The Worst Guide To Stardew Valley

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  • Опубліковано 20 лис 2024

КОМЕНТАРІ • 957

  • @PipHalsey
    @PipHalsey 7 місяців тому +3009

    In defense of Emily, in a world where magic does in fact exist, and my character religiously watches the fortune teller channel every morning to know if it's a good day to go mining or not, I think she may in fact be onto something.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  7 місяців тому +584

      Honestly fair point

    • @jackalopebob
      @jackalopebob 7 місяців тому +289

      when im having magic walking apples fix up buildings and im talking to bears everything emilys doing is just a average day in stardew

    • @highdefinition450
      @highdefinition450 7 місяців тому +108

      lmao right, there are fairies and witches and goblins and dwarves. maybe being into crystals isn't that weird lmao

    • @jackalopebob
      @jackalopebob 7 місяців тому

      and shadow creatures mummies juminos possibly elves ect @@highdefinition450

    • @Jackie89000
      @Jackie89000 7 місяців тому +90

      ​@@connorconquersand I'm pretty sure she is the only other villager aside from the Wizard who mentions the junimos. The way she mentions them seems to be that she sees them regularly. Either that or it's just drugs.

  • @Dark_sparky
    @Dark_sparky 8 місяців тому +1830

    "Have you ever wanted to live out the millennial fantasy of owning property" hits a bit too hard bro.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  8 місяців тому +130

      Yeah, once a video I drop a line that's way too raw it seems lol

    • @highdefinition450
      @highdefinition450 7 місяців тому +3

      i swear he didn't have to go this far what the hell man lmao

    • @bluezero8557
      @bluezero8557 6 місяців тому

      *laughs in land owner*

    • @tista42
      @tista42 3 місяці тому +1

      Somehow I bought a house (I'm 33) I still 3 years later do not understand how I managed to get it with a credit score of like 600 and at the time what amounted to a part time job. The pay was good but it was outside and weather effectively made my Job on average 25 hours a week.

  • @PendragonDaGreat
    @PendragonDaGreat 8 місяців тому +496

    The commitment to the bit with Grandpa's bed. :chefs kiss:

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  8 місяців тому +67

      They're the best mods for Stardew, hands down.

    • @PendragonDaGreat
      @PendragonDaGreat 8 місяців тому +33

      @@connorconquers i mean I'm partial to Greenhouse Sprinklers, but that's because I wrote the thing.

    • @toads13
      @toads13 7 місяців тому +13

      slightly worse grandpa bed, with the singular broken leg, is easily the funniest grandpa mod ​@@connorconquers

  • @GrandDuchessTaco
    @GrandDuchessTaco 7 місяців тому +274

    The kegs "allowing you to roleplay as Windsor, Ontario during the 1920s" line was absolutely phenomenal!

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  7 місяців тому +32

      Shoutout to my home town and the best pizza in the world.

    • @XSniper74184
      @XSniper74184 7 місяців тому +7

      ​@@connorconquers Hell yeah! I'm a Windsorite myself and it's alarming hearing friends from other places say their favourite pizza is from a chain restaurant. We're spoiled for great choice down here.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  7 місяців тому +9

      @@XSniper74184 I moved to the GTA and it's the same. Every time I go down to visit I hit up Fracos, Armondos, or Sarduchi's before driving back up.

  • @Derjulian01
    @Derjulian01 5 місяців тому +194

    I love how everytime "grandpa" is shown its just another cursed grandpa replacement

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 місяців тому +37

      They are my favorite mods lol

    • @Derjulian01
      @Derjulian01 5 місяців тому +3

      @@connorconquers couldnt agree more. Part of me wished you would have had a section just showcasing your favorites of those lol

  • @miasma1718
    @miasma1718 7 місяців тому +211

    this has to be one of the best stardew videos i've ever seen. the "2 shots of vodka" pam clip made me laugh unreasonably hard

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  7 місяців тому +30

      That clip loops in my head every time I see her. I had to inflict it on others.

  • @Joao-gu9qh
    @Joao-gu9qh 7 місяців тому +381

    I'm not even married to Krobus I'm just married to the bag

  • @machenification
    @machenification Рік тому +979

    Speaks about romance the whole time and takes time to call real life wife a dumpster diver. Here comes comes the VR love life portion of his life

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  Рік тому +161

      She knows what she's about.

    • @utsukushiidesu3966
      @utsukushiidesu3966 8 місяців тому +33

      When you find 5k euros in a wallet inside a brown stained pants thrashed away inside a bin you'll be checking every dumpster from now on

    • @BirnieMac1
      @BirnieMac1 6 місяців тому +9

      @@connorconquersmy partner is also a little trash gremlin
      she knows what she’s about too

  • @finleybrown8977
    @finleybrown8977 7 місяців тому +891

    as an ace whose first "romance" was Krobus I feel very seen

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  7 місяців тому +121

      This is honestly one of my favorite genre of comments ❤️

    • @JaneDoe-mu9xu
      @JaneDoe-mu9xu 7 місяців тому +47

      As an ace who married Sebastian (twice) before I realized rooming with Krobus was an option, and who is getting my monster roomie in my 1.6 playthrough, I also feel very seen lol

    • @gaberobison680
      @gaberobison680 7 місяців тому +23

      Asexual doesn’t mean aromantic but I just like video games because relationships are actually authentic and not just sex

    • @catsdogswoof3968
      @catsdogswoof3968 7 місяців тому +4

      Idk I'd want to change their world so either krobus or Alex as a male. You decide if you mean minecraft or statdew s on you

    • @blueaceospadesreal
      @blueaceospadesreal 5 місяців тому +1

      lol i'm aroace but i always marry seb because emos gotta stick together

  • @CsubAzUrmedve
    @CsubAzUrmedve 7 місяців тому +668

    The title said "The Worst Guide" but I expected the worst guide, not the best. I wanted to be bad at the game instead I got better.
    That's misinformation if I've ever seen one.
    My army of lawyers are on their way to your current location on their mobility scooter.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  7 місяців тому +138

      Any useful information this guide offers is purely coincidental. Apologies for improving your performance 💔

    • @moonyu189
      @moonyu189 7 місяців тому +21

      Here some worst guide, don't donate your first dino egg, sell it instead. Don't go to trader in Desert on Sunday and crafting staircase using only stones 😂

    • @violet7773
      @violet7773 6 місяців тому +5

      ​​@@moonyu189 actually don't donate your first dino egg, you should be incubating it and giving the first one that dino lays to the museum

    • @OneBiasedOpinion
      @OneBiasedOpinion 5 місяців тому +6

      Just a single mobility scooter for an entire, literal, army of lawyers. I like your style.

    • @arpaddezso9085
      @arpaddezso9085 4 місяці тому +1

      Nem gondoltam volna hogy itt találak csúb

  • @springlockedfoxy8396
    @springlockedfoxy8396 7 місяців тому +312

    Shane is my favorite and I will defend his honor. You, me, behind the Jojamart, sometime before 2 AM because I have to go to bed or I will pass out.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  7 місяців тому +75

      We love a good redemption arc lol

  • @PatchyTheP
    @PatchyTheP 7 місяців тому +64

    *99+ missed calls from Seanie Dew*

  • @FratoiuAlex
    @FratoiuAlex 10 місяців тому +235

    You forgot to add that Abigail likes to eat rocks

    • @ethanstyant9704
      @ethanstyant9704 4 місяці тому +10

      And doesn't know what to do with the majority of the edible things I gave her

  • @JustSayingVloggity
    @JustSayingVloggity Рік тому +199

    "Favorite Thing: Robin" Hahaha accurate

  • @connorconquers
    @connorconquers  Рік тому +75

    Thanks so much for watching! I hope you enjoyed. The editing on this one was WAY faster than my previous videos and I'm not sure if I got a little too fast. Let me know what you think. This one was a doozy to script and drag across the finish line but I'm confident the next video shouldn't take NEARLY as long to complete. Hope you all have a great day

    • @DaveScurlock
      @DaveScurlock Рік тому +6

      I thought the editing was great - perfect paced and continually entertaining. Such a great video 😁

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  Рік тому +2

      @@DaveScurlock Thanks!

    • @ruby_wired
      @ruby_wired 11 місяців тому +2

      Masterful. Fingers crossed your next video wins the algorithm lottery, this one deserved better

    • @phobos5509
      @phobos5509 8 місяців тому +2

      The editing was a little bit too fast at times, but when you sped it up whilst talking about achieving perfection, that was really well executed
      I would drop the music bites personally, I don't think they're necessary
      Great video though! I hope you algorithm gods treat you well

  • @thewarlocke5303
    @thewarlocke5303 7 місяців тому +64

    Elliot was my pick in my original first playthrough when the game was still new. However, back then spouses got jealous really easily. He was mad at me for giving everyone I ran into in town a jar of jelly as a gift. (was the only generally liked thing I always had a lot of) Divorced him and ended up not marrying him again for YEARS. I knew it was just a game mechanic thing that was fixed in an update but man did my salt hang on for a long time. Finally married him in the 1.6 update because the character I decided to play is a guy with long silver hair that might be some sort of elf, so I was like. There is really only one option here. Honestly he's super sweet and writes my dude poetry and makes coffee almost every morning. Finally over my Elliot grudge.

  • @i_am_ergo
    @i_am_ergo Рік тому +158

    1. The references and shoutouts were out of control in this one. FMA, BroScienceLife, BFG Division, 28 Days Later, the classic TBoI OST, Joseph Anderson, grandpa's bed…
    2. Loved the title of the HuniePop guide that's _totally_ happening. But - I didn't see on that list the Rimworld guide that absolutely *needs* to happen.
    3. Let's hope the algorithm loves this one. It's a banger.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  Рік тому +29

      A fellow exquisite taste enjoyer, I see.
      So Rimworld terrifies me but I do wanna do Song of Syx when its had a few more updates since "fantasy Rimworld" is more my speed. And I actually DO have a... frankly concerning, amount of thoughts about HunieDev and his work. Like, the title of that video could be "Auteur Theory and HuniePop"

    • @i_am_ergo
      @i_am_ergo Рік тому +8

      @@connorconquers Ooohh, that sounds delicious! Can't wait for your next piece, man. Cheers!

    • @turtlearmyjess6147
      @turtlearmyjess6147 8 місяців тому +5

      I'm here to second the Rimworld video, I love that game and your videos are hilarious

    • @BigMcDaddy72
      @BigMcDaddy72 8 місяців тому +2

      Plus, Rap God! That was a nice detail lol. Song of Syx us great, think they just added a combat update...

  • @Hi_Its_Chris
    @Hi_Its_Chris 7 місяців тому +248

    If you haven’t romanced Haley, she’s 100% worth it. She’s by far the most affectionate and thoughtful once you’re married.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  7 місяців тому +218

      This is like when people try to sell me on One Piece. "After the first few hundred episodes it gets really good."

    • @carcram
      @carcram 7 місяців тому +64

      ​​@@connorconquers tho to be fair, you'd be married to her before you get past the first 100 episodes of one piece

    • @Jackie89000
      @Jackie89000 7 місяців тому

      ​@@connorconquersEmily gives you drugs and a strip dance fairly early on.

    • @Pollicina_db
      @Pollicina_db 7 місяців тому +17

      @@connorconquers Same with Sebastian, he’s not all that

    • @sagapulastation1711
      @sagapulastation1711 7 місяців тому +25

      Honestly this is why i like her so much,she truly has such wonderful character development, and her cutscenes are really cute too

  • @nightfrostbreeze
    @nightfrostbreeze 7 місяців тому +151

    As an aroace who was so used to having to either suffer through an awkward (from my perspective) romance or miss out on a large chunk of the game, the inclusion of Krobus and as a roommate option with all of the same rewards was a game changer! I really wish more farming sims would have an option like that and not assume romance is the default goal for everyone.

    • @helloofthebeach
      @helloofthebeach 5 місяців тому +17

      I've wished since day 1 that the Stardew marriage candidates all had "just great friends" story branches, instead of arbitrarily capping you at 80% friendship. Literally any of them could have good reasons to enjoy living on a nice big farm as a platonic roommate.
      Yes, I keep my bed next to the front door and there are chests full of fish all over the house, but you have a nice little patio over there that I'm not allowed to cover with kegs.

    • @nightfrostbreeze
      @nightfrostbreeze 5 місяців тому +7

      @@helloofthebeach I wish that was an option too but for Stardew Valley specifically I can somewhat understand why CA didn’t do that since it would be a lot more work and he is just one guy. However that is an amazing idea for a mod!

  • @PatchyTheP
    @PatchyTheP 7 місяців тому +89

    You forgot to talk about the part where grandpa roasts you for changing your name to an item id

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  7 місяців тому +24

      Awww that would have been a fun include. I didn't know it did that!

    • @PatchyTheP
      @PatchyTheP 7 місяців тому +20

      ​@@connorconquersIt's not just grandpa Mr qi roasts you too
      15:00 I'm not sure who's this though

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  7 місяців тому +13

      Oh neat! Also, that's the character edit statue in the wizard's basement. It unlocked at a specific friendship I think

    • @PatchyTheP
      @PatchyTheP 7 місяців тому +7

      @@connorconquers You can actually access it much earlier by going to the witch's hut and using the teleport circle thingy

    • @rbirdenjoyer
      @rbirdenjoyer 3 місяці тому

      ​@@PatchyTheP You would need to finish the community center for acces to the witch hut so friendship with the wizard is the only early way to change your name

  • @BirnieMac1
    @BirnieMac1 6 місяців тому +19

    My few favourite things, teaching my partner THAT COMFY GAME DOES NOT MEAN WE CAN REST THAT’S QUITTER TALK
    And bullying Shane/Clint

  • @prudence8808
    @prudence8808 10 місяців тому +165

    I’ve never seen deprecating humor be executed with such perfection before. How you manage to insult multiple persons/communities to the core while being absolutely hilarious and simultaneously not being even remotely offensive is beyond me. I was so disappointed when I saw there weren’t more of these in your channel, though of course i understand quality content takes a long time to produce. I liked, subscribed and clicked the notification bell without you even having to remind me.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  10 місяців тому +17

      Well, good news is there's a new video coming this weekend or Monday! Just looking back on what I played in 2023. I'm trying to improve my turnaround time on scripting, and I'm always getting faster at editing and learning new tricks.
      And thanks so much for saying that about my jokes because that's exactly what I'm going for. I really try to make it clear I'm laughing WITH and not AT people. More to come soon, hope you like it!

  • @ruthiewitter569
    @ruthiewitter569 7 місяців тому +27

    This is criminally funny already
    I had a mouthful of sparkling water halfway gulped down when you showed the family guy death pose with grandpa and it nearly revoked my oxygen privileges

  • @edu2402
    @edu2402 7 місяців тому +46

    i've been married with every girl in stardew, i have 1000 hours in game and by my experience, i can say that haley is so underrated.
    i simply love how she just changes in to a fully new character, with a wholesome heart and dreams, her wills are so paired with the farmer in the late game, every dialogue makes me feel just like she is the canone partner.
    leah is great too, but as haley is not what you expect as a dating girl at the very start, its very probable that you just stay with your bias forever, and thats really bad cuz she is just an awesome character.

  • @puredemon5926
    @puredemon5926 7 місяців тому +5

    I love videos like this because as much as I may know a game and its secrets, I still don't know everything. Like the fact that foraging spawns each Sunday. I didn't know that until now.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  7 місяців тому +1

      I think that's only in regards to very specific things? I read that on the wiki and tried to find other sources to confirm it but couldn't. It's the 1 thing in here I'm not sure about and I kinda feel like I should have cut it? Maybe it was true once-upon-a-time but isn't now because I find fresh foragables all the time.

  • @beancheese3148
    @beancheese3148 4 місяці тому +9

    Sebastian is peak! 🙌 He has an incredible story, keeps working after marriage, lives his own life, helps around the farm often, tells you his family’s favorite gifts so you can be friends when not at full hearts, gives food and coffee often, adopts animals, encourages you to grow slimes and branch out, says cute things to the player and genuinely lightens up the farm and the player’s enjoyment of the game. When I really slack on feeding/watering my animals or watering my crops, he’ll wake up early and do it for me. Send me out to the mines with a coffee even. Ten/ten Sebastian is the best male candidate!
    (ps. And he has a sweet home and cubby addition! When he decorates, it always goes with things I’ve already placed down in game!)

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  4 місяці тому +3

      Unfathomably based comment from a fellow Sebby enjoyer.

  • @halftimedeus8871
    @halftimedeus8871 9 місяців тому +62

    Man the comment on failing to recreate the farm from the planner and resetting the world was spot on
    Still hurts

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  9 місяців тому +3

      I play too many games where this is a pattern. And yet, here I am yet again, looking at the New Game button 👀

    • @halftimedeus8871
      @halftimedeus8871 9 місяців тому +4

      @@connorconquers this happens to me in all sandbox games nowadays, doesn't help that my job also requires creativity
      But at least I actually have to work, so I can't just scrap something when it doesn't turn out quite the way I want it to lol

  • @crescentsrolls1507
    @crescentsrolls1507 7 місяців тому +173

    Finally,,,, someone who put Elliot above C tier,,,,,, I've been seen

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  7 місяців тому +86

      People rank him LOW?! I can't fathom. I wonder what its like being wrong all time time.

    • @fizzydrinkuno
      @fizzydrinkuno 7 місяців тому +6

      REAL

    • @smoredreyharsley5865
      @smoredreyharsley5865 7 місяців тому +7

      @@connorconquersi despise elliot 😭 i cant stand the way he talks with his bullshit poetry vocab

    • @sincerelyparand
      @sincerelyparand 7 місяців тому +15

      that's RIGHT!! i was fully prepared to hear another person shit on him, i love my beautiful dramatic poet husband

    • @mushroomconesiour2865
      @mushroomconesiour2865 6 місяців тому +1

      If I’m not married to Sebastian, I’ll definitely be married to him

  • @PrincessFelicie
    @PrincessFelicie 7 місяців тому +12

    Opening with The Town Inside Me, and just like that, you have gained my trust.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  7 місяців тому +1

      I set a goal moving forward to try and use 1 GGS song per video lol. This one and Extras are my favorites.

  • @petloverspy
    @petloverspy 10 місяців тому +29

    I found you through your Oxygen Not Included video which I don’t even play (but it helped me finally decide on whether to purchase it or not!), and immediately clicked on this which is one of my most played games! I love your fast pacing and dry humor, instant sub!

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  10 місяців тому

      Thanks so much! I'm hoping to put out more soon!

    • @petloverspy
      @petloverspy 10 місяців тому +1

      @@connorconquers I’ll be excited to see it whenever it’s here, honestly I’d watch you cover any game whether I know it or not!

    • @precisamesmo
      @precisamesmo 8 місяців тому

      I went through the same lol

  • @petlemons
    @petlemons Місяць тому +3

    When I first heard "Smell of the Game" in the Factorio video, I thought nothing of it. Now you're opening your video with Bridget's theme, you're giving yourself away! I would love to see what you could make with a fighting game as the subject.

  • @kaworuxx
    @kaworuxx 5 місяців тому +12

    Look man as a sapphic Haley just does it for me

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 місяців тому +3

      My guy, you cannot say that AND have a Femto pfp.

    • @kaworuxx
      @kaworuxx 5 місяців тому

      @@connorconquers let me keep the deranged psychotic white haired twink

  • @LeoFieTv
    @LeoFieTv 3 місяці тому +4

    As an aro-ace gigachad, I must note that we do in fact itch for human connection also. Platonic that is.
    And thank you for pointing out that we cannot fix Shane. He "fixes" himself. I don't like him either, but I appreciate his story arc.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  3 місяці тому

      I actually meant to add text to that scene that had them both saying, "let's be friends" but I forgot 😭
      And I agree, I really do like Shane's arc overall 😀

  • @fizzydrinkuno
    @fizzydrinkuno 7 місяців тому +44

    Elliot in a higher tier? Finally a good stardew valley video

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  7 місяців тому +8

      I was shocked to find this wasn't common.

    • @oddlyw1cked938
      @oddlyw1cked938 7 місяців тому +2

      ​@@connorconquers The ten heart event is really creepy, thats probably why

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  7 місяців тому +3

      Honestly, fair.

    • @fizzydrinkuno
      @fizzydrinkuno 7 місяців тому +18

      @@oddlyw1cked938 What I see personally is that in order to trigger ten hearts events is to give a potential spouse a bouquet (of course there is the loved gift but in general the game points you to use the bouquet)
      Honestly most players that trigger Elliot's heart event already were intentional seeking that, so it never registered as creepy for me. And also if you tell him to stop he apologizes and takes you back to shore. Not to say the situation wasn't creepy I know, but I feel that that its often inflated out of context.

    • @oddlyw1cked938
      @oddlyw1cked938 7 місяців тому

      @@fizzydrinkuno I never actually dated him because hes definitely not my type, I mean, im a writer but he's just weird, he seems really self centered and a bit stupid too, he kisses you without consent in the middle of a ship so you can't get away, and his letters are creepy. Ive seen enough about him to never want to date him in stardew valley, just like shane and that blonde bitch acting girl (forgot the name)

  • @baggedapplesgaming3207
    @baggedapplesgaming3207 7 місяців тому +5

    This was very good. At times, I wanted you to speak slightly slower or just take brief pauses, but your effort, love of the game, and comedic delivery/editing really shine here (not everyone has that comedic timing, nor the patience to edit it properly.) Thanks for all the work you put into this. I enjoyed it.

  • @fakesmile172
    @fakesmile172 Рік тому +62

    With your editing and writing quality I expected you to have at least 100k subs lol.
    Maybe I should give Stardew Valley another try...

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  Рік тому +11

      Heh, we all gotta start somewhere. I hope the algo likes this one.

  • @madscientistfamily5298
    @madscientistfamily5298 7 місяців тому +15

    Loving the a-spec rep!

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  7 місяців тому +5

      Enjoy that garlic bread, king/queen

  • @riahjaklich5691
    @riahjaklich5691 7 місяців тому +21

    "marnie please my animals are dying!!" 😂

  • @pihlajafox
    @pihlajafox 11 місяців тому +39

    6:16 the egg hunt was something ive never understood.. Like the main character is supposed to be between ages of 25-30 and they're fully committed to win a bunch of kids..
    Anyway HOW TF is youre channel this small but your content so good hoky funking Christ

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  11 місяців тому +12

      The egg hunt is hilarious to me too. Like, get styled on Jas and Vince. And thanks for the kind words! Here's hoping for some more growth in the future.

    • @krinkrin5982
      @krinkrin5982 6 місяців тому +1

      @@connorconquers To be fair, the first time I played, it was Abigail who won.

  • @VsWildArt
    @VsWildArt 6 місяців тому +5

    I love stardew Valley. I've never played but started watching while in hospital and all through my postpartum and now I've seen over 100 hours of play throughs. Now here I am getting you on my feed. Excuse me while a binge watch everything you ever made while I rock my baby to sleep

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  6 місяців тому +1

      Ayyyy congratulations! Postpartum suuuuuucks and I'm glad you found something cozy to help you through it. Hope you enjoy my other stuff too!

  • @DawnBurn
    @DawnBurn 7 місяців тому +21

    "Like Robin..."

  • @garettjohnson6978
    @garettjohnson6978 Місяць тому +2

    Dear God, when I saw the title I thought this was gonna be good and it did NOT disappoint!! This is literally the first video I've seen from you, but your commentary, editing, and all that are top notch!! Immediate sub!

  • @caldera99
    @caldera99 4 місяці тому +5

    Opening this "guide" with the town inside me is a pure stroke of genius

  • @SamWinters
    @SamWinters 11 місяців тому +18

    Got hooked on the humor in the ONI video, and happy to see it's consistent here

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  11 місяців тому +3

      It's funny, I feel like I lost it for a bit when is started scripting this, which is why this took so long to come out. I realized I was trying to write an actual guide instead of conveying why I love this game with a few tips thrown in along the way. That's the approach I had on ONI and that script came together super quick. Once I made that shift this video came together a lot faster.
      That's the perspective I'm taking going forward and the next video script is already about 1/6th done :)

  • @snartboy5000
    @snartboy5000 5 місяців тому +6

    half a minute in and i already know im gonna love the video, 0:35 sam x sebastian art IMMEDIATELY followed by The Town Inside Me playing. this is gonna be a good video

  • @JanusKrug
    @JanusKrug 7 місяців тому +9

    In defense of Haley, she has fantastic character growth and legs that don't quit.

    • @wafflebroz
      @wafflebroz 7 місяців тому

      She was my third marriage choice on my playthroughs and she has become a top two choice for me for sure

  • @hardiewolder1965
    @hardiewolder1965 7 місяців тому +3

    12:12 OK this got me more then it should have. Now supplying batteries to her will always have a different feeling... Thanks!

  • @erincraig11
    @erincraig11 2 місяці тому +1

    Tataru cameo!!!
    Edit: Astarion cameo, Brennan Lee Mulligan cameo, Erika Ishii cameo, I love it!!

  • @FinnickAnnie
    @FinnickAnnie 7 місяців тому +8

    The Sambastian intro killed me

  • @lucastabers8849
    @lucastabers8849 7 місяців тому +11

    That 28 days later joke went hard

  • @ghostreyn
    @ghostreyn 7 місяців тому +3

    I found my self laughing so hard at this, well done!
    Also glad I found someone else who shares my love of Krobus.

  • @Deandadee
    @Deandadee 6 місяців тому +4

    "Fighting rocks" I needed something to laugh at today. Thank you 😂❤

  • @fergushebbert817
    @fergushebbert817 7 місяців тому +5

    “Worst Guide”
    This is probably the best guide I’ve ever watched for this game, thank you so much

  • @onyxrin1946
    @onyxrin1946 10 місяців тому +5

    Wait are those fucking CONTROL title cards lmao god i love this channel

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  10 місяців тому +2

      LMAO, I actually address this in my next video. Glad someone finally caught me.

  • @sharymshadehood9762
    @sharymshadehood9762 8 місяців тому +7

    I subscribed. Not because I was asked to consider about it :v It merely had something to do with good pacing, well put thoughts and great editing. Very entertaining, shame it barely get pushed by the algo at a deserving ratio. Keep up the good work !

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  8 місяців тому +1

      Thank you! It's gotten a huge boost since my Noita video so I'm pretty happy about that. I really like this one lol

  • @ThePrimeMinisterOfTheBlock
    @ThePrimeMinisterOfTheBlock 11 місяців тому +6

    This is excellent. I shall be following your youtube career with great interest

  • @marifurucho
    @marifurucho 7 місяців тому +5

    Sebastian in S tier? SSS tier video!!!

  • @nearhuscarl386
    @nearhuscarl386 11 місяців тому +5

    I think I just witnessed another great youtuber in the making. This video is something that you expect to see in a channel with 100x more subscribers.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  11 місяців тому +1

      Thanks for the kind words! Here's hoping. I've got lots more planned for 2024!

  • @rubyeyed756
    @rubyeyed756 10 місяців тому +7

    A fresh channel with actually good jokes? Subbing with high hopes for the future.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  10 місяців тому +2

      Thanks! Hoping to have the next guide done for late Feb or early Match!

  • @user-kn1zm9vh2y
    @user-kn1zm9vh2y 8 місяців тому +15

    I unironically love Haley

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  8 місяців тому +4

      This radiates "step on me" energy but hey live your best life 🥰

    • @user-kn1zm9vh2y
      @user-kn1zm9vh2y 8 місяців тому +3

      @@connorconquers I swear this is not a fetish :(

    • @chair5613
      @chair5613 7 місяців тому +12

      @@connorconquersShe's got like three mean dialogues when you first meet her and then she becomes an absolute sweetheart after you give her a couple flowers off the ground, lmao.

    • @SparkyMuffins
      @SparkyMuffins 6 місяців тому

      @@chair5613 She will literally treat you like garbage even after you marry her. Turbo Hell tier

    • @chair5613
      @chair5613 6 місяців тому +6

      @@SparkyMuffins Yeah, that's not even close to true and easily disproved. Nice attempt to troll, I guess?

  • @GTNoName
    @GTNoName 7 місяців тому +3

    Why didnt i find this channel sooner , this is just peak content

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  7 місяців тому

      Well we're all at the whims of the algorithm so I'm glad you like what you found!

  • @lilyclark841
    @lilyclark841 6 місяців тому +6

    Haley is S tier for female farmer. Alex is F tier for female farmer. They swap places for male farmer

    • @SparkyMuffins
      @SparkyMuffins 6 місяців тому

      Bad take

    • @lilyclark841
      @lilyclark841 6 місяців тому +4

      @@SparkyMuffins nah the dialog literally changes 😭

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  6 місяців тому

      Interesting 🤔🤔🤔🤔

    • @DL-idk
      @DL-idk 16 годин тому

      You sure? I thought Sebastian is the one drowning in female attention

  • @creepyfishman6858
    @creepyfishman6858 5 місяців тому +3

    Im aroace and i just choose a different spouse each playthrough at random because i just like seeing the characters develop, i havent even 'married' krobus yet in any of my playthroughs. Honestly my favorite spouse I've had yet is Haley, I just like how her character genuinely changes for the better and you see a different side to her than initial impressions portray

  • @CompoundedProblems
    @CompoundedProblems 8 місяців тому +4

    Hey man, your videos are incredible. They're well written, funny, have great pacing and editing, among a bunch of other things. Keep up the great work and thank you!

  • @amelooloo
    @amelooloo 7 місяців тому +3

    the dropout/dimension 20 clips are killing me

  • @zekew5084
    @zekew5084 6 місяців тому +2

    It's actually amazing how many of my boxes you checked in that 10 second diatribe at the beginning 👏👏👏

  • @cloudvalentino
    @cloudvalentino Рік тому +9

    This was such an awesome video. This was good all the way through.

  • @brew.3032
    @brew.3032 6 місяців тому +2

    This video was genuinely so funny, and well put together. 😂 loved it!!

  • @adar9236
    @adar9236 Рік тому +5

    always a good morning when one of these drops

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  Рік тому +4

      Always a good morning when I can hit publish!

  • @odpieces
    @odpieces 4 місяці тому +2

    Haley F tier we are FIGHTING. I love your vids and have now binged them all so I'm keen as for the next one however we will still be fighting

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  4 місяці тому

      It'll be you and an army of angry lesbians vs me. I had no idea the fight I was starting with that one 😂

  • @judygambel2801
    @judygambel2801 7 місяців тому +6

    Still waiting for official romancable clint

  • @organicmicrowave6989
    @organicmicrowave6989 5 місяців тому +2

    Guilty gear music spotted in the wild

  • @mikepyne4554
    @mikepyne4554 10 місяців тому +4

    I cant wait til this channel explodes. You got real quality stuff!

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  10 місяців тому

      Thanks so much! I hope so, too, but I'm happy to just make these for fun. Glad people enjoy it.

  • @hhiippiittyy
    @hhiippiittyy 10 днів тому

    Hey dude, I just subbed.
    Your "Worst guide to..." videos are truly inspired.
    Keep it up, you are sitting on a gold mine.
    Thanks for all the laughs.

  • @parutan5699
    @parutan5699 8 місяців тому +3

    Just binge watched through your videos after finding your channel. I really like your editing and commentary style dude keep it up :)

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  8 місяців тому

      Thank you! Next video should be out next week!

  • @TotemSP2
    @TotemSP2 5 місяців тому +2

    10:37 As someone named Shane, this is shockingly accurate, what the actual turbo hell...

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 місяців тому

      I did him so dirty but its some of my best editing lol

  • @notspoileratall5471
    @notspoileratall5471 8 місяців тому +3

    7:56 3 monitors. You forgot about the Excel sheet😂

  • @SGresponse
    @SGresponse 10 місяців тому +1

    I love clicking the "New to you" tab in the YT homepage. It is what sends me to channels like this.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  10 місяців тому

      Thanks for clicking and giving me a chance!

  • @youraveragecommentor1212
    @youraveragecommentor1212 Рік тому +3

    For whatever it’s worth starfruit is the best plant in summer by a large margin, especially if you throw them into kegs.
    Good video, it’s always great to see one of your uploads!

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  Рік тому +3

      I know ancient fruit and sweetberry also outpace almost everything else, but I was more focused on Year 1. I try my best not to overwhelm, while at the same time hinting that you can go deeper into the games I cover. Like I said towards the end, there is SO MUCH to cover in this game. That's partially why the script took so long to finish and went through so many edits.
      It's hard to balance between "simplified information" and straight-up "misinformation" while still being entertaining and I don't have a good solution to it yet.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  Рік тому +4

      And thanks for the kind words! Hopefully it won't be FIVE FRIGGEN MONTHS between now and my next upload lol

    • @youraveragecommentor1212
      @youraveragecommentor1212 Рік тому +2

      @@connorconquers I see, thanks for clarifying, in that case you made the right move.

    • @youraveragecommentor1212
      @youraveragecommentor1212 Рік тому +2

      @@connorconquers of course, thanks for the great videos!

  • @ChrisG_90
    @ChrisG_90 7 місяців тому +2

    This video was fantastically written. What an actual surprise, loved it.

  • @dereklearnslow
    @dereklearnslow 11 місяців тому +3

    Love your videos. Better quality and more entertaining than a lot of other content creators on UA-cam. Keep doing what you do!

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  11 місяців тому +1

      Thank you! I'm really excited for what I've got planned in 2024.

  • @merusotajio2222
    @merusotajio2222 5 місяців тому +1

    Elliott is that guy who writes you a poem one day ,and this poems becomes a masterpiece remembered for hundreds of year after , although you should romance Hayley just to see what she truly is like !

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 місяців тому

      She yelled at me for not liking the cake she baked. I stand by my decision

    • @merusotajio2222
      @merusotajio2222 5 місяців тому +2

      @@connorconquers well that's petty 😭😭😭 I mean you asked for it ngl

  • @lil-z5147
    @lil-z5147 11 місяців тому +4

    am from Widsor,ON thanks for shouting out the random boring town❤

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  11 місяців тому +2

      BORN AND RAISED BABY! BEST PIZZA IN THE WORLD, FIGHT ME ITALY!

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  11 місяців тому +4

      If I can one day incorporate the guy who trimmed a bunch of hedges into dicks into one of my scripts I'll die happy.

  • @ManaFrostT
    @ManaFrostT 5 місяців тому +2

    daaamn this is some wild humour right there 🤣😭 I loved every second of it, wish I could forget it to rewatch it heheh

  • @gayjebus4079
    @gayjebus4079 7 місяців тому +2

    I just want to throw out there that the only thing you need to fix Shane is to be his friend. That's it. Just be his friend

  • @thehansboi
    @thehansboi 10 місяців тому +3

    Damn I thought this was from a youtuber with at least 50k subs and expected a backlog of videos, was very surprised when I went to check out your channel.
    Very good videos though, you'll definitely be big one day

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  10 місяців тому +1

      Thank you! I've been getting that a lot lately, so who knows! More to come soon.

    • @thehansboi
      @thehansboi 10 місяців тому +1

      ​@@connorconquersexcited for what's to come! Also just curious, were you inspired by kilian experience or another youtuber for making these videos?

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  10 місяців тому +1

      @@thehansboi I actually titled my 1st "guide" "A Garbage Guide to Oxygen Not Included" as a kinda tribute. I expected it to get maybe 1000 views max if I was lucky, so when it took off I changed it not wanting to look like I was ripping him off. But yeah, Kilian is one of my favorite creators. Other than him: Ssethtzeentach, Max0r, MandalorGaming, and GirlfriendReviews are probably my biggest inspirations for this format.

    • @thehansboi
      @thehansboi 10 місяців тому

      @@connorconquers I knew the title looked familiar! And I can see how max0r inspired it lol. congrats on the lucky roll with the algorithm in that video btw.

  • @MariaSolsikke
    @MariaSolsikke 2 місяці тому +1

    Just started playing stardew and the hole thing about stardew being a two monitor game is so damn true. Great video!

  • @mitchellstarrenburg3860
    @mitchellstarrenburg3860 11 місяців тому +6

    I see a loooot of queer references 👀
    But seriously, this is some high quality production value; instant sub.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  11 місяців тому +2

      Whaaaaat? 🌈 Queer references 🌈? In my Ultra Straight Video??
      But seriously, thank you! More to come soon!

  • @josiah6969
    @josiah6969 9 днів тому +1

    5:31 unexpected Tataru Taru sighting.

  • @lysandrarenshaw3584
    @lysandrarenshaw3584 7 місяців тому +8

    I want an alternate ending where Haley ends up with Clint XD And Emily provides the wedding clothes.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  7 місяців тому +4

      With the power of mods, anything is possible!

  • @UchihaKat
    @UchihaKat 6 місяців тому +2

    I was already enjoying this but then you hit me with the dropout clips? Immediate Like. XD

  • @FonVegen
    @FonVegen 10 місяців тому +3

    I like your style of humor and your editing. Definitely gonna stick around for future videos.
    Also, fishing is the most fun and relaxing minigame in SV, and that's an opinion.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  10 місяців тому

      Thanks for the kind words! I actually don't mind fishing but I just enjoy the farming parts of SV so much more. But that's what's great about it, there's a lil' something for everyone.

  • @cameronmyers2154
    @cameronmyers2154 7 місяців тому +1

    This video is fucking hilarious, great work
    Keep producing stuff of this quality and I expect your channel to blow up soon

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  7 місяців тому +1

      Thanks! Fingers crossed. The algo didn't like this when it came out but I'm so happy its getting more attention now!

  • @ryhder8416
    @ryhder8416 7 місяців тому +3

    Haley slander?? In my recommendations?? She is queen haha fun video though

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  7 місяців тому

      I incurred the wrath of the Haley stans with this one 😆

  • @trustrossa8673
    @trustrossa8673 5 місяців тому +2

    I literally love ur reviews. So high quality and witty

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 місяців тому

      Thanks! They're somewhere between guide, review, and shit post and I love making them.

  • @LasagnaTheArtist
    @LasagnaTheArtist 7 місяців тому +9

    Your take on Harvey is Unacceptable but the editing, queer jokes, and S tier references brings it back. Fantastic video

  • @lightning4743
    @lightning4743 6 місяців тому +2

    perfection was not fun to think about but it was fun getting there, that's the best way I can put it, good luck to anyone attempting it.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  6 місяців тому

      I was gonna go for it but then I decided I like going outside.

    • @lightning4743
      @lightning4743 6 місяців тому

      @@connorconquers fair.

  • @Swcher
    @Swcher 11 місяців тому +4

    I love shane's beta art. I also love SEBBY!!!

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  11 місяців тому +2

      I really did Shane dirty. But also, it's Shane.

  • @leobastian_
    @leobastian_ 6 місяців тому +2

    The fact that there is almost no punishment (is there anything beyond the start of year 3, which you can just redo whenever with a diamond?) for not optimally using your time but the game mechanics urge you to minmax anyway is honestly fascinating.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  6 місяців тому +2

      When something is engaging we are compelled to do it optimally, especially in games. A favorite quote of mine regarding this is, "Given the opportunity, players will optimize the fun out of the game." Some people take this as a sight against players but I always look at it as, if you're designing a game, the optimal way of play also has to be one of the funnest. And I think Stardew is a great encapsulation of that philosophy.

  • @Ashtarte3D
    @Ashtarte3D 8 місяців тому +3

    Poor Penny gets so much hate. She was my choice in first playthrough just because I wanted to get her out of the abusive shithole she was raised in. Yes she's not a real character but I relate to Penny because I was her when I was younger before I met my husband.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  8 місяців тому +2

      I have zero hate for Penny, she's super sweet but just not my type. And it doesn't matter if a character is real or not because the emotions their stir are. Connecting meaningfully to a piece of art is what its all about! Happy to hear you got out of a bad environment.