Ranking Elden Ring Bosses By How Well I Think They Play Chess
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- Опубліковано 28 жов 2024
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Loretta would totally checkmate you in like, three moves. They both require smart use of resource management, the ability to read your opponent, the understanding of your circumstances and how you can use them to your advantage even when backed into a corner… They’re pretty much the same game when you think about it.
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Hey rusty I'm first
@@ernestdrake1433 I think rusty is first
Hey rusty how about next time you rank the castles ?
you still have 4 games worth of fashion to go through and if your this bored look up remnant : from the ashes and code vain
Malenia is blind.
oh my, this would make a chaotic tournament
Think you need to get BandaiNamco involved in a sponsored tournament
Don’t get any ideas
MAKE THE BOTS!
The chess chads themselves have appeared.
Dear lord
I really like to imagine the scenario of the tarnished just casually strolling up to elden beast or something and, instead of drawing their weapon to fight, they just slap down a chess table and two chairs, one of which is comically large to accommodate their opponent.
I just imagined that and I absolutely love it so thank you 🥺♥️
I can remarkably vividly picture Elden Beast bending down to ponder a move.
Like Geralt in the witcher 3: "care for a round of gwent" after th person who he plays with had their whole family murdered.
HHAHAAHAHA MY GOD HAHAHA... i just imagined this and i cant stop laughing, fucking elden beast slapping the table going "Lets Play"
@@achillesreyskens2774 NPC: "Please Witcher! Save my poor son who was taken by a beast! You must hurry, I'll pay you as much as you want as long as you bring my dear son back to me alive!"
Geralt: "Fine... Gwent?"
NPC: "Sure!"
Rennala: comes to the table with three kids and obviously sleep deprived, to the point that it's the children who are actually playing against you. However, as soon as you check her king, she wakes up, takes control of the situation and you realize she's actually really good.
Erdtree sentinel: the first few time you play him, he instantly wipes the floor with you thanks to his encyclopedic knowledge of openings, but when you play him again after having learned a bit you realize he has the tactical genius of a gerbil and uses memory as a crutch
Dragon Lord Placidusax: despite being an accomplished Grand Master, he doesn't play chess competitively anymore. You'll have to visit him at his home in an abandoned mountain town to play him
Dragonlord placidusax nice, slow, you think have a shot... then he drops the fucking hammer and suddenly you've been checkmated so hard that your head explodes into a cloud of rapidly expanding plasma
Agreed absolutely! 😂
Accurate on all accounts!
That's not the Erdtree Sentinel! That's me!
Ah, nothing beats placidusax,s tea making skills which he will offer you once your seated
The entire part for Loretta would make the funniest scene ever. I personally imagined her bursting through the door on her horse and immediately checkmating you on the first turn she actually plays
You’re three games in. You already beat Godrick, Mogh and Ranni (although you have a suspicion she gave you that win just so she could watch the other matches with Miquella). Right now, Loretta is glowing with an ethereal light, in full armor save her helmet, horse sitting down to let her play her pieces.
“My, it’s been a long time since I’ve been cornered.”
Her voice is hollow. You heard good things about her from Miquella when you were invited, but so far she’s played only slightly better than Godrick. You could probably win in…like, nine moves?
Then, she dissipates.
The doors slam open, and Loretta is there, in a wheelchair, absolutely soaked and lacking any armor, wearing simple commoner garbs. She catches a glimpse of the Carian Loretta before looking to you.
“Sorry I’m late, my horse got sick in Liurnia…”
She plays the Hand of God and you surrender in three moves. Loretta spends the rest of the tournament either practicing with Malenia or kicking everyone’s ass.
loretta is the kind of player who promotes to a knight even tho it makes no strategic sense.
This is the true way to rank bosses
Indeed. Wait till he does the Checkers edition.
The only and most accurate way
Godfrey when playing chess:
“Let us have a good game tarnished warrior”
* you manage to put him in checkmate *
*“I’ve given thee courtesy enough”*
* suplexes the table *
Chessbox match, but after you give him a checkmate just a box match.
Godfrey would be the kind of guy to yell really loudly in frustration when he loses before shaking his opponent's hand respectfully and storming out. You may spot him beating a tree outside if you stand near the windows.
Chess-WWE where if you beat Godfrey in chess Hourah Loux sits up and beats you to death with his steel chair
@@thosebloodybadgers8499 And then some random lion walks up to him and talks him down, before they both walk home
@@sierraandrews9921 then he shows up later covered in lions blood for part 2
Mogh would probably be like the Blood Priest only that he can actually pull the intimidation off. Whenever you make a move, he would chuckle with his raspy voice and after a while it gets to you.
Mogh is like BP except he's actually good at the game.
Just stall untill the authorities show up and arrest him
@@mohammad1.45 what do you mean?
Nothin’ illegal going on here officer…
Mohg is the role model Edgar was trying to replicate but failing miserably.
If someone chuckled every time I moved, I'd lose in like 5 turns from anxiety alone.
unironically a genius and creative idea that I've never seen before. now make that damn bush list already.
Malenia plays by checker rules whenever she uses her queen; pick it up, tap around the board a couple times, and pick up like 4 of your opponent’s pieces while they’re asking what just happened
Malenia plays shogi (puts slain pieces back on board as her's)
@@turtleslw1279now that is cold. She would absolutely do that.
But instead of explaining she'll just inform you that she is manlenia blade of miquella
“Google en waterfowl dance”
@@anthonyharriel5685 and she has never known defeat, because she cheats
Rusty just wrote a elden ring fanfic with his headcanon of how the bosses would behave in chess AU
Damn he really never runs out of ideas 🗿
excited for ranks of consumables, site of graces locatiins, poses, types of torrent jumps (single, double). I'm sure there are many more
@@TheJols Single Jump: A tier. Double Jump: S tier. The glitch where you try to jump after falling off a cliff and nothing happens: F tier
I consider this video running out of ideas....
*Chess with Ranni:*
You show up to the game only to realise there had been something in your coffee that morning which wasn't supplied by the usual commissionaire because he had something in his coffee the previous morning and didn't notice because he'd been to a free entrance party someone mysterious had set up the previous night. Anyway, you're thinking about the pompous-sounding old man who served you coffee when you're absolutely unable to move and can't do a single thing in the game and run out of time against your serenely smiling opponent who absolutely isn't hiding another set of arms under the table.
Turns out you were playing chess but your opponent wanted to play 4th-dimension-hypercube-vostrayan-roulette-strip-poker.
Is that a TTS reference? Dang I miss the series already.
Immediately rekindled my interest when we got to ‘strip poker’
@@gabfloro3609 Let's see: It was a Death Note, TTS, Columbo and possibly Discworld reference.
This is just a children's card game!
If the Lands Between had a Text-To-Speech device. Alfabusa let's go
Rennala: She just sits on a chair while her creepy daughters play poorly until you manage two or three checks, and then Ranni comes up and forces you to play a match against an algorithm based of Rennala's glory days, as one of the best players to ever live.
And then AI Rennala summons Anatoly Karpov to destroy you while she stares at the moon
AI Rennala plays extremely aggressively, taking a lot of risks that could very easily checkmate you, but playing defensively is a good way to stifle her.
Not a take I ever expected to see. Hmm. Now you've got me thinking about others.
Mohg's strategy revolves around kidnapping a family member and telling you he's sure you can see things his way.
Godfrey, first elden lord, plays nice and nearly wins in the first half, then once you get his queen he slams you into the table
@@georgekatkus5162 I imagine it as you take the Queen and suddenly wake up in hospital several months later having blocked out the memory of being planted into the ground head first.
Black Knife Ringleader Alecto is relying on the arsenic she slipped into your water before the match started, so she’s just waiting on the clock.
I kinda want to see Rodan either using his gravity magic to move normal pieces, or you have to play with peices the size of a 5 year old so he can pick them up to play. Might have been easier to say would just call out moves like battle ship with his soldiers.
“Jerren, pawn to H3!”
rodan
The masterlist:
Bosses with no intelligence: Fire Giant, modern dragons (Ezykes, Agheel, etc), Tree Spirits, Erdtree Avatars, Misbegotten, Red Wolf, etc
Godrick: Watches UA-cam tutorials constantly. He’s actually got a decent memory, but no creativity when a strategy goes south. His choice is usually paying Margit a loan to take over the match, or do something entirely random which just makes his Queen more vulnerable.
Red Wolf of Radagon (included because it can learn magic): Okay, who let the dog in?
Really though, Red Wolf is much more content to cuddle up with Rennala, Leonard and Ranni than play, but it is decently gifted. Just, make sure you got a big board, don’t wanna have its paws knock over the entire board when trying to scooch the bishop around.
Rennala: A grandmaster of the game. Apparently her and Radagon challenged each other so often for the title that they eventually made Ranni. Anyways, she doesn’t go all out at all, and is more interested in learning your general strategy and tactics than winning. Chess mom.
If she has the egg though, game over, she’s pretty much immobile.
Morgott: Someone got Margit really goddamn angry.
Morgott is completely relentless, and the only thing that stops him from contending with the best of the best is that he’s always a bit self conscious about his performance. He’s very quick to act, and that’s not quite bad, but it does cause him to falter a decent amount.
Rykard: Presuming you can get him to size, Rykard is still…impossible to play with. Physically, the serpent lashes out anytime you try and move a piece. But, even digitally, Rykard’s moves are all completely nonsensical, and you have to remind him that you can’t have the pawns eat their king.
Fortissax: Despite being a faith build, Fortissax is quite good. However, he does operate by the bro code: he’ll only go as far as you’re willing to take things. You occasionally have to shake his head a bit to keep him from succumbing to deathblight, but overall, a cool guy to play with. Plus, if you’re nice, he’ll either hook you up with his sister if you’re into that, or just invite you to Ben and Jerry’s later.
Mogh: You always have the feeling this guy is gonna kidnap you if he loses. Not particularly good, not particularly bad. He does do that ‘holier than thou’ Latin speech though, which is super annoying
Malekith: The quiet guy at the edge of the tournament. Nobody plays with him most of the time, and he’s mostly content to just listen to Wii music, but he did train Marika and Radagon in everything they knew, sooooo…you’re getting your ass kicked. And that’s before he invites you to Twister with the other beastmen.
Dragonlord Placidusax: playing makes him really depressed, since he’s always reminded his kingdom is frozen in time from the moment of its destruction. He’s fine. A bit lacking in foresight, but fine.
Gideon: Gideon is actually incredibly talented, so much so he gives Rennala a run for her money sometimes. One of the best parts of being the all knowing.
Godfrey: He’s…not very good. Godfrey tends to zone out quite a bit, but the Lion on his back usually keeps his opponents unnerved enough. Generally, he accepts defeat quite easily and maturely, but there is a rumor going around that he exploded Malenia through a steel chair when she won against him.
Malenia: One small correction: if you lose, she does accept defeat.
Then Gowry comes in completely uninvited, pushes her out of the tournament, and starts beating you to death with a Connect4 board.
Marika and Radagon: The hosts, alongside Miquella and Ranni, who don’t actually play chess much, they prefer risk. Marika actually acts as referee, kicking out anyone who violates the rules, whereas Radagon is open for anyone to actively challenge. The only person who’s ever won against him were Gideon and Ranni’s fiancé.
The Godskin Duo aren't here. Maybe they were banned for attempting to murder their opponents and/or the judges?
That entire fortissax paragraph was golden.
Fire giant could totally play Chess! He would just be very, very bad at it for the first half of the game. Then suddenly he rips his leg off, sets it on fire, and his stomach has a face. Now you're playing against the Outer God of Fire. He tried to make a move, but unfortunately he's already burned the entire tournament to the ground.
Malenia is a master but her bs tactics pissed one guy if so much that he made it his life mission to whoop her ass at any moment possible. He has memorized every move she has ever made, every tactic she has tried and has played her thousands of times. Anytime someone is struggling against Malenia he walks up to them puts a hand on their shoulder and utters 4 simple words, “Let me solo her.”
@@icetide9411lol 😂
Rennala: big brain plays, would totally win if she wasn't constantly distracted by the crying baby in the other room.
Soldier of Godrick: forfeits after your opening move.
He only forfeits because otherwise he'd win before even moving a piece
@@georgekatkus5162 If he moved his hand the very stars would move too.
Or Rennala would bewitch the judge with her moon...ness and win anyway
@@WolfofSid64 it would be Miquaella seeing the item description of the game
@@Sasha-ph9uv Yep, but Rennala used the power of her Moon-ness to secure herself as head of Raya Lucaria
When I saw Malenia's section, my first thought was that she'd actually probably take it pretty well if somebody showed up to her boss arena with a chess board and challenged her to a match. But since she is, lorewise, probably the best general in the Lands Between, you'll probably find that she's never known checkmate, and does not intend to learn.
"Ah, you wish for a battle of the mind? Fine, I accept thy challenge. But I warn you Tarnished, I, Malenia, Chess Player of Miquella, have never known checkmate."
*Manages to kill your king with her pawn on the first turn.*
Malenia is the type of person who rarely shows up to a chess competition, but when she shows up miquella or Loretta Will spend the afternoon explaining that she trains in chess by fighting 3 tabs of stockfish at the same time
Assuming that being a general translates to chess which it does a bit but not that much. It’s usually more so general intelligence and we know Rennala is one of the smarter, and not too much about Malenias exact intelligence. Now put Malenia in a situation where she’s losing for the first time in her life and most people would end up spiraling. Maybe I just can’t handle the thought that Malenia is just the best at everything in that universe and unbeatable at everything that’s not very fun
She is fucking blind
I never knew I needed to hear godefroy described as "would try to burn an iceberg" but here we are
Elden beast seems like the kind of person who would show up 2 hours late, force you to chase its king around the board for 30 minutes and then randomly pull 5 queens out of nowhere despite having 0 pawns left and checkmate you immediately.
It's only half an hour after starting your match against the Elden Beast that you realize it's playing Siamese Chess, its teammate is Radagon, and your teammate is... well, I hope you summoned a guy beforehand.
@@theawickward2255
*Summoning Black Knife Tiche…*
@@goroakechi6126 I would've gone with Twinsage Sorcerer if I haden't seen him trying to cast Glintstone Pebbles on an enemy through a glass pane without realizing why his spells are mystically not reaching the target...
I'm guessing some bosses' elo ratings
Margit=800 (good fight for an early start)
Godrick=400 (just scholar's mate him)
Rennala=2600 (just resign because you're losing anyways)
Radahn=1200 (he plays fried liver attack against you)
Morgott=1400 (better margit)
Rykard=1600 (his mom taught him)
Fire giant=200 (oonga boonga moves only)
Mohg=1500 (ruy lopez enjoyer)
Malenia=2000 (mastered queens gambit)
Godfrey=1400 (says damn bro gg after every game)
Radagon=2300 (remembers every opening lines)
Maliketh=1700 (if not hungry, he's decent)
Loretta=2000 (respectable participant of the big leagues)
Godskin Noble & Apostle=1200 (knows how to play but never practices)
Elemer of the Briar=700 (really doesn't care)
Commander Nial=1000 (plays for fun sometimes)
Alecto, Black Knife Ringleader=1700 (will gaslight you into illegal play in their favour)
Sir Gideon Offnir, the All-Knowing=2800 (he knows it in his bones)
Soldier of God, Rick=1(don't worry about it)
@@goncalocarneiro3043 hard agreed with alecto and gideon but i guess niall should be above 1000 as he's the "veteran". he must be above 1500
@@goncalocarneiro3043 Damn Elemer is just me lmao
Godfrey is absolutely an e4 player, who always goes for checkmate and only has gambits in his arsenal, because he thinks you must always take a risk in order to win (he also hates draws more than anything).
@@goncalocarneiro3043 Alecto would totally make you gamble your entire wallet before you even realize what's happening.
Gideon is the one smart kid who has studied every single chess strategy and loudly boasts about his skills, only to lose the first game and be mocked by all the players
Tbf, if this were real there is no way Gideon would lose... maybe against Radagon, because he is sure that a man cannot beat a god
He knows all the opening like a book and then has a mental breakdown even when his opponent accidentally makes it so his queen can be captured
I know in my bones, a novice cannot become a grandmaster. A man cannot checkmate a god.
Gideon the type of to watch 50 UA-cam videos on chess openings and cheap gambits but doesnt actually learn any endgame techniques.
Nah, he struggles with openings and gives a small speech after his first few moves. which gives his opponents some time to figure out his strategy, but if he an get past that hurdle he plays super aggresively, and the round ends in under five minutes no matter who wins.
If Malenia is Magnus Carlsen, I think Miquella is that little kid who showed up like they didn't know what they were even playing before quietly demonstrating why stockfish is afraid of him.
Miquella is Elden ring mittens in my brain: super low elo but insane skill
In after DLC drop: Miquella is the one who brings his buff boyfriend and his posse to the table to smack you around a bit and when you outsmart his crew and put his jock boytoy in check he hangs off his shoulders and immediately starts whispering 3000 ELO strats directly in his ear, puts stockfish on standby, and shines a 101k lumen flashlight in your eyes every time you try and make a move. Either you're going to lose because the duo is playing at a level that will absolutely curb stomp you, or from blindness due to the awful flashlight assault on your eyes, or because the Miquellester decided to try and rizz you up in the middle of the match, and he's just that good so you quit so senpai will notice you.
I desperately need a part 2, this shit is great
Timestamps
0:00 Intro
0:55 You like ads?
2:01 Mad Pumpkin Head
3:19 Loretta
4:24 Ordovis
5:39 Radahn
6:48 Godefroy
8:06 Esgar
9:02 Margit
10:22 Fia and her simps
11:20 Malenia, blade of miquella. She has never known checkmate
12:42 End cards
Hey Rusty! Have you every considered going back to the other souls games and remastering them? See how your taste has changed? Maybe making new videos on the old games, too? Like ranking the bloodborne weapons, or the tools in sekiro?
I'd love to revisit some Bloodborne videos at some point. I'm sure my opinions have changed over the years
@@Rusty._ do you still do tgn stuff? I used to love that channel but I stopped playing over watch a while ago
Rahdan would vary heavily based on if its before or after he got the rot I think.
Radahn after the rot: Punches you in the face and eats the chess pieces
@@hoodiegal before he enters the room a giant arrow almost hits you and lands in the middle of the board .
@@hoodiegal Howling at the sky
After the rot he'd classify as the "not mentally capable of playing" category
Godfrey doesn't know a single named strategy and doesn't even seem to be planning ahead too much, but he's got sharp instincts and always makes the best move he could have on his turns.
Then the moment you checkmate him a bell rings, and you realize you signed up for chess boxing by mistake.
Oops
You should definitely do this with all the NPCs. Like Varré's maidenless ass.
Honestly, I live for content like this
Never run out of ideas, Rusty! I believe in you!
I'm still interested in seeing a ranking video on unique ashes of war. The weapons that come with rare or unique weapon skills that can't be changed or shouldn't be changed cause they're too good
Not gonna lie I have to give a round of applause to your creativity
did anybody else see the weird move at 11:36, a queen isnt suposed to move like that
yeah exactly, that made me so irrationally mad like wtf is that?! this is the fucking superman and flash chess game all over again "checkmate, checkmate, checkmate" like what?
@@Devilspadewere they not just playing multiple games at super speed?
@@jimshotfirst4887 nope
I would unironically watch a bush tier list, you can make a video about literally anything and it'll still be entertaining
I feel like Mohg would (upon losing half his pieces) declare that half your pieces must also die cause Nihil.
Then he would get half his pieces back
placidusax would be that old guy who looks like he would fall down dead every moment but would insist very strongly that you play. During the match he falls asleep at least once and he always mutters all his next moves and all ideas loudly before getting tired of the game, checkmating you in 2 moves and leaving but not before expressing his disappointment in your lack if skill
this is easily the most important elden ring video ive ever watched in my life
Radagon being the board’s queen is quite creative
Tbh i would have chose rennala because well... no shit
@@gabrielebasa4292 The kamehameha wave attack acts as a good signifier for omnidirectional long range assfucking to boot.
Godrick watched that one chess video and now unironically thinks sticking all his pieces together and turning the entire game into some weird miniature TTRPG campaign, and whenever he starts losing, he pulls out his "dragon" and attempts to make everyone bear witness.
I'm amazed at how everyone else is out of ideas for Elden Ring, but somehow you managed to create a hilarious and educational video.
You should rank the bosses based on how long they would spend in jail if they paid for their crimes. *Cough cough* Mogh.
That might require some investigation into how many articles of the Geneva Convention Malenia broke by rot-nuking Caelid. And determining how to judge Godrick and Rykard for crimes against humanity.
The Fire Giant, on the other hand, has committed no crimes; he has crimes committed against him.
@@theawickward2255 the fire giants crime is being a cunt that won't sit still
considering Ranni committed treason she would've been put to death had she not already killed herself
Mohg beat the pedophile allegations but not the blood lord allegations.
@@Typical_terorrist seeing how Ansbach is, I think Blood Lord isn't as bad as it sounds. Well it is his blood after all.
Before watching this video, I think Morgott is number 1, or at least he's in the top 3. If I remember correctly, he designed some of the weapons or tools for the Golden Order to be used for the war. He's also a king, so I think he's the king of chess too.
Edit: Man I really enjoyed this video, it has such a cool concept and your sense of humor along with your editing skills made it really fun :D How do you think the match between Morgott and Malenia would be, considering they're both grandmasters?
Please make a bush list.
ER's got some nice bush.
honestly it's just entertaining hearin ya go off, your alliteration is great lol
The perfect description of Margit:
“Oh, what? that giant tree with a blanket is a person?”
The fact that this video pops up as I’ve been binging learning chess openings is undeniable evidence that rusty is part of the UA-cam algorithm
I would pay good money to see an Elden Ring Chess Boxing tourney
Idea: Starting equipment ranking!
For example: rank the uchigatana because is the starting weapon of the samurai or the longsword because is the starting weapon of the vagabond
It took me legitimately 5 minutes to realize that the red and blue enemies are chess pieces
Goddamn you, Rusty; now I'm dying to play this non-existent version of chess.
I appreciate this video for its shear ridiculousness, and Rusty's unique way of presenting things sells it even more. I would definitely spend an afternoon watching a series of these
Agreed, but i gotta do it... "sheer"
Radagon: Imagine if the President walked into your chess tournament. And he’s actually pretty damn good. But if you beat him God steps in to have a go at you, and you don’t even get a break to comprehend what is happening
This is the weirdest ranking I have ever seen and I kinda love it. Good job rusty keep up the good work
I feel like Gideon would be like
"You fool, moving that pawn means you have played the rookie mistake of the Roundtable Hold, meaning I can now counter you with the Dragonspear to hook into the Greater Will or the Erdtree Seal to win the game in just 4 moves, you fool"
The thing you did at the beginning with the blue and red spirits lined up?? Was actually really clever!
I feel like Malenia would also just spontaneously be naked with no explanation once the Monopoly board was taken out, and nobody wants to say anything about it just because they don't want to be the first.
Hey Rusty, just gotta say you are my favorite Elden Ring youtuber because of how funny you are and how you give no fucks what people think and do what you want to do. (This video exactly what I mean). Hope you keep making the great content you do and always making me smile!
Malenia sits down, hands you a questionably translated rulebook, demands you play Shogi (Sekiro) with her, and tables you because you don't have the right skillset (animation cancel anything into a deflect) for it.
3:18 Random fact: you'd be bare minimum second civilian casualty. Watched a recent video from therapy gecko where he interviewed a bounty hunter looking for somebody who shot their friend in the face after losing to them at chess
That’s real?
Guess I should pack a bulletproof vest just encase the next person I beat is a big fan of the 2nd amendment
I'm a bit surprised there was no Godfrey one where he slams the table when it is losing.
elden ring and chess, 2 major things of the few things i consistently and unapologetically enjoy in my major life crisis of being a 30y old manchild, thrown together for no reason (i like that too) by maybe the funniest channel i recently discovered through the magic of the algorithm.
thank u, u make my life a tiny bit less miserable and alone
He's moving into rankings beyond our comprehension.
I think because of the scarlet rot ruining his mind, Radahn would simply eat all the chess pieces
This was actually hilarious and I'd love to see more shenanigans like this
Any opponent of Goldmask's would immediately forfeit due to his sheer brilliance
except the all-knowing, their battle would be legendary
Top 4 players of elden ring chess.
1. Radagon/Marika
2. Renalla
3. Goldmask
4. Gideon offnir.
Malenia is the kind of player to strategically place the bishops at the back of the board so they swoop in and take your queen and check you just as you think the game is going fine.
I can only imagine that as difficult as Malenia is, Miquela would be even worse. Not just because he's better than Malenia and Morgat, but because he looks like a kid, is super polite, and plays so subtlety that you only realize you've been in check for the last fifteen moves once he politely puts you in checkmate. Even then, you can't find it in you to be mad because he was so polite and genuinely friendly the whole time.
This is the quality we crave for
Not a Boss but I feel like Ranni vs Marika would be a chess match of the finest quality
I've never heard the Malenia fight explained so elegantly
Hewg: Doesnt know how to play, but after getting Roderika to tell him the rules, would play decently until he forgets.
Roderika: Plays pretty well, but starts to fold halfway through after losing hope and making a few mistakes. Game can continue two ways, she loses all hope and leaves the room quietly sobbing, or she gets some encouragement, rethinks all her strategies and starts playing like fucking Magnus Carlson.
Fortissax: "This human game is interesting, sadly Godwin never showed me how to play..." He gets sad remembering his buddy and leaves 6 turns in, also probably quietly sobbing.
What would your opinion be on Renala or Radagon in a chess match? Renala would probably be more or less catatonic for three rounds until you take her queen or knights, actively promoting a pawn to a queen decimating you for a few turns because she keeps getting key pieces through promotions and the odd judge interference until she unknowingly walks into checkmate because she had a nervous breakdown from remembering her ex-husband underwent transitioning surgery.
Playing against Renalla would be like "I'll forfeit if you agree to get therapy."
Rusty, fromsoft’s art direction is so good that I have no doubt you could make a bush tier list for Elden ring and it would still be amazing!
Summoner Snail could play chess, it could bite the pieces. Its summons do seem to have some kind of independent control so that's not exactly it playing, and that's why I said Summoner Snail should bite them.
You are the only person who can make ads fun to watch
i need a tierlist of Rusty tierlists so i know which tierlists belong inside of each tier
Now this, this is art fellas
I enjoyed this so much more than i thought I would, the funny descriptions and stories work so well with your usual style of insulting and complimenting facets of elden ring in the most interesting ways you can
This is legitimately SUCH A FUNNY DESCRIPTION OF THESE FOLKS
Marika would have an entire strategy ready to go, full of elaborate traps, deception, and psychological warfare, but it all crumbles because she did not notice that it all depends on her opponent making a very specific move in the beginning.
Thanks for uploading as always, good video👍
The Fire Giant is a clumsy player who doesn't get many opportunities to play, making you feel kinda bad if you beat him.
He has difficulty remembering which piece is which, however his hands are so huge they block the board whenever he moves a piece, making it really hard to tell what play he just made. He always accidentally confuses his queen for a bishop, and when you take it he gets really upset with himself.
That's when the Fell God in his chest wakes up and starts giving him advice. It's only a little better than the giant, but the huge flaming eyeball watching your every move makes it really hard to concentrate.
That's such an accurate analogy for fighting Malenia XD
excluding the spiritcaller snail because it doesn’t have arms doesn’t make sense because it can just summon something that does
He did it , he finally snapped
I have no experience with chess and only the slightest knowledge of the competitive scene but being a competitive Yugioh player actually helped me understand the kinds of scenes you were setting here. Funny that you referenced Cyber End Dragon, considering my pfp is capable of summoning it.
That's the char personnality list for an OVA excellent
You unlocked a real deep history with that Loretta one, Rusty.
Deep, deep, deepest lore right there.
I really like the idea of a chess tournament where there are no rules but nobody is told there are no rules
Now we need them ranked on how good they are at monopoly
Radagan is the guy who has never played chess before but is very good at it for some reason. Not good enough to 100% beat you, but good enough that you second guess yourself and accidentally make the wrong move that leads to him winning
Marika is telling him what moves to make
Margit without the robe is unsettling
This is one of the tier lists of all time (even though there weren’t any tiers or a complete list but I’m not complaining.)
Mohg eats the pieces when no one is looking
godrick: not very good since he's not exactly that smart but would try to always keep pieces around himself and bait you out
rennala: very good and would probably beat you most of the time even post divorce
radahn: is ok i suppose and has the most fun while playing, imagining it to be an actual battle, or he would get bored, either way he wouldn't care who won
rykard: pre-serpent, very good. post-serpent, would lure your strongest piece and try to get rid of them since he would try to find the strongest tarnished to eat, or just try to eat you since he's pretty much lost it, or just not be good
mohg: he has his own dynasty so would be very good, is pretty maniacal with his moves and would play the long run since he waited so long to raise miquella to adulthood/godhood to attack, he would actually be pretty cool to play with considering how chill he seems with the dialouge his boss fight.
malenia: is ok, would lose sometimes since she always wins in fights, not games. would be more intense later in the game and doesn't want to lose in front of miquella
miquella: would obliterate you but you wouldn't even be mad considering how nice he would be
godwyn: probably really good since he was able to serve the golden order so well, other than that i don't know, oh and he's dead so you couldn't play with him post-night of black knives, he'd just spew deathblight and spawn undead or other minions made from deathroot to kill you
morgott: is very skilled since he leads the capital, would try to to win in the first few moves since he attacks you at the beginning of the game, and would play the long game and try to sweep you later, if he lost he wouldn't like that but would also thinks that he's not good enough despite being very good.
maliketh: would pretend to not be good but once you make a slightly wrong move, he would most likely anihilate you
godfrey: decent and would be very repectful, overall cool to play with
radagon/marika: would be a silent player and is also decent at the game
ranni: you would never really know what shes doing, and you could never seem to get an edge over her, but once everything is in position, your most likely done
You know, I finally sat down to watch this and its far better than i coukdve hoped. Rusty put 110 percent into this.
Soldier of God, Rick: Forfeits out of pity
Malenia is the type of person to flip the board as she’s about to lose so that no one wins
This is literally the move she pulled out agains Radahn lmao
Malenia basically has an earpiece against her own will, and the Rot God keeps telling her to do all this dumb sh*t until she just flips the table and gives up. That was pretty much what happened before the Caelid Scarlet Nuke incident, if you want to give Malenia a defense for why she left Miquella in his most vulnerable state.
Godfrey does really good in the first half but goes all apeshit and gets too excited to close it out and ends up fumbling