"He puts a desk between us. He may want it here to delay us in case we attack him. He must be afraid. Fear leads to cowardly acts. Cowardice cannot be tolerated"
@@themerchantof1175 The Krauts..... I mean the Kriegsmen don't have Lasguns with the ability to be set to full auto. It was the trade off they made for more powerful shot.
@@shmee123ful proceeds to put some meat rations on the grill while the tau get the wood burning under it while the krieg goes on and check the perimiter (just so he can use his tap of a plasma pistol on them before any of the three do get a chance at killsteal) i mean to wait for the time to alert them its not like kriegsmen always want the kill for themselves thats all
Well, their first mistake was bringing a Kreisman off of his tour of duty. He's depressed because he is not fighting in an irradiated hellscape. He's homesick.
He can't pay respects to the emperor who's idea was it to send a kreigsman to a paradise world probably got turned to a servator after the order was made
to be honest, it would be "interesting" to see a krieger get terrified, because they get better at fighting the enemies of mankind, and thus less likely to die.
@@tlotro625 there is a bit of lore on when few kriege regimented where deployed with a salamander company to get rid of what was either an ork waaahg or a chaos incursion from a planet and the kriegesmen let alot of civilians die to win and lest just say the salamanders did not let it slide. I don't remember where it's from but I know it happened
The fact the kriegsman has a fucking name at all means he's worth like a entire regiment. Most if not all only has an assigned number and maybe a couple letters if they are spicy.
I vagly remember a situation, where a "normal" commisar was assigned to a Death Korps unit. As they were later called during a battle, they stated that they shot the commisar for cowardness, because he ordered them to fall back. And thats why the Death Korps has special Commisars.
In one of the books a hive gang member took a Commisar hostage to try and use him as leverage to escape . The commisar just laughed at him because the Krieger's had orders to shoot anybody they deemed hostile , so they shot through him to hit the gang member .
Kreiger commisar's are not there to prevent cowrardess or betrayal. they are there to remind the Kreigers they need to make their deaths count rather then blindly charging through a minefield to kill 2 heretics when they could charge through the mine field 100 meters east to kill 3 heretics.
@@skorgevondoom___9571 this is now how I will refer to Krieg grenadiers; thank you for sharing your wisdom. Note: just realised it said death Korps I’m an idiot.
As Hanz shoveled an Ork to death he noticed Pe'ter wasn't doing shit up close, so he gave him tips later that day on melee combat. Now Pe'ter is the only Not Tau in existance to know how to use a chainsword properly
@@dantheman4876 Ok, so I was asking you why you stated that Pe'ter was not a Tau, because he obviously isnt a Tau but a perfectly regular human. Similarly to how I wouldnt introduce myself as not-president.
@@swordbrethrenmordred1230 Josh: "Yah can make a lotta different meals outta rats and ration packs if yah mix up the pieces together clever like. Hell, a lotta times I hadda cook 3 square meals a day for me self, me brothers, parents and grandparents outta the recycled nutrient packs we got from tah government an' all ah the hordes ah bugs that infested me family's shared apartment back in the neighbourhood on the hive world I grew up on".
The recruit is a nice young steak with some nice juices, the veteran is an aged tenderized tough steak with the smoky taste, the tau is some weird vegan meat your friend wants you to try, Hans is the meanest side of bratwurst this side of the Berlin Wall
Funny part is, the Tau and Krieger might get along if the Krieger didnt know. Sacrificing oneself for the good of the whole? Pretty Krieger. Everything you own/wear not being yours? Pretty Krieger.
kdon't forget extreme breeding programs dictating who and when you can have kids, being raised from birth to be soldiers (firewarriors) and loveing melee combat, oh wait the last one is just the kriegers.
@@56Scratch Gonna say no, they wouldn't. Same way that different sects of authoritarian governments and religions all tend to despise one another. They may love authoritarianism, but only in a very, very specific brand of it with their specific ideals. They'd probably hate each other the most of anyone even if their policies were at the core the same system, though there's quite significant differences between how Krieg is and how Tau are. Further that's a Grenadier, which means he's a Krieg veteran and already decided that he's going to die, the skull mask denotes an acceptance of the fate of death, and is only replaced if one actually somehow survives being in the assault ranks of Krieg and from there becomes an officer. Basically self-preservation instincts existing would be offensive to him.
@@56Scratch not an issue. You can multi class as an incitive for the players to use their brains and roleplay. Plus there is pretty much a 40k Guardsmen only rpg narrative on YT. Pretty sure you know it already. That narrative is blessed by the Big E himself.
@@DeltaPi314 I actually don't! I'm just getting into warhammer 40k. I brought the command edition as a trial thing (currently making space marines) and adore ITEHTTS. Would you mind giving me the name of the series?
@@DeltaPi314 That series was the reason why my first army was guard. Was just deciding on what I should get, IG was on that list, but AGP made me settle on it....
Pe'Ter: We should all work together for the greater good... Hanz: *Prepares To Murder Pe'Ter* Pe'Ter: ...of our wonderful Imperium and the glory of the mighty God-Emperor. Hanz: ...You live. For now.
All guardsmen party being deployed Hanz:..... Trevor:oh thank emporor finaly competent people Sarge, looking at his men:...define "competent." Peter:.... Sarge, looking at peter then to the others then to him,rince repeat:.......yeah allright you guys are cool. Recaff and poker? Trevor:by the fucking emporor Y E S. Hanz:*confused screaming* Sarge:*sigh* cutter see to doing something bout the krieger before he starts going nuts
@@Chrinik For perceived cowardice. You have to remember that a Commissar's job in a Krieger Regiment is to prevent them from sacrificing their lives senselessly. He has to convince them that the Emperor would be more happy if they kill a number of His enemies before sacrificing themselves. In most cases, those "executions" are just cases of Commissars not allowing them to bajonett charge a tank line, or stuff that would see them get killed with no benefit in turn.
the horrific accident was being born in an underhive. that such a terribly mutated abhuman would still show such loyalty is undeniable proof of the Emperor's divine intervention.
why do i feel like Hanz is the type of guy who would go out charging forward with a primed grenade and continuing to fire whatever weapon he may be holding at the time
Pe'ter: I would die for the greater good. Hanz: Wait, you mean you would die for the will of the Emperor, right? Pe'ter, weirdly defensive: Are you implying that the will of the Emperor isn't for the greater good? Hanz: Oh my God Emperor, you're right. Sorry, I missinterpreted you. I would also gladly give my life for the greater good. Here, you can have the shovel that was assigned to me. It would be an honor to share it with you. Pe'ter, almost crying: I love you brother, nobody else understands me as well as you. Hanz: I love you too brother. Would you like to go dig with me after todays duties? I'm adding an undergrownd wing to the barracs in my free time. Pe'ter: I would like that very much, I also love working for the comunity in my free time. Hanz: I never thougt to put it that way. Honestly, I learn so much with you. Like the other day, when you made me realise that my uniform and gear is technically something the Emperor generously shared with me. I cried for the first time that night. I get that you weren't going for this kind of humor, but I think it would be even funnier for them to get along based on their similarities, even tho they come from completelly different philosofies
Josh: "Hans, you have to at least *try* and be nice." Hans: "Would someone here kindly shoot me in the back of my fucking head?" Josh: "Why are you such a downer all the time? We're light-years away from the front lines on a paradise world where there's barely any crime and all the comforts of civilian life." Hans: "BY THE EMPEROR WOULD YOU STOP REMINDING ME!"
Trevor:How many times have I mentioned the mutants that look almost exactly like the mutants from back when I fought the bugs? The strange cults that keep popping up? The insects in the sewers? Josh:Isn't that just the average imperium hive city Hans and Trevor"By the emperor!"
"Trevor, the Commissar ordered a retreat while we were being shelled with artillery yesterday. Your experience makes you agreeable, do not be punctual for roll call tommorow." - Hans
@@Odd_Krieger Pe,ter:... is something wrong? Trevor:...we need to stop hanz from killing the fucking commisar. Pe,ter:why would that-...OH. Later Ciphas cain,rolling up:HEY HERETICS! Heretics, looking confused at ciphas cain Ciphas:hows your health plan? Heretics, confused:...uh- Ciphas:APARENTLY IT WAS GREAT! cue what the fuck how did we win
@@syweb2 Because everyone else will be scared to death when the "three armed people" and the "monstrous insects" come out of the sewers or when the "space bugs" start eating every one while he will be fulfilling is live purpose, killing stuff.
The squad finished their daily patrol Josh: "alright, all we need is to report to the barracks." Hanz: "I know a shortcut." Pointing at a trench line Trevor: it better not be another trench?" Hanz: "I made this for you!" Shouting at the squad Pe'ter: "you mean you made it for us." Josh: "we do have a paved walk way to the barracks."
In fact it is. But the imperial aristocracy/burocracy are like noooooo, let's add another enemy to the list! Over a single planet let's start a war that will span thousands of years! An allied empire that expands at snail speed while wiping out orks, tyranids, and is immune to chaos corruption, trades a lot and invents new weapons that our techpriests could comprehend with their help WHO WANTS THAT?!
@@juancarlos-uv4lh What is the best possible thing for the Imperium? That xenos fight each other. How do you plan do obtain that? We have 3 options: 1) caveman level strategy: lure them.forward, make them see each other, and hope they charge 2) renaissance level strategy: pay them to kill each other 3) globalization level strategy: pretend to be an ally and make them your puppet What I advocate for is to use the brains that the emperor gave us. Wake me up if you find that something I said is heretical. I'll sit here and wait for the inquisitor you'll denounce me to, to gib me a medal and kick you in dem nutz.
@@56Scratch CloakandDaggerGaming(taleforge) has the entire series narrated, It's damm near audiobook quality. I have all the chapters on my phone as an audiobook.
"The definition of their 'Greater Good' is undefined, and benefits only their oligarchy. Were they.. more receptive to the Emperor's will, they may have made good allies. Instead, they became enemies of the Imperium."
@@krel7160 "Uhuh, well, get back to your post with Hanz, we are expecting a very special guest. The Captain General of the Adeptus custodes, named Kitten. You and Hanz shall escort him even if he is more than capable of defending himself. Dismissed."
Hanze: if mask is removed you find a young man in his mid twenties covered in a large assortment of scars. Has a bionic eye in his left socket with many enhancements a gift form a Tec priest he saved costing his eye, his regular eye is blue those I don't recommend staring at them as one is filled with a deep seated shame. Women who were in the room at the time have been trying to sleep with him since even a few nobles. Hanze is a good singer those he only sings when alone most of the time, there always sad and depressing. (NOTE) NEVER PLAY A POKER WITH HANZE HE WILL NOT LOSE EVEN WHEN I CHEATED HE WON.
Ahem, the emperor does not tolerate cheaters and even if you cheat a krieg will win it no matter what you milksop, play fair next time and ya might win against him
@@akriegguardsman unlikely, wo allen Straßen includes the line "heir gibt es kein gewinn" which is too defeatist for any krieger to ever say. although the general mood does fit, seeing as kriegers are descibed as sullen.
Three guardsmen walk into a bar Josh: I'll take a beer if that's alright. Trevor: whiskey. Pe'ter: Some wine is good so I'll buy a round for everyone, that would be even greater Hans: Werden Sie nicht wasserabhängig, es wird Sie ergreifen und Sie werden seine Abwesenheit ärgern!
@@tempsinger7418 "Do not become addicted to water. It will take hold of You, and You will resent it's absence" Tell me that Isn't exactly the sort of thing a deathworlder would say XD It's a sly reference to the film Mad Max Fury Road
Well actually Krieg has very little in common with german, about the only thing they have in common is the bottom and mid part of the helmet that looks like a stalhelm, the rest of the uniform is mostly inspired by WW1 french uniform and the gas mask is a WW2 allied variant, and I think the boots are ww1 german tho
We took the krieger to a therapy session. And learned he hasn't been able to clean his shovel in three to four weeks. He gave a very angry grunt towards one of our employees and...well he killed a potential heretic. All and all a pretty successful session in my opinion. I'll be getting him a new shovel with a sharper edge
@@SetuwoKecik No, they're like Kriegers in that every world outside of theirs is shit unless it's reduced to a hell resembling theirs. A catachan was disappointed when he killed a giant tyrannid (since he killed more dangerous / larger animals) and another was happy for living in an excessively dangerous world for the emperors sake. Krieg loves it when the world is a massive trench network of attrition, radiation, and barb wire Catachan love it when the world is a jungle with vast amounts of hyper-lethal monsters
"I am more disappointed then a Kriegs Corp member on a Paradise world" TTS verse, can not remember who pecisely. Edit: according to @MiklosHubler below it was: "I am as let down as a Death Korps Guardsman on a Paradise world" - Papa Smurf (aka Marneus Augustus Calgar)
-----Open: Request form: Requested presence: Ordo Hereticus or General Inquisitorial inquiry. Issue: Suspicion of Heretical behavior or possible infiltrator presence within a Guard unit on a Paradise world. Note: The possible Xeno/Heretical infiltrator goes by the name Pe’ter, and is embedded within the planet’s guard. Notable features include lack of a nose. A reprehension for Melee and Melee training. As well as this overwhelming sense of sharing as a part of his mentality. It is unconfirmed due to lack of investigation, but it is possible that this suspect could be Tau. Unless he is faithful to the emperor, or possible of being converted to the Ordo Xenos, then it is suggested that he is terminated and replaced. ------ Signatory-------- High Commissar Thorp, Planetary Garrison Command Posting #0198347652901-8810 Additional request--- Someone please either send me someone to train my Commisars to deal with Kriegers or get this mad bastard off my rock. I’ve looked at his forms, and while by Krieg standards his record is nothing short of disappointing, by mine he is a valuable asset that could be used more effectively in battle by NOT being stationed on a leisure Paradice world. The Emperor Protects. --------Nothing Follows--------
Krieger: "I'd like to report an issue with our rations." Commissar: "Oh, you never complain. What could be the matter with them?" Krieger: "The rations far exceed daily nutritional requirements, are served at a disagreeable 65°C, and appear to have been poisoned with something the ration-distributor calls 'spices.' May I perform the execution?"
@@dans9097 Commisar: Ohh yeah..... You see, this is what a regular Citizen need to survive and spices are not poison, they are used to give more "taste" to the ration
@@dans9097 Commisar: wait... The world taste is not only used as "taste my bullet" but its a proprety of the food, people dont only want to have the nutrional value but also they want that the food feel good in their mouth
@@kriegmans2344 Feeling good? Being a devoted soldier in service to the Emperor isn't good enough for them, they need to become heretics and indulge in pleasure?! *raises up Lasrifle*
@@56Scratch The Ordo hereticus would like to talk to you and the governor. We just want to be safe that NO SLANNESHI CULTS are currently on the planet.
I like to imagine hanz just spends his time trying to teach pe'ter how to fight with melee weapons while pe'ter tries to work around the whole sacrifice mentality to explain that they are more useful to the greater imperium (greater good) if they don't die in the first 5 seconds of a battle
The real fun is 'Da Deffwotch' (a bunch of Orks wearing pieces of space marine armor and pretending to be deathwatch, because that way they get sent to all the nastiest fights)
this honestly feels like the setup for vermintide "a dwarf with a secretive past, an elf veteran, a witch hunter with guilt, a shamed fire wizard, and the best the empire has to offer walk into the end of the world"
@@Regular93 Both Josh, Pe'ter and Trevor do work Cadian style body-armor. This type of uniform is not the standard of the Imperial Guard as a whole, even though it would be easy to think with it's wide spread representation.
@John Doe I call Cadian the meet or beat standard for guardsmen. A planet's troops need to perform as well as the Cadian style standard to keep their individually as an army. It allows the Imperal Guard to gain access to specialized troops without wasting resources.
@@Myuutsuu85 Cadian pattern armour and fatigues are widespread across the entire galaxy; its the closest thing the Guard got to a « standard » uniform; many PDFs uses similar gears as well Its all because of Cadia being an icon in the Imperium; hell even Cadians battle doctrines and tactics are replicated in others worlds With that said; I wonder if anyone tries to replicate Krieg’s style somewhere
The Death Korps of Kreig have been known to execute their Commissars for cowardice. They weren't even cowards either the Death Korps are just so fanatic about the Emperor that they would do suicide charge after suicide charge. Hell the Commissar's job in the Death Korps is to make sure the Guardsmen don't get themselves all killed.
@@Regular93 Not a good idea. Kitten: Tau? Tau? Tau?TAAAUUU!!! Extermintus! Exteminatus! Exterminatus! Wammu: YEESSS kill all the normies Magnus: NOOOO dont destroy a whole Planet. Acdc: Can we go on a date if i Help you hot Sauce Boy? Emperor: Prohibitionhammer ! Boy: What is a Tau? Kars: Shut up Boy Boy: :( Dorn: Boy the Tau are a Xeno Race. Kars : I know that
"we all ignore him, since what could go wrong here?" You've got a Death Korps of Krieg Grenadier...with a *NAME* ....whatever can go wrong, *it*will be very very sorry...
"The Commissar is afraid of him for some reason." Me: "Noticing Hanz got finger on pin that release grenade firing sequence." Also Me: "I see a reason clearly."
That's the grenade's pin he's toying with, like the total Krieg nutter he is. The germans used grenades like those, the pin was at the end of the long handle, which allowed them better leverage to throw it.
the "potato masher" grenades he has had a twist off cap on the end, which protected the "pin" as we know it (the bit he's got his thumb on) which goes up a tube in the handle of the grenade itself and deploys the fuse inside the explosive portion on the end.
The interesting thing about the death corps of krieg is that they’re actually more inspired by the French WW1 soldiers. And honestly the French are way more terrifying than history memes make them out to be.
stick me in a room with ww2 french and polish fighters and i'd probably choose the polish. they did impressive feats with so little people and supplies. the french had the means to get supplies but the polish were smack in the middle of two fronts making any kind of aid or supply runs almost impossible. they tried twice and stopped after one partially successful and a completely failed attempt.
Two things One. The kreigsmen scars the commisar that's fucking terrifying just thinking about it. Two. that paradice world is going to be fortified as hell when hans is done.
Josh: We got 2 hours till lunch so, LETS HAVE SOME FUN!! Hanz: *confused gasmask noises* Josh: Well.. Ummm. How do I put this.... What do you like doing? Hanz:*gasmask noises* Josh: The 1st one is a no go but I think I have the perfect idea for the second one. 10 minutes later Josh: BEACH PARTY!!! Trevor: Watch out of water bugs *shivers* they are some mean mother frackers Pe'ter: I think I will stay on the beach what about you hanz... Hanz? Hanz: *digging a trench line* Pe'ter: On second thought the water looks very good *1 hours and 30 minutes later* Josh: Alright we got to go to lu- *falls into trench* ow Trevor: Looks like hanz was busy with this tench... Looks a lot like my old one Pe'ter: But where is hanz? Hanz: *Currently digging command post*
The Commissar would, but Pe'ter is smart enough to stay just close enough to Hanz to scare off the Commissar, but far enough away to be out of shovel range just in case he can actually see colors well enough through that gas mask to tell he's blue.
"The Commissar is afraid of him for some reason."
Meanwhile, Hanz: *closely examining the Commissar for any trace of cowardice*
"He puts a desk between us. He may want it here to delay us in case we attack him. He must be afraid. Fear leads to cowardly acts. Cowardice cannot be tolerated"
@@followerofannus1610
*whips out shovel*
"I'm the commissar now bitch"
Kreigsman to the commisar: Smells like bitch in here.
Retreat? Tactical withdrawl? HERESY WITH EXTRA STEPS! *Grabs shovel.*
Definitely not a Tau: "For the greater... emperor?"
Typical Guardsman: "Seems legit."
“Wait, are you saying there is a Greater Emperor than The GOD EMPEROR OF MANKIND?!? HERESY!!!”
*Las-gun set to full auto*
@@themerchantof1175 *Inquisitorial bolt gun from behind* There is always a greater emprah. It's just who's.
Are they shooting at us? No? They are allies.
(Guardsmen probably)
"How do you do, fellow Humans?"
@@themerchantof1175 The Krauts..... I mean the Kriegsmen don't have Lasguns with the ability to be set to full auto. It was the trade off they made for more powerful shot.
So a conscript, a veteran, a tau and a krieger walk into a bar...
Tau gets turned to jelly via rifle butts
Conscript, venteran and krieger look at tau and then each other. 'looks like meat's back on the menu boys'
tau sweats nervously
@@shmee123ful proceeds to put some meat rations on the grill while the tau get the wood burning under it while the krieg goes on and check the perimiter (just so he can use his tap of a plasma pistol on them before any of the three do get a chance at killsteal) i mean to wait for the time to alert them its not like kriegsmen always want the kill for themselves thats all
I mean...is an advanced paradise world(which the knowledge of memes has been pass down)
@@shmee123ful "How does it feel to be in MELEE Range you filthy xeno."
Well, their first mistake was bringing a Kreisman off of his tour of duty. He's depressed because he is not fighting in an irradiated hellscape. He's homesick.
Don’t worry. When those Genestealers that Trevor is raving about pop up Hans will die a happy man.
Homesick is just krieger slang for ‘was up top without a fully enclosed suit and gas mask for 0.01 seconds and got irradiated’
yeah thats true a circleman is realy a fish out of the water when hes not on tour
Kriegsmen are always depressed.
What's worse, he has a SKULL-mask. Meaning, he is a fucking Grenadier.
Translation: I pity the Bugs and the Commissar alike.
A Krieger on a Paradise World literally Hell for him XD
He can't pay respects to the emperor who's idea was it to send a kreigsman to a paradise world probably got turned to a servator after the order was made
I'm just picturing a garden of eden with Hanz' head peeking out from the trenchline and bunker he hand-dug upon arrival.
@@jambamenome8481 give him a break, he just wanted to feel at home
"Ughhhh, It´s all so saaavvveeee here.... HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO DIE FOR THE EMPEREROR?!"
@@jambamenome8481 I see him going full Twitch from "All-Guardsmen Party" Especially if he's a demolitions expert.
Bro, they’ll be fine. They have a LIVING Krieger Grenadier with an HONORED NAME.
to be honest, it would be "interesting" to see a krieger get terrified, because they get better at fighting the enemies of mankind, and thus less likely to die.
@@tlotro625 there is a bit of lore on when few kriege regimented where deployed with a salamander company to get rid of what was either an ork waaahg or a chaos incursion from a planet and the kriegesmen let alot of civilians die to win and lest just say the salamanders did not let it slide. I don't remember where it's from but I know it happened
The fact the kriegsman has a fucking name at all means he's worth like a entire regiment.
Most if not all only has an assigned number and maybe a couple letters if they are spicy.
He could just be called Hanz by the others, as it's easier for them to say than 1836394 or whatever it is
A Krieger Grenadier is probably the most dangerous Baseline Human in any room he's ever in
I vagly remember a situation, where a "normal" commisar was assigned to a Death Korps unit. As they were later called during a battle, they stated that they shot the commisar for cowardness, because he ordered them to fall back.
And thats why the Death Korps has special Commisars.
In one of the books a hive gang member took a Commisar hostage to try and use him as leverage to escape . The commisar just laughed at him because the Krieger's had orders to shoot anybody they deemed hostile , so they shot through him to hit the gang member .
@@ds2781 haaaardcore
Kreiger commisar's are not there to prevent cowrardess or betrayal. they are there to remind the Kreigers they need to make their deaths count rather then blindly charging through a minefield to kill 2 heretics when they could charge through the mine field 100 meters east to kill 3 heretics.
@@terran046 exactly, sacrifice not suicide, who wants to waste the Emperor's currency
Aren’t the Commisars of the Death Korps Kriegers themselves? Or are they just tough bastards who manage to get through to the Kriegers?
Not only is Hanz a krieg guardsmen, he has the skull gass mask. He is a death corpse grenadier.
Or as i know them
"RUN THOSE BASTARDS HAVE CHAIN-SHOVEL BAYONETS FOR THEIR HELLGUNS"
@@skorgevondoom___9571 this is now how I will refer to Krieg grenadiers; thank you for sharing your wisdom.
Note: just realised it said death Korps I’m an idiot.
@@rattler9138 You have been booped
The commissar is right to fear Hanz
kinda short for a grannadier, but hey if the dude earned his helmet his strength is not to be questioned
As Hanz shoveled an Ork to death he noticed Pe'ter wasn't doing shit up close, so he gave him tips later that day on melee combat. Now Pe'ter is the only Not Tau in existance to know how to use a chainsword properly
What? Tau? Where did you take that from? Why do you state hes not a Tau? That seems pretty superfluous.
@@derfzgrld dude its the running joke of the comments section
@@dantheman4876 I dont think you got my joke then.
@@derfzgrld I don't
@@dantheman4876 Ok, so I was asking you why you stated that Pe'ter was not a Tau, because he obviously isnt a Tau but a perfectly regular human. Similarly to how I wouldnt introduce myself as not-president.
Josh definitely needs to survive, a decent cook is hard to come by these days in the 41st millennium.
Protect the cook!
There would be more cooks, if you had more ingerdients then rationbars and rats, to discover your talent.
@@swordbrethrenmordred1230 REFERENCES EVERYWHERE!
He might be part ratling.
@@swordbrethrenmordred1230
Josh: "Yah can make a lotta different meals outta rats and ration packs if yah mix up the pieces together clever like.
Hell, a lotta times I hadda cook 3 square meals a day for me self, me brothers, parents and grandparents outta the recycled nutrient packs we got from tah government an' all ah the hordes ah bugs that infested me family's shared apartment back in the neighbourhood on the hive world I grew up on".
So dead meat, an actual veteran, totally not a tau, and a kriger.
So just dead meat
@@bluesunday2585 dead meat, and a Krieger (Meat what wishes for death)
Dead meat, hard to kill meat, meat that can’t melee for shit and meat that wants to die
@@ReconMDFK The Tyranid perspective! How rare!
The recruit is a nice young steak with some nice juices, the veteran is an aged tenderized tough steak with the smoky taste, the tau is some weird vegan meat your friend wants you to try, Hans is the meanest side of bratwurst this side of the Berlin Wall
Funny part is, the Tau and Krieger might get along if the Krieger didnt know.
Sacrificing oneself for the good of the whole? Pretty Krieger. Everything you own/wear not being yours? Pretty Krieger.
Interesting....
But if Hanz gets wise it the shovel for Pe'ter!
kdon't forget extreme breeding programs dictating who and when you can have kids, being raised from birth to be soldiers (firewarriors) and loveing melee combat, oh wait the last one is just the kriegers.
@@56Scratch Gonna say no, they wouldn't. Same way that different sects of authoritarian governments and religions all tend to despise one another. They may love authoritarianism, but only in a very, very specific brand of it with their specific ideals. They'd probably hate each other the most of anyone even if their policies were at the core the same system, though there's quite significant differences between how Krieg is and how Tau are. Further that's a Grenadier, which means he's a Krieg veteran and already decided that he's going to die, the skull mask denotes an acceptance of the fate of death, and is only replaced if one actually somehow survives being in the assault ranks of Krieg and from there becomes an officer. Basically self-preservation instincts existing would be offensive to him.
You are right, but not in this case. It only works that way if they actually know they are different.
1 saniye önce
Hol'up. You tellin me, that "Pe'ter" was caught by Hanz without a bayonette... and he just let that slide?!
Must be really depressed on this world
maybe he had a really good shovel?
Give Hanz a break dude. He's under a lot of stress.
Bayonette is a poor excuse for the lack of shovel.
Maybe Hanz stole his bayonet to add to his collection?
This would be a helluva starter for a tabletop RPG
When everyone in the party accidentally chooses the same class
@@56Scratch not an issue. You can multi class as an incitive for the players to use their brains and roleplay.
Plus there is pretty much a 40k Guardsmen only rpg narrative on YT. Pretty sure you know it already. That narrative is blessed by the Big E himself.
@@DeltaPi314 I actually don't! I'm just getting into warhammer 40k. I brought the command edition as a trial thing (currently making space marines) and adore ITEHTTS. Would you mind giving me the name of the series?
@@56Scratch BRUH, Fix this heresey right now: ua-cam.com/video/1pU62-Ex1cU/v-deo.html
@@DeltaPi314 That series was the reason why my first army was guard. Was just deciding on what I should get, IG was on that list, but AGP made me settle on it....
Pe'Ter: We should all work together for the greater good...
Hanz: *Prepares To Murder Pe'Ter*
Pe'Ter: ...of our wonderful Imperium and the glory of the mighty God-Emperor.
Hanz: ...You live. For now.
Trevor: I swear, if he wasn't so good at range, he'd have been spaced years ago.
All guardsmen party being deployed
Hanz:.....
Trevor:oh thank emporor finaly competent people
Sarge, looking at his men:...define "competent."
Peter:....
Sarge, looking at peter then to the others then to him,rince repeat:.......yeah allright you guys are cool. Recaff and poker?
Trevor:by the fucking emporor Y E S.
Hanz:*confused screaming*
Sarge:*sigh* cutter see to doing something bout the krieger before he starts going nuts
Hans: Your on thin fraggin ground Pe’Ter
Imagine if a exiled ork joins them because he believes on big E, this orkz are called Imperial Boiz
@@Sombra_zx Nah nah, E-Boiz
"We all ignore him, since what could go wrong here?"
-Famous last words
Was- was he talking about genestealers hiding in the sewers? If that's the case then the planet is sooooo horribly fucked lol
If gene stealers hid in the sewer, think dropping a match down there could burn them all due to all the methane and chemicals
@Douglas Babb Planetary Governor. Who usually don't care
@@zippyparakeet1074 Just send Hans to go deal with them, it’ll cheer him up.
@@cryamistellimek9184 The only thing they fear is shovel
when the commissar is afraid, you know the dude's serious
Dude has his finger ready to pull the pin and send everyone to the Emperor.
Kriegers routinely execute Commissars for cowardice...no joke. They are THAT devoted to their craft.
@@Chrinik For perceived cowardice. You have to remember that a Commissar's job in a Krieger Regiment is to prevent them from sacrificing their lives senselessly. He has to convince them that the Emperor would be more happy if they kill a number of His enemies before sacrificing themselves.
In most cases, those "executions" are just cases of Commissars not allowing them to bajonett charge a tank line, or stuff that would see them get killed with no benefit in turn.
@@Chrinik In Krieg Corp, guardsman execute commissar.
Pfft you should try to guess how log a commissar lasts trying to lead Cadachan jungle fighters
Wow that sucks, Pe’ter lost his nose, and a finger on each of his hands to that horrific accident, truly a shame.
im ur 69th like, Nice
Also gained hooves.
@@steampoweredmaniac5359 And his skin turned blue.
@@jarekwrzosek2048 Pe’ter’s a mess
the horrific accident was being born in an underhive. that such a terribly mutated abhuman would still show such loyalty is undeniable proof of the Emperor's divine intervention.
why do i feel like Hanz is the type of guy who would go out charging forward with a primed grenade and continuing to fire whatever weapon he may be holding at the time
Give him a lunge mine and watch the explosions
Thats the Krieg Death Korps in a nutshell
you forget his trusty shovel
Dont forgot the shovel or else...
>whatever weapon
You mean shovel?
I have a feeling that Hanz's shovel has more kills than Pe'ter.
And that's not even with Hanz holding the shovel!
Why though? Pe'ter might be a great marksman for all we know.
@@56Scratch sentient shovel you say, praise the omnissiah!
@@skitariiranger4346 PRAISE BE UNTO THE MIGHTY SHOVEL
@@Matihood1 Pe'Ter is undoubtedly a good shot most likely.
The idea of a Tau and a Krieger trying to work together might be the funniest thing I've ever imagined... 😂😂😂
Pe'ter: I would die for the greater good.
Hanz: Wait, you mean you would die for the will of the Emperor, right?
Pe'ter, weirdly defensive: Are you implying that the will of the Emperor isn't for the greater good?
Hanz: Oh my God Emperor, you're right. Sorry, I missinterpreted you. I would also gladly give my life for the greater good. Here, you can have the shovel that was assigned to me. It would be an honor to share it with you.
Pe'ter, almost crying: I love you brother, nobody else understands me as well as you.
Hanz: I love you too brother. Would you like to go dig with me after todays duties? I'm adding an undergrownd wing to the barracs in my free time.
Pe'ter: I would like that very much, I also love working for the comunity in my free time.
Hanz: I never thougt to put it that way. Honestly, I learn so much with you. Like the other day, when you made me realise that my uniform and gear is technically something the Emperor generously shared with me. I cried for the first time that night.
I get that you weren't going for this kind of humor, but I think it would be even funnier for them to get along based on their similarities, even tho they come from completelly different philosofies
@@taiyoqun Pe'ter teaches Hans how to get the most of a Hotshot Longlas. Hanz teaches him how to not die in CQB.
Josh: "Hans, you have to at least *try* and be nice."
Hans: "Would someone here kindly shoot me in the back of my fucking head?"
Josh: "Why are you such a downer all the time? We're light-years away from the front lines on a paradise world where there's barely any crime and all the comforts of civilian life."
Hans: "BY THE EMPEROR WOULD YOU STOP REMINDING ME!"
Trevor:How many times have I mentioned the mutants that look almost exactly like the mutants from back when I fought the bugs? The strange cults that keep popping up? The insects in the sewers?
Josh:Isn't that just the average imperium hive city
Hans and Trevor"By the emperor!"
Hans: Actually gets redeployed. (Anyone actually reading this, feel free to continue this)
"Trevor, the Commissar ordered a retreat while we were being shelled with artillery yesterday. Your experience makes you agreeable, do not be punctual for roll call tommorow."
- Hans
*nervous imperial sweating*
I mean I get the meme but Lasgun really rhymes and fits better here
Very nice profile picture ya got there.
"Oh and dont forget to tell Josh too. I like his foods."
Trevor: *HMM INTENSIFIES*
@@Odd_Krieger
Pe,ter:... is something wrong?
Trevor:...we need to stop hanz from killing the fucking commisar.
Pe,ter:why would that-...OH.
Later
Ciphas cain,rolling up:HEY HERETICS!
Heretics, looking confused at ciphas cain
Ciphas:hows your health plan?
Heretics, confused:...uh-
Ciphas:APARENTLY IT WAS GREAT!
cue what the fuck how did we win
One of these things is not like the others.
The only Emperor approved spot the difference
You're right: what's a Krieger doing with a bunch of Cadians? Really seems out of place.
@@Cirex9000 Must have been a clerical error, fear not. the scribe responsible and their entire bloodline shall be punished for such folly
Indeed, what's a fine lone Krieger doing in there ?
@@bgcvetan his platoon was recently deleted he is all that is left
In a few weeks Hanz will be the happiest man on that planet.
Probably the happiest anyone from Krieg has been in recent years
Why so?
@@syweb2 Because everyone else will be scared to death when the "three armed people" and the "monstrous insects" come out of the sewers or when the "space bugs" start eating every one while he will be fulfilling is live purpose, killing stuff.
Oh! there is an incoming dark elves invasion?
Thus why his finger always on the grenade
The squad finished their daily patrol
Josh: "alright, all we need is to report to the barracks."
Hanz: "I know a shortcut." Pointing at a trench line
Trevor: it better not be another trench?"
Hanz: "I made this for you!" Shouting at the squad
Pe'ter: "you mean you made it for us."
Josh: "we do have a paved walk way to the barracks."
Plot twist: they're all aware Pe'ter is a Tau. They let him join, because he thinks helping the Emperium would be for the greater good.
Some of his political ideology might be a little...odd, but he's got the right spirit so fuck it, we have a pet communist now
*-Hanz, at some point*
@@elysium7242 The German finally gets to make the Communist his bitch.
In fact it is. But the imperial aristocracy/burocracy are like noooooo, let's add another enemy to the list! Over a single planet let's start a war that will span thousands of years!
An allied empire that expands at snail speed while wiping out orks, tyranids, and is immune to chaos corruption, trades a lot and invents new weapons that our techpriests could comprehend with their help WHO WANTS THAT?!
@@Scarletraven87 they are filthy xenos, Cool xenos by xeno standarts.
@@juancarlos-uv4lh
What is the best possible thing for the Imperium?
That xenos fight each other.
How do you plan do obtain that?
We have 3 options:
1) caveman level strategy: lure them.forward, make them see each other, and hope they charge
2) renaissance level strategy: pay them to kill each other
3) globalization level strategy: pretend to be an ally and make them your puppet
What I advocate for is to use the brains that the emperor gave us.
Wake me up if you find that something I said is heretical. I'll sit here and wait for the inquisitor you'll denounce me to, to gib me a medal and kick you in dem nutz.
“The commissar is afraid of him for some reason.”
*Intense gas mask noises.*
*Grips shovel with malicious intent*
Recommendation: The all guardsmen party for a good representation of the imperial guard
I'll look into it!
@@56Scratch It's a wonderful read if you've got the time.
Afreemanornot and Tale Forge do great audio readings
@@56Scratch CloakandDaggerGaming(taleforge) has the entire series narrated, It's damm near audiobook quality. I have all the chapters on my phone as an audiobook.
@@ValdemarCamilo the tts version by Neckbeardia is wonderful too tbh
A Krieger on a Paradise World? That's worse than hell itself!
he just wanted his luxury Tropical vacation on Catachan
@@zekramnordran9526 like he would want to be there.The krieger would want a bayonet charge against some nids
Fucking hell i want to CHAAAAARGEEEEE!
The fresh air would be toxic him.
@@Connor.SG-1Ring Hanz: Why do you guys not have your masks on?
John: The air is clean here?
Hanz: THE AIR IS WHAT?!
"Tell me Pe'ter, what do you think of the Xeno race, that is the Tau?"
"The definition of their 'Greater Good' is undefined, and benefits only their oligarchy. Were they.. more receptive to the Emperor's will, they may have made good allies. Instead, they became enemies of the Imperium."
@@krel7160 "Uhuh, well, get back to your post with Hanz, we are expecting a very special guest. The Captain General of the Adeptus custodes, named Kitten. You and Hanz shall escort him even if he is more than capable of defending himself. Dismissed."
@@krel7160 The Emperor remember the days that he served in the federation
@@alphariusfuze8089 I get that refrence
@@tauempire1793 I don't. Care to explain it to an uncultured individual?
"The commisar is afraid of him for some reason" sums up the kriegs korps pretty well
I only just noticed that the Krieger's thumb is hooked into the pin of a grenade. Nice touch.
Most likely the reason the commissar's afraid. Well, of to visit the emperor.
He knows something about Pe'Ter that the others don't, and he's about to go tell the emperor all about it.
and that's why Pe'ter is terrified
Pe'Ter seems pretty sus to me.... damn eastern exchange students
lol i get that
You are a legend for that
Cmon man give him a break that nasty tyranid attack left him loosing a pinky and his nose!
Don't bully him, and definitely don't let him get Access to either some Amasec or a shotgun
Empire’s a big place.
Pe' Ter is a funny looking guy. Must be from some backwaters frontier world.
Eh, probably just diving in the funky mold mud
Probably an Abhuman of some type
Hanze: if mask is removed you find a young man in his mid twenties covered in a large assortment of scars. Has a bionic eye in his left socket with many enhancements a gift form a Tec priest he saved costing his eye, his regular eye is blue those I don't recommend staring at them as one is filled with a deep seated shame. Women who were in the room at the time have been trying to sleep with him since even a few nobles. Hanze is a good singer those he only sings when alone most of the time, there always sad and depressing.
(NOTE) NEVER PLAY A POKER WITH HANZE HE WILL NOT LOSE EVEN WHEN I CHEATED HE WON.
Damn you Hanz, how in the emperor you won that?!
Ahem, the emperor does not tolerate cheaters and even if you cheat a krieg will win it no matter what you milksop, play fair next time and ya might win against him
He's probably singing wo allen Straßen
@@akriegguardsman unlikely, wo allen Straßen includes the line "heir gibt es kein gewinn" which is too defeatist for any krieger to ever say.
although the general mood does fit, seeing as kriegers are descibed as sullen.
@@matthiuskoenig3378 i took a look at the lyrics and it matches perfectly its never too defeatests
Plot twist: the Krieger is a shovel xeno
Pe'ter is just a deformed human
Trevor is a tau
And Josh?
is a mutant tyranid
@@imperialguard9246 josh just josh really good at cooking
Three guardsmen walk into a bar
Josh: I'll take a beer if that's alright.
Trevor: whiskey.
Pe'ter: Some wine is good so I'll buy a round for everyone, that would be even greater
Hans: Werden Sie nicht wasserabhängig, es wird Sie ergreifen und Sie werden seine Abwesenheit ärgern!
Bartender: What did you say? Umm, hans?
@@tempsinger7418 "Do not become addicted to water. It will take hold of You, and You will resent it's absence"
Tell me that Isn't exactly the sort of thing a deathworlder would say XD
It's a sly reference to the film Mad Max Fury Road
@@VictorianTimeTraveler It would be a good saying on a Death World
Well actually Krieg has very little in common with german, about the only thing they have in common is the bottom and mid part of the helmet that looks like a stalhelm, the rest of the uniform is mostly inspired by WW1 french uniform and the gas mask is a WW2 allied variant, and I think the boots are ww1 german tho
@@sovietred7371 I'm aware of that, it's just a joke.
-Guys, is that a tau in your squad?
-Yes
-Purge him.
-that's not a tau, that's pe'ter.
Hans is probably the type of guy who would charge into the battlefield while blasting sabaton
leeeeeeeeeroy jeeeeeenkis
@@diobrando5746 no no, like this.
"Whats the priceee, of a mile?"
@@ConfusedGuardsman no no, its "Into the motherland the german armies march"
@@skitariiranger4346 alternatively "primoo victoriaaaa!*
@@ConfusedGuardsman true enough, but have you considered "Crazy madmen on a leash. Or young men who lost their way?"
Josh: Good cook
Angry voice in the distance: *P O I N T S*
We took the krieger to a therapy session. And learned he hasn't been able to clean his shovel in three to four weeks. He gave a very angry grunt towards one of our employees and...well he killed a potential heretic. All and all a pretty successful session in my opinion. I'll be getting him a new shovel with a sharper edge
Actually, Pe'ter is only seen without a bayonette because he, like many other guardsmen, lost it INSIDE of an enemy combatant. Happens all the time.
That Tau did a fatal mistake getting within the melee range of a Krieger
You talkin about Pe'ter, he's one of the greatest soldiers the imperiums got and you calling him a Tau!
@@faether1429 Exactly, now carry on Alpharius
@@therealchaosguy no im alpharius!
................ oh shi
@@clobble643 Quiet Omegon
The krieger is depressed because he's 20 and most kriegs die heroically by the time they're 15. He's an embarassment to the unit.
Hey Hanz, don’t tell anyone we’re from the same vital womb batch
Makes me think of a krieger who ends up being too good at combat and forever cursed to not be dead
@@dysn3961 me too. And the worst part, after each victory he gets more experienced, thus less likely to die.
@@tlotro625 Fights chaos because of how crazy they are, but ends up getting turned and , unfortunately, immortal
The last statement is false. Look at his gas mask.
HANS IS A FREAKING GRENADIER.
I would love to see the antics a group of Catachan would get up to on a paradise world...
I'm imagining something like Rambo X Real Housewives of Orange County.
they hide in the hedges and prepare an ambush for some Greenskins.
Lots of ptsd. When the action stops, the shit hits hardest.
They're not as battle-simp like Kriegers, so basically to Catachans, all planets outside of theirs are paradise.
@@SetuwoKecik No, they're like Kriegers in that every world outside of theirs is shit unless it's reduced to a hell resembling theirs. A catachan was disappointed when he killed a giant tyrannid (since he killed more dangerous / larger animals) and another was happy for living in an excessively dangerous world for the emperors sake.
Krieg loves it when the world is a massive trench network of attrition, radiation, and barb wire
Catachan love it when the world is a jungle with vast amounts of hyper-lethal monsters
*HANZ*
Jahwol?
*GET ZE FLAMER*
J a h w o l.
"Brother get the flamer. The heavy flamer"
@@56Scratch “i’m going to need two flamers for this heresy”
Happy *FIRE* cast noices.
i cant imagine how happy hanz would be when he heard that
"I am more disappointed then a Kriegs Corp member on a Paradise world" TTS verse, can not remember who pecisely.
Edit: according to @MiklosHubler below it was: "I am as let down as a Death Korps Guardsman on a Paradise world" - Papa Smurf (aka Marneus Augustus Calgar)
I thought it was the emperor himself who said it! Not 100% on that
Pretty sure it was Calgar/Papa Smurf
The Krieger probably thinks of this a punishment for not dying for the Big E
Calgar. The Smurf himself.
"I am as let down as a Death Korps Guardsman on a Paradise world" - Papa Smurf (aka Marneus Augustus Calgar)
*stares at Pe'Ter*
I've got my eyes on that potential heretic....
Sus
Baneblade on a nearby hill turns its main gun
"I sense filthy xenos nearby, are you seeing anything Pe'ter?"
-----Open:
Request form:
Requested presence: Ordo Hereticus or General Inquisitorial inquiry.
Issue: Suspicion of Heretical behavior or possible infiltrator presence within a Guard unit on a Paradise world.
Note: The possible Xeno/Heretical infiltrator goes by the name Pe’ter, and is embedded within the planet’s guard. Notable features include lack of a nose. A reprehension for Melee and Melee training. As well as this overwhelming sense of sharing as a part of his mentality. It is unconfirmed due to lack of investigation, but it is possible that this suspect could be Tau. Unless he is faithful to the emperor, or possible of being converted to the Ordo Xenos, then it is suggested that he is terminated and replaced.
------ Signatory--------
High Commissar Thorp,
Planetary Garrison Command
Posting #0198347652901-8810
Additional request--- Someone please either send me someone to train my Commisars to deal with Kriegers or get this mad bastard off my rock. I’ve looked at his forms, and while by Krieg standards his record is nothing short of disappointing, by mine he is a valuable asset that could be used more effectively in battle by NOT being stationed on a leisure Paradice world.
The Emperor Protects.
--------Nothing Follows--------
That Krieger is in hell! He's actually being fed enough for once!
Krieger: "I'd like to report an issue with our rations."
Commissar: "Oh, you never complain. What could be the matter with them?"
Krieger: "The rations far exceed daily nutritional requirements, are served at a disagreeable 65°C, and appear to have been poisoned with something the ration-distributor calls 'spices.' May I perform the execution?"
@@dans9097 Commisar: Ohh yeah..... You see, this is what a regular Citizen need to survive and spices are not poison, they are used to give more "taste" to the ration
@@kriegmans2344 "Taste?"
*Primes lasrifle*
@@dans9097 Commisar: wait... The world taste is not only used as "taste my bullet" but its a proprety of the food, people dont only want to have the nutrional value but also they want that the food feel good in their mouth
@@kriegmans2344 Feeling good? Being a devoted soldier in service to the Emperor isn't good enough for them, they need to become heretics and indulge in pleasure?!
*raises up Lasrifle*
Why does Trevor look unironically cool like bruh I want him as a model
"We all ignore him, since what could go wrong here ?"
Me: *FAMOUS LAST WORDS, BECAUSE EVERYTHING IS ABOUT TO GO HORRIBLY WRONG*
I love the fact that Linda is a guy
Well the Imperium is a very inclusive organisation, as long as you're not a filthy xeno of course.
@@56Scratch *sad Pe’ Ter noises*
@@56Scratch The Ordo hereticus would like to talk to you and the governor.
We just want to be safe that NO SLANNESHI CULTS are currently on the planet.
@@Loydthehighwayman 'Frantically deletes Fetlife account'
@@56Scratch ua-cam.com/video/8fwFojMn1dU/v-deo.html
I love how Hanz casually has his thumb in the pin of his Grenade, ready to pull at any time.
When you're Imperial guard and the Commisar is afraid of you, you know you're ready to die for the Emperor.
I like to imagine hanz just spends his time trying to teach pe'ter how to fight with melee weapons while pe'ter tries to work around the whole sacrifice mentality to explain that they are more useful to the greater imperium (greater good) if they don't die in the first 5 seconds of a battle
Trevor: If I removed that mask, would you die?
Hanz: It would be extremely painful...
Trevor: You're a big guy-
Hanz: *For you.*
Thats an All-Guardsman party, milord.
I like how hanz gives the wholesome thumbs up ready to pull out that grenade JUST IN CASE
I swear I see Tau in guardman cloth...
And I am depress that there was no Catachan in there.
Or Steel Legionnaires.
Sly Marbo is just hiding in plain sight
"The commissar is afraid of him for some reason." *Happy Shovel Noises*
Hanz: "commisar is afraid of him"
Me: Well hes gotta a good damn reason why to be afraid of him.
Did I just spot a Xeno among them? No? Might just be my imagination.
Amongst us : 40k edition
PURGE THE XENOS
That 'Josh' fella looks off to me, no true human has ears like that...
The real fun is 'Da Deffwotch' (a bunch of Orks wearing pieces of space marine armor and pretending to be deathwatch, because that way they get sent to all the nastiest fights)
@@akriegguardsman Yes and when you push the botton you drop a Exterminatus on your head, killing all players.
@@cavareenvius7886 that seems fun , dying
l smell a sitcom~, also what's with that Peter guy... did he get frostbite?
I want to watch that sitcom! And suspicions are arosed with Pe'ter, he may be a filthy Xeno...
@@56Scratch naw. He fell into a blue dye pit and got deformed. Affraid of melee due to a previous fight with a ork. I smell no xeno
Says the other Xeno...
Give Pe'ter a break
He recently lost his brother, Hugh Mahnn
@@MrJustonemorevoice LOL, nice!
this honestly feels like the setup for vermintide
"a dwarf with a secretive past, an elf veteran, a witch hunter with guilt, a shamed fire wizard, and the best the empire has to offer walk into the end of the world"
I would love to have a series about these gents
I think that the MI stands for 1001th, as Roman numbers.
Just to show how much silly and arrogant Imperium nobles are
or just how old the imperium is, i would expect 10 000 years of noble rule would result in a jean-Pierre the 1001th
One Thousand and Frith
Hanz: *heavy gasmasking sniffing*
*stares at commissar menacingly*
*proceeds to do daily shovel maintenance*
I mean he has a Cadian and a Krieger, what could go wrong?
Whos the Caidian?
@@Regular93 Trevor probably.
@@Regular93 Both Josh, Pe'ter and Trevor do work Cadian style body-armor. This type of uniform is not the standard of the Imperial Guard as a whole, even though it would be easy to think with it's wide spread representation.
@John Doe
I call Cadian the meet or beat standard for guardsmen.
A planet's troops need to perform as well as the Cadian style standard to keep their individually as an army. It allows the Imperal Guard to gain access to specialized troops without wasting resources.
@@Myuutsuu85
Cadian pattern armour and fatigues are widespread across the entire galaxy; its the closest thing the Guard got to a « standard » uniform; many PDFs uses similar gears as well
Its all because of Cadia being an icon in the Imperium; hell even Cadians battle doctrines and tactics are replicated in others worlds
With that said; I wonder if anyone tries to replicate Krieg’s style somewhere
*_So, guardsman, your name is Pe'ter, you say?_*
"Yes fellow humans, I mean friends, I mean..."
@@56Scratch Have prayed the God emperor, guardsman?
It's a regional dialect
I heard Tau had spies on this planet
Well.... That First time that a Commissar is afraid of an guardsmen... XD
Waaait Sec... is Pe'ter an Tau ? he got 4 fingers and have no nose ?
The Death Korps of Kreig have been known to execute their Commissars for cowardice. They weren't even cowards either the Death Korps are just so fanatic about the Emperor that they would do suicide charge after suicide charge. Hell the Commissar's job in the Death Korps is to make sure the Guardsmen don't get themselves all killed.
I KNEW there was some thing off about him! We'll report him to the commissar immediately
@@56Scratch No no no no. Report him to Kitten (from TTS). He'll probably kill him (because he hates tau) or ask him to ask Shadowsun to come back.
@@Regular93
Not a good idea.
Kitten: Tau? Tau? Tau?TAAAUUU!!!
Extermintus! Exteminatus! Exterminatus!
Wammu: YEESSS kill all the normies
Magnus: NOOOO dont destroy a whole Planet.
Acdc: Can we go on a date if i Help you hot Sauce Boy?
Emperor: Prohibitionhammer !
Boy: What is a Tau?
Kars: Shut up Boy
Boy: :(
Dorn: Boy the Tau are a Xeno Race.
Kars : I know that
well the emperor has been thinking to make an alliance with the farsight enclaves.
"we all ignore him, since what could go wrong here?" You've got a Death Korps of Krieg Grenadier...with a *NAME* ....whatever can go wrong, *it*will be very very sorry...
"The Commissar is afraid of him for some reason."
Me: "Noticing Hanz got finger on pin that release grenade firing sequence."
Also Me: "I see a reason clearly."
If All Guards Party ever finishes I want Sarge's team to run into these guys.
I just now noticed that Han’s has his thumb on that looks like a pulley system for a grenade? I’m confused
That's the grenade's pin he's toying with, like the total Krieg nutter he is. The germans used grenades like those, the pin was at the end of the long handle, which allowed them better leverage to throw it.
He is just suicidal, since he can't die on the battlefield.
the "potato masher" grenades he has had a twist off cap on the end, which protected the "pin" as we know it (the bit he's got his thumb on) which goes up a tube in the handle of the grenade itself and deploys the fuse inside the explosive portion on the end.
Took me 4 rewatches to realize that Peter was a tau
2 under motivated and 2 overly motivated soldiers. Perfectly balanced.
Poor Pe'ter
He just recently lost his friend, Hugh Mann
The interesting thing about the death corps of krieg is that they’re actually more inspired by the French WW1 soldiers. And honestly the French are way more terrifying than history memes make them out to be.
stick me in a room with ww2 french and polish fighters and i'd probably choose the polish. they did impressive feats with so little people and supplies. the french had the means to get supplies but the polish were smack in the middle of two fronts making any kind of aid or supply runs almost impossible. they tried twice and stopped after one partially successful and a completely failed attempt.
@@thatguybrody4819 for me, it's the Serbs
even on a paradise world, that krieger is going to find a reason to sacrifice for the emperor
Four guardsmen enter a bar.
The man wearing a gas mask was asked to leave, for the minimum age requirement was 16.
So we have a bog standard
A Tyra is veteran
Secret tau
And a krieger
This is gonna go well
seriously though: i want to read a comic series about these guys!!
I do too!
"Likely has PTSD"
In the deep darkness of the far future
Soldiers who fight endless wars likely have ptsd
Ptsd in my warhammer!? More likely than you think!
Two things
One. The kreigsmen scars the commisar that's fucking terrifying just thinking about it.
Two. that paradice world is going to be fortified as hell when hans is done.
15 minutes, a Kriegsman and a shovel? Best of luck to any Iron hands who drop by...
Josh: We got 2 hours till lunch so, LETS HAVE SOME FUN!!
Hanz: *confused gasmask noises*
Josh: Well.. Ummm. How do I put this.... What do you like doing?
Hanz:*gasmask noises*
Josh: The 1st one is a no go but I think I have the perfect idea for the second one.
10 minutes later
Josh: BEACH PARTY!!!
Trevor: Watch out of water bugs *shivers* they are some mean mother frackers
Pe'ter: I think I will stay on the beach what about you hanz... Hanz?
Hanz: *digging a trench line*
Pe'ter: On second thought the water looks very good
*1 hours and 30 minutes later*
Josh: Alright we got to go to lu- *falls into trench* ow
Trevor: Looks like hanz was busy with this tench... Looks a lot like my old one
Pe'ter: But where is hanz?
Hanz: *Currently digging command post*
Pe’ter: “What ho yellow Hoomans! I too enjoy eating starch and paying taxes!”
Pay close attention to hanz his thumbs up...
"The Commissar is afraid of him for some reason."
Hanz: **Has a Thumb inside the safety pin of his Grenade.**
“The commissar is afraid of him for some reason” haha
a man who survived the Tyranids is more then just a simple Veteran he has seen some SHIT
Based on the description, may even have been Genestealers involved. Now that will make anyone paranoid.
"Kommissar is affraid of him for some Reason" ;D
I just noticed Hanz with his thumb in the grenade pin. He's more than depressed, he's suicidal. And not in the Krieger manner.
that Pe'ter looks pretty sus, make him a example of being sus
The Commissar would, but Pe'ter is smart enough to stay just close enough to Hanz to scare off the Commissar, but far enough away to be out of shovel range just in case he can actually see colors well enough through that gas mask to tell he's blue.
The young kid, the guy who survived a geanstealer swarm, the Tau in disguise, and #3326386 from Krige
I can only read pe’ter the totally human guardsman’s name as lois.
Hans is the only Krieger who reach full adulthood
This Josh guy..... Seems quite familiar to a character I played in a rp server once... I’m concerned.
i love how all the guardsman regiments who aren't Kriegers are afraid of the Kriegers
"Hanz, get ze flamer."
"The Heavy. Flamer."
I love that hane is just straight up a person from krieg