Rest in peace, Dr Humphries. This video changed my life. And then you helped me do the rest. I've stopped blaming, making excuses and facts fit a wishful storyline. I see neurodiversity all around me now and empathise rather than project my self-frustration. If I don't celebrate it, why should anyone else? I'm flawed. So what. Who isn't? Most of all, I'm focussed on what I can do, not what I can't. I have some weapons and can pick my battles. I still don't see myself as someone who saw a shrink because it didn't feel like I did. It was knowledgeable help to navigate the complex terrain in which I was stuck - dispensed with a warmth, humanity and humour that are only glimpsed here for a nanosecond at 12:00, but actually the default. Late diagnosis is hard. Stephen described it as like the tide going out and exposing the rocks that were there all along. Not everyone has the luxury of being able to change course, but you always have options. I was lucky to be able to consult a true oracle and benefit from experience that was both deep and vast. And if I don't stop right there, this will be another thing I've failed to finish, which would not be a fitting tribute at all (but it would have made him laugh, put his head in his hands, then we would all move on). I didn't expect you to move on so soon, Stephen. I'm so sad for your family and send condolences from the heart. I post it here mirroring the generosity of spirit of this video - I acted on this, got the diagnosis, got the help and was fortunate to get help this good. Thank you for everything.
This is the most beautiful tribute to a person who has helped you..... I was hoping for the same, but I just realized the Doc has passed on. I am so very sorry. ♥
I only knew him for three months this year but in that time he completely changed my life and gave me a hope for my future I never thought I'd feel. And he did so with kindness, and patience, and clarity. A genuinely great man.
Very well said! I did not meet Dr. Humphries but his description of ADHD symptoms was truly eye opening. He described many of the behaviors in me that I didn't realize were ADHD related. Your descriptive narrative on life post treatment speaks to a future improved because of your actions. Thanks for taking the time to share. I've decided to be screened for ADHD and go to work on my own issues. So you made a significant mark on another's life. That's kinda cool✌️
"If you're an intelligent child, you can coast through primary school" oh those halcyon days when I could do the bare minimum and still make Top 5 of the class 😔
Yeah, I am smart and have ADHD and it is hard to transition from being able to not pay attention and do work and get good grades to having to do projects.
The thing gets tricky when you think you might have adhd but you also have childhood traumas and a family that doesn't accept the idea of their children being unwell, of being "different" in regards of mental health
yessss my uneducated Polynesian parents just could not wrap their heads around any of this. (We live in Utah so lol add that into the mix) My dad worked at a juvenile center and even then when it came to this stuff it was so weird. Like he said himself he worked with autistic kids but when I got diagnosed with autism in high school he would not accept it at allllll. I guess it's due to the fact he prob only saw the severe cases.... Long but wow I just emotional coming across your comment
I’ve been thinking about this for soo long but thinking I’m just lazy, procrastinating, dumb in school, not applying myself. I really feel like crying this answers so many questions.
The stress drive is a real thing, currently in college I literally cannot bring myself to study every day but when there are days left before an important exam Im magically able to sit my ass down for 20 hours a day and with what feels like having my insides in a vice I'm suddenly able to actually remember the material I study.
I completed 4 degrees like this … finished on time because I had financial assistance so I HAD to. It was hell. Mid-term and Finals weeks were always no-sleep or very little sleep (maybe 1 hour a day for a whole week)…. I never knew or even suspected that I have ADHD. Just becoming aware now… I really hope you can figure out a better way than me! ❤ Best thing-At the beginning of the semester, take the syllabus and write every assignment in 1 calendar. Then look over that calendar every day. Try to schedule milestones for the bigger papers and projects. I know it doesn’t have the same urgency but maybe you will be better than me at meeting those milestones. (Like Milestone 1: Draft concept, 2: Collect notes from 10 scholarly sources, 3: Finish outline 4: Finish first 2 pages 5: Finish body 6: Finish conclusion 7: Proofread and send to Grammarly for proofreading 2 days before due) Break the milestones out into weeks before the assignment is due and write in the calendar. I know it’s hard, but maybe you can do it!! 🎉
I honestly feel really let down by all the adults who said "she's so smart, she's just not applying herself" instead of investigating why. THEY'RE the ones who truly failed my potential. I know it wasn't as widely known about in the 80s and 90s, but my sister is only 3 years younger and she was diagnosed then. If I had any question before, he just cleared that all away. I felt like he was describing me specifically.
I was told by my parents "yeah.. you were diagnosed as a kid but we didn't see treatment working and they said it would just brush off".. I'm in my thirties.
@@cerberusleviath4575 And it’s understandable, I grew up around it so it all looks pretty normal on the exterior so how would they know? In my case I figured out how to act around people, how to behave and “warn” them before I even knew I had this. Whenever I meet people I always throw in the line “I have very bad memory so please do not take it personal if I don’t say hi to you or if I forget your name, I can’t control it”, every single time because I know that’s what’s going to happen unless they have something very characteristic. I figured out I had ADHD 4-5 days ago, I’m expecting for an appointment next week to validate what I already know.
My entire school years were pure luck, never did my homework, barely listened. I had average grades so no one was alarmed. But now I'm in college and it's all falling apart. I feel like everyone thinks I'm just lazy. I am lazy.
I hope you’re not too hard on yourself and that things work out for you in the end, stranger! I’m fairly certain I have undiagnosed adhd. I tend to day dream a lot and I find it really hard to focus on what I need to if it’s not close to the deadline. I graduated not too long ago and I developed a lot of ways of doing things (coping mechanisms?). One of them was to get the e-version of books if I could in the hopes of being able to use a screen reader. I have a screen reader browser extension that works for most sites and pdfs so that I can listen while I fiddle with something. My major was pretty writing heavy, so I use the speech to text feature on MS Word to start my drafts and then edit as I like. There’s also a feature on there that reads your document so you can use that instead of rereading everything every time. I also made a habit of writing assignments and due dates down all the time as well using apps like egenda and notification makers to remind me of what I need to do and when. Notification makers are especially handy if you’re working on bigger projects and want to remind yourself to focus on certain parts of that project. This was long and I know you didn’t ask for any tips, but I figured I’d share this anyway! College is mostly about getting your work done and doing it well and on time.
A very good coping mechanism in college, is using that hyper focus, not the day before a paper is do but the whole week. How it worked for me is say I'd have two 10 page papers due on Friday. To the outside world it looked like I did nothing on those two papers till Thursday night, then I brilliantly got them done and got great marks, people were like 'I hate you'. What really happened is different. Starting a week before the papers were due I would think about them in my brain (hyper focus) for select periods of time. Hour here hour there, not all at once, and not at any particular time, then my brain is off to something else and back and ponder the space time continuum or something, who knows in our brains. But, ADHD are great visualizers, we spend half our freaking time visualizing random things. So you look at what happened is that I really spent 2-3 hours a day focusing on those papers in my head, writing, re-writing, etc. the paper. By the time Thursday rolled around, the papers had been done in my head by Wed night. Thursday, I just wrote it all down without stopping, it was easy. So learning to segment your hyper focus to random times during a day, really helps with getting things done.
@@michaelstacie4249 doesn't work. The week after the "hyperfocus" week turns into a complete burn out. It's like my brain is video game, gaining powerups, and when it finally releases the power, everything goes back to normal if not slower
@@jamssy3409 so you figure out what helps you recharge. Video game marathon, couple of days camping in reach of a bar and food. Only you know what and who gives you the necessary distraction/lift/reward.
@@jamssy3409 Yea, what Micelle said is correct, for everyone it's different. So many factors go into the scale of ADHD. Some need meds, some don't, some never knew they had ADHD. I'm one of the ones that never knew. I'm 54 now, very successful, and interact in society fairly well. I've discovered I have a ton of coping mechanisms I've developed over the years, which I never realized till recently why I do these things. I was blessed to be able to pursue my dreams of the software industry. I have no problems with focus or forgetting to do things at work (well no more than anyone else). Best thing is to pursue whatever you are passionate about, a kind of work where it is not work to you. After 30 years in the software industry I'm still disappointed at the end of my work day that I shouldn't be work more. No frets, it will all work itself out.
Protip for the people saying they lost focus during the video: Watch it 2x speed. Feels too fast at first (maybe start with 1.5x) but you get used to it and I swear I can watch hours of educational video now. Even just audio. Makes drifting off less likely for sure.
As someone who's plucking up the courage to go to the GP about this it's quite crushing listening to a professional you've never met detail your life and the struggles you've felt inside for the last 35 years. I just thought I was 'a bit shit at life' compared to everyone else but now I realise I've actually done incredibly well to make it look like I was coping as well as they were. And I'm only 8mins in!
@@JamieRambles my autobiography title is “No Regrets” which when my father was dying at 59 he told me he had no regrets (40+ yrs ago). Every chapter of my book, however, would be a story of my various life regrets. I’ve had happy moments but so many times it more than likely was a shit show. Certainly didn’t know about this Dx when I was younger but I needed help. I could’ve been a contender.
I went to the go 15 years ago asking to be tested for adhd. Assessment was not included under the nhs and would cost £800 back then. I didn’t bother and started medication illegally instead. No wonder only 1 in 4 are diagnosed.
As someone diagnosed with ADD as an adult I can say that it isn't always easy to concentrate on something I enjoy because I start something like a crochet project for instance, my mind starts coming up with other crochet projects I can do and then I end up with 50 unfinished projects. So even stuff I enjoy can be hard to keep up with
This is so painfully true!! I drive my husband crazy (and myself) with the amount of yarn and unfinished projects throughout our entire house (of course, in messy piles, bags, buckets). I have finished so many projects, but I could dress a small army with the amount of unfinished ones I have. I came to this realization very recently (which may be relatable to you or not, so I'm curious). In order for me to focus, especially with things that require me sitting down and listening like conversations or watching a movie, hearing a lecture, or anything that my ears need to hear and my brain needs to process without my mind wandering off, I will crochet. I call it my little therapy. I am able to give my husband undivided attention when he's telling me about his day if I am crocheting. And I realized after looking at all my unfinished projects and feeling ashamed or lazy, I realize that it's the process, not the project that matters. I enjoyed the pattern, the colors, the feel of a particular project, and could enjoy it in THAT moment while being able to functiion and feel more normal, if only for a bit. And isn't that really a lot of what we desire? So now I look at my 80% done scarf that i started over a year ago (that really all it needs to be finished is a border, tying in the ends, and fringe lol), and I can see it as "That scarf helped me through that time of my life while I worked on it. And I made it through. And it helped then in that moment. Whi ch in turn helps me now in this moment.
I was somewhat forced into making a scarf with a loom. I was super pumped with the first one. got it done in a week while at work and in downtime. Started a second a little while later, took 3 weeks. Later made a third, and that was about 3 months because progress stopped midway when the loom fell over and I had to restart. I haven't made anything since.
I enjoy learning about history, but I often have to remind what I'm watching because I start zoning out. Even if it's something I REALLY want to listen to, and focus my attention on, seconds later my concentration starts to drift to inner thoughts, daydreams, or even something going on around me like a dang spider building its web. It's frustrating, but I just look at it as even if I don't hear it the first time, or second, or third lol, if I'm repeating it, my brain is subconsciously picking it up still. Because I am still listening....my focus is just elsewhere.
i am the same way with my crochet AND my other artworks. I have so many blender 3D files of unfinished projects and drawing files of drawings i never finished but always intended to finish. My sketchbooks have always been like that as well. I remember friends and siblings always asking me why i never finish stuff? cause they will see me flip through to a new page or they might look through my books. I never really had a good explanation other than, well i thought about something else i guess. Though it isn't until it gets mentioned when i actually take notice of how much i actually only half my projects.
Same here. Felt so understood and seen. It’s actually so conforting to have someone confirm that you’re struggles exist and are valid and are not your fault
The part where he said it gets harder at secondary school was so on point... that's when I realized school was difficult, not because of the learning, but because I had to manage my homework time, worry about not forgetting my stuff, do well on tests under pressure, pick the school bus at the same hour every day. That was also the time I realized I was "weird".
I made it through uni with pretty good grades, but there were way too many stressful nights where procrastination kicked me in the behind. Now that I'm a teacher, I'm actually feeling the strain worse than ever because the other teachers don't seem to struggle to focus on things the way that I do... I've assumed I was ADD for some years, but in the last week I've become even more convinced of it.
I excelled from grades 1-10 with no study, struggled with 11, failed 12 (first time) & had to repeat. We had describing my academic history & adult life from 4:40 onwards!
This just made me cry so much. At 52 I’ve felt so misunderstood my whole life and no one wants to hear you have ADHD, they just think you’re making excuses for your behaviour.
Yup, I've been told to just get on with it. I've been told " You've got this far, suck it up." (In my 50s) Or "yes everyone does that, it's nothing special"
Uses stress to generate focus - SO TRUE. I had no difficulty in college because I could speed read the highlights of my textbooks, and do my homework in class while ignoring the painfully boring lectures. My difficulty has been with life. If I managed one area well, another one would crash.
So true! I've ended up being one of those who can keep some relationships going but move jobs every couple of years and never progress past entry level.
@@jennivamp5 I hear you! I could never fathom finishing a bachelor’s degree, so I can’t really move up in my career due to the dreaded “must have a bachelor or master degree to apply.”
Oh my god. I have never felt more *seen* in my life. I've gone my entire life wondering why, after sailing through primary and secondary school (admittedly pulling all nighters for pretty much the entirety of secondary school to turn in work on time) with outstanding grades and being at the top of my class, I flunked so hard out of university. Not once. Not twice. But three times. I kept trying and kept dropping out. I was told I was gifted and brilliant early in life, and so in pursuing higher education I fully expected to become an accomplished academic... to instead have been such a complete and utter failure drove me to substance abuse and severe depression. Wow. So much to think about. Every single characteristic Dr. Humphries talked about here applies to me.
@@samsaloser8258 I'm already in the process of getting my life together. At least now we KNOW that there's an issue. Knowing is half of the battle brother. WE CAN DO THIS. I have an immense amount of retake work to do for the 3rd of August but since watching this video and hearing what other folks have to say about how to cope, things seem a little clearer. Try and write things down instead of typing, just write down a plan or carry a notepad around with you. Fullscreen mode on desktops or laptops helps a lot as well.
Me too holy crap he is describing my life. Top of my class in primary school, great in middle school, upper quartile in middle school and CRASHED in Uni. I'm now on my 3rd tertiary qualification and still trying to find out what I'm doing with my life. I have done almost every single assessment in 6 years of study the day it was due, due to adrenaline. Fark.
I'm 80 years old and just wrote this poem regarding ADHD I responded to pressure it was my only starter. ADHD The one-legged man saw no path ahead. Clutching at chances he caught in the air. Only the moment, no tomorrow was there? He was blind to the debris behind in his wake. He was caught in a trap, locked in a cage. The cassette explained a hopping bipedal here in the zoo. Some saw him high; some saw him low; all saw him with two. A spectacular show, those stories he told while rolling downhill. No one had noticed he only had one, the tales he told were as if he had two. The cassette was right, and the cassette was wrong. That one-legged man was very confused, he also saw two. It never occurred that he only had one. The one-legged man, now incredibly old, his energy spent from hopping around. Grew tired of running against others with two. Something was wrong, patterns emerged. He suddenly woke from this dream so very disturbed. All the debris he saw in his wake overwhelmed. His tears streamed for him; his tears streamed for them. He finally realized he was a two-legged man who only had one. That one-legged man is me.
This is moving, thank u for sharing. I told my psychiatrist that it always felt like life was a freeway, and there I was trying to keep up with other cars zooming by while I pushed my car with a flat tire.
I saw the Dr. Brown vid last year and cried and cried, stopped after ten minutes and spent another ten trying to get it set up on the “smart” TV so hubby could watch it with me. Cried off and on for a few days. I felt so seen! All of those years of derision, chastisement, self debasement and character annihilation… I’m not lazy! I’m not undisciplined, I’m not just rude or inattentive - I mean, sure I am but not because of selfishness or bad character. I felt so light. Now I can figure out how to work with it and it helps my spouse to be more patient with my wandering off the subject (a to d, j, z, b indeed). You are good too!
I’ve never felt so seen!!! Hit the nail on the head with literally EVERYTHING. Oh man. The moving jobs every few months, losing interest with most things, never finishing anything, procrastinating, but needing the stress in order to focus, driving yourself into a stressed state, my thoughts being all over the place, ZONING OUT. I can’t NOT zone out. I hate that the most! Issues with emotional regulation 🤦🏼♀️ Can’t believe I’ve gone 30 years not knowing that I’ve had ADHD
same here for me too. I grew up thinking it wasn't even a real thing, and it was just misdiagnosed and overdiagnosed. This is what I was taught growing up. I didn't learn about ADHD until TikTok!!!! Of All Places!!! Seriously, it shouldn't have taken me so long. Now I don't know how anyone missed it.
Never leave comments but this video has just made me burst into tears! It literally felt like the doctor was talking directly to me. When he talked about GCSEs being ok, then A Levels a bit of a struggle, then unwinding at Uni, that was exactly me. And then having numerous jobs and finding it hard to settle or maintain relationships. I've just turned 50. Looking back I wish I'd known this at 20. Hopefully now I can get tested and get a diagnosis and things can be better from here. Thank you, doctor. You may have just saved a life and turned it around.
Just wanted to leave a comment to say this video was the reason I questioned if I had ADHD and got myself assessed. So I’m coming back a few months later, diagnosed (at 31) to say thank you for opening up the door to understanding that allowed me to ask the right questions and find the appropriate help.
I'm 72 and finally feel I can stop feeling guilty about how my life has panned out. Next stage is to get an appointment with Dr Humphries and get some meds which might work better than anti-depressants!
Hi Poppy, did it help?? I am 20 years old, really struggling with this, haven't been to a doctor to get diagnosed. My parents are against it and I am not sure enough to push for it much. Do the meds help?? Would really appreciate a response, I need to figure this out while I can...
OMG he’s so kind and understanding. I got diagnosed three and a half months ago. After a life of being told I need to just try harder; meanwhile I was totally wrecked, depressed and anxious from TRYING, hearing someone be so compassionate and non-judgemental is like getting the biggest hug. I literally feel teary. Thank you ♥️
Hi, how has the diagnosis impacted your life since? Have you started any medication or anything? I suspect I have it myself, just curious if it has changed much for you.
I understand and feel the same way. I'm waiting for a referral to see someone specializing in adult ADHA. If I don't have, I'll feel disappointed. I hopes it is the reason I am the way I am. Either that or I'm just wacked.
My very degree was built off of that stress 😂. Many a times I stayed up typing up my essays to submit them at 8am the finale moment to return to my bed and sleeping the rest it the day.
Lol I did my entire portfolio(a semester’s work based on 2 years of school) in 3 straight days of nearly constant work. I too, slept for 2 days after my portfolio defense.😂
Uni was like that. School was different, i ended up having to spend double as long as everyone else rote learning for my GCSEs and A levels like a movie script to make it go in to my memory
Am I the only one who feels a weird mixture of pride and shame after stuff like this? Like I know you should have started earlier but I'm also proud that I actually can do it so last minute😬😅... Almost like a challenge?
Sadly, as an almost 70 year old, this has confirmed what I've recently been suspecting. How different my life would have been if I'd been assessed and received timely treatment. Hopefully others will benefit from this enabling them to lead full and stable lives.
Mood and sleep are immediately impacted for the better on medication. I also can have more balanced thoughts/emotions and not be as self critical or feel that people are critical of me. Days are more productive. No sleeping in. Able to get to work on time. (Still a major multi layered issue but it's a big help). Food cravings or just diet are better. List goes on.
@@scpatl4now I would say so. Not by a huge amount, but yes, more pronounced. I find that regular meditation helps. That is, when I do it regularly, even for only 10 mins per day. I think that if I actually stuck to it, I'd see more improvement.
I cant belive he put this into words. I never heard of this before but its the only way i can do something. If im under imense pressure or stress i need fo feel adrenaline to do something fml
That's how I get up in the morning and be productive. I thought sense I became a stay at home mom I just lost my enthusiasm for life. Nope. I just lost the anxiety of having to get to a job at a certain time and now that I don't have any set standards I'm floundering. 😕
@@libelulafreddy that’s exactly it! It’s this fear that suddenly makes me do phone calls or stuff like that, when usually thinking about making a phone call would be horror. Put fear of for example a deadline in the mix and suddenly I’m unstoppable
Yes that's why it's really dangerous to rely on that cuz once you're adult enough, and less things scare you, the 'fear' that got you to concentrate is no longer effective... So what to do then?
I relate so much to this as well, I literally do all my assignments at the last minute even when I have tons of time to do them, I have been suspecting that I have ADHD for a while now but I didn't make the connection until now
The part about SSRIs was really interesting. I’ve been on several, and they never helped my motivation, but just made me less sad about the things I couldn’t get done, which honestly made things worse.
I agree. The SSRI meds just put a damper on emotions. A few years ago I was struggling with depression and lack of motivation. I couldn’t keep up with work and lost several clients. My doctor recommended I increase my citalopram SSRI (Celexa) from 20 to 40mg, and I went further downhill fast, often couldn’t even get out of bed. I got switched to Bupropion (Wellbutrin) a few months later, which helped, but it wasn’t until I was diagnosed with ADHD and started medication that I was able to pull out of that deep funk and get productive again.
@@DonnaMcMasterRiver Wellbutrin made me extremely dizzy, even while lying down, so I stopped taking it (doctor agreed). I wonder if it would've helped, if not for that particular side effect.
I just broke down in tears at this. My entire life I've been called 'retard' 'stupid' 'lazy' even though I've tried my best the whole time. I'm 34 and after finding ou tabout adult ADHD I've incorporated some basic coping techniques and I'm getting my life on track. I cannot afford to be assessed and the NHS waiting list is 4+ years but this video gives me the confidence to keep going. I'm not what people say I am!
@@DogsWallop all you people doing it for a TREND makes me sick..you really don’t need meds at 34…stop using social media for mental health advice for starters😂 tik tok influencers and Insta and UA-cam clout chasers are people ABUSING the mental health system
The waiting times vary in different areas. If necessary you have the right to request an assessment out of your area to speed things up. I had my first assessment within a couple of months of my GP's referral.
40 years of just thinking its just the way I am. I am just finding the answers now at 68! Screwed up the rest of my life, diagnosis of depression & anxiety but never tested for ADHD. Now as a retired Brit living in Germany, supported for depression, the support system has suggested getting tested for ADHD, my research brought me to this video, and shock to hear this clear description of my life.
I feel you. I knew kinds of in my 40s but it never became a true disaster until several traumatic events happened. Now it is horrid. However like you I. Was not diagnosed till 68. Put on meds which were a miracle at first now I’m in hell zone again
When this doctor described my whole academic experience, that was a little creepy. I even managed to graduate uni relying on the stress of deadline. I did do assignments that I had to turn in, although often in the morning or already in class. As for the homework I did not have to turn in or if there was a chance they wouldn't ask me - I rarely did it. I never came to the exams prepared completely because I'd start a night or two before the exam and of course I wasn't able to go through all of it. I failed my exam just once. I finished both of my theses (bachelor's and master's) on the day of presenting them. I'm not diagnosed but I'm getting closer to booking my appointment with a doctor...
Yeah, same. I got a first for my BSc, but only because I took six months off to focus on my dissertation. Currently struggling with my MSc dissertation. Which reminds me, I really should email my supervisor back 🤥
Same.. I was an A student in elementary school, but slowly fell off as soon as it had gotten more complex. With a huge amount of work and stress I somehow passed, but going for my Bachelor's degree was just a total mess. I barely made it and the only reason I had a good grade at the end was that my theses was just captivating enough for me to manage it somewhat decent. The sad part is, even though I've gotten a very good grade and my professors liked my work, the whole time it felt like I did the bare minimum of what I was capable of. Also most people tell me how freeing and great their time studying was overall and whenever I think back all I can remember is stress and dread.
@@killaknight12 I am in stress in dread rn ahaha, I was supposed to be watching my lectures and ended up falling asleep twice🥲 now idk how many lectures there are to watch
I’m 72. I pursued a diagnosis about five months ago after watching this video and recognizing the story of my life. Over thirty years of therapy had helped very little and as he noted, the SSRI meds kept me from crying but made it harder for me to get things done. Today I just completed my second month of Adderol XR and the psychiatrist is increasing the dose from 20 to 30mg. We’ve been ramping up slowly to make sure it doesn’t cause problems with my blood pressure but so far I haven’t observed any side effects. What I HAVE observed is that I just finished a project that has been blocking my progress for over two years, and my depression has gone down from a zombie-like 9+ to a 1 or 2. I am so grateful to Dr. Humphries and Harley Therapy for helping me identify the problem that 35 years of therapists and psychologists had been unable to recognize. (And how did UA-cam figure out that I needed to watch this video?)
I'm so glad you're doing better. I don't have typical traits of inattention when speaking to people face to face, but I have many other symptoms like very bad procrastination, not working unless stressed by necessary deadlines, multiple unfinished projects, driven by dopamine, and wandering thoughts. I really have no idea if I'm just finding an excuse as to why my life is in a slump, or if there's really a medical reason behind my behaviour. Thanks for sharing your story!
"The SSRI meds kept me from crying but made it harder for me to get things done." For the life of me, I cannot understand why a doctor would recommend anti-depressants, which slow a person down, to help them become numb to the fact that they are getting slowed down even more. Thus needing even more anti-depressants.
usually youtube recommends you videos based off of the audience of other channels you watch. you probably unknowingly began watching or have been watching videos that are more popular with potential adhd people, or others that like this video have similar watch habits. it’s tricky and amazing that this video got to you :) im so glad you were able to figure that out for yourself, and you’re feeling better.
Literally watched this to procrastinate during an all-nighter. I am currently only 3 pages into my final and it is 8:46am. The essay is two days late, and I have to do a move later today. I am going to get checked out. Thank you to this guy.
I wish you all the best .So be it , if procrastination lead you to stumble across this video! Ultimately it's your choice if you want to empower yourself with an accurate and professional opinion.
@@kateneff1796 100% unsustainable indeed. You can miss a surprising amount of sleep in your early 20s but it will catch up with you later. Much better to prevent that. It’s no coincidence that top athletes prioritise sleep like they do.
Oh my God I’m practically crying with relief. 58 years old and I’ve never been able to figure out why my life is so disorganized. Diagnosed with depression and anxiety and on meds for the past 30 years but still feel like something is “off.” I feel like I’ve found the missing puzzle piece. Thank you thank you 🙏🏻
I'm 56 ..... Yay. I'm glad this is starting to make more sense out of disorganization etc.. There's hope! I'm waiting for appointment referral for diagnosis.
I'm 48, diagnosed just before my most recent birthday. I know what you mean. Still coming to terms with the repercussions and just how much of my life's more negative events can be tracked back to this, especially when you consider my 5th school report card (for art): Alan has a lot of great ideas. It would be nice if he finished some of them.
72 years old and just diagnosed a few months ago. I wept for all those years of struggles but I can also see all the risks I took and the joy I found in trying new things and achieving unexpected results. 🙃
I wasn’t to hyper as a child but I was extremely inattentive and distracted. My parents would sometimes say I’m lazy and be disappointed with me bc I’d never do homework and or I’d just lose it or misplace it. My mother arranged a parent teacher conference in 9th grade to see what they thought about me having adhd. They said I’m not hyper or loud, just need to be more organized and do the homework. It hurt because it felt like no one understood how hard these were for me. I could barely read a paragraph in a book because I’d start day dreaming or tune out and forget what I just read.
Wow, those idiots of your school must've never heard of ADD. Just like ADHD but without the hyper part. That's what my brother has too. Also, especially in girls, the 'hyper' could also show itself more internally. The outside world would have a hard time noticing as it's only the mind that is hyper active. That's what my mom has. I'm only 19 but even I grew up in a time when ADHD was just 'the kid who can't sit still' (and that's only cared for because it's a problem to the surroundings, such as school). The actual experience of people having AD(H)D in our society/system seems to never have been focused on and this has to change.
Being diagnosed with a heap of things like depression and anxiety and still searching what is 'wrong' with me, this video legit made me cry. How is it possible you just described me and my life to a T..
You are not alone, I was like you wondering what was wrong with me, Did a lot of research and it turned out I had ADHD. Now I feel somewhat empowered just by KNOWING THIS CONTIDION has a name "ADHD" 😭😭.
This is me 100 %, always thought my diagnosis of anxiety and low grade depression wasn't quite right. I've waited till I'm 55 to find the answer. It's never too late
I was diagnosed with ADHD at 36 and put on Vyvanse. It was shocking to my current psychiatrist that I hadn't been diagnosed yet, as I was diagnosed and medicated for depression and anxiety disorders when I was 14. At first it was extremely frightening to watch myself change, as I have always been very self aware and comfortable with who I was. I realized quickly that the person I was at that time couldn't exist on the medication and that made me feel very uncomfortable. Saying goodbye to that person was difficult for me. With that said, the change was phenomenal. It was quickly noticed by every single person in my life and the positive changes that came to my life, driven by my own healthy and conscious decisions and motivations for the very first time, were truly extraordinary and unexpected to me. Absolutely phenomenal.
I actually started crying when he said “you might feel like you are somewhat different.” Honestly that is exactly what I was thinking when I finally decided that it was time to see if I have ADHD. I’m 32 years old and have always felt different cognitively. My main struggle in life has just been trying to be normal. Trying to function in a world that doesn’t seem like it was made for me. I rarely cry. But that one statement brought me to uncontrollable tears.
Me too. I’m 46 years old and have battled through life wearing “masks” because I’ve always struggled to fit in. It’s like my whole life was just described in a 13 minute video
When I was your age they told me ADDHA goes away with age so I just continued on as before. Don't do that, get some help. Im 82 now and Im going to try. I wonder what it will be like.
@@clairee3612 I'm 46 too and am trying so hard to find someone who will give me an assessment. I was diagnosed when I was a kid, but it never went into my medical charts. My doctor, at the time, in the 1980s, didn't believe in giving children stimulant medication. So, I went to my psychiatrist a few weeks ago and when I tried to update him on what my (current) doctor said about stimulant medication (my doctor was interested in how adderall affected me when I tried it a few years ago - it helped me and I had absolutely no euphoria from it), he said to me, "Every time you come in here you talk about the same thing". Well, NO DUH! I'm trying to get HELP! I reported back to my doctor what my psychiatrist said to me and he told me to find a new psychiatrist right away. No one should be talked to the way I was by a medical "professional". Anyway, just felt the need to reply to you, being that we're the same age and I am losing hope. :(
This video is what led to my diagnosis a year ago. My psychologist had suggested that she thought I had ADHD but my parents didn't believe her. I always excelled at school despite quite literally never doing any work. I got through GCSEs easily and went on to do 4 A levels. I had always had a history of panic attacks but usually I had them maybe once or twice a month and only when a particularly stressful situation arose. When I went to college I started off very well, top of my classes, the novelty of the situation made it easy for me to focus. Then about a month to two months in, I started slipping. I didn't do my work, I was late all the time and the lack of structure in a college environment meant that I could skip classes or entire days without repercussions (very bad set up for someone with ADHD, if I wanted to stay home and paint or play games instead I just would). This meant I started to fall behind, I'm very sensitive to rejection and criticism (rejection sensitive dysphoria) so if say id only done half of the homework for one of my classes, I simply wouldn't show up, I was too scared, so my attendance dropped and dropped. I was having panic attacks every single day, even just trying to leave my house. I remember I had a meeting with my tutor to discuss the problems I was having and I explained that I wasn't coming in because of my panic attacks but that the panic attacks weren't the problem, they were a symptom of something else, I couldn't keep up, I couldn't do the work. Nobody understood and I didn't either, they thought I meant the work was too hard or there was too much but it wasn't that, the work itself was easy I just couldn't sit and do it. I spent weeks and weeks going to my psychologist with this flow chart I had made: something was hindering my ability to do my studies -> that was making me fall behind -> falling behind was leading to panic attacks because I'm very sensitive to failure -> the panic attacks were stopping me from attending -> not attending was making me fall even further behind.... spiralling in a circle. I was trying to explain that the panic attacks weren't what needed treating right now, they were a reaction to another problem and without that problem being solved, nothing would help the panic attacks. It took a year of trying to explain to people, in the end I gave up and dropped out, I was very low for a while and was diagnosed with depression. When I started feeling better I decided to start studying again online and went back to my psychologist and talked to her about how I was nervous about it because I've never been able to study unless I was in a classroom with a strict/scary teacher and essentially was too scared to mess around or text or do something else so with it being online and therefore completely lacking structure I didn't think id actually ever study. It was like a lightbulb went off in her head and she pulled out her iPad and started asking me questions and then turned it around and it said, "based on your answers to this indicative questionnaire, it is highly likely you have ADHD combined type". and she said I think we finally know what's going with you and told my parents (who immediately said that's impossible because i did so well at school and completely ignored it) I showed this video to my parents about three months after my psychologist suggested ADHD and finally they considered it may be a possibility and they paid for me to have a consultation with a private psychiatrist and there we have it. ADHD combined type, Elvanse 40mg and a lot of work figuring out personal strategies and now I'm back in education, doing a degree in forensic psychology with the open university and hoping to specialise in ADHD in the prison population so thank you very much Dr. Humphries. Without a doubt, this video saved my life.
Dude, you just described my WHOLE LIFE. Right now my grades at uni are TANKING. i went from never getting below 75% (by pure luck, never studied and only did assignments last minute) to barely getting 50%. I realised i didnt even have to do my assignments on time... i could procrastinate them and hand them in late with a penalty...thats how much i cant motivate myself. Im going to be seeing my GP asap.. i was on the fence about mentioning it to my GP but now that ive seen your comment and my struggles arent even uncommon, im going to seek a diagnosis. Thanks for sharing ❤
This was an epic read on a few levels. Top.marks on your self-awareness through your psychological mud scape. Im trying to figure out what the hell is holding me back in life because I've missed out on so much, and I'm nearly 50 x
Fucking hell this is like looking at a mirror - never would've been diagnosed as a child, coasted through NCEA, fell apart at uni. Anxiety/panic attacks and agoraphobia compounding things. In the process of getting a specialist referral for an ADHD diagnosis now at 24.
I feel like you have defined my whole life. I used to joke that I was self-diagnosed ADHD but I never looked into what the symptoms or experiences for people were. I literally have had it since childhood and I never knew why I was the way I was. Always losing focus, losing interest when things that do not stimulate me anymore. House chores, I HATE with a passion, it never gets completely done, I only work my absolute best under pressure or deadlines! Easily distracted, lost in thought, forgetfulness, and I struggled with college after high school. I am smart but I am easily distracted and if it is not interesting to me, I don't want to do it. I have started and stopped many things! It's really enlightening that you shed light on what makes me this way.
Let me geuss do you also have the chair of clothes that are not clean but not quite dirty yet? And then you just leave it until it becomes a mountain of laundry so you are forced to sort through it every 3 months or so? 😅
I work pretty consistently and with lots of focus on my art, but that's something I've wanted all my life! I taught myself that focus, I think. When it comes to chores however I have 0,0 desire to invest myself like I did with drawing/painting. I just can't do it. It is sooo boring. I don't know if hating to do laundry is an ADHD symptom or if it's just chore hate. I used to think that's normal. But my flatmate has no problem keeping her space tidy. I could never!!
This explains a lot. I'm at my best when I'm stressed. Normal people suffer in those conditions, but I operate at full capacity, I'm on fire. So much so that I sometimes have to create those conditions to be able to get things done and I always get them done to a very exceptional standard, but I must look like a complete psychopath to anybody watching me. I also clean ALL of my house at the same time. Moving from room to room doing little bits at a time or I get bored, so it's all pretty much completed at the same time.
Same. So much this, to the point that I specifically chose a high stress job (first responder) because I only ever feel my head clear in extreme situations.
@@ADR-xn6dg how do you do it? I realized I couldn't go into Nursing because I was too afraid of missing small details or making the same mistakes repeatedly, both of which could cost a patient their life. Not to mention the idea of having a patient's life in the hands of a person who regularly forgets where their keys are.. just no 😂 In addition to keeping your head clear, do you think the constant pressure keeps you hyper aware of possible mistakes?
I'm a 43 year old woman who is being currently assessed for adult ADHD. You have just struck every single nerve with me and described what I've been trying to put across for a long time in the perfect way. Thank you. And thank you to the commenters for being so open and showing the world we don't have to hide away our true selves any more.
I'm 38 and a GP friend told me recently that they are almost certain I have ADHD and need to go get diagnosed. I laughed, I'm not hyperactive in the slightest. Yet here I am with someone I've never met describing my life and struggles better than I could if I tried.
39 here and my daughter has it, she was diagnosed 10 years ago…but it presented differently (the hyperactivity) so I never put 2 and 2 together. I was diagnosed 2 days ago and I feel like a fog has been lifted.
I've got my first phone call with a specialist in 15 mins and since I woke up all I've been doing is researching and watching videos like this. Wow I feel he just described my life! I didnt have "my foot on the gas" through Primary and Highschool and I went from being predicted A*s across the board to Bs and Cs. I always thought I was smart enough to not need to revise and that I'd get what I needed to hit A Levels. Boy A levels is where the wheels fell off for me rather than university... I ran out of steam in the first year and my inability to focus on revision and particularly the coursework I didnt enjoy or want to do made me suffer and feel inadequate. I bombed the 2nd year and I retook year 13 only for the motivation to pass and the same thing happened again. Fuck me if only I knew then what I know now.. I wish I'd had a better understanding of ADHD then as it may have saved my higher education and helped me out in so so many social situations.
similar but failed all subjects but one, moved college, did my a2 allong side a btec, went university failed twice then dropped out first year. ( all while being the person in class that people asked for help)
@@lightwork5414 that is exactly what happening with me, I'm just getting around to having a word now in my final year. Shit fell apart the second there isn't a strict schedule and perciatant deadlines throughout.
@@borderlinecontent8661 its a minefield of a battle, happy you're trying to catch it at this point. NHS will have something else to say about that though. tik tok.
Watching this may have just changed my life. I've been this person since forever. Not hyperactive, driven by deadline fear and a master procrastinator. Excelled under pressure, high distinctions then next semester couldn't open the lid of my computer screen. One extreme to the other. On my way for a psychiatric assessment after seeing my GP this morning. Thankyou
@@Chlunkon Hey Emilia. It was a few weeks wait and ended up being a one hour telehealth video consultation. Went through my history right back to highschool and then my work history, what I have experienced/noticed and was going through. That was it in a nutshell and I was happy. My daughter also has adhd so that put me in the frame also. I am now on meds as required but they have helped me stay on task for my uni assignments and I haven't been anywhere near as overwhelmed as I was getting. To be honest it was quite an easy process and just be frank open and honest. Disclaimer, there questions about trauma and abuse to rule out any other diagnosis but that's not definitive I believe. Good luck
@@Chlunkon go for it. Worst case scenario, you get to know yourself a lot better. Best case scenario, you can change you life for ever. And for the better. It is a bit rough, there are some questions who can/will bring you to tears (mine was when he asked me how many jobs in different areas I had had since becoming an adult) and there's of course a lot of questions to rule out other conditions - but don't feel discouraged, the assessment is mostly based on conversation and questions.
Getting diagnosed from Tele health or a computer screen dosent mean you have adhd buddy…you seem like a clout chasing Insta person like the rest here who DONT have ADHD😂
Right?!?! I barely made it through mine, and I keep saying it was dumb luck, but the fact that I was able to finish it, on time, despite everything going on is just…WOW. Why couldn’t I have been diagnosed earlier? I’d be so much further ahead in life than I am now 😑
I’m doing my masters now and am terrified of my thesis next year. Even now I don’t really need to study and will just do the assignments the day they are due and get good marks. But I don’t know how I’m going to get the sustained work done that a thesis requires 😬😬
Hey, @@amaliedigby1231! I just (just barely) finished my thesis, and I am in therapy (most likely have ADHD). I would like to share some of the things that either my therapist or experience has taught me. (1) One of the most important things my therapist told me: knowing you have to something or wanting to do something and feeling like doing it, are very different things. If the feeling of urgency is not there, our brains will simply not do the work. The most important thing is to create a feeling of urgency/necessity. E.g., if I leave any empty space on my schedule barely anything will get done. Placing my work-time (like 2 hours) in between two other tasks that I REALLY have to do (if you can plan something with someone else, even better, because you won't feel as comfortable to move your tasks around), helps me be more productive than if I give myself "a whole aftternoon/day". (2) Interacting with my thesis co-advisor, and having several deadlines to give work updates, also helped productivity (specially right after receiving feedback). If you don't have a co-advisor, I'd recommend asking someone you trust for something like monthly feedbacks (and everytime you HAVE to give something new to them). (3) Starting my work-time with a challenge also helps me break the "just starting" wall. The one I use right now is challenging myself to work for 20 min without other distractions. It's simple, but it has been working for me, others may work better for you, just keep trying and eventually you will find it - e.g., some people really work well with reward-systems. (4) Letting go completely from wanting things to come out perfectly from the get go. E.g., when writing my thesis I would just "put in paper" whatever I was thinking. This also helps me just start working and also to plan things and keep a steadier train of thought. I hope some of these help! 😅
I feel you! My masters was horrible and I mainly got through it because I had the best thesis advisor and lots of luck. I was diagnosed with depression and anxiety disorder and blamed it all on it.
Diagnosed at 53. Bright kid, sailed through primary, did worse at secondary, passed my GCSEs against expectations, took A'levels and failed them, retook them and scraped through with very low grades, went to college, switched courses (twice), dropped out, worked for a while, went back to college, scraped through a modular degree, got the job of my dreams, pissed it away.
100% - I was never diagnosed as a child, my parents never even knew about ADHD. They thought everything was a result of lack of discipline. But having been diagnosed as an adult and looking back now I see clear signs. The only time I had straight As and Bs was when my mom would watch over me and make sure I did what I needed to do. During the times she was too busy my grades would slip. I did EVERYTHING las minute and I did it fast and well. The problem was I didn't need to work hard at anything to get As and be in the honor society. I had a 4.0 GPA in High School. And then I went away to college.... The first year was good, I had left over discipline and the fear of being on my own drove me to attend class and be good. By 2nd year the grades started to slip and the constant lure of NYC night life was too strong. By 3rd year I was late to every class, did the work the night before and actually skipped whole classes paying for credits I didn't earn. I later couldn't hold a job or an interest in any job for longer than 8 months. 8 months was like clock-work, a time to get bored and move on. Later marrying and having a child through my ADHD into overdrive. I became an anxious mess. I developed panic attacks and anxiety and would get overwhelmed by everything. Life was hard. Managing time was impossible. I finally got diagnosed by 3 different psychiatrists in my 30s! Today I take medication to be able to get anything done. Without it I just ruminate all day long. I also have a crippling fear of forgetting to pick up my daughter from school when I'm "into" my work. My hyperfocus on my art makes me afraid of missing important appointments, deadlines and every day tasks. It's not a lack of focus that cripples us, it's the hyper focus on one particular thing to the detriment of ourselves and loved ones. When we forget the world exists because we're so into whatever is occupying us in the moment. I must add that even when we manage to force our concentration on a boring task we will most likely miss so many details. If I have to read a boring passage I don't want to read I may throw in words that don't exist, omit words that do, see numbers backwards, or make up a meaning that's not there. My mind just plays tricks on me.
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@AR H wow, thank you for sharing that. The one thing that keeps flummoxing me on adult ADHD is the whole focus on “inattentive” - but I pay my bills and rarely miss appointments. What you describe is how it works for me, the constant fear that I will miss something and all hell will break loose as a result. If I relax it is a different matter. So I am hypervigilant, which makes me more anxious. Add to that the tendency to rely on adrenaline for focus (either manic hyperfocus which lasts a while, or the little bursts of adrenaline that I think I feed myself to try to focus when I can’t, and which feeds my irritability and frustration...though that could just be frustration from trying to focus)...and my lifelong predisposition toward anxiety, depression and fight or flight has really gone off the rails in old age. I can now longer work a lot of the time. None of this comes across to me when I hear people talking about inattentive. Maybe I (or we?) are in a serious minority, I don’t know. Looking toward a formal assessment, and DSM wise, I think I would end up presenting as hyperactive. I get what is said here about how adults, unlike kids, learn not to interrupt people and talk all the time, because it makes them socially unpopular...but that is the EXACT issue I have, and even being aware of it it’s the hardest thing for me to control. I think that’s impulsivity, and I think my impulsivity is driven by the adrenaline. So: somewhat less forgetful but more impulsive/hyperactive. And yes, when I am focusing I lose track of everything else. Again, thank you so much. Even in ADHD circles my presentation makes me feel like I don’t fit in or match. So hearing from someone with similar issues is so reassuring.
i am still undiagnosed and probably will have test next week. i wanna virtually hug everyone here. The anxiety, the fears, because i have kids too that might be suffering from this. coz if id be diagnosed with this, first thing id say is what if i was diagnosed earlier, i couldve had a better life than now. and i wouldnt let my kids have the same life .
I got through school fine, college fine. The minute I threw running a household, being a parent and being self employed the cracks really appeared. Im a 39 year old woman now and some days I cope very well, other days the only thing I manage to do is the school pick up.
36….struggled terribly with my masters after always excelling in school. I figured it was the stress-school, full time work, 2kids under 3 and a deployed husband. Had my last straw figuring “something was not right with me” and got evaluated. I can’t express how much made sense after diagnosis and the overwhelming feeling when I was validated. I cut myself some slack now and understand that I truly am a little different. 🤷🏻♀️
I feel this in my soul. I have read that it is often when women have children and have to manage more lives than their own that the symptoms really start to rear their ugly head. That was exactly my experience!!!
i've been diagnosed since i was a kid but every once in a while i need to watch a video like this to validate myself bc of how many people tell me that i'm "lazy" and treat me like total crap for not finishing all my cool projects. i need to get medication i think
The symptoms that often persist into adulthood: Being overly talkative, a common expression of hyperactivity in females. Being overly emotional/struggling with emotional regulation - of course we get better than we were as children, but either the US or UK had a study that estimated about 50% of those sentenced to government mandated anger management were suffering from undiagnosed or untreated ADHD... I was 43. It never occured to me before my son was diagnosed a few years prior. I had so many "Aha!" moments during the interviews and questionnaires in that time period. Also, I learned to separate my symptoms and my hard-earned coping mechanisms. "Do you often forget appointments?" Well, no - but that's because I have an iron-clad rule of NEVER leaving the room until I've entered our appointment in my electronic calendar with multiple reminders, or hanging up the phone before I've taken down ALL the details and/or entered them in my electronic calendar... you get the idea. If possible, I'll do all bookings by email because then I have something written to go back and check when I forget stuff. I don't lose my phone - because I ALWAYS wear clothes with pockets. I don't lose my wallet - because it LIVES in my backpack that I bring EVERYWHERE, and if I ever have to take it out I IMMEDIATELY return it to its home - or else I'm guaranteed to lose it. It took me DECADES of being late, not showing up, running around looking for essentials etc. before I came up with some fixes that work for me. 20 years was how long my sister refused to go to the movies with me because I always talked and blurted out funny quips or "spoilers" (i.e. I predicted what would happen next or what the plot twist was) before I learned to keep my mouth (mostly) shut for two hours. And when I started stripping away complicated structures I had to live with to barely manage to keep my head above water, it was pretty obvious. And two professionals, conducting two separate assessments, agreed with me.
When he said “if their a bright kid then they can just coast through primary school” OMG THAT WAS ME. My attention was horrible but my comprehension of everything was great and reading was something I was hyper fixated on as a kid so I did well in school even if I was daydreaming all day in class
i had trouble concentrating in primary school i always wanted to chat to the other kids but once school got hard enough i found it easier to concetrate. Also my school was very strict and we had our homework checked every day so that was very helpful with motivation because every day was "the last minute" you can finish your tasks uni was quite difficult as we would have a month before we had to submit assignments
Then I'd like to know what kind of dissertation you are working on. Cause it usually involves months of work or even years of work and is not something you can cobble together in one night.
I procrastinated for badly that I had 8 assignments including my dissertation due in three weeks at the end of my degree. I didn't sleep for the final week and got a 2:1 including being two marks off a first for my dissertation. That was when I was studying as a single mum with 4 kids and still going to lectures at uni most days
I recently made an appointment to ask for an ADHD assessment and I've been making myself sick thinking I'm wasting everyone's time. This has been really reassuring. Funny that I felt the same way 7 years ago when I asked my college for a dyslexia assessment. My lecturer was sure I wasn't dyslexic, but put me forward for it when I insisted and sure enough I'm dyslexic.
You're NEVER wasting a Dr's time if you feel like you need help. Depending on where you live, you already have $$$ to worry about, if you're paying that (or if your Government is paying it) don't worry about "wasting" someone's time" for the help you need.
There is a tendency for people to have "Co-Morbidity" an overall term meaning that people with one issue tend to have more than one. This can apply to Heart disease, and other Health issues, as well as dyslexia and ADHD. Actually. More often than not! Find out the whole story. It should make the puzzle fit so much better, and you will know how to self-advocate for what you will need. Answers solve riddles!
Sharon I know this is 12 months ago. I’m glad you went with your gut feeling, we know when something is really wrong, and we are struggling. I believe many people have diagnosed then selves. Then you need to follow up with trained medical people in that field, to have the diagnosis confirmed. I hope your doing well today. 😊
I actually cried at how insanely accurate this was for me, especially using stress to drive me to do things. I just wish I knew and was diagnosed in childhood.
I'm literally crying right now, I couldn't finish my dissertation and it's been a year and still haven't finish it yet. I thought I'm just lazy or unmotivated, and constantly blaming myself because I'm unable to finish it as fast as my others friends, after watch this video everything just make senses now.
Same situation here. It's been 2 years and still I cannot finish my graduation project. I'm know I'm not just plain lazy because I've been trying so hard to finish it, but I just can't - - for now. Knowing that I have the time, knowledge & skills to get it done and yet I'm still failing, and I can't fathom why. So I'm thinking there must be a factor that is out of my control.
I deferred mine for 2 years. Diagnosed Bipolar/Borderline/Depressed nothing fit. Thank god this man described my life to me thus far. Can still save most of it.
Reading the comments and seeing the number of people who are having the light bulb moment makes me so sad as it is so under diagnosed and so hard to get diagnosed! It’s also made me happy to see that lightbulb moment go off! I was the same when at 40 something my son was diagnosed and I did my research in it and the same thing happened to me! I had struggled for years ! Finally went private and got diagnosed last year! So worth it! Good luck my fellow ADHDers ! Don’t give up on a diagnoses
It's currently wildly over-diagnosed. There are plenty of other conditions with the same set of symptoms that doesn't point to a "developmental disorder". Beware.
@@TheDavveponken generally the latest research points to underdiagnosis, not overdiagnosis. and while many disorders do result in similar symptoms (C-PTSD, FASD, and some cases of depression to name a few), researching into adhd isn't going to do someone harm. also... adhd is comorbid with most of those! so chances are that if someone has the disorders you're talking about, they ALSO have adhd. also, adhd itself is a massive spectrum, with multiple genetic mutations (and thus technically different unnamed disorders) falling under the umbrella of adhd as we know it. and adhd isn't strictly a developmental disorder. many researchers (and folks with adhd such as myself) don't even consider it to fit that category at all. in fact, generally its most notable symptom is executive dysfunction resulting from chemical imbalances. depending on the person, it might be better classified as a mental illness or a neurotype than a developmental disorder. and finally? if someone discovers that the adhd diagnosis fits there life story (in a way powerful enough to make people cry. sincerely, please try to understand what it means to be disabled your entire life and finally discover there's a name for it. it may be easy for you to discourage people from seeking a diagnosis, but to those of us who have this disorder, it's a cruel rendition of what we've been told all our lives.) anyway, yeah, if someone finds a diagnosis, discovers how perfecty it describes them, and with it finds a community with similar struggles, resources that help them, et cetera... how is that a bad thing? why is the idea of a diagnosis so bad that we must warn people away from it in case they're wrong? i challenge you to read this comment section. sit with these stories. try to understand the level of joy and relief and safety that a diagnosis like this can bring people, and understand that words like yours aren't protecting much of anything.
@@colorcollector147 "The latest research". And what is that? What is that research's stipulations? Who funded it? It's no secret that most research into adhd is done so in a positive light and funded by the medical companies themselves. The concept of adhd is fundamentally flawed as it isn't based on any proof. It's all an unproven hypothesis. For all I know the concept of adhd isn't much different from astrology: It's vague and all-encompassing in the way that it pretty much fits all who've ever have experienced adversity in life. On the note "researching into adhd isn't going to do someone harm" I assume you mean for any individual with the goal of seeking a diagnosis? I can tell you I got the diagnosis adhd, I took the drugs and it very much caused me harm, even after I stopped taking them and even though I only took them for a week. For the last six months I've been suicidal, had issues with vasoconstriction, impaired cognition, erectile dysfunction and what seems like nerve damage from a dopamine flooded brain (neurotoxicity). There's very little research that look into adverse results due to use of methylphenidate (the most popular drug for treating adhd). The ones that did have found that it negatively affects growth, bone density, fertility and have adverse effects on childrens brains, not to mention many mentioning blunted emotions (becoming like a robot - like I did) and sexual dysfunctions. There's a ridiculously long comment section with people that have used stimulants or anti-depressants for treatment that lament their loss of self and sexual capabilities. Sadly I can't find the link, but don't fucking tell them or ME that the diagnosis doesn't do any harrm or that I should feel sympathetic towards those that now feel as if the problem with their entire existence has been answered - it hasn't. I'm here furious and filled with care, care that no one else should experience what I've experienced. And filled with rage that a profession aimed at helping people feel better lack the very ability to listen to how they feel and better greet them with the humanity and compassion that they deserve, rather than making a quick buck and getting rid of a patient (thus shortening the queue). The point is that they're not disabled and that misdiagnosing their troubles as "adhd" doesn't get them the help they deserve -and THAT does them harm. The people around them are likely the problem, or the situation they find themselves in. Modern psychiatry is ridiculously ignorant to the social and emotional aspects of being human. I came in seeking help for what I believed (and still believe) to be borderline due to childhood trauma. And while I also literally described post traumatic stress reactions related to said trauma - I could not possible be traumatized, because trauma isn't subjective. I mean WTF? Instead I am meet with little interest in my actual causal history as to where I am today, but rather I am slapped with a label (adhd and asd) and said to take a drug that eradicates my capabilities of processing emotions (as I can't feel them anymore). And then they don't give a shit about the side effects I am experiencing ("never heard of that, that can't be real"). So fuck your challenge. I WAS one of these stories and they fucked me. They chemically castrated me sexually and spiritually. So sincerely and unapologetically fuck off. Your words are putting more in harms way.
I'm heavily suspecting I have ADHD and this convinced me to book a doctor's appointment. I was diagnosed with generalized anxiety disorder and secondary depression 5 years ago and prescribed sertraline, and although it helped so much with the anxiety my productivity was the absolute worst it had ever been. I wrote my Honours proposal in a weekend and probably got a total of 4 hours sleep. I handed in essays last minute, one a month late. My final project was rushed and my grade average. Hope we get the answers we need bud.
@@andreasiwak2651 I've been on serialise over a decade now. Had cptsd come up big time because I successfully lodged a complaint about the causes. Sertraline helped with that to begin with but I'm stuck on it now. Trying to get anything done, especially anything involving the outside world, is impossible. Thanks for your insight. Its prompting me to push for the help/treatment I really need.
Same, they always put weight on me and i refused to go on them anymore. I always do better on a stimulant but doctor would refuse to give me anything like that and just order more blood tests
This gentleman is so... Therapeutic. The way he speaks, his body language, his flooding calmness. I'd love him to be my therapist and I'd trust anything he says. ahahaha Everything he said aligns with what I feel and I, more than ever, think I should get an assessment for ADHD. This was really helpful, I hope he has a lot of success in his life.
Polite correction. He is *not* a therapist. He will not listen to you talk about your problems. He is a psychiatrist. He prescribes medications, can point you to resources to help you manage your symptoms and give you suggestions and tools to do that. A therapist is more often a psychologist. It's easy to confuse and conflate the two. : ) Isn't it wonderful to hear a physician actually really understand you from childhood into adulthood, and how you think, feel, and behave? It's a great feeling!
I’m left speechless after watching this video. Quite frankly, I had to rewind because I kept daydreaming in the middle of it, but to hear such an accurate diagnosis or list of symptoms that validates me- is incredible.
I went to my GP 10 years ago and told her I have ADHD after watching an eye opening video similar to this one. She basically told me I was mistaken as it was a child’s disorder as advised to go home. I’m 50 now and still undiagnosed. This video sums up my entire life. I’m just grateful to know again what is wrong with me. Thank you.
That's because you need to see a psychiatrist, preferably one that specialises in ADHD because a lot of GP's aren't fully aware of what ADHD is and they cant even prescribe any of the medications for it.
I don't understand why it isn't taken more seriously. I had a psychiatrist tell me that the reason I don't have ADHD is because coffee makes me feel jittery sometimes, whereas it is supposed to make people with ADHD feel more calm. Doesn't exactly sound like a proper test to me but alright I guess I'll just keep spending each day crawling from task to task
He just summarized my 56 years of life. The fact I felt so proud of cramming my high school exam and acting it...studied a semesters worth the night before...remember being sweaty i was so scared....oh Lord, this is a Eureka moment and sad.
I'm on the verge of tears. The older I'm getting the harder it is to complete tasks and I feel that I'm disappearing in the legacy of my younger self. I get compared regularly. It's like losing yourself, a self that you created to appear strong and capable to the world. And now that I can no longer carry the weight I just feel so lost.
I was diagnosed with ADHD at 36 and put on Vyvanse. It was shocking to my current psychiatrist that I hadn't been diagnosed yet, as I was diagnosed and medicated for depression and anxiety disorders when I was 14. At first it was extremely frightening to watch myself change, as I have always been very self aware and comfortable with who I was. I realized quickly that the person I was at that time couldn't exist on the medication and that made me feel very uncomfortable. Saying goodbye to that person was difficult for me. With that said, the change was phenomenal. It was quickly noticed by every single person in my life and the positive changes that came to my life, driven by my own healthy and conscious decisions and motivations for the very first time, were truly extraordinary and unexpected to me. Absolutely phenomenal.
@@TheCrippledGamer Hi! I was also diagnosed with anxiety and depression. This video described my school years up to now, age 54. Time blindness and procrastination are huge problems. Sleepy all the time, mind wanders. Anyway, I don't know how to get diagnosed because my longtime therapist and psychiatrist don't believe I have ADHD to the point they won't even discuss it. My psychiatrist says the med could worsen my anxiety or lead to bipolar mania. Doesn't even want to try a low dose. (My brother is bipolar with ADHD.) If you don't mind, what changes occurred after the med that frightened you?
If you don't mind, what changes frightened you after starting the med? My psychiatrist worries ADHD meds will worsen my anxiety or make me manic, so she won't even consider treating or diagnosing.
This guys has just told my life story. I'm on my 4th unfinished degree right now at 35. I also have the longest CV ever due to all the different jobs I've had. I'm a jack of all trades and master of non because I just cannot stick to anything long enough. I have an appointment to get tested for ADHD and this video really helped me realize I'm the assessment is the right choice for me
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30 years old here. Dropped out of college doing political science at 22, now doing chemical sciences. Highly doubt will finish this either. At least now I know why 🙄
Wow ...going to watch and listen again ...as I spent 13 mins nodding and saying ....yes ...to everything...I'm 53 years old and have put off my assessment for far too long ...it's time to get some help and follow through with something that has been affecting all parts of my life for far too long ...because i owe myself a better life
I actually started to cry when you talked about primary and secondary school. I'm not yet diagnosed with ADHD, but my secondary school experience was exactly like how you described and its gotten more and more difficult at university.
This whole video perfectly described what i struggled with throughout childhood and into adulthood.. i was always told as a kid that i was bright and very gifted but that didn’t translate into my academic performance. I underprepare, cannot focus in class, and would miss many homeworks, yet magically i still get standard and slightly above average scores because my exam scores makes it up. University was the toughest for me, especially when i had to write my thesis. It was one of my lowest point. It took me 3x more time to finish my thesis than my peers, and i was one of the student who graduated last on my batch. It makes me wonder if i would’ve turned out to be something better or greater if i had gotten help sooner.
I actually have a similar thing happened. when i was on my junior high school I rarely do my homework, zoning out, even worse i cannot remember a single math formulas on my first grade, i think i am just stupid but later on there's an IQ test and surprisingly my result got above average?? another example is, I never been in the top 10 but surprisingly again im on the 5th rank out of nowhere, and on the 3rd grade i suddenly find math fun?? and magically got a straight A for a whole year. it's weird and fascinating as how different we could be without realizing it. but same like you, in the university i reach my lowest point as well, i got anxious real bad i remember i got hyperventilating for a few days, have a multiple nocturnal panic attack, I even I thought i'll never finish my degree cus how bad i am doing my thesis, but I eventually gradute but got pretty late than my friends. Never thought i have an adhd and how easy life can be if I'm diagnosed and treated early.
The "gifted kid part who struggled with university later on", you perfectly described what I'm goin through now, I'm 25 and recently got diagnosed with ADHD, but the shame of not bein competent enough and not understanding what happened, bein perfectionist, the constant anxiety, pressure and depression of being at uni, add to it the the constant fear of people knowing that you're not as competent as you seem on the outside, I really hope life is at least a bit better after you got diagnosed!
@@madleinebelesi5601 I hope you've found peace within your diagnosis. Not that you are broken or "less than" because you're not. Everything is built for the "regular" people so we have to adjust. Even if that makes them the "normal" that doesn't make us "less than" just different than. Yes, we have to adjust to them and their system...and it's harder than it should be. But there are things that you are VERY good at because of how this works in you and just how you are. Find those good things and focus on those.
Legitimately as he said he was going to keep it a short video because its a video for people with adhd. I had just gone and clicked on new tab to check my emails... think that answers my question.
"you may feel that you have always been a little different, you might be described as a 'daydreamer' or you might rely on stress to get things done." This summed up a major part of my life. Unfortunately, family and friends still regard me as some sort of a lesser being not wanting to make or put in better efforts into my life, when I have taken time and effort into gaining understanding and knowledge, and to create better ways for me to live daily.
As someone who was diagnosed with ADHD at 36, I look back at my life and want to weep at the description of a high-functioning ADHD adult. The term Dr. Humphries describes as "pancaking" in university completely illustrates my time in architecture school. Probably THE WORST major and career to choose with undiagnosed ADHD. While I maintained a high demand and overachieving schedule in academics and athletics in high school, by my sophomore year in college, it was like I was a completely different person. None of my familiar study habits worked, none of my "just work harder, longer" strategies supported me. Obviously, it crept into my career too. I'm glad now that I at least have help and don't feel alone knowing I wasn't crazy all that time and that there are others just like me.
Same. I was always known as the overachiever all through grade school and by sophomore year in college I was depressed from all the stress of doing things last minute and losing the good student identity. I stayed in college for 6 years. By year 5 I was deeply considering dropping out.
Hello, I'm planning to get diagnosed anytime soon too, and I got determined to push it because you've taken architecture as well in your college days! I'm in my 4th year now and the focus mode in pressured situation really speaks up!
@@ppnovoir That's great! You don't have to push off your diagnosis because of school. You still may be able to get some assistance that won't interrupt your schedule. But whatever you choose, don't hesitate to ask questions or for help even if you don't know what help you need. Hope you have a wonderful year and God bless you in everything you do!
Haha. I had to laugh when you said "architecture school". I also studied architecture. Our department was known for constantly ridiculous deadlines and all-nighters, so I think it came natural to me. But, I struggled in some of the classes that required doing long research papers over months. If I couldn't knock it out in one night, or a weekend, then it wasn't happening. I also did phenomenally well in primary school and high school. Was literally the top student in my school, and among the top in the country at both levels. At 42 now, I'm sure my life looks like a failure to anyone who knew me then. I was the "bright" kid, but everything since has been a challenge.
Oh my gosh you just desdibed me. Did great academically up until the end of high school. Pancaked in college and was on academic probation twice but somehow managed to get my degree. Did my masters and it took me 3.5 years instead of 6 months to finish my dissertation/capstone. I got testing 10 years ago on the computer but it said low chance of ADHD, and my psychiatrist suspected it was because of anxiety so that's what we've been treating since then. But I am finally getting reevaluated next week. At 35, I am so tired of living this way...no matter how much planning I do, I am either not meeting deadlines or putting things off until the last minute. Time blindness sucks. I always thought I just worked better under "pressure" aka waiting until near a deadline to do things...I can't make choices quickly. I can't focus in meetings without drifting away. I have 3 thoughts going on in my head all the time. But I can hyperfocus when I need to. I tried to do a project management certification and I could not do it. I don't know why I can't respond to emails at work right after I read it. I always have to wait, re read it...and then think about sending it...then forget about it. Ugh, I just wan to be able to think clearly and sit still and focus on a task at hand. 😢
i feel so called out but also makes me feel relieved that after 3 different universities and studying for over 9 years and still not having my Bachelors' degree, it makes sense now. also did well in primary school without needing to study and put much effort it.. high school started to be a bit more difficult and I was suddenly average student, university I am surprised I am still trying
This made me feel so much better, I thought I was insane. Glad I discovered this at 19 instead of waiting until I was 30. Also I can finally verbalise how I feel to my family now. Thankyou 😊
Yep. Im 34 and knew I had ADHD, but was told I didnt, I just need to apply myself and take things more seriously. Such a relief. I hope you find the help you need though!
I turned 30 last year and I’m finally being assessed, always knew something about me was “off” but didn’t have a explanation for until 2 years ago. I thought ADHD was for kids. It’s definitely awesome you discovered this early, it affects so much of your life untreated.
I'm 30 and got bored and started making toast around 9th minute 🙄 This hits so close to home as I've changed 3 careers already, none which have anything to do with uni I quit...
He just described my whole academic career… I honestly think that covid has saved my final year and masters because of open book online exams. This video is eye opening
It has saved me pharmacy degree for sure. I could feel my excitement of doing the degree dying by the day just before the pandemic, and if I hadn't been switched to online exams that year, I KNOW I would have totally pancaked that year. I'm now struggling wildly through my dissertation, just as mentioned, on my 3rd deferral. This has been such an eye opener for me.
I never went to uni because I knew I would not be able to hack it. Went to college twice and barely got a pass. I am not stupid I have been told my whole life I am intelligent just never believed it..
I'm 66.. you just told my story Thank you... though it's heart breaking... my GP can't be bothered to help me out... we need help here in Canada Glad to find you here....
The biggest thing for me is that I have a really hard time organizing my thoughts. Also, getting started on a project with a reasonable plan and following though is almost impossible.
Planning, Organisational Skills Time Management Goal Setting can’t do it all issues always have been. Slow Cognitive Thought Process until very late morning after lots of caffeine lack of motivation low boredom threshold distaste of micromanagement, emotional disregulation and RSD are huge
@@Dancestar1981 me too. This RSD 🤔 is ready Tripping me out.. I definitely feel that’s what I’m going through often, or all the time. Never could imagine being able to explain.
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It's freaky how when he said that people with ADHD lose focus so I'll keep this video short, I lost focus... It felt like 10 seconds but I saw the video had run for over 2 minutes!
I loved class, hated homework. Terrible at tests. I second guess when I really knew the answer. I get bored easily. Friendships are too much work. I prefer doing things by myself or with my partner only.
*spinning my pencil and fidgeting in my chair to maintain the baseline of stimulation required to sit through a ten minute video* So many of us experience much of what he describes. I felt chills when he talked about procrastinating and relying on the adrenaline from stress to get things done in a burst. What I want to emphasize is how disorders like ADHD can be masked so effectively over the years. Coping mechanisms and learned strategies to override behaviors and thought patterns really make a difference. They also muddy the waters when you're trying to figure out if and what your 'issue' is, if you suspect you're different in some way. I have never had treatment for ADHD and feel that led to me developing many coping mechanisms to hide certain 'repeat offender' traits. Things like procrastination and taking on projects and abandoning them are less of an issue for me today, not because I am any better underneath, but because I am so keenly aware of the threat of these problems. I'll catch myself getting interested in something and *stop* myself from going down the rabbit hole because I already know the dopamine will wear off and that I'll abandon the idea. But there are big holes, because I haven't addressed the underlying issue. So the disorganization persists as a pattern, even if outwardly I am keeping up the 'high achiever' status ever since coasting through grade school. I am sure many of us experience this and feel imposter syndrome as a result. We'll have advanced degrees or run our own businesses (side note: many of us are entrepreneurs because we balk against traditional work environments), yet feel fundamentally unconfident in our abilities because "if you just saw my office" or "if you knew how chaotic my schedule looked" you'd realize I was barely holding things together.
Im 100% in need of treatment. Im 32 now and my life has been manic 26 different adresses 15+ different jobs 60+ girles Drug addiction but 5+ years clean 💪🏼 Its time for a change
„everything is incomplete“... You have me in tears. I feel like you’re talking about my life! Is there a solution to this mess? No dysthymia, no selfmedication, no numbing all day, no anxiety, no fear of getting „caught“ every day? Maybe this might be the answer to the question, why I‘m rather intelligent but don‘t seem to be able to manage the simplest tasks.
Getting a diagnosis by a professional and a Adhd Medication prescription (for example Ritalin) in the right Dosis, physical exercise and cognitive behavioral therapy can help very well.
I'm on medication for a week now- it's strange to go do the dishes, watch some TV, turn it off to do more chores - all with out the constant self nagging and internal guilt tripping and delaying until the very last moment. My kitchen has been clear of dishes for a week 😮
You just explained my 22 year old son to the T! It did not affect his school preformance till highschool,,he did no assignments, never studied,,gets 100 percent on tests and exams,,and took a zero on every project. Lost all his friends,,is one credit short of getting his grade 12 ,,tried online courses and they ran out,,he could not finish. We live in Ontario Canada and we waited for over a year to get an appointment to have him assesed,,and two weeks before his appountment the doctor took leave, we are now at a loss how to help him,,I dont know how I can break it to him,,😢 he is already borderline depressed and feels useless. We need medical care and no one cares to help him.
This is the most accurate description of adult ADHD symptoms I have ever heard. I say this after treatment from several psychiatrists over the last 25 years since I was diagnosed. Dr. Humpries clearly knows his stuff.
Thank you , know its late in my life to be dealing with this. Iv been through the worst years as im now 82 with 6 marrages behind me, 3 yrs in prison and hundreds of jobs, but believe it or not I've done pretty well as I'm comfortable. The only problem I now have is there are things I need to do for people I love before I die, and they are the things I can't do, like taxes and wills and trying to get rid of stuff to have, and put my affairs in order. Those are the things I have never been able to do. I just hope I can get someone to help at my age. So thank you for helping to understand I need help as you made it quite clear that my problems are legit and im not just lazy minded.
I am 76 this year and discovered that a medication I took for arthritis over the past 8 years lifted up my enthusiasm and become more interested in doing things. It also increased my ability to persist in doing mundane day-to-day jobs that I would normally put off until the last minute. Over this period of time what I put down to pain relief was actually an increase in my system of Dopamine. I discovered this bit of info when I realised in the past year that I had ADHD since being a child and while researching found out that increased levels of Dopamine helped people with ADHD. That's when I discovered that instead of getting supposedly drowsy from using Tramadol I was actually the complete opposite because Tramadol can raise Dopamine levels in some people to noticeable levels.
I would simply get some help to do those things asap. If there is one thing I have realised, getting my personal affairs in order or just doing relativity easy or simple things... I cannot ever force myself to get that stuff done. What makes it even more annoying is that I'm well above the average in terms of IQ/intellect. I can _see_ that the things need to be done and I understand _how_ to do them. But the procrastination... it's epic!
Psychedelics definitely have potential to deal with mental health symptoms like anxiety and depression, I would like to try them again but it's just so hard to source out here
I’ve been researching on psychedelics and it’s benefits to individuals dealing with Anxiety, Depression, ADHD and from my findings, they really work and I’ve been eager to get some for a while but its been difficult to get my hands on them.
The Trips I've been having really helped me a lot. I’m now able to meditate and I finally feel in control of my emotions and my future and things that used to be mundane to me now seem incredible and full of nuance on top of that I'm way less driven by my ego and I have alot more empathy as well
@@CarmenOrtiz440 I feel the same way too. I put too much on my plate and it definitely affects my stress and anxiety levels. I am also glad to be a part of this community.
![Lp. Сердце Вселенной #60 РОЖДЕНИЕ ЛОЛОЛОШКИ [Финал] • Майнкрафт](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/YoR0pAV9FVQ/mqdefault.jpg)
Rest in peace, Dr Humphries. This video changed my life. And then you helped me do the rest.
I've stopped blaming, making excuses and facts fit a wishful storyline.
I see neurodiversity all around me now and empathise rather than project my self-frustration. If I don't celebrate it, why should anyone else? I'm flawed. So what. Who isn't?
Most of all, I'm focussed on what I can do, not what I can't. I have some weapons and can pick my battles.
I still don't see myself as someone who saw a shrink because it didn't feel like I did.
It was knowledgeable help to navigate the complex terrain in which I was stuck - dispensed with a warmth, humanity and humour that are only glimpsed here for a nanosecond at 12:00, but actually the default.
Late diagnosis is hard. Stephen described it as like the tide going out and exposing the rocks that were there all along. Not everyone has the luxury of being able to change course, but you always have options.
I was lucky to be able to consult a true oracle and benefit from experience that was both deep and vast. And if I don't stop right there, this will be another thing I've failed to finish, which would not be a fitting tribute at all (but it would have made him laugh, put his head in his hands, then we would all move on).
I didn't expect you to move on so soon, Stephen. I'm so sad for your family and send condolences from the heart.
I post it here mirroring the generosity of spirit of this video - I acted on this, got the diagnosis, got the help and was fortunate to get help this good. Thank you for everything.
This is the most beautiful tribute to a person who has helped you..... I was hoping for the same, but I just realized the Doc has passed on. I am so very sorry. ♥
I only knew him for three months this year but in that time he completely changed my life and gave me a hope for my future I never thought I'd feel. And he did so with kindness, and patience, and clarity. A genuinely great man.
@@pkpckls ♥♥♥
I’m so sad to hear this because listening to this video made me cry, finally I felt like someone out there understood me.
Very well said! I did not meet Dr. Humphries but his description of ADHD symptoms was truly eye opening. He described many of the behaviors in me that I didn't realize were ADHD related.
Your descriptive narrative on life post treatment speaks to a future improved because of your actions.
Thanks for taking the time to share. I've decided to be screened for ADHD and go to work on my own issues. So you made a significant mark on another's life. That's kinda cool✌️
ADHD is reading the comments while you hear the video but you’re actually not hearing anything and now you have to go back YET again lol
wait that's not normal? 😅
Me!
That's me just now
this literally just happened plsss
did not need to be called out like that
Didn't expect this guy to summarize my entire life in 13 minutes
Same here
XD !!!
You took the words right out of my mouth! (Oh look! A squirrel!)
lmao....omg exactly!!!
damn me too.
ADHD is needing to rewind the video multiple times because I keep spacing out. Oh the irony :P
I am like 70% through on 1.25 speed. Its been 30 Minutes of having to rewind lmaoo
Opposite of ironic, but get the point :)
hahaha i was doing the same and didnt even make the link
Sacramento and I'm actually Interested!!
I ment Saaaame .. and my automated texting thing made it into Sacramento... argh.. but also Funny
For 13 minutes I felt understood, overwhelmed, vindicated and helpless all at the same time
Ugh same here...
God me too
Nailed it
"If you're an intelligent child, you can coast through primary school" oh those halcyon days when I could do the bare minimum and still make Top 5 of the class 😔
I thought thats just how my whole life would go... not turn to a complete mess with have finished projects cluttering my whole house and life🙃
Yep much to the disgust of the other kids who could never understand why
Yeah, I am smart and have ADHD and it is hard to transition from being able to not pay attention and do work and get good grades to having to do projects.
I felt he was talking about me. Lol
Yes i can totaly relate and then when i reached high school the only subject i was good at was math
The thing gets tricky when you think you might have adhd but you also have childhood traumas and a family that doesn't accept the idea of their children being unwell, of being "different" in regards of mental health
Hi, this is me😂🙃
CPTSD and/or ASD, as well.. It's been rough, hah.
I feel called out
I’m planning to wait it out until I can move out! :D meanwhile I’ll just stay quiet and endure the scoldings :’D
yessss my uneducated Polynesian parents just could not wrap their heads around any of this. (We live in Utah so lol add that into the mix) My dad worked at a juvenile center and even then when it came to this stuff it was so weird. Like he said himself he worked with autistic kids but when I got diagnosed with autism in high school he would not accept it at allllll. I guess it's due to the fact he prob only saw the severe cases....
Long but wow I just emotional coming across your comment
I’ve been thinking about this for soo long but thinking I’m just lazy, procrastinating, dumb in school, not applying myself. I really feel like crying this answers so many questions.
i am crying...i dunno what to do...my parents will neverrrr understand me
Reddit have a great ADHD group.
hello crying here too
I teared up when he talked about education 5:10 - I thought it was just me 😥
I feel like crying too! He just described me and I really relate to your comment
The stress drive is a real thing, currently in college I literally cannot bring myself to study every day but when there are days left before an important exam Im magically able to sit my ass down for 20 hours a day and with what feels like having my insides in a vice I'm suddenly able to actually remember the material I study.
Try meds. At 57 I did and they helped alot
Also, study groups can be very helpful.
I have had to do this all my life. I managed to complete 2 degrees but boy was it hard work and so stressful
I completed 4 degrees like this … finished on time because I had financial assistance so I HAD to. It was hell. Mid-term and Finals weeks were always no-sleep or very little sleep (maybe 1 hour a day for a whole week)….
I never knew or even suspected that I have ADHD. Just becoming aware now…
I really hope you can figure out a better way than me! ❤
Best thing-At the beginning of the semester, take the syllabus and write every assignment in 1 calendar. Then look over that calendar every day.
Try to schedule milestones for the bigger papers and projects. I know it doesn’t have the same urgency but maybe you will be better than me at meeting those milestones. (Like Milestone 1: Draft concept,
2: Collect notes from 10 scholarly sources,
3: Finish outline
4: Finish first 2 pages
5: Finish body
6: Finish conclusion
7: Proofread and send to Grammarly for proofreading 2 days before due)
Break the milestones out into weeks before the assignment is due and write in the calendar.
I know it’s hard, but maybe you can do it!! 🎉
42 here. Start finding an alternative asap. Or you’ll be exhausted beyond what you ever thought possible.
I honestly feel really let down by all the adults who said "she's so smart, she's just not applying herself" instead of investigating why. THEY'RE the ones who truly failed my potential. I know it wasn't as widely known about in the 80s and 90s, but my sister is only 3 years younger and she was diagnosed then. If I had any question before, he just cleared that all away. I felt like he was describing me specifically.
I feel the exact same way. If only the adults in my life would have done something to help me… maybe I wouldn’t have struggled on my own for so long.
I was told by my parents "yeah.. you were diagnosed as a kid but we didn't see treatment working and they said it would just brush off".. I'm in my thirties.
People only see your reaction they never think about what caused the reaction.
@@cerberusleviath4575 And it’s understandable, I grew up around it so it all looks pretty normal on the exterior so how would they know?
In my case I figured out how to act around people, how to behave and “warn” them before I even knew I had this.
Whenever I meet people I always throw in the line “I have very bad memory so please do not take it personal if I don’t say hi to you or if I forget your name, I can’t control it”, every single time because I know that’s what’s going to happen unless they have something very characteristic.
I figured out I had ADHD 4-5 days ago, I’m expecting for an appointment next week to validate what I already know.
I heard the same things.
My entire school years were pure luck, never did my homework, barely listened. I had average grades so no one was alarmed. But now I'm in college and it's all falling apart. I feel like everyone thinks I'm just lazy. I am lazy.
I hope you’re not too hard on yourself and that things work out for you in the end, stranger!
I’m fairly certain I have undiagnosed adhd. I tend to day dream a lot and I find it really hard to focus on what I need to if it’s not close to the deadline. I graduated not too long ago and I developed a lot of ways of doing things (coping mechanisms?). One of them was to get the e-version of books if I could in the hopes of being able to use a screen reader. I have a screen reader browser extension that works for most sites and pdfs so that I can listen while I fiddle with something. My major was pretty writing heavy, so I use the speech to text feature on MS Word to start my drafts and then edit as I like. There’s also a feature on there that reads your document so you can use that instead of rereading everything every time. I also made a habit of writing assignments and due dates down all the time as well using apps like egenda and notification makers to remind me of what I need to do and when. Notification makers are especially handy if you’re working on bigger projects and want to remind yourself to focus on certain parts of that project.
This was long and I know you didn’t ask for any tips, but I figured I’d share this anyway! College is mostly about getting your work done and doing it well and on time.
A very good coping mechanism in college, is using that hyper focus, not the day before a paper is do but the whole week. How it worked for me is say I'd have two 10 page papers due on Friday. To the outside world it looked like I did nothing on those two papers till Thursday night, then I brilliantly got them done and got great marks, people were like 'I hate you'. What really happened is different. Starting a week before the papers were due I would think about them in my brain (hyper focus) for select periods of time. Hour here hour there, not all at once, and not at any particular time, then my brain is off to something else and back and ponder the space time continuum or something, who knows in our brains. But, ADHD are great visualizers, we spend half our freaking time visualizing random things. So you look at what happened is that I really spent 2-3 hours a day focusing on those papers in my head, writing, re-writing, etc. the paper. By the time Thursday rolled around, the papers had been done in my head by Wed night. Thursday, I just wrote it all down without stopping, it was easy. So learning to segment your hyper focus to random times during a day, really helps with getting things done.
@@michaelstacie4249 doesn't work. The week after the "hyperfocus" week turns into a complete burn out. It's like my brain is video game, gaining powerups, and when it finally releases the power, everything goes back to normal if not slower
@@jamssy3409 so you figure out what helps you recharge. Video game marathon, couple of days camping in reach of a bar and food. Only you know what and who gives you the necessary distraction/lift/reward.
@@jamssy3409 Yea, what Micelle said is correct, for everyone it's different. So many factors go into the scale of ADHD. Some need meds, some don't, some never knew they had ADHD. I'm one of the ones that never knew. I'm 54 now, very successful, and interact in society fairly well. I've discovered I have a ton of coping mechanisms I've developed over the years, which I never realized till recently why I do these things. I was blessed to be able to pursue my dreams of the software industry. I have no problems with focus or forgetting to do things at work (well no more than anyone else). Best thing is to pursue whatever you are passionate about, a kind of work where it is not work to you. After 30 years in the software industry I'm still disappointed at the end of my work day that I shouldn't be work more. No frets, it will all work itself out.
Protip for the people saying they lost focus during the video: Watch it 2x speed. Feels too fast at first (maybe start with 1.5x) but you get used to it and I swear I can watch hours of educational video now. Even just audio. Makes drifting off less likely for sure.
Standard procedure to any video is put it on 1.5 and immediately skip the intro 😂
ABSOLUTELY GENIUS
Tried this but I can’t process the words at the same speed💀
Sadly not available on the app I’m using. Many’s the time I’ve cursed this lack.
I put it at 1.25 speed and it worked wonderfully.
As someone who's plucking up the courage to go to the GP about this it's quite crushing listening to a professional you've never met detail your life and the struggles you've felt inside for the last 35 years. I just thought I was 'a bit shit at life' compared to everyone else but now I realise I've actually done incredibly well to make it look like I was coping as well as they were. And I'm only 8mins in!
"A bit shit at life" made me laugh. that's my biography title.
@@JamieRambles my autobiography title is “No Regrets” which when my father was dying at 59 he told me he had no regrets (40+ yrs ago). Every chapter of my book, however, would be a story of my various life regrets. I’ve had happy moments but so many times it more than likely was a shit show. Certainly didn’t know about this Dx when I was younger but I needed help. I could’ve been a contender.
@@JamieRambles how can we get the treatment for this condition
Haha! 8 mins in already distracted to make a comment:))
I went to the go 15 years ago asking to be tested for adhd. Assessment was not included under the nhs and would cost £800 back then. I didn’t bother and started medication illegally instead. No wonder only 1 in 4 are diagnosed.
As someone diagnosed with ADD as an adult I can say that it isn't always easy to concentrate on something I enjoy because I start something like a crochet project for instance, my mind starts coming up with other crochet projects I can do and then I end up with 50 unfinished projects. So even stuff I enjoy can be hard to keep up with
This is so painfully true!! I drive my husband crazy (and myself) with the amount of yarn and unfinished projects throughout our entire house (of course, in messy piles, bags, buckets). I have finished so many projects, but I could dress a small army with the amount of unfinished ones I have. I came to this realization very recently (which may be relatable to you or not, so I'm curious). In order for me to focus, especially with things that require me sitting down and listening like conversations or watching a movie, hearing a lecture, or anything that my ears need to hear and my brain needs to process without my mind wandering off, I will crochet. I call it my little therapy. I am able to give my husband undivided attention when he's telling me about his day if I am crocheting. And I realized after looking at all my unfinished projects and feeling ashamed or lazy, I realize that it's the process, not the project that matters. I enjoyed the pattern, the colors, the feel of a particular project, and could enjoy it in THAT moment while being able to functiion and feel more normal, if only for a bit. And isn't that really a lot of what we desire? So now I look at my 80% done scarf that i started over a year ago (that really all it needs to be finished is a border, tying in the ends, and fringe lol), and I can see it as "That scarf helped me through that time of my life while I worked on it. And I made it through. And it helped then in that moment. Whi ch in turn helps me now in this moment.
I was somewhat forced into making a scarf with a loom. I was super pumped with the first one. got it done in a week while at work and in downtime. Started a second a little while later, took 3 weeks. Later made a third, and that was about 3 months because progress stopped midway when the loom fell over and I had to restart. I haven't made anything since.
I enjoy learning about history, but I often have to remind what I'm watching because I start zoning out. Even if it's something I REALLY want to listen to, and focus my attention on, seconds later my concentration starts to drift to inner thoughts, daydreams, or even something going on around me like a dang spider building its web. It's frustrating, but I just look at it as even if I don't hear it the first time, or second, or third lol, if I'm repeating it, my brain is subconsciously picking it up still. Because I am still listening....my focus is just elsewhere.
At least its easy to buy presents for us! Thousands of hobbies and projects to choose from.
i am the same way with my crochet AND my other artworks. I have so many blender 3D files of unfinished projects and drawing files of drawings i never finished but always intended to finish. My sketchbooks have always been like that as well. I remember friends and siblings always asking me why i never finish stuff? cause they will see me flip through to a new page or they might look through my books. I never really had a good explanation other than, well i thought about something else i guess. Though it isn't until it gets mentioned when i actually take notice of how much i actually only half my projects.
I cried watching this because I really wanna see a doctor now
So did I. Couldn't be happier to have come across this. Now I know there's a name for what I have been going through and that I need help.
Same. 🥺
Same, every single point was dead on. Now I'm thinking where do I go from here?
You done it yet
Same here. Felt so understood and seen. It’s actually so conforting to have someone confirm that you’re struggles exist and are valid and are not your fault
The part where he said it gets harder at secondary school was so on point... that's when I realized school was difficult, not because of the learning, but because I had to manage my homework time, worry about not forgetting my stuff, do well on tests under pressure, pick the school bus at the same hour every day. That was also the time I realized I was "weird".
Got difficult for me at uni. I use to wing it at school and college
It is not weird, i'm 36 now, finish uni, just need to try a little harder, and preparation.
I made it through uni with pretty good grades, but there were way too many stressful nights where procrastination kicked me in the behind. Now that I'm a teacher, I'm actually feeling the strain worse than ever because the other teachers don't seem to struggle to focus on things the way that I do... I've assumed I was ADD for some years, but in the last week I've become even more convinced of it.
You were not weird. You lacked diagnosis and support
I excelled from grades 1-10 with no study, struggled with 11, failed 12 (first time) & had to repeat. We had describing my academic history & adult life from 4:40 onwards!
This just made me cry so much. At 52 I’ve felt so misunderstood my whole life and no one wants to hear you have ADHD, they just think you’re making excuses for your behaviour.
That is true. 😢
Yup, I've been told to just get on with it. I've been told " You've got this far, suck it up." (In my 50s) Or "yes everyone does that, it's nothing special"
My mother...
I’m 70. Such a long trail of regret. I’m seeing my GP next week.
I’m 52 too and only this year have been told that I may have ADHD. He describes me to a T. Not had a diagnosis yet.
Uses stress to generate focus - SO TRUE.
I had no difficulty in college because I could speed read the highlights of my textbooks, and do my homework in class while ignoring the painfully boring lectures. My difficulty has been with life. If I managed one area well, another one would crash.
Yep. Hyper focus at work means I can’t get bills in the mail.
So true! I've ended up being one of those who can keep some relationships going but move jobs every couple of years and never progress past entry level.
@@jennivamp5 I hear you! I could never fathom finishing a bachelor’s degree, so I can’t really move up in my career due to the dreaded “must have a bachelor or master degree to apply.”
It was working for me but then I had some intensely stressful things happen and I think I broke my stress response and now it doesn’t cut it :(
I always used the spinning plate on a stick analogy... I could never get all plates of life up and spinning at the same time!..
Oh my god. I have never felt more *seen* in my life. I've gone my entire life wondering why, after sailing through primary and secondary school (admittedly pulling all nighters for pretty much the entirety of secondary school to turn in work on time) with outstanding grades and being at the top of my class, I flunked so hard out of university. Not once. Not twice. But three times. I kept trying and kept dropping out. I was told I was gifted and brilliant early in life, and so in pursuing higher education I fully expected to become an accomplished academic... to instead have been such a complete and utter failure drove me to substance abuse and severe depression. Wow. So much to think about. Every single characteristic Dr. Humphries talked about here applies to me.
I'm experiencing this right now.
I could have written this word for word and am sobbing at this video because it's described my life
@@samsaloser8258 I'm already in the process of getting my life together. At least now we KNOW that there's an issue. Knowing is half of the battle brother. WE CAN DO THIS. I have an immense amount of retake work to do for the 3rd of August but since watching this video and hearing what other folks have to say about how to cope, things seem a little clearer. Try and write things down instead of typing, just write down a plan or carry a notepad around with you. Fullscreen mode on desktops or laptops helps a lot as well.
Exact same story here
Me too holy crap he is describing my life. Top of my class in primary school, great in middle school, upper quartile in middle school and CRASHED in Uni. I'm now on my 3rd tertiary qualification and still trying to find out what I'm doing with my life. I have done almost every single assessment in 6 years of study the day it was due, due to adrenaline. Fark.
i misread this, thought the title was “should you be arrested for adhd” i was like bro i hope not
Hahaha. Unfortunately many end up arrested as life unravels
😂😂😂
I'm 80 years old and just wrote this poem regarding ADHD I responded to pressure it was my only starter. ADHD
The one-legged man saw no path ahead.
Clutching at chances he caught in the air.
Only the moment, no tomorrow was there?
He was blind to the debris behind in his wake.
He was caught in a trap, locked in a cage.
The cassette explained a hopping bipedal here in the zoo.
Some saw him high; some saw him low; all saw him with two.
A spectacular show, those stories he told while rolling downhill.
No one had noticed he only had one, the tales he told were as if he had two.
The cassette was right, and the cassette was wrong.
That one-legged man was very confused, he also saw two.
It never occurred that he only had one.
The one-legged man, now incredibly old, his energy spent from hopping around.
Grew tired of running against others with two.
Something was wrong, patterns emerged.
He suddenly woke from this dream so very disturbed.
All the debris he saw in his wake overwhelmed.
His tears streamed for him; his tears streamed for them.
He finally realized he was a two-legged man who only had one.
That one-legged man is me.
This is moving, thank u for sharing. I told my psychiatrist that it always felt like life was a freeway, and there I was trying to keep up with other cars zooming by while I pushed my car with a flat tire.
This is by far the most comprehensive and helpful lecture on ADHD that I have come across. Very eye opening.
yes, agree, great video! if you want another great one, check this: ua-cam.com/video/ouZrZa5pLXk/v-deo.html
I saw the Dr. Brown vid last year and cried and cried, stopped after ten minutes and spent another ten trying to get it set up on the “smart” TV so hubby could watch it with me. Cried off and on for a few days. I felt so seen! All of those years of derision, chastisement, self debasement and character annihilation…
I’m not lazy! I’m not undisciplined, I’m not just rude or inattentive - I mean, sure I am but not because of selfishness or bad character. I felt so light. Now I can figure out how to work with it and it helps my spouse to be more patient with my wandering off the subject (a to d, j, z, b indeed).
You are good too!
I learn the most from older youtubers. It's unfortunate that most popular youtubers are younger and less educated.
@@ludvigelmquist1288 This is exactly what I was going to comment! the video by understood is just as comprehensive as this video!
I’ve never felt so seen!!! Hit the nail on the head with literally EVERYTHING. Oh man. The moving jobs every few months, losing interest with most things, never finishing anything, procrastinating, but needing the stress in order to focus, driving yourself into a stressed state, my thoughts being all over the place, ZONING OUT. I can’t NOT zone out. I hate that the most! Issues with emotional regulation 🤦🏼♀️ Can’t believe I’ve gone 30 years not knowing that I’ve had ADHD
Right? I'm crying this is so accurate
I would recommend that you see a professional before diagnosing yourself with ADHD.
@@Prolegomena1781 yup I did after seeing this video and turns out I have ADHD like I suspected
I'm seeing this now and it snapped me back to attention as he was talking about the deadlines.. Feeling seen is the truth!
same here for me too. I grew up thinking it wasn't even a real thing, and it was just misdiagnosed and overdiagnosed. This is what I was taught growing up. I didn't learn about ADHD until TikTok!!!! Of All Places!!! Seriously, it shouldn't have taken me so long. Now I don't know how anyone missed it.
Never leave comments but this video has just made me burst into tears! It literally felt like the doctor was talking directly to me. When he talked about GCSEs being ok, then A Levels a bit of a struggle, then unwinding at Uni, that was exactly me. And then having numerous jobs and finding it hard to settle or maintain relationships. I've just turned 50. Looking back I wish I'd known this at 20. Hopefully now I can get tested and get a diagnosis and things can be better from here. Thank you, doctor. You may have just saved a life and turned it around.
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They're on Instagram
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couldve written this exact same comment myself, endlessly grateful for this doctor and this video
Me too. Literally my exact life. Good god.
Just wanted to leave a comment to say this video was the reason I questioned if I had ADHD and got myself assessed. So I’m coming back a few months later, diagnosed (at 31) to say thank you for opening up the door to understanding that allowed me to ask the right questions and find the appropriate help.
🙏🏻
I'm 72 and finally feel I can stop feeling guilty about how my life has panned out. Next stage is to get an appointment with Dr Humphries and get some meds which might work better than anti-depressants!
What help did you get?
@@alicejackson771 do you have any
Pain.symptimsmsure the have add.xhild.just diagnosed
Hi Poppy, did it help?? I am 20 years old, really struggling with this, haven't been to a doctor to get diagnosed. My parents are against it and I am not sure enough to push for it much. Do the meds help?? Would really appreciate a response, I need to figure this out while I can...
OMG he’s so kind and understanding. I got diagnosed three and a half months ago. After a life of being told I need to just try harder; meanwhile I was totally wrecked, depressed and anxious from TRYING, hearing someone be so compassionate and non-judgemental is like getting the biggest hug. I literally feel teary. Thank you ♥️
Hi, how has the diagnosis impacted your life since? Have you started any medication or anything? I suspect I have it myself, just curious if it has changed much for you.
Congrats, hon! ♥️🙏🏽
With you. I cried, as an Adult, in relief that there was an explanation!
I understand and feel the same way. I'm waiting for a referral to see someone specializing in adult ADHA. If I don't have, I'll feel disappointed. I hopes it is the reason I am the way I am. Either that or I'm just wacked.
"from TRYING" - this is ssoooo true!
My very degree was built off of that stress 😂. Many a times I stayed up typing up my essays to submit them at 8am the finale moment to return to my bed and sleeping the rest it the day.
Lol I did my entire portfolio(a semester’s work based on 2 years of school) in 3 straight days of nearly constant work. I too, slept for 2 days after my portfolio defense.😂
ok but after you’re done did it give you a sense of satisfaction ?💀 at some point i changed it into a challenge to see if i could make it😭
Uni was like that. School was different, i ended up having to spend double as long as everyone else rote learning for my GCSEs and A levels like a movie script to make it go in to my memory
Am I the only one who feels a weird mixture of pride and shame after stuff like this? Like I know you should have started earlier but I'm also proud that I actually can do it so last minute😬😅... Almost like a challenge?
Same! In high school I’d stay up all night once a week to do the majority of my schoolwork.
He hit 12 minutes and I lost my focus. Then he said, “most people with ADHD have trouble focusing for more than 10 minutes” lol
12.01 and I’m in here reading comments!
Lol I know same 😂 UA-cam premium let it continue while I scrolled Facebook lol
11.40 😭
Works better dividing day into short spurts of activity and lots of rest in between
8min in and caught myself reading comments multiple times and am in for the 2nd time
Sadly, as an almost 70 year old, this has confirmed what I've recently been suspecting. How different my life would have been if I'd been assessed and received timely treatment. Hopefully others will benefit from this enabling them to lead full and stable lives.
You could also benefit
It's not too late. Seniors with adhd have special needs too!
Do you feel like it has gotten worse as you got older?
Mood and sleep are immediately impacted for the better on medication. I also can have more balanced thoughts/emotions and not be as self critical or feel that people are critical of me.
Days are more productive. No sleeping in. Able to get to work on time. (Still a major multi layered issue but it's a big help). Food cravings or just diet are better. List goes on.
@@scpatl4now I would say so. Not by a huge amount, but yes, more pronounced. I find that regular meditation helps. That is, when I do it regularly, even for only 10 mins per day. I think that if I actually stuck to it, I'd see more improvement.
The fear being the trigger to the only way of focus or to act is definitely something I relate to 100%.
I cant belive he put this into words. I never heard of this before but its the only way i can do something. If im under imense pressure or stress i need fo feel adrenaline to do something fml
That's how I get up in the morning and be productive. I thought sense I became a stay at home mom I just lost my enthusiasm for life. Nope. I just lost the anxiety of having to get to a job at a certain time and now that I don't have any set standards I'm floundering. 😕
@@libelulafreddy that’s exactly it! It’s this fear that suddenly makes me do phone calls or stuff like that, when usually thinking about making a phone call would be horror. Put fear of for example a deadline in the mix and suddenly I’m unstoppable
Yes that's why it's really dangerous to rely on that cuz once you're adult enough, and less things scare you, the 'fear' that got you to concentrate is no longer effective... So what to do then?
I relate so much to this as well, I literally do all my assignments at the last minute even when I have tons of time to do them, I have been suspecting that I have ADHD for a while now but I didn't make the connection until now
The part about SSRIs was really interesting. I’ve been on several, and they never helped my motivation, but just made me less sad about the things I couldn’t get done, which honestly made things worse.
I feel seen!
An aha moment for me too, several months on SSRIs for social anxiety and just started thinking it might not be the right drug for me.
Aside from nasty side effects, all they did was numb me down, which all made it ten times (at least) worse. So yeah, I feel you.
I agree. The SSRI meds just put a damper on emotions. A few years ago I was struggling with depression and lack of motivation. I couldn’t keep up with work and lost several clients. My doctor recommended I increase my citalopram SSRI (Celexa) from 20 to 40mg, and I went further downhill fast, often couldn’t even get out of bed. I got switched to Bupropion (Wellbutrin) a few months later, which helped, but it wasn’t until I was diagnosed with ADHD and started medication that I was able to pull out of that deep funk and get productive again.
@@DonnaMcMasterRiver Wellbutrin made me extremely dizzy, even while lying down, so I stopped taking it (doctor agreed). I wonder if it would've helped, if not for that particular side effect.
I just broke down in tears at this. My entire life I've been called 'retard' 'stupid' 'lazy' even though I've tried my best the whole time. I'm 34 and after finding ou tabout adult ADHD I've incorporated some basic coping techniques and I'm getting my life on track. I cannot afford to be assessed and the NHS waiting list is 4+ years but this video gives me the confidence to keep going. I'm not what people say I am!
I applied 6 months ago and have a letter saying they will see me in 2 weeks. go for it brother it will be faster than you think
@@DogsWallop all you people doing it for a TREND makes me sick..you really don’t need meds at 34…stop using social media for mental health advice for starters😂 tik tok influencers and Insta and UA-cam clout chasers are people ABUSING the mental health system
@@DogsWallop which part of country you in? Im really needing meds, I was on diazepam for 40yrs and theyve been stopped, Im in Yorkshire
The waiting times vary in different areas. If necessary you have the right to request an assessment out of your area to speed things up. I had my first assessment within a couple of months of my GP's referral.
❤️❤️❤️
40 years of just thinking its just the way I am.
I am just finding the answers now at 68!
Screwed up the rest of my life, diagnosis of depression & anxiety but never tested for ADHD.
Now as a retired Brit living in Germany, supported for depression, the support system has suggested getting tested for ADHD, my research brought me to this video, and shock to hear this clear description of my life.
I feel you. I knew kinds of in my 40s but it never became a true disaster until several traumatic events happened. Now it is horrid. However like you I. Was not diagnosed till 68. Put on meds which were a miracle at first now I’m in hell zone again
How are you now dear?
Diagnosed at 60 here. Now I understand why my life was so hard.
Hi..did you have treatment ..if yes what kind ? Thanks
"They can concentrate on computer games for days on end but cannot do 10 minutes of homework".
Oh. My. God.
Such an accurate depiction
When this doctor described my whole academic experience, that was a little creepy. I even managed to graduate uni relying on the stress of deadline. I did do assignments that I had to turn in, although often in the morning or already in class. As for the homework I did not have to turn in or if there was a chance they wouldn't ask me - I rarely did it. I never came to the exams prepared completely because I'd start a night or two before the exam and of course I wasn't able to go through all of it. I failed my exam just once. I finished both of my theses (bachelor's and master's) on the day of presenting them.
I'm not diagnosed but I'm getting closer to booking my appointment with a doctor...
Yeah, same. I got a first for my BSc, but only because I took six months off to focus on my dissertation. Currently struggling with my MSc dissertation. Which reminds me, I really should email my supervisor back 🤥
Yeah that got to me as well, I still got two years to do for my double degree conjoint and the stress is real bad
Duuude same here lol I’m doing a PhD now and it finally caught up to me… mostly XD
Same.. I was an A student in elementary school, but slowly fell off as soon as it had gotten more complex. With a huge amount of work and stress I somehow passed, but going for my Bachelor's degree was just a total mess. I barely made it and the only reason I had a good grade at the end was that my theses was just captivating enough for me to manage it somewhat decent. The sad part is, even though I've gotten a very good grade and my professors liked my work, the whole time it felt like I did the bare minimum of what I was capable of.
Also most people tell me how freeing and great their time studying was overall and whenever I think back all I can remember is stress and dread.
@@killaknight12 I am in stress in dread rn ahaha, I was supposed to be watching my lectures and ended up falling asleep twice🥲 now idk how many lectures there are to watch
I’m 72. I pursued a diagnosis about five months ago after watching this video and recognizing the story of my life. Over thirty years of therapy had helped very little and as he noted, the SSRI meds kept me from crying but made it harder for me to get things done. Today I just completed my second month of Adderol XR and the psychiatrist is increasing the dose from 20 to 30mg. We’ve been ramping up slowly to make sure it doesn’t cause problems with my blood pressure but so far I haven’t observed any side effects. What I HAVE observed is that I just finished a project that has been blocking my progress for over two years, and my depression has gone down from a zombie-like 9+ to a 1 or 2. I am so grateful to Dr. Humphries and Harley Therapy for helping me identify the problem that 35 years of therapists and psychologists had been unable to recognize. (And how did UA-cam figure out that I needed to watch this video?)
I'm so glad you're doing better. I don't have typical traits of inattention when speaking to people face to face, but I have many other symptoms like very bad procrastination, not working unless stressed by necessary deadlines, multiple unfinished projects, driven by dopamine, and wandering thoughts. I really have no idea if I'm just finding an excuse as to why my life is in a slump, or if there's really a medical reason behind my behaviour. Thanks for sharing your story!
"The SSRI meds kept me from crying but made it harder for me to get things done."
For the life of me, I cannot understand why a doctor would recommend anti-depressants, which slow a person down, to help them become numb to the fact that they are getting slowed down even more. Thus needing even more anti-depressants.
Yeah like you need adderol or the dosage upped at 72😂😂
usually youtube recommends you videos based off of the audience of other channels you watch. you probably unknowingly began watching or have been watching videos that are more popular with potential adhd people, or others that like this video have similar watch habits. it’s tricky and amazing that this video got to you :) im so glad you were able to figure that out for yourself, and you’re feeling better.
Better late than never! Best wishes.
My toxic trait as someone possibly with ADHD is thinking I'll be listening to the video while performing other important tasks at the same time.
Literally watched this to procrastinate during an all-nighter. I am currently only 3 pages into my final and it is 8:46am. The essay is two days late, and I have to do a move later today. I am going to get checked out. Thank you to this guy.
That’s got nothing to do with ADHD…go look at tik tok if your chasing clout
I wish you all the best .So be it , if procrastination lead you to stumble across this video! Ultimately it's your choice if you want to empower yourself with an accurate and professional opinion.
@@lukehanlon3814 Quite literally he discusses procrastination as part of ADHD in adults in the video.
same... finishing up an assignment for grad school that's due in 2 hrs... i can't keep doing this! it's unsustainable and i need to get help
@@kateneff1796 100% unsustainable indeed. You can miss a surprising amount of sleep in your early 20s but it will catch up with you later. Much better to prevent that. It’s no coincidence that top athletes prioritise sleep like they do.
Didn't think I'd be able to focus through this video but my hypersensitivity loves this guy's voice 😳
Me too! I stopped listening and started playing games on my phone at some point, but kept the video on because it's soothing
Yeah I’m listening but not ‘listening’
Oh my God I’m practically crying with relief. 58 years old and I’ve never been able to figure out why my life is so disorganized. Diagnosed with depression and anxiety and on meds for the past 30 years but still feel like something is “off.” I feel like I’ve found the missing puzzle piece. Thank you thank you 🙏🏻
I'm 56 ..... Yay. I'm glad this is starting to make more sense out of disorganization etc.. There's hope! I'm waiting for appointment referral for diagnosis.
I'm 48, diagnosed just before my most recent birthday. I know what you mean. Still coming to terms with the repercussions and just how much of my life's more negative events can be tracked back to this, especially when you consider my 5th school report card (for art): Alan has a lot of great ideas. It would be nice if he finished some of them.
72 years old and just diagnosed a few months ago. I wept for all those years of struggles but I can also see all the risks I took and the joy I found in trying new things and achieving unexpected results. 🙃
@@Alan_Duval The surprise has been looking back at all my abandoned projects and realizing that I still believed I would finish them someday! 😂
@@DonnaMcMasterRiver löl
My schooling experience described to an absolute tee. Officially diagnosed with ADHD at 30!
I wasn’t to hyper as a child but I was extremely inattentive and distracted. My parents would sometimes say I’m lazy and be disappointed with me bc I’d never do homework and or I’d just lose it or misplace it. My mother arranged a parent teacher conference in 9th grade to see what they thought about me having adhd. They said I’m not hyper or loud, just need to be more organized and do the homework. It hurt because it felt like no one understood how hard these were for me. I could barely read a paragraph in a book because I’d start day dreaming or tune out and forget what I just read.
I was exactly the same. Shit, im 33 now and to be realistic... not much has changed
Wow, those idiots of your school must've never heard of ADD. Just like ADHD but without the hyper part. That's what my brother has too. Also, especially in girls, the 'hyper' could also show itself more internally. The outside world would have a hard time noticing as it's only the mind that is hyper active. That's what my mom has.
I'm only 19 but even I grew up in a time when ADHD was just 'the kid who can't sit still' (and that's only cared for because it's a problem to the surroundings, such as school). The actual experience of people having AD(H)D in our society/system seems to never have been focused on and this has to change.
About reading the paragraph, anything you read or do you space out just from perhaps a general disinterest in what you're reading?
Yes, I was in the Principals office a lot and was always told I wasn’t living up to my potential. Summer school and tutoring never helped much.
Omg!!! This is exactly me
Being diagnosed with a heap of things like depression and anxiety and still searching what is 'wrong' with me, this video legit made me cry. How is it possible you just described me and my life to a T..
You are not alone, I was like you wondering what was wrong with me, Did a lot of research and it turned out I had ADHD. Now I feel somewhat empowered just by KNOWING THIS CONTIDION has a name "ADHD" 😭😭.
This is me 100 %, always thought my diagnosis of anxiety and low grade depression wasn't quite right. I've waited till I'm 55 to find the answer. It's never too late
I was diagnosed with ADHD at 36 and put on Vyvanse. It was shocking to my current psychiatrist that I hadn't been diagnosed yet, as I was diagnosed and medicated for depression and anxiety disorders when I was 14.
At first it was extremely frightening to watch myself change, as I have always been very self aware and comfortable with who I was. I realized quickly that the person I was at that time couldn't exist on the medication and that made me feel very uncomfortable. Saying goodbye to that person was difficult for me. With that said, the change was phenomenal. It was quickly noticed by every single person in my life and the positive changes that came to my life, driven by my own healthy and conscious decisions and motivations for the very first time, were truly extraordinary and unexpected to me. Absolutely phenomenal.
@@sbef Go for it! Do what you have to do to live your best life!
I actually started crying when he said “you might feel like you are somewhat different.” Honestly that is exactly what I was thinking when I finally decided that it was time to see if I have ADHD. I’m 32 years old and have always felt different cognitively. My main struggle in life has just been trying to be normal. Trying to function in a world that doesn’t seem like it was made for me. I rarely cry. But that one statement brought me to uncontrollable tears.
“Trying to function in a world that doesn’t seem like it was made for me” I say this constantly
Me too. I’m 46 years old and have battled through life wearing “masks” because I’ve always struggled to fit in. It’s like my whole life was just described in a 13 minute video
When I was your age they told me ADDHA goes away with age so I just continued on as before. Don't do that, get some help. Im 82 now and Im going to try. I wonder what it will be like.
@@clairee3612 I'm 46 too and am trying so hard to find someone who will give me an assessment. I was diagnosed when I was a kid, but it never went into my medical charts. My doctor, at the time, in the 1980s, didn't believe in giving children stimulant medication. So, I went to my psychiatrist a few weeks ago and when I tried to update him on what my (current) doctor said about stimulant medication (my doctor was interested in how adderall affected me when I tried it a few years ago - it helped me and I had absolutely no euphoria from it), he said to me, "Every time you come in here you talk about the same thing". Well, NO DUH! I'm trying to get HELP! I reported back to my doctor what my psychiatrist said to me and he told me to find a new psychiatrist right away. No one should be talked to the way I was by a medical "professional". Anyway, just felt the need to reply to you, being that we're the same age and I am losing hope. :(
@@10laws2liveby keep us updated! My dad is 80 and I always thought he had ADHD like me. I would love to hear how you make out. Good luck!
This video is what led to my diagnosis a year ago. My psychologist had suggested that she thought I had ADHD but my parents didn't believe her.
I always excelled at school despite quite literally never doing any work. I got through GCSEs easily and went on to do 4 A levels. I had always had a history of panic attacks but usually I had them maybe once or twice a month and only when a particularly stressful situation arose. When I went to college I started off very well, top of my classes, the novelty of the situation made it easy for me to focus. Then about a month to two months in, I started slipping. I didn't do my work, I was late all the time and the lack of structure in a college environment meant that I could skip classes or entire days without repercussions (very bad set up for someone with ADHD, if I wanted to stay home and paint or play games instead I just would). This meant I started to fall behind, I'm very sensitive to rejection and criticism (rejection sensitive dysphoria) so if say id only done half of the homework for one of my classes, I simply wouldn't show up, I was too scared, so my attendance dropped and dropped. I was having panic attacks every single day, even just trying to leave my house. I remember I had a meeting with my tutor to discuss the problems I was having and I explained that I wasn't coming in because of my panic attacks but that the panic attacks weren't the problem, they were a symptom of something else, I couldn't keep up, I couldn't do the work. Nobody understood and I didn't either, they thought I meant the work was too hard or there was too much but it wasn't that, the work itself was easy I just couldn't sit and do it.
I spent weeks and weeks going to my psychologist with this flow chart I had made: something was hindering my ability to do my studies -> that was making me fall behind -> falling behind was leading to panic attacks because I'm very sensitive to failure -> the panic attacks were stopping me from attending -> not attending was making me fall even further behind.... spiralling in a circle. I was trying to explain that the panic attacks weren't what needed treating right now, they were a reaction to another problem and without that problem being solved, nothing would help the panic attacks. It took a year of trying to explain to people, in the end I gave up and dropped out, I was very low for a while and was diagnosed with depression. When I started feeling better I decided to start studying again online and went back to my psychologist and talked to her about how I was nervous about it because I've never been able to study unless I was in a classroom with a strict/scary teacher and essentially was too scared to mess around or text or do something else so with it being online and therefore completely lacking structure I didn't think id actually ever study. It was like a lightbulb went off in her head and she pulled out her iPad and started asking me questions and then turned it around and it said, "based on your answers to this indicative questionnaire, it is highly likely you have ADHD combined type". and she said I think we finally know what's going with you and told my parents (who immediately said that's impossible because i did so well at school and completely ignored it)
I showed this video to my parents about three months after my psychologist suggested ADHD and finally they considered it may be a possibility and they paid for me to have a consultation with a private psychiatrist and there we have it. ADHD combined type, Elvanse 40mg and a lot of work figuring out personal strategies and now I'm back in education, doing a degree in forensic psychology with the open university and hoping to specialise in ADHD in the prison population so thank you very much Dr. Humphries. Without a doubt, this video saved my life.
Dude, you just described my WHOLE LIFE. Right now my grades at uni are TANKING. i went from never getting below 75% (by pure luck, never studied and only did assignments last minute) to barely getting 50%. I realised i didnt even have to do my assignments on time... i could procrastinate them and hand them in late with a penalty...thats how much i cant motivate myself.
Im going to be seeing my GP asap.. i was on the fence about mentioning it to my GP but now that ive seen your comment and my struggles arent even uncommon, im going to seek a diagnosis. Thanks for sharing ❤
Did the Elvanse help focus and motivation?
This was an epic read on a few levels. Top.marks on your self-awareness through your psychological mud scape.
Im trying to figure out what the hell is holding me back in life because I've missed out on so much, and I'm nearly 50 x
What a interesting story you have . Congratulations of pushing through and your , success at helping others with their struggles 👏
Fucking hell this is like looking at a mirror - never would've been diagnosed as a child, coasted through NCEA, fell apart at uni. Anxiety/panic attacks and agoraphobia compounding things.
In the process of getting a specialist referral for an ADHD diagnosis now at 24.
"Inattentive presentation" ... "Daydreamer" ... "Hyperfocus"... "Chronic procrastination" ... "Distracted mid task" ... "Bills don't get paid" ... "zoning out mid conversation" ... "disorganisation" ... He just kept spitting things that's... so me. 😭
Makes me want to cry.
I feel like you have defined my whole life. I used to joke that I was self-diagnosed ADHD but I never looked into what the symptoms or experiences for people were. I literally have had it since childhood and I never knew why I was the way I was. Always losing focus, losing interest when things that do not stimulate me anymore. House chores, I HATE with a passion, it never gets completely done, I only work my absolute best under pressure or deadlines! Easily distracted, lost in thought, forgetfulness, and I struggled with college after high school. I am smart but I am easily distracted and if it is not interesting to me, I don't want to do it. I have started and stopped many things! It's really enlightening that you shed light on what makes me this way.
God I hate house chores want to delegate it
Let me geuss do you also have the chair of clothes that are not clean but not quite dirty yet? And then you just leave it until it becomes a mountain of laundry so you are forced to sort through it every 3 months or so? 😅
I work pretty consistently and with lots of focus on my art, but that's something I've wanted all my life! I taught myself that focus, I think. When it comes to chores however I have 0,0 desire to invest myself like I did with drawing/painting. I just can't do it. It is sooo boring.
I don't know if hating to do laundry is an ADHD symptom or if it's just chore hate. I used to think that's normal. But my flatmate has no problem keeping her space tidy. I could never!!
@@Janehaver that is currently happening in my room and has been my whole life
well are you clinically diagnosed with adhd now?
This explains a lot. I'm at my best when I'm stressed. Normal people suffer in those conditions, but I operate at full capacity, I'm on fire. So much so that I sometimes have to create those conditions to be able to get things done and I always get them done to a very exceptional standard, but I must look like a complete psychopath to anybody watching me. I also clean ALL of my house at the same time. Moving from room to room doing little bits at a time or I get bored, so it's all pretty much completed at the same time.
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Same. So much this, to the point that I specifically chose a high stress job (first responder) because I only ever feel my head clear in extreme situations.
@@panampace probably why I do nursing and specifically float nursing because I’ll never know what I’m getting into, so the challenges come.
Yes. I always try to recreate those conditions too, and hey, when i had a job whike studying at school, i actually achieved wayy better grades
@@ADR-xn6dg how do you do it? I realized I couldn't go into Nursing because I was too afraid of missing small details or making the same mistakes repeatedly, both of which could cost a patient their life. Not to mention the idea of having a patient's life in the hands of a person who regularly forgets where their keys are.. just no 😂 In addition to keeping your head clear, do you think the constant pressure keeps you hyper aware of possible mistakes?
I'm a 43 year old woman who is being currently assessed for adult ADHD. You have just struck every single nerve with me and described what I've been trying to put across for a long time in the perfect way. Thank you. And thank you to the commenters for being so open and showing the world we don't have to hide away our true selves any more.
May i ask how your diagnosis went?
I'm 38 and a GP friend told me recently that they are almost certain I have ADHD and need to go get diagnosed. I laughed, I'm not hyperactive in the slightest. Yet here I am with someone I've never met describing my life and struggles better than I could if I tried.
39 here and my daughter has it, she was diagnosed 10 years ago…but it presented differently (the hyperactivity) so I never put 2 and 2 together. I was diagnosed 2 days ago and I feel like a fog has been lifted.
Its freaky...has he been watching us?😂
I've got my first phone call with a specialist in 15 mins and since I woke up all I've been doing is researching and watching videos like this. Wow I feel he just described my life! I didnt have "my foot on the gas" through Primary and Highschool and I went from being predicted A*s across the board to Bs and Cs. I always thought I was smart enough to not need to revise and that I'd get what I needed to hit A Levels. Boy A levels is where the wheels fell off for me rather than university... I ran out of steam in the first year and my inability to focus on revision and particularly the coursework I didnt enjoy or want to do made me suffer and feel inadequate. I bombed the 2nd year and I retook year 13 only for the motivation to pass and the same thing happened again. Fuck me if only I knew then what I know now.. I wish I'd had a better understanding of ADHD then as it may have saved my higher education and helped me out in so so many social situations.
similar but failed all subjects but one, moved college, did my a2 allong side a btec, went university failed twice then dropped out first year. ( all while being the person in class that people asked for help)
Same here... everyone could spend 1 hour revising and it would take me 3 to get the same information in
How did your assessment go?
@@lightwork5414 that is exactly what happening with me, I'm just getting around to having a word now in my final year. Shit fell apart the second there isn't a strict schedule and perciatant deadlines throughout.
@@borderlinecontent8661 its a minefield of a battle, happy you're trying to catch it at this point. NHS will have something else to say about that though. tik tok.
im sitting here crying because i thought that i was crazy and lazy with no drive and this video summarized my whole life. thank you so much.
me too
Didn't expect this guy to summarize my entire life in 13 minutes. Didn't expect this guy to summarize my entire life in 13 minutes.
Watching this may have just changed my life. I've been this person since forever. Not hyperactive, driven by deadline fear and a master procrastinator. Excelled under pressure, high distinctions then next semester couldn't open the lid of my computer screen. One extreme to the other. On my way for a psychiatric assessment after seeing my GP this morning.
Thankyou
@@Chlunkon Hey Emilia. It was a few weeks wait and ended up being a one hour telehealth video consultation. Went through my history right back to highschool and then my work history, what I have experienced/noticed and was going through. That was it in a nutshell and I was happy. My daughter also has adhd so that put me in the frame also.
I am now on meds as required but they have helped me stay on task for my uni assignments and I haven't been anywhere near as overwhelmed as I was getting.
To be honest it was quite an easy process and just be frank open and honest. Disclaimer, there questions about trauma and abuse to rule out any other diagnosis but that's not definitive I believe.
Good luck
@@Chlunkon go for it. Worst case scenario, you get to know yourself a lot better. Best case scenario, you can change you life for ever. And for the better. It is a bit rough, there are some questions who can/will bring you to tears (mine was when he asked me how many jobs in different areas I had had since becoming an adult) and there's of course a lot of questions to rule out other conditions - but don't feel discouraged, the assessment is mostly based on conversation and questions.
Getting diagnosed from Tele health or a computer screen dosent mean you have adhd buddy…you seem like a clout chasing Insta person like the rest here who DONT have ADHD😂
@@carlamgraca yeah other one who used the pandemic to get meds cause you don’t have to have a proper diagnosis…
Samesies
So the fact that I was frighteningly close to failing my Masters was _not_ entirely due to laziness and depression? Uh-oh. 😳
Right?!?! I barely made it through mine, and I keep saying it was dumb luck, but the fact that I was able to finish it, on time, despite everything going on is just…WOW. Why couldn’t I have been diagnosed earlier? I’d be so much further ahead in life than I am now 😑
I’m doing my masters now and am terrified of my thesis next year. Even now I don’t really need to study and will just do the assignments the day they are due and get good marks. But I don’t know how I’m going to get the sustained work done that a thesis requires 😬😬
Hey, @@amaliedigby1231! I just (just barely) finished my thesis, and I am in therapy (most likely have ADHD). I would like to share some of the things that either my therapist or experience has taught me.
(1) One of the most important things my therapist told me: knowing you have to something or wanting to do something and feeling like doing it, are very different things. If the feeling of urgency is not there, our brains will simply not do the work. The most important thing is to create a feeling of urgency/necessity. E.g., if I leave any empty space on my schedule barely anything will get done. Placing my work-time (like 2 hours) in between two other tasks that I REALLY have to do (if you can plan something with someone else, even better, because you won't feel as comfortable to move your tasks around), helps me be more productive than if I give myself "a whole aftternoon/day".
(2) Interacting with my thesis co-advisor, and having several deadlines to give work updates, also helped productivity (specially right after receiving feedback). If you don't have a co-advisor, I'd recommend asking someone you trust for something like monthly feedbacks (and everytime you HAVE to give something new to them).
(3) Starting my work-time with a challenge also helps me break the "just starting" wall. The one I use right now is challenging myself to work for 20 min without other distractions. It's simple, but it has been working for me, others may work better for you, just keep trying and eventually you will find it - e.g., some people really work well with reward-systems.
(4) Letting go completely from wanting things to come out perfectly from the get go. E.g., when writing my thesis I would just "put in paper" whatever I was thinking. This also helps me just start working and also to plan things and keep a steadier train of thought.
I hope some of these help! 😅
I feel you! My masters was horrible and I mainly got through it because I had the best thesis advisor and lots of luck. I was diagnosed with depression and anxiety disorder and blamed it all on it.
Envy you guys getting to that stage even. I can’t get past writing the date and title.
Diagnosed at 53. Bright kid, sailed through primary, did worse at secondary, passed my GCSEs against expectations, took A'levels and failed them, retook them and scraped through with very low grades, went to college, switched courses (twice), dropped out, worked for a while, went back to college, scraped through a modular degree, got the job of my dreams, pissed it away.
Thank you so much. Nobody ever sees the daydreamers as adhd, only hyperactive ones.
100% - I was never diagnosed as a child, my parents never even knew about ADHD. They thought everything was a result of lack of discipline. But having been diagnosed as an adult and looking back now I see clear signs. The only time I had straight As and Bs was when my mom would watch over me and make sure I did what I needed to do. During the times she was too busy my grades would slip. I did EVERYTHING las minute and I did it fast and well. The problem was I didn't need to work hard at anything to get As and be in the honor society. I had a 4.0 GPA in High School. And then I went away to college.... The first year was good, I had left over discipline and the fear of being on my own drove me to attend class and be good. By 2nd year the grades started to slip and the constant lure of NYC night life was too strong. By 3rd year I was late to every class, did the work the night before and actually skipped whole classes paying for credits I didn't earn. I later couldn't hold a job or an interest in any job for longer than 8 months. 8 months was like clock-work, a time to get bored and move on. Later marrying and having a child through my ADHD into overdrive. I became an anxious mess. I developed panic attacks and anxiety and would get overwhelmed by everything. Life was hard. Managing time was impossible. I finally got diagnosed by 3 different psychiatrists in my 30s! Today I take medication to be able to get anything done. Without it I just ruminate all day long. I also have a crippling fear of forgetting to pick up my daughter from school when I'm "into" my work. My hyperfocus on my art makes me afraid of missing important appointments, deadlines and every day tasks. It's not a lack of focus that cripples us, it's the hyper focus on one particular thing to the detriment of ourselves and loved ones. When we forget the world exists because we're so into whatever is occupying us in the moment. I must add that even when we manage to force our concentration on a boring task we will most likely miss so many details. If I have to read a boring passage I don't want to read I may throw in words that don't exist, omit words that do, see numbers backwards, or make up a meaning that's not there. My mind just plays tricks on me.
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@AR H wow, thank you for sharing that. The one thing that keeps flummoxing me on adult ADHD is the whole focus on “inattentive” - but I pay my bills and rarely miss appointments. What you describe is how it works for me, the constant fear that I will miss something and all hell will break loose as a result. If I relax it is a different matter. So I am hypervigilant, which makes me more anxious. Add to that the tendency to rely on adrenaline for focus (either manic hyperfocus which lasts a while, or the little bursts of adrenaline that I think I feed myself to try to focus when I can’t, and which feeds my irritability and frustration...though that could just be frustration from trying to focus)...and my lifelong predisposition toward anxiety, depression and fight or flight has really gone off the rails in old age. I can now longer work a lot of the time. None of this comes across to me when I hear people talking about inattentive. Maybe I (or we?) are in a serious minority, I don’t know. Looking toward a formal assessment, and DSM wise, I think I would end up presenting as hyperactive. I get what is said here about how adults, unlike kids, learn not to interrupt people and talk all the time, because it makes them socially unpopular...but that is the EXACT issue I have, and even being aware of it it’s the hardest thing for me to control. I think that’s impulsivity, and I think my impulsivity is driven by the adrenaline. So: somewhat less forgetful but more impulsive/hyperactive. And yes, when I am focusing I lose track of everything else.
Again, thank you so much. Even in ADHD circles my presentation makes me feel like I don’t fit in or match. So hearing from someone with similar issues is so reassuring.
i am still undiagnosed and probably will have test next week. i wanna virtually hug everyone here. The anxiety, the fears, because i have kids too that might be suffering from this. coz if id be diagnosed with this, first thing id say is what if i was diagnosed earlier, i couldve had a better life than now. and i wouldnt let my kids have the same life .
I got through school fine, college fine. The minute I threw running a household, being a parent and being self employed the cracks really appeared. Im a 39 year old woman now and some days I cope very well, other days the only thing I manage to do is the school pick up.
I am so envious of you! You managed to pass through university! I am having absolutely the worst time in my life...
yes, I feel you. I'm going to look into getting evaluated.
@@101thetruthguy Universoty really got to me. Ultimately I'm a dropout
36….struggled terribly with my masters after always excelling in school. I figured it was the stress-school, full time work, 2kids under 3 and a deployed husband. Had my last straw figuring “something was not right with me” and got evaluated. I can’t express how much made sense after diagnosis and the overwhelming feeling when I was validated. I cut myself some slack now and understand that I truly am a little different. 🤷🏻♀️
I feel this in my soul. I have read that it is often when women have children and have to manage more lives than their own that the symptoms really start to rear their ugly head. That was exactly my experience!!!
i've been diagnosed since i was a kid but every once in a while i need to watch a video like this to validate myself bc of how many people tell me that i'm "lazy" and treat me like total crap for not finishing all my cool projects. i need to get medication i think
I feel you
same, i had a friend who did this. they left since.
The symptoms that often persist into adulthood: Being overly talkative, a common expression of hyperactivity in females. Being overly emotional/struggling with emotional regulation - of course we get better than we were as children, but either the US or UK had a study that estimated about 50% of those sentenced to government mandated anger management were suffering from undiagnosed or untreated ADHD...
I was 43. It never occured to me before my son was diagnosed a few years prior. I had so many "Aha!" moments during the interviews and questionnaires in that time period.
Also, I learned to separate my symptoms and my hard-earned coping mechanisms.
"Do you often forget appointments?" Well, no - but that's because I have an iron-clad rule of NEVER leaving the room until I've entered our appointment in my electronic calendar with multiple reminders, or hanging up the phone before I've taken down ALL the details and/or entered them in my electronic calendar... you get the idea.
If possible, I'll do all bookings by email because then I have something written to go back and check when I forget stuff.
I don't lose my phone - because I ALWAYS wear clothes with pockets.
I don't lose my wallet - because it LIVES in my backpack that I bring EVERYWHERE, and if I ever have to take it out I IMMEDIATELY return it to its home - or else I'm guaranteed to lose it.
It took me DECADES of being late, not showing up, running around looking for essentials etc. before I came up with some fixes that work for me.
20 years was how long my sister refused to go to the movies with me because I always talked and blurted out funny quips or "spoilers" (i.e. I predicted what would happen next or what the plot twist was) before I learned to keep my mouth (mostly) shut for two hours.
And when I started stripping away complicated structures I had to live with to barely manage to keep my head above water, it was pretty obvious.
And two professionals, conducting two separate assessments, agreed with me.
When he said “if their a bright kid then they can just coast through primary school” OMG THAT WAS ME. My attention was horrible but my comprehension of everything was great and reading was something I was hyper fixated on as a kid so I did well in school even if I was daydreaming all day in class
i had trouble concentrating in primary school i always wanted to chat to the other kids but once school got hard enough i found it easier to concetrate. Also my school was very strict and we had our homework checked every day so that was very helpful with motivation because every day was "the last minute" you can finish your tasks uni was quite difficult as we would have a month before we had to submit assignments
"You can't do a dissertation in one night" - Sir, I'm going to have to correct you on that one.
Then I'd like to know what kind of dissertation you are working on. Cause it usually involves months of work or even years of work and is not something you can cobble together in one night.
@@bakirev Yeah, mine took 4 years, and I did it in about half the time of most of my classmates.
I procrastinated for badly that I had 8 assignments including my dissertation due in three weeks at the end of my degree. I didn't sleep for the final week and got a 2:1 including being two marks off a first for my dissertation. That was when I was studying as a single mum with 4 kids and still going to lectures at uni most days
@@gillb9222Oh my God, that’s amazing! What a fabulous example you are to your children.
I recently made an appointment to ask for an ADHD assessment and I've been making myself sick thinking I'm wasting everyone's time. This has been really reassuring. Funny that I felt the same way 7 years ago when I asked my college for a dyslexia assessment. My lecturer was sure I wasn't dyslexic, but put me forward for it when I insisted and sure enough I'm dyslexic.
Same here
You're NEVER wasting a Dr's time if you feel like you need help. Depending on where you live, you already have $$$ to worry about, if you're paying that (or if your Government is paying it) don't worry about "wasting" someone's time" for the help you need.
Hi Sharon, are you now being treated for ADHD and also Dyslexia? And how is that working out?
There is a tendency for people to have "Co-Morbidity" an overall term meaning that
people with one issue tend to have more than one. This can apply to Heart disease, and other Health issues,
as well as dyslexia and ADHD. Actually. More often than not!
Find out the whole story. It should make the puzzle fit so much better, and you will know how to
self-advocate for what you will need.
Answers solve riddles!
Sharon I know this is 12 months ago. I’m glad you went with your gut feeling, we know when something is really wrong, and we are struggling. I believe many people have diagnosed then selves. Then you need to follow up with trained medical people in that field, to have the diagnosis confirmed. I hope your doing well today. 😊
I actually cried at how insanely accurate this was for me, especially using stress to drive me to do things. I just wish I knew and was diagnosed in childhood.
I'm literally crying right now, I couldn't finish my dissertation and it's been a year and still haven't finish it yet. I thought I'm just lazy or unmotivated, and constantly blaming myself because I'm unable to finish it as fast as my others friends, after watch this video everything just make senses now.
If you can, find a good friend that will make you accountable to complete what you want that day.
A good friend is all well and good but you need diagnosis and treatment. Don’t delay, just do it and at the least you have ruled out adhd.
Same situation here. It's been 2 years and still I cannot finish my graduation project. I'm know I'm not just plain lazy because I've been trying so hard to finish it, but I just can't - - for now. Knowing that I have the time, knowledge & skills to get it done and yet I'm still failing, and I can't fathom why. So I'm thinking there must be a factor that is out of my control.
I deferred mine for 2 years. Diagnosed Bipolar/Borderline/Depressed nothing fit. Thank god this man described my life to me thus far. Can still save most of it.
Reading the comments and seeing the number of people who are having the light bulb moment makes me so sad as it is so under diagnosed and so hard to get diagnosed! It’s also made me happy to see that lightbulb moment go off! I was the same when at 40 something my son was diagnosed and I did my research in it and the same thing happened to me! I had struggled for years ! Finally went private and got diagnosed last year! So worth it! Good luck my fellow ADHDers ! Don’t give up on a diagnoses
It's currently wildly over-diagnosed. There are plenty of other conditions with the same set of symptoms that doesn't point to a "developmental disorder". Beware.
@@TheDavveponken generally the latest research points to underdiagnosis, not overdiagnosis. and while many disorders do result in similar symptoms (C-PTSD, FASD, and some cases of depression to name a few), researching into adhd isn't going to do someone harm. also... adhd is comorbid with most of those! so chances are that if someone has the disorders you're talking about, they ALSO have adhd.
also, adhd itself is a massive spectrum, with multiple genetic mutations (and thus technically different unnamed disorders) falling under the umbrella of adhd as we know it.
and adhd isn't strictly a developmental disorder. many researchers (and folks with adhd such as myself) don't even consider it to fit that category at all. in fact, generally its most notable symptom is executive dysfunction resulting from chemical imbalances. depending on the person, it might be better classified as a mental illness or a neurotype than a developmental disorder.
and finally? if someone discovers that the adhd diagnosis fits there life story (in a way powerful enough to make people cry. sincerely, please try to understand what it means to be disabled your entire life and finally discover there's a name for it. it may be easy for you to discourage people from seeking a diagnosis, but to those of us who have this disorder, it's a cruel rendition of what we've been told all our lives.) anyway, yeah, if someone finds a diagnosis, discovers how perfecty it describes them, and with it finds a community with similar struggles, resources that help them, et cetera... how is that a bad thing? why is the idea of a diagnosis so bad that we must warn people away from it in case they're wrong?
i challenge you to read this comment section. sit with these stories. try to understand the level of joy and relief and safety that a diagnosis like this can bring people, and understand that words like yours aren't protecting much of anything.
@@colorcollector147 "The latest research". And what is that? What is that research's stipulations? Who funded it? It's no secret that most research into adhd is done so in a positive light and funded by the medical companies themselves. The concept of adhd is fundamentally flawed as it isn't based on any proof. It's all an unproven hypothesis. For all I know the concept of adhd isn't much different from astrology: It's vague and all-encompassing in the way that it pretty much fits all who've ever have experienced adversity in life.
On the note "researching into adhd isn't going to do someone harm" I assume you mean for any individual with the goal of seeking a diagnosis? I can tell you I got the diagnosis adhd, I took the drugs and it very much caused me harm, even after I stopped taking them and even though I only took them for a week. For the last six months I've been suicidal, had issues with vasoconstriction, impaired cognition, erectile dysfunction and what seems like nerve damage from a dopamine flooded brain (neurotoxicity). There's very little research that look into adverse results due to use of methylphenidate (the most popular drug for treating adhd). The ones that did have found that it negatively affects growth, bone density, fertility and have adverse effects on childrens brains, not to mention many mentioning blunted emotions (becoming like a robot - like I did) and sexual dysfunctions. There's a ridiculously long comment section with people that have used stimulants or anti-depressants for treatment that lament their loss of self and sexual capabilities. Sadly I can't find the link, but don't fucking tell them or ME that the diagnosis doesn't do any harrm or that I should feel sympathetic towards those that now feel as if the problem with their entire existence has been answered - it hasn't. I'm here furious and filled with care, care that no one else should experience what I've experienced. And filled with rage that a profession aimed at helping people feel better lack the very ability to listen to how they feel and better greet them with the humanity and compassion that they deserve, rather than making a quick buck and getting rid of a patient (thus shortening the queue).
The point is that they're not disabled and that misdiagnosing their troubles as "adhd" doesn't get them the help they deserve -and THAT does them harm. The people around them are likely the problem, or the situation they find themselves in. Modern psychiatry is ridiculously ignorant to the social and emotional aspects of being human. I came in seeking help for what I believed (and still believe) to be borderline due to childhood trauma. And while I also literally described post traumatic stress reactions related to said trauma - I could not possible be traumatized, because trauma isn't subjective. I mean WTF? Instead I am meet with little interest in my actual causal history as to where I am today, but rather I am slapped with a label (adhd and asd) and said to take a drug that eradicates my capabilities of processing emotions (as I can't feel them anymore). And then they don't give a shit about the side effects I am experiencing ("never heard of that, that can't be real").
So fuck your challenge. I WAS one of these stories and they fucked me. They chemically castrated me sexually and spiritually. So sincerely and unapologetically fuck off. Your words are putting more in harms way.
"SSRI's have an antagonistic effect on ADHD"
Maybe this explains why all the SSRI's I've ever been on have absolutely *not* worked for me
Same! He described it perfectly well, I was still having trouble with concentration on them and eventually stopped taking them
I'm heavily suspecting I have ADHD and this convinced me to book a doctor's appointment. I was diagnosed with generalized anxiety disorder and secondary depression 5 years ago and prescribed sertraline, and although it helped so much with the anxiety my productivity was the absolute worst it had ever been. I wrote my Honours proposal in a weekend and probably got a total of 4 hours sleep. I handed in essays last minute, one a month late. My final project was rushed and my grade average. Hope we get the answers we need bud.
It treats the Anxiety and Depression but not the ADHD
@@andreasiwak2651 I've been on serialise over a decade now. Had cptsd come up big time because I successfully lodged a complaint about the causes. Sertraline helped with that to begin with but I'm stuck on it now. Trying to get anything done, especially anything involving the outside world, is impossible.
Thanks for your insight. Its prompting me to push for the help/treatment I really need.
Same, they always put weight on me and i refused to go on them anymore.
I always do better on a stimulant but doctor would refuse to give me anything like that and just order more blood tests
This gentleman is so... Therapeutic. The way he speaks, his body language, his flooding calmness. I'd love him to be my therapist and I'd trust anything he says. ahahaha Everything he said aligns with what I feel and I, more than ever, think I should get an assessment for ADHD. This was really helpful, I hope he has a lot of success in his life.
trippy_psyche1
They're on Instagram
.....
His flooding calmness while he charges probably $200 plus an hour. My ADHD would be calm also
Polite correction. He is *not* a therapist. He will not listen to you talk about your problems. He is a psychiatrist. He prescribes medications, can point you to resources to help you manage your symptoms and give you suggestions and tools to do that. A therapist is more often a psychologist. It's easy to confuse and conflate the two. : )
Isn't it wonderful to hear a physician actually really understand you from childhood into adulthood, and how you think, feel, and behave? It's a great feeling!
I’m left speechless after watching this video. Quite frankly, I had to rewind because I kept daydreaming in the middle of it, but to hear such an accurate diagnosis or list of symptoms that validates me- is incredible.
I went to my GP 10 years ago and told her I have ADHD after watching an eye opening video similar to this one. She basically told me I was mistaken as it was a child’s disorder as advised to go home. I’m 50 now and still undiagnosed. This video sums up my entire life. I’m just grateful to know again what is wrong with me. Thank you.
That's because you need to see a psychiatrist, preferably one that specialises in ADHD because a lot of GP's aren't fully aware of what ADHD is and they cant even prescribe any of the medications for it.
I don't understand why it isn't taken more seriously. I had a psychiatrist tell me that the reason I don't have ADHD is because coffee makes me feel jittery sometimes, whereas it is supposed to make people with ADHD feel more calm. Doesn't exactly sound like a proper test to me but alright I guess I'll just keep spending each day crawling from task to task
Yes, I'm 60, and about 10 yrs ago told doc about this. She said 'why do you want a diagnosis'. No one has ever believed me, in spite of the evidence
Yeah people who watch UA-cam videos and think there got conditions need a life
@@lukehanlon3814 4% of the population is quite high and perhaps people look for these vids because they know there is something wrong
He just summarized my 56 years of life. The fact I felt so proud of cramming my high school exam and acting it...studied a semesters worth the night before...remember being sweaty i was so scared....oh Lord, this is a Eureka moment and sad.
I'm on the verge of tears. The older I'm getting the harder it is to complete tasks and I feel that I'm disappearing in the legacy of my younger self. I get compared regularly. It's like losing yourself, a self that you created to appear strong and capable to the world. And now that I can no longer carry the weight I just feel so lost.
Look at neuroptimol neurofeedback it can help adhd as well as many other things too! Can also be rented and done at home 🏡
I was diagnosed with ADHD at 36 and put on Vyvanse. It was shocking to my current psychiatrist that I hadn't been diagnosed yet, as I was diagnosed and medicated for depression and anxiety disorders when I was 14.
At first it was extremely frightening to watch myself change, as I have always been very self aware and comfortable with who I was. I realized quickly that the person I was at that time couldn't exist on the medication and that made me feel very uncomfortable. Saying goodbye to that person was difficult for me. With that said, the change was phenomenal. It was quickly noticed by every single person in my life and the positive changes that came to my life, driven by my own healthy and conscious decisions and motivations for the very first time, were truly extraordinary and unexpected to me. Absolutely phenomenal.
I was diagnosed with anxiety and depression at 14 too. I'm 25 now and getting diagnosed for ADHD. 11 years too late.
@@TheCrippledGamer better late than never 👍
Simply put, medication made the change?
I'm so wary of medication.
@@TheCrippledGamer Hi! I was also diagnosed with anxiety and depression. This video described my school years up to now, age 54. Time blindness and procrastination are huge problems. Sleepy all the time, mind wanders. Anyway, I don't know how to get diagnosed because my longtime therapist and psychiatrist don't believe I have ADHD to the point they won't even discuss it. My psychiatrist says the med could worsen my anxiety or lead to bipolar mania. Doesn't even want to try a low dose. (My brother is bipolar with ADHD.) If you don't mind, what changes occurred after the med that frightened you?
If you don't mind, what changes frightened you after starting the med? My psychiatrist worries ADHD meds will worsen my anxiety or make me manic, so she won't even consider treating or diagnosing.
This guys has just told my life story. I'm on my 4th unfinished degree right now at 35. I also have the longest CV ever due to all the different jobs I've had. I'm a jack of all trades and master of non because I just cannot stick to anything long enough.
I have an appointment to get tested for ADHD and this video really helped me realize I'm the assessment is the right choice for me
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Aah jack of all trades! Master of none... indeed. Indeed!
30 years old here. Dropped out of college doing political science at 22, now doing chemical sciences. Highly doubt will finish this either. At least now I know why 🙄
Wow ...going to watch and listen again ...as I spent 13 mins nodding and saying ....yes ...to everything...I'm 53 years old and have put off my assessment for far too long ...it's time to get some help and follow through with something that has been affecting all parts of my life for far too long ...because i owe myself a better life
I actually started to cry when you talked about primary and secondary school. I'm not yet diagnosed with ADHD, but my secondary school experience was exactly like how you described and its gotten more and more difficult at university.
This whole video perfectly described what i struggled with throughout childhood and into adulthood.. i was always told as a kid that i was bright and very gifted but that didn’t translate into my academic performance. I underprepare, cannot focus in class, and would miss many homeworks, yet magically i still get standard and slightly above average scores because my exam scores makes it up. University was the toughest for me, especially when i had to write my thesis. It was one of my lowest point. It took me 3x more time to finish my thesis than my peers, and i was one of the student who graduated last on my batch. It makes me wonder if i would’ve turned out to be something better or greater if i had gotten help sooner.
I actually have a similar thing happened. when i was on my junior high school I rarely do my homework, zoning out, even worse i cannot remember a single math formulas on my first grade, i think i am just stupid but later on there's an IQ test and surprisingly my result got above average??
another example is, I never been in the top 10 but surprisingly again im on the 5th rank out of nowhere, and on the 3rd grade i suddenly find math fun?? and magically got a straight A for a whole year.
it's weird and fascinating as how different we could be without realizing it.
but same like you, in the university i reach my lowest point as well, i got anxious real bad i remember i got hyperventilating for a few days, have a multiple nocturnal panic attack, I even I thought i'll never finish my degree cus how bad i am doing my thesis, but I eventually gradute but got pretty late than my friends.
Never thought i have an adhd and how easy life can be if I'm diagnosed and treated early.
The "gifted kid part who struggled with university later on", you perfectly described what I'm goin through now, I'm 25 and recently got diagnosed with ADHD, but the shame of not bein competent enough and not understanding what happened, bein perfectionist, the constant anxiety, pressure and depression of being at uni, add to it the the constant fear of people knowing that you're not as competent as you seem on the outside, I really hope life is at least a bit better after you got diagnosed!
@@madleinebelesi5601 I hope you've found peace within your diagnosis. Not that you are broken or "less than" because you're not. Everything is built for the "regular" people so we have to adjust. Even if that makes them the "normal" that doesn't make us "less than" just different than. Yes, we have to adjust to them and their system...and it's harder than it should be. But there are things that you are VERY good at because of how this works in you and just how you are. Find those good things and focus on those.
Bro this is literally what happened to me. what do you take for adhd ?
Legitimately as he said he was going to keep it a short video because its a video for people with adhd. I had just gone and clicked on new tab to check my emails... think that answers my question.
I actually passed my uni all exams and courseworks doing all nighters. I haven't been diagnosed but proud of myself for getting it done.
"you may feel that you have always been a little different, you might be described as a 'daydreamer' or you might rely on stress to get things done." This summed up a major part of my life. Unfortunately, family and friends still regard me as some sort of a lesser being not wanting to make or put in better efforts into my life, when I have taken time and effort into gaining understanding and knowledge, and to create better ways for me to live daily.
As someone who was diagnosed with ADHD at 36, I look back at my life and want to weep at the description of a high-functioning ADHD adult. The term Dr. Humphries describes as "pancaking" in university completely illustrates my time in architecture school. Probably THE WORST major and career to choose with undiagnosed ADHD. While I maintained a high demand and overachieving schedule in academics and athletics in high school, by my sophomore year in college, it was like I was a completely different person. None of my familiar study habits worked, none of my "just work harder, longer" strategies supported me. Obviously, it crept into my career too. I'm glad now that I at least have help and don't feel alone knowing I wasn't crazy all that time and that there are others just like me.
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Same. I was always known as the overachiever all through grade school and by sophomore year in college I was depressed from all the stress of doing things last minute and losing the good student identity. I stayed in college for 6 years. By year 5 I was deeply considering dropping out.
Hello, I'm planning to get diagnosed anytime soon too, and I got determined to push it because you've taken architecture as well in your college days! I'm in my 4th year now and the focus mode in pressured situation really speaks up!
@@ppnovoir That's great! You don't have to push off your diagnosis because of school. You still may be able to get some assistance that won't interrupt your schedule. But whatever you choose, don't hesitate to ask questions or for help even if you don't know what help you need. Hope you have a wonderful year and God bless you in everything you do!
Haha. I had to laugh when you said "architecture school". I also studied architecture. Our department was known for constantly ridiculous deadlines and all-nighters, so I think it came natural to me. But, I struggled in some of the classes that required doing long research papers over months. If I couldn't knock it out in one night, or a weekend, then it wasn't happening.
I also did phenomenally well in primary school and high school. Was literally the top student in my school, and among the top in the country at both levels. At 42 now, I'm sure my life looks like a failure to anyone who knew me then. I was the "bright" kid, but everything since has been a challenge.
The thing he said about doing great in high school but failing in college...so spot on. I could never figure out how I lost interest...
Oh my gosh you just desdibed me. Did great academically up until the end of high school. Pancaked in college and was on academic probation twice but somehow managed to get my degree. Did my masters and it took me 3.5 years instead of 6 months to finish my dissertation/capstone.
I got testing 10 years ago on the computer but it said low chance of ADHD, and my psychiatrist suspected it was because of anxiety so that's what we've been treating since then. But I am finally getting reevaluated next week. At 35, I am so tired of living this way...no matter how much planning I do, I am either not meeting deadlines or putting things off until the last minute. Time blindness sucks. I always thought I just worked better under "pressure" aka waiting until near a deadline to do things...I can't make choices quickly. I can't focus in meetings without drifting away. I have 3 thoughts going on in my head all the time. But I can hyperfocus when I need to. I tried to do a project management certification and I could not do it. I don't know why I can't respond to emails at work right after I read it. I always have to wait, re read it...and then think about sending it...then forget about it. Ugh, I just wan to be able to think clearly and sit still and focus on a task at hand. 😢
6:58 and it takes years to complete something that should take
O N E Y E A R
i feel so called out but also makes me feel relieved that after 3 different universities and studying for over 9 years and still not having my Bachelors' degree, it makes sense now. also did well in primary school without needing to study and put much effort it.. high school started to be a bit more difficult and I was suddenly average student, university I am surprised I am still trying
This made me feel so much better, I thought I was insane. Glad I discovered this at 19 instead of waiting until I was 30. Also I can finally verbalise how I feel to my family now. Thankyou 😊
Yep. Im 34 and knew I had ADHD, but was told I didnt, I just need to apply myself and take things more seriously. Such a relief. I hope you find the help you need though!
@@bsovaleni274 Thankyou 😊
I turned 30 last year and I’m finally being assessed, always knew something about me was “off” but didn’t have a explanation for until 2 years ago. I thought ADHD was for kids. It’s definitely awesome you discovered this early, it affects so much of your life untreated.
I'm 30 and got bored and started making toast around 9th minute 🙄 This hits so close to home as I've changed 3 careers already, none which have anything to do with uni I quit...
63
He just described my whole academic career…
I honestly think that covid has saved my final year and masters because of open book online exams. This video is eye opening
It has saved me pharmacy degree for sure. I could feel my excitement of doing the degree dying by the day just before the pandemic, and if I hadn't been switched to online exams that year, I KNOW I would have totally pancaked that year. I'm now struggling wildly through my dissertation, just as mentioned, on my 3rd deferral. This has been such an eye opener for me.
I never went to uni because I knew I would not be able to hack it. Went to college twice and barely got a pass. I am not stupid I have been told my whole life I am intelligent just never believed it..
I'm 66.. you just told my story
Thank you... though it's heart breaking... my GP can't be bothered to help me out... we need help here in Canada
Glad to find you here....
The biggest thing for me is that I have a really hard time organizing my thoughts. Also, getting started on a project with a reasonable plan and following though is almost impossible.
Planning, Organisational Skills Time Management Goal Setting can’t do it all issues always have been. Slow Cognitive Thought Process until very late morning after lots of caffeine lack of motivation low boredom threshold distaste of micromanagement, emotional disregulation and RSD are huge
@@Dancestar1981 me too. This RSD 🤔 is ready Tripping me out.. I definitely feel that’s what I’m going through often, or all the time. Never could imagine being able to explain.
This is me in grad schoo
The fact that I had to watch this video at 2x speed to get through it should be a sign.
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Everything at 2X, except Joe Rogan at 3.5.
It's freaky how when he said that people with ADHD lose focus so I'll keep this video short, I lost focus... It felt like 10 seconds but I saw the video had run for over 2 minutes!
I loved class, hated homework. Terrible at tests. I second guess when I really knew the answer.
I get bored easily. Friendships are too much work. I prefer doing things by myself or with my partner only.
*spinning my pencil and fidgeting in my chair to maintain the baseline of stimulation required to sit through a ten minute video*
So many of us experience much of what he describes. I felt chills when he talked about procrastinating and relying on the adrenaline from stress to get things done in a burst.
What I want to emphasize is how disorders like ADHD can be masked so effectively over the years. Coping mechanisms and learned strategies to override behaviors and thought patterns really make a difference. They also muddy the waters when you're trying to figure out if and what your 'issue' is, if you suspect you're different in some way. I have never had treatment for ADHD and feel that led to me developing many coping mechanisms to hide certain 'repeat offender' traits. Things like procrastination and taking on projects and abandoning them are less of an issue for me today, not because I am any better underneath, but because I am so keenly aware of the threat of these problems. I'll catch myself getting interested in something and *stop* myself from going down the rabbit hole because I already know the dopamine will wear off and that I'll abandon the idea.
But there are big holes, because I haven't addressed the underlying issue. So the disorganization persists as a pattern, even if outwardly I am keeping up the 'high achiever' status ever since coasting through grade school. I am sure many of us experience this and feel imposter syndrome as a result. We'll have advanced degrees or run our own businesses (side note: many of us are entrepreneurs because we balk against traditional work environments), yet feel fundamentally unconfident in our abilities because "if you just saw my office" or "if you knew how chaotic my schedule looked" you'd realize I was barely holding things together.
Im 100% in need of treatment. Im 32 now and my life has been manic
26 different adresses
15+ different jobs
60+ girles
Drug addiction but 5+ years clean 💪🏼
Its time for a change
„everything is incomplete“...
You have me in tears.
I feel like you’re talking about my life!
Is there a solution to this mess?
No dysthymia, no selfmedication, no numbing all day, no anxiety, no fear of getting „caught“ every day?
Maybe this might be the answer to the question, why I‘m rather intelligent but don‘t seem to be able to manage the simplest tasks.
same
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Getting a diagnosis by a professional and a Adhd Medication prescription (for example Ritalin) in the right Dosis, physical exercise and cognitive behavioral therapy can help very well.
All the best!
I'm on medication for a week now- it's strange to go do the dishes, watch some TV, turn it off to do more chores - all with out the constant self nagging and internal guilt tripping and delaying until the very last moment. My kitchen has been clear of dishes for a week 😮
You just explained my 22 year old son to the T! It did not affect his school preformance till highschool,,he did no assignments, never studied,,gets 100 percent on tests and exams,,and took a zero on every project. Lost all his friends,,is one credit short of getting his grade 12 ,,tried online courses and they ran out,,he could not finish.
We live in Ontario Canada and we waited for over a year to get an appointment to have him assesed,,and two weeks before his appountment the doctor took leave, we are now at a loss how to help him,,I dont know how I can break it to him,,😢 he is already borderline depressed and feels useless. We need medical care and no one cares to help him.
This is the most accurate description of adult ADHD symptoms I have ever heard. I say this after treatment from several psychiatrists over the last 25 years since I was diagnosed. Dr. Humpries clearly knows his stuff.
Thank you , know its late in my life to be dealing with this. Iv been through the worst years as im now 82 with 6 marrages behind me, 3 yrs in prison and hundreds of jobs, but believe it or not I've done pretty well as I'm comfortable. The only problem I now have is there are things I need to do for people I love before I die, and they are the things I can't do, like taxes and wills and trying to get rid of stuff to have, and put my affairs in order. Those are the things I have never been able to do. I just hope I can get someone to help at my age. So thank you for helping to understand I need help as you made it quite clear that my problems are legit and im not just lazy minded.
Best of luck to you man! Never too late to improve the quality of your life
So did you do anything like take medication?
Your mind is beautiful! Best of luck getting the help you need.
I am 76 this year and discovered that a medication I took for arthritis over the past 8 years lifted up my enthusiasm and become more interested in doing things. It also increased my ability to persist in doing mundane day-to-day jobs that I would normally put off until the last minute.
Over this period of time what I put down to pain relief was actually an increase in my system of Dopamine. I discovered this bit of info when I realised in the past year that I had ADHD since being a child and while researching found out that increased levels of Dopamine helped people with ADHD. That's when I discovered that instead of getting supposedly drowsy from using Tramadol I was actually the complete opposite because Tramadol can raise Dopamine levels in some people to noticeable levels.
I would simply get some help to do those things asap.
If there is one thing I have realised, getting my personal affairs in order or just doing relativity easy or simple things... I cannot ever force myself to get that stuff done.
What makes it even more annoying is that I'm well above the average in terms of IQ/intellect.
I can _see_ that the things need to be done and I understand _how_ to do them.
But the procrastination... it's epic!
A really in-depth, comprehensive and enlightening talk on ADHD etc
7:00 : *one year*
ahaha this made me laugh I was watching it in 2x speed and it jump scared me
@@AT-357 😂😂same
Im crying the editing mwhahha
this is how we can tell all our brains are wired the same, we all noticed this exact bit ashdhsgghds
this gave me a good laugh because I noticed the same thing
Psychedelics definitely have potential to deal with mental health symptoms like anxiety and depression, I would like to try them again but it's just so hard to source out here
I’ve been researching on psychedelics and it’s benefits to individuals dealing with Anxiety, Depression, ADHD and from my findings, they really work and I’ve been eager to get some for a while but its been difficult to get my hands on them.
The Trips I've been having really helped me a lot. I’m now able to meditate and I finally feel in control of my emotions and my future and things that used to be mundane to me now seem incredible and full of nuance on top of that I'm way less driven by my ego and I have alot more empathy as well
I was having this constant, unbearable anxiety due to work stress. Not until I came across a very intelligent mycologist. He saved my life honestly
@@CarmenOrtiz440
I feel the same way too. I put too much on my plate and it definitely affects my stress and anxiety levels. I am also glad to be a part of this community.
@@Rogerseegren271Does he deliver to various locations?