“The talk” isn’t just one conversation. It’s a series of age appropriate conversations over the entire life of your child. Sexual health and relationships is a huge topic to cover in one chat. Can you imagine if you taught kids about anything else in just one conversation?
At what age do we start talking? Because I have a 5 year old and he thinks babies come from belly buttons lol. I don't feel comfortable correcting him.
They are doing such a amazing job not only the fact of doing it for the podcast but also them just being able to sit down and talk about what they have been doing in life and how there future is going to look like and the fun family things that they can do together they are honestly so good at what they do in life so huge shout out to both of them.
What Abby was trying to explain is that a woman can only have 1 baby in a year where as a man could get 100 women pregnant in 1 year. Just an example 🤷♀️
Yes, exactly, so if you want to prevent pregnancy, it would make sense to sterilize or limit the males bc they're the most fertile. It's just that women bear the "burden" of pregnancy, so the responsibility seems to fall on them for b.c. Male birth control has been in the works it's just never been put on the market and encouraged, I think. Never gets past the study phase of "men having a headache," or that's what I've heard😅 could be bias. B.c. should def be free. It's sad. Even my miscarriage without insurance would've cost $7000. To tell me I'm losing a baby. Fortunately, I did have coverage and only paid $500.
Every time I hear a wife say that their love language is acts of service I can’t help but imagine that it’s because she does the majority of the housework and the husband doesn’t realize this.
It's my love language, but I don't have a husband yet. It just makes me feel good, see them as coming from a good-hearted place, and supported. It has zero to do with housework since I've never lived with anyone I've dated, yet it will probably remain my love language in marriage irrespective of what my partner does/doesn't do around the house.
I see what Matt was saying about the birth control for men. I think he was trying to say that men are constantly fertile and women aren’t. I see what he is saying, but Abby was saying that women’s bodies are constantly changing hormones for the process of being fertile which makes it difficult to control versus men’s hormones being more stable. Definitely hard to say who would be more easier to control but I love how Matt is so open to taking on male birth control responsibility! There needs to be more partners like Matt that think the responsibility should fall equally on both partners. Love your episodes!
Its actually easier to control mens hormones, but till recently there wasnt a incentive to reserch a male birth control, because doctors think its a womans problem. We tecnically would be able to already have a pill because the tech is already here, but the amount of side effects is too high (it nor even half of the ammount of side effects of the womans) for men to actually buy and use. I believe in the next 3 years we will have some other options (even some vacines are being tested)
There was a 2016 article in NPR about a men’s birth control trial that was conducted by the WHO- apparently the the trials initial results were at 96% success rate but they ended the trial in stage II because “there were too many side effects” for participants and many dropped out. The side effects were the same as women’s birth control - depression, weight gain, acne, mood swings, etc. There are a few new trials going based on a quick google search though
With sperm count going down now and more I'm not sure if it's a good idea. I know it's not right for the burden to be on women only, but it's definitely harder for many couples to get pregnant nowadays so I'm not sure what the best idea is
It’s so awesome to hear someone so young talk about medical bills. I was a single mom of 2 and very young. I worked my tail off and accepted all overtime because of the medical bills. I think most parents aren’t prepared for this part of parenting. I think it’s great for you guys to put it out there for people to recognize 😊❤thanks unplanned!
Anesthesia should definitely be an option and be offered! People have different pain tolerance levels. Some people barely feel it, and some pass out because it's so severe!
Anesthesia is not as safe as you think it is! It is unnecessary for that procedure! People can handle pain for a little bit of time! Did you know there is a risk of death every time someone goes under anesthesia???????
@@Spooky_G647 anesthesia comes with a risk of death, that is why they won't do it in America! It is not necessary for that procedure! Even if it is very painful, it doesn't last long, and we as a society for some reason feel we should never feel pain, and that is just not realistic.. this is life.. it comes with pain!
@@Spooky_G647 You said it's hard to get in the US, and I was addressing that! I can address part or all of your comment if I choose, but now I will address the rest of your comment! It makes no difference whether you have had Csection or vaginal birth when it comes to the pain.. it depends on how sensitive the womans cervix is! Even with having a csection, you can still have immense pain if your cervix is very sensitive! People are informed.. most of them DONT LISTEN! For example, people are told before surgery there is a chance of death with anesthesia, but I could ask numerous people who have had surgery if they know that, and they would say no! People sign paperwork without even reading it! If people want to know, THEY CAN ASK QUESTIONS! It's not up to the doctor to fully educate you! People need to research and educate themselves!
@@truthtalker4038 that’s true for general anesthesia but not local, which is what would be used in this case. Lidocaine would be injected into the cervix, which is the same thing that is used in dental procedures
I’m glad Abby had a good experience. Unfortunately my experience with the iud was extremely painful, I would get random stabbing pains in my uterus and bled for 2 months straight. after that I got it removed. Crazy how iud is the most polarizing experience ever
Some people have cystic pain for months. My first child was an IUD baby. Let me tell you, that was a shock. When the doctor tells you to use alternative protection until the IUD is checked, do it. Love my daughter!
I got the Mirena IUD six years ago during my last year of grad school and the insertion did NOT go smoothly. The doctor couldn't get it in, and had to call for reinforcements half way through. The painful 30 seconds you experienced was more like 30 minutes for me. I also drove myself, and when I got back into my car I burst out in tears in the parking lot. I spent the rest of the day with what felt like terrible period cramps on the couch. THAT SAID - I have never looked back. No periods for years, then the lightest ones ever. I haven't bought pads or tampons in years. I have my OBGYN check for the IUD each year, and sometimes get an internal ultrasound to be SUPER sure it's where it should be. Mirena was thought to be effective for five years when I got it, but now they've proven it works for eight, which is SO nice because I thought I was going to need a new one last year. Highly recommend, ONE bad day for EIGHT YEARS of no/ light periods and effective birth control!
I 100% agree! I love having an IUD. Its literally the best. One bad day for 5 years of no period! ❤❤❤ just to clarify everyone is different and what works for one person may not work for everyone!! Please dont take any of the comments as medical advice! ^^^general message for everyone!!!
I'm glad you've had a good experience. I have not have had severe panic attacks since I've gotten it, brain fog mood swings. I just have not felt like myself and shortly after I got it
@Julia- I have had 5 Mirenas and only one was less than great going in but… I also didn’t have my . at the time and all of the other times I did. I’ve had 3 different OBGYN’s all say that it goes in easier if we have our . I would have to agree with them.
@@ashleystrand997similar here except my 3 year was just fine then after the kyleena this stuff kind of snuck up on me and spent years wondering why I was so incompetent and mentally unstable Then I realized everything started a couple months in with a slighter higher dose iud go figure Will never be anti iud but people have to know it's not one size fits all and the holy grail for some just won't be the same for others
Remember there is an IUD that is non hormonal, it's a GREAT option, it's the paragard and I've used it every time after my pregnancies! Never had any issues :)
Good for those who had kids before. I know Abby has had kids but I got paragard before I had kids (still don’t have kids) and it was so painful (it’s larger than hormonal and not recommended unless you have kids which of course they didn’t mention that to me) and it perforated my uterus. I almost ended up having to get a follopian tube out. Thankfully not because I do want kids and that would decrease my chances of getting pregnant.
Enjoy life now! Although there are people that hike and camp with their babies, toddlers. So......also enjoying each and every moment. We thought we would have another baby, we were getting our son ready(bought him a baby doll). Then my husband was diagnosed with Non-Hotchkins Lymphoma, survived a year and five days after diagnosis, passing away at 43 yrs young when our son was 4 yrs old. Each day is a gift, living in the future is surpassing the present, which is a true gift!
2 years into my IUD, I started having autoimmune symptoms and inflammation throughout my body. Elevated inflammation blood levels. Long story short, took my IUD out and it corrected on its own. Found research at the time to back it up but there’s something about the 2 year mark that bodies can start to reject it. Btw love following all yals success so early in adulthood!
It causes your body to be in a constant state of inflammation, hormonal ones are horrible if you have PCOS or other reproductive issues and copper ones can cause copper and heavy metal poisoning too
As a nursing mama I came to this conclusion yesterday and it helped me with my patience as we are BF every 30 mins.. Abby said "I just wanted to be comforted!" I feel this way with my spouse and our baby feels that way with me ❤❤ so when nothing gets done... it's worth it.
OH MY GOSH THAT WOULD BE AMAZING LIKE HIM EXPLAING THE BEHIND THE SCENES OF SOME OF HIS VIDEOS AND HOW HE GETS HIS VIDEO IDEAS AND WHAT HE DOES ON AND DAILY BASES AND WHAT SHE DOES ALSO THAT WOULD BE SUCH A GREAT VIDEO AND IT WOULD GET SO MANY VIEWS ALSO GREAT IDEA.
I appreciate how honest you guys are and especially Matt’s curiosity about Abby’s experience. I hope this encourages more men to have such open conversations with their partners.
My jaw hit the floor at the price of the IUD! Free for anyone under 21 in aus, or any age with a low income card and then $50 USD out of pocket for anyone else in Australia. Totally agree with Matt, should be free for everyone at anytime 😢❤ love you both so much and the pod❤
Yep totally agree. Any basic health care in the US is just unjustified price wise. Our healthcare system is set up where they don't necessarily want us getting sick, whereas the US their system is profit off of it
NOTHING is free! It is paid for by tax dollars!!! We are already way overtaxxed!!! Americans get money taken out of their checks and their money is sent to support other countries!!! NO ONE is sending AMERICANS money, but we help support everyone else!
@@teeandkids937WHAAAAT???? Are u serious? Do you have to pay for any form of contraception then?? Wow I'm I'm the UK everything is free .just hit home just how lucky I am.thats terrible 😢
I paid roughly 400€ here in Germany (we have health insurance). 200 for the IUD, 200 for the doctor to put it in place. I think in France (where I'm from) the health insurance takes care of it.
Abby thank you for saying you had light bleeding for a month after your IUD because I got mine 2 weeks ago and I’ve been stressed even though they said it’s normal.
I bled for 10 months with mine but my best friend bled for 3 weeks and never had another period while she had it. Her and I even had the same type put in. I eventually had to get mine taken out because it started to implant into my uterus and I got pregnant with my second baby. Mine was NOT the normal experience and I feel like my best friend's experience was closer to normal. I hope you feel better, honey 🫶
Regarding Natural Family Planning, I would encourage anyone wanting to use it to look into learning a legitimate method with an instructor! And not just rely on an app. Those are useful though, and if you’re not super concerned, go for it. If used perfectly with an actual method, effectiveness rates for preventing pregnancy are around 99% for some methods and with typical use can be around 96-98% also. And it’s generally good for people to learn how their body works, imo. Can alert you to issues you might not be aware of and is much healthier in general. But yes. You do have to be disciplined! 😂
If you track your cycle it’s free and it’s just as effective! Plus you don’t get pumped full of hormones! That’s what me and my husband do and I highly recommend
I am switching to that but I 100% would not be doing it if I wasn't in a committed relationship and fine if an accident were to happen Even when we were in a committed relationship years ago we could not handle the financial/etc responsibility of a kid back then so I don't regret it while I was younger as a more solid guarantee That being said i am so happy there are methods that are just about as effective because hormones did me dirty (but worth the peace of mind for the years I did have it)
Highly recommend reading "Taking Charge of Your Fertility" and researching hormonal birth control more. I've used this method for a while and its helped us conceive 5 beautiful kiddos and also prevent pregnancy. I also like how it also involves my husband in the process bc we need to chat about where I'm at in my cycle! Just some thoughts. Blessings to you guys!
I’m on my second Kyleena. The first one hurt so much, the second one I got they gave me local anesthetic and it was so much better! I don’t get a period either. To anyone reading, try to find a clinic with a sliding fee scale if youre worried about cost ❤️ there are options!
Unfortunately, there any many women becoming clinically depressed because when your body stops producing progesterone through the use of IUD’s, you become hormonally imbalanced. I know this firsthand. Pharma owns this country and pays doctors to push their agendas. Western medicine doctors treat patients, but don’t know how to heal them. Women my age (peri-menopausal), are learning these things right in the thick of it, when our bodies are going thru enormous changes, causing psychological issues. I hope the next generations learn this before it becomes incredibly hard to treat.❤
I only just even learnt the word perimenopausal as a 33 year old who has been on 10+ types of bc since 15 and often skipped breakthrough bleeding on depo or skipping sugar pills. But now I haven't had a period in 2+years at first I was happy having endo it was a nice break but now it has become worrisome. Really good point about how the lack of me producing that hormone could be contributing to my mental health issues and depression.
I agree, I wish hormonal birth control wasn't pushed so hard and we openly talked about the negatives down the line. I was put on bc pill by my Dr for painful periods at 13. I wasn't even sexually active for 5years after that. I came off it and it took me 2years to conceived my daughter but then 7years and as many losses to conceive my son
Since the Affordable Care Act (ACA) was passed in 2010, most health insurance companies have been required to cover birth control at no copay in their plans. It's insane that they charged you so much!
Abby, you can set an alarm on your phone to remind you to take your iron or any meds. Try that, I can't stand knowing you're feeling so tired when you can do something about it. It's really important. I love you guys and your videos ❤❤
I look forward to this podcast every Weds. Haven't watched it yet, just wanted to say that. I'll give my IUD experiences.... After my 1st son 23yrs ago i I had the copper iud for a few years (Mirena was not yet on the market). The copper gave me heavy periods, but it prevented pregnancy. When Mirena came on the market I tried that. A few days in I started to experience sharp shooting pains in my right lower abdomen. It's got so bad I had to leave work and have it taken out at the ER (that was an experience in itself). Three years ago I divorced my abusive husband after 10yrs of raising his kids full time (I still consider them mine). I then got the copper iud again. 6 mos after leaving my ex husband I got together with a dear friend who professed his love to me. He got poked by the iud, or the strings (?) and was in serious pain. I had the iud removed and was pregnant in a few months. My divorce was final exactly a year before my beautiful daughters birth. I now have a 2yr old daughter and a partner that loves me. All that aside, all the insertions were very painful and I would recommend anyone that is going to get an iud to ask for a one time script for a Valium to take before insertion. I hope this helps someone.
Wanted to add an IUD story…getting mine inserted was awful, I spotted and cramped for 3 months, had my 3 month check up on it. Dr said everything was “fine” and less than a week later the IUD came out…by itself. Worst experience ever! Dr even said she’s never had a patient that and IUD has come out. It is sooo rare.
Love listening to guys while Im at work makes the time go by faster. Your happy with what you get, you don’t know any better if you have only had boys or only girls. We had two boys first and we were happy we got pregnant with our 3rd and it was a baby girl and we are so happy we get to enjoy both having boys and now a girl. My husband loves his daughter he is so happy he gets to enjoy having a daddy’s girl. He finally got snipped snipped we are 30 years old with 3 kids and we are done.
@@dibsdibs3495you just made my day. I’m in the hospital with a severe migraine attack (I get stroke-like symptoms that are VERY scary! Including “word salad” speech, loss of vision, confusion and at times even paralysis on one side! SCARY!). I saw this comment and wanted to reply… then I saw YOUR comment. I’m still giggling 🤭 ❤ 😂
I’m 40 years old & I STILL hide my panties 😂 I’ve dealt with endometriosis and PCOS since I was 13. Up until 4 years ago when I found out I had cervical, ovarian AND uterine cancer and had to have a radical hysterectomy. My point of the trauma dump is it doesn’t matter how close you and your dr are, how many times you’ve undressed in front of said dr, females will ALWAYS hide the panties 😂 I do the same when I get a bikini wax… I don’t know why, but I ALWAYS. HIDE. THE UNDIES! 😂 Loved this episode! ❤
My oldest daughters OB pushed her IUD right through her uterine wall. Despite telling the doctor how much pain she was in, she was told it was normal for some women and that she'd be totally fine in a day or two. A little more than 24 hrs later she went to the ER because the pain was so out of control, she had a fever and was vomiting. She had to have surgery to have it removed from her abdominal cavity and repair the injury to her uterus. There was no legal recourse due to the the waiver they make you sign beforehand. Financially it cost her $24,000 between her deductable and cost shares. It was a nightmare.
Attorney here: that’s considered medical malpractice and you can always sue in those kinds of situations. *This is not legal advice and you should always consult with an attorney familiar with your situation to ensure you’re covering all your bases.
Thank you so much about talking about IUD's and Birth control! It's such a an important subject! In the UK where I'm from, Birth control is free which is awesome. I have since moved to Canada and the limitation on birth control is crazy. My normal pill wasn't available and the dr was rubbish. Luckily they referred me to the gynecologist and the offered the Mirena IUD. But still it wasn't free, I had to pay $500 and it wasn't covered in my insurance! But honestly my experience with my IUD has been awesome so far! The insertion was honestly really painful, but the aftermath has been awesome!!
I had an IUD back in the day when they could cause bad infections and side effects. I didn’t learn till after my kids were grown that IUDs don’t prevent pregnancy, they only prevent the implantation of the embryo. causing a miscarriage of the embryo. That kind of freaked me out.I was surprised my doctor didn’t inform me of this.
My iud messed up my hormones, made me gain alot weight. Then it fell out on year three, it was a 10 year iud. Then tried to have kids and it took us almost three years to get pregnant. You are so lucky you didn't have any issues with your IUDs
Natural Family Planning is free, very effective, and natural. You’re not adjusting your hormones or negatively affecting your overall health. As a devout Catholic, it has also been beautiful for my marriage and our family. While it requires sacrifices, it’s worth it. As others have said, I would highly recommend an instructor while using a legitimate method. Not simply using an app or counting days, but actual charting. Not here to place judgement, but the physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual effects of using contraception can be so damaging. I understand our medical and pharmaceutical industries as well as our secular culture have pushed a certain narrative, but I gently encourage everyone to look deeper.
I commend you both for your vulnerability in sharing your life and I hope you don’t take my comment in the wrong context. As I said, I’m not here to judge, I have just personally seen the fruits of NFP and want to spread that where I can.
I am 76 years old and 48 years ago I got pregnant with an iud. It worked fine for 6 months and it disappeared. 4 years later after I had my son. I had to have a hysterectomy because they found it after having to have my uterus scraped. It was imbedded in the wall of my uterus.
I love your sweater! I'm 31. I just had my first baby 6m ago. I've never been on birth control. I'm afraid of all that stuff. My sister has a iud in her arm and has a period for 4 weeks every two weeks! No thanks
Yea health insurance and medical expenses in America makes me want to live outside of the country. I’m overseas right now and it costs like NOTHING to see a highly rated specialist. The price differences and quality of services are crazyyyyyy
I’m so proud of the 2 of you talking about this! Women still lose fertility when taking hormonal BC. I know of so many women that haven’t been able to get pregnant or it taking years after being on BC. It’s so horrible for you. I encourage you to search out other forms of BC. Love watching the 2 of you!! Y’all are rocking this! Also, the reason why the self pay prices are different from insurance prices are because dr’s offices get pennies on the dollar from insurance companies. I work in the billing office of a hospital and it’s ridiculous at how little insurance pays. You send a bill for $2000 and get paid $40.
Curious what happened? Glad she ended up okay! I would never get one either they scare me! Foreign objects should never be in your reproductive parts..
Health share does not work the same way as regular health insurance. The money isn't there at the time of service. They choose what they'll pay after your visit. Yes, patients can end up paying more with heath share because the health share companies do not have contracts with doctors or facilities. Health share has to end up doing a single case agreement with the provider or the left over bill is patient responsibility.
So in NZ, birth control is the cost of a dr's visit which currently is $18. Children under 14 have free healthcare and dental care. Accidents are subsidised if not completely free. Operations are covered if you're not going private. Our healthcare providers aren't profiting off of us being unwell, whereas people are profiting off of the ill in the US
For some people may be important the fact, that IUD in its range of action can potentially have an influence on possibly created embryo if it comes to it's implantation (lesser probability od implantation)
Hey thanks for talking about IUDs. Definitely something we need more discussion around. I’m on my second Mirena and have had no issues, although the insertions were quite painful for me. IUDs can go wrong & have negative side affects & providers should fully disclose those. But I do believe out of the millions of people using them, the majority are happy. You can’t beat the effectiveness & not having a period can be life changing.
Highly recommend the book “E*aculate Responsibly” by Gabrielle Blair if you guys are readers. She touches on some of the things you were discussing re: birth control and male fertility, etc. in a really approachable and thought-provoking way.
I find losing weight while nursing so much harder! Some women lose it with the extra calories burned, but others your hormones hang on the those extra pounds. The weight fell off as I nursed less.
One of my coworkers got pregnant with an IUD and because she didn’t get periods she didn’t know she was pregnant until she started showing at 6mo! They had to go in there and remove the IUD while she was pregnant because it had gotten embedded! 😬😬😬 Her little girl is the cutest!
I didn't have periods with the depo shot and I would worry about this. I traded out buying tampons and pads, for buying a pregnancy test every month. It put my mind at ease, but I like the nuvaring so much better
As for the medical bills, ALWAYS ask for an itemized bill to be sure to contest any strange charges. Also, if you are paying out of pocket instead of using insurance most places will give you a flat percentage discount if you ask for it, but they won't just do it themselves. If you put in the legwork and advocate for yourself you can cut thousands of dollars a year in medical bills
@@katieeliason7055 You’re not wrong… wow, medical benefits could be so much better in the U.S. … One of the richest countries in the world and the citizens are in debt over medical care meanwhile insurance and pharmaceutical companies make profit?? What an embarrassing shame..
I work with kids for part of my education, and we had a three year old who said "Guess what? I have a best friend, and her name is *insert twin's name*" it was so adorable.
My first IUD experience was HORRIBLE. So much pain. I bled so much, the pain was a sharp stab and she took way longer than 30 seconds. My second IUD was after I had a baby, and it was with a male OB/Gyn and he did phenomenal. I barely felt it. I definitely agree with offering anesthesia especially if you've never had kids.
My IUD experience was and has been amazing! Try your best to find a good doctor because they will largely determine if you have a positive or negative experience. The pain wasn’t significant for me at all. Like Abby said, only about 30 seconds of pain and it’s done.
My sister (58) and I (56) never were blessed with kids 😢 and my brother never had one until he was 42, 5 years ago! My poor Mom thought she was not going to be a grandma. My Dad passed away 13 years before my brother had his son. So sad. Love Y’all’s podcast, you are such awesome parents. ❤️🥰
Matt free birth control is definitely the way to go. As a UK resident we get it free on the NHS including urine tests and swabs beforehand. Very thankful for our health service.
First time hearing your song, I immediately thought about surprising my husband at our wedding walking down the aisle with your song. So i would LOVE a SLOW DOWN edition.🥰🎶 Love to watch your podcast and seeing your relationship with each other!! THANK YOU!!
I lived in Canada for 10 years and even then your insurance paid for your medical expenses - initially you had to pay for your prescriptions but then you would apply to get the money back!!! In the UK I pay for prescriptions! This video is so interesting and very helpful!
I'm canadian and that depends. Most insurances have a drug card that you give and the pharmacy will do the claim for you and only charge you the rest of what you owe, if anything.
Matt and Abby have definitely given me a greater insight of adulthood, especially all the more complex aspects that are often untalked. Not to say, those complicated aspects are also what makes life so beautiful. Thank you for being so open and transparent about your own experiences!💕 /A confused 17-year old
Thank you for highlighting the issue with Healthcare here in the US. I'm originally from a "3rd world" country where pricing is upfront, in fact for commercial insurance or self pay patients you can negotiate prices if paying ahead of time or in full. Even for maternity it's nice to know ahead of time the cost of delivering bc you can save over a 9 month period.
Natural family planning can be extremely effective, but I agree you have to be open to the slight possibility of accidental pregnancy. It works the best when your husband is involved and he needs to fully understand the risk involved. We have NFP for over 4 years and have only had intentional pregnancies. Its takes more personal responsibility for both parties than any other birth control, but its the healthiest in my opinion.
Gosh, so glad you had a positive experience. I had one place 7 weeks ago and the cramping, pain and bloating has been unbelievable. Shocked it cost you that much for insertion. It's wicked! 😱😱
My babies always had the best smiles for their siblings. They loved their attention. I always wanted all my kids in my 20s but i had secondary infertility and it took 5 years to have another. I'm 35 and have 5 now. We decided to be done.
I just checked out Matt’s songs and…WOW he’s so talented! I found out one was actually recommended to me on UA-cam music last week, and I had no clue!!
You can always can ask for itemize billing too. Make sure you take notes before if you are able to because then you have documentation. It has saved my family money. And that was with insurance.
I talk to my teens about sex all the time, not my younger kiddos YET, but will for sure. I never got any talk and had a baby at 16. 2 of my kiddos are 16 and we have very open, and hilarious, conversations. By being open with them we talk all the time about only having sex if you are prepared to have an unplanned pregnancy because it could happen to anyone at any time even while using protection. It's not awkward or weird, but its effective. I was already pregnant by their age and both of them want nothing to do with sex at the moment. I told my daughter i would prefer her just ask if she wants birth control and 100% rather put her on birth control than tell her "just dont do it". Stuff happens, hormones are powerful, safe is smarter. Communication is key.
The original IUD’s were pulled off of the market for many years. They weren’t brought back until they became much safer. Nothing other than abstinence is 100% but I wouldn’t trade any of my IUD’s for anything!
My friends IUD got stuck and they could not get it out so they had to try multiple times to get it out. I had mine out within 3 months of getting it because the hormones were making me sick. You are very lucky to have such easy experiences 😅
Right I’m slightly jealous … I had one put in six years ago after my third baby and it was in for a year and I bled the whole time went for an ultrasound and it had grown into my cervix my ultrasound tech person was shocked I hadn’t got pregnant. My doctor yanked it out and ever since then I can’t get pregnant we’ve been trying for 5 years steady I wouldn’t recommend an iud to anyone haha
I got Depo Provera birth control shot because I didn't want the IUD and it nearly killed me. It has a risk of severe seizures as a side effect. I asked about all side effects for all options. Especially considering I have seizures as it is, they could worsen. And then I have other chronic issues to consider. So the doctor told me nothing to worry about. I go in thinking all will be great. Not having to worry about birth control daily would be great, I thought. And not having a thing put in my arm or uterus was great too. But I got lumps in my boobs, my seizures worsened to where I nearly died. Had to be put in a medically induced coma for a couple days because of it
@@auroralmoonelfI am so sorry that happened to you. From all my research I really think the depo shot is the most dangerous and affects your body the most out of any of the options. I hope you have a provider you can trust now ❤
@@auroralmoonelf with all the information right at your fingertips, don't blame the doctor because you didn't do your due diligence and research the different types! Doctors don't need to educate you on every single thing! You need to be your own advocate!
@@truthtalker4038the truth is you can have knowledge of certain information but still usually trust your doctors recommendation because they are supposed to have your best interest.
I had a wonderful experience with an IUD. Yes there's some cramping, but it helps with your period and you don't have to worry about taking birth control every day.
Way back when, before we had smart scales and body composition measurements, I get why people fixated on weight alone. Now I don't get it as much. I think measures like body fat % and visceral body fat levels are far more important than general weight. Maintaining a healthy muscle to fat ratio is more of a predictor of metabolic conditions for example. (no homo & no creep) I think you're both looking great, especially considering your packed lifestyle, 2x kiddos etc. Keep it up! Abby, you're demonstrating it's possible to get back into working out, even after hernia surgeries and a c-section, inspiring!
I had the IUD twice back to back so 8 years. Loved it. Didn't have to worry about it. Then I had my fallopian tubes taken out. So no chances at all to get preggo haha. So haven't had period in idk 14 years and won't for the rest of my life. Didn't mess with my hormones or anything. So awesome
Sorry for hitting up this comments section so much everyone! I just wanted to say I really enjoyed this episode and find the way you guys chat through life really inspiring. 🌟
I am 32, just had my 4th child, and just got an IUD for the first time. It was a little uncomfortable but it didn’t really hurt. I did have light bleeding for a long time, which my nurses told me is normal, but it was annoying. It is so nice not having to take a pill and worrying about it giving me 2 periods a month while I’m breastfeeding like in the past.
Hey, you sound exactly like me! Same age, same amount of kids and just got my first IUD too. Random bleeding is annoying, but overall it's been a good experience so far.
Free healthcare, in the UK. Coils, any contraception you can get for free. The issue is you have to book in advance. For example, I went to the local health clinic site to book a coil fitting, 2-3 months fully booked in. You can get an emergency removal by calling up for example if by chance you got accidentally pregnant whilst on it, very rare and they'll fit you in. The UK atm is closing down local health clinics, my closest one now is 7 miles away, it used to be 2.5 miles away no matter where I lived. I live in a busy city as well.
So I have to say pain is dependent on your tolerance your doctor and your body. My iud was EXCRUCIATING and that was an understatement. Traumatizing. I’m so glad yours was a good experience Abby but this is not always the case.
My friend had to get surgery to remove her iud . So big no from me after hearing that story . I've been using an app to track my cycles since i was a teen . Works perfectly for many yrs prefer natural bc. Used the app to track my cycle to get pregnant too. Your cycle needs to be consistent to use this method though.
I work as an administrative assistant at a private hospital in Spain, Europe, and here to have an IUD is 165 euros for consultation with the doctor + 110 euros for the actual IUD. I think it's a very good and pretty much affordable price considering other countries...
It is crazy!! That in America you have to pay for health care, I’m from Northern Ireland and we are so lucky to have the NHS which is completely free health care. If I lived in America I would be afraid to get pregnant or injure myself because of all the bills
love love LOVE y’all’s podcast 🫶🏻 i love listening to it in the morning or as i’m showering and getting ready for bed!! y’all do such and amazing job and keep me so entertained!!
Woman should have something for the pain whilst getting an IUD..different pain tolerance makes a lot of difference but they don’t give you that! I’m 39 and have 1 daughter (hard to get this one girl, I’m very thankful) but I’m thinking of stoping all birth control have to talk to the doctor cause I take the pill since I have PCOS and I’m anemic and have family history on cancer on the uterus and breast so I think all woman should research and ask for more than one doctor for opinion and choices you can make! Love you Dudes 🥰🥰❤️❤️
I suppose I’m just curious what your reasoning behind NOT supporting free birth control is? I can understand the health care system as a whole (though after looking at numerous other countries ability to provide this for their citizens, I tend to support at minimum AFFORDABLE healthcare for all) but I really can’t see the benefit for society of putting birth control behind pay wall…
@@sarahloohoo2312 philosophically, we have the right to consensual reproduction, but not necessarily to do it without the inherit results of pregnancy. There’s the question of where is the line when it’s for the betterment of society for government to intervene itself in providing a product for its citizens. There’s the aspect of the past 100 years showing the predatory nature of the birth control and reproductive industry on women’s health starting at an early age. Free doesn’t mean it’s good OR bad in how well it works. Just some thoughts. Personally, I’d rather be taught more about how to take care of my own body better and put the money into higher quality food or something.
I would be very careful with the iud if I were you. I had two different kinds and the hormones in them (and the copper one in the other one) affected my thyroid and when I started having symptoms the doctor told me it was in my head. So be careful, if you start getting symptoms get it taken out.
People forget 99.9% of PERFECT use (doctors put it in properly and no weird outside factors causing it to not be in place) still means out of 1000 people, 1 will get pregnant When you add up everyone on birth control.... that's still a lot of people even though it's a tiny percentage
Being a woman periods were the the bane of my life. My first period was at the age of 11. From my first i was so terribly cramped & this continued for each period which lasted 2 weeks extremely heavy. I would pass out at any point. Today many girls are so flippant with birth control. I loved it as my periods ended throughout my pregnancies. I had to have full hysterecomy at age of 30 due to my periods. Dont get pregnant to skip periods ladies today there is so many options out there.
Birth control should be “free”?! Nothing is free, Matt; you should know that being a finance major. Why should someone else pay for others reproductive choices? Should the people covering the birth control choose when and with whom the recipient of the birth control have sex with? Of course not! If people want to do the activity that makes babies, they should take the responsibility for the potential life that may be created. If there is an extenuating circumstance where pregnancy was attempted to be blocked or if there was an non-consensual encounter, then we can look at charitable help to support the child’s needs, like Crisis Pregnancy Life Centers.
“The talk” isn’t just one conversation. It’s a series of age appropriate conversations over the entire life of your child. Sexual health and relationships is a huge topic to cover in one chat. Can you imagine if you taught kids about anything else in just one conversation?
Wise words right here
At what age do we start talking? Because I have a 5 year old and he thinks babies come from belly buttons lol. I don't feel comfortable correcting him.
They are doing such a amazing job not only the fact of doing it for the podcast but also them just being able to sit down and talk about what they have been doing in life and how there future is going to look like and the fun family things that they can do together they are honestly so good at what they do in life so huge shout out to both of them.
right lmao@@xxanabananaxx
True! If you think it's a one talk and your good thing that's probably close to as bad as nothing!
What Abby was trying to explain is that a woman can only have 1 baby in a year where as a man could get 100 women pregnant in 1 year. Just an example 🤷♀️
Yes, exactly, so if you want to prevent pregnancy, it would make sense to sterilize or limit the males bc they're the most fertile. It's just that women bear the "burden" of pregnancy, so the responsibility seems to fall on them for b.c. Male birth control has been in the works it's just never been put on the market and encouraged, I think. Never gets past the study phase of "men having a headache," or that's what I've heard😅 could be bias. B.c. should def be free. It's sad. Even my miscarriage without insurance would've cost $7000. To tell me I'm losing a baby. Fortunately, I did have coverage and only paid $500.
I had 2 in the same year 11 months apart 😂
The best podcast episodes are the ones with only Matt and Abby!
Yes!!! Agreed!!!!
Agree❤love the guests but I don’t usually listen to those ones all the way through!
Agreed!
Agreed!
Agreed!!
Every time I hear a wife say that their love language is acts of service I can’t help but imagine that it’s because she does the majority of the housework and the husband doesn’t realize this.
Hey! It’s actually not true for me :) it’s my love language and my husband easily does 50% of the house/kids work ! 😊👍🏻
It's my love language, but I don't have a husband yet. It just makes me feel good, see them as coming from a good-hearted place, and supported. It has zero to do with housework since I've never lived with anyone I've dated, yet it will probably remain my love language in marriage irrespective of what my partner does/doesn't do around the house.
I see what Matt was saying about the birth control for men. I think he was trying to say that men are constantly fertile and women aren’t. I see what he is saying, but Abby was saying that women’s bodies are constantly changing hormones for the process of being fertile which makes it difficult to control versus men’s hormones being more stable. Definitely hard to say who would be more easier to control but I love how Matt is so open to taking on male birth control responsibility! There needs to be more partners like Matt that think the responsibility should fall equally on both partners. Love your episodes!
Its actually easier to control mens hormones, but till recently there wasnt a incentive to reserch a male birth control, because doctors think its a womans problem. We tecnically would be able to already have a pill because the tech is already here, but the amount of side effects is too high (it nor even half of the ammount of side effects of the womans) for men to actually buy and use. I believe in the next 3 years we will have some other options (even some vacines are being tested)
There was a 2016 article in NPR about a men’s birth control trial that was conducted by the WHO- apparently the the trials initial results were at 96% success rate but they ended the trial in stage II because “there were too many side effects” for participants and many dropped out.
The side effects were the same as women’s birth control - depression, weight gain, acne, mood swings, etc.
There are a few new trials going based on a quick google search though
With sperm count going down now and more I'm not sure if it's a good idea. I know it's not right for the burden to be on women only, but it's definitely harder for many couples to get pregnant nowadays so I'm not sure what the best idea is
@@naddee19 cuz it's easier to control one egg then there is to control millions of sperm
Birth control is evil
It’s so awesome to hear someone so young talk about medical bills. I was a single mom of 2 and very young. I worked my tail off and accepted all overtime because of the medical bills. I think most parents aren’t prepared for this part of parenting. I think it’s great for you guys to put it out there for people to recognize 😊❤thanks unplanned!
Anesthesia should definitely be an option and be offered! People have different pain tolerance levels. Some people barely feel it, and some pass out because it's so severe!
Im one of the folks who passed out for my first one lol. Luckily the 2nd one was a little easier!
Anesthesia is not as safe as you think it is! It is unnecessary for that procedure! People can handle pain for a little bit of time!
Did you know there is a risk of death every time someone goes under anesthesia???????
@@Spooky_G647 anesthesia comes with a risk of death, that is why they won't do it in America! It is not necessary for that procedure! Even if it is very painful, it doesn't last long, and we as a society for some reason feel we should never feel pain, and that is just not realistic.. this is life.. it comes with pain!
@@Spooky_G647 You said it's hard to get in the US, and I was addressing that! I can address part or all of your comment if I choose, but now I will address the rest of your comment! It makes no difference whether you have had Csection or vaginal birth when it comes to the pain.. it depends on how sensitive the womans cervix is! Even with having a csection, you can still have immense pain if your cervix is very sensitive! People are informed.. most of them DONT LISTEN! For example, people are told before surgery there is a chance of death with anesthesia, but I could ask numerous people who have had surgery if they know that, and they would say no! People sign paperwork without even reading it! If people want to know, THEY CAN ASK QUESTIONS! It's not up to the doctor to fully educate you! People need to research and educate themselves!
@@truthtalker4038 that’s true for general anesthesia but not local, which is what would be used in this case. Lidocaine would be injected into the cervix, which is the same thing that is used in dental procedures
I love how Matt’s the dreamer and Abby’s the realist. It’s cute lol
I’m glad Abby had a good experience. Unfortunately my experience with the iud was extremely painful, I would get random stabbing pains in my uterus and bled for 2 months straight. after that I got it removed. Crazy how iud is the most polarizing experience ever
Oh no!!
Some people have cystic pain for months. My first child was an IUD baby. Let me tell you, that was a shock. When the doctor tells you to use alternative protection until the IUD is checked, do it. Love my daughter!
Because birth control is evil
Abby you should definitely open a coffee shop! It would be incredible!
I would move there and work for her 100% 😂
Agreed!!
Abby cried in pain after hernia surgery! She said it was the worst pain ever!
I got the Mirena IUD six years ago during my last year of grad school and the insertion did NOT go smoothly. The doctor couldn't get it in, and had to call for reinforcements half way through. The painful 30 seconds you experienced was more like 30 minutes for me. I also drove myself, and when I got back into my car I burst out in tears in the parking lot. I spent the rest of the day with what felt like terrible period cramps on the couch. THAT SAID - I have never looked back. No periods for years, then the lightest ones ever. I haven't bought pads or tampons in years. I have my OBGYN check for the IUD each year, and sometimes get an internal ultrasound to be SUPER sure it's where it should be. Mirena was thought to be effective for five years when I got it, but now they've proven it works for eight, which is SO nice because I thought I was going to need a new one last year. Highly recommend, ONE bad day for EIGHT YEARS of no/ light periods and effective birth control!
I 100% agree! I love having an IUD. Its literally the best. One bad day for 5 years of no period! ❤❤❤
just to clarify everyone is different and what works for one person may not work for everyone!! Please dont take any of the comments as medical advice!
^^^general message for everyone!!!
I'm glad you've had a good experience. I have not have had severe panic attacks since I've gotten it, brain fog mood swings. I just have not felt like myself and shortly after I got it
@Julia- I have had 5 Mirenas and only one was less than great going in but… I also didn’t have my . at the time and all of the other times I did. I’ve had 3 different OBGYN’s all say that it goes in easier if we have our . I would have to agree with them.
You can have anesthesia to have them inserted! Just so you know for your next one!
@@ashleystrand997similar here except my 3 year was just fine then after the kyleena this stuff kind of snuck up on me and spent years wondering why I was so incompetent and mentally unstable
Then I realized everything started a couple months in with a slighter higher dose iud go figure
Will never be anti iud but people have to know it's not one size fits all and the holy grail for some just won't be the same for others
Remember there is an IUD that is non hormonal, it's a GREAT option, it's the paragard and I've used it every time after my pregnancies! Never had any issues :)
Good for those who had kids before. I know Abby has had kids but I got paragard before I had kids (still don’t have kids) and it was so painful (it’s larger than hormonal and not recommended unless you have kids which of course they didn’t mention that to me) and it perforated my uterus. I almost ended up having to get a follopian tube out. Thankfully not because I do want kids and that would decrease my chances of getting pregnant.
Paragard made me bleed for two months straight, I have the arm one now and it's great.
Does it make your period heavy? I heard it can be really heavy crampy periods
Love the copper IUD! It’s the best. There are different sizes you can get really small . Called FlexiT here in canada
@@Carla_2428mine was the same periods, not painful. Different for everyone
Enjoy life now! Although there are people that hike and camp with their babies, toddlers. So......also enjoying each and every moment. We thought we would have another baby, we were getting our son ready(bought him a baby doll). Then my husband was diagnosed with Non-Hotchkins Lymphoma, survived a year and five days after diagnosis, passing away at 43 yrs young when our son was 4 yrs old. Each day is a gift, living in the future is surpassing the present, which is a true gift!
2 years into my IUD, I started having autoimmune symptoms and inflammation throughout my body. Elevated inflammation blood levels. Long story short, took my IUD out and it corrected on its own. Found research at the time to back it up but there’s something about the 2 year mark that bodies can start to reject it.
Btw love following all yals success so early in adulthood!
I also experienced this, had to take antibiotics and take out the Iud to fight the infection..
Birth control is one of the worst things for a woman’s body and hormones!
It causes your body to be in a constant state of inflammation, hormonal ones are horrible if you have PCOS or other reproductive issues and copper ones can cause copper and heavy metal poisoning too
Birth control is evil
As a nursing mama I came to this conclusion yesterday and it helped me with my patience as we are BF every 30 mins..
Abby said "I just wanted to be comforted!"
I feel this way with my spouse and our baby feels that way with me ❤❤ so when nothing gets done... it's worth it.
I just love how these two talk to each other like best friends still 🥹❤️
Matt and Abby + Ryan Trahan and Haley Pham = the most amazing podcast episode to ever happen
Omgg yessss
Yes yes yes yes yes
OH MY GOSH THAT WOULD BE AMAZING LIKE HIM EXPLAING THE BEHIND THE SCENES OF SOME OF HIS VIDEOS AND HOW HE GETS HIS VIDEO IDEAS AND WHAT HE DOES ON AND DAILY BASES AND WHAT SHE DOES ALSO THAT WOULD BE SUCH A GREAT VIDEO AND IT WOULD GET SO MANY VIEWS ALSO GREAT IDEA.
Yes❤
I appreciate how honest you guys are and especially Matt’s curiosity about Abby’s experience. I hope this encourages more men to have such open conversations with their partners.
My jaw hit the floor at the price of the IUD! Free for anyone under 21 in aus, or any age with a low income card and then $50 USD out of pocket for anyone else in Australia. Totally agree with Matt, should be free for everyone at anytime 😢❤ love you both so much and the pod❤
Yep totally agree. Any basic health care in the US is just unjustified price wise.
Our healthcare system is set up where they don't necessarily want us getting sick, whereas the US their system is profit off of it
Cost me 500 bucks 5 years ago and I’m Canadian with health care …
NOTHING is free! It is paid for by tax dollars!!! We are already way overtaxxed!!! Americans get money taken out of their checks and their money is sent to support other countries!!! NO ONE is sending AMERICANS money, but we help support everyone else!
@@teeandkids937WHAAAAT???? Are u serious? Do you have to pay for any form of contraception then?? Wow I'm I'm the UK everything is free .just hit home just how lucky I am.thats terrible 😢
I paid roughly 400€ here in Germany (we have health insurance). 200 for the IUD, 200 for the doctor to put it in place. I think in France (where I'm from) the health insurance takes care of it.
Abby thank you for saying you had light bleeding for a month after your IUD because I got mine 2 weeks ago and I’ve been stressed even though they said it’s normal.
I bled for 10 months with mine but my best friend bled for 3 weeks and never had another period while she had it. Her and I even had the same type put in. I eventually had to get mine taken out because it started to implant into my uterus and I got pregnant with my second baby. Mine was NOT the normal experience and I feel like my best friend's experience was closer to normal. I hope you feel better, honey 🫶
Would you say that it was super painful? I’ve been thinking about getting one but I’m TERRIFIED of the pain that people say they have 😅
It’s not normal. Birth control is not normal but gravely evil and against both the natural law and the divine law
Abbys hair is so perfect for her!! Love the new cut and color 😍
Regarding Natural Family Planning, I would encourage anyone wanting to use it to look into learning a legitimate method with an instructor! And not just rely on an app. Those are useful though, and if you’re not super concerned, go for it. If used perfectly with an actual method, effectiveness rates for preventing pregnancy are around 99% for some methods and with typical use can be around 96-98% also. And it’s generally good for people to learn how their body works, imo. Can alert you to issues you might not be aware of and is much healthier in general. But yes. You do have to be disciplined! 😂
Agree with this! If you’re a lazy instant gratification type person, this method isn’t for you
If you track your cycle it’s free and it’s just as effective! Plus you don’t get pumped full of hormones! That’s what me and my husband do and I highly recommend
You can only do that if you have regular periods. My period is different every month. But I'm glad it works for you.
I am switching to that but I 100% would not be doing it if I wasn't in a committed relationship and fine if an accident were to happen
Even when we were in a committed relationship years ago we could not handle the financial/etc responsibility of a kid back then so I don't regret it while I was younger as a more solid guarantee
That being said i am so happy there are methods that are just about as effective because hormones did me dirty (but worth the peace of mind for the years I did have it)
I had the worst experience with my IUD I was bawling. I think everyone is super different but for me personally it was terrible
birth control is evil
Highly recommend reading "Taking Charge of Your Fertility" and researching hormonal birth control more. I've used this method for a while and its helped us conceive 5 beautiful kiddos and also prevent pregnancy. I also like how it also involves my husband in the process bc we need to chat about where I'm at in my cycle! Just some thoughts. Blessings to you guys!
LOVE that book
Yes! This is the best book.
Birth control is evil
I’m on my second Kyleena. The first one hurt so much, the second one I got they gave me local anesthetic and it was so much better! I don’t get a period either. To anyone reading, try to find a clinic with a sliding fee scale if youre worried about cost ❤️ there are options!
Unfortunately, there any many women becoming clinically depressed because when your body stops producing progesterone through the use of IUD’s, you become hormonally imbalanced. I know this firsthand. Pharma owns this country and pays doctors to push their agendas. Western medicine doctors treat patients, but don’t know how to heal them. Women my age (peri-menopausal), are learning these things right in the thick of it, when our bodies are going thru enormous changes, causing psychological issues. I hope the next generations learn this before it becomes incredibly hard to treat.❤
I only just even learnt the word perimenopausal as a 33 year old who has been on 10+ types of bc since 15 and often skipped breakthrough bleeding on depo or skipping sugar pills. But now I haven't had a period in 2+years at first I was happy having endo it was a nice break but now it has become worrisome. Really good point about how the lack of me producing that hormone could be contributing to my mental health issues and depression.
IUDs should be banned. Birth control is evil
I agree, I wish hormonal birth control wasn't pushed so hard and we openly talked about the negatives down the line. I was put on bc pill by my Dr for painful periods at 13. I wasn't even sexually active for 5years after that. I came off it and it took me 2years to conceived my daughter but then 7years and as many losses to conceive my son
Since the Affordable Care Act (ACA) was passed in 2010, most health insurance companies have been required to cover birth control at no copay in their plans. It's insane that they charged you so much!
You gave me confidence on getting Mirena. Thank you for being so opened and honest about your experiences!
Abby, you can set an alarm on your phone to remind you to take your iron or any meds. Try that, I can't stand knowing you're feeling so tired when you can do something about it. It's really important. I love you guys and your videos ❤❤
I look forward to this podcast every Weds. Haven't watched it yet, just wanted to say that. I'll give my IUD experiences....
After my 1st son 23yrs ago i I had the copper iud for a few years (Mirena was not yet on the market). The copper gave me heavy periods, but it prevented pregnancy. When Mirena came on the market I tried that. A few days in I started to experience sharp shooting pains in my right lower abdomen. It's got so bad I had to leave work and have it taken out at the ER (that was an experience in itself). Three years ago I divorced my abusive husband after 10yrs of raising his kids full time (I still consider them mine). I then got the copper iud again. 6 mos after leaving my ex husband I got together with a dear friend who professed his love to me. He got poked by the iud, or the strings (?) and was in serious pain. I had the iud removed and was pregnant in a few months. My divorce was final exactly a year before my beautiful daughters birth. I now have a 2yr old daughter and a partner that loves me. All that aside, all the insertions were very painful and I would recommend anyone that is going to get an iud to ask for a one time script for a Valium to take before insertion. I hope this helps someone.
Wanted to add an IUD story…getting mine inserted was awful, I spotted and cramped for 3 months, had my 3 month check up on it. Dr said everything was “fine” and less than a week later the IUD came out…by itself.
Worst experience ever!
Dr even said she’s never had a patient that and IUD has come out. It is sooo rare.
Love listening to guys while Im at work makes the time go by faster. Your happy with what you get, you don’t know any better if you have only had boys or only girls. We had two boys first and we were happy we got pregnant with our 3rd and it was a baby girl and we are so happy we get to enjoy both having boys and now a girl. My husband loves his daughter he is so happy he gets to enjoy having a daddy’s girl. He finally got snipped snipped we are 30 years old with 3 kids and we are done.
Love the “hide the underwear” conversation….I think all women do this. I know I do! 😂
I’m an L&D nurse. And I still even hide the underwear! Hahaha
Yeah I used to do that too but my dentist thought it was weird.
It’s more being back to you body’s shape, pre pregnancy…fitting into clothes
@@dibsdibs3495you just made my day. I’m in the hospital with a severe migraine attack (I get stroke-like symptoms that are VERY scary! Including “word salad” speech, loss of vision, confusion and at times even paralysis on one side! SCARY!). I saw this comment and wanted to reply… then I saw YOUR comment. I’m still giggling 🤭 ❤ 😂
I’m 40 years old & I STILL hide my panties 😂
I’ve dealt with endometriosis and PCOS since I was 13. Up until 4 years ago when I found out I had cervical, ovarian AND uterine cancer and had to have a radical hysterectomy. My point of the trauma dump is it doesn’t matter how close you and your dr are, how many times you’ve undressed in front of said dr, females will ALWAYS hide the panties 😂
I do the same when I get a bikini wax… I don’t know why, but I ALWAYS. HIDE. THE UNDIES! 😂
Loved this episode! ❤
I had the most horrible experience with an IUD. It's been over two years since I took it out and I still am dealing with hormone issues.
My oldest daughters OB pushed her IUD right through her uterine wall. Despite telling the doctor how much pain she was in, she was told it was normal for some women and that she'd be totally fine in a day or two. A little more than 24 hrs later she went to the ER because the pain was so out of control, she had a fever and was vomiting. She had to have surgery to have it removed from her abdominal cavity and repair the injury to her uterus. There was no legal recourse due to the the waiver they make you sign beforehand. Financially it cost her $24,000 between her deductable and cost shares. It was a nightmare.
Omg that is awful :(
Poor lady 😢 remember you can always sue no matter what you sign! They’re liable! Hope she’s ok now
Attorney here: that’s considered medical malpractice and you can always sue in those kinds of situations.
*This is not legal advice and you should always consult with an attorney familiar with your situation to ensure you’re covering all your bases.
That’s punishment for using birth control, an evil and gravely sinful practice
Thank you so much about talking about IUD's and Birth control! It's such a an important subject! In the UK where I'm from, Birth control is free which is awesome. I have since moved to Canada and the limitation on birth control is crazy. My normal pill wasn't available and the dr was rubbish. Luckily they referred me to the gynecologist and the offered the Mirena IUD. But still it wasn't free, I had to pay $500 and it wasn't covered in my insurance! But honestly my experience with my IUD has been awesome so far! The insertion was honestly really painful, but the aftermath has been awesome!!
Birth control is evil
It was actually really nice to have just you guys on this episode and no guests 😊😊😊 We love you guys!
I had an IUD back in the day when they could cause bad infections and side effects. I didn’t learn till after my kids were grown that IUDs don’t prevent pregnancy, they only prevent the implantation of the embryo. causing a miscarriage of the embryo. That kind of freaked me out.I was surprised my doctor didn’t inform me of this.
That’s part of why Birth control is evil
My iud messed up my hormones, made me gain alot weight. Then it fell out on year three, it was a 10 year iud. Then tried to have kids and it took us almost three years to get pregnant. You are so lucky you didn't have any issues with your IUDs
Birth control is evil and this is just one of the unnatural results of it
The Marquette method is an effective way to do natural family planning. It’s worked great for my husband and me!
I agree!
Natural Family Planning is free, very effective, and natural. You’re not adjusting your hormones or negatively affecting your overall health. As a devout Catholic, it has also been beautiful for my marriage and our family. While it requires sacrifices, it’s worth it.
As others have said, I would highly recommend an instructor while using a legitimate method. Not simply using an app or counting days, but actual charting.
Not here to place judgement, but the physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual effects of using contraception can be so damaging. I understand our medical and pharmaceutical industries as well as our secular culture have pushed a certain narrative, but I gently encourage everyone to look deeper.
I commend you both for your vulnerability in sharing your life and I hope you don’t take my comment in the wrong context. As I said, I’m not here to judge, I have just personally seen the fruits of NFP and want to spread that where I can.
I am 76 years old and 48 years ago I got pregnant with an iud. It worked fine for 6 months and it disappeared. 4 years later after I had my son. I had to have a hysterectomy because they found it after having to have my uterus scraped. It was imbedded in the wall of my uterus.
My mind m had to have hers surgically removed because tissue grew around it .
Wow! 😮 That's crzy.
Finds out you are pregnant during a unplanned Matt and Abby podcast ❤❤🎉 love that for myself
HOW EXCITING!!! Congratulations!!! So happy for you!
I love your sweater! I'm 31. I just had my first baby 6m ago. I've never been on birth control. I'm afraid of all that stuff. My sister has a iud in her arm and has a period for 4 weeks every two weeks! No thanks
An IUD in her arm. You people crack me up 😂 "IUD" stands for "intrauterine device".
Yea health insurance and medical expenses in America makes me want to live outside of the country. I’m overseas right now and it costs like NOTHING to see a highly rated specialist. The price differences and quality of services are crazyyyyyy
I’m so proud of the 2 of you talking about this! Women still lose fertility when taking hormonal BC. I know of so many women that haven’t been able to get pregnant or it taking years after being on BC. It’s so horrible for you. I encourage you to search out other forms of BC. Love watching the 2 of you!! Y’all are rocking this! Also, the reason why the self pay prices are different from insurance prices are because dr’s offices get pennies on the dollar from insurance companies. I work in the billing office of a hospital and it’s ridiculous at how little insurance pays. You send a bill for $2000 and get paid $40.
The IUD almost killed my daughters friend. They are so scary, I would never get an IUD.
Curious what happened? Glad she ended up okay! I would never get one either they scare me! Foreign objects should never be in your reproductive parts..
I think its not normal or healthy for a you g woman not to have a period for long periods of time too.Im praying it all goes well..
@@thehammersfamily3943wait you NEVER get your period on IUD?
I wouldn’t either! Our bodies weren’t made to have foreign objects up there! Not that pills are better but we need something 🤷🏻♀️
@@nolagirl2458you don’t need anything except trust in God. Birth control is evil and BC pills can and do act as abortifacients
Health share does not work the same way as regular health insurance. The money isn't there at the time of service. They choose what they'll pay after your visit. Yes, patients can end up paying more with heath share because the health share companies do not have contracts with doctors or facilities. Health share has to end up doing a single case agreement with the provider or the left over bill is patient responsibility.
So in NZ, birth control is the cost of a dr's visit which currently is $18. Children under 14 have free healthcare and dental care.
Accidents are subsidised if not completely free. Operations are covered if you're not going private.
Our healthcare providers aren't profiting off of us being unwell, whereas people are profiting off of the ill in the US
For some people may be important the fact, that IUD in its range of action can potentially have an influence on possibly created embryo if it comes to it's implantation (lesser probability od implantation)
Abby’s smile while taking about her kids is so cute
Hey thanks for talking about IUDs. Definitely something we need more discussion around. I’m on my second Mirena and have had no issues, although the insertions were quite painful for me. IUDs can go wrong & have negative side affects & providers should fully disclose those. But I do believe out of the millions of people using them, the majority are happy. You can’t beat the effectiveness & not having a period can be life changing.
Highly recommend the book “E*aculate Responsibly” by Gabrielle Blair if you guys are readers. She touches on some of the things you were discussing re: birth control and male fertility, etc. in a really approachable and thought-provoking way.
Birth control is evil
I find losing weight while nursing so much harder! Some women lose it with the extra calories burned, but others your hormones hang on the those extra pounds. The weight fell off as I nursed less.
Same here! It was so frustrating for people to say you'll just lose all the weight if you're breastfeeding, definitely not my experience
One of my coworkers got pregnant with an IUD and because she didn’t get periods she didn’t know she was pregnant until she started showing at 6mo! They had to go in there and remove the IUD while she was pregnant because it had gotten embedded! 😬😬😬 Her little girl is the cutest!
I didn't have periods with the depo shot and I would worry about this. I traded out buying tampons and pads, for buying a pregnancy test every month. It put my mind at ease, but I like the nuvaring so much better
As for the medical bills, ALWAYS ask for an itemized bill to be sure to contest any strange charges. Also, if you are paying out of pocket instead of using insurance most places will give you a flat percentage discount if you ask for it, but they won't just do it themselves. If you put in the legwork and advocate for yourself you can cut thousands of dollars a year in medical bills
Pretty sucky that Americans have to go through all those steps just to receive affordable medical care… wow..
@sarahloohoo2312 very true, but I'd rather that then paying thousands of dollars for something insurance companies pay only hundreds for
@@katieeliason7055 You’re not wrong… wow, medical benefits could be so much better in the U.S. … One of the richest countries in the world and the citizens are in debt over medical care meanwhile insurance and pharmaceutical companies make profit?? What an embarrassing shame..
@@sarahloohoo2312 for sure
I work with kids for part of my education, and we had a three year old who said "Guess what? I have a best friend, and her name is *insert twin's name*" it was so adorable.
My first IUD experience was HORRIBLE. So much pain. I bled so much, the pain was a sharp stab and she took way longer than 30 seconds. My second IUD was after I had a baby, and it was with a male OB/Gyn and he did phenomenal. I barely felt it. I definitely agree with offering anesthesia especially if you've never had kids.
My IUD experience was and has been amazing! Try your best to find a good doctor because they will largely determine if you have a positive or negative experience. The pain wasn’t significant for me at all. Like Abby said, only about 30 seconds of pain and it’s done.
Birth control is evil
My sister (58) and I (56) never were blessed with kids 😢 and my brother never had one until he was 42, 5 years ago! My poor Mom thought she was not going to be a grandma. My Dad passed away 13 years before my brother had his son. So sad. Love Y’all’s podcast, you are such awesome parents. ❤️🥰
I'm so sorry to hear that.
Hmmm.. Are you Christian?
@@basetsana1618 thank you. It’s ok, it just never happened. Why do you ask if I’m a Christian?
Matt free birth control is definitely the way to go. As a UK resident we get it free on the NHS including urine tests and swabs beforehand. Very thankful for our health service.
First time hearing your song, I immediately thought about surprising my husband at our wedding walking down the aisle with your song. So i would LOVE a SLOW DOWN edition.🥰🎶 Love to watch your podcast and seeing your relationship with each other!! THANK YOU!!
How much I appreciate Ab mentioning wanting to be spoiled ❤
I lived in Canada for 10 years and even then your insurance paid for your medical expenses - initially you had to pay for your prescriptions but then you would apply to get the money back!!! In the UK I pay for prescriptions! This video is so interesting and very helpful!
I'm canadian and that depends. Most insurances have a drug card that you give and the pharmacy will do the claim for you and only charge you the rest of what you owe, if anything.
Matt and Abby have definitely given me a greater insight of adulthood, especially all the more complex aspects that are often untalked. Not to say, those complicated aspects are also what makes life so beautiful. Thank you for being so open and transparent about your own experiences!💕
/A confused 17-year old
Thank you for highlighting the issue with Healthcare here in the US. I'm originally from a "3rd world" country where pricing is upfront, in fact for commercial insurance or self pay patients you can negotiate prices if paying ahead of time or in full. Even for maternity it's nice to know ahead of time the cost of delivering bc you can save over a 9 month period.
Another amazing podcast - I can’t believe that you have to pay for birth control - we are so lucky in the UK!
Natural family planning can be extremely effective, but I agree you have to be open to the slight possibility of accidental pregnancy. It works the best when your husband is involved and he needs to fully understand the risk involved. We have NFP for over 4 years and have only had intentional pregnancies. Its takes more personal responsibility for both parties than any other birth control, but its the healthiest in my opinion.
I’m 25, I have no kids, I’m not married, my life if very different then yours but for some reason listening to your podcasts are so calming💗
Yup. I'm also a '98... I dont even have a boyfriend and I love it here😂
Gosh, so glad you had a positive experience. I had one place 7 weeks ago and the cramping, pain and bloating has been unbelievable. Shocked it cost you that much for insertion. It's wicked! 😱😱
I haven't had any physical symptoms from it more mental. The panic attacks have been bad
My babies always had the best smiles for their siblings. They loved their attention. I always wanted all my kids in my 20s but i had secondary infertility and it took 5 years to have another. I'm 35 and have 5 now. We decided to be done.
I just checked out Matt’s songs and…WOW he’s so talented! I found out one was actually recommended to me on UA-cam music last week, and I had no clue!!
The end of sharing food 100% do it. An ounce of juice and 4 oz water works helps get more water intake in them.
You can always can ask for itemize billing too.
Make sure you take notes before if you are able to because then you have documentation.
It has saved my family money. And that was with insurance.
I talk to my teens about sex all the time, not my younger kiddos YET, but will for sure. I never got any talk and had a baby at 16. 2 of my kiddos are 16 and we have very open, and hilarious, conversations. By being open with them we talk all the time about only having sex if you are prepared to have an unplanned pregnancy because it could happen to anyone at any time even while using protection. It's not awkward or weird, but its effective. I was already pregnant by their age and both of them want nothing to do with sex at the moment. I told my daughter i would prefer her just ask if she wants birth control and 100% rather put her on birth control than tell her "just dont do it". Stuff happens, hormones are powerful, safe is smarter. Communication is key.
The original IUD’s were pulled off of the market for many years. They weren’t brought back until they became much safer. Nothing other than abstinence is 100% but I wouldn’t trade any of my IUD’s for anything!
My friends IUD got stuck and they could not get it out so they had to try multiple times to get it out. I had mine out within 3 months of getting it because the hormones were making me sick. You are very lucky to have such easy experiences 😅
Right I’m slightly jealous … I had one put in six years ago after my third baby and it was in for a year and I bled the whole time went for an ultrasound and it had grown into my cervix my ultrasound tech person was shocked I hadn’t got pregnant. My doctor yanked it out and ever since then I can’t get pregnant we’ve been trying for 5 years steady I wouldn’t recommend an iud to anyone haha
I got Depo Provera birth control shot because I didn't want the IUD and it nearly killed me. It has a risk of severe seizures as a side effect. I asked about all side effects for all options. Especially considering I have seizures as it is, they could worsen. And then I have other chronic issues to consider. So the doctor told me nothing to worry about. I go in thinking all will be great. Not having to worry about birth control daily would be great, I thought. And not having a thing put in my arm or uterus was great too. But I got lumps in my boobs, my seizures worsened to where I nearly died. Had to be put in a medically induced coma for a couple days because of it
@@auroralmoonelfI am so sorry that happened to you. From all my research I really think the depo shot is the most dangerous and affects your body the most out of any of the options. I hope you have a provider you can trust now ❤
@@auroralmoonelf with all the information right at your fingertips, don't blame the doctor because you didn't do your due diligence and research the different types! Doctors don't need to educate you on every single thing! You need to be your own advocate!
@@truthtalker4038the truth is you can have knowledge of certain information but still usually trust your doctors recommendation because they are supposed to have your best interest.
I had a wonderful experience with an IUD. Yes there's some cramping, but it helps with your period and you don't have to worry about taking birth control every day.
Way back when, before we had smart scales and body composition measurements, I get why people fixated on weight alone. Now I don't get it as much. I think measures like body fat % and visceral body fat levels are far more important than general weight. Maintaining a healthy muscle to fat ratio is more of a predictor of metabolic conditions for example. (no homo & no creep) I think you're both looking great, especially considering your packed lifestyle, 2x kiddos etc. Keep it up! Abby, you're demonstrating it's possible to get back into working out, even after hernia surgeries and a c-section, inspiring!
I had the IUD twice back to back so 8 years. Loved it. Didn't have to worry about it. Then I had my fallopian tubes taken out. So no chances at all to get preggo haha. So haven't had period in idk 14 years and won't for the rest of my life. Didn't mess with my hormones or anything. So awesome
Birth control is evil
Sorry for hitting up this comments section so much everyone! I just wanted to say I really enjoyed this episode and find the way you guys chat through life really inspiring.
🌟
I am 32, just had my 4th child, and just got an IUD for the first time. It was a little uncomfortable but it didn’t really hurt. I did have light bleeding for a long time, which my nurses told me is normal, but it was annoying. It is so nice not having to take a pill and worrying about it giving me 2 periods a month while I’m breastfeeding like in the past.
Hey, you sound exactly like me! Same age, same amount of kids and just got my first IUD too. Random bleeding is annoying, but overall it's been a good experience so far.
I just followed matt and his music and added his songs to my queue
Free healthcare, in the UK. Coils, any contraception you can get for free. The issue is you have to book in advance. For example, I went to the local health clinic site to book a coil fitting, 2-3 months fully booked in. You can get an emergency removal by calling up for example if by chance you got accidentally pregnant whilst on it, very rare and they'll fit you in.
The UK atm is closing down local health clinics, my closest one now is 7 miles away, it used to be 2.5 miles away no matter where I lived. I live in a busy city as well.
So I have to say pain is dependent on your tolerance your doctor and your body. My iud was EXCRUCIATING and that was an understatement. Traumatizing. I’m so glad yours was a good experience Abby but this is not always the case.
My friend had to get surgery to remove her iud . So big no from me after hearing that story . I've been using an app to track my cycles since i was a teen . Works perfectly for many yrs prefer natural bc. Used the app to track my cycle to get pregnant too. Your cycle needs to be consistent to use this method though.
I work as an administrative assistant at a private hospital in Spain, Europe, and here to have an IUD is 165 euros for consultation with the doctor + 110 euros for the actual IUD. I think it's a very good and pretty much affordable price considering other countries...
Regarding the 99.9% effectiveness, that def depends on how it was placed. My son and his gf got pregnant with one bc the doctor placed it wrong🤦🏼♀️
I live in Montreal, CA and mine cost $92 and didn’t had to pay the doctor who put it in because it was covered by our health care system.
Oral birth control is eatrogen based whereas IUD is progesteone so a lot of people have a lot less 'hormonal' side effects
It is crazy!! That in America you have to pay for health care, I’m from Northern Ireland and we are so lucky to have the NHS which is completely free health care. If I lived in America I would be afraid to get pregnant or injure myself because of all the bills
It’s awful. After giving birth I got a bill for $40,000 and I avoid the doctor at all cost because of the money. It’s terrible here
love love LOVE y’all’s podcast 🫶🏻 i love listening to it in the morning or as i’m showering and getting ready for bed!! y’all do such and amazing job and keep me so entertained!!
Woman should have something for the pain whilst getting an IUD..different pain tolerance makes a lot of difference but they don’t give you that!
I’m 39 and have 1 daughter (hard to get this one girl, I’m very thankful) but I’m thinking of stoping all birth control have to talk to the doctor cause I take the pill since I have PCOS and I’m anemic and have family history on cancer on the uterus and breast so I think all woman should research and ask for more than one doctor for opinion and choices you can make!
Love you Dudes 🥰🥰❤️❤️
I go back and forth on whether healthcare or birth control is a free recognized right. But totally agree with how weird the system is.
I suppose I’m just curious what your reasoning behind NOT supporting free birth control is? I can understand the health care system as a whole (though after looking at numerous other countries ability to provide this for their citizens, I tend to support at minimum AFFORDABLE healthcare for all) but I really can’t see the benefit for society of putting birth control behind pay wall…
@@sarahloohoo2312 philosophically, we have the right to consensual reproduction, but not necessarily to do it without the inherit results of pregnancy. There’s the question of where is the line when it’s for the betterment of society for government to intervene itself in providing a product for its citizens. There’s the aspect of the past 100 years showing the predatory nature of the birth control and reproductive industry on women’s health starting at an early age. Free doesn’t mean it’s good OR bad in how well it works. Just some thoughts. Personally, I’d rather be taught more about how to take care of my own body better and put the money into higher quality food or something.
I would be very careful with the iud if I were you. I had two different kinds and the hormones in them (and the copper one in the other one) affected my thyroid and when I started having symptoms the doctor told me it was in my head. So be careful, if you start getting symptoms get it taken out.
my sister got pregnant on an iud! definitely more common than we think!
was her exsperience bad or good what changes in her body and just her in general that she recognice changes alot of just some of the smallest changes
People forget 99.9% of PERFECT use (doctors put it in properly and no weird outside factors causing it to not be in place) still means out of 1000 people, 1 will get pregnant
When you add up everyone on birth control.... that's still a lot of people even though it's a tiny percentage
Being a woman periods were the the bane of my life. My first period was at the age of 11. From my first i was so terribly cramped & this continued for each period which lasted 2 weeks extremely heavy. I would pass out at any point. Today many girls are so flippant with birth control. I loved it as my periods ended throughout my pregnancies. I had to have full hysterecomy at age of 30 due to my periods. Dont get pregnant to skip periods ladies today there is so many options out there.
Birth control should be “free”?! Nothing is free, Matt; you should know that being a finance major. Why should someone else pay for others reproductive choices? Should the people covering the birth control choose when and with whom the recipient of the birth control have sex with? Of course not! If people want to do the activity that makes babies, they should take the responsibility for the potential life that may be created. If there is an extenuating circumstance where pregnancy was attempted to be blocked or if there was an non-consensual encounter, then we can look at charitable help to support the child’s needs, like Crisis Pregnancy Life Centers.