What to Expect After Going 'No-Contact' - Day 4
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- Опубліковано 14 гру 2022
- Join me as we journey the 12 (toxic) days of Christmas
Day 1: How to Deal with a Manipulative Mother - Biblically
• How to Deal with a Man...
Day 2: How to Not Let Toxic Family Drain You
• How to Not Let Toxic F...
Day 3: 7 Gaslighting Phrases Manipulators Use to Control You.
• 7 Gaslighting Phrases ...
Day 4: When You Go 'No-Contact', Others May React This Way
• What to Expect After G...
Day 5: Overcoming Toxic Thoughts that Run in your Family
• Overcome Toxic Thought...
Day 6: Setting Boundaries with Toxic Family
• How to Set Boundaries ...
Day 7: 7 Signs of a Covert Narcissist
• 7 Signs God is Showing...
Day 8: 3 Ways to Disarm a Narcissist
• 3 Ways to Disarm a Nar...
Day 9: When Toxic Family Uses Special Occasions to Reconnect
• When the Narcissist Us...
Day 10: How a Covert Narcissist Controls You Through Disorientation
• How a Covert Narcissis...
Day 11: 6 Signs You Need to Break Away from Toxic Family
• 6 Signs You Need to Br...
Day 12: How a Narcissist Interprets Forgiveness
• How a Narcissist Inter...
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No contact is a boundary that you set to protect yourself from further abuse. It is not punishment. It is a safe haven. It is forever. 😢
Beautiful!
But she says they will lash out at you & smear your good name. Maybe even be dangerous! Be careful ladies.
Totally agree you need to protect ur self n ur family.
I can accept the narcissistic people's behavior after enforcing my boundaries. However, I am completely flabbergasted at everyone else's support of them. It is amazing how physically attractive, charismatic people can get away with such horrific behaviors.
I feel you. They are gold to others
Not so good looking physically speaking...people do that too.
I agree, I just had a conversation on this today.
Yaaaaaassss omg
And because they're beautiful, they accuse me of being jealous. My spectrum brain cannot be jealous of the action of self obsessiin with themselves. I'm obsessed with... going to the thrift stores, painting, playing my guitar, Star Trek obviously, This kind of stuff.
The other weird thing is that my 17 year old daughter has way better boundaries than i ever have had and I feel guilty about that. I know I traumatized my kid because I used to drink but I quit 8 years ago.. And she tells me she loves me every day now and I don't know what I did to deserve her forgiveness.
I am grateful for it
Going no contact is def not easy. Been a year plus of zero contact w him and anyone he was associated w. It’s way better than being in hell w all their sick ways. Much love sent to anyone dealing w a narc or narcs. They’re awful but you can prevail and you should.
I bought a small farm, got a puppy, started gardening and got back into cooking.
You deserve lots of love❤
my dream xx love and light xx
Sooo wonderful
That’s wonderful!!❤
Omg awesome farm life is so beautiful and healing 🙏
You're doing amazing 👏
I am scared, yet I trust the Lord for protection. I am on 7 days of cut off. There has already been an attempt to smear me. Oh Lord prepares me for this. Let your grace be sufficient for me in this season.
avoid the pple that they know; make friends in other venues.
Eleven years of NC for me now. The way we should look at this is that the fake friends and flying monkeys will all show themselves to us. We should actually be happy that the narcissist has done us a huge favor by showing us who’s on our side and who isn’t. “You will know them by their fruit.” 🍇
Prayed for you!!
My loving husband gently showed me how I was addicted to the drama. So, like any addiction, you gotta go “Cold Turkey”!!! I did not follow his advice, initially. God allowed me to choose to engage them and suffer as a result. I finally submitted my weakness and will to Lord Jesus. He has delivered me from that addiction to the drama and I am fully recovered from it and have been no contact for 5 years!!! Lean into Jesus! He will carry you through!
How are you doing beloved? ❤️
"A title doesn’t give someone permission to mistreat you." Yes!! Thank you!!!👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾🥰👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾
Wow!! 💯
“ A title doesn’t make you entitled “-Kris
I went no contact and blocked him from everything, so I got no back lash whatsoever. All I got was peace and quiet, and I don't care what he's thinking or saying or doing because I don't care.
Day one, time to unravel this unholy mess. Please pray for me to stay strong and move forward.
God bless you, I'm going through it to .
Well said. I can identify. Amen.
you dont unravel it, you DISCARD IT. block them, dont call them, see them or anyone who knows them.
I hope things have gotten easier with time
My narc shredded my heart and brains through manipulation and hoovering. I felt I had no where to turn. So many wrong decisions I made trying to get away from the cleverly laid snares. Now, my Helper, given to me from Christ, teaches me everyday how, when, where, and why drawing boundaries is essential in my life going forward.
Bitterness will NOT take root ever! Thank you for your prayer.
I feel so bitter right now, it’s been5 months🫣
The truth that remains in your heart will make you stronger. The narc will get weaker on the inside. The truth will set you free ...eventually, over time.
Day 2 of no contact with my narcissistic mother. Praying for her and those in her close circle, but from a distance.
If a narc apologizes- MAKE THEM EXPLAIN WHAT THEIR APOLOGIZING FOR - this will tell you if they really mean it or not. I’ve done this & if they can’t answer that question- then they are truly not sorry !!! Most narcs will stumble for an answer or cannot answer that question at all.
Excellent hope this works
They ought to be able to explain why without being asked. If I have to ask, then I'm inviting them to tell me what I wanna hear. An absolutely sickening soliloquy to bear witness to, IMHO...
Thank you for this point. I went NC with my mom almost two years ago for continually testing my boundaries, giving unsolicited advice, and gaslighting, to name a few. I forgive her and respect her from afar. Cutting off her narc supply and codependency from me, her only child, gave me freedom.
I'm glad to hear that you're forgiving and honoring but you also finally have peace.
@@Kris_Reece Thank you, and I am so grateful for your ministry. Finding someone on UA-cam who spoke on these issues from a biblical perspective was rough.
Me too...been no contact a year now
@@baddriversofrva I'm a single daughter too, sometimes I cannot even wrap my head around the fact how ANY parent could treat their single child that way, EVER.
@@baddriversofrva Dr Les Carter is a good YT source too yet he's not born again in Gods Spirit.
I am praying against the bitterness right now.
I am there now aswell I pray to just feel some relieve even in my thoughts
Me2
The thing that shocked me the most was how all of my family rallied to their defense - including my husband. Our marriage has never fully recovered from it. I was the one who was unreasonable and everything was my fault, even though everyone had witnessed their behavior towards me. "You just need to get over it and forgive. We need peace." They were enabling the offender instead of defending the victim (me). They totally had them snowed with the empty apology. "I'm sorry. Are you happy now?" Stated with an eyeroll and a snark. Thank you for helping me to see the dynamics happening here; it helps to ease the feelings of betrayal.
Stay the course. Stay godly even when provoked. Pray for your abusers. God sees and knows. He will not be mocked by evildoers. You will be vindicated.
My mother says sorry all the time, but it's just a word and her behaviour always goes right back to how she's always been. They are expert manipulators and the older they get, the worse they get.
They do tend to get worse with age. :(
@@Kris_Reece You could do another video on the elderly narcissist e.g. on Proverbs 1:20-31 they will implode themselves after all. 😄👍
@@Kris_Reece Okay, thank you for saying that. I noticed this with my NPD mother and thought I was going crazy (as per usual in any relationship with them). She 💯 gets worse with age.
I found with my mother, she got, for lack of better words, sloppy in her old age to hide who she really is. Disheartening
Mine said sorry then hung up on me!
Been enduring narcs ALL my life!!!75 years young not giving up YET....as long as God is with me.... he's already done ALL THAT!!!!!
So true. In my case my toxic partner called all my friends in a failed smear campaign. He called MY closest friends - calling 2 of them up to 20 times in one day! Lucky for me, MY friends put him in his place!!!
THOSE are true friends!!
This is a Blessing strong true love of friends
God Bless
I am going through this with my oldest son. It’s so hard but it feels better not having to be bashed and berated constantly by him. He needs prayer.
I hurts when you've tried to love a person with all these traits the best you can and given all you can and you are made to believe you are the problem. After being left drained, you see other people enabling these behavior and they keep going on like it's all good because look other people are okay with them and loving them and you end up with nothing and you actually start believing maybe you were the problem because everything is going for them. But pray to God for healing, that is all I pray for right now 🙏
Definitely, what happens.
Also, remember, the narcissist will backstab and talk badly about you behind your back.
Always have . Always will.
she always did so....no loss
Never care what sinners think, only care what God thinks
I have had narcissists come back later after being disrespectful and act so sticky nice it was easy to see they were fake. Its the sweet/mean cycle, if mean doesn't work they will try sweet. When sweet doesn't work they will go back to mean until they don't see either working, then they disappear.
My 106 year old dad who is not a Christian is in his last days. I will soon have to be in the company of my narcissistic family. I am a born again Christian and that is another divide. Being an empathy in the mix is a real stumbling block especially when there will be so little of any realistic knowledge of what comes after the death of a nonbeliever. It will be my biggest challenge. I will let the Lord lead me in all things and button my lip. Please pray for my dad at this time of such urgency that he soften his hardened heart and call out to the Saviour.
so what happened
It’s been almost a year since I went no contact and SO THANKFUL I did so I can breathe and experience peace. The problem now is having the flashbacks and reminders that stir up hurt and anger. I still love them and forgive them. My hope is that true healing can come from the hurt and anger. Still, I couldn’t be more thankful to be on the road to healing instead of the constant road of turmoil and chaos!
I can finally truly focus on relationships with God, my husband and children. Thank you God. ❤️✝️
May God continue to bless you on your journey! Thank you for sharing
Recovery for any hurt... can take months, years.... With every breath.. you are freer!!!!!
😢 don't forget that the person you still love doesn't exist
This is EXCELLENT from a Christian Perspective. Powerful content! So rich!
Amen
Their grandiose mind never see anything wrong with them. It's always your fault. Period.
Oh, how very true...
Their reaction is the following:
*They get into an internal rage.
*They twist every story to make you the culprit & them, the victims.
*They dramatize & exaggerate their lies that they transfix them as their reality
*They'll destroy or withhold any of your possessions.
*They'll provoke directly or indirectly constantly, to get your attention or a negative reaction to enforce all their lies.
*They'll literally place any common friend or acquaintance into the Bush-Syndrome: either with them, or against them.
*And the list goes on...
I agree don’t ever respond immediately. They call repeatedly one after the other. It almost felt scary and demonic at one point. I went through a lot of scary moments!
Me too
We are not anyones punching bag(s) either they want to gang up on individuals
You are helping me so much. I've watched so many of your videos. I just wanted to say thank you. I was searching for Christian Counselor to help me heal. I believe God gave you to me. Thank you so much.
I have really prayed to the Lord for good counsel and your channel has came up and helped me so much with a family cut off. I have been gaslit and judged so much and its the hardest thing I've ever had to do. I have had to keep this to myself and work through it on prayer because there aren't people I can trust that have my best interest. I'm am so greatful that you have this wisdom to share and to help me. Even though you don't know me and well never meet but your helping me so much to proccess what's happening and to have the counsel I need. This is such a hard time and it has weighed me down with depression. Just having biblical insight and the knowledge you are applying to it completely helps me.
Tapping therapy (on UA-cam) can help with your depression. It's a free DIY.
God gives us a sound mind. Satan tries to remove it. God absolutely cares about your emotional health and we are told to get Godly counsel.
I have on 3 occasions because of three different traumatic circumstances. I can’t imagine how I could have gotten through without those people, who I know God provided at those times.
Now I am wanting to be that helpful person for others!
You're not alone. I'm going through the same thing.😢
God bless you. Yes. People don't always have our best interests at heart. They usually don't understand how bad things really are and the last thing we need is for our issues to be downplayed and not taken seriously because we did that to ourselves long enough. Praise the Lord you have Him! Looks like He is jealous for you ☺️ ❤
I have been dealing with this with my dad for 59 years I been alive it’s so hard I’m done with him he locked me out of the house without a eviction notice nothing he wouldn’t let me get y prescriptions nothing he was very cruel he’s moving a 40year old girl he’s 81 he said to me you make
E sick to my guts gtfo of here I been living with them since 2014 my mom was sick with cancer so I took care of her she passed away that left me there with my sperm donor he just got worse he’s cut my legs out from underneath me no one will help me with anything he even has my family against me I’m talked about he lies so bad about everything . I’m scared alone and don’t know what to ok slept I. My car lastnight I’m lost for words!
Thank you so y h for having these clips for all of us to watch and learn what we need or should do !
I Appreciate you , Jodi
How are you doing today?
Wow! You hit the nail on the head! Kris Reece - Jesus is using you in a mighty way. Please know your words and guidance have been not only validation for my actions via walking with God but also a relief to know I am not crazy. God Bless you!
One thing I've noticed since I am now aware of all the narcissist's in my life is they will NEVER come to you and initiate a conversation if they see you're upset. NEVER. I've not heard any folks on this topic mention this one
Yes! Once they notice its been 3yrs and you've moved on n ur happy WITHOUT them so they pop up out of nowhere n act like "nothing" n try 2 pick up the pieces without an apology or even better blame some1 else.
@deecastillo7133 in hopes you'll have codependent amnesia. No response. No Contact.
True. Never they never come to you to discuss any feelings when they know you're hurt . No issue ever gets resolved. And it's always my fault cause "I'm not being nice etc..." gaslighting . Again actions speak louder than words. Their actions show they do not love you... yet.. I'm married to the guy what to do... ugh
OMG! These teachings have helped me so much. The Lord has revealed to me that my Father is a Narcissist. Suddenly Everything in my childhood made since. Also you’ve confirmed things I felt Holy Spirit told me to do. For so long I thought I needed to tolerate toxic relationships to keep from being alone. Then the Lord showed me he was all I need, and he would make up for the loss. It’s better to be alone than to settle, and this is in friendship or romantic relationships.
I 100% agree and I pray that the Lord will continue to meet you in this space and love you so well! May He continue to be all that you ever need/want in this life and the next!❤❤❤
I recently had coffee with a lady that had been attending a bible study I went to. She seemed very eager to be my friend and wanted a soul connection very quickly. After listening to her story for 20 hours in one weekend and having her oscillate back and forth on how much of her story she wanted to share, I received a text in the following morning in which she obviously resented sharing too much and placed the blame on me for taking too much of her time, I cut the relationship. She had been born into a cult and been raised in it. I could see that she was taking cultish practices and trying to force them into her Christianity. She had a jekyl/hyde sweetness/anger characteristic. Later, I found out that she had tried to isolate me from the other people in the bible study by calling them up with these uncontrollable anger urges and then tell me that they were saying horrible things about me. Too twisted for me! NC all the way!
she sounds bipolar, wolves among the flock, for sure tell the bible study leader about this or she will do it to other pple also.
Interesting about narcissists & apologies. They apologize but it’s brief & they expect an apology in return. Don’t fall for their manipulation! Spot on if you don’t reply immediately to a txt from them. Interestingly, they have to be in control- control everything but they lack self control. They’re always right in their eyes, they know everything in their eyes & look out if you disagree- any self control disappears & rage erupts from them. Great channel. God Bless you all.
I am so grateful that you repeatedly note that heart transformation is no problem for an Almighty God. So many people seem to give such hopeless messages about relationships with narcissists and how it’s never going to change. Nothing is impossible with God! That keeps me going! Thank you for your ministry.
Thank you. Healing and peace are coming to me. For a long time I felt like I was crazy and no one would believe me. I have gone no contact with my mother and relatives.while going no contact the one constantly contacting me is my mothers sister she is an enabler and loves gossip.
I pray soon 🙏 peace n healing is on the way for me also.. peace be with you.
My eldest sister has never apologised for anything because she never believed she is wrong about anything. I am surprised to here that some narcs apologise!
Yes. I have experienced this with my Mother. 3 yrs ago, for 6 months I pulled a No Contact. I explained myself to my Father. He saw my side clearly. For 6 months, I sought counseling, because I thought...there may be a version that I instigated this. I did not. My Mother slays with words & power. It is an ongoing battle...but one that I do not meddle in. I make choices! I have learned not to stoop to cater....but to hold my head up & keep walking & not to jump when she utters a sound. I believe I am doing great at this. Knowing that I can pray through hard times & seek His guidance. & If I do not get anything...I make the choice not to talk to her until I know I have resolution. I do have to have boundaries. I acknowledge them & maneuver through just fine. ✌🏻
The more I watch on this subject, the more I realize how Satanic it is and the damage it does to such beautiful, giving people.
I pray for every person right now that is dealing with NC. I am about to enter it.
Thank you for your prayers and I am about to enter NC also! Prayer is absolutely necessary and will get us through. God has sent Kris to minister to us!!!
Kris.....you have total described my life with the Narcissist for 45 yrs. He died in Jan. 2022. His Narcissist Mother. "Thought"? That she was going to put me in his place to take care of her. 6months after his death apparently she "Thought she could rail on me to whip me into shape....she got the surprise of her life because 45 yrs of stored anger from me broke loose, and believe me it was not pretty. I discarded her and the Flying Monkeys in the family. I am FREE AND MOVING ON IN NORTH CAROLINA!
THEY ARE NOT WORTH THE EFFORT!!!
I AM A BELIEVER IN JESUS CHRIST. NOW I know how He felt clearing out the Temple. Praises to God!!!!!!
The "I'm sorry" is the equivalent of that hideous, itchy sweater that you're forced, through guilt, to wear despite the fact that it gives you hives and makes you overheat... "You'll wear it and be grateful!"
Nope, I grew out of that sweater! Merry Christmas to all who have as well!
I thank GOD for growing into an adult and being able to make my own, healthy and comfortable choices. HE is a good Father.
Thankful for Kris also, a good guidepost along the path.
Love the analogy of the horrible sweater! Is it one of those hideous Christmas ones lol!
This is such a truthful analogy! ❤ Thanks so much for sharing!
It’s been 9 months since GOD saved my life I been learning a lot under my pastor especially biblically advice on my situation I told my ex about the conversation me and my pastor had and she did not like it, the truth is I rather be more obedient to the word of GOD that’s more important.
So happy for you!
Thank you thank you for this confirmation! FINALLY getting wholeness and health in all of this at nearly 70 yrs old and divorced from One of these at 50 yrs of marriage!
This!!!! All. Of. It! I just left a covert narc, 3 years wasted to say the least. I feel more at peace than I ever have!
Dear Kris, I’m so glad I stumbled across your channel. Stumbled was a little sarcasm on my part because I believe it was directed by God. Since I began this journey on researching narcissism I’ve come across many good therapists/ psychologists who have given me a lot of good information. What I like about you is the biblical and Christian influence you use in your podcasts. You’ve been such a blessing to me already after only listening to a handful of programs. I’m not currently seeing a counselor but have come to the conclusion that it is a necessity. My wife and I are in a desperate situation. Since I started this journey I’ve had my eyes opened to the many narcissistic traits she has towards me, mainly the gaslighting. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve made many mistakes myself and don’t want to paint myself to be a better person than I really am. I realize the importance now of getting a good councilor, can you help.
I was accused of being vindictive because I "abandoned my mother while she is old and sick", only to later find out she went to Rome. As far as I know sick people cannot travel.
I went no contact with someone a few months ago. She put a note on my door saying that I had told her that I went no contact with her because God told me to. I never said that to her. This was when I realized that she had been easdropping on me and a friend of mine. However she didn't listen to the entire conversation. I asked the person that I was actually talking to if I had said that. He said absolutely not then quoted what I actually said. I had said that I felt that God was leading me in another direction.
My Narcissistic sister and elderly mother have become unbearable. Last straw for me was my mother physically assaulted me and left a 3 inch bruise on my arm. I am now in no contact for a month. My Mom posted on facebook a meme about all a mother wants is love from her children. She is now telling people I abandoned her. (mind you I have been a loving giving daughter to her my whole life, especially the past 6 years moved to live near her to take care of her).This woman is mommy dearest times 10 and my sister encourages her. No contact so far has been a relief and in my 60s realized I was abused my whole life but didnt know it. Thank you for validating that I am doing the right thing.
My Dad's been doing this for years and finally did it for the last time. Thank God I had the resources to move away with my kids who he never acknowledges.
I want to thank you for all of your teachings! It has driven me to self reflect on all of my past sins and dig deeper into Gods word.
My husband and I set our boundaries, and the narcissist set out to create a smear campaign on social media. First she stalked our friends lists on facebook, and then when we went no contact she started the campaign. We never fought back, and after time she stopped. It was crazy. She is my step daughter, who is in her 50s. My husband actually said no more, and enough is enough. It was a difficult situation, but as far as I am concerned, it was abusive for her to do what she did.
Absolutely 💯 . The worse experience I ever been through. And I am doing no contact. This is exactly how they behave.
God bless you. I am just now getting ready to go no contact. It will be rough I know but am now finally listening to God through Kris. He will help me and you!
You are educating me. I understand now
Kris, you are a genius. You nailed every aspect of the inner dialogue that a scapegoat/discarded person has with themselves over the Hoovering and eventual relapse into old behaviors that narcissist in our lives perpetrates when we continue to forgive and take them back, over and over again, only to get burnt even worse each time. You nailed on every aspect the actual conversations we have with others who try to guilt us into putting ourselves in harm’s way over and over again. These people don’t want to be the scapegoat themselves so, when things start getting sketchy after we’ve gone, no contact, these people start scrambling in a panic when they need their old scapegoat back! They don’t want to be the next “it” in the narcissist’s game of “Scapegoat Tag”.
😅yea...nailed...it ...all....
Let them rip eachother apart...
Karma is a patient gangster.
Scapegoat OUT!! 😊
Am dealing with one also and boy oh boy it is the worst so am thinking of going no contact
@@vanessamorey3812lol. I like that !
When I said I wanted to go no contact my narc started text love bombing me (this happens every time) about what a difference I've made in their life and how I will always be precious to them. I wrote back, "What a sweet thing to say."😊
I think they recognized that I'm no longer falling for it.
why did you even write anything back? DONT REPLY to him! BLOCK him from your phone and DONT see anyone who knows him.
@@Lauren-vd4qe That's exactly what I did 9 years ago. Not sorry at all. Life is way better!
totally! been there done that!! @@kombuchababy6542
Exactly what’s happening to me! They are INSANE!😂
This is happening NOW! I’ve been no contact with my mother for the last 5 years. Out of the blue she texted me from an unknown number with this scathing text. She’s trying to use leaving me money in her will as leverage! I have not responded and she has escalated to vicious phone calls and calling me bipolar and not a real Christian. My brother also has started insulting voice messages from an unknown number. I’ve blocked them several times. I’m so much stronger and now, I don’t really react like I used to. I praise God for His strength and grace! I pray for them but I’ll never want to see them or talk to them again. The rest of my family ignores me. Thank God for Jesus Christ and my blessed hope that I have in Him and my “forever Family” in Christ Jesus! God is so good! He sets the captives FREE!!!
Yes, this is precisely what my husband and I are experiencing!!
My situation was a little different, my narcissist accused me and a few others of talking Ill about her behind her back from “reliable” sources. When I heard of this (because they did not approach anyone just stopped taking to us) I truly could not believe that it was being said because it was not true. Because I stood up for myself and would not apologize for something I did not do, the narcissist cut us off.
This was so helpful and thank you for that beautiful prayer at the end. Prayer really makes a difference because the confusion and hurt is so painful. The prayer is the calm to it all ❤️
The relationship with THEM is going nowhere I'm DONE. I'm enjoying my peace and freedom by distancing myself.
Unfortunately, I'll have to let go of the enablers to continue healing.
I over-explained to everyone, the narcs, the flying monkeys, relatives, neighbors, on and on... I'm getting a little better, today i said rhat we don't see eye to eye and we've decided to spend less time together. I didn't say how much less or I needed to be no contact. I feel so much better being no contact from the toxic people. I have to stay away from them. Thanks for your concise Biblical teaching about this evil.
“And now, my daughter, don’t be afraid. I will do for you all you ask. All the people of my town know that you are a woman of noble character.”
Ruth 3:11
I appreciate how honest you are! Also, I chucked a little bit at the “flying monkeys” but I also nodded solemnly, thinking “that’s SO true!” 🙏🏽 blessings!
It’s been 5 years and 7 days since we moved out of my Absalom step-son’s house and were delivered out of their hands. He went no contact 4 months later after not hearing from us. Everything you’ve said is spot on. What a relief to hear the same things He has said to me from a Follower of Emmanuel. Thank you. God always shines light into darkness for me. Thank you, Abba.
I am getting ready to go no contact with a toxic friend - have known her for 18 years! Have had numerous times of no contact. But we always end up back together. I do this! I know now that God has been trying to get me to end this relationship - and am finally hearing Him clearly thanks to you, Kim. Ready to make this break!!!!! Have probably been in co-dependent relationship. Thank you for your ministry!!!
You can do it - I just did it with a friend I have known for 16 years and same things have happened for me. Exact same!!! You will experience such a relief and a weight off your spirit and joy! And I believe your friend will also experience joy. I believe mine is! God bless you!!!
Chris I am ready
so what happened
I recently discovered this channel. So supportive and wise.
Yes, much easier to manage when we know what to expect. Generally, I've found that holding my boundaries often causes the narc to go away.
One kept returning months n years later claiming to be a changed person. Nope.
So I don't care if he walks on water, I'm done. He stopped calling as he likely senses my resolve.
Then remember you are always in control of yourself and your situation. And your thoughts and your reality and your emotions.
Definitely helpful!
God is opening my eyes through your teachings, and i think its so bad right now because ive been ignoring the signs that started years ago that i can now clearly pinpoint.
Thank you!
So, I’m only 10 minutes in, and it’s like you are narrating a situation that my husband and I dealt with. If only I had known about this 15 years ago. This couple was basically using our Christianity against us and holding us hostage. They did all of the things you said, until it became almost stalker-like and creepy. I finally had to cut off all contact which was difficult because neither I nor my husband are confrontational people and had helped this family and cared for them so much. We had witnessed to them and invited them to church. Some of the people at our church thought we weren’t doing the right thing. They thought that forgiving means remaining close friends with someone. Two years after cutting off contact, they apologized to us which was so shocking to us! I told them that I had forgiven them before they had even asked because that’s what God requires if us. I told them that I just couldn’t trust them anymore, so we just wouldn’t be close friends anymore. They understand, and we remained friendly and cordial, and they have finally moved away. Thank you for this video. It’s good to know that we handled it right (even though we should have cut contact sooner). I also did keep from going around trying to defend myself at church when she tried to turn people against us. There were times I wondered if that was right or not because I sort of withdrew a bit from certain social situations for about 2 years.
Oh heck yes! Living through this right now, in fact!
Went no contact Tuesday May 16, untill June 10, 2023 with her knowing it. It is May19, three days later and she texts me say she thought she heard my voice on her mother's answering machine! Are you okay? You are right on the money, thanks for putting the truth out there!
No Contact Reaction: Always Promises everything I want to hear denies the negative things he has said. Said he didn’t mean it..
i.e. when he bought me this ring that I wanted he said sternly twice, “ I want to make sure you know this is not an engagement ring”. I knew it wasn’t .. but I broke up for other reasons.. when he begged to come back and I confronted him he said that’s not what I meant. I should’ve slipped the ring on your finger and told you I love you and I want a life with you…. I got back with him it’s been a year and a half and all of those empty promises and more have not come through. Who’s the idiot… me :(
Thank you Kris! Your ministry is so necessary and has come to my life in the exact moment I needed it. May God keep blessing you and expanding your reach.
Kris, love your teachings. I'm going through it right now....separation from classic covert vulnerable narcissist husband. He's classic. Everything you say is so accurate. I didn't know until a few weeks ago the name for this crazy relationship. I thought narcissists were all grandiose. Thank you for teaching such great information. God is working!! He's my Waymaker!
This is very true, they will prove it, Yes this is very helpful. They definitely will try to change...❤
So blessed! So happy your a Christian! I stayed because I am. What a mistake I made. What you are saying is exactly what I have been through!😢
Thank you so much, I have been going through a lot with my wife trying to be better but sometimes it doesn't work, but asking God to help me with my situation and guide me, thank you again for your support.
Thank you I just went NC yesterday evening. What a relief and such a weight lifted off my spirit! Yes, it is best for both of us! Mine was a good friend of 16 years. God has been trying to remove this person from my life for many years! Finally I have been obedient! Thank you Kris for your ministry and thank God for not giving up on me!
But most importantly, we all have our own faults to deal with. We don't have to live with a toxic person, but we have to live with ourselves 😂
Everything you say is spot on. I have been non stop watching, since I am dealing with this. Thank you.
Been through most of this stuff. No contact x 5years per her. She is aware and I'm waiting for the apology stage. Thank you for guidance!
I just found you! What a blessing! Thanks for all you do!
Thank you for this very important ministry.🙏🏼💗
Thank you very much Kris! I truly appreciate all you do! I am involved in another ministry and continue to send people your way to get the biblical solutions they need! God bless you richly!
I'm so blessed by this video. Its timely and on point 🙏
I went no contact with my mother this Saturday after being repeatedly disrespected by her. Spent years and years trying to communicate with her, trying to explain myself, trying to set boundaries, you name it. I sent her a last text because I respect her and thought I should and at first she gave me this half hearted apologies (not the first time) and then went ahead to talk about herself as if nothing happened. I didn't reply to her as I said twice in my text that I needed some time away for myself. She messaged me again on Sunday night, with all the "poor me, I am the victim" narrative and said "If you need some time away because you think everything I say is a disrespect, so be it. But I thought everything was ok. How naive of me" I don't think she even cared to read the whole message. I started questioning myself, I started feeling bad and almost went into a spiral with my thoughts, but then I grounded myself and made myself remember how I felt every time she would hurt me. But obviously I feel sad. I grew up in a lie thinking she was my heroine for keeping me alive...
Thank you Kris! I’m completely following what you are saying. This is happening to me today.
yes, I'm going through this scenario just now. It's so sad. The thing is, what I don't understand is why don't these people who have been told about you, have 'a word' with you? Why don't they ask you if this is true? Why is it you - the one who is being smeared - is in the dark? It's horrid, because you don't have any defence.
Thank you so much for sharing your wisdom with us. You are a God send for so many people. Thank you for helping us find our way back to peace without guilt. ❤
I love your idea don’t confront toxic with toxic. Speak in a godly way! Thank you! 🙏 ❤
Thank you Kris, it's like you know my personal story. There's some very painful areas you've touched on. You've really helped me. There's been times where you're made to doubt your reality. Yikes.
Thanks for helping me tremendously. Love your help in this area.
This is so incredibly helpful!
Man o man!!!
This is some Gooooood stuff!
Thank you for Blessing me!
Wow have you hit the nail on the head! I had to disconnect recently to a toxic person and she has done absolutely every single thing that you have said here up to the point of her starting a smear campaign. And I have been very concerned about that since the people that her and I know all go to our church. So this is really good information on how to handle that if that happens. Thank you!
Thank you. The timing is perfect for my situation. God bless you.
Amen!! Thank you for that prayer! It was just what I needed!!
🙏
Thank you so much for this,it was so meant for. I have gone through a situation just like this. I am so greatful that you have given me a real eye-opening. Many Blessings to you 💯👏👏💖💞
I am so connecting with this series! So timely during the holidays!
Me too long after holidays still stuck to Kris video and wisdom
Excellent content!! God Bless You!!
Thank you Kris!! This is so me . I needed to hear this again . Bless you!!! Lotta from Sweden 🙏🙏🙏🥰🥰🥰🕊🕊🕊🕊