What To Do If You Think You're Going To Get Fired

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  • Опубліковано 25 гру 2024

КОМЕНТАРІ • 188

  • @ROTTERtube
    @ROTTERtube 11 місяців тому +16

    #3 is if your manager is a micromanager and you can't do anything right. IT'S THEM NOT YOU!

    • @TheOculusInstitute
      @TheOculusInstitute  11 місяців тому +2

      That’s the perception from their part that you can’t perform the tasks, but it gets to my point in the beginning that often the job isn’t worth staying at

    • @saraf9081
      @saraf9081 8 місяців тому

      Good point

  • @RealMexFoodShouldntGiveUDrrhea
    @RealMexFoodShouldntGiveUDrrhea 10 місяців тому +11

    I feel like I’m good at my job but I don’t fit in. All my my coworkers are bubbly and chatty and I’m the quiet one. I noticed this a few weeks ago and I’ve tried to talk to people to change this but I end up getting one word responses. I think it’s too late for me to build a good relationship with with my coworkers and my supervisor and manager have noticed. I just got a concerning email today so I’m on UA-cam searching everything I can about not getting fired. This was useful

  • @DovidGershom
    @DovidGershom Рік тому +21

    Yeah, that last one is 100% accurate. Toxic workplaces. Toxic managers. Getting sick of it.

    • @themetalhead1463
      @themetalhead1463 Рік тому

      Yep, it seems like 20-30 years ago, places weren’t so toxic.

    • @BillClinton228
      @BillClinton228 6 місяців тому

      I worked long hours to try and impress the boss, sometimes I even worked Sundays to learn the job quicker. Didn't matter, I was fired after 2 months and never given a reason.
      No matter what you do, if the boss doesnt like you you will be kicked out.

  • @sour3000
    @sour3000 2 роки тому +31

    5:16 is so true. Deep down we don't want the job so we do things to sabotage us from staying. It's like you want to quit but you don't quite have it in you to suddenly end it!Until you've secured a job somewhere else at least😂

    • @macgamer1973
      @macgamer1973 Рік тому +4

      Not always the employee it’s the employer. FedEx trying be like Amazon/ Walmart treating employees like crap

  • @EMT_Rick
    @EMT_Rick Рік тому +12

    I've been fired over a dozen times and I've also fired other people probably the same amount of times and this is by far the most insightful video I've found in on this subject👍🏿👍🏿!!

  • @bmoshareholderappleshareho855
    @bmoshareholderappleshareho855 2 роки тому +23

    What I discovered is HR is not a Police Department. They are just workers like everybody else. If there is a conflict between two workers, they are going to do what’s right for the company, not the victim. They usually get rid of the victim, especially if he or she is in the lower hierarchy of the company. Also, if you are being harassed and nobody is doing anything to help you, what you have to do is continue to work there until you find more suitable employment. That’s what the unemployment commission told me.

    • @TheOculusInstitute
      @TheOculusInstitute  2 роки тому +7

      I'd certainly agree that HR is not a police department and will ultimately act in the interest of the company. Some companies recognize that long term facilitating a good culture is what's best, while others do not.
      I would agree that hierarchy often does tilt the scales in terms of burden of proof.
      However, I vehemently disagree that the appropriate response is to stay in a situation where you're being harassed. The unemployment commission has a vested interest to keep people employed so they pay out less. If there truly is personal a financial reason to stay until more suitable employment is found, then taking action on that should be priority #1, and it won't be too hard to find a better option than one that is so hostile.

    • @italianstallion9170
      @italianstallion9170 Рік тому +5

      that's why you need to be in some sort of union. I had same problem in 2019. i was flavour of the month with all staff until i was being forced out of the place, they started to treat me like I had the plague. luckily my union got me a whole load of money and i walk into a new job before my official leaving date.

    • @newtuber4freedom43
      @newtuber4freedom43 Місяць тому

      HR is not your friend - ever

  • @luisriba8082
    @luisriba8082 5 місяців тому +1

    I got laid off after taking disability for 5 months. I had a surgery in my right knee and two days after got back got the call that I was terminated. I am definitely suing them.

  • @sheree2985
    @sheree2985 Рік тому +7

    I was fired by the managers lying on me and saying I was ignoring customers. It was bizarre because I was mainly the person that had been taking customers, as other workers had their head down, or completely purposely ignored guests. However I still increased my attention to customers. If I was handling something else, I would make sure to let them know I would be with them in a second. All while, others continued to ignore customers and push them off on me. I finally got fed up and had a talk with the managers about what was going on. I was fired about a week later for "ignoring customers. Right after I was fired, I mean literally 2 minutes later as I was still in the building, I went to HR to complain and have it on record. Even if my complaint was too late for me, it might help someone else down the road who the managers decide to target due to favoritism. Because of my complaint though, I was able to get unemployment even though I was fired in an at will state. I realize the mistake I made was not bringing up my complaints to both HR and management far earlier. This would have made it harder for them to build a fake case.

    • @TheOculusInstitute
      @TheOculusInstitute  Рік тому

      Per the first part of the video, doesn’t sound like a place you’d want to work

    • @newtuber4freedom43
      @newtuber4freedom43 Місяць тому

      HR can still lie, delete things, make stuff go away. Always when making a complaint, do it in an email an cc/bcc your personal email. That way a lawyer can use it for your benefit.

  • @smrk2452
    @smrk2452 8 місяців тому +12

    Don’t leave anything behind in the office. Bring everything home.

    • @earlofsandwich7884
      @earlofsandwich7884 5 місяців тому

      I shooke the store managers hand, wrote a thank you note to the staff and remembered I forgot my steel bottle. I drank from it this morning. As you do.

  • @clint120
    @clint120 Рік тому +13

    Depends on the company, but most firings are about who likes who.

    • @TheOculusInstitute
      @TheOculusInstitute  Рік тому

      What’s your evidence for that statement? Especially with regards to affinity that is unrelated to other factors (clearly someone who is incompetent and lazy will be disliked)?

    • @BillClinton228
      @BillClinton228 6 місяців тому +1

      He presumes if you just talk to your boss like a human being he will appreciate it... no, not at all. Some bosses just wont like you and wont care what you do or dont do... just get out and find a place that appreciates you.

    • @newtuber4freedom43
      @newtuber4freedom43 Місяць тому

      @clint120 :: i have witnessed much behavior like that - you can do the job if 2.5 people and it's never enough. If you are liked, you can be lazy and get away with it.

  • @Peaceful02024
    @Peaceful02024 Рік тому +3

    Wow this was borderline therapeutic. Very insightful 🙌. Great content!

  • @kayumochi
    @kayumochi Рік тому +9

    I am a man who has been fired three times. Twice I knew it was coming. The first time I was replaced with a woman who the boss thought was sexy - he simply wanted a female to ogle. A highly valued employee who had just left the company let me know what was coming my way and why. The advanced notice gave me time to erase my laptop and make preparations. My female replacement ended up sleeping with a client on a business trip and the client's entire company found out so the shit hit the fan and she was fired. So laf. The second time I was planning to quit and had already cleared my office of anything I might want but before I could give notice my boss fired me via email. Oh well, In all three cases, I simply did not like my position. It all worked out!

  • @moonshynegirl172
    @moonshynegirl172 3 роки тому +13

    I just found out today they're training someone for my position and no one will tell me why. Blind sided because I thought I got along with everyone.

    • @TheOculusInstitute
      @TheOculusInstitute  3 роки тому

      Do you really want to save the job? Are you happy there?

    • @gusyao8407
      @gusyao8407 2 роки тому +3

      Is ur work load more than enough for two persons, if not, brace urself, the day that trainee can do it smoothly, u r out the door, start not to leave any thing useful to ur successor, there's no such thing as being professional in firing workers, much less about the welfare of the person being fired.

    • @DovidGershom
      @DovidGershom Рік тому +3

      Probably a quality issue. Watch out though, a lot of employers will NOT tell you of all the duties that they need you to perform. Many employers will also release you if they need to hit a racial qouta.

  • @MsPerthgirl1
    @MsPerthgirl1 5 місяців тому

    Document everything - every conversation and every email, and if you know you’re going in with HR, take a support person - another set of ears who are on your side. This made the difference of being bullied out vs being compensated out for me.

    • @TheOculusInstitute
      @TheOculusInstitute  5 місяців тому

      If the premise is that one is leaving, then yes, all good advice
      Wouldn’t want to stay in that type of job

  • @pamelabentancor6112
    @pamelabentancor6112 4 роки тому +24

    What if it’s a combination of both? Your boss not liking you and being a new employee making honest mistakes and being put down for them? I love the company my work and our culture but my boss is so condescending and I would just hate to miss out on an amazing opportunity like the one I was given.

    • @TheOculusInstitute
      @TheOculusInstitute  4 роки тому +3

      Pamela Bentancor
      I would say that if any of it is you, then go through this process. If your boss doesn’t change after you do so, that tells you a lot.

    • @themetalhead1463
      @themetalhead1463 Рік тому +1

      I’m in the same boat. I’m new and my boss won’t give me any slack for that despite working harder than others.

    • @charzanboo9940
      @charzanboo9940 11 місяців тому

      @themetalhead1463 What happened? What did you do?

  • @evanshlom9767
    @evanshlom9767 3 роки тому +7

    My computer and internet have been breaking down for two months now and I feel it’s a push from the universe for me to part ways from my job. It’s most weeks that I lose hours of time to a random technological inconvenience, and then all my projects go to shit

    • @TheOculusInstitute
      @TheOculusInstitute  3 роки тому +1

      That's certainly unusual. Aside from tech problems, do you enjoy what you do for work?

    • @evanshlom9767
      @evanshlom9767 3 роки тому

      @@TheOculusInstitute I’m watching your video lol. But my job gives me great opportunities to break into a higher skill job that I’ve been practicing on the side.
      Finally, now I am finding opportunities to really apply a more difficult and frankly fun skill and it will double my salary if I get more experience this way then find a new role or a new company

    • @TheOculusInstitute
      @TheOculusInstitute  3 роки тому

      @@evanshlom9767
      Well, the video is about whether you think you're going to get fired rather than whether you enjoy what you do.
      It's pretty important to answer that question with yourself directly, as well as to ask whether you will enjoy that other more profitable options you are looking at.

  • @kayeb5953
    @kayeb5953 3 роки тому +28

    How about being in customer service and taking over 100 calls a day, yet the only calls QA monitors are “bad”. I only have mild improvements. My boss doesn’t like me😒

    • @TheOculusInstitute
      @TheOculusInstitute  3 роки тому +4

      The advice in here applies pretty well, especially the part about asking yourself whether you even want to stay

    • @mrtwister9002
      @mrtwister9002 3 роки тому +3

      That's a call center for you. It's not just you that experiences that. They motivate by fear. Make your metrics! Can anyone find happiness in slavery.

    • @watchinvidzwatchinvidz7691
      @watchinvidzwatchinvidz7691 Рік тому +1

      Call centers are toxic.

  • @DerekTComedy
    @DerekTComedy 3 роки тому +7

    What if you're not a good fit but somehow can only get work in the particular field and can't afford to lose it or go to school for something else?

    • @TheOculusInstitute
      @TheOculusInstitute  3 роки тому

      I've not heard of a case where someone "can only get work in the particular field." There are many fields that do not require going back to school and provide decent income, as well as other bridge strategies.

    • @stheno4783
      @stheno4783 Рік тому +1

      @@TheOculusInstitutelike what?

    • @TheOculusInstitute
      @TheOculusInstitute  Рік тому

      ⁠@@stheno4783
      Depends on prior experience and current income level. Could you provide those and other relevant details?

  • @FrankBevins-kh7mq
    @FrankBevins-kh7mq 5 місяців тому +1

    Usually people just dislike you if your doing a good job. They see you as competition and will do anything to get you removed.

    • @TheOculusInstitute
      @TheOculusInstitute  5 місяців тому

      No, that is generally not how things work because environments that operate that way rapidly go out of business.
      If you are in such an environment, then what I said at the beginning about it not being a fit applies.
      I'd recommend you watch this video: ua-cam.com/video/gZcTgQCgG5A/v-deo.html

    • @FrankBevins-kh7mq
      @FrankBevins-kh7mq 5 місяців тому

      @@TheOculusInstitute I have only been fired one time. This is what happened but thanks the recommendation

    • @TheOculusInstitute
      @TheOculusInstitute  5 місяців тому

      @@FrankBevins-kh7mq
      I’m not saying it’s impossible. However, I hear such stories far more often than would be plausible for all of them to occur.
      Given the tendency of the egoic mind writes narratives to avoid personal responsibility, the vastly most probable conclusion is that most people misread what actually happened

    • @FrankBevins-kh7mq
      @FrankBevins-kh7mq 5 місяців тому

      @@TheOculusInstitute I’m not saying owners do this just co workers or shift managers can get jealous. From my experience.

    • @FrankBevins-kh7mq
      @FrankBevins-kh7mq 5 місяців тому

      Then they will lie to owners to make you look bad

  • @Corina-dq2my
    @Corina-dq2my 2 місяці тому

    Communication right away. If you sense something isn't as good with your performance as you would like then address it right away and don't be afraid. Speak up until you understand that assignment. I had a manager who was really rude to people and acted REALLY annoyed when her workers asked questions or brought anything to her attention. It got to the point where they were afraid to anymore. So, don't allow that to stop you. You can't become great at something without experience and a little training but don't wait. Be polite but assertive.

    • @TheOculusInstitute
      @TheOculusInstitute  2 місяці тому

      Completely agree! And if a manager is hostile to communication, worth considering that first question in the video

  • @imperialyoshi8624
    @imperialyoshi8624 Рік тому +3

    I’m not afraid it of it I just want to get out these bs

    • @TheOculusInstitute
      @TheOculusInstitute  Рік тому

      How many other jobs have you applied to?

    • @imperialyoshi8624
      @imperialyoshi8624 Рік тому

      @@TheOculusInstitute oh I applied to to many I had to get out of many jobs from manger and people problems because of their jealosy

    • @imperialyoshi8624
      @imperialyoshi8624 Рік тому

      I used to work 5 jobs

    • @imperialyoshi8624
      @imperialyoshi8624 Рік тому

      @@TheOculusInstitute but now I’m a seller I got to start somewhere

    • @imperialyoshi8624
      @imperialyoshi8624 Рік тому

      I see no future to jobs

  • @maxgamerov
    @maxgamerov Рік тому +2

    what if I need to keep the job...but I just dont like working 😢😢

    • @TheOculusInstitute
      @TheOculusInstitute  Рік тому

      Need to keep that specific job or need to have some job?
      Don’t like working there or don’t like working at all?

  • @twinsweare2
    @twinsweare2 2 роки тому +3

    When you come from poverty "finding" a career path when you have bills due today is difficult.

    • @TheOculusInstitute
      @TheOculusInstitute  2 роки тому +3

      It doesn't have to be. I know many people who come from extreme poverty and have become extremely successful doing things they love.
      What IS difficult to the point of being nearly impossible is making a jump from both poverty and unfulfillment straight to an amazing prosperous career. That's why it almost always must be done in steps.
      Think of two components. One is financial success and the other is enjoyment/fulfillment. Every career step must advance one without hurting the other. Either one gets better and the other stays the same or both get better.
      Eventually, after much progress, you may need guidance from an expert to help get a wonderful endpoint. But by that point, the foundation of healthy income and enough destress to the point of being able to do great inner work.

  • @feefee8627
    @feefee8627 3 роки тому +5

    What about micromanaging seems like I'm the only one getting did like this nobody else isn't. Should I just quit or transfer😡😡😡😡😡😡😡

    • @TheOculusInstitute
      @TheOculusInstitute  3 роки тому +2

      Not enough information for me to answer definitively… but here’s how I’d think about it:
      1. How bad is the micromanaging affecting you?
      2. Other than the micromanaging, how do you feel about the work?
      3. Would a transfer change the situation? Or is it part of company culture?
      4. What other options are available if you quit?

  • @italianstallion9170
    @italianstallion9170 Рік тому +3

    Unless you are caught getting both the wife and daughter of your boss simultaneously up the duff, it's always better to leave rather than be fired.

  • @onecoolcat2478
    @onecoolcat2478 3 роки тому +3

    What if I don't know what the problem is? No one ever communicates

  • @newtuber4freedom43
    @newtuber4freedom43 Місяць тому

    Managers do not like me because i do not socialize much - and when i do, the underdogs socialize with me (i suppose i am one) - i have ASD/ADD and do not require lots of socializing, but i am also not deaf in hearing the way they treat others as opposed to the way they treat me with negative demeaning tones and picking things out of the blue to complain about - we all human and make small errors, but mine seem to be over exaggerated while someone else who is NT making the same error, gets a happy pep talk. I always own up to my errors and do what i can to rectify them. But being on the spectrum requires me to need a lot of detail and the managers know this (i communicated my needs) purposely be as vague as possible or speak to me / yell at me / email me / leave me notes as if i were a child - very unprofessional.

  • @gefleigh4264
    @gefleigh4264 3 роки тому +4

    Ive often seen a worker set up in the (they dont get along with co workers)because your a lone wolf and dont want to become involved with shop floor drama ,or they are they're afraid of you intellect ,? and you have been around,!! and the company knows ,you know, your being shafted.!

    • @TheOculusInstitute
      @TheOculusInstitute  3 роки тому

      I've never seen someone fired because of their intellect. Instead, managers try to work out how to use that intellect to their advantage. What I HAVE seen is people getting fired for poor interpersonal skills and failure to build relationships.
      Likewise, I've never seen someone fired for being a lone wolf. I've seen people fired for being standoffish, unfriendly, rude, or other interpersonal issues. I've seen people better at building relationships skip over more talented people for promotion. But those are different things.
      Whenever there's a "set up," there's almost always something else going on beneath the surface. It doesn't mean the explicitly given reason is a valid one, but it does, almost without fail, signal that the person being fired did something wrong (normally in the way they treated other people).
      It's important to take responsibility for such interpersonal interactions because doing so is the only way to stop it from happening again.

  • @theknittingelephant928
    @theknittingelephant928 6 місяців тому

    I really Love my job and the people I work with. Bit end of last year they had a huge incident and lost a ton of money. Now they are looking to cut costs and just announced that they are out sourcing part of my job to "help with the work load" with people in the Filipinas.... and like 2/3 of my work load was resigned today....
    I am low man on the pole in my department and I am just super worried.....

    • @TheOculusInstitute
      @TheOculusInstitute  6 місяців тому

      When businesses are cash crunched, that generally results in situations that deteriorate and become better to leave
      I’ve had many clients in that position

  • @SharlenesJourney
    @SharlenesJourney 3 роки тому +3

    I’m going through my mental health isn’t not in the best shape. Since covid hit I have not been the same. I had a creator a really bad error on a persons account. I emailed my manager today but he hasn’t responded. I feel horrible but I know this job just isn’t for me it’s a very stressful office job

    • @TheOculusInstitute
      @TheOculusInstitute  3 роки тому

      It's good to know that a job isn't right for you.
      On the other hand, whether a job is "stressful" or not is dependent on one's internal alignment, and if you're at the point where your mental health is not in good shape, you definitely want to work on the internal issues that have led to that (as opposed to merely avoiding external triggers). Therapy and such can definitely help; I also have several book recommendations if you like.

  • @anastasiav626
    @anastasiav626 6 місяців тому

    I being almost being fired because I didn't sleep with one of my bosses/coworkers who blatantly said that he would make my life hell if I don't. Because I got along with others I being promoted to this guy level. But he really delivered and accused me of stealing. His girlfriend who worked alongside me started taking money from the safe. I was about to get fired, but there was one caveat. I quit 1 months prior I being accused of money constantly missing and had access to nothing. I quit because this guy did deliver on making my life hell and turn management against me. There was nothing wrong with me as a person and I was extra likable this is why he wanted piece of me. So when above advise is applicable to most situations there are exceptions.

    • @TheOculusInstitute
      @TheOculusInstitute  6 місяців тому

      That’s why I say in the very beginning that if you’re afraid of losing your job it’s probably not the right fit anyway most of the time

  • @rebeccacampos4058
    @rebeccacampos4058 4 роки тому +7

    Thank you, you have put things I've felt and dealt with into a different perspective. For myself, I enjoy what I do and the people i help along the way however, the people i work with seem to have a personality I cannot relate with. Ive tried different methods to communicate and connect with my coworkers but I feel pushed aside or irrelevant to what they socialize about or feel like an inconvenience for asking questions as I'm still training. My question for you is, is there a way to amend this problem that has effected my work load and my mental health since its been happening for over a month?

    • @seansessel3644
      @seansessel3644 4 роки тому +2

      Rebecca Campos
      Interesting question. A couple notes:
      1. Why do you feel pushed aside or irrelevant? Are there specific actions that are happening?
      2. Definitely don’t feel like an inconvenience for seeking to learn. Any company that dismisses people trying to learn is a problematic environment.
      3. Exactly what personality differences are there between you and your colleagues?

    • @rebeccacampos4058
      @rebeccacampos4058 4 роки тому +1

      @@seansessel3644 1. Something that specifically triggers me to feel that way is definitely when my boss and coworker would have conversations about what they messaged or sent each other via text the night prior. Which can vary to hardships, their personal love life/family life or the drama they have going on between friends/family, typically things I would keep private. However, if I were to break the ice and talk about a new restaurant or something that happened in the news they would give me that "oh thats nice" response and continue a conversation among themselves or become ghostly silent .
      2. I was recently in a meeting with my boss, and they felt disconnected that I seek help among my coworker and not them. I learned in previous jobs that you go through your coworkers for help first and if they can't figure it out talk to the boss about it. I let them know that it was by no means a sign disrespect but more of a respect to the chain of command, which is something they no longer want me to do and instead go through them directly since its not my coworker's job.
      3. And this is my personal opinion, I'm a positive person who wants to make an meaningful impact for what I'm currently doing. I firmly believe that negative can be a huge drain of energy but my sense of humor can be on the dark side since I grew up in a troubled childhood. From my perspective, I see that my coworker stems from a negative stand point of life, there seems to always be an issue with their significant other, best friends, or can be harshly judgement of a client all in front of our boss while kissing up to our boss. As for my boss, they seem like a nice and genuine person, but I sense that they like hearing and being involved in the drama of others as well as judging the parties that started it. And having that feeling that their over generosity is a favor which comes with a price.
      I really hope I'm wrong and this is just something I'm overly worried or thinking about. And I understand that everyone is different but if there is advice you can give me to better myself and my way of thinking I would deeply appreciate it.

    • @seansessel3644
      @seansessel3644 4 роки тому +1

      Rebecca Campos
      A few notes:
      1. That’s normal behavior for people who have known each other for some time. Don’t try to force friendship yet when you’re new; let it develop naturally. Start by taking an interest in them and their conversation rather than trying to interject something else.
      2. Again, normal for you to go to the boss first rather than the coworker. I wouldn’t worry about that.
      3. Most human beings are a blend of negative and positive, and I’ve met many people who try to focus on only the positive. It creates a gap with the average person. It’s totally ok to let people express whatever they have to express without identifying with it. Whether you get drained by negativity is not about whether you’re around it but whether you let yourself absorb it.
      Hope this helps

    • @evanshlom9767
      @evanshlom9767 3 роки тому

      How’d it go?

  • @Handleitt1
    @Handleitt1 3 роки тому +3

    My boss emailed me during my shift to go into the office for an in person meeting with two other Office Managers. Am I being fired? I still have 2 hrs left on my shift and I’m boiling in anxiety. I just started working on my attitude this week so idk what it’s is.

    • @TheOculusInstitute
      @TheOculusInstitute  3 роки тому +2

      Unfortunately, there's no way for me to answer that question. Main thing for you is to ground yourself regardless.
      Also, is this a job that you really want to keep?

    • @Handleitt1
      @Handleitt1 3 роки тому

      @@TheOculusInstitute My sister said it might me a promotion 😂 I can only hope. I do want to keep it since it’s so beneficial but I know the type of job I really want is needing to wait until after I get a degree.

    • @TheOculusInstitute
      @TheOculusInstitute  3 роки тому +2

      @@Handleitt1
      Hopefully it's the promotion! Regardless, it's always best to maintain your calm.
      What's the job you really want?

    • @terminative
      @terminative 2 роки тому

      So what ended up happening?

    • @Handleitt1
      @Handleitt1 2 роки тому

      It turned out to be a “learning opportunity” that I worked out and since then I’ve been promoted with a raise. It’s tedious boring work & I rather create various forms of art and sell online and be a traveling merchant. Stability is the reason I stay.

  • @johnrainsman6650
    @johnrainsman6650 Рік тому +1

    Well, when I suspected I was going to get fired, I decided to risk what was potentially going to happen any way, by teaching my boss a lesson on why condescension is wrong. She once questioned me for putting black linens on the tables for the wedding reception instead of white, the correct/usual color (but in my defense, we usually put on black linens for *any* event, and I don't even generally set the reception linens). Oh, and she was upset I had signed up for a one-person shift. I'll admit, I am much better with a helping hand and guide, but come on, that's no excuse for being insensitive. One of our student leader's responsibilities is organizing who works which shifts on the schedule, and my boss scolded him for not noticing I had signed up for a one-person shift. When she asked him if she thought I could do the shift, I answered for him with a firm "yes," because I felt belittled by her. She said she didn't think so, was all "I've told you not to sign up for shifts by yourself, I've been very clear about that, I don't know how much clearer I can get for you to listen" (something like, that, so I'm not perfectly quoting her), and she told me I need someone there to give me instructions and guide me. I regretfully didn't stand up for myself because I was too intimidated
    But feeling resentfully brave and determined _this_ time, I decided to do what she did to me back to her. My college's disability services was hosting a program to educate and prepare high schoolers in Special Ed, who were considering enrolling here. We caterers were serving the food, and every time I saw my boss talking to a high schooler, I would immediately go over there and either *a.* tell my boss she's needed somewhere or there's been a situation, or *b,* offer _my_ help to the kid. My boss eventually concluded that I was deliberately trying to keep her away from the Special Ed students, and she insisted I tell her what was going on. I acted like I had no choice and "admitted" I was trying to prevent her from potentially saying anything offensive to the learning-disabled kids. I acted like I was trying to protect them because I wasn't sure she would be 100% respectful; that I worried she might question them if they make any honest mistakes (well, honest to disabled learners, not the general population), even if unintentionally. When she expressed her offense at such a judgmental, faithless perspective, I basically said, "I'm sorry, I wasn't trying to hurt your feelings. I was just trying to keep their feelings from getting hurt, just to be on the safe side. I mean, having a learning disability is tough, especially when others don't understand it and make the disabled feel less. They get condescended very easily, and I didn't want them to feel that way."
    Do you see what I'm saying? Why I did what I did? What I was trying to say to my boss, without sounding obnoxious and passive-aggressive?

    • @TheOculusInstitute
      @TheOculusInstitute  Рік тому

      And what has all of this accomplished for you? Is it worth all the stress and energy and rumination you’ve put into it?

    • @johnrainsman6650
      @johnrainsman6650 Рік тому

      @@TheOculusInstitute It is if it educated my boss on why condescension is wrong. She belittled me, I belittled her. Fought prejudice with prejudice.

    • @TheOculusInstitute
      @TheOculusInstitute  Рік тому

      @@johnrainsman6650
      Did she give any reason to suggest she internalized the message? And why would you want to continue working there?

    • @johnrainsman6650
      @johnrainsman6650 Рік тому

      @@TheOculusInstitute She expressed her hurt that I could have such little faith in her and how she would speak to learning-disabled students. That I would accuse her of having and expressing ableism. So I said, very slowly and "awkwardly" (to look tactful, not passive-aggressive), "Well, it's just...a big part of my perspective comes...from what you said to me about working that coffee service. You said you didn't think I could manage by myself, and that's a very...classic point of view, when it comes to people with learning disabilities. Society always labels them and their abilities, just because their brains work differently. Neurotypicals don't dig deep enough to understand them. I have a learning disability, so I know how these folks feel, and that's why...I wanted to protect their pride. I mean, if you could say what you said to me about doing that shift... [I showed my teeth to give an awkward look and said hastily] "I don't know what you might say to other disabled learners. I just wanted to spare their feelings. Otherwise, I would never forgive myself, for not doing what I could to protect them." She looked at me, as if processing but not understanding (like, as opposed to an _understanding_ person). Then she got a call and had to take it in her office, and I punched out as soon as my shift ended. That was the last moment I saw her.
      And to answer your question, I never quit the job because it's quite advantageous: picking my shifts, getting free coffee and meals, and down time in the break room when we can't bother the guests during their meetings or speeches. My boss is the ONLY reason I would ever want to be away from the job

    • @TheOculusInstitute
      @TheOculusInstitute  Рік тому

      @@johnrainsman6650
      Doesn’t sound like your intervention (or the stress you’ve been torturing yourself with) has had any positive impact on her comprehension or behavior

  • @johnpierce2095
    @johnpierce2095 3 роки тому +3

    how about a boss, that when i was in his office last week, he brough up something that happend over 2 months ago, im like if i did something really wrong why not bring it up the week of not 2 months later, so to me thats suspicous. gave me a final warning,

    • @TheOculusInstitute
      @TheOculusInstitute  3 роки тому +3

      If you don’t think you’re boss is acting appropriately, then that gets to the point about considering whether you actually want to keep this job

    • @johnpierce2095
      @johnpierce2095 3 роки тому +1

      @@TheOculusInstitute im hanging on long as i can, im at the point of im 48 and not sure what i would do if i lose this job, i dont wanna just take some job i dont like again, and money will be tight till i do find somethibng

    • @TheOculusInstitute
      @TheOculusInstitute  3 роки тому

      @@johnpierce2095
      How many other jobs have you applied to?

    • @johnpierce2095
      @johnpierce2095 3 роки тому

      @@TheOculusInstitute none, cause im still at my current job. why i said im hanging on here as long as i can.

    • @TheOculusInstitute
      @TheOculusInstitute  3 роки тому +1

      @@johnpierce2095
      I highly advise people start the job search BEFORE they leave or are fired.

  • @tinjadog
    @tinjadog 8 місяців тому

    I was almost fired once for something that was completely outside of my control. I decided to quit instead. A couple of years later the owner of the company was convicted of tax fraud and ended up in prison. I thank my lucky stars I got out of there when I did!!

    • @TheOculusInstitute
      @TheOculusInstitute  8 місяців тому +2

      I had a client whose boss pressured her to cook the books and thankfully she took my advice to get out ASAP
      Some people are crazy and best to not be around that!

  • @katebueno191
    @katebueno191 10 місяців тому

    I said i was leaving and i need it my court date and time to get people out of my phone over the initial set of false accusations made against me by people claiming not to be in my phone !!

    • @TheOculusInstitute
      @TheOculusInstitute  10 місяців тому

      Are you saying your bosses or colleagues have hacked your private phone and are monitoring it?

  • @debjarrett6573
    @debjarrett6573 Рік тому +1

    I saw my job posted on Indeed yesterday. What should i do

  • @jenniferliggett6385
    @jenniferliggett6385 6 місяців тому

    There is no such thing as fighting it when they simply don't like you and want you out. They will inflate small errors everyone on the team makes and paint you as incompetent. They will go looking for anything they can use, and usually can find it, because we are human. Unfortunately, unless your cousin is an award-winning attorney who will represent you for free as the company drags it out for years and hangs the threat of firing over anyone who could vouch for your behalf, you have very little hope of winning any lawsuit. Corporations almost always have the deeper pockets.

    • @TheOculusInstitute
      @TheOculusInstitute  6 місяців тому

      If that’s the situation, then it falls into the category I described initially about it not being a fit.
      The other methods I describe are not about it being a “fight” but rather a cooperative process
      If it’s a bad faith environment, better to leave as initially stated

  • @nelsonkalula7343
    @nelsonkalula7343 3 роки тому +3

    I had quite a bit on my plate. I work in Digital Marketing so I dab in all of the services. I dont know I I guess I just got overwhelmed with work and couldn't get this report out properly and my boss is not too impressed. I really need this job as obviously you know...global situation and all. Dont even get me started on what makes me happy because I have no clue.
    I am thinking of having a chat with her. This is also not my first mishap recently as well.

    • @TheOculusInstitute
      @TheOculusInstitute  3 роки тому

      I'm sorry to hear all of that. The recommendations in this video will help you with that process.
      That said, I would be open to the possibility that you CAN get a new job. I have a client who literally just got his new offer yesterday.

  • @Gabriel-xq6tn
    @Gabriel-xq6tn Місяць тому

    In America not here in South Africa. Here in Africa everyone educated deserves a right of a job.

    • @TheOculusInstitute
      @TheOculusInstitute  Місяць тому

      What? Why would “deserving” differ across countries?
      PS my father is actually from South Africa

  • @katebueno191
    @katebueno191 10 місяців тому

    Tgats all i said and then i said i5 wasnt about the people at my job is the fact my information was stolen. Then i said i dont appreciate people talking behind my back when they were not there to see what happened. So they cant tell me m the entire store cant be in my phone over sonething that was a false accusation !!

  • @dave7701
    @dave7701 3 роки тому

    Many come down to wrongful termination. Which is illegal. Keep records and record if you can when you boss sends you to his office. Try not to make it noticeable. One word could be a lawsuit

    • @TheOculusInstitute
      @TheOculusInstitute  3 роки тому

      Wrongful termination depends very much on where you live. For example, Texas is an “at will” employment state - there is no wrongful termination except for federally protected categories like race.
      Furthermore, if one is at the point where one even suspects something like that is going on, it’s time to quit anyway. Why would anyone want to stay in such an environment?

    • @dave7701
      @dave7701 3 роки тому +1

      @@TheOculusInstitute Every state has wrongful termination especially if it comes down to race.

    • @TheOculusInstitute
      @TheOculusInstitute  3 роки тому +1

      @@dave7701
      Hence why I specifically mentioned that exception: “except for federally protected categories like race.”
      Again, moreover, the important thing is not to focus on a lawsuit but rather on finding a job where one doesn’t have that level of drama and conflict.

  • @jaaguitar
    @jaaguitar 10 місяців тому +1

    Yeah, just give HR the documentation they need to fire you 🙄

  • @Gabriel-xq6tn
    @Gabriel-xq6tn Місяць тому

    In South Africa we don't depend on boss feelings. You fire me, I take you to court. It's better I lose in court with honor.

    • @TheOculusInstitute
      @TheOculusInstitute  Місяць тому

      That might be related to why jobs in South Africa are so hard to come by

    • @Gabriel-xq6tn
      @Gabriel-xq6tn Місяць тому

      @TheOculusInstitute we agreed with capitalism but we're more humanist. No one is perfect.

  • @katebueno191
    @katebueno191 10 місяців тому

    Like when i said i dont want campbell near me and you send campbell look alojes tp my store knowing. I font want this nan near me. And at least fir 3 years i said this man is dead to me. In my life he is dead. So i dont know what ti tell you !!! I dont want gim near me !!!

  • @watchinvidzwatchinvidz7691
    @watchinvidzwatchinvidz7691 Рік тому

    I don't like that others have jurisdiction over me. Especially when they are not a good worker & want me to do there job & others jobs as well. Plus I'm not fake & don't want to act like I like them bc let's be honest nobody really likes anyone bc we are just thrown together to work. There is a layer of fear of losing your job if you don't kiss butt. I'm nice & they are not so there's that. Yeah & leaving is not a option bc the next job is going to the same or worse bc people are toxic everywhere. It's not natural to work. It's literal slavery bc we never make more than just enough or not even that to live so..

  • @gusyao8407
    @gusyao8407 2 роки тому

    Most of the time it's either u or ur boss is getting fire, u don't know it u, ur boss choose to be u, he knows it's coming be fire u, he will save himself from his boss, blame u for everything without u knowing.

    • @TheOculusInstitute
      @TheOculusInstitute  2 роки тому

      It's interesting that you make the comment "most of the time"
      What's your source for this? My observation has been that this phenomenon is certainly in the minority, and if it does happen, that's certainly somewhere that you don't want to be working at

    • @gusyao8407
      @gusyao8407 2 роки тому

      @@TheOculusInstitute u focus is on ppl getting fired is most of time at fault, my is the opposite.

    • @TheOculusInstitute
      @TheOculusInstitute  2 роки тому

      @@gusyao8407
      First, let me repeat my question about what your source was for the claim that most times people get fired it's their boss or them. I'm not sure where you got that from.
      Second, I never said anything was anyone's fault. I find blame to be a useless construct. In fact, I spent the entire first part of the video specifying that most of the time you may not even want to work there because of other reasons. It was only IF people were still committed to the job that they should follow the steps above.

    • @gusyao8407
      @gusyao8407 2 роки тому

      Involve in highly technical job, source is first hand experience happen to my peers, his boss blame him for the mistaken he made, he did as his boss want it, my boss told me that, and I did fix it for them, but still his boss got him fired to cover himself, happen to the second guy too, I didn't involve their this time. project cost around 3 millions that's 1991. that boss was gone including the second guy he blamed. Saw the same in another outfitted, too. most boss will blamed his men for their own mistake. most boss of boss r in the dark, didn't know who is the real one. Much more the ppl working in human resources, talkers at in an advantage than doers, do u agree?

    • @TheOculusInstitute
      @TheOculusInstitute  2 роки тому

      @@gusyao8407
      Depends heavily on the environment. I've seen companies where it happens (and if it happens once, it happens a lot, until that boss himself is removed, which normally happens eventually unless there's nepotism). There are also many environments where it's completely absent (having coached thousands of people in a wide variety of environments).
      I wouldn't generalize from 2 companies.

  • @RichardAndewSwayne
    @RichardAndewSwayne 3 роки тому +4

    What if you can't get a better job. What if you are unskilled fool who can only work minimum wage jobs?

    • @TheOculusInstitute
      @TheOculusInstitute  3 роки тому +6

      I’d start by not referring to oneself as “an unskilled fool.” Psycholinguistics matter.
      Secondly I’d note that there are many jobs that pay above minimum wage without specialized skills. Often the lower levels of the career ladder can be climbed through sheer reliability and good attitude.
      Third, if someone can’t get a better paying job, at least get a comparable paying job with a better environment.
      Fourth, develop a valuable skill set for the future

    • @swamparse-dp7mg
      @swamparse-dp7mg 10 місяців тому +2

      Not a fool, just time wasted, get a skill it only takes 6 months to 2 years.

  • @coreyanderson7424
    @coreyanderson7424 2 роки тому

    That isn't true at all, that if someone is concerned about being fired that it means he's not a good fit or vice versa.

    • @TheOculusInstitute
      @TheOculusInstitute  2 роки тому +1

      I said often, not always. That said, when would it still be a good fit?

  • @giovannigiorgio5040
    @giovannigiorgio5040 3 роки тому +3

    Neo liberalis capitalism you are value less than a food processor, labor law close to slaves

    • @TheOculusInstitute
      @TheOculusInstitute  3 роки тому +3

      Not necessarily true. If you add significant value, you are not interchangeable. When we take the burden on ourselves to build our skills and expand our impact, we can take control of our own destinies

  • @levth01sct
    @levth01sct 11 місяців тому

    Simple, prepare your resume, and find another job.

  • @kill3rclown690
    @kill3rclown690 Рік тому

    what if ur critically injured u cant walk properly and u worry about getting fired cuz u like ur job?

    • @TheOculusInstitute
      @TheOculusInstitute  Рік тому

      Is walking a specific way required to perform at the job? I’m not sure I understand the link here

    • @kill3rclown690
      @kill3rclown690 Рік тому

      @@TheOculusInstitute yes it requires a lot of walking u never ever sit down.

    • @TheOculusInstitute
      @TheOculusInstitute  Рік тому

      @@kill3rclown690
      So then this sounds like something that may fall into the ability to perform the work category, and I’m not sure how remediable it is because I don’t know your personal medical situation.
      I will say that I was once hit while walking by van making an illegal left turn and woke up 41 feet away. I was told I’d never walk right again, but I ended up making a full recovery with no surgery. So I’d certainly explore all options there.
      Another option is to raise your concern with your boss, let them know that you love your job, and see what accommodations can be made.
      I’d also note that per the ADA (a federal regulation), employers cannot fire people due to disabilities unless that disability has a material business impact, and they must make reasonable accommodations to allow work to occur without said impact.