Funniest Military Fails... Part 6

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  • Опубліковано 17 гру 2024

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  • @rogerhack3750
    @rogerhack3750 6 місяців тому +15

    Them: what was it like in the army and specifically the infantry?
    Me: we were the fittest alcoholics imaginable.

  • @hasnoluck4181
    @hasnoluck4181 6 місяців тому +115

    "2:00 in the morning, everyone is black" -- proceeds to wear sunglasses

    • @Drowko
      @Drowko 6 місяців тому +1

      Everything hits harder at 2 in the morning.

    • @BuddyStevens-k8s
      @BuddyStevens-k8s 6 місяців тому +1

      @@Drowko even the black

  • @logicoverfeelz
    @logicoverfeelz 6 місяців тому +50

    3:17 "There's gonna be a day vets are called for again. Until then we wait patiently....... Just kidding, my knees gave out. Send help."

  • @carsonkouts
    @carsonkouts 6 місяців тому +42

    I was a crew chief in the 160th and I still remember bmq when we first did NVG training. Took us all out to an empty field and basically just hit us in the face with footballs until we learned to catch them 😂

    • @Yeet-mp6ci
      @Yeet-mp6ci 6 місяців тому

      I can’t catch a football anyways XD

    • @BirTek-93
      @BirTek-93 6 місяців тому +3

      That had to be hilarious😂.

    • @enderwiggin9303
      @enderwiggin9303 6 місяців тому +1

      Back in grade school in probably 92 the gaurd came and they backed out the gym and had us line up and try to shoot hoops with nods.. it was then that I realized I had no natural depth perception, I'd did equally bad if n9t a bit better lol

  • @JTW.12
    @JTW.12 6 місяців тому +9

    “Don’t worry about what my hand is doing” is crazy

  • @MisterMemeDude
    @MisterMemeDude 2 місяці тому +2

    Ortiz: "Any MOS other than infantry ain't shit!"
    *Also Ortiz: "Infantry was horrible, I hated it.."*

  • @gimpinainteasy
    @gimpinainteasy 6 місяців тому +10

    "It's 2am in the morning.. Everyone is Black.." I am sooo goone..

  • @Donkey-Butter223
    @Donkey-Butter223 6 місяців тому +21

    Nikko seems like he would such a fun guy to be around.

    • @BlueEyedColonizer
      @BlueEyedColonizer 6 місяців тому

      You must enjoy anal

    • @Ghost76Ninja
      @Ghost76Ninja 6 місяців тому

      Yeah if you like trying to be smashed all the time... wait what... totally right... fun guy!!;!

  • @Monkey_boyzz
    @Monkey_boyzz 6 місяців тому +67

    Low Hitler salute is wild

  • @Johnny1371-1
    @Johnny1371-1 6 місяців тому +2

    "Go be a parent" is the greatest thing ive heard today... i dont get out much anymore

  • @LiterallyThatGuyPal
    @LiterallyThatGuyPal 6 місяців тому +16

    The navy recruiter literally slid in my dms after I signed the paperwork at MEPS to go Marines, I told him I signed with the Marines, his answer: you fudged up

    • @diamond-dog-6412
      @diamond-dog-6412 6 місяців тому

      I still get marine recruiters calling me even though I signed army and one said “good”

    • @bruticus1496
      @bruticus1496 6 місяців тому +6

      I had a I think a army recruiter dm on fb asking if I was interested in joining and even sent a friend request. I politely declined due to being physically disabled and in a moterized wheelchair unless they could upgrade my chair and put a machine gun on the front

  • @reneeproffetta9295
    @reneeproffetta9295 6 місяців тому +55

    “Don’t worry about what my hand is doing” …😂
    “We definitely left that…that’s our bad”. Oopsie. 🤣🤣
    “The retired group” ☠️ 😂

    • @chaplaiin
      @chaplaiin 6 місяців тому

      we watched the same fucking video

    • @reneeproffetta9295
      @reneeproffetta9295 6 місяців тому

      Cool bruh, you alright? 🤣

    • @chaplaiin
      @chaplaiin 6 місяців тому

      @@reneeproffetta9295 why are you quoting the video for us 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

    • @reneeproffetta9295
      @reneeproffetta9295 6 місяців тому

      @@chaplaiinit’s called “reaction to funny jokes”….are you the comment police? Shall I bend over? 😂😂😂😂

    • @reneeproffetta9295
      @reneeproffetta9295 6 місяців тому

      It’s called “reaction to content”, I’m sorry dude I upset the comment police? Shall I put my hands behind my back and squat and cough? 😂 all my quotes WILL fall out, they may be sharp.

  • @ethanfury3368
    @ethanfury3368 6 місяців тому +9

    My gpa got drafted back in Vietnam for a combat roll and was a former gang member from the Bay Area, smacked his drill Sargent in basic and got LAYED out

    • @ethanfury3368
      @ethanfury3368 6 місяців тому +3

      Well more accurately talked back, raised his hand, and got layed out before he knew what was goin on

    • @itsjustme8947
      @itsjustme8947 6 місяців тому +1

      @@ethanfury3368 as is proper...

  • @tiktikboom2371
    @tiktikboom2371 6 місяців тому +3

    Lol that parenting line at the end was amazing.

  • @Swifttortoise4
    @Swifttortoise4 6 місяців тому +6

    0:56 that face just fits so well 😂😂😂

  • @Berm_Blaster
    @Berm_Blaster 6 місяців тому +2

    I'm convinced Nikko has his pistol sitting on his lap during every video lol

  • @brandonhaag52
    @brandonhaag52 5 місяців тому

    Just came back from a JRTC rotation in FT Johnson, LA, and I can attest that at 6:44 he is very accurate that NVG's are genuinely difficult to use at first. Especially when you have the ones that only go over one eye. you constantly have to adjust the single eye to see things clearly, and you need to adjust the zoom if you want to change from seeing things more than 10 ft away to closer than 10 ft away. And when it's pitch black you really only clearly see dark solid objects, so forget seeing all your paths through the brush you made during the day, you'll be finding a new way each time lol

  • @williamwolcott329
    @williamwolcott329 6 місяців тому +1

    Not military, but goddamn that first time NVG experience was spot on for me. Simultaneously amazed and frustrated.

  • @syxyman
    @syxyman 6 місяців тому +3

    Air Force recruiting slid into my DMs when I submitted an application to find a space force recruiter

  • @slayer100004
    @slayer100004 6 місяців тому +1

    All I was told when I got hurt was "take 2 Tylenol change your socks and call me in the morning"

  • @Tokio_Tsu
    @Tokio_Tsu 6 місяців тому +4

    When I was in OSUT for 12B, my drill got into a fistfight with another drill from a different platoon because he came into our bay and told us what to do, you could hear shit flying and being thrown around in CQ and all the other drills yelling, and my drill yelled. I quote "I don't give a fuck abound your combatives Chez."

  • @lisableichrodt2122
    @lisableichrodt2122 6 місяців тому +1

    Thanks!

  • @TTOS69
    @TTOS69 6 місяців тому +3

    0:16 "Baby, Grind with Me. Relax ya mind, take ya time with meee"

  • @iamunwanted701
    @iamunwanted701 6 місяців тому +1

    never had a recruiter in my dms but i did have one approach me when i was looking at fish in a petsmart. gotta give it to him he somehow got me looking at fish to then talking about the apache and how its cooler than any plane i wanted to fly

  • @SmokieMcShatter
    @SmokieMcShatter Місяць тому

    Those trash sailors were swabbing the poopdeck😂😂😂

  • @Pastel_Moon.
    @Pastel_Moon. 6 місяців тому +2

    With the ants trying going for a whole solid 1 minute and 10 seconds and I was not in the army. I was 5 and walked backwards into a fire ant mound, my whole entire body was covered.

  • @Darth-Nihilus1
    @Darth-Nihilus1 2 місяці тому

    Beef taco MRE is straight fire! 😂 I crapped my pants later that afternoon

  • @TributesCarlson-im4be
    @TributesCarlson-im4be 6 місяців тому +4

    Always a good day when Nikko post.
    Not a good day for these people Though 😂😂😂😂

  • @Dereinejunge178
    @Dereinejunge178 6 місяців тому +2

    Military fails Reallyyyyyy get NEVER old 😂🙏🏻🔥

  • @Ren.uk.99
    @Ren.uk.99 6 місяців тому

    So glad you saw that sniper snog finally, I saw it last week ago and first thought was Nikko would love this😂

  • @abranmartinez9444
    @abranmartinez9444 6 місяців тому

    Dude driving with nothing but nvgs is a whole different experience

  • @xdfraggs
    @xdfraggs 6 місяців тому +1

    The first time going night driving. I thought I went blind. Lol

  • @Daniel-san-86
    @Daniel-san-86 6 місяців тому

    5:23 broke my ankle in Iraq in 2008. We were 3 months into a 15 month deployment. They gave me motrin and returned to duty.
    When we finally redeployed 12 months later and i got to see an actual doctor, they took xrays. It was still broken.

  • @Yuukichan1888
    @Yuukichan1888 6 місяців тому +1

    Pole dancing with the branches

  • @calebhunter7685
    @calebhunter7685 6 місяців тому

    The recruiters reached out to me for like a year and a half after high school. They had a bench press booth at the fairgrounds, so I felt inclined to participate.

  • @Suss_loria
    @Suss_loria 6 місяців тому

    Hand in the anthill hits me personally 🤣

  • @BlaqueShot
    @BlaqueShot 6 місяців тому +2

    We love Nikko 🙏

  • @jaycobrcamelin
    @jaycobrcamelin 6 місяців тому

    6:47 You know I was going to say, was a little rough but not terrible, but you had a better explanation lol

  • @mccreek99
    @mccreek99 6 місяців тому

    i confirm the "flicky the gun in the air thing" is fun

  • @Drozzilla
    @Drozzilla 6 місяців тому

    Brother is counting these videos the same way my pull ups get counted "part 3... part 4... part 5... part 5..."

  • @SonySony-hb8vb
    @SonySony-hb8vb 6 місяців тому

    I don’t understand people who try to force people to stop cussing or other it’s your channel you can do whatever you want on the channel (love your videos keep up the good work)

  • @gubsty
    @gubsty 6 місяців тому +1

    earth backshots is crazy 0:10

  • @crazeddiesel
    @crazeddiesel Місяць тому

    0:47 I was at Benning during ranger school and we were doing flutter kicks. I was on an ant hill so I tried to move over. This RI comes over and sticks his tongue in the ant hill and then stuck his tongue out at me and ate them. He told me to get back to where I was….

  • @Ghostiisdum
    @Ghostiisdum 6 місяців тому

    calf raising ammunition boxes is wild

  • @Justin_Saves
    @Justin_Saves 6 місяців тому

    Ahaha! You're a wild man bro!
    🤘🤣🤘

  • @scorpiontale2528
    @scorpiontale2528 4 місяці тому

    Dislocated my knee cap in basic and got prescribed Tylenol

  • @iamthenatehawk1537
    @iamthenatehawk1537 6 місяців тому +1

    Imagine laying down scorching heat and you hate being there
    So a kitchen but you get to lay down 🙃

  • @tracyarzola6838
    @tracyarzola6838 6 місяців тому +1

    U never to fail me to make me smile every time

  • @bordenfleetwood5773
    @bordenfleetwood5773 6 місяців тому

    I did the rifle exhibition stuff for a hot second. Those spins and tosses are much harder than they look. The M-1 was never designed to be used in that manner; soldiers just figured it out anyway, and then it became standard. But yeah, it's hard as shit. I was always way better at the more formal IDR.

  • @StarCJ152
    @StarCJ152 6 місяців тому

    Love your vids!!! Thank you for always making me laugh
    !!!!!!!!😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

  • @illige
    @illige 6 місяців тому

    Honor guard is hard af. One minor infraction youre smoked

  • @CrZy_Pika
    @CrZy_Pika 6 місяців тому

    love you nikoooo

  • @AnnaKrawczynski
    @AnnaKrawczynski 6 місяців тому

    I love your videos❤. Could you do one on the Medics.😂

  • @s.cottrill
    @s.cottrill 6 місяців тому

    Night Land Nav in PLDC O found a damned hole deep enough to be a grave the hard way. Seen it during the day land nav.

  • @Daredevil311-g9l
    @Daredevil311-g9l 6 місяців тому

    Nikko is my spirit animal

  • @iamvictorperez1482
    @iamvictorperez1482 6 місяців тому

    Dude that Sailor on live TV 😂

  • @Hunter-11325
    @Hunter-11325 6 місяців тому

    6:54 why does that look like all the woods I walked through at campbell..

  • @SamuelMottaGarcia
    @SamuelMottaGarcia 6 місяців тому

    Nikko gave his floor back shots before GTA 6
    💀💀

  • @dominichayden-dade
    @dominichayden-dade 6 місяців тому

    9:00 one dude tried to impress me with that 😂😂😂 it didnt work for shit tho

  • @Thedude_59_
    @Thedude_59_ 6 місяців тому +2

    When I was 9 I stood in a fire ant mound for 6 minutes no reaction, ain't got shit on me bro

    • @Thedude_59_
      @Thedude_59_ 6 місяців тому

      Had an ants head stuck in my big toe the whole day until I got home and my mom removed it

  • @1ltrooster377
    @1ltrooster377 6 місяців тому

    the second clip I thought bro slapping himself was the ants gettin hit markers

  • @BearWithM30nDhis0ne
    @BearWithM30nDhis0ne 6 місяців тому

    Nikki!
    Lov ur Videos bro!
    .

  • @griffinspady9019
    @griffinspady9019 6 місяців тому

    Nah, my kid and I watch your stuff, Now my son, sounds 100% just like you and my neighbors are concerned.

  • @Axis-allies4728
    @Axis-allies4728 6 місяців тому

    8:57 major payne aaah throw

  • @gearkhancorrino7307
    @gearkhancorrino7307 6 місяців тому

    OMG hated my NVGs, AN/PVS-5s!!! Hated driving with those, depth perception almost non-existent, unless you bobbed your head back and forth.

  • @Crunch2327
    @Crunch2327 6 місяців тому

    British Army Kit, held together with green string and harry black.
    Bristish Army Squaddies, held together with brufen and tubegrip.😂
    First time we got thermal imaging in the earlym90s, our Sgt Major used em to hunt for guys smoking on Ex.. they got beasted.. 😂😂😂

  • @Discfishguy
    @Discfishguy 6 місяців тому

    they trust the security forces with NVGs without training, I was BAFFLED you did NVG training.... yet, we lost them too.

  • @nosmokebot8877
    @nosmokebot8877 6 місяців тому

    Leaving July 8th for boot camp, I’m 26 and the day after I went into the recruiting office. A female navy recruiter slid in my dms to try and enlist me 😂😂

  • @NightHunters-TV
    @NightHunters-TV 6 місяців тому

    0:44 the tan line from the watch is crazy (I have one too lol)

  • @SCORCHGAMING34
    @SCORCHGAMING34 6 місяців тому

    8:17 the moment you realize you rolled your sleeves too tight

  • @That1codgamer
    @That1codgamer 6 місяців тому

    Niko comeing in with the clutch video

  • @MrSqueasil
    @MrSqueasil 6 місяців тому

    got me beat. 38 seconds here. them fire ants are fire.

  • @Disillusioned_1
    @Disillusioned_1 6 місяців тому

    good day when Nikko posts.

  • @benjaminsnyder4352
    @benjaminsnyder4352 6 місяців тому

    FREAKING CAMP LEJEUNE! BRO I DID THE FIRE ANT CHALLAGE FOR 75SEC

  • @CarmellaElla
    @CarmellaElla 6 місяців тому

    ALLLLLL the branches slid into my DMs to get to my son.

  • @accubond3004
    @accubond3004 12 днів тому

    Dude 8:00 was literally what happened to me then I tried to join the marines and had to much brain damage from playing football and it was like almost instantly all the messages stopped lol😂

  • @MrAndrewCreech
    @MrAndrewCreech 5 місяців тому

    I live in Florida. Getting caught in a fire ant nest is a Tuesday. 40 seconds is a long ass time.

  • @bladeshorty
    @bladeshorty 6 місяців тому

    Driving for the 1st time with NVGs was the bigger pain in the ass.

  • @jonathangouveia7650
    @jonathangouveia7650 6 місяців тому

    Nikko funny as shit lol love these videos

  • @MoorlanderEDC
    @MoorlanderEDC 6 місяців тому

    Heavy starch? I have socks under my bed just like that

  • @Desert_Reptiles1767
    @Desert_Reptiles1767 6 місяців тому

    Nikko why you have 2 funniest military fails (5)

  • @JoeRogansBigToe
    @JoeRogansBigToe 6 місяців тому

    Nikko i see u lookin fresh today bromther never change Nikko😘

  • @jackeskins4658
    @jackeskins4658 6 місяців тому

    Rainbow hair guy hits drill . 3 seconds later found Jesus.

  • @SkepticalJoe
    @SkepticalJoe 6 місяців тому

    I'm just glad my bowels aren't the only ones who have had a problem with the beef taco MRE. Seriously save every toilet/tissue paper roll from MREs that you can. You never know when you gonna need it...

  • @christopermiller5543
    @christopermiller5543 6 місяців тому

    Was texted and called by a navy recruiter a few weeks ago. Trying to convince me to sign up saying I could weld if I got some nuclear job if I got a high enough asvap score

  • @scottsquatch89
    @scottsquatch89 6 місяців тому

    I've been the recruiter sliding in the DM's... it don't work. UNLESS! you're a good looking female recruiter, then those little fools be coming to the office every week. Still don't join though! 🤣

  • @OfficialMarxman
    @OfficialMarxman 6 місяців тому +1

    When r the podcasts coming back nikko?

  • @HoboJoe10000
    @HoboJoe10000 6 місяців тому

    Armed drill is fun as shit, especially when you get good.

  • @TZWhelan
    @TZWhelan 6 місяців тому

    Armed exhibition (flippy rifle) is so much fun, but we do not get no women 🤣🤣

  • @diegocuellar6318
    @diegocuellar6318 6 місяців тому +1

    had a recruiter text my parent, don't know how they even got their number

  • @justinboucher7582
    @justinboucher7582 6 місяців тому

    Staff sgt went up a hill and left us to walk in circles with i.r. tape on diffrent rocks.... we're out for 6 hours and while staff sgt and master and company command laughed and recorded. We were the example that night

  • @bradley8187
    @bradley8187 6 місяців тому

    Hey Nikko are you going to get on pepperbox?

  • @kriptiksoulja
    @kriptiksoulja 6 місяців тому

    Bruh flippy spinny with the m1 damn i love it my 35yo ass can still do it 😂

  • @joeyplays8908
    @joeyplays8908 6 місяців тому

    what's up Nikko great video

  • @Tacos_Paco
    @Tacos_Paco 6 місяців тому

    We played Spades like men.

  • @glfagle-grindle7754
    @glfagle-grindle7754 6 місяців тому

    3:56 goes hard

  • @BillyMatthews-ub7kw
    @BillyMatthews-ub7kw 6 місяців тому

    How Bored are Marines to go and run through a river😅😅😅

  • @annalisacandaso-robertson9179
    @annalisacandaso-robertson9179 6 місяців тому

    The "Iraqi cribs" dude is hilarious. You need to find him. He's a comedian.

  • @kingslayer4427
    @kingslayer4427 6 місяців тому

    @nikkoortiz going through a break up some how you got me laughing appreciate you G

  • @dylonpress7034
    @dylonpress7034 6 місяців тому

    Post military treatment: ibuprofen, cigarettes, and booze