Dating Disappointments: Why You’re Closer to Love Than You Think

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  • Опубліковано 22 гру 2024

КОМЕНТАРІ • 102

  • @garetht1236
    @garetht1236 12 годин тому +38

    Definitely a voice I needed after my relationship ended and I'm going through the cycles of grief. I think a quote from Keanu Reeves is also helpful for anyone who needs it: "it's ok to fight for someone who loves you, it's not ok to fight for someone to love you"

    • @vylet2292
      @vylet2292 10 годин тому

      Omg, thank you. Just caught my bf of 3.5 ys cheating with another girl 2 days ago n today's my bday 🤦‍♀️

    • @jacintahearn
      @jacintahearn 9 годин тому

      Love that line x

    • @iamjojoandtoristan643
      @iamjojoandtoristan643 2 години тому +1

      @@vylet2292I’m so sorry to hear that ): you deserve so much better. And happy birthday ❤

    • @abbeycorbett2099
      @abbeycorbett2099 Годину тому

      @@vylet2292happy birthday! Sounds like he gave you the best gift - cutting him out of your life so you are now free to go find the right one! I know it doesn’t feel like that in this moment though. Keep your head up! ❤

  • @anastazjamalczyk7683
    @anastazjamalczyk7683 13 годин тому +16

    Much needed message for the holiday season and the end of the year when we take stock of our life, including our love life and we end it as we started it, single. For me, Ive had two situationships and heartbreak throughout the course of this year and it's not easy to stay hopeful but love IS out there and I choose to stay expectant. And in the meantime my family, friends, pets, even random strangers are getting it. Because love is so much greater than we make it, focusing only on its romantic asoect. I realise everyone wants to find their person, but Im so thankful we're also able to give and receive love in other ways. Happy Christmas everyone here, Matthew, Audrey and the team and my best wishes for the new year ❤

    • @SuperBlahblahrawr
      @SuperBlahblahrawr 37 хвилин тому

      This comment is exactly what I needed to hear. Thanks for the reminder ❤

  • @fireflythinking1290
    @fireflythinking1290 13 годин тому +14

    This video comes at the right moment... I'm so sick of the men I stumble upon being bad at communication, lying and just being cowards when it comes to having real discussions about issues.

  • @kellycw4772
    @kellycw4772 10 годин тому +9

    It won’t be that you found love because you’re excessively dating. It will be that you found love because you’re openly living! Sound advice throughout.

  • @ShopgirlNY182
    @ShopgirlNY182 10 годин тому +20

    Sending love and hugs to anyone feeling alone, sad, heartbroken, lonely or just not feeling as happy as you would like to be. You are amazing. You are loved and you will be ok. 🫶🏻

  • @atty.veronicainoturanosg3487
    @atty.veronicainoturanosg3487 14 годин тому +30

    Whenever others tell me to stop having trust issues, I retort back why can't people just be honest 😒

    • @MS-ns4ki
      @MS-ns4ki 9 годин тому +3

      I dated a man for I don’t know. I don’t know maybe nine months and he was clearly trying to date other people behind my back the entire time so I’m done.

  • @ReemA-it7oi
    @ReemA-it7oi 10 годин тому +5

    i appreciate that your advice is not just about dating - but can be applicable to leading to a great life in general. thank you

  • @lellod
    @lellod 13 годин тому +19

    It‘s veeeerrrrry difficult to surround yourself with “good stories” because over time you get excluded from them. You don’t fit to a lot of activities and become some kind of “danger” or “bad example” who they don’t want to be surrounded with. And as a result it becomes harder and harder - with time you have more and more single friends where you don’t even have the opportunity to meet someone new in a healthy environment… the older I get - the less Invitations I have to any occasions. And in a way I’m released that I don’t have to take part on another wedding without a partner - honestly although I know I’m a good one - by time I feel shame about my status. I’m frustrated because I cannot do something more and I’m in a state where is no solution. I can only wait & try to be hopeful.

    • @lauracamellini7999
      @lauracamellini7999 13 годин тому +7

      If people make you feel ashamed about who you are they're not your friends, I come from a very dysfunctional family and I can tell you, shame is the losing game of power dynamics, not friendship, if they value you they'll make you feel comfortable just as you are, otherwise it's better to be social in another place

    • @nikkyshamz2696
      @nikkyshamz2696 12 годин тому +1

      Take yourself out and make a new circle. You're not at the mercy of other people's decisions or behaviour.

    • @lellod
      @lellod 12 годин тому +1

      @ This is exactly what I already always do. But most of the times the “shame” is not based on any behavior of others towards me. In opposite - a lot of good friends are very sweet and try to include me everywhere they can and believe I would feel good. But even then - I have this feeling - not because of they did anything wrong. It’s internal - because every time I get reminded of my situation more and more in such situations. Example: Birthday’s: I went on Birthdays over a decade🙄🙄🙄 - and always taking part as a “single” is not comforting. I’m collected and would say also not “bad looking” - and I assume that over time even good people are asking themselves: Whyyyy? …
      And it’s naturally making me question and brings up self doubts. Thing’s happening out of control unwillingly can bring up the feeling of shame…

    • @lauracamellini7999
      @lauracamellini7999 11 годин тому +1

      ​@@lellodthe moment you'll start being curious about what's around you and stop focusing on yourself you'll know you're healing

  • @jaygarcia6079
    @jaygarcia6079 10 годин тому +8

    A string? I call it a line of failed relationships. So many toxic relationships or good relationships that ended in me being discarded/ghosted. Every time something is going right it ends. And when it’s going bad I let it drag out because I’m afraid it’ll never happen for me.

    • @susanparkes5096
      @susanparkes5096 6 годин тому

      A very long line, decades and decades of it. That line is only nearing the end because nobody lives for ever.

    • @abbeycorbett2099
      @abbeycorbett2099 Годину тому +1

      THIS. I feel this on such a deep level. I’m working on doing better to honor myself and not let ppl take advantage of me going forward. But it’s not just some magical light switch. It’s gonna take time.

  • @JoAnnCorley
    @JoAnnCorley 12 годин тому +2

    perfect timing after a week of disappointments… feeling exhausted… brilliant advice!! I need to recalibrate… knowing it will happen as I am living life! 👍👏🏼

  • @susanwhalls6230
    @susanwhalls6230 4 години тому +4

    Idk, dating in 40s, 50s & 60s is another animal. Everyone is carrying past trauma, lack of self awareness seems to be the norm. I don’t mind past trauma ( I have it too) it’s how they cope or don’t cope with it that’s the issue. Lack of self awareness seems to be the norm. It’s depressing. I finally just got a dog & he’s the best partner ever!

    • @abbeycorbett2099
      @abbeycorbett2099 Годину тому

      THIIIIIIS!!!! I turn 40 in a month and my god, the pool of truly eligible men out there is getting smaller and smaller. All the while, I’m dating losers and just picking up more baggage along the way. I really hope I find someone soon bc this rat race is utterly exhausting and very taxing.

  • @anonymousanonymous7208
    @anonymousanonymous7208 13 годин тому +3

    Glad to see this video! This is just what I needed to hear after reading a bunch of negative content on social media about finding love. Thank you for this.

  • @ATouchOfOrchestra
    @ATouchOfOrchestra 12 годин тому +1

    I really needed to hear the 8th point. I developed a crush on a colleague, and when I recently heard that she got engaged, it deeply hurt. My head started weaving stories about the future we might have had together. But as you rightly said, this is more of an ego bruise rather than a true tragedy of lost love. Thank you.

  • @Hopemylife
    @Hopemylife 11 годин тому +3

    Good that you recognised all the lonely people out there! Thx

  • @tassedaboukherroub8850
    @tassedaboukherroub8850 12 годин тому +1

    Thank you Matthew for the beautiful message of hope, faith and love ❤

  • @SFerCol
    @SFerCol 14 годин тому +7

    PLEASE!! Less of whats wrong and more of what is right! ❤❤❤

    • @susanparkes5096
      @susanparkes5096 7 годин тому

      Be a short topic then.

    • @SFerCol
      @SFerCol 3 години тому

      @@susanparkes5096there are SO MANY RIGHT THINGS about relationships!! Some people Just need to hear baput it more to be able to see it!

  • @HumanityRisingNow
    @HumanityRisingNow 7 годин тому

    Such wise words Matthew ❤ in particular about getting around people who are telling empowering stories aligned with what you want to create in your own life.

  • @Neet__aspiranttt2025
    @Neet__aspiranttt2025 9 годин тому +1

    This is so mature and positive ❤☺️ thanks sir 🙏

  • @Denise-oy7er
    @Denise-oy7er 37 хвилин тому

    Thank you for all you do and share. It really helps when things seem so muddled up

  • @Evangelia2024
    @Evangelia2024 10 годин тому

    Wow Matthew, I was in need of hearing these words today. I can't thank you enough 🙏

  • @DebraKirkpatrick-uz6pk
    @DebraKirkpatrick-uz6pk 8 годин тому +3

    I am 72 and still would enjoy a romantic relationship - my
    Husband died 12 years ago tried dating and no matches - several
    Nice guys but no depths or attraction to go deeper and obsessive experience with one man - I know he an avoidant attachment man I was very attracted to but was awful for me. Inconsistent and several times going pretty nicely then anti crazy anger, left and blocked
    me. Took him back several times then repeated. Crazy-making indeed. Then he friend-zoned ME! I tried friend shit and terrible for me. Trying to move on. On dating site again and nothing. Scammers abound. Yes, giving up & feeling kinda sad but working on my spiritual growth and family and friends that are true blue. What say you?

  • @PeaceInChrist23
    @PeaceInChrist23 12 годин тому +1

    The guy I liked ego is bigger than anyone I've ever met. That's saying something. I made the right decision to walk away. Good advice though. Thanks.

  • @liamhall7027
    @liamhall7027 10 годин тому +1

    Even though your darkest days, your fire burns, always ❤️

  • @HunterChadd-r8o
    @HunterChadd-r8o 14 годин тому +10

    I'm lonely not the only one in this journey!!!! Lol

    • @zahradehghani8771
      @zahradehghani8771 11 годин тому

      I tell myself this too

    • @susanwhalls6230
      @susanwhalls6230 4 години тому

      Im not even lonely anymore, more like disgusted & disappointed with what seems to be out there..

  • @bindicat9070
    @bindicat9070 7 годин тому

    What a great video
    Have a great Christmas with Audrey.
    What a beautiful message
    I’m just doing life ❤

  • @judyb0216
    @judyb0216 5 годин тому

    Seven years of disappointments and loss. So much wasted time with situationships. Men come back and choose me as a rebound. Waiting for your person can be lonely but someone who does not see your value cannot be valuable to you.

  • @JoAnnCorley
    @JoAnnCorley 12 годин тому +1

    You are an exceptional gift! ❤

  • @Fjdgh-c7j
    @Fjdgh-c7j 12 годин тому

    Merry Christmas 🎅🏻 🎄 & Thanks 🙏🏽 so much ❤

  • @TheSunshinefee
    @TheSunshinefee 7 годин тому +1

    single for two decades. the good ones are taken or only like me as a friend

  • @susanwhalls6230
    @susanwhalls6230 9 годин тому +3

    I’m so tired of men wanting to talk about sex constantly before even meeting. So over it. It’s disappointing talking to someone a few times on the phone & then having to move on because they can’t seem to ask any questions other than sex related.. & these are men in their 50s.. wtf such a turn off.

  • @krishnabrahma395
    @krishnabrahma395 8 годин тому

    Thanks a lot Mathew it helps. I'll be on a new journey

  • @pugsondrugs0161
    @pugsondrugs0161 8 годин тому +2

    Don’t give me that hope…

  • @SFerCol
    @SFerCol 13 годин тому +1

    How to feel good in any date for example!

  • @BohoDevi
    @BohoDevi 12 годин тому

    Thank you Matthew, my brother from another mother. Happy holidays and God bless you for giving us lonely hearts so much hope. May the new year bring in happiness and fulfill your goals❤ Love from 🇮🇳 India

  • @jedaze5
    @jedaze5 4 години тому

    thank you Matthew

  • @galina6707
    @galina6707 9 годин тому

    Great podcast! Useful information🙏👍 Thank you so much! Merry Christmas guys💙✨❄️✨

  • @JoeZiger
    @JoeZiger 12 годин тому

    Thanks for the video it's very helpful

  • @TexasGirl1984
    @TexasGirl1984 7 годин тому

    So good!

  • @lisarichey7029
    @lisarichey7029 6 годин тому

    I love you. I appreciate you.

  • @lindseyhunt3541
    @lindseyhunt3541 7 годин тому

    This too shall pass- if you are in a low moment in life❤️❤️❤️

  • @victoriacherrington9936
    @victoriacherrington9936 14 годин тому

    Thank you!!! ❤

  • @gri22lybear
    @gri22lybear 14 годин тому +11

    I haven’t given up hope on finding my Soulmate, but I feel hopeless! Everyone I know has someone and I’m 35 and not even close. 😔

  • @Andrea-lp4bb
    @Andrea-lp4bb 6 годин тому +1

    It's been 3 years since my abusive lying cheating addicted ex husband walked out. I'm 50. Have had 2 relationships with guys that were so unsuitable it was gross.
    I've seen many friends try for years to find someone. It just doesn't work. I've got more chance of winning Lotto

    • @susanwhalls6230
      @susanwhalls6230 4 години тому +1

      Dating in 40s-50s is a different animal. Matthew should do a show on that. Men & women have more demons & past trauma they carry with them. I don’t mind the past trauma (I have it too), it’s how they cope with it. Lack of self awareness and only wanting sex seems to be the norm from my experience anyway.

    • @Andrea-lp4bb
      @Andrea-lp4bb 4 години тому

      @susanwhalls6230 absolutely agree with you. And it would be brilliant if Matthew could do a show on dating in 40s & 50s. It's everything you describe. I have trauma too, like you describe, and I don't mind it in others either but it's all the other gunk that is such a nightmare

  • @astrid-w5z
    @astrid-w5z 6 годин тому

    18:38 took me out, very funny 😂😂😂

  • @karmalogik681
    @karmalogik681 8 годин тому +2

    I dont belive this kind of stuff anymore. I think all this peptalk to women to try again and again with promises of love somewhere down the line even though all it leads to is pain over and over. For me this marketing starting to look awfully a lot like a way for men to just keep get access to us leftover women... 🤷‍♀️

    • @susanparkes5096
      @susanparkes5096 6 годин тому +1

      Indeed, keep trying if it amuses you, but the odds of success are diminishing with every year older.

  • @tamaraharvey3569
    @tamaraharvey3569 13 годин тому +2

    I need to remember who I was

  • @naushinhusain5488
    @naushinhusain5488 7 годин тому

    haha love that little true crime moment :p

  • @helenhamidi
    @helenhamidi 10 годин тому

    I love your videoes❤

  • @PaulMcAnally-fz2pu
    @PaulMcAnally-fz2pu 6 годин тому

    13:14

  • @susanparkes5096
    @susanparkes5096 6 годин тому +1

    Can't 'go back' to liking people because most of them are actually pretty unlikeable.

  • @Yukajoseph
    @Yukajoseph 13 годин тому +37

    Amazing video A month ago, my partnership of five years came to an end. The choice to break up with the person I love is something that really gets to me. Even though it's all for nothing, I've done everything I can to get him back, and I couldn't imagine my existence without him. I've tried everything to stop thinking about him, but I still can't help but miss him and think about him often. I don't know why I am saying this here.

    • @QueenJessica-z5j
      @QueenJessica-z5j 13 годин тому

      Saying goodbye to someone you love is difficult; I know this from my 12-year relationship ending. But I was unable to simply let him go, so I made every effort to get him back. I eventually sought aid from a spiritual counselor, who was able to help me regain his affection.

    • @Yukajoseph
      @Yukajoseph 13 годин тому

      It's interesting! How can I contact a spiritual counselor most efficiently, and how did you find one?

    • @QueenJessica-z5j
      @QueenJessica-z5j 13 годин тому

      Father Obah Eze is a wonderful spiritual counselor who has the ability to bring back your ex.

    • @QueenJessica-z5j
      @QueenJessica-z5j 13 годин тому

      He can assist you; he is Father Obah Eze, and he possesses immense powers.

    • @Yukajoseph
      @Yukajoseph 13 годин тому

      I just sought him up online thanks to your helpful information. remarkable
      I just checked Father Obah Eze online, and he's really genuine. Thank you again ❤

  • @helenhamidi
    @helenhamidi 10 годин тому

  • @GregMunro
    @GregMunro 11 годин тому

    Cool video, My relationship of 5 years ended a month ago. The love of my life decided to leave me, I really love her so much I can’t stop thinking about her, I’ve tried my very best to get her back in my life, but to no avail, I’m frustrated, I don’t see my life with anyone else. I’ve done my best to get rid of the thoughts of her, but I can’t, I don’t know why I’m saying this here, I really miss her and just can’t stop thinking about her

    • @TrentReeves-c2k
      @TrentReeves-c2k 11 годин тому

      its difficult to let go of someone you love, i was in a similar situation, my relationship of 12 years ended, but i couldnt just let her go i did all i could to get her back, i had to seek the help of a spiritual counselor who helped me bring her back

    • @GregMunro
      @GregMunro 11 годин тому

      Amazing, how did you get a spiritual counselor, and how do i reach her?

    • @TrentReeves-c2k
      @TrentReeves-c2k 11 годин тому

      Shelly renee white , and she is a great spiritual counselor who can bring back your ex.

    • @GregMunro
      @GregMunro 11 годин тому

      Thank you for this valuable information, i just looked her up now online. impressive

  • @FilmStudent07
    @FilmStudent07 3 години тому