HOW TO GET UNSTUCK - ADHD paralysis tips and tricks
Вставка
- Опубліковано 21 лип 2024
- *yes, if you are a man, you can also take advice from this video*
Do you ever feel stuck in your head and unable to act? If the answer is "yes, this happens to me all the time", then you might be familiar with ADHD paralysis!
In this video, I explain what ADHD paralysis is, describe the difference and similarities between physical and mental/analysis paralysis, and most importantly, I give you tips and tricks on how to overcome this paralysis!
If you want to skip to the tips straight away, you can find them in the timestamps below:
00:00 Intro
01:19 Physical paralysis
04:04 What causes ADHD paralysis?
05:21 Mental paralysis
10:07 Tips and tricks for physical paralysis
13:15 Tips and tricks for mental paralysis
18:15 Final advice
18:57 Outro
I hope this can help those of you who experience ADHD paralysis a little or a lot!
See you in the next one!
Disclaimer:
The term "physical paralysis" in relation to ADHD is not officially referenced anywhere. I decided to use it to convey the image of being completely unable to move, although you have the physical capacity to do so.
It could be confused with the physical paralysis experienced by people who are unable to move due to injuries or handicaps.Therefore I apologize for the confusion or discomfort that the use of this term might have caused.
I'll do better next time!
I love this and your transparency it was so good and authentic. I’m undiagnosed but I know 100% sure that I’ve been suffering with analysis paralysis ADHD for most of my life and now that I know about I’ve been studying it and my brain to figure out ways to heal. This was helpful and motivating to see you just doing it. A great book on this subject is Get Out Of Your Head by Jennie Allen. Wishing you the best, take care ✨
For me it’s always easy to give myself a ten second countdown. I broke that rule I think only once, even though I have been using it for around one and a half years.
@@supremefreshimations3477 thanks I’m going to try this 🤍
@@supremefreshimations3477thank you
After I was diagnosed, one of the books I found helpful was The Disorganized Mind by Nancy Ratey.
I'm in a similar situation, I'm partially diagnosed - still need further testing - and getting "stuck" is a very real occurance in for me. Sometimes I would just stop what I was doing cuz my brain seemed to stop. Then my would say, sarcastically, "What ... are you stuck?" sounding like, "what's wrong with you?" in my head.
So when I saw the title of your video I zoomed right in. I thought it was just me. So thanks for making this, and your presentation was perfectly fine. You checking your notes was totally fine - didn't bother me at all. I'm heading over to the other video you mentioned right now. - Roger
Physical Paralysis Tips
1. Mel Robins' The 5 Second Rule - count backwards from 5 to 1 then start the task.
2. Exercise - just MOVE your body, doesn't have to be a workout or anything more than literally two jumping jacks.
3. Call a loved one - can help trigger motivation. Even take the chance to talk it out, admit you're in a paralysis state.
Mental Paralysis Tips
1. Make your choices random - even use eeny meeny miny mo. Seriously.
2. Use timers - ADHD people work really well under pressure (even better to have someone set a time for you and they hold you accountable)
3. Label decisions (is it low value or high value?) - Is it choosing a movie to watch or is it choosing a college to apply to?
- ALSO a decision you make is good. There is no "good" or "bad" choice, since every choice is good. ADHD people are perfectionists, which is why it's important to make this your mantra.
4. Get out of your head - put it on PAPER like mind maps or lists
What is a mind map???
Although I watched the video my mind wasn‘t paying 100% attention to the details… so thank you stranger! 😄
Saved me 120min of my life
I know your comment is so old but THANK YOUUUI
thank you!!! also - WOW these mental paralysis tips are so spot on
The ADHD community is full of positive people trying to better ourselves I’m so happy it exists online now. Thank you all so much for the uploads
❤❤❤
Actually I was just getting pissed now that I am unpacking mine that "I can't believe I was _blind_ to this for so long!", but you made an excellent point: there are so many of us who wants to break their condition, helping each other. I'm swimming in great content actually! Also it is very inspiring people half my age mastering ADHD skills.
yeah one way you can better your self is stop taking the medication all the time and pratice with out it
and you only help girls look how big of an anlasisy problem is
I get irritated when I hear some non-ADHD people talking about ADHD! 🤣🤣🤣
I'm undiagnosed, but the mental paralysis is spot on! I went through life thinking that everyone thinks that way all the time, but it seems like... They don't...? Lol
literally 😂
Same lmao
lol same
hahaha same 💯
Right!
😭 I’ve always thought I was just broke, lazy, undisciplined. I’m 40 years old and had this my whole life. I was diagnosed as a child but never treated. I had no idea about this and it 10000% describes me. In fact I’m stuck right now needed to eat. Been scrolling for 2 hours screaming in my head to go eat and stomach hurting and I STILL can’t seem to do the thing 😢
You can still be treated today, there's a lot of options !
I've done it at 30, and it has been *LIFE CHANGING* .
I am literally underweight because of this. It doesn't help that I need to decide what to eat and think about all the steps needed to make the meal...
You have to be careful with the drugs after a certain age because they cause dementia and heart issues, but you can still treat this! Still, if you can talk to a professional, then do! But also, look up ways to deal with dopamine issues, ways to trigger it. For instance, studies have been done with rats where they won't even get up to eat, and literally starve to death, because their dopamine was out of whack. So, if the first thing you do in the morning is get on your phone or computer, that messes up your dopamine. Try to wait until later in the day. But that's not easy, especially if we have ADHD and need our fix or don't know what to do, we often find ourselves in front of a screen. So try planning things out, and try to figure out ways you won't need to be on your phone, ways to avoid screens. Then use it as a reward later in the day. And don't start with the hardest thing, that only works for people who don't have this. So start with something easy.
@@commentbot9510 This is the main reason I buy frozen food and have an air fryer. Eating is easier when I can toss something into a hot oven that will turn itself off after 10 minutes. I'm also trying to use the crockpot more for meal prepping so I can do other stuff. It's also more forgiving when I forget about it for a while cause it's meant to cook low and slow.
@@cymbamcreynolds8838 Yes, I do the same. Though I feel a lot of them are not the most healthy. I'm on the look out for frozen meals that are also healthy lol. A lot of the ones with meat and veggies can taste gross so its hit or miss. Occasionally I will make a recipe I really like and the craving for it is enough to motivate me.
I taught my dog to identify and help me break out of a sense of paralysis 💜
She’ll start by nudging me, then escalates to burrowing under my body (if lying down) or legs (if sitting), then catapulting pillows across the room, thennn confiscating whatever I may be holding lol, and finally…tugging on my clothes. That last one usually makes me get up because I don’t want holes in my clothes, as I wear the same few clothes 24/7 😂
She loves it so much, and I love it too. I live alone, so it feels like someone is aware and cares, AND I want to reward her and let her know she’s such a good dog - by getting up and getting her a treat
I was thinking the other day we could train dogs to be ADHD service dogs, and you've been doing it! I have no idea where to begin with something like what you have done, but kudos to you!
How did you teach her?
This is wonderful, god bless you and your pup.
That is amazing :) I'd love to see the action hahaha. How did you teach her that?
If you demonstrate this on TikTok, you'd probably go viral...
This is bedtime for me. I sit on the couch, browsing the internet, it's stupid late and I NEED to go to bed, and I Just. Keep. Scrolling. And berating myself for not getting up to go to sleep, but somehow that doesn't help. I get to the point where I'm so tired that the act of getting up to go to bed just sounds like so much work... I usually go to bed an hour or two later than the time I intend, because of this. Sleep deprivation does not help the ADHD, alas.
It’s could be adhd paralysis or Revenge bedtime procrastination which is likely to be the majority of our issues. It’s described almost the same only difference is cause being related to school or work and not wanting to not give up your free time at it’s core
Saaaame
What I absolutely hate is that however carefully I've followed my winding down routine - the act of making sure things that need charging are plugged in, of checking the doors are locked and nothing is going to catch fire, putting earplugs in, making sure the cat has all he could need and then climbing the stairs - it makes me extremely wakeful. I should probably do all those things well before I want to sleep.. But then there's said cat (four hours) and the aging bladder (3.5 hours) so, at best, I'm looking at being able to get about two hours of sleep. Oh, and then there's the apnea (or whatever it is) that wakes me up with drowning just as I'm about to get something actually therapeutic ... I think I may have been chronically sleep deprived for years.
Your description of perfectionism and how it is associated with mental paralysis was perfect. I have a extreme fear of failure that ironically leads me to give up and fail anyway. Thank you for the tips!
I feel like th ebrain can be like "if it's going to crash, I am going to control how it crashes or I could be hurt more"
This is one of the most relatable comments I’ve ever read.
It's hard to feel in the moment that final hidden option, no action at all. Really, it's the default until we choose.
Are you successful in life despite this chronic fear ?
@@tatyanasmith2714 depends on how you define success. But I've been pretty happy with my life lately. What happened to me is that I started to pay more attention to my achievements. Instead of fearing that I would fail in a test, for example, I would look back at a test that I did well in and remember that if I've had success before than I can do it again.
Of course, the initial success wasn't easy. I worked really hard to do well in it, had help from a friend to prepare myself better and even after all that it still took some weeks for the thought that I am capable, that I am strong, that I am smart, that I am dedicated, and that I can do well in the things I set my mind to.
I bet you can find success too, in your own way, just stay calm and go step by step towards your goals
My ADHD wouldn't allow me to watch this video in it's entirety I tried but I've made it through about 13 minutes so far and of course I will be back to finish later but for now I must go. thank you so much for taking time to make this video!
Thank you Chelsea for your comment!! I’m really trying hard to cut the footage down and plan shorter videos in the future because I know we all have ADHD here and 15-minute videos just doesn’t hold our attention most of the time 😂 I’m really grateful you watched it anyways 🙌🏻🥰
@@youradhdgirl that sounds challenging... You're doing great! This video was uncommonly insightful. Just an idea going off what you said here - maybe try breaking it into a numbered series?
You already have the breaks between sections and/or each tip. Seems easiest to create the whole, then in post-production break it into segments, so there's nothing to overthink before/during filming.
Current basic structure:
Intro | Issue 1 | Issue 2 | Tips 1 a,b,c | Tips 2 a,b,c | Conclusion
I downloaded the video just in case I get distracted! Still watching! E-yo!
Edit: rearranged porch furniture but I *made it!*
I had that feeling the third minute lol but I paused for a minute and then continued and paused again for a minute and continued hehe
I vacuumed the floor a little cuz i also got distracted L͓̽ðl͓̽ i realized that thats also the reason why i cant do plank for a long time not bc im physically exhausted but i get bored easily (´°̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥ω°̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥｀)
I never knew what this was. I've struggled with this for so long. My husband calls it "assuming the position", I will be sat, half dressed, on the edge of the bed on my phone. ADHD paralysis. Wow.
Hilarious.
Another great tip I've heard. A common mistake made by perfectionists is connecting the outcome of a decision directly to the decision itself. For instance, if you choose to go to France for a vacation and have a bad experience due to being pickpocketed, you might blame the decision itself rather than the actual cause of the problem. This mindset leads to decision paralysis in the future, as you fear making another "wrong" decision.
In reality, your decision to go to France was a good one, and you couldn't have anticipated the unfortunate event. It's also impossible to know if a different location would have been any safer. The problem wasn't the decision itself but rather being pickpocketed. Instead of dwelling on the decision, it's more productive to focus on how to handle or prevent such incidents.
Remember, decisions are not inherently right or wrong. It's how you respond to the outcomes that truly matters. Adopting this mindset can help you overcome decision paralysis.
Thank you for your wisdom. That was really helpful to read! :)
wow this is exactly what happened to me. I accepted to move and live with my husband in another continent only to realise that Ive been stuck with blame and guilt of making a bad decision for leaving my family. I moved because of marriage and didnt know I have ADHD until last year (17 years marriage, beating myself up for moving to another life/world) I am now numb. I have no feelings what so ever. I have been paralysed and numb for 17 years or more.. I just want to live without overthinking, without self criticising/judging, I want to be able to feel my emotions and my needs. I literally dont even feel when Im hungry or tired. For years Ive thought of moving closer to family (because I started to relate EVERYTHING to the move) but never took a step because I was overthinking and mental paralysed. I was too scared to make the wrong decision. This made me stop living my life and enjoying everything around me. I even couldnt settle in a house and buy proper furniture because back in my mind I always thought Im probably going to decided to move.
Fast forward; after 17 years of marriage, I look back and realise I have been put in situations that was too much for my ADHD brain to deal with alone. I wasted many years, wasted beautiful moments of life, and I cant even remember much from past years anymore. I noticed I am slowly not able to recall memories.
I relate to everything here except for working well under pressure. Usually I’m in paralysis because of pressure overwhelming me- to the point where it becomes too late and I’ve lost the opportunity to complete that task (For time sensitive things). Then there’s technically no point in worrying about it anymore, because the consequences are something I can no longer control. It’s like the pressure is more painful than the consequences of just doing nothing. It’s happened before that I can’t make a decision in a restaurant so I literally just don’t order and convince myself I didn’t want to eat. The only reason why I’m commenting, is because it’s been so debilitating and self-sabotaging lately, and I’m curious if anyone else has had similar experiences.
That’s the same for me… most of the time I go past deadlines because I’m so overwhelmed that I can’t even start the task. But usually but I break it down over and over until the tasks are as small as possible, and then I can finally feel the time pressure and get started! I’m sure lots of people share this experience, you’ve definitely come to the right place ☺️
of course we adhd people can relate, you are not alone
This is me with my homework every week. The pressure of doing it builds up so much that waiting too long and screwing it up actually hurts less. I try not to do that, because I obviously can’t succeed at anything with that mindset. I’m still trying to figure out how to get past it, so I honestly don’t have much advice. I just wanted to let you know that you’re definitely not the only one that feels that.
I’ve been feeling that way a lot recently and i really like how you put it. I just need to figure out how to make the consequences matter more to me than the pain of actually going through with the task… sometimes it feels impossible
You just described my entire existence.
I'm undiagnosed, but everytime I watch basically anything about ADHD, I feel like I hear someone describing my life. Thanks for the tips !
Seriously I really thought everyone was like this
@@Uhhlindzybabyomg, same
Recently diagnosed and now that I know it's not just depression holding me hostage, I looked up help on this category and the counting down worked, except I had to do it from 30. 5 was too short and my overthinking was too strong, but when I counted from 30, it gave time for my brain to focus on the numbers instead and BOOM I was out of bed. Thank you!
I'll try that. I read the book and tried 54321, and I've tried it before the book - it has never worked for me.
Thank you so much for sharing. I feel the same way, im going to try this!
The guilt we feel (or at least I do) from not being able to be productive because of the mental and physical paralysis is so real. Thank you for making this video! I’m glad I am not the only one experiencing this
I was diagnosed with ADHD over a year ago but I am not that educated on it. I just found this channel today and I love the community! Sending good vibes to all of you and thank you for helping me and others learn!
couldn't say anything more true. I feel so bad about myself after a paralysis spell
Me too. 😢
I could remember several years ago, I suffered severe depression and mental disorder. Was actually diagnosed with ADHD. Not until my son recommended me to psilocybin mushrooms treatment. Psilocybin treatment saved my life honestly. 8 years totally clean. This is something that really need to be use globally to help people with related health challenges.
Congrats on your recovery. Most persons never realizes psilocybin can be used as a miracle medication to save lives. Years back i wrote an entire essay about psychedelics. they saved you from death bud, lets be honest here.
Can you help me with the reliable source 🙏. I'm 56 and have suffered for years with addiction, anxiety and severe ptsd, I got my panic attacks under control myself years ago and they have come back with a vengeance, I'm constantly trying to take full breaths but can't get the full satisfying breath out, it's absolutely crippling me, i live in Germany. I don't know much about these mushrooms. Really need a reliable source!! Can't wait to get them.
Hey! Yes Dr.medshrooms
Ive done shrooms last month in my house. It taught me how severely traumatized I was from alcohol. I healed from many mental traumas from my past and was able to forgive, let go. Shrooms to me is a remedy not a vice. I even felt more refreshed the morning after. So no hangovers. No depression mood for days. No anxiety.I now have a more calm mind
How do I reach out to him? Is he on insta
All of this is me. I was diagnosed at 39 and given the meds. I wasn't given any other information or suggestions so I was still struggling and spiraling while trying to raise 2 young sons. Fast forward to the last three years, I've made my executive functions, analysis paralysis more manageable by changing my nutrition, starting therapy, setting boundaries, and practicing mindfulness. As I learn more from videos like yours, I see so many years-my whole life really-were spent with doctors telling me I'm stressed, or menopausal, or sad from divorce, or overwhelmed at work. I was an undiagnosed and untreated adhd girl/woman presenting with anxiety and depression that I am just now understanding is what makes me, ME. And that I'm OK as I am😊
Lovely to hear about your story, thank you for sharing :) I'm glad I could help
Being unable to move is impulse control. Impulse is the initial energy that puts you into motion. This is the opposite side of what people usually imagine when you mention impulse control. In the normal case what people think of is being unable to suppress an impulse .
I am 47 and this is my entire life you're talking about.
I thought I was alone in feeling this way! The physical paralysis is the most bad for me, and nobody has ever understood it. I was just seen as lazy. This video has me in tears because you all have made me realize that this is just a part of the condition, and I'm not alone. Thank you everyone. 💛💛
We're in this together hun. 🩷
I truly resonate and am struggling with my ADHD still at 63. Finally getting the help I need. Thank you
Very interesting video, we feell less alone, and I already do some of those tips !
I'll add a few tips that work for me :
- When you're stuck with your to do list and you don't know what to pick (or you know but you don't do anything...), just do anything easy. It will give you momentum and un-stuck you for more difficut tasks later.
- Sometimes, the paralysis can mean that you don't have energy, the day was long, you did a lot for an ADHD brain... *take a break*. A guilty free, true break, to do something you like but not "random" : read a book, watch a video that you want to watch (no scrolling..), ..
- Talk to yourself gently like if it was someone else. "Oh, you're stuck, I see. Why ?" "Hmmm, and how do you feel about it ?", "Oh ok, and would you mind just getting up to drink a glass of water ? Or just do XYZ ?", etc (just adding that this is kind of like, bargaining with myself in a very nice and gentle way, without being mad if my own answer is "No, I don't want to do that..", I just keep asking questions and be nice, trying to come with something, even very little, just to move)
Probably have a lot more, but that's the one I can think about right now !
Thanks Faydraa for the tips ! I'll try them out :D
@@youradhdgirl (Never thought anyone else had the nursery rhyme tips too 😂 ! Especially the part where it helps you actually realise that there's a choice that you're drawn to !)
I do the same, but once in awhile it happens when i finally get the momentum going and i am in it 10 minutes later it totally disappears. Mostly because of overwhelming. That gives me the worst feeling.
I have ADD and this is the first time I've heard about this term. I can really relate to this problem and it often makes me feel terrible, because I'm well aware that I should start doing the things I've planned to do, yet I still get stuck in a youtube binge or something else (not even enjoying it anymore either). It's a strange feeling to get "stuck" like that and not be able to get moving. I feel somewhat of a relief that there is an explanation for it so I can work on this. I'm very thankful you uploaded this!
I’ve figured out, as I’ve gotten older, how to decide on a restaurant meal: pick anything, and remind yourself you can always have that other choice another day. IT DOESN’T REALLY MATTER.
I am currently in this mode. I hate it because I want to breakdown and cry but I am around people. But I can’t focus on the lesson and I need to read the lesson so I can understand but I can’t then I start thinking I’m lazy and the sound of folks chewing gum is making my skin crawl with anger. I just want to make my self do what I need to do
Completely relate.
For some now time ADD is also included in Adhd
@@sarahpena9501Right i've heard about that. I think the right term now is ADHD innatentive type. I'm not hyper on the outside, people often mention how calm i look or act. If only i could show the inside of my mind, it's like a jacked up pinball machine, hard to keep under control. I'm anything but calm internally. 😅
I just found your channel today as I've been in sheer hell today with my adhd/shame/burnout/depression cycle and your videos have given me so much relief just in the hour I have been watching them, thank you!!! I used to eeny meeny miny mo my way through decision making, and had no idea I was basically self managing my ADHD!!!
thank you for you heartwarming comment
This is the perfect explanation of what I've been dealing with my whole life, and I thought everyone thinks like that. Now as an adult I got diagnosed with ADHD and started medication, but I just thought I was "lazy". Some days were so bad, that I thought that maybe it was anemia or something like that -it wasn't-
Did the meds help 🥺🥺 how do they make u feel. Im scared of meds because I don’t want to feel like a zombie which is crazy cause with adhd I already feel like that 😩😩 it’s TORTURE 🥺🥺
@@crystyle_atl Don't worry, normally the doctor gives you a low dose to start, so you shouldn't feel overdosed (like a zombie) Also, you can leave them anytime if they're not working for you. I actually just take my meds for workdays and when I really need them! They've been so helpful, but I like to take my weekend off.
When I'm on meds it's like things just get sooo much easier to do, and It calms the noise in my head. But on the negative side, it sometimes gives me tachycardia so I might go check that with my doctor.
Are the meds helping?
"and I thought everyone thinks like that" What you mean? Think how?
The physically stuck thing is functional freeze - it's the nervous system state. Brakes and gas (sympathetic and dorsal shut down) both on at the same time 🙃 fun times
How to hack??
@@racheldahliamusic Irene Lyon has some good stuff on how to start moving again
Wow, I never realized that the mental paralysis was connected with my ADHD. This happens to me very frequently. It's so helpful to know that it's connected to my ADHD and start to have a way to deal with it. An example for me is being both physically and mentally stuck in a store. I have actually gotten stuck standing in one place for over 40 minutes before, trying to pick between two items in a store.
People with adhd are always looking for the next stimulation. We can't decide which choice will bring us more because we won't know until we try, so we stay stuck in the potential what-ifs. This is why we're given stimulants, or at least we should be. When are stimulation needs are met our brains are calm. That's why we crave chaos and destruction at times. Cuz even if it's bad stimulation, it's still stimulation. My doctors are starting me on wellbutrin for my adhd but I miss the stimulants. My brain was so quiet I would sleep! That's not what happens if you don't need it and just want to abuse it. Yet, I'm a criminal for wanting them...*sigh*
I don't know if I agree that the decisions rarely matter. If I make a choice and I am disappointed, it can very easily lead to a stimulation lapse, and that makes me depressed. So I think for a lot of us the choices do matter. There's so much pressure on even small decisions, let alone life decisions. My poor brain...
The rest I agree with completely, though. I'm getting a trampoline to exercise, so we'll see if it helps. I'm 30 and I need to get this under control so I can have a fucking life 🙃
Girl I resonated so much with “That’s why we crave chaos and destruction at times. Cuz even if it’s bad stimulation, it’s still stimulation.” That’s so true and I just never thought of it like that, thank you!
I'M LITERALLY DOING THAT RIGHT NOW! Literally setting an alarm for 30 minutes from now to start packing for my move TOMORROW. I'm spiraling hard right now. 😰
The mental paralysis I've beat it by using time restrictions, my competitive spirit and my anxiety/OCD to my advantage. And the funny thing is I've trained it by going to the restaurant with friends!
I would beforehand tell myself that I need to be the first to choose his meal to be the best and that even if my choice is bad, it is worth my victory over my friends. At the same time I would use my OCD by tricking myself into thinking nonsense like "if I can't choose within the minute I first touch the menu with both hands, I'll have a heart attack" so this fear would win over my paralysis.
I felt that making my problems fight each others would be better than letting them win over me.
I feel so much at home in the adhd community. i finally feel like my experiences and my issues are validated and someone can understand what im going through and what I've went through my whole life.. it also helps me to understand myself so much more ❤
Just another tip here: A lot of times I get stuck on what video game I want to play, what task to do first, or what color scheme and technique I use for a painting. Instead of doing the nursery rhymes, I actually downloaded an app on my phone that allows me to enter in all of the options then it randomly chooses one for me. Either I’m happy with it and go for it, or I realize that’s not what I wanted and can rule it out.
Another thing I get stuck on is what food I want to eat first on a plate. I like eating things one at a time for some reason, so I started to just pick whatever can’t be reheated well first. If you’re consistently stuck with something, try creating a rule or a system that you automatically go to when in that specific scenario. That helps make the process more efficient and less of a waste of time.
I haven’t been diagnosed with ADHD, but I can really relate to this! it’s a nightly struggle for me to get ready for bed because I just can’t bring myself to move for even hours on end. I get super overwhelmed when I have to make decisions too, especially when I don’t feel like things are absolutely perfect and that I’ve messed up. I always felt like I was just extra stupid and self conscious and lazy, but this made me feel loads better knowing there’s something I can do about it and that it’s not just me. Thanks so much for taking the time to make this video
Yes! Bedtime is the worst for me! It drives my husband nuts when I get to bed late (and wake him up) because I couldn't get myself up off the couch 🤦♀️
I randomly found you video, but I don’t believe in coincidence. I’m a Christian & I believe that I was meant to find it bc it was so meaningful to me. So thank you for sharing it. I just posted my story under someone else’s comment, but I’m going to post it again here, even though it’s very long. Maybe someone else will find it here & be able to relate to something I share??…
Thank you for posting this! It is the first one that I’ve seen of yours & I agree, it’s spot on! After listening to the whole thing I immediately liked & subscribed. This is the first time I’ve heard one of my struggles explained this way & most of what you described sounded just like me. I’m grateful to know that others can understand & relate to what I experience on the daily.
I’m in my mid-40’s, was originally diagnosed in my mid-teens but then no follow up… no meds or anything. Then the diagnosis was filed away & forgotten about. But of course, the symptoms don’t go away just bc the diagnosis is “out of sight, out of mind”. Obviously, the symptoms are still there, but without me & my family acknowledging and accepting the diagnosis,
I was left feeling… Different. Abnormal. Lacking. Weird. That something is WRONG with me. That was the negative side of it. On the positive side, I knew I was creative, imaginative, unique, etc with an unusual ability to be able to either ignore or accept negative things in my life (like my parents divorces & remarriages that added & subtracted step-people to & from my life) & just “go with the flow”.
That seem to work pretty well until I became an adult. Then all of the coping mechanisms that seemed to serve me so well as a kid are the very things that sabotage my abilities to be a capable, responsible, fully functioning “adult”.
Finally, last summer, I “just happened“ to rediscover the original written diagnosis from my youth. I reread it and wondered if it could be the key to why I’m struggling so much to be a “normal” adult. I showed it to my doctor and he retested me, re-diagnosing me with mild-moderate ADHD, and (thankfully!) gave me a prescription for Adderall. Unfortunately, due to MY negative perception of both family and public stigma against mental health medication - it’s potentially unnecessary use & abuse - I delayed taking a medicine that I later found is very useful to me. I finally started taking it last September, five months ago, and I am now aware of a very noticeable, positive difference in my ability to function more “normal” (ha ha). My executive functioning has improved significantly, for which I am very grateful since it has caused so many negative feelings and reactions for so long.
I am a stay at home mom (4 children) and homemaker, with no college education, and have felt a negative person stigma because of that. At the same time I started taking Adderall, I also went back to school (college) and have been successful at it for the first time in nearly 3 decades! The journey has been difficult, but I am very grateful for where I’m at now.
I apologize for the excessively long post, I’m just very relieved to have someone openly explain, in a positive & productive way, something that I struggle with so much but haven’t had a name for or realized it was “a legit thing”. Thank you for helping me to accept myself more… For helping me to legitimize my struggle! I look forward to learning more about my ADHD from the content you (& others) post.
Gratefully, Minda
PS. One of my favorite UA-cam channels about ADHD is “how to ADHD“. If you’re not aware of it, consider checking it out, maybe it will help you like you’re helping others.
I've been searching for what it is that I'm struggling with and the only thing google gave me is "adhd paralysis" so I decided to watch this video out of curiosity! Now after I've watched it I realized that I have these exact problems though I don't have any diagnosis since I've never looked into anything. The physical paralysis tips did make a lot of sense and I remember that I've actually used these without thinking too much about them before and they have worked! Calling a loved one works best because I just can't stay put while talking to someone ^^;. Thank you so much for making this video. I'm sure it will help a bunch of other people too!
I'm not in your demographic (women), but an aspie man... but I can super relate to this, and I had no idea this was an ADHD thing. Thank you for educating me. I've been stuck for months! This helps!
I've spent the last good while being stuck on analyzing my eye floaters and it's been sending me into a feedback loop for days on end.
Get into the 🔅sunshine* ~
It helps Floaters. (science)
* DO NOT look straight at sun- just forward.
according to some researchers, the reason behind the lack of motivation that should push us to execute the task is that as ADHDer we have some sort dopamine deficiency.
I literally (literally yes) broke into tears of relief to hear about this. This changes everything.
Aww 🥺 now you get to understand it, notice it and get better at managing it overtime! 💪🏼☺️
@@youradhdgirl Yes
It's so nice to hear someone explain the exact thing that I struggle with. It can really be lonely because people that don't experience this don't understand it. Well... time to try the 5 second rule because I'm stuck in bed watching this :')
Thanks for sharing the 5 second rule. It used to work well for me as a teacher with unruly classrooms. Kids need transition time - so do ADHD brains.
No worries 👌 super cool brain trick in my opinion! sometimes I’m like “this is too simple, it’s not gonna work” and it always ends up working like magic haha
Interestingly enough I started doing this naturally with my kids. I wanted to separate if from the “count to 3” with threats so I combined a few different concepts I had come across at the time and decided to count down from 5. Almost always it works and (usually, I’m not perfect lol) there are zero threats involved.
You did a great job! 😊 You certainly helped me understand what I’ve been going through. I take meds for my ADD but I’ve been off them for over a week now and I experienced ADD paralysis to the point where I was cleaning my living room which was super messy and I got so overwhelmed that I just felt exhausted and laid down to listen to your video it’s depressing sometimes dealing with this because people judge and make assumptions and that only makes things worse because you end up feeling depressed 😢 My ADD has affected my family and personal relationships tremendously I’m often in isolation due to the embarrassment and lack of energy I’m not lazy or nasty cleanliness is extremely important to me but my ADD doesn’t allow me to be the perfectionist I am and that often just leads to further frustration and anxiety but thankfully there are people like you who are willing to be transparent and vulnerable so that people like me are reminded that I’m just human with ADD And I’m not alone ❤ So thank you 🙏🏽
This was so incredible to hear about. I've had this sort of physical paralysis all my life and have never been able to explain it to anyone else, so hearing you perfectly describe this phenomenon was so validating. When I was young I even had something similar to the 5 second rule (only a more childish version) where I would just say in my head "one for the money, two for the show, three to get ready, 4 here I go" and no matter what, I had to take action on 4. It was so interesting to hear that this sort of tool is used by others too. I also appreciate you explaining why these types of paralysis happen and the steps you can take to combat it. Definitely subscribing!
Thank you so much Alex! I'm happy this video helped :)
Yes, this is the best description I've heard for this same thing. Feels like being stuck, literally, like the Tin Man.
Wonder if this is related to perseveration...
I get this. My son talks about this too.
I was stuck on the internet procrastinating about what I needed to do when this video magically appeared o my UA-cam feed. I started to think about ADHD some weeks ago and I didn't know about analysis paralysis yet. Thanks a lot for sharing this information. I definitely need to schedule a doctor to investigate whether I have ADD and/or ADHD.
Everything single thing you said in this video is me. All the time. Thank you and I wish we didn't all have to push against life everyday , but at least understanding and managing it will lighten our loads. Sending gratitude.
I'm almost 40, diagnosed in my 20s and i have a teenager with ADHD...Im sending this to them immediately! This video is some of the best advice I've ever heard. Great job and thank you! Subscribed! ❤
This helped so much! Im in 8th grade and using this for a reaserch paper. I chose this topic because this is something I feel I have even though im undiagnosed. And this helped me explain all of it so much easier. Thank you :)
Well done, I thought I had it, I was then diagnosed, and it was such a relief, I can now work with it. This is a great video, I enjoyed watching this smart young women. I too have done heaps of research on ADHD, it all helps. I wish you tons of luck. 😉
this has been what I’ve been struggling with since I graduated college last May. other things have been distracting me every day from applying to jobs- my family, health problems arising, my cat getting sick. I was going to apply to grad school but then I got stuck & couldn’t take the test needed for it. it’s all been so much, but I’m stuck in this endless loop of waking up and going to bed with nothing still getting done that goes towards my future. I really appreciate this video, thank you
Thank you so much for making this video! I have physical paralysis like you describe pretty intensely and frequently, and I've never heard anyone describing anything similar, particularly not in connection with ADHD. I have not been diagnosed with ADHD (though I'm currently on a criminally long waiting list to see if I have it), but the paralysis thing has been stumping neurologists and psychologists for years, and it's nice to have a plausible potential explanation -- what I've mostly been told thus far is that it's an "atypical panic attack", despite having 0 other symptoms of panic. I also found myself falling into it as you were describing it, I think just from the sort of overwhelm of thinking about it... and then tried the 5-second rule after finishing the video and *it worked*. Thank you so much!!
Incidentally, I had already found my own coping strategy for mental decision paralysis, just in the last few years, and it's the same as one of yours: randomise it. These days if I find myself paralysed over a decision that I can recognise as inconsequential, I just flip a coin and do what it says. Randomisation (when I can remember to do it and have the foresight to realise I'm going to struggle, and need to do it) has also helped me with task initiation and deciding between tasks: I'll assign different things I need to work on to numbers on a die or dice (maybe multiple times, if they're very important), then roll to let chance tell me what to work on next. Work on that thing for a set amount of time, then roll the dice again.
Yes!! What helps me with overthinking is saying “there is no wrong answer, there is no right answer” because really there are options that might be better than others but there’s usually no perfect truth
This is one of the most helpful thing I've seen lately, I was diagnosed three months ago and a lot of the information that I can find is only in English, so I have to study harder so I can explain to my family and answer their questions. But most of the time that information, even if it really is helpful and enlightening, they don't go on this little things that in our live, as ADHDers really consume a lot of energy and time. Thanks ✨🌞
i love the positivity and i just got a confidence boost from this :) i've been feeling the mental paralysis for so long, but i just didn't know how to deal with it. thanks for the video and all those tips!
Thank you for mentioning the 5-second rule. I have been having trouble for so long trying to get out of bed. I have been recently diagnosed and a LOT of things make so much more sense now. Being able to give things names such as the task paralysis and what executive disfunction is has helped me to know that it isn't me being lazy or feeling crazy it is just my ADHD's little minions having a bad time.
Thanks for tips on mental paralysis - while I've heard all this before separately, its nice to see it all in one video.
Thank you, you really helped put my feelings into words. I've always struggled with physical adhd paralysis but these past few weeks i havent even been able to go to school or really do anything at all. I'ts very frustrating to know I'm perfectly capable of doing things and my mind just not allowing my body to move.
I feel you 🙏 I’m glad you now know you’re not alone and that it’s a daily experience for us ADHDers 🙂
It feels so good to hear that I'm not alone. I've been struggling with "freezing" a lot lately and it has caused me a MASSIVE amount of distress, guilt and negative self talk. I'm trying so hard to do better, but it feels impossible some days... I wish all the best for you! Thank you for helping so many people!! 😊😊😊
That part with you explaining yourself to the audience is just heartbreaking and also so familiar. Got diagnosed 10 hours ago. Thank you for your amazing video!
I have the same struggles and can really relate! Thank you so much for sharing! ❤
Wow! This video is packed with info! Gonna have to re-watch it with a notebook so I can take notes! Thank you for all the time and effort you put into this. You’re gorgeous. And sometimes we just gotta DO THE THING. No matter what we think is wrong with it. DO IT imperfectly!!! ❤
Thanks you so much Carol! Glad I'm helping in some way ☺️
Thank you for this video! I really appreciate your content! Looking forward to watching all the videos 🤗😂
Your articulation of your experience is incredibly helpful. You described many things I experience, but have never spoken to anyone about. When the story is "I feel like a broken person," there's not much hope. But when it's "oh I just have different wiring," I can grow from that place. Thanks.
That's amazing to hear Micah. Thanks a lot for your comment :)
Everything I needed to hear at this moment after 2 days of physical paralysis. Many tears and many many thanks for making this video. 💖🙏🏻
I’m so glad it helped ☺️ sending lots of love and support your way 🙏
Oh my god . I was struggling with inability to make decisions, every small decision makes me so overwhelmed. This video feels so relatable. I need to get checked for ADHD. Thank you for posting this.
Really needed this and finally, advice that makes sense! Thanks, girl!
This is an issue I been dealing with for the past whole month or two and I'll be honest that's how ADHD ends up feeling like, an overwhelming roller coaster until you simply lose faith in yourself to try again. Thank you for your insight and sharing your methods in dealing with this extremely toxic situation to fall into, your experience is definitely relatable for ADHD folks regardless of gender. Your use of vocabulary strongly emphasizes how real the feelings and struggles are for an individual such as being trapped in a "lethargic" & "vegetative" state. Making those feelings feel real helps people who have trouble giving themselves a break from telling themselves toxic things such as paralysis is "just an excuse" or "laziness".
Thanks a lot for this lovely comment ❤️ I'm really grateful to hear that my videos are helping because of their "realness". I'll try to keep it very real in my future videos :)
Mel Robbins 5 second rule has saved me pretty much every day since I learned about it. Wonderful video!😁 I subbed🙌🏽
I really love this video, thank you for making stuff like this, it makes me feel like I'm not so alone
I connected with your video. This video so much. When I was a child I was given a diagnosis of ADD but it’s mostly not been something I’ve identified with. A lot of the main issues talked about. Especially men, I just don’t relate with. Now I see this video and I realize a lot of my issues relate to paralysis. Some I didn’t even recognize as symptoms of ADHD. Cleaning, organizing, shopping , why I ALWAYS get the same foods at restaurants , even relationship decisions. Are issues with mental paralysis.
Recently I began to cry while I was packing to move because having to make so many decisions about what to keep, how to pack, what order to pack them in, when to do, putting it off, seeming to take way longer then I realized. I texted my sister and told her I was overwhelmed. She was there in 20 minutes.
I know you said this was for women with ADHD but you just described my entire life in 20 minutes.
Great video! It feels nice to know I not the only struggling with these things!
I’m experiencing this paralysis so often these times , and I’ll definitely try everything to get off that state , thank you for sharing !
Great video with so much valuable information!!! Thank you for sharing!!!
Just found your channel, thank you so much for sharing your experiences and journey! I will be tuning in again and watching more of your helpful videos!
I really liked it. Real and relatable. Good job, this kind of content I was looking for to help myself.
Best adhd description and very well related to me. Thank you for making this video ❤
Thank You - that helped. Some good suggestions that worked. Also, really grateful for the time stamps, my brain could not have coped in a low motivation, paralysis state to listen to whole video, I needed to get straight to the action. New sub because of that 😊
Thank you so much for this video! OMG! Physical paralysis! I go through it every day, but NEVER thought it had to do with my ADHD. Thank you again, this is such a HUGE help! :)
Like when I know I should be doing something else but instead I'm watching your video because it makes me feel more normal and understood. Thank you for that.
You filmed it 55 times. Lol. I love that you did. Thank you so much for caring and sharing.
These tips were awesome, I took notes and I am using them already! Thank you for sharing.
Thank you so much for this video, keep doing what you're doing. You're helping a lot of people!
Moments... More like hours going down YT rabbit holes! Great vid, thanks for your transparency!
You are a gem. 🥰 So glad I found your channel. Thank you for the info.
I think everything here was well said. You mirrored back a lot of things that I know but need to be reminded of…Something I learned is instead of looking for perfect I look for ‘enough’. Enough can be amazing.
Thank you so much! I just found your video after searching ‘mental paralysis’ because I am so stuck right now! This disorder is keeping me from living the life I want but never know where to start. And YES to the perfectionism, inability to make choices, and deadline oriented. Add aging to that and…ugh!!
You’re so relatable 🥰 This topic is such a huge issue for me but so hard to find content on - Great video ❤I look forward to watching your channel grow
I've been having these difficulties my entire life, but I'm just now learning that it's a thing. 😅 I started your video with a lot of skepticism and wariness, because mostly I find peoples advice (on whatever I'm trying to deal with) to burden me more often than help me. But these things you are suggesting seem completely doable and now I'm feeling hopeful! Thank you!
Thank you for watching despite your apprehension and thank you for your kind comment 🥰
GREAT SPOT ON VIDEO!
No idea if I have ADHD but I struggle with both types of paralysis. One thing I sometimes find helpful is the body doubling videos on UA-cam, like study with me (pomodoro since I know I'm not going to sit for the whole time without getting bored), clean with me etc. Edit: also the menu thing if I know what restaurant we're going to beforehand I'll look up if they have a menu and choose something before we go otherwise I will take a while to decide. I haven't been able to do that with all restaurants though so I try be quick, like I don't want pizza tonight so it cuts off all the pizza options, then narrows it down a bit
New subscriber!! This video is insanely good! I've got all these tips on a post-it note on my desk. I'm excited to use these when I'm "stuck"!
I have CPTSD and was trying to find videos on how to stop feeling ‘stuck’. I found that adhd videos resonated with me and there’s a lot of connections between the 2 conditions (perfectionism, trouble deciding, freeze state, etc).
Ur outro was superb ! U r an angel 👼🏻
I love your content. Your explanations are so clear and relatable.
thank you Paula!!
You nailed it. Thank you for sharing and helping us.
This video is so great. I will admit that I am not diagnosed with adhd, but videos like these where I relate so well to a situation make me think I should look into getting tested.
Both paralysis situations have happened so many times to me. Then you mentioned the 3rd tip of breaking it by calling a friend and I immediately recalled several times where I would be in a doom scroll and remember my friend told me to call them and I would be like "i can't stop scrolling even to call them" but then THEY would call me and sure enough like you state, picking up the phone breaks the trance and I immediately get up and start doing something I should've been for the last hour.
Also, I've heard that you should always flip a coin to make decisions (or do eenie meenie like you say) because if you really don't mind which option, it makes a decision for you, or it helps you identify which option you really want through either relief on which one it lands on or disappointment it wasn't the other option.
Thank you for this video. I have not ever heard anyone talk about this in relation to ADHD. It's such a relief to know that others struggle with this too. Grocery shopping can often take me a long time because of the choices.
And thank you for the tips!!!, your perspective (small decisions vs big) and reminding me of the 5 second rule! Quite helpful!
Thank you Monica! Glad it could help
I want to thank you so much! I have adhd and it's been a daily struggle(I tend to hyperfocus a lot and get overwhelmed awfully with decisions). How you described physical and mental paralysis is very accurate. I've been trying to explain what I now know as physical paralysis to my mom and even to myself(sometimes we can be our hardest critics)and now I feel validated and I have a way to explain it. So thank you!
I just got diagnosed in my 30s n looking back at my life I'm like duhh, but not knowing until I was 30 he has kind of kept me in the states of ADHD issues including the paralysis when she speaks on scrolling in your phone when there's so much to be done whether it be cleaning your room or finding a job (wishing u much luck with the job search you're personable and well spoken I'm sure you'll find something worthwhile) so I love videos like these cuz they really sum up the issue and help w simple tools that get me going and productive! Thanks you for sharing ☺️
So glad you finally got diagnosed ! and thanks for your really sweet comment ☺️ see you around
Thanks so much for your "imperfection." Your tips are really very helpful 😊❤
This was so helpful, thank you! Always wondered why I was stuck after work every single time.
Yay! So glad I found your Chanel!
Great video - I've done some of these things including listening to the audible version of Mel Robbins book. Sometimes when I get stuck I can't remember my solutions due to the frustration, so my solution is to save your solutions in my bookmarks and revisit when needed. Thank you.