having "the talk", relationship funks, and managing expectations
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- Опубліковано 2 тра 2023
- Welcome to part 3 of our advice series! In this episode, we answered questions you submitted via Instagram all about marriage, parenting, relationships, and hot takes. We had so much fun hearing from you guys so be sure to follow along on our Couple Things Podcast Instagram so you can send in questions for next time!
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please take this with a massive MASSIVE grain of salt 😂
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This was an awesome conversation! Thank you for sparking really valuable perspectives 💕
Mrs. East you are adorable trying not to burst out laughing at the end of your discussions about the talk. Yes, you both on the right track, both parents have to talk to each children multiple times in age appropriate responses when there are 2 parents, but single parents need to appropriately respond multiple times from their perspective and add "I wish I could give you the other perspective (I.e. if you are a Mom, then, "I wish...perspective from a Dad" and if you are a Dad, "I wish...perspective from a Mom".
Ending arguments graceful, you just have to apologise as quickly as possible and work out how you can do better and consistently working on yourself to end arguments well. But the goal is more important than the outcome. "We know how this ends, in marriage" helps me so much. Thank you for this reminder.
I would love to see an updated skincare routine! Adding in what you used during pregnancy vs after pregnancy would be an added bonus 😍
I love that you both have different takes on it = balance. You both seem to be great parents and humans. It’s okay to argue.
I adore you guys so much! ❤
Definitely agree with both parents having the talk. I see a difference in my Son's attitude towards relationships. Also seeing Mom and Dad so invested helps. I LOVE this podcast. I look forward to my lunch time on Wednesdays for these videos. Thank you for doing what you're doing!!!
Awe!! This makes us happy!! We are thankful for YOU!
I love your honesty with how difficult some productive conversation methods are to use in the heat of a moment. you guys are so real. It's refreshing to listen to this. :)
Great podcast guys. ❤
I LIVE for Wednesdays when a new episode releases, they’re ALWAYS SO good and insightful! Thank you for always bringing SO much good to the world! 🤍 Parenting and Marriage can be hard, but it’s much easier to navigate with a community/tribe of people who are going through the same seasons!
One thing that my hubby and I learned about disagreements before we got married is to find a location within the house they both agree upon ahead of a disagreement that’s labeled the difficult conversation chair (for an example) and it has to be close quarters where you are holding hands and such. When one of us has a difficult conversation to bring up we always went to that place. And calmly discuss it and it never turned into an argument because there was an agreement that we would calmly listen to each other and talk it out. Yes it’s a little harder now with kids, but because we built that into our relationship it has help us have a low argument married life. This only works if both partners are willing to do it.
4:45
Yes.
Multiple times, and age based information.
And regarding the intimacy more than the actions
Love the brush strokes analogy Andrew! Applies to so much in life :)
YAY THANK YOU!
Hello Shawn, "The talk" conversation that Kristen Bell shared with her girls is great. You've got to find/listen to it.
Arguing effectively is difficult in any relationship. Just remember to stick to the facts of the issue at hand. I will usually take time away from the conversation because I tend to get emotional and need to decompress and reflect on the issue and come back to talk about it a little while later...what does this look like, you may ask, well, it usually goes like this "Hon, I just can't talk about this right now because I am not in a place where I can discuss this rationally. Can I have half an hour to decompress and come back to this then?" Kind of like a time out but it works like a charm. I'm also going to say that anything positive that is said before the word BUT is null and void, so try to avoid doing that. Although, my husband and I are in a place where we really don't argue anymore. Whether it's because of the stage we are at in our relationship (married for 33 years, together for 38), or we just don't have the energy for it, I can't say LOL. I think the key is to remember to always be respectful when you argue.
In regards to pregnancy after loss, try not to let your past experience steal your current joy. Feel your feelings, but try not to borrow trouble; live in the present moment and enjoy your current pregnancy!
We used the series “God Made Me” starting when they were about 7-8 years old. It begins with a storybook about a child asking about their pregnant mother sitting next to their father. The author beautifully speaks of God’s design instead of making it weird and uncomfortable. It’s both science-balanced and Christian perspective. They’re wonderful and my children were never scared about what was happening to their bodies because we read about how God made them that way: periods, erections, sex, babies, and respect throughout the whole process because we are all fearfully and wonderfully made. 🥰🙌🏻
I'm not Married yet but I'm listening and soaking up the info you both are giving 💯
PSST ALL the principles work in nearly ALL relationships. Conflict Resolution skills apply to other relationships with family members, work friends...everywhere
Hope you get married soon, but to the person for you. It is a lot of work, so choose someone who you are comfortable being you around. That is a big take away from the East Fam. I wish all the happiness in the world.
I had to give my son the talk because his Dad wouldn’t. Mind you we were not together and he lived in a different state. Giving my son the deets on what happens to a woman and her body was eye opening to him. What his friends talked about and thought was right was WAY WRONG! More information isn’t necessarily bad in this arena.
It is also part of the respect discussion of one’s body and another’s body.
You said in a video 4 years ago that you would talk about your thoughts on purity and all that related to marriage. Would you consider making an episode about this?
I think if you love the job you have means your heart is in it.. stick it out with the horrible boss, and strive to take over that position. I’m sure you are not the only one being treated horribly.
Sonetimes that is not possible especially when the boss constantly criticizes. Intimidates, says inappropriate things or is a bully. That situation will never change and it is best to walk away and find something that fits you and makes YOU happy.
I couldn’t even imagine having “The Talk” with my father!!! That is just too too weird! I would have been totally freaked out! Definetly mother to dgt. And father to son!
We got married 5/9/96 and had our first son in May of ‘97.
21:02
It's not about sex, it's about life. You may not talk about certain things right away. When you are young like 6, 7, 8. It's hygiene and respect and how to treat the girl or the boy. The boundaries of growing up. I rather have my child come to me for most things for advice and not be afraid to ask the intimate details, instead going to their friends or sometimes the educational system. I had a friend who asked me is my guy friend cute yes anesthetics are important and bonus but also how the other person is in general treats people. There are transitional phases of life.
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Mr. East please link that video: "Afer 5 years of marriage..." 😅. At least you got it ❤. Now you have to accept it 😂. Seriously each spouse should probably hold that attitude 🤔.
I need some advice. My husband and I been married 36 years. We have some health issues. We love each other but I know we're in a stale place. What should we do to get out of it ? I'm 57 and he's 66.
I’m in no way qualified to give advice, but I would say ask him each day “what can I do to make you feel loved today?” Or just do something small each day that you might not normally do, but know he would appreciate. Without expectations of anything in return… I also think just a raw, honest conversation about where you both stand. A “state of our union” conversation, where you’re at now and where you both want to be, and make a game plan of what you can do to get there. The longer I’m married (just 11 years) the more I realize just how important transparent communication is.
@@ameliab9715 Thank-you ! Sounds like a start.
There wasn't one "talk". It was a way of daily living. My parents talked about things regularly with us. Just day to day.
Have the talk in 5th grade and then 7th or 8th grade.
A good way to act after an argument strip down naked and hug naked in bed. Lol.. We are empty nesters, lol.
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what do you guys think of homeschooling? is that what youre doing?
Andrew seems a little bit sad in the Video:( I hope he is felling well!:)
I also think it is very important to give children a voice as well. Specifically when around adults they are not familiar with. One of my big pet peaves is when a parent says "give Uncle Frank a big hug and kiss". We tell children to be careful with strangers but that includes family members as well because you just never know and unfortunately that is so real and frankly scarey. Let that child decide how they want to greet someone which will guide them as they grow up. Their body, their choice, their decision to protect themselves.
Andrew, I appreciate that you are soft spoken, but when you are doing a podcast you act like you are just talking to Shawn and not an audience. You need to stop "whispering". ;)