarak We are telling you we have done it with dozens of women and *most* use it against men. And you shame us by gaslighting us into believing it is us choosing wrong. Or, this is a habit we noticed. Look, men are just as pathetic. But at least I admit it.
Definite on the fragrance side. Had a very lovely young lady ask me last Monday about the cologne I was wearing. Then on Saturday had another lady say to me that she could spend the entire day just standing beside me enjoying my cologne. I wear Polo by Ralph Lauren and have done so for the past 45 years!!
5:46 This is my fundamental problem with dating. I don't want intrigue, curiosity, excitement, etc, from a relationship. I don't want to date a girl that I have to "discover" new things about all the time and be surprised and excited by new things. I want us to primarily be excited by and discover new things about the world together, not necessarily about each other so much, though that would happen too over time, but for me that should be secondary or even tertiary... Not an active priority. I want to date a woman who (it feels like) I've known since middle school.
Everytime I put on a suit and tie Women can’t take their eye off me. ( Suit with White shirt, 100% Silk tie , Dress shoes or Cowboy boots )……Try it. It Works……Women like NICE things….And Shave and Get a Hair Cut too.
I don't say this to be mean, I find your content wonderful or I wouldn't be here. I wish more were as optimistically impassionate as you. However, we should always call out something wrong when it is wrong. Men don't feel the market (dating world) is competitive. We know it is the opposite. There is no competition, and instead it has become a monopoly. We know the top get to share the women, as well as the bottom. In the middle, those are the forgotten ones. Boring men that can't stand out. Which is the majority of men, and in fact the majority of people. That is the first of many problems in this video. But if that cannot be understood, then men are not understood.
_"We know the top get to share the women..."_ I disagree. My dating life as a short guy with gray and white hair (what's left of it) and moderately adequate bank account has been pretty darned good, and it looks like I'm now entering into a relationship with a woman who I would have considered way out of my league - beautiful, sexy, intelligent, loving, fun. By traditional standards, I'm not at the top of the male food chain. In terms of superficial traits - looks and money - I'm definitely "Mr. Middle of the Bell Curve." For about a decade, I had a hard time asking women out, and in that time I think I went on one date. None of that was the fault of women. However, I worked on building my self esteem, and I realized that being turned down by someone I asked out on a date wasn't the end of the world. There are guys out there who are obese, very short, completely bald, poor, sick, whatever, yet they manage find find women to love and who love them. It's all about how you make the other person feel. Do you make them feel interesting? Do you make them feel appreciated? Do you make them feel attractive (without being obnoxious)? Do you make them feel comfortable around you? All the guys out there who think they can't find a woman are wrong. Period. (And the same goes for women who think they can't find a good man, or men and men or women and women).
@@davidabarak A few things I should point out. Unless you are dating 18-39, your topic on this was irrelevant. We are talking about more than just 45+, or when our hair turns grey or white (I am 41 and date 32 to 42). This is because you cannot speak on the younger generation as though you know them, and that is their age. But let's go over you personally/looks just from what I can tell, vs the average man. Personality-wise you were average, you never initiated, seemed awkward, only went on one date. That's about 80% of men and for most men, a tremendous change to make. Now, you have charisma to an exceptional level. Yes, you do. Not because you are super charismatic but because most men have such a dearth of it. You are also moderately financially successful, ie., very above average. Physically, you are at an age this doesn't matter. It used to. Now it doesn't. So I can't say you are average there or above average. Of course you might be dating 18-30 year olds, so if you are I stand corrected. You just don't seem like that type of guy. But overall, you are exceptional, and just believe you are average because men are led to believe they are less than what they are. In no way what you shared about yourself gives off average impressions.
Yeah these lists always make me feel like I must be WAY ahead of the curve for the most part. Kind of crazy that somebody needs to be told to not be on their phone when they are hanging out with someone, especially on a date.
Most of this falls within the tight-rope walking category of being 'reserved' as a person. How successful that is all depends on the other person. If they are at all interested in you AND do not mind being a little investigative (and ultimately invested) in a relationship, it works. On the other hand, if they are easily frustrated by what they see as 'work, or are quickly bored and make up their mind within a short span of time... It won't.
Ive seen and heard of ppl hooking up for a long time because of close/same birthdays, same last names too. Seems to be a new trend ppl are starting. Don't forget about that, I feel thats why I never found my one while everyone else has because of some stupid dumb luck.
At this point: the problem isn't being attractive to women, it's finding women that care as much about being lady-like as Courtney. Women aren't culturally embracing "a woman's comfort" the way that prior centuries have. They'd be called "sell-outs" by their fellow sisters for such gestures of respect... :/ I don't think women have been taught how to be romantically attractive for at least two generations, only how to be sexually attractive.
For the women to stand out: Try out things men enjoy doing and not everything is dirty or physically demanding. STOP listening to 2 faced women who don’t listen to or talk to real men and not an asshole
I'd be really interested in seeing a video with your thoughts on Date Me Docs. The name is cringingly terrible but I personally think the concept is great. Frontloading the important things about you and what you're looking for in a charming way, so people feel more inclined to really try to get to know you, because what they've already read was so engaging or intriguing. I feel like it does contradict your advice about oversharing a bit, but I think as long as you aren't trauma dumping, then I think it's good, although there is a fine line. Another recommendation is I would love to find some positive non toxic places where a guy could get constructive criticism and opinions regarding his dating profile. So much of the internet is just so negative or outright toxic or filled with trolls, I can't even seem to find anywhere with a healthy community to discuss those kinds of things.
I am 65, and after my 20-year marriage ended, I tried a bit of online dating. I tend to have the most luck in real life. Just meeting folks naturally. So my input would be don't rely on the dating profiles and just rely on meeting people.
Anyone who thinks negatively repels everyone. No one wants to be with that kind of person. He probably complains, looks like garbage, and isn't trying consistently to become a btter version of himself. Has too much free time, and is the most selfish person. The best way to be attractive, be a man, not a boy. Dont get your feelings in a bunch. Be bold, and make your move, be willing to move on, and always strive to become better. Regardless of what girls/women are, accept them for who they are. Be willing to always walk away when they dont get on your program/frame. There's no use in chasing someone who doesn't even like you for you. In the end she will disrespect you, and that humility for a man is the worse feeling ever.
Great advice, I have a different opinion on hobbies though. Hobbies seem like mostly a waste of time. A man’s top priorities should be his career, his health, and his relationships (friendships, romantic, family). Hobbies for the sake of pleasure are taking time and energy away from those three core values. Like the man who spends 3 hours/week on playing guitar or whatever is going to fall behind the man who puts that time towards improving their health, career, and relationships.
It's important for men to learn not to try to push to be in a relationship straight away, it's important to continue to go on dates with her and see what she's like before trying to go straight in to a relationship. Some people can rush this bit, and it can put some people off.
For the women: Also, stop wearing pajamas outside. I don’t. Try listening to us as much as we do our best to listen to your out loud thinking. STOP confusing us with what you want to do
Hi Caleb. I'm not trying to be insulting or dismissive. I know it's not easy, but anything worthwhile usually isn't. I think women are women the world over. The advice seems really good. Let's give it a go. No good comes from giving up 🏆 Nice name you've got 🙃
Does taking initiative also include approaching women in person rather than online? This is perhaps the biggest thing a guy can do to stand out since most men are too timid to risk upfront rejection. I would say make yourself look as presentable as possible, but don't take it over the top by peacocking because she'll know if you're being inauthentic. And she'll know your true fashion sense eventually if the relationship lasts, so there's no point in dressing purely for the sake of impressing others. Yeah, anyone who goes out of their way to share every minute detail of their personal life comes off as desperate and needy, men and women alike. It subconsciously signals that the person is fishing for attention and validation. Striving to be a well-rounded person should apply to both sexes, but women can obviously rely more heavily on their looks in the absence of other qualities. Although long-term relationships typically require more than just surface-level attraction. Yeah, there's two basic types of people in this world: those who talk about aspiring to achieve something and those who actively work on trying to achieve them. Women in general have better social acuity than men, and I think for many of us guys, it's something that we can only learn with experience. These soft skills don't come to us as naturally, especially now when we're having less in-person interactions.
Some very good points made in this video but i ask what is the point of men even trying when quite clearly women just take the piss when it comes to guys trying to stand out. There are no decent woman out there worth bothering with.
Standing out DOES mean we need to be perfect in today's dating world. Taking initiative doesn't mean anything if you're not perfect in the eyes of the woman you approach. Some men want to be passive and want women to take initiative and ask them out. I know there are other men who want women to approach them. Prioritizing physical presentation means we DO need to look like a model. Many attractive men still get rejected when they approach women. I'm attractive, I dress well, and I keep my body healthy. Women never say yes when I ask them out and that could mean I'm not good enough in their eyes. Being mysterious only works if you look like a model. Women ask me for my social media account when I ask them out. Some women want to judge men by what they share on social media. What someone puts on their social media account could be a lie. You can be the most well-rounded man in the world. It won't mean anything if you don't get a chance to show you are well-rounded. If a woman isn't attracted to you then you won't get a first date to show how special you are. Being confident through action depends on how women perceive you. I'm confident and I approach women with confidence. Women never give me a chance. Confidence only matters if she's attracted to you. A lot of men haven't mastered emotional intelligence and they get attention from a lot of women because they are rich or very attractive. Women will complain about these men and ask "where are all the good men?" They are ignoring the good men because they're not attracted to them.
Do I look like a model? I'm guessing the answer is "no." (Sure, looks play a part in romance, but it's not as big a part as you think.) Despite being an aging, slightly balding, out of shape guy with a very modest bank account, I managed to form a loving, growing relationship with a woman who's absolutely beautiful, inside and out. You just need to find the right woman, and that takes time and perseverance.
*"Many attractive men still get rejected when they approach women."* Doesn't make any sense.. They wouldn't even need to approach women since they're attractive. And this is coming from someone who used to be a truerateme user (and still do judge faces on there) *" I'm attractive, I dress well, and I keep my body healthy. Women never say yes when I ask them out and that could mean I'm not good enough in their eyes."* Well, what features do you have in the face that are objectively attractive? (Such as Positive Canthal Tilt, thick eyebrows, colored eyes, square shaped hairline, etc.)
@courtneyryan What are we supposed to do when it seems like we are pretty much doing all the right things that you talk about all the time, and yet no women will even consider a date with you? This seems to be a huge issue where I am. The women in my social circles want to be married so badly, but simply will not say yes to a date with anyone who isn’t a perfect person. I know tons of guys who have everything going for them, and no one will give them the time of day. I try to avoid pointing fingers at the other gender as much as possible, because I know it’s best to focus on what you can control. But it seems no matter what angle I look at it from, there’s no way for me to get around recognizing that (most) women have collectively adopted such a harsh, hypercritical attitude towards men and are greatly hindering the dating scene.
Men, there's a very simple way to decrease your loneliness - increase your usefulness. Definition of usefulness: the quality or fact of being useful Definition of useful: able to be *USED* for a practical purpose or in several ways [emphasis via capitalization and bold highlight added] You can further decrease your loneliness by expecting less in return; if you give 4x more than what you get back, you will be twice as 'lonely' as someone who gives 8x more than they get back, and half as 'lonely' as someone who gives 2x more than they get back.
All you guys here should remember that what Courtney is talking about is what _you_ can do to make yourself more attractive. What she's saying isn't going to change shallow women, and it's not intended to. So please don't blame women as a whole by saying they're only interested in money and looks. There are women for whom that doesn't matter. And be honest with yourselves - are you going to date someone you're not attracted to, whether physically or otherwise? Are you shallow if you're not attracted to a woman who's not what you're looking for? Most women aren't looking for guys like you... or like me. But someone out there is, so you might as well do what it takes to improve the odds. It doesn't mean making yourself into someone you're not, it means improving who you already are.
Although my sense of purpose is about myself, and how to connect to benefit the community - standing out, without a doubt, can have a far greater impact for the good life to sprout. Your words are those of a sabi girl, because sabi means wise, and you give that energy to rise, and fly as high as the sky. Your ‘sability’ makes you A youtube Star, and gives a vibe that can make one stand out in life and go far, like Sabi Girl Ayra Starr. See Honda Stage | Live Performance by Ayra Starr - Sability
See I know I’m attractive physically to women cause they check me out and ask me how I’ve been like I don’t come here everyday. Then I try to slide in the dms and it’s like a slip and slide made out of sand paper. It doesn’t go anywhere if anything the last thing she says before she blocks me is SIRRR THAT IS ENOUGH. Why do some dudes flash their nipples on their pfp and get all the pun, but I say something slightly perverse, and it’s Oh how dare you, you peasant.
You know how you really stand out to most women guys? Not be fat, make sure you’re at least slightly nice to look at, make more money and at least be 6 ft. Not all but this is what most women these days fellas.. oh yeah and make sure you pay for everything.. very important!🤦♂️🤷♂️
@@MrTJMaddox What are you laughing at? Dress bold and act like a man. If you dress and act like a kid then of course women will not like you. Wear a suit, not a t-shirt. Wear boots, not casual shoes. You have to stand out from the crowd in order for women to like you.
It's all about standing out from the crowd. Most people (or should I say "sheeple") are too dumb to realise that. We live in an evil world where you have to be strong to survive, if you're weak and pathetic others will take advantage of you and rightfully so. Appearance is the first thing we all look in others, so if you look like a turd with legs you should not wonder why you're still single. Now, how does one stand out from the crowd? Self-improvement is the answer, improving yourself in all possible ways, both externally and internally, every change - be it small or big - matters and brings you closer and closer to the man you're dreaming of becoming. A man of high value is a strong man that is independent, takes care of himself and is able to provide for a woman to make her feel safe in his (veiny) arms. As a man you have to be a badass and you owe to establish a fearsome image so others will know not to mess with you at the first glance, so level up and stop crying or stay average forever. Most women interact with tens (if not hundreds) of guys in daily basis and for as long as you look like a commoner just like the rest of them women won't want to even spit on you. I'll give you a random example: Let's say that you're at a small local bar where most guys smoke cheap cigarettes and dress like immature teenagers wearing hoodies but you take out a Cuban cigar from a leather case and light it up with an S. T. Dupont lighter, plus having a manly moustache and wearing a bespoke suit, guess who'll the waitress notice!
Just be above 6'3" (varies a bit by country but not much) and get a great haircut ($50). If you want a broader net, wear some tacky jewelry item like a bead bracelet or woven leather necklace.
Make a reservation for a restaurant, even there are never more than 5 people any time of the day. It is so dumb, but works on a woman. Then walk in together and say that you have a reservation.
1)Take Initiative
2)Prioritize your physical presentation
3)Embrace the power of mystery
4)Become well rounded
5)Build confidence through action
6)Master emotional intelligence
Your channel has been so helpful. Happy holidays to you and yours. Thanks for all the amazing videos.
Happy holidays to you and yours! Thanks for being here ❤️
Jesus is the way! He can give you peace that no one else can. Turn from sin and turn to Jesus. He loves you all.
@@CourtneyRyan Jesus loves you!
@@CourtneyRyan Since you've made a video on what nice men say that women don't like, can you make a video on what nice women say that men don't like?
If men shouldn't play hot and cold then neither should women.
Women have lots of options. Most men don’t. That’s why they can play whatever they want, and if you do, you’ll end up alone
Yeah but you can't control them, you can only control yourself. Also women are Chaos, Men are Order. Their minds pull them in a dozen different directions at once, trying to prioritize all of those things. Our job as men is to cut through all that to discover and prioritize what is actually important, and then to act decisively and efficiently.
@@JiGantus Nobody wins in this clown world. Younger women may have lots of options, but in the end they all (or most) want a loving family with kids and grandkids and ONE long-term husband they can respect and adore, to cultivate the endorphins/ocytocin/dopamine etc., -- basically protecting them from going mad with 12 cars and boxes of wine and SSRI's.
And when a woman is 40 or 45 she does NOT have a lot of "options" -- that make sense to her. She will still be hypergamous, but there's no men around to satisfy her instincts, - "where are all the good men", - so SHE will also end up alone, in the end. She should lock down a quality man in her 20's, instead of YOLOing the C carousel or "building her career" or abusing her youthful SMV.
And no games. Ain't nobody got time for that.
@@JiGantus Nobody wins in this clåwn world. Younger wqmen may have lots of options, but in the end they all (or most) want a loving family with kids and grandkids and ONE long-term husband they can respect and adore, to cultivate the endorphins/ocytocin/dopamine etc., -- basically protecting them from going mæd with 12 cars and boxes of wine and SSRI's.
And when a w0man is 40 or 45 she does NOT have a lot of "options" -- that make sense to her. She will still be hpergamous, but there's no mæn around to satisfy her instincts, - "where are all the good mæn", - so SHE will also end up alone, in the end. She should lock down a quality man in her 20's, instead of YOLOing the C karousel or "building her career" or amusing her SMV.
And no games. Ain't nobody got time for that.
@@JiGantus No. And YT auto-deletes my reply explaining why. Can't have the truth here.
What you should be saying Courtney:
Don’t be on your phone more than half the time.
Don’t wear pajamas outside the house.
Be more considerate and laid back among others as best you can.
Just know you can do everything said as well as within the book to stand out BUT if she doesn't like you or find you attractive it doesn't matter. You are to continue to pick yourself up, move on, and try again. Over and over until someone recognizes you for who you are, what you stand for and how you treat those around you then appreciates that. Until then get used to the turbulence of dating, ghosting, situtionships, hookup culture and being rejected.
Underrated as fuck
why bother
... shifting towards 2025
solo again
👏✨✨✨😂😂
I’m not sure how many times we’ll have to say this, it’s not the men! The men ARE trying to become better, it’s the women that aren’t reciprocating.
All women? You're going to blame all women?
The actual truth is that some women are trying to be better for their potential partners. This issue isn't a man vs. woman thing, it's secure vs. insecure, confidence vs. lack of confidence, understanding vs. misunderstanding, trying vs. not trying.
@ when did I say all?
And yes it’s the women (not all) that have created this current situation we find ourselves in. They are the ones not reciprocating in the dating market. Where have you been for the past few decades!!??
@@joelbellJBFor the past few decades ,people have been getting
married.If you have a negative attitude,you may not be attracting quality women,that may be the issue.
@@joelbellJB
Okay, you wrote "it's the women," which could easily be taken to me "all the women." But I'll concede. Despite that, I hope you realize that it's also "the men (not all)" that have created this situation, too.
Where have I been the last few decades? Well, I was married for 20 years, and for the last 3 1/2 years I've been dating, probably two or three dozen first dates, many second dates and beyond, and now, as of a couple of weeks ago, maybe entering into a long-term relationship. I've likely had more dating successes and, more importantly, failures than you.
You say women don't reciprocate. I don't find that to be the case at all. I've had women offer to pay for meals and event tickets, I've had women suggest date ideas, give me gifts and I've had women make first contact with me. In my experience, they most certainly do reciprocate, maybe not at the same rate as men, but over the years society has set things up so the men are the ones that are "supposed" to take charge. But that responsibility is slowly averaging out so that men and women are both starting to take equal levels of responsibility in dating.
It’s a lost cause, bro. We will be blamed for everything the rest of our lives. Even when we do nothing we are bad.
I think if you are going to be direct and confident, you need to remember that it is done with intention. Eg: "I like spending time with you" if her response is vague, slow, or avoidant, then it is time to move on. A good response is her setting up the next date
*Focus on being unapologetically yourself, embracing your unique traits, and aligning your actions with your values.*
I've been doing that for years; it doesn't get me any action.
spammer
"Be yourself" is the most terrible and patronizing advice ever. Do you think people who struggle with dating have been somehow faking it? They ARE being themselves. Being themselves is what got them into their current situation. How exactly do you equate acting in a way that is completely different to how you've always acted with "being yourself"?
@@stevenwallace773 Excellent post
How to stand out: be attractive
In order to get the women you first need to earn the respect from the other people around you through personal accomplishments/achievements. How do you do that? By being above average in as many ways as possible than most everyday guys. Remember that women only like bold-looking, influential guys with style and personality. I'll give you a random example: When you're at a bar and you see someone smoking a cuban cigar while you smoke a common cheap cigarette who do you think women will like more, you or him? Another example: If you're at a bar where 98% of guys order a coffee or a hot chocolate to drink while you order 2-3 glasses of whisky who do you think women will like more, them or you? All I'm trying to tell you is that you have to stand out from the crowd in as many ways as possible. Yet another example: Most guys have shaved, baby-like faces so when you have a manly moustache who do you think women will like more, them or you? You get what I'm saying? Another example: When others wear common cheap shoes while you wear a badass pair of cowboy boots who do you think women will like more, them or you? You get it now?
or rich
and some cash and a few flossy things.
How to stand out: don’t let not being attractive hold you back
How to stand out: by not leaving pessimistic comments. It says a lot more about you than Courtney.
biggest problem for men is to even find a possible partner and meeting girls today is mission impossible. you rarely find single good women, they either taken or jumps from one relationship to another so the compettion is very high. i havent encountered any possible partner through work,hobbys and social activitys the last 5 years and it seems like the one you maybe feel is right , they dont find you attractive enough. so the game is so hard that many just gives up and follow their reachable dreams like , career , hobbys and life goals . no reason to wait and hope for the best. live life and see what comes around.
I'm married and old, so I'm not looking, but this doesn't seem like a problem at all to me....women are everywhere and many seem available. I think many men's "standards" may be too high.
@@garypierce7380💯
@@garypierce7380 that’s laughable, have you even been paying attention? There has always been low tier men, but these men were never an option to begin with.
We have a new phenomenon where women’s partner selecting strategy is openly unchecked, encouraged, applauded, and is the mainstream narrative. Where men’s is now considered “bad”, we used to have similar status people pair off with one another, for example an average man with an average woman. But since women’s “segsual” liberation we now have low tier, average and high tier women all demanding higher tier men (and getting them)
This has led to a situation where the significant majority of men are left with zero prospects of a partner, and the top tier men getting access to almost all of the women. The average man is no longer good enough for the average woman.
This is why ours marriage, birth, and dating rates have been dropping like a rock for the past 50 years.
How do you not know this by now?
You're married and old so trust me when I say you have no idea what you're talking about.
@@garypierce7380 just because they look available doesnt mean they are worthy, thats the problem nowadayas, they aren't
How to Stand Out to Women in 2025
1. Take Initiative
Plan thoughtful dates, follow up, communicate clearly, and be consistent.
2. Improve Appearance
Maintain grooming, dress well, and choose a signature scent.
3. Be Mysterious
Share authentically but pace disclosures to maintain intrigue.
4. Be Well-Rounded
Cultivate hobbies, stay curious, and engage in meaningful conversations.
5. Build Confidence Through Action
Achieve goals, step out of your comfort zone, and lead decisively.
6. Master Emotional Intelligence
Be attentive, adapt to social cues, and create meaningful connections.
7. Focus on Connection
Prioritize making her feel valued over trying to impress.
Have a merry Christmas Courtney
Your advice on style has often picked up my game, I think I know and think we all believe that, but do we
'Fool me once, shame on you.
Fool me twice, shame on me.'
#4 has resonated with me the most. I am trying so hard NOT to over share, so it’s helped me so much.
Thanks Courtney. The tip that resonated the most was to focus on making a connection on the date- not impressing. The connection itself will make an impression!
You know, its nice that Mrs Courtney always had a little faiths in us normal guys, and that's what I appreciates about her.
Thanks Courtney. I've been watching your videos for well over a year now. Even took your advice on fragrances and bought the Guerlain L'Homme. Great suggestion 👍. LOTS of compliments.
Oh, and Merry Christmas 🎄🎁😊
Excellent principles. Love this episode. Thanks, Courtney.
Courtney Is a Gem of a Woman! Thanks for your Vids, they have helped me out a lot.
I think we can also add another must have to the list. Personally, I'd wish that in 2025, men would be more granular about their mission in life and what they want to achieve in the world. In this way, they will also discover whether or not they actually want a life partner. They would subsequently be able to define what type of women best to partner with, to go on that mission with, and would stop chasing women for unhelpful reasons, and without any strategy.
It's about optimising for a quality partner without having to go on a billion unnecessary and unhelpful dates.
Once you know what path you want to walk, and you start walking it, its easy to see who is walking along that path beside you.
Thanks for sharing guidance to people! Keep up the hard work and Merry Christmas, Courtney!
You aren't wrong and your advice seems reasonable.
Only after decades of no success at all after trying everything over and over.. it is difficult to stay positive (i'm 45 and the most success so far was 2 dates with the same woman)
I am glad I'm ready in 2025 because next year I will be working on myself during Christmas & hopefully get more dates with bright intelligent women again. It has been a very unsuccessful year for me with no public dating going on at all
I clearly standout to women yet few are of any interest to me. It’s a game in which I choose not to play.
It’s the place and time where this occurs which really matters. Had plenty of attention at the club, not the place to meet..
i love your emotions when you speak
I actually love these tips. I started following these about 6 months ago and have been getting results.
taking initiative and building unshakeable confidence. is what stood out to me and what i plan on bettering in 2025.
As someone who went on three dates with the same woman in the last month, my advice is this: focus on getting to know each other and stay positive. For me, this worked extremely well because it gave me a chance to reflect more on what I want from a romantic relationship. I may still be single, and that's okay, because I'm proud and thankful for what I've learned and experienced recently, and I feel ready and encouraged to continue dating in the coming year!
Haha
That's not exactly a stand out resume to be giving advice
If you’re still single after going on 3 dates with the same woman, what exactly are you hoping for?
*munches popcorn*
I don't get why people even bother anymore.
But the show is great to watch.
Men and women want each other, and we were designed to be together. No amount of social engineering, cynicism, bitterness, and nihilism can change human nature.
@@Guigley Maybe but it is quite effective though. With how few young men even want to bother these days.
And not that women notice...but that is another story.
Yeah biologically we are attracted to each other, that is over 90%. Some are wired different. But with how things are done and expected these days I can see how whole generations are just giving up on it.
And at this point I am not even sure if it can be fixed. Oh well. Popcorn is delicious.
Maybe do a video on guys showing interest and appreciation without pedalstalizing women?
The burden is always placed on the guy, who is always expected to make the first move. To me, this pedestalizes women.
This needs to stop. Let there be equal and shared dialogue, risks, and burdens right from the start.
Guys can approach, act, and react accordingly if they know the girls reaction mistakes.
I hope this makes sense.
How to stand out, same as any other year.
Be tall, handsome, rich, mysterious, highly educated, a comedian, adventurous, kind, forgiving etc.
For most women a guy has to have it all
Good video! I learned something! Thanks for sharing!
I think the idea her is just to live your best life in 2025, and take the opportunities when presented. I think that I possess many of these qualities, I just need to get out of my comfort zone and actually talk ;;to more people, women included. To that end I am going to call tomorrow and ask the company setting up a speed dating event in my town what the age groups for the event are. Aa long as the ages aren't too much lower than mine I am going to get a ticket even though it terrifies me. Merry Christmas to all and don't give up hope, success comes when you least expect it.
Here's what you'll need: A good eye area, a chiseled jawline, a compact midface, high-set and prominent cheekbones, etc.
Just have 10 mln and own a house
More to add, these are features sub5s usually have:
-Bald
-Rounded cheeks due to being overweight
-Acne Scarring
-Non-Existent Eyebrows
Eyes:
-Buldging Prey eyes with too much upper eyelid exposure, the opposite of hunter eyes
-Bug Eyes
-Negative Canthal Tilt (which ofc leads to prey eyes)
Midface:
-Long horsefaces
-Recessed and underdeveloped midfaces
-Low-Set cheekbones
Jaw
-Recessed and Asymmetrical Jawlines
-Rounded w/ loose hyroid skin
-Overly narrow
Courtney, your advice is good and has genuinely helped to improve my life dramatically. Still single though. There's some secret beyond having all your shit together.
Wave cash, Lots of it. You'll be swamped by women in no time.
1) Taking initiative: I'm not doing that unless we have a relationship already established. I'm not an idiot.
2) Physical care/fashion: I'm already doing it and apparently that's bare minimum since it didn't change anything.
3) Being mysterious: I don't talk about myself that much but this also made some girls be afraid of me for some reason. Do they want to discover me or do I have to reveal myself more? Make up your mind!
4) Being well-rounded: I did this through my entire childhood, and not the girls I've met. They should measure up instead of asking, asking and asking.
5) Confidence through action: I can be quite confident in my workplace. Not just girls, everyone trusts in what I do. Again, this doesn't take me anywhere. Also, what exactly is it to girls if I tackle some challenges? I do them for myself. How does a girl (or anyone) benefit from me learning Tagalog for example? I'm not going to speak Tagalog in my daily routine.
This part reminds me of women's tendency of waiting at the finish line of a parkour and picking the winner guy for themselves, instead of running alongside him. Which I find ABSOLUTELY UNATTRACTIVE in a woman.
6) Emotional intelligence: I'll give credit for this since I'm recovering from a years long depression. However, my 4 years younger brother went through the same and he has a 3-years old and still going relationship (they met through Discord) while I am still alone.
Courtney. It seems to me that your advices are getting stale. Either come up with a new solution or stop giving us false hope. But why the heck I am giving lecture to someone who's still getting sponsorship from shady companies like BetterHelp is beyond me.
@@ibosu3190 BRO, JUST WIN THE LOTTO PROBLEM SOLVED
In order to get the women you first need to earn the respect from the other people around you through personal accomplishments/achievements. How do you do that? By being above average in as many ways as possible than most everyday guys. Remember that women only like bold-looking, influential guys with style and personality. I'll give you a random example: When you're at a bar and you see someone smoking a cuban cigar while you smoke a common cheap cigarette who do you think women will like more, you or him? Another example: If you're at a bar where 98% of guys order a coffee or a hot chocolate to drink while you order 2-3 glasses of whisky who do you think women will like more, them or you? All I'm trying to tell you is that you have to stand out from the crowd in as many ways as possible. Yet another example: Most guys have shaved, baby-like faces so when you have a manly moustache who do you think women will like more, them or you? You get what I'm saying? Another example: When others wear common cheap shoes while you wear a badass pair of cowboy boots who do you think women will like more, them or you? You get it now?
Many women say that they want an honest, mysterious man! How's that contradiction possible to achieve!
You've somehow been hurt, and it's giving you a bad attitude. Having a bad attitude is going to hamper your efforts to find a loving partner.
But I can tell you from my own very recent experience that what Courtney is saying is true. I discovered a lot of these things on my own over time. Not all of what she says is easy to adopt for many of us, myself included. But I worked hard and overcame things.
@@Makris_Amaliada9311
What you mention - cigars, drinks, shoes - are all superficial. I can tell you from personal experience that you DO NOT need to stand out from the crowd because of what you smoke, drink or wear, or how tall you are or how rich you are. The women that do care about those things are the women not worth being with - they'll dump you as soon as you don't meet those shallow expectations. It's not what's outside you that counts, it's what's inside. I know it sounds like BS, but it's true. Despite your best efforts, you'll end up meeting women that you absolutely don't click with. Some dates could even be disasters. But it only takes one success...
If you're authentic, humble and put your emphasis on her - assuming she's also an authentic, humble person who puts her emphasis on you - you'll do brilliantly. I'm SO lucky because I recently began dating a woman just like that. She's sexy, beautiful, intelligent (and highly educated, unlike me), warm and loving. It's still sometimes hard for me to believe a woman like that could be attracted to me, but sure enough, that's the situation.
Well, just to follow through the video.. my goals for 2025:
1. Find myself a job
2. Work on myself (want to start going to the gym and also improve myself by learning some new skills)
3. Whatever happens next, happens. Unfortunately, this year i went on a date with someone not trying to rush into it but be slightly passive and it backfired in my face and it was doing my head in. A lesson learned and an experience to use for future dates, if that happens.
But once i tick off the first 2 of my list, then i work on taking initiative and hopefully finiding someone that wishes to be with me, even with all my faults.
Big issue with men opening up is that "many times" when they do it's wesponized against them later.
Almost always. Yet when we share this experience, women degrade us and gaslight us into thinking we choose the wrong woman. It is sick. They literally do what they say other women don't. Lol.
Open up slowly (advice I don't always follow, but women seem to be okay with it), and realize that if the woman does use it against you she's not worth your time and attention anyway, as much as it might hurt.
Bingo
@@davidabarak We are telling you we have done it with dozens of women and *most* use it against men. And you shame us by gaslighting us into believing it is us choosing wrong.
Or, this is a habit we noticed.
Look, men are just as pathetic. But at least I admit it.
Definite on the fragrance side. Had a very lovely young lady ask me last Monday about the cologne I was wearing. Then on Saturday had another lady say to me that she could spend the entire day just standing beside me enjoying my cologne.
I wear Polo by Ralph Lauren and have done so for the past 45 years!!
I wear obsession by Calvin Klein and have done so for quite a while. Might have to try something new
Thanks Courtney, I´m from Mexico and I´m learning a lot from you. Pd. I really like your voice
5:46 This is my fundamental problem with dating. I don't want intrigue, curiosity, excitement, etc, from a relationship. I don't want to date a girl that I have to "discover" new things about all the time and be surprised and excited by new things. I want us to primarily be excited by and discover new things about the world together, not necessarily about each other so much, though that would happen too over time, but for me that should be secondary or even tertiary... Not an active priority.
I want to date a woman who (it feels like) I've known since middle school.
I just focus on my well-being and be direct, upfront, and honest with the ladies who are interested in me first.
I'm standing out by being myself. I know what I like, and I don't care what anyone says.
Everytime I put on a suit and tie Women can’t take their eye off me. ( Suit with White shirt, 100% Silk tie , Dress shoes or Cowboy boots )……Try it. It Works……Women like NICE things….And Shave and Get a Hair Cut too.
Could going outside be something we should all practice in 2025
😂
And what should i do outside? Talking to random strangers which will say GTFO?
Things that I've been doing include: lift at least 3 days per week, and doing online school to upgrade my skills
Hello from Canada! 🇨🇦
I don't say this to be mean, I find your content wonderful or I wouldn't be here. I wish more were as optimistically impassionate as you.
However, we should always call out something wrong when it is wrong. Men don't feel the market (dating world) is competitive. We know it is the opposite. There is no competition, and instead it has become a monopoly. We know the top get to share the women, as well as the bottom. In the middle, those are the forgotten ones. Boring men that can't stand out. Which is the majority of men, and in fact the majority of people. That is the first of many problems in this video. But if that cannot be understood, then men are not understood.
_"We know the top get to share the women..."_
I disagree. My dating life as a short guy with gray and white hair (what's left of it) and moderately adequate bank account has been pretty darned good, and it looks like I'm now entering into a relationship with a woman who I would have considered way out of my league - beautiful, sexy, intelligent, loving, fun. By traditional standards, I'm not at the top of the male food chain. In terms of superficial traits - looks and money - I'm definitely "Mr. Middle of the Bell Curve." For about a decade, I had a hard time asking women out, and in that time I think I went on one date. None of that was the fault of women.
However, I worked on building my self esteem, and I realized that being turned down by someone I asked out on a date wasn't the end of the world. There are guys out there who are obese, very short, completely bald, poor, sick, whatever, yet they manage find find women to love and who love them. It's all about how you make the other person feel. Do you make them feel interesting? Do you make them feel appreciated? Do you make them feel attractive (without being obnoxious)? Do you make them feel comfortable around you?
All the guys out there who think they can't find a woman are wrong. Period. (And the same goes for women who think they can't find a good man, or men and men or women and women).
@@davidabarakAs a 45 year old man without any dating success at all: not for everyone unfortunately. Some of us stay single
Not true at all. Dump the Tramp apps....you don't want any of those women. Shop for a real woman.
@@davidabarak
A few things I should point out. Unless you are dating 18-39, your topic on this was irrelevant. We are talking about more than just 45+, or when our hair turns grey or white (I am 41 and date 32 to 42). This is because you cannot speak on the younger generation as though you know them, and that is their age.
But let's go over you personally/looks just from what I can tell, vs the average man. Personality-wise you were average, you never initiated, seemed awkward, only went on one date. That's about 80% of men and for most men, a tremendous change to make. Now, you have charisma to an exceptional level. Yes, you do. Not because you are super charismatic but because most men have such a dearth of it. You are also moderately financially successful, ie., very above average. Physically, you are at an age this doesn't matter. It used to. Now it doesn't. So I can't say you are average there or above average. Of course you might be dating 18-30 year olds, so if you are I stand corrected. You just don't seem like that type of guy.
But overall, you are exceptional, and just believe you are average because men are led to believe they are less than what they are. In no way what you shared about yourself gives off average impressions.
You need to get off the dating apps and meet women offline, through fitness, hobbies and interests.
Yeah these lists always make me feel like I must be WAY ahead of the curve for the most part. Kind of crazy that somebody needs to be told to not be on their phone when they are hanging out with someone, especially on a date.
Thanks, Courtney! ❤
Happy holidays.💜
You too! ❤️
@ nice watch, thank you.
Good advice on being authentic:)
Most of this falls within the tight-rope walking category of being 'reserved' as a person. How successful that is all depends on the other person. If they are at all interested in you AND do not mind being a little investigative (and ultimately invested) in a relationship, it works. On the other hand, if they are easily frustrated by what they see as 'work, or are quickly bored and make up their mind within a short span of time... It won't.
Ive seen and heard of ppl hooking up for a long time because of close/same birthdays, same last names too. Seems to be a new trend ppl are starting. Don't forget about that, I feel thats why I never found my one while everyone else has because of some stupid dumb luck.
Be over 6 foot
Muscular build
Make 100k
The 3 sixes - six feet, six pack, six figures.
But what if this is coupled with a sub5 face (about a 3 or below, something I might be)
At this point: the problem isn't being attractive to women, it's finding women that care as much about being lady-like as Courtney. Women aren't culturally embracing "a woman's comfort" the way that prior centuries have. They'd be called "sell-outs" by their fellow sisters for such gestures of respect... :/
I don't think women have been taught how to be romantically attractive for at least two generations, only how to be sexually attractive.
For the women to stand out:
Try out things men enjoy doing and not everything is dirty or physically demanding.
STOP listening to 2 faced women who don’t listen to or talk to real men and not an asshole
I'd be really interested in seeing a video with your thoughts on Date Me Docs. The name is cringingly terrible but I personally think the concept is great. Frontloading the important things about you and what you're looking for in a charming way, so people feel more inclined to really try to get to know you, because what they've already read was so engaging or intriguing. I feel like it does contradict your advice about oversharing a bit, but I think as long as you aren't trauma dumping, then I think it's good, although there is a fine line.
Another recommendation is I would love to find some positive non toxic places where a guy could get constructive criticism and opinions regarding his dating profile. So much of the internet is just so negative or outright toxic or filled with trolls, I can't even seem to find anywhere with a healthy community to discuss those kinds of things.
I am 65, and after my 20-year marriage ended, I tried a bit of online dating. I tend to have the most luck in real life. Just meeting folks naturally. So my input would be don't rely on the dating profiles and just rely on meeting people.
Anyone who thinks negatively repels everyone. No one wants to be with that kind of person. He probably complains, looks like garbage, and isn't trying consistently to become a btter version of himself. Has too much free time, and is the most selfish person. The best way to be attractive, be a man, not a boy. Dont get your feelings in a bunch. Be bold, and make your move, be willing to move on, and always strive to become better. Regardless of what girls/women are, accept them for who they are. Be willing to always walk away when they dont get on your program/frame. There's no use in chasing someone who doesn't even like you for you. In the end she will disrespect you, and that humility for a man is the worse feeling ever.
Great advice, I have a different opinion on hobbies though. Hobbies seem like mostly a waste of time. A man’s top priorities should be his career, his health, and his relationships (friendships, romantic, family). Hobbies for the sake of pleasure are taking time and energy away from those three core values. Like the man who spends 3 hours/week on playing guitar or whatever is going to fall behind the man who puts that time towards improving their health, career, and relationships.
As someone with ADHD these tips are just 5 times as hard to try to implement. The social side of advice I should say
Want to stand out, don’t play their games. If she doesn’t want a relationship let her be single.
It's important for men to learn not to try to push to be in a relationship straight away, it's important to continue to go on dates with her and see what she's like before trying to go straight in to a relationship. Some people can rush this bit, and it can put some people off.
I don't know man, at 38 and starting over after 11 and half years, I'm thinking it might just be time to check out.
For anyone trying to stand out in the new year, I’m giving you all of my positive vibes. Let’s make it your year. You got this!
For the women:
Also, stop wearing pajamas outside. I don’t.
Try listening to us as much as we do our best to listen to your out loud thinking.
STOP confusing us with what you want to do
I stand out because I dress according to Courtneys specifications. As far as wardrobe goes, I'm a slightly older version of Teddy.
Hi Caleb. I'm not trying to be insulting or dismissive. I know it's not easy, but anything worthwhile usually isn't.
I think women are women the world over.
The advice seems really good. Let's give it a go. No good comes from giving up 🏆
Nice name you've got 🙃
Does taking initiative also include approaching women in person rather than online? This is perhaps the biggest thing a guy can do to stand out since most men are too timid to risk upfront rejection.
I would say make yourself look as presentable as possible, but don't take it over the top by peacocking because she'll know if you're being inauthentic. And she'll know your true fashion sense eventually if the relationship lasts, so there's no point in dressing purely for the sake of impressing others.
Yeah, anyone who goes out of their way to share every minute detail of their personal life comes off as desperate and needy, men and women alike. It subconsciously signals that the person is fishing for attention and validation.
Striving to be a well-rounded person should apply to both sexes, but women can obviously rely more heavily on their looks in the absence of other qualities. Although long-term relationships typically require more than just surface-level attraction.
Yeah, there's two basic types of people in this world: those who talk about aspiring to achieve something and those who actively work on trying to achieve them.
Women in general have better social acuity than men, and I think for many of us guys, it's something that we can only learn with experience. These soft skills don't come to us as naturally, especially now when we're having less in-person interactions.
Some very good points made in this video but i ask what is the point of men even trying when quite clearly women just take the piss when it comes to guys trying to stand out. There are no decent woman out there worth bothering with.
Happy Holidays, Courtney and happy late birthday 🎂 ❤
Thanks John! Happy holidays to you too ❤️
@@CourtneyRyanThanks Courtney! Sending love from Miami, Florida ❤️
Standing out DOES mean we need to be perfect in today's dating world.
Taking initiative doesn't mean anything if you're not perfect in the eyes of the woman you approach. Some men want to be passive and want women to take initiative and ask them out. I know there are other men who want women to approach them.
Prioritizing physical presentation means we DO need to look like a model. Many attractive men still get rejected when they approach women. I'm attractive, I dress well, and I keep my body healthy. Women never say yes when I ask them out and that could mean I'm not good enough in their eyes.
Being mysterious only works if you look like a model. Women ask me for my social media account when I ask them out. Some women want to judge men by what they share on social media. What someone puts on their social media account could be a lie.
You can be the most well-rounded man in the world. It won't mean anything if you don't get a chance to show you are well-rounded. If a woman isn't attracted to you then you won't get a first date to show how special you are.
Being confident through action depends on how women perceive you. I'm confident and I approach women with confidence. Women never give me a chance. Confidence only matters if she's attracted to you.
A lot of men haven't mastered emotional intelligence and they get attention from a lot of women because they are rich or very attractive. Women will complain about these men and ask "where are all the good men?" They are ignoring the good men because they're not attracted to them.
Do I look like a model? I'm guessing the answer is "no." (Sure, looks play a part in romance, but it's not as big a part as you think.) Despite being an aging, slightly balding, out of shape guy with a very modest bank account, I managed to form a loving, growing relationship with a woman who's absolutely beautiful, inside and out. You just need to find the right woman, and that takes time and perseverance.
You think too much....stop all the obsessive negativity.
*"Many attractive men still get rejected when they approach women."*
Doesn't make any sense.. They wouldn't even need to approach women since they're attractive.
And this is coming from someone who used to be a truerateme user (and still do judge faces on there)
*" I'm attractive, I dress well, and I keep my body healthy. Women never say yes when I ask them out and that could mean I'm not good enough in their eyes."*
Well, what features do you have in the face that are objectively attractive? (Such as Positive Canthal Tilt, thick eyebrows, colored eyes, square shaped hairline, etc.)
Good tips, but it’s a lot. I’ll be working up to this slowly…VERY slowly
As a guy doing all this and still getting stood up is nasty work
@courtneyryan What are we supposed to do when it seems like we are pretty much doing all the right things that you talk about all the time, and yet no women will even consider a date with you? This seems to be a huge issue where I am. The women in my social circles want to be married so badly, but simply will not say yes to a date with anyone who isn’t a perfect person. I know tons of guys who have everything going for them, and no one will give them the time of day.
I try to avoid pointing fingers at the other gender as much as possible, because I know it’s best to focus on what you can control. But it seems no matter what angle I look at it from, there’s no way for me to get around recognizing that (most) women have collectively adopted such a harsh, hypercritical attitude towards men and are greatly hindering the dating scene.
I just got ULINE trucker pants with hi-vis rings around the legs. With you fashion expertese, Courtney, how well will I stand out to women, 🙃?
Put the Hi-Viz rings around your -_-_, hopefully it stands out!😂
The fragrance is going to be a wonderful Christmas gift 😂
Heard about this expensive men's fragrance called Gravite cologne trying it out heard women like it...
They have to like you for any of this to even work. I'm oblivious and probably won't even know if they see me more than a friend.
She said she would...
Men, there's a very simple way to decrease your loneliness - increase your usefulness.
Definition of usefulness: the quality or fact of being useful
Definition of useful: able to be *USED* for a practical purpose or in several ways [emphasis via capitalization and bold highlight added]
You can further decrease your loneliness by expecting less in return; if you give 4x more than what you get back, you will be twice as 'lonely' as someone who gives 8x more than they get back, and half as 'lonely' as someone who gives 2x more than they get back.
All you guys here should remember that what Courtney is talking about is what _you_ can do to make yourself more attractive. What she's saying isn't going to change shallow women, and it's not intended to. So please don't blame women as a whole by saying they're only interested in money and looks. There are women for whom that doesn't matter. And be honest with yourselves - are you going to date someone you're not attracted to, whether physically or otherwise? Are you shallow if you're not attracted to a woman who's not what you're looking for?
Most women aren't looking for guys like you... or like me. But someone out there is, so you might as well do what it takes to improve the odds. It doesn't mean making yourself into someone you're not, it means improving who you already are.
"someone out there is" but if it takes an unreasonable amount of effort to find one shitty person why bother
@@ohjay7612 Exactly, so you may want to stop dating. It's not worth your time.
Although my sense of purpose is about myself, and how to connect to benefit the community - standing out, without a doubt, can have a far greater impact for the good life to sprout. Your words are those of a sabi girl, because sabi means wise, and you give that energy to rise, and fly as high as the sky. Your ‘sability’ makes you A youtube Star, and gives a vibe that can make one stand out in life and go far, like Sabi Girl Ayra Starr. See Honda Stage | Live Performance by Ayra Starr - Sability
See I know I’m attractive physically to women cause they check me out and ask me how I’ve been like I don’t come here everyday. Then I try to slide in the dms and it’s like a slip and slide made out of sand paper. It doesn’t go anywhere if anything the last thing she says before she blocks me is SIRRR THAT IS ENOUGH.
Why do some dudes flash their nipples on their pfp and get all the pun, but I say something slightly perverse, and it’s Oh how dare you, you peasant.
You know how you really stand out to most women guys? Not be fat, make sure you’re at least slightly nice to look at, make more money and at least be 6 ft. Not all but this is what most women these days fellas.. oh yeah and make sure you pay for everything.. very important!🤦♂️🤷♂️
My signature cologne: Michael Kors. Used to be Cool Water.
Stay away from trendy, new school brands such as the one you mentioned. Instead, get a Floris London perfume.
@Makris_Amaliada9311 New School brands? How old do you think I am? And I will wear what I want.
@@MrTJMaddox Avoid brands with less than 100 years of history. Michael Kors is a new school brand.
@@Makris_Amaliada9311 🤣🤣🤣
@@MrTJMaddox What are you laughing at? Dress bold and act like a man. If you dress and act like a kid then of course women will not like you. Wear a suit, not a t-shirt. Wear boots, not casual shoes. You have to stand out from the crowd in order for women to like you.
It's all about standing out from the crowd. Most people (or should I say "sheeple") are too dumb to realise that. We live in an evil world where you have to be strong to survive, if you're weak and pathetic others will take advantage of you and rightfully so. Appearance is the first thing we all look in others, so if you look like a turd with legs you should not wonder why you're still single. Now, how does one stand out from the crowd? Self-improvement is the answer, improving yourself in all possible ways, both externally and internally, every change - be it small or big - matters and brings you closer and closer to the man you're dreaming of becoming. A man of high value is a strong man that is independent, takes care of himself and is able to provide for a woman to make her feel safe in his (veiny) arms. As a man you have to be a badass and you owe to establish a fearsome image so others will know not to mess with you at the first glance, so level up and stop crying or stay average forever. Most women interact with tens (if not hundreds) of guys in daily basis and for as long as you look like a commoner just like the rest of them women won't want to even spit on you. I'll give you a random example: Let's say that you're at a small local bar where most guys smoke cheap cigarettes and dress like immature teenagers wearing hoodies but you take out a Cuban cigar from a leather case and light it up with an S. T. Dupont lighter, plus having a manly moustache and wearing a bespoke suit, guess who'll the waitress notice!
Courtney is out here uploading videos from the future while us regular peasants are stuck in 2024
Another great video.👍👍🇨🇦 I wish you all the best this holiday season
There tips work for men the women are slightly attracted too. If she thinks you're a sloppy mess you have no chance. Stay fit my fellas
If a woman doesnt find u physically attractive she won't even waste her time.
Just be above 6'3" (varies a bit by country but not much) and get a great haircut ($50). If you want a broader net, wear some tacky jewelry item like a bead bracelet or woven leather necklace.
Most women will say there are 3 things that make a man stand out to them. 6ft+ tall, loaded with money, and have a high status.
Stand up! yes sir
😎 What Woman Have To Offer🤔
Wear black shiny ✨ leggings they’ll either think it’s weird or funny either way you’ll stand out ! 😂😂
Happy Sunday Courteney ❤
You too! 🥰
Fellow viewers and Courtney, may you all have a Merry Christmas and Happy Holiday!
You too! ❤️
Make a reservation for a restaurant, even there are never more than 5 people any time of the day. It is so dumb, but works on a woman. Then walk in together and say that you have a reservation.
The brutal realization... That even Cuffem (the streamer who lost 50k just for his looks alone) mogs me
Anne they should stand out to us