When I search up videos of people dealing with depression to try to feel not so alone, I end up feeling even more alone. Even other people with depression seem happier than me. People can see my depression on my face and my body language and they treat me differently because of it. I try to hide it and it still comes through. I hardly have the energy and motivation to fake a smile. I feel so alone.
I feel you :( me I am with no intentions of keep living. My boyfriend has left me, I had to move back with my Grandma, my friends are far now and I cannot work in my dream job yet
I cried so hard while watching this video. I genuinely know how BAAAD it feels to feel empty. During the peak of my depression, it felt so scary and disgusting to wake up feeling empty, fall asleep at night still feeling empty, and going through the day and facing people with a smile, ALL while still feeling empty. I'm just really really happy that you have found even a glimpse of light in that dark cave you are currently in, Kaiti. I also thought before that there is no end in what I'm feeling.. but I'm proud to say that I am here, after almost 2 years.. present and alive. Not fully happy, not fully at peace, but still breathing and existing. Love you so much, my Kaiti Yoo. 💗
Pls Do Gyan mudra /chin mudra everyday for atleast 30 minutes. Also do Ashtanga yoga everyday, especially pranayam and meditation. You can also wear rudraksha mala which has been proven to help mentally. Have lots of natural sunlight(vitamin d helps a lot). Have a good ayurvedic diet which has all important minerals and vitamins. All this helps a lot in anxiety and depressive disorder and it's proven. It helped me too. Even if you can't do all others, do the chin mudra. Best of luck !
Oh dear heart..Try the Carnivore diet!! (all meat and meat by products ) People are giving many anecdotal reports of getting set free from long standing major depression and anxiety on this diet!! It seems to happen very quickly too!! The carnivore testimonials are all over the internet right now!! ..And also; from a more spiritual standpoint now.. I would encourage you to try opening your mouth and praying to God, through the Lord Jesus Christ, and say: "Lord Jesus please save me and be my Lord..I give you my life today..Please take it and make of it what you will..I thank you for loving me and hearing me now!!" ...My heartfelt and loving prayers going with you
Can you help with the reliable source I would really appreciate it Many people talk about mushrooms and psychedelics but nobody talks about where to get them. Very hard to get a reliable source here in Germany. Really need
@@rawanbadran829 Have you overcome it cause I have the same problem, I'm so tired of feeling nothing but the constand urge to disappear and kms, I wish I was able to cry cause that would help so much with coping, at this point i just walk with a dead face, faking a smile whenever around my friends and family and also anger issues appeared, i just hurt myself to calm down wonder when it'll get to the point of cutting my arms. I just write out my problems on the internet so it will easen my mind and distract me, sorry if you feel overwhelmed because of it
The thing about hurrying is an American mentality. Yesterday I saw there was a line behind me at self checkout but for once I decided I didn’t need to rush to finish as quick as possible and could do the task calmly. It’s not rude to slow down, it’s about giving weight and energy to the right things. Despite what American society tells you, you don’t need to be exceptional at anything, you can just vibe your whole life and it will be a great one! ~lessons from an Italian expat
Thank you for sharing this! Something I’ve started practicing this last ~6 months and it’s scary but feels right for me! I don’t need to be or live exceptionally, just want to move forward, grow and enjoy it!
god this is quite brave of you. I applaud your courage. I often have experiences with social anxiety (no diagnosis) but the burden to be more accustomed to people and failing them, worrying about their thoughts on who I am is still a difficult task for me to unwrap so thank you for sharing. You are indeed an inspiration for what mindset I want to be in
love this you're so right. it's a much more stress free life to live it slowly and calmly. I try to do it whenever I can no need to rush thankyou for sharing
I have been depressed for a long time, but after taking shrooms few months ago, l feel much happier and highly motivated and my ADHD gone , lost a ton of anxiousness and had a few epiphanies about how I should live my life. I decided to buy an ounce for backup, but haven’t yet felt the need to take any more since then.
she is one of the strongest. the fact she took a risk and shared this with us, filmed it, and realize what she was going through. Take care, lots of support
I relate to this video so much. The pressure and guilt to work but you just can't. It's so hard to explain because life goes on but you're just paralyzed and can't move along with it so you feel worse as you miss out on things, events, deadlines... Despite we've been improving as a society in terms of raising awareness about it, this is a disease that's impossible to truly understand unless you experience it. So glad you decided to make a video about it. And so happy that treatment is working for you. We got this
This is 100% how i felt the last few years. Went from a job i worked overtime becauase i was passionate about it to barely able to get anything at all done in a day. Cycle of exhaustion, guilt, shame, fear
I 100% have been going through this for 3 years. I was so hyper productive and busy for 10+ years. And I’ve crashed and burned since the pandemic and a series of personal/family issues. It’s been difficult to recover from the burn out after the depression has gone away.
Pls Do Gyan mudra /chin mudra everyday for atleast 30 minutes. It works so well. Also do Ashtanga yoga everyday, especially pranayam and meditation. You can also wear rudraksha mala which has been proven to help mentally. Have lots of natural sunlight(vitamin d helps a lot). Have a good ayurvedic diet which has all important minerals and vitamins. All this helps a lot in anxiety and depressive disorder and it's proven. It helped me too. Even if you can't do all others, do the chin mudra. Best of luck !
The scariest thing is that you seem so okay. People can not see what happens within a person if it is not an obvious wound. So much healing has to come and it will. My dad died on this Christmas Day, I was only 14. My mum’s had serious mental health problems and has been unstable my entire life. I have been struggling so much and people can’t see it. It makes you feel helpless and invisible. I just want to let anyone out there know that you will get through this. You can and will. Even though you have a lot to get through, the light is always lurking somewhere in the dark, you just have to find it. Thank you Kaiti, for being vulnerable and sharing your experiences, hopefully everyone can grow and support each other. Smile at someone next time you see them, you never know how much they need it. ☀️
I’m so sorry to hear that. You are so brave for sharing that and I want to remind you that you are loved and worthy. Depression is so hard, but there is always hope out there. Make sure that you reach out to someone to talk about this because you deserve the help you need. Please stay safe, and may God bless and strengthen you and your family 🤍 and remember God loves you unconditionally as He gave His only Son to live, die, and rise for you. He is there for you too “Come to Me all who are weary and burdened and I will give you rest” Matthew 11:28
Kaiti, I’ve been following you for a while and I love your tiktoks, but this in incredibly refreshing and personal and as a person with chronic illness and mental health struggles, you are helping me feel less alone. I hope this comment helps you feel the same 💜 it’s so, so hard, and I have no advice for you, I respect you too much to do that. But I believe in you and your ability to make it through.
I do have once piece of experience: it took me 5 years to find a combination of meds that work well. Lexapro was my starter med and it wasn’t perfect, so I kept working and eventually found the right ones. I think a lot of people who take medication will probably say the same.
I can’t describe how timely finding your video was. I struggle with anxiety, am starting lexipro, and I’m going to start therapy (for the third time) on Thursday. As an asian christian woman who is also led by creativity, you have given me a glimpse of hope to carry on down the same paths you are taking. This season will not be forever. Thank you for sharing your journey and here’s to getting healthier and better!
@@SSM12457 i have started therapy and anti depressants for the first time so I am hopeful that I will greatly benefit from them, especially after seeing my mom recover using them. Also staying really close to God by prayer and reading scripture is a source of great comfort. I wish you health and peace 🙏
Thank you for being vulnerable and sharing your journey with us. It's beautiful to see how you're growing in character and faith this season. I'll be praying that you will be healed from depression, this season will end.
I can feel your pain through this video, I'm so happy the later clips felt more energetic. Depression isn't easy to navigate but I hope you continue to feel better❤
You say that you can’t even count on yourself to save you, but Kaiti, by turning down that brand deal, that is absolutely what you did. You followed your gut to do what is best for you right now, and that takes hella courage. Don’t believe everything you think. I’m proud of you! Be well.
November 2022 was really a point where everyone was on their breaking point(it seems), including me. Some major endings happened in my life too- relationship, and a new career. I have been suffering for the past 6 months. Only in May that I started to feel better. All the best and all the power to you Kaiti. Remember to take care of yourself. Take your meds, eat healthy and go for long hot girl walks. Snapping out of an overthinking spiral is really important to me. Also dancing or some form of expressing yourself can help❤
Okay but fr tho!! 😭😭😭 November 2022 was wild. I was so stressed trying to finish my last fall semester, I also got into a relationship, I graduated in May, am trying to find a stable job, and I can't remember a day in June where I didn't cry myself to sleep. It's been a lot but I'm hoping it gets better 😭 I'm so happy it's getting better for you and I hope it continues to get better 💖💖💖
I’ve realized working towards a YT channel is hard yo, especially when you’re mentally drained so I really appreciate you documenting this for us all going through it too!💙
It all sucks. I hate my job, I hate my life, no one wants to hangout, my family hates me, I have no time for myself I'm just a wage slave still struggling to get by. I do everything alone. I go outside everyday but it reminds me of everything I don't have. Seeing so many people enjoying themselves with tons of friends and then there's me, just some nobody no one cares about who's been completely left behind. I can relate to you so hard. Whatever days off I do have, I don't even get out of bed. My life is a complete regrettable waste. I wish I was never born.
@@javierpacheco8234 sorry you feel that way man. People are fake anyway. All they care about is what you're going to do for them. It's better to be alone
@@yandangao9258 Same I think about that every night before I go to bed. I even thought about suicide many times last year when my life hit rock bottom. I'm still struggling trying to get myself back together. The pain only makes us stronger.
as someone who has depression, struggling and fighting tooth and nail each day, hearing that "roots grow deepest in the winters" literally made me cry. thank you.
I’m so exhausted from life. Your video makes me feel so seen and heard. I wish I had your courage. But just know seeing this has made me feel so validated. I hope you find the peace internally. You are so appreciated
Kaiti, I am so so so proud of you. As someone is going through depression right now and am unable to get help, I know how hard it is. Thank you so much for the thoughts you've been putting out and I hope you have a great day
Wow I don't normally comment but the entire video spoke volumes to me. From the family drama being the tipping point, to not celebrating the small winds. I'm terrible at articulating my thoughts and emotions but you were so eloquent this video and expressed my emotions and thought in a way I never could've. I pray for your journey and for a shining light at the end of your tunnel.
Glad to hear your feeling better. One good thing that comes out of depression is you really begin to appreciate the good days as u slowly get out of it. 💜
I had anxiety last year, Nov. 2022 and thought I’ll be in darkness for the rest of my life.. Started lexapro @ 5mg and it gets worse before it gets better at first.. But don’t give up.. comply to your meds and it usually takes 3-4 weeks to feel relief but in my case, I wasn’t sleeping well and feeling physiololigical symptoms.. it took me 5 months to really feel a relief. And for now, I’m back to normal Praise God! Therapy helps and don’t stop taking meds once you started unless your doctor tell you to do so. Try to change your routine. I know it’s really hard at first. You’ll get better. This too shall pass. Have faith!
Pls Do Gyan mudra /chin mudra everyday for atleast 30 minutes. It works very wonderfully. Also do Ashtanga yoga everyday, especially pranayam and meditation. You can also wear rudraksha mala which has been proven to help mentally. Have lots of natural sunlight(vitamin d helps a lot). Have a good ayurvedic diet which has all important minerals and vitamins. Do some intense exercise atleast 3 times a week as exercise produces good happy hormones. All this helps a lot in anxiety and depressive disorder and it's proven. It helped me immensely too. Even if you can't do all others, do the chin mudra. Best of luck !
I thought of making videos not about depressing just my daily life but I just don’t want to see myself again and think oh that part is ugly/weird and I should cut it and even so I will have to face negative comments.. so I didn’t. You are courageous enough to document it, edit it, look back at it and face any comments. You are stronger than the most of us. Keep it going.
Sending you lots of love and prayers! Thank you for sharing this video. During a depressive period in college, I remembering really resonating with the scene from Inside Out where all the buttons turn gray and the emotions can’t reach Riley anymore. That reminded me of the numbness you described. We are all here for you today and always! Love you! ❤❤️
Seasonal depression is the worst, it definitely got to me back when I thought it was *me* that was the problem. It never is. Trust me, you'll get better if you keep bettering yourself. Keep away from crap foods, get sun and fresh air everyday, keep moving around and try not to sit still for long amounts of time. I find the easiest exercise for me personally is going up and down stairs, even if in short bursts, but each person has something that works for them. Don't start with a lot, even 5 minutes of being outside in the sun a day, and 2 minutes of exercise, is good enough at first. A lot of people think depression comes from bad experiences and traumatic events, when it doesn't, not directly. Such events are catalysts that start you on your spiraling path, but life choices, even the smallest ones, are what determine whether you're able to detour from it. Whether life events tear you down, or make you stronger, is entirely dependent on the choices you make. The path to beating depression is not a short one, it takes months of small consistent steps to get better. But it does get better. I believe in you! I believe in all of you!
I'm sorry to hear you're going through this. We all are only human and although you pay your bills from this, there's nothing more important than your health, Kaiti. So take your time.
Im so sorry you are struggling lately but thank you for being so open about it. I think society needs to talk about mental health MORE. I feel you with the medication oh my life!!!! I didn’t respond well to any of mine so I have been raw dogging it on and off for years (7 years no meds depressed & anxiety) its so god damn HARD! Im thrilled yours started working for you & I hope you find the light at the end of this dark tunnel ❤❤
so so SO glad to see that you're on the mend! Depression is no joke, but it will pass. Just keep taking it one step at a time, and give yourself grace. You've got this
This is video is more important than you'll ever know. People need to be able to see what depression is from a day to day period. I have had periods of depression that were absolutely debilitating and would spend weeks without ever leaving the house. Suicidal thoughts would cross my mind most of the day. This lasted for 5-6 years. Now I am in a great place, but depression is horrific. You're so brave. Thank you.
As someone who's been through depression as well, it's going to be hard, of course. But, it's never the end and you can get through it. No matter what decisions you make, just know that we will be there for you!
this next part is so wonderful!! i’ve been on my antidepressants for almost a year and it’s been the best year of my life. Try not to shame yourself for your feelings, the best is yet to come
Thank you for being honest and not tying things up with a pretty bow and happy ever after ending. You're doing a lot to contribute to the normalization of mental health struggles. Wishing you nothing but the best 🙏
Your openness and vulnerability really touched me. It's not easy to share such raw emotions, and I appreciate you letting us in on your journey. You're doing great-taking steps, even the smallest ones, is already a victory. Remember, it's okay to take your time to heal, and celebrating those small wins matters. Thank you for sharing your story, and I've subscribed to your channel to keep supporting you. Stay strong! 🥰💖
I am hoping you are doing well now love. It was soo damn hard for me to explain my depression to my family but they just told me I was making excuses for my laziness and that it happens to everybody. That I am just trying to be a wannabe or something. I feel terrible though I know this time they are wrong. I hope you have understanding people around you. I gain positivity whenever I see you Kaiti. You are super strong 💪 ❤️
Girl you are amazing! Listening to you gives me clarity that I’m not alone. I struggle with depression and anxiety and possibly stress and getting panic attacks for no reason. It’s a lot but I believe we can both get through it. 😊
Im kinda late but as a fellow depresso girl i gotta say this video hit where it hurt and healed where it hit all at once LMAO- but really tho, kaiti, thank you so much for being so incredibly vulnerable about this (and even finding the energy/motivation/discipline/consistency/idk frog to do this video) take all the time you need to fall back in love with what you do (and even if you don't, that's ok too) we will all keep patiently waiting for you no matter how long it takes :)
More power to you for posting this. I've suffered from depression and anxiety for years, and IMHO it can be a very cruel thing to live with. Hoping things are looking up for you since this time.
Aw, proud of you, Kaiti Yoo!! Meds are hard to get right. Even if you don't get it right at first, it's still so nice to get a break from being SO sad all the time. And if you're paying attention to HOW they're helpful, (even if it's not your perfect fit,) you will glean great wisdom from your journey. Wishing you the best of luck, and better days ahead!! :)
You were someone I really admired from the first video of yours that I saw. I really appreciate you posting this, I'm going through my own mental health stuff at the moment and knowing that even someone as impressive as you are has to deal with this bullshit makes me feel less defective. I wish you well.
Currently going through a super heavy depressive period of my life after a few months of joy and it feels so confusing to get so low again after feeling so okay. Thank you for sharing this - authenticity can mean different things online nowadays but this is exactly what we need. I appreciate your vulnerability so much ❤️
Thank you for opening up about your depression and your path to feeling better. I’m glad the medication started working for you and that you’re still in therapy. Hope things keep getting better for you and your yt channel. Take care!
Watching this has been very cathartic b/c it just makes me feel less alone and so seen, so thank you for making this video. Being vulnerable in front of anyone let alone a huge audience is so incredibly courageous
i’ve been going through an eerily similar situation with a similar timeline and seeing this has been unbelievably validating. when the big things stop bringing you joy, you gotta focus on the small, minute things. there is always high uncertainty but there is definitely a way through it, no matter how unlikely it may seem in the moment. thank you for your vulnerability and sending you love, kaiti 🤍
I'm sorry you had to go through all of this, Katie. So happy to see that you're making slow but steady steps forward towards healing. You're not alone.
You managed to summarise my experience with depression in a video, the numbness it causes is so tiring, and just knowing you won't be able to do the things you should do causes a lot of guilt. I hope it'll get better for you, you deserve to feel good💫
I really needed to see this. I have been battling with depression on and off my meds due to not wanting to have that stigma over my head and not feeling comfortable with taking the medication. I have caught myself not taking proper care of myself or my work and it’s affecting more than even so back on my medication I am going. At the pharmacy now to get myself back in alignment with the better side of myself
Kaiti, I was recently going through another season of utter numbness and apathy even after I celebrated recovering from depression. Sometimes I wonder if this is just going to be a lifetime thing. But then I remember that this present suffering is nothing in comparison to the glory that God will reveal to us later. How much greater can that glory be??! But I’m writing this message because Psalm 40 has also been anchoring me in God’s promises during this “relapse”. “I waited patiently for the Lord to help me, and he turned to me and heard my cry. He lifted me out of the pit of despair, out of the mud and the mire. He set my feet on solid ground and steadied me as I walked along.” Praise God that He hears our cries! Praying for you, sister in Christ!
I was diagnosed with depression shortly after I turned 14 and I have struggle with it for so many years. I’m 19 now and i still struggle. But not at much as my past self, who was in therapy two times per week. I want to be thank you for this video and for being so vulnerable. Depression is so hard and it’s so common and I’m so glad that we are starting to be able to talk about it more openly. ❤ I’m so sorry that you struggled with depression and I’m so happy to hear you are doing better now ❤❤❤❤
"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest" - Matthew 11:28. Thank you for being vulnerable with us Kaiti, feel better 🤍
I thought you were quiet on here. Thanks for opening up, it's so common that there is no reason to feel ashamed. I'm not religious so unfortunately cant turn to that to help me
here i sit, with a broken kneecap, the sun is blazing and yet i sit inside, not really able to finish a task that i still need to do and not really being able to apply for a job though i reeeally need money. very relatable kaiti, and very good to see your ups!
Oh girl so sorry for you, from someone that suffer chronic depression since I was a kid I can tell you that feeling lost and feeling that you don't see a way out of this will pass and the light will shine 💪🏼 I completely understand those feelings and are horrible and when I'm in the dark hole is hard to think that I will go through this and everything will be ok,but it's always ok and the future will be better ❤
Im your follower for A REALLY long time and I have been here since almost beginning. You were always my first inspriation in everything. From style to your beautiful personality. You deserve the world and if u dont want to applaud yourself for your lil achievements I will!! Girl please take your time, you have support from here! Love you so much I can't even say it in words
it's so refreshing seeing you take a step towards an organic life where you aren't pressured to sell your soul n health to money. the first time i saw you was 2 years ago when you made lookbooks! i can't imagine the the amount of pressure you went through the past 3 months but i'm glad, we're all glad that you feel better
You are so brave to record this. I have been in depression from a very long time now in bouts but from last 14 months the feelings of guilt, shame, fear, regrets and sadness are just constant. I still am ashamed of taking a therapy for this or any drugs. I was constantly told that Im only being lazy and procrastinating and Im not working to my best potential. I have no emotional and moral support and I feel so and so alone. Its scary. I feel hopeless and worthless.
Girl you've always had it in the bag, you just need to let yourself celebrate small and big wins, all things alike. Family stuff is hard and the mind is hard too. I believe you have a fighter in you so don't rush it, let yourself start one step at a time. If anything I know things will always align with patience. God is on your side always, love you lots and take care! ❤🙏
It took me a couple of tries to get the right meds, and that’s okay! I’m happy to see you celebrating small victories bc small victories are actually big ones when you’re struggling!
@@jaeminok8544 It is fine & good actually! Nothing to be shamed about having a comfort character who will give you the love you deserve. Your feelings are valid & real!
Even while stressed depressed lemon zest you continue to rock that flawless shampoo commercial hair
LMAOOOOOOOOOOO why thank you
Doesn't she, though?! ❤
"Stressed depressed lemon zest" is awesome thank lolll you for adding a happy note to this heavy video ❤
Just relax and enjoy the life...
Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life?
When I search up videos of people dealing with depression to try to feel not so alone, I end up feeling even more alone. Even other people with depression seem happier than me. People can see my depression on my face and my body language and they treat me differently because of it. I try to hide it and it still comes through. I hardly have the energy and motivation to fake a smile. I feel so alone.
I feel you :( me I am with no intentions of keep living. My boyfriend has left me, I had to move back with my Grandma, my friends are far now and I cannot work in my dream job yet
@@mosaicolaico quietly out loud read the New Testament slowly and ask God for help.
Hi user, I feel you. Your words describe really well what I feel. I hope you are feeling better now cause you deserve it
@@mosaicolaicoare you still there?
It's funny bc i can hide my struggles very well... yet I also feel alone
I cried so hard while watching this video. I genuinely know how BAAAD it feels to feel empty. During the peak of my depression, it felt so scary and disgusting to wake up feeling empty, fall asleep at night still feeling empty, and going through the day and facing people with a smile, ALL while still feeling empty. I'm just really really happy that you have found even a glimpse of light in that dark cave you are currently in, Kaiti. I also thought before that there is no end in what I'm feeling.. but I'm proud to say that I am here, after almost 2 years.. present and alive. Not fully happy, not fully at peace, but still breathing and existing. Love you so much, my Kaiti Yoo. 💗
I ate some cat and dogs because of her looks. Hoo chigini siang tao!
Pls Do Gyan mudra /chin mudra everyday for atleast 30 minutes. Also do Ashtanga yoga everyday, especially pranayam and meditation. You can also wear rudraksha mala which has been proven to help mentally. Have lots of natural sunlight(vitamin d helps a lot). Have a good ayurvedic diet which has all important minerals and vitamins. All this helps a lot in anxiety and depressive disorder and it's proven. It helped me too.
Even if you can't do all others, do the chin mudra. Best of luck !
Oh dear heart..Try the Carnivore diet!! (all meat and meat by products ) People are giving many anecdotal reports of getting set free from long standing major depression and anxiety on this diet!! It seems to happen very quickly too!! The carnivore testimonials are all over the internet right now!! ..And also; from a more spiritual standpoint now.. I would encourage you to try opening your mouth and praying to God, through the Lord Jesus Christ, and say: "Lord Jesus please save me and be my Lord..I give you my life today..Please take it and make of it what you will..I thank you for loving me and hearing me now!!" ...My heartfelt and loving prayers going with you
Hugs 🥰
Can you help with the reliable source I would really appreciate it Many people talk about mushrooms and psychedelics but nobody talks about where to get them. Very hard to get a reliable source here in Germany. Really need
Feeling numb is the worst, today I cried for no reason and you know what crying is much better than not feeling anything.
I agree so much
i agree it def sucks. i’ve felt so numb these past few months that i can’t even cry no matter what
Fr
I cry whenever I have the urge to cry, it's sooooooo satisfying
@@rawanbadran829 Have you overcome it cause I have the same problem, I'm so tired of feeling nothing but the constand urge to disappear and kms, I wish I was able to cry cause that would help so much with coping, at this point i just walk with a dead face, faking a smile whenever around my friends and family and also anger issues appeared, i just hurt myself to calm down wonder when it'll get to the point of cutting my arms. I just write out my problems on the internet so it will easen my mind and distract me, sorry if you feel overwhelmed because of it
The thing about hurrying is an American mentality. Yesterday I saw there was a line behind me at self checkout but for once I decided I didn’t need to rush to finish as quick as possible and could do the task calmly. It’s not rude to slow down, it’s about giving weight and energy to the right things. Despite what American society tells you, you don’t need to be exceptional at anything, you can just vibe your whole life and it will be a great one! ~lessons from an Italian expat
Thank you for sharing this! Something I’ve started practicing this last ~6 months and it’s scary but feels right for me! I don’t need to be or live exceptionally, just want to move forward, grow and enjoy it!
god this is quite brave of you. I applaud your courage. I often have experiences with social anxiety (no diagnosis) but the burden to be more accustomed to people and failing them, worrying about their thoughts on who I am is still a difficult task for me to unwrap so thank you for sharing. You are indeed an inspiration for what mindset I want to be in
love this you're so right. it's a much more stress free life to live it slowly and calmly. I try to do it whenever I can
no need to rush
thankyou for sharing
Omg I HATE slow people in line
You can be annoyed… but we don’t have to go faster just because you’re mad :)
So incredibly proud of you Kaiti for being brave and vulnerable. Hope you feel better soon❤️🩹🫂
omg zoeeeeeee😭😭😭😭💙💙💙💙
I love you so muchhh
For being vulnerable?
My ex wife
I have been depressed for a long time, but after taking shrooms few months ago, l feel much happier and highly motivated and my ADHD gone , lost a ton of anxiousness and had a few epiphanies about how I should live my life. I decided to buy an ounce for backup, but haven’t yet felt the need to take any more since then.
I have autism, I was diagnosed with it when I was 15. I tried shrooms and it made me function so much better.
Yeah doc.brenttt is your guide. Man is exceptional with anything psychedelics.
Yes doc.Brenttt
Psychedelics really has a-lot of potential medical benefits. So cool-
Doc.brenttt helped me discover alot about psychedelics,healed me of my bipolar disorder & alcohol addiction.
she is one of the strongest. the fact she took a risk and shared this with us, filmed it, and realize what she was going through. Take care, lots of support
I relate to this video so much. The pressure and guilt to work but you just can't. It's so hard to explain because life goes on but you're just paralyzed and can't move along with it so you feel worse as you miss out on things, events, deadlines... Despite we've been improving as a society in terms of raising awareness about it, this is a disease that's impossible to truly understand unless you experience it. So glad you decided to make a video about it. And so happy that treatment is working for you. We got this
This is 100% how i felt the last few years. Went from a job i worked overtime becauase i was passionate about it to barely able to get anything at all done in a day.
Cycle of exhaustion, guilt, shame, fear
I 100% have been going through this for 3 years. I was so hyper productive and busy for 10+ years. And I’ve crashed and burned since the pandemic and a series of personal/family issues. It’s been difficult to recover from the burn out after the depression has gone away.
@@vee_grave hoping things improve for you!!
Things have gotten much better than they were but wow do I hope to be back to normal eventually
Pls Do Gyan mudra /chin mudra everyday for atleast 30 minutes. It works so well. Also do Ashtanga yoga everyday, especially pranayam and meditation. You can also wear rudraksha mala which has been proven to help mentally. Have lots of natural sunlight(vitamin d helps a lot). Have a good ayurvedic diet which has all important minerals and vitamins. All this helps a lot in anxiety and depressive disorder and it's proven. It helped me too.
Even if you can't do all others, do the chin mudra. Best of luck !
@veronicagrave159 How are you currently feeling? I feel a burnout myself and find it difficult to move forward in life.
@@SSM12457dont give up,take it easy,you are beauthifull and smart
i feel so much better knowing that i'm not alone, thank you for sharing this.
The scariest thing is that you seem so okay. People can not see what happens within a person if it is not an obvious wound. So much healing has to come and it will.
My dad died on this Christmas Day, I was only 14. My mum’s had serious mental health problems and has been unstable my entire life. I have been struggling so much and people can’t see it. It makes you feel helpless and invisible.
I just want to let anyone out there know that you will get through this. You can and will. Even though you have a lot to get through, the light is always lurking somewhere in the dark, you just have to find it.
Thank you Kaiti, for being vulnerable and sharing your experiences, hopefully everyone can grow and support each other. Smile at someone next time you see them, you never know how much they need it. ☀️
I’m so sorry to hear that. You are so brave for sharing that and I want to remind you that you are loved and worthy. Depression is so hard, but there is always hope out there. Make sure that you reach out to someone to talk about this because you deserve the help you need. Please stay safe, and may God bless and strengthen you and your family 🤍 and remember God loves you unconditionally as He gave His only Son to live, die, and rise for you. He is there for you too
“Come to Me all who are weary and burdened and I will give you rest” Matthew 11:28
my dad also died when I was 14 😢
I'm so sorry. Prayers
Kaiti, I’ve been following you for a while and I love your tiktoks, but this in incredibly refreshing and personal and as a person with chronic illness and mental health struggles, you are helping me feel less alone. I hope this comment helps you feel the same 💜 it’s so, so hard, and I have no advice for you, I respect you too much to do that. But I believe in you and your ability to make it through.
I do have once piece of experience: it took me 5 years to find a combination of meds that work well. Lexapro was my starter med and it wasn’t perfect, so I kept working and eventually found the right ones. I think a lot of people who take medication will probably say the same.
I can’t describe how timely finding your video was. I struggle with anxiety, am starting lexipro, and I’m going to start therapy (for the third time) on Thursday. As an asian christian woman who is also led by creativity, you have given me a glimpse of hope to carry on down the same paths you are taking.
This season will not be forever. Thank you for sharing your journey and here’s to getting healthier and better!
How are you feeling now? Are you still on meds and therapy? I'm seriously considering it for the first time for my depression and anxiety
@Eserr7856 I have been going to therapy but still feel empty inside. Life is too difficult in my eyes. How is your journey going?
@@SSM12457 i have started therapy and anti depressants for the first time so I am hopeful that I will greatly benefit from them, especially after seeing my mom recover using them. Also staying really close to God by prayer and reading scripture is a source of great comfort. I wish you health and peace 🙏
@@Eserr7856 Thanks for the reply. I wish you the best and send prayers your way. 🙏
@@Eserr7856dont give up,i wish you a really nice day
Been there girl. I was also superwoman until I got depressed and realized I was a normal person. Gives you a lot more empathy!
Thank you for this words. 🙂
sameeee!!!
Thank you for being vulnerable and sharing your journey with us. It's beautiful to see how you're growing in character and faith this season. I'll be praying that you will be healed from depression, this season will end.
aw my love you have so much support behind you, and a community and friends that love you. i hope you feel better soon. always here for you.
I can feel your pain through this video, I'm so happy the later clips felt more energetic. Depression isn't easy to navigate but I hope you continue to feel better❤
You say that you can’t even count on yourself to save you, but Kaiti, by turning down that brand deal, that is absolutely what you did. You followed your gut to do what is best for you right now, and that takes hella courage. Don’t believe everything you think. I’m proud of you! Be well.
November 2022 was really a point where everyone was on their breaking point(it seems), including me. Some major endings happened in my life too- relationship, and a new career. I have been suffering for the past 6 months. Only in May that I started to feel better. All the best and all the power to you Kaiti. Remember to take care of yourself. Take your meds, eat healthy and go for long hot girl walks. Snapping out of an overthinking spiral is really important to me. Also dancing or some form of expressing yourself can help❤
Okay but fr tho!! 😭😭😭 November 2022 was wild. I was so stressed trying to finish my last fall semester, I also got into a relationship, I graduated in May, am trying to find a stable job, and I can't remember a day in June where I didn't cry myself to sleep. It's been a lot but I'm hoping it gets better 😭 I'm so happy it's getting better for you and I hope it continues to get better 💖💖💖
It’s something about November Fr.
It's November now and it honestly feels awful.
@@derrickogoledont give up
I’ve realized working towards a YT channel is hard yo, especially when you’re mentally drained so I really appreciate you documenting this for us all going through it too!💙
It all sucks. I hate my job, I hate my life, no one wants to hangout, my family hates me, I have no time for myself I'm just a wage slave still struggling to get by. I do everything alone. I go outside everyday but it reminds me of everything I don't have. Seeing so many people enjoying themselves with tons of friends and then there's me, just some nobody no one cares about who's been completely left behind. I can relate to you so hard. Whatever days off I do have, I don't even get out of bed. My life is a complete regrettable waste. I wish I was never born.
Wish I wasn't born either, my life is full of loneliness as well and I'm just 23.
I wish I was never born. I think about that everyday.😢
@@javierpacheco8234 sorry you feel that way man. People are fake anyway. All they care about is what you're going to do for them. It's better to be alone
@@yandangao9258 Same I think about that every night before I go to bed. I even thought about suicide many times last year when my life hit rock bottom. I'm still struggling trying to get myself back together. The pain only makes us stronger.
I'm 53 that feeling never ends
as someone who has depression, struggling and fighting tooth and nail each day, hearing that "roots grow deepest in the winters" literally made me cry. thank you.
I’m so exhausted from life. Your video makes me feel so seen and heard. I wish I had your courage. But just know seeing this has made me feel so validated. I hope you find the peace internally. You are so appreciated
Kaiti, I am so so so proud of you. As someone is going through depression right now and am unable to get help, I know how hard it is. Thank you so much for the thoughts you've been putting out and I hope you have a great day
Depression really sucks , having pms dysphoria made me realise this .
Those of you who are fighting it are so brave and more power to you !!
proud of you for seeking help and getting on the meds! they saved my life. 2 years later i am now coming off of them. It gets better❤❤❤ lots of love
Thanks for your honesty. As a person going through depression right now I realize how valuable that really is.
I'm in a bad mental state myself. Its not easy getting through life. How is your journey going?
thank you for being so open to us kaiti
You are so strong. No matter how you feel, you’re trying your best to get up in the AM each day and live. My thoughts are with you. ❤
Wow I don't normally comment but the entire video spoke volumes to me.
From the family drama being the tipping point, to not celebrating the small winds.
I'm terrible at articulating my thoughts and emotions but you were so eloquent this video and expressed my emotions and thought in a way I never could've.
I pray for your journey and for a shining light at the end of your tunnel.
As a person with depression, this is so relatable!
Lots of love and strength towards those worse days <
We love you and we're praying for you
Glad to hear your feeling better. One good thing that comes out of depression is you really begin to appreciate the good days as u slowly get out of it. 💜
I had anxiety last year, Nov. 2022 and thought I’ll be in darkness for the rest of my life.. Started lexapro @ 5mg and it gets worse before it gets better at first.. But don’t give up.. comply to your meds and it usually takes 3-4 weeks to feel relief but in my case, I wasn’t sleeping well and feeling physiololigical symptoms.. it took me 5 months to really feel a relief. And for now, I’m back to normal Praise God! Therapy helps and don’t stop taking meds once you started unless your doctor tell you to do so. Try to change your routine. I know it’s really hard at first. You’ll get better. This too shall pass. Have faith!
I'm dealing with anxiety and fatigue right now. I am sending you so much love and a warm hug!
me too
Pls Do Gyan mudra /chin mudra everyday for atleast 30 minutes. It works very wonderfully. Also do Ashtanga yoga everyday, especially pranayam and meditation. You can also wear rudraksha mala which has been proven to help mentally. Have lots of natural sunlight(vitamin d helps a lot). Have a good ayurvedic diet which has all important minerals and vitamins. Do some intense exercise atleast 3 times a week as exercise produces good happy hormones. All this helps a lot in anxiety and depressive disorder and it's proven. It helped me immensely too.
Even if you can't do all others, do the chin mudra. Best of luck !
I thought of making videos not about depressing just my daily life but I just don’t want to see myself again and think oh that part is ugly/weird and I should cut it and even so I will have to face negative comments.. so I didn’t. You are courageous enough to document it, edit it, look back at it and face any comments. You are stronger than the most of us. Keep it going.
Sending you lots of love and prayers! Thank you for sharing this video. During a depressive period in college, I remembering really resonating with the scene from Inside Out where all the buttons turn gray and the emotions can’t reach Riley anymore. That reminded me of the numbness you described. We are all here for you today and always! Love you! ❤❤️
Seasonal depression is the worst, it definitely got to me back when I thought it was *me* that was the problem. It never is. Trust me, you'll get better if you keep bettering yourself. Keep away from crap foods, get sun and fresh air everyday, keep moving around and try not to sit still for long amounts of time. I find the easiest exercise for me personally is going up and down stairs, even if in short bursts, but each person has something that works for them. Don't start with a lot, even 5 minutes of being outside in the sun a day, and 2 minutes of exercise, is good enough at first.
A lot of people think depression comes from bad experiences and traumatic events, when it doesn't, not directly. Such events are catalysts that start you on your spiraling path, but life choices, even the smallest ones, are what determine whether you're able to detour from it. Whether life events tear you down, or make you stronger, is entirely dependent on the choices you make. The path to beating depression is not a short one, it takes months of small consistent steps to get better. But it does get better.
I believe in you! I believe in all of you!
I'm sorry to hear you're going through this. We all are only human and although you pay your bills from this, there's nothing more important than your health, Kaiti. So take your time.
Im so sorry you are struggling lately but thank you for being so open about it. I think society needs to talk about mental health MORE.
I feel you with the medication oh my life!!!! I didn’t respond well to any of mine so I have been raw dogging it on and off for years (7 years no meds depressed & anxiety) its so god damn HARD! Im thrilled yours started working for you & I hope you find the light at the end of this dark tunnel ❤❤
You are amazing, this is amazing that you shared this.
thanks for this i feel so alone in my depression so it helps me and i wish u all the recovery
Giving you a virtual hug. I feel you. You’re already making progress. Cheers. ❤️
This raw vulernability I am so sure was hard to share, but it reminds us we all have struggles. thank you for being YOO!
so so SO glad to see that you're on the mend! Depression is no joke, but it will pass. Just keep taking it one step at a time, and give yourself grace. You've got this
the invisible brokenness is so so real 🥺 hugs and lots of healing 🧡
This is video is more important than you'll ever know. People need to be able to see what depression is from a day to day period. I have had periods of depression that were absolutely debilitating and would spend weeks without ever leaving the house. Suicidal thoughts would cross my mind most of the day. This lasted for 5-6 years. Now I am in a great place, but depression is horrific. You're so brave. Thank you.
As someone who's been through depression as well, it's going to be hard, of course. But, it's never the end and you can get through it. No matter what decisions you make, just know that we will be there for you!
this next part is so wonderful!! i’ve been on my antidepressants for almost a year and it’s been the best year of my life. Try not to shame yourself for your feelings, the best is yet to come
Thank you for being honest and not tying things up with a pretty bow and happy ever after ending. You're doing a lot to contribute to the normalization of mental health struggles. Wishing you nothing but the best 🙏
Your openness and vulnerability really touched me. It's not easy to share such raw emotions, and I appreciate you letting us in on your journey. You're doing great-taking steps, even the smallest ones, is already a victory. Remember, it's okay to take your time to heal, and celebrating those small wins matters. Thank you for sharing your story, and I've subscribed to your channel to keep supporting you. Stay strong! 🥰💖
This really hit home. Thanks for sharing this and being open about your faith too
going through the same shit rn. whoever's reading this, please take comfort knowing that you are not alone.
@isamonsta I needed to hear this thank you
I am hoping you are doing well now love. It was soo damn hard for me to explain my depression to my family but they just told me I was making excuses for my laziness and that it happens to everybody. That I am just trying to be a wannabe or something. I feel terrible though I know this time they are wrong. I hope you have understanding people around you. I gain positivity whenever I see you Kaiti. You are super strong 💪 ❤️
Girl you are amazing! Listening to you gives me clarity that I’m not alone. I struggle with depression and anxiety and possibly stress and getting panic attacks for no reason. It’s a lot but I believe we can both get through it. 😊
I Hope you are doing better now Kaiti.
We love you and thank you for sharing you’re feelings with us. Makes me feel less alone 🧡🌷
Sunny days during a depressive episode is so annoying. I appreciate you showing this. I am trying to get the courage to do what you are doing.
Im kinda late but as a fellow depresso girl i gotta say this video hit where it hurt and healed where it hit all at once LMAO-
but really tho, kaiti, thank you so much for being so incredibly vulnerable about this (and even finding the energy/motivation/discipline/consistency/idk frog to do this video)
take all the time you need to fall back in love with what you do (and even if you don't, that's ok too)
we will all keep patiently waiting for you no matter how long it takes :)
More power to you for posting this. I've suffered from depression and anxiety for years, and IMHO it can be a very cruel thing to live with. Hoping things are looking up for you since this time.
Aw, proud of you, Kaiti Yoo!! Meds are hard to get right. Even if you don't get it right at first, it's still so nice to get a break from being SO sad all the time. And if you're paying attention to HOW they're helpful, (even if it's not your perfect fit,) you will glean great wisdom from your journey. Wishing you the best of luck, and better days ahead!! :)
You were someone I really admired from the first video of yours that I saw. I really appreciate you posting this, I'm going through my own mental health stuff at the moment and knowing that even someone as impressive as you are has to deal with this bullshit makes me feel less defective. I wish you well.
Wishing you peace, Kaiti! It's scary to be so raw and vulnerable, and you're a brave and strong soul! Sending you loveee 💓🙏🏽
I have depression, I don’t know what to do. I don’t know if I’ll ever find happiness. I feel so lost and hopeless.
Why are you depressed tell me. you have to release your emotions or else it will become worse.
It’s all good man, I think you are focusing too much on your depression it doesn’t do anything but add to it
I am too, and I'm just here watching videos to understand this situation better
Need to take antidepressants
@@steventay5834 I mean they work but they are not a long term solution, I found that having a routine really helps
Thank you for being vulnerable Kaiti, God loves you so much and He is your strength ❤
Thank you for the video, Kaiti . I'm so proud of you. As a fellow depression sufferer, you are truly an inspiration ❤
Currently going through a super heavy depressive period of my life after a few months of joy and it feels so confusing to get so low again after feeling so okay. Thank you for sharing this - authenticity can mean different things online nowadays but this is exactly what we need. I appreciate your vulnerability so much ❤️
Thank you for opening up about your depression and your path to feeling better. I’m glad the medication started working for you and that you’re still in therapy. Hope things keep getting better for you and your yt channel. Take care!
you made me cry, i really needed this
Im SO GLAD you are alive!!!! You are living. You can do this and im happy for any small growth 💓
You spoke into what I'm going through. Thank you for your vulnerability Kaiti, you've been such a blessing!
Watching this has been very cathartic b/c it just makes me feel less alone and so seen, so thank you for making this video. Being vulnerable in front of anyone let alone a huge audience is so incredibly courageous
i’ve been going through an eerily similar situation with a similar timeline and seeing this has been unbelievably validating. when the big things stop bringing you joy, you gotta focus on the small, minute things. there is always high uncertainty but there is definitely a way through it, no matter how unlikely it may seem in the moment. thank you for your vulnerability and sending you love, kaiti 🤍
thank you for sharing this side of your life. this just shows we are all human and we all have to deal with our own mental struggles.
I'm sorry you had to go through all of this, Katie. So happy to see that you're making slow but steady steps forward towards healing. You're not alone.
You managed to summarise my experience with depression in a video, the numbness it causes is so tiring, and just knowing you won't be able to do the things you should do causes a lot of guilt.
I hope it'll get better for you, you deserve to feel good💫
I really needed to see this. I have been battling with depression on and off my meds due to not wanting to have that stigma over my head and not feeling comfortable with taking the medication. I have caught myself not taking proper care of myself or my work and it’s affecting more than even so back on my medication I am going. At the pharmacy now to get myself back in alignment with the better side of myself
Kaiti, I was recently going through another season of utter numbness and apathy even after I celebrated recovering from depression. Sometimes I wonder if this is just going to be a lifetime thing. But then I remember that this present suffering is nothing in comparison to the glory that God will reveal to us later. How much greater can that glory be??! But I’m writing this message because Psalm 40 has also been anchoring me in God’s promises during this “relapse”. “I waited patiently for the Lord to help me, and he turned to me and heard my cry. He lifted me out of the pit of despair, out of the mud and the mire. He set my feet on solid ground and steadied me as I walked along.” Praise God that He hears our cries! Praying for you, sister in Christ!
I was diagnosed with depression shortly after I turned 14 and I have struggle with it for so many years. I’m 19 now and i still struggle. But not at much as my past self, who was in therapy two times per week. I want to be thank you for this video and for being so vulnerable. Depression is so hard and it’s so common and I’m so glad that we are starting to be able to talk about it more openly. ❤ I’m so sorry that you struggled with depression and I’m so happy to hear you are doing better now ❤❤❤❤
I struggle mentally as well. Life is difficult living. Too many problems. Im trying my best though. How is your journey going?
@@SSM12457dont give up,i wish you a wonderfull day
"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest" - Matthew 11:28. Thank you for being vulnerable with us Kaiti, feel better 🤍
i appreciate your vulnerability and i'm sending you so much love 💓
I thought you were quiet on here. Thanks for opening up, it's so common that there is no reason to feel ashamed. I'm not religious so unfortunately cant turn to that to help me
here i sit, with a broken kneecap, the sun is blazing and yet i sit inside, not really able to finish a task that i still need to do and not really being able to apply for a job though i reeeally need money. very relatable kaiti, and very good to see your ups!
Thank you for making me feel less alone
I’m currently on my deepest depression I’ve ever had
Hoping with time I’ll feel better 💛
i am praying for you!🙏
Oh girl so sorry for you, from someone that suffer chronic depression since I was a kid I can tell you that feeling lost and feeling that you don't see a way out of this will pass and the light will shine 💪🏼 I completely understand those feelings and are horrible and when I'm in the dark hole is hard to think that I will go through this and everything will be ok,but it's always ok and the future will be better ❤
the vulnerability and grace you continue to give is inspiring and amazing. sending lots of love to you kaiti! we’ve missed you on YT 💗
thank you for your vulnerability
Yep, felt this way for years. You summed it up perfectly: numbness. So glad you're doing better!
I’ve been feeling this way for a year and half. Hope better days for you. Your video makes me feel so heard
Im your follower for A REALLY long time and I have been here since almost beginning. You were always my first inspriation in everything. From style to your beautiful personality. You deserve the world and if u dont want to applaud yourself for your lil achievements I will!!
Girl please take your time, you have support from here! Love you so much I can't even say it in words
Appreciate your rawness Kaiti! You are lovely and so thankful you are still here 🩵🩵 hope you are able to seek professional help!
it's so refreshing seeing you take a step towards an organic life where you aren't pressured to sell your soul n health to money. the first time i saw you was 2 years ago when you made lookbooks! i can't imagine the the amount of pressure you went through the past 3 months but i'm glad, we're all glad that you feel better
You are so brave to record this. I have been in depression from a very long time now in bouts but from last 14 months the feelings of guilt, shame, fear, regrets and sadness are just constant. I still am ashamed of taking a therapy for this or any drugs. I was constantly told that Im only being lazy and procrastinating and Im not working to my best potential. I have no emotional and moral support and I feel so and so alone. Its scary. I feel hopeless and worthless.
Girl you've always had it in the bag, you just need to let yourself celebrate small and big wins, all things alike. Family stuff is hard and the mind is hard too. I believe you have a fighter in you so don't rush it, let yourself start one step at a time. If anything I know things will always align with patience. God is on your side always, love you lots and take care! ❤🙏
Thank you so much for making this
It took me a couple of tries to get the right meds, and that’s okay! I’m happy to see you celebrating small victories bc small victories are actually big ones when you’re struggling!
Creating the feelings of love is what has taken me out of my depression. It can work for you too.
THIS! Love is underneath every negative emotion, if you let it shine through.
How did you create yours?
How h did it? Can u give me some tips.
lol it kinda helps me at times too I imagine someone who cares about me and loves me and bam its abit better😂 im so embarassed
@@jaeminok8544 It is fine & good actually! Nothing to be shamed about having a comfort character who will give you the love you deserve. Your feelings are valid & real!
This was SO brave. I’m there now and this is the first thing that’s really brought me some comfort. Thank you for sharing this
I am so sorry and will be praying for you! Stay strong and know that so many people love you
I love that this is raw and real and you’re not out here pretending or pushing brand deals