Q+A: Your Most Asked Questions (red flags, dating, divorce timeline, leaving CA, living alone)
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- Опубліковано 15 тра 2024
- Thanks for asking these questions and bearing with me as I try my best to articulate my answers. I love you so very much.
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~How tall am I? 5'7
~Where am I from? Boerne, TX
~Where do I live? I spent 2016-2021 in Pasadena CA but have now moved to Austin, TX
~What did I study? Nutrition and Dietetics from ASU!
~How old am I? 24 (born in '97)
~Are you Christian? YES!
~What's your full name? Well it WAS Christiane Michel Janse but now it is Christiane Janse Smith so Michel is just a nickname now!
~How do you pronounce that? Like... Christy-Anne Mick-Elle Jan-See
~Do you have pets? YES! A rescue pupper named Max :-)
~Favorite Store? Everlane + Madewell
~Favorite Drink? Oat Milk Matcha or Lemonade Kombucha
~Favorite Friends? YOU
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I’m not sure why I am so anxious about this video going live - perhaps because I’m always wondering if I’m over or under sharing. My heart is to facilitate honest conversation to hopefully help someone else feel less alone in what they’re going through. Thank you for having grace when I’m not the most eloquent, respecting what I’m not yet ready to share + allowing me to process verbally as I come to new realizations. Though I’m eager to close this chapter soon, I’m thankful to be going through each phase w y’all by my side. Love you. 🖤
💗💗💗
😘😘😘
❤️❤️❤️
You’re amazing and your videos are my favorite to watch. I’m currently walking through a separation and working towards reconciliation but it’s hard and there’s so many parallels. I’ve listened to your podcasts with brook and my husband is also a 5 and I see so many similarities with my own husband. I just want you to know that you are so seen and loved and valued. Thank you for being so brave and open
I separated and divorced over thirty years ago. I can see the process I went through as you are going through it now. I do not have any regrets and I am thankful for the life moving forward.
Does anyone think that this divorce was the best thing that happened to her? I feel she is on her way to happier life and more successful career. Much love to you ❤️ I wish you all the love in the world.
Absolutely
Yes
Yes ❤
Agree 1000%
Amen!
Just came across your channel. UA-cam must know me well. I got married at 20 and divorced at 25, so very same story. I moved to Austin, lived alone for the first time, similar to you. I can say, now I'm 31 - happily married, trying for a family, and thriving. This is a significant chapter, but will be one you look back on fondly for how much you grow. Good luck in this journey!
@@LouieTzepher maybe for u
I know that discussing divorce and separation is hard for you but I do need to say that I appreciate you being so open to it because obviously many people are going through the same thing. You are building a community and an openness for your friends to come together during a difficult time for them and for you. You are creating a safe space
Timestamps:
3:06 How is my friendship with Kalyce?
4:05 How do you deal with your ex having been your world and now not even part of it?
5:15 Do you see a therapist and if so, what are your main takeaways?
6:25 What are your tips and tricks to meeting and making plans with new people?
7:18 Would you use dating apps again? Would you consider going on a date?
8:47 What has been the most healing thing you've done for yourself at this time?
9:49 Best way to support someone going through a breakuo/divorce?
10:45 Thoughts on kids?
11:18 How do you deal with betrayal?
12:01 Have your opinions on getting married young changed?
13:05 Will there come a time when you will share the reason for your divorce?
13:43 What do you miss most about CA?
14:13 How do you feel about having old content of you and your ex that people can pick apart? Why have you left your old podcast, etc... up?
17:05 Have you been in touch with your ex at all?
18:28 Is it still your goal to own or buy a house?
19:25 What has been your favorite resto in Austin?
19:55 Specific reason you thought you needed to move out of CA? Why TX?
20:58 Something you are looking forward to in a partner one day?
21:08 Red flags
21:33 Religion and thoughts on LGBTQ+
22:46 Why Austin and not Boerne?
23:22 Why haven't you filed for divorce yet?
23:55 How do you stay positive?
24:30 Are you scared about your anniversary date?
25:25 Do you and your ex want to reconcile?
25:58 Bee tattoo?
26:11 Piece of advice for Michel 5 yrs ago?
26:18 Tips on living alone?
26:40 Will you get back into podcasting?
27:07 How did you know it was the right decision to split?
28:21 Favorite merit product?
28:39 Do you recomment couple's thewrapy?
29:15 How do you feel about intimacy in a long-term relationship outside of marriage/post-divorce
Thanks!
My advice for the intimacy question is to not overthink it. Intimacy/sex etc. Is natural and beautiful. Don't let society or people around you determine how you feel about it. It's different for everyone. Wether it's waiting for marriage or having multiple partners just for the fun of it, that's all up to you, nobody else.
If you haven't heard "Tolerate It" by Taylor Swift you should give it a listen. It's sad and might make you cry but I feel like it reflects a lot of the things you've said about your marriage.
You're a lifestyle creator, it's only natural to post about what you're feeling or doing every day. We've all been loving your vlogs, so don't feel bad about the influx of content based on your divorce and move. Ii would be so strange for you to act like it didn't happen, when we are aware of it as the audience. Keep being you, keep doing what you're doing because I've seen dozens of lovely people sharing their stories and advice alongside your journey.
I can’t put into words how much I appreciate you, Ele. Thank you for always bringing such eloquent wisdom!🤍
@@MichelJanse I feel the same way, you brighten my day every time I watch your videos. Thank you, friend 💖😊
A thought that occurred to me while you were answering the last question: anyone who's ok dating a divorcee is also going to be fine knowing you've been intimate before. Even other Christians. It would be ludicrous for them to think you got married and then were never intimate. I don't think you have anything substantial to worry about on that front. And I was raised very much with purity culture and sex outside marriage is wrong. I never personally believed that, but most of the people around me did. And the reality for them, the ones who got divorced later, was that new dating partners later were kind about knowing they'd been divorced. I never personally saw or heard any of them having trouble with a new dating partner having issues with knowing they'd been intimate before.
Thank you for being so vulnerable ❤️ you are impacting so many more lives than you realize! We are all grateful for you!
This means so much. Thank you! I always get so anxious about sharing too much so thus truly means a lot to know 🤍
@@MichelJansehi my name is Mike Horton do you hate my name just asking
It's so empowering to hear a woman say that she's open to having children alone. Thank you for being such an inspiration to me and to this wonderful community that you've created!
For that day, you could change its meaning and do a yearly “Michel celebratory day” where you celebrate yourself and how much you’ve grown by doing everything that brings a smile to your face & a hug to your heart! However big or small the action may be. 🥰
I've adopted the phrase "season of life", it's really refreshing to refer to periods of time this way. Thank you for your vulnerability
Girl, I was so alone when I went through my divorce after 14 years of marriage. I didn’t have a support system, so watching your support system brings me great joy. I think it took me 2 years before I felt normal again. You are making great strides to take care of yourself.
I'm in your position. He had addiction problems and isn't working on them. Two years? I was hoping it would be less. I don't know if I have the energy to get through two years like this. Any tips?
I think on your wedding anniversary you should definitely do something really special for yourself. Even if it's just treating yourself to your favorite take-out. Also I'd love to see the video about the best & worst aspects of living alone! Don't ever feel bad about talking about what you're going through. It's the season you're in. People don't have to watch. ❤ You are incredibly brave for sharing & have done it very mindfully & with grace.
Michel, you have no idea how much your videos and vlogs bring me joy. Anytime you’re not posting, I’m going back and watching old vlogs! I’ve built such a connection to you although we don’t know one another. I want to send you love and hugs. Thank you for always being so open, honest and always so genuine. Love you so so much🥺❤️
AWE! Love and hugs right back at you, friend 🥺🤍
Thank you for being so real. Love yourself and always remember that you are doing great!
💜
Love you 💞 Glad that you are hanging in there and focusing on what bring you joy!
Loved this video! Your videos feel like a moment of peace and comfort. I watch every single one! Thank you for being so real and vulnerable 💗
Phewwwwww, thank you for answering the LGBTQIA+ community. I struggled in the Catholic school system being told I’d be going to hell since being a teen. I am a lover of your videos, as a queer woman experiencing divorce with my ex wife which was so hard for my teen and I, I felt really seen. Thank you.
I am so proud of you. Share as much as you feel comfortable you are helping so many.
Thanks for being so vulnerable and open. Praying for you❤❤
I love q&a’s and every one of your vlogs! You’re such an amazing and strong person ❤️
Yes!! Another MJ video. So glad I came across your channel. Your positivity is so contagious!! 🥰
I'm so proud of you. Thank you for being vulnerable and showing all sides of your life, I know it isn't easy for you. Sending hugs!
So much grace and maturity. Thanks for sharing with us and sending you so much love
Sending so many hugs to you!! Thank you for being so awesomely open at your own pace. So authentic and honest, and just incredible.
Here to support you lovely!! You are a role model for sure. So proud of your bravery and integrity.
You are amazing and being this vulnerable is hard to do. So proud of you💕
I so appreciate how open you were in this video. I am sure it was difficult but this is your story to tell and I am glad you are sharing it with us.
I appreciate you being so vulnerable and open.
You are amazingly open in this Q&A. It's hard to make yourself this vulnerable, and I appreciate the strength you continue to show us in both your vlogs and this. 💜
I just love your energy, you’re glowing
Thank you for your genuineness, good energy and openness. You’re helping so many people and it’s healing to listen to you truly. Life has beautiful things in store for you I know it.
I appreciate your honesty and showing how important it is to really know yourself! ❣️❣️ I love you so much and your heart! ❣️❣️
Thank you for sharing your life with us and wanting to help others. Love you and wish nothing but the best for you and your family! Prayers for healing are being sent your way!
You did a great job answering all of these tough questions. You're so well spoken. Stay strong!
You're so strong, Michel 🙌🏼🧡 I send you all the love from here
Thank you for doing this Q&A, I can tell how hard a lot of these questions were to answer and just want to say you are awesome ❤ Love ya friend
What a wonderful video! I’m so sorry you’ve had to go through this but, I hope that you continue to find what makes YOU happy and content. Thank you for opening up ( when you didn’t have to) and Sharing this incredibly difficult journey with us. 😘
Thanks Michel...you did great answering these questions with eloquence and grace. *hugs to you and Max* 💖
I’m so impressed by how you are handling this situation. Through this, I have learned a better way of handling hurt than I have done in the past. Thank you. I’m praying for you. 💕
You have grown so much since your first videos! It’s amazing to see!!
Sending you massive hugs! Thank you for the honesty xx
So much love for you Michel! ❤️❤️ thank you for being so open and talk about it! It helps me so much! I learned so mucho from you already in this journey of yours! Thank you thank you! 🤗🤗
You are such a truly beautiful soul 🤍 thank you for continuing to be here and for being vulnerable
Loooveee the amount of content you’ve been blessing us with! 😍 Also love your honesty and vulnerability. Thank you for being so real and opened with us, Michel! You truly inspire me to be a better person every day. ❤️
You killed the Q&A!!! I am proud of you, you own your feelings good and bad. I love that. Keep being you!! Love you girl!! 😘😘
I appreciate so much how candid and honest you are with what you feel comfortable sharing. I feel that this awesome group of online friends you’ve created is so caring that you could share as much as you want to and we wouldn’t think its oversharing. We so appreciate you!!
Family and friends along with your UA-cam family will always be here for you ❤️
Found you through this video, and I just want to say I’m so excited to see your journey. Grow through all the feelings, and remember to be kind to yourself. 💛
I love you and thank you for being real and I don't think you are over sharing this is a process and this is helping you heal and I think you are doing great
You did great answering those questions, your doing great of how far you have come 💕
You’re helping me work through my own hard experience. Thank you 🙏🏻
Since you started sharing more of your personal life you have become my favourite UA-cam!
You are such a good person!❤️ You deserve the best!
He did a wonderful job answering the questions and you were very well spoken and everything made lots of sense❤️❤️
Thank you for your vulnerability & honesty. It is refreshing to hear you talk about what you’ve learned, what you want (& don’t want), & what you deserve. Truthfully, it continuously gives me courage to make some difficult decisions that I have put off for too long. I’m more than twice your age, but I learn so much from you! So, thank you! 😘
You are stronger than you think and I hope you are proud of yourself. 💜
As a fellow daughter of the utmost high🙌🏼, I love & agree wholeheartedly how you answered the LGBTQ question. Christ orders us to love others as he loves us & to treat others w/kindness. I wake up daily & try my best to do that. Your channel has been such a blessing to me😊TY & much love 💕💋
You are being very authentic in the way you are sharing, we can tell it’s difficult but I hope you find it helps you to process it by talking to us. You are stronger than you realise 😌
Sending you love and light. Thank you for sharing your heart with us! Love you always ❤️
I just wanted to let you know that your content and personal reflections are really helpful from the perspective of someone approaching marriage as well. Your insightfulness about such a tough situation is both inspiring and informational. I'm happy that you're finding ways to move forward and enjoy your twenties. I pray for you regularly and hope you're doing okay today!
You are so real, and thank you for the vlog. As you go through this, remember that what you may think is a set back can be the biggest set up. Sending love your way ❤️
I can see how confident and sure of yourself you've become through these videos. We appreciate everything that you feel comfortable to share 💛
I am proud of you. I see the pain but you are moving forward
thank you for welcoming us into your life with vulnerability and honesty. I watch every single one of your videos now and they really make me feel less alone on the lonely days. I'm going through a pretty big life change myself, and I hope the best for both us in 2022.
Thank you, Michel, for your authenticity. I don’t at all get tired of hearing the wisdom you share through this process in your life. It’s honest and encouraging, so thank you. God bless you♥️♥️
I don't watch many you tubers..I love your honesty & grace no matter how it makes you feel. Thank you for sharing. Praying for you.
Your videos brighten my day so much! I also just want you to know I have already seen so much growth in you over the past few months and it doesn’t go unnoticed! I’m proud of you!❤️
Im so proud that you set boundaries for yourself. You deserve love darling 🥰
I LOVE the idea of a podcast with your parents!! They give the best advice.
You are so strong! I admire you so much! Sending love ❤️
I gotta say, I'm new here but the level of maturity I see in you is immensely! Praying for you in this season of life.
Yes to the podcast to the parents!!!!!! ❤️
I did hear some red flags listening to your podcast here and there where there was no support. I hope that you stay safe, find happiness in yourself, and continue to be vulnerable because that is such a strength that is overlooked ❤️🙏🏼
I’m all for podcast with the parents!!!! They are so inspiring and what more rewarding to get all these lovely talks, and inspiration from youre family.
Thank you for sharing your life and thoughts. I vote YES for a podcast with your parents!!!
You’ve done such a good job dealing with how your life has changed. Thank you for being so honest and open about your whole process. I can’t relate to what you are going through but I’m studying for the CFP exam and my stress level and anxiety are extreme. I love watching your videos, they give me some sort of peace and calmness that is nice during this time in my life. Thank you soooo much!!
You are so much better off now! You deserve happiness and love.
Michel, You are truly an inspiration to women of all ages. Thank you so much. ❤️
You are such an amazing human Michel. You have so much love and kindness within you that is evident even in such a hard time like this. I wish I had anything to say that would help bring you strength. I am praying for you.
You are so brave.
I was in your place several years ago. I see your light and positivity shining through all this, and know you will one day look back and know you are stronger for having this experience. Sending you my prayers and blessings as you learn new things from here forward. Im so glad you have Max to keep you smiling!
I love your hair! Your beautiful smile shines out more!
Thank you for your honesty. Prayers for you.
You are lovely. You will heal completely and have so much joy and a brand new exciting life.
I’m very happy you will spend 2/2 with us even if the day comes and you change your mind that’s okay too. We are here to support you in whatever way we can. ❤️
You make in difference in the lives of so many people and I always look forward to your videos. Although you are going through a rough season in your life, you seem genuinely happy about this new chapter in Texas. It's so nice to hear that you are focusing on yourself, your happiness and dividing up your time doing the things you like and spending time with the people you love. You deserve all the good things in life, surrounded by happiness and love! Thank you for being brave and sharing your story. We love you, Michel!
Aww thank you so much for sharing what your comfortable. Your definitely encouraging others in the same boat.
You are changing for the better. You’re becoming an even more beautiful individual, you can’t see it yet but keep going this is making you a batter person. 💕
I'm so proud of you and how far you've come since this all happened. Your honesty is refreshing but also that you're allowing yourself to heal and giving yourself Grace when sharing these incredibly personal things. Thank you for being vulnerable with us!
As far as 2/2, I think that's a great day to celebrate you! Do something you love, spoil yourself a little. Maybe a night at a fancy hotel downtown somewhere where you can do a food tour!
February 2nd should be the ultimate self-care day with all your favorites! I would love to watch/join in on a self-care day with you. 💕
I love your honesty. You seem very genuine. 🥰🥰
I feel so honored that you felt safe sharing more of what is on your heart and mind. Still praying for your sweet lady. You are so strong and so brave. And such a light in our world. Sending you tons of love this week.
Good Q&A. I’ve only been following for a short time. You are a wise mature woman with a solid foundation. Keep moving forward. Life has so much for you. But right now is a time for you to nurture and feed your soul 🌸
Great job. Thanks for sharing. It has brought up past bad memories, but that’s okay. I wish this would have been around back when I was going through what I thought was the end of my life. Today, I am so grateful that I finally got out but it was lonely as no one was talking about things as such. You are so awesome.
💛 Bigs hugs Michel!! I know this Q&A must’ve been hard for you to answer some questions, but you handled it with Grace. Continuing to pray for you during this season. God Bless you!
Hi Michel! I am a fairly new subscriber to your channel and I want to tell you that I LOVE your videos! I really admire you for the way you are putting yourself out there online about your real life struggles and joys. And I also admire how joyous you are and self aware. I think you are truly doing such an amazing job navigating this season of life. I know you might not feel like you're doing a great job, it's evident that you are looking at everything so clear minded and you are doing the very best you could possibly do!! Sending love your way Michel!!! ❤️
Thank you for being so vulnerable and honest! I know there are so many people watching your videos who are going through the same hardships and I am sure your videos are so helpful to them! You mentioned that you love to listen to music while you are alone - what kind of music do you listen to?
Awh Michel, wish I could give you a giant hug. Prayers for your continuing healing. Also I have a few dear friends that live in Austin, it is a fun city. I hope you really enjoy your time there in this season of your life ❤️