This is from an outsider's perspective. It does not speak to the actual experience of autistic people. And criteria like these are precisely why women and girls go undiagnosed, because they are high maskers and better at the social aspects. That doesn't make their autism "milder"; it makes their lives more exhausting for having to mask all the time. Autism is MUCH more than this.
True, not trying to be sexist hear or whatever. But, I do thing woman tend to try to fit in, and socialize with others. I might not be autistic, but I feel as if it would be more exacerbated with Autism. By the way, I'm not autistic or have REALLY bonded with someone with autism, so I wouldn't know. Lastly, I hope didn't make autism geel like a disease, when it's not.
It is SO exhausting on every level. Many need a lot of 'alone time' just to recuperate and prepare anxiously for the next onslaught, then this need for solitude is often perceived as weird or unsocial etc.. sigh.
This is the issue with the current diagnostic system: I went my entire childhood (somehow) without being diagnosed and even today in a business setting I am commonly told that I don’t come across as autistic. This is because I’m too damn good at masking and, unfortunately, the diagnostic system commonly fails those autistic individuals who are very good at masking, often viewing them as neurotypical.
I also think it’s a dangerous precedent to set by a doctor coming out and saying you MUST meet all three of these requirements. Autism is a spectrum and this misinformation from what should be a trusted source is dangerous and can potentially stop undiagnosed autistic individuals from seeking a diagnosis due to not meeting the criteria that he mentions. And not to be pedantic, but I am autistic, I do not “have autism”.
I think if you are masking well enough people can’t even tell, then you have essentially faked it until you made it. You are high functioning enough that it is likely not negativity impacting your life enough a lot needs to be done about it. You were able to evolve and are functioning well enough through life, and of course we all have our struggles and quirks, even non autistic people.
Amen to that. Undiagnosed AuDHDer until my 30s. If I saw this dude, I'd still have no idea why I'm struggling in the ways that I am. Only multiple sessions with a qualified (diversely experienced) professional can produce an accurate diagnosis. Hence, why so many people on the Spectrum/NDs are going under the radar. I used to think you're only Autistic if you're a "Rain Man," or Sheldon Cooper. Once you've met one person on the Spectrum, you've met one person on the Spectrum.
@@evas5187Tell him to go get tested. You can’t say you might have something without really knowing for sure. He might just have simple ADHD and need an excuse for his awkward behavior and gestures. He might just be really awkward, seeking attention or it could just be social anxiety.
I'm all too familiar with that "glassy eyed look" when I've been talking too much/oversharing. (A sure fire way to tell if someone is ASD is to play Risk. LOL. Guaranteed melt down!)
Okay. I hate that he says "have to have all three". These are SIGNS, not CRITERIA. Autism so much more complicated than this, and most certainly not everyone struggles or lacks these abilities like he suggests. Personally, (have been diagnosed), facial expressions and tone of voice are actually things I do really well, though I do popbably exagerate them too much to make them easier for myself to understand. If you really had to have a criteria, sensory stuff would probably be a better indicator, but still, its just an indicator.
Right! It varies between people. Some people can have all these things but are just shy, or have social anxiety, depression, adhd etc.. the spectrum needs to be more accurate & concise because every single person has at least a couple of things that they swear up & down are traits of autism. They fail to recognise that autistic people have feelings too that people without autism have.
Autism in the medical community is still so understudied. There’s still so many biases against us because we aren’t cared enough about by society, so very few people care to try and understand us. I was almost not diagnosed with autism because I’m a “attractive” woman who has been in relationships, has friends, can carry a conversation (most of the time) and so forth. I’ve been dismissed and misdiagnosed my entire life, and still am, because most people are ignorant. Their idea of autism is a young, white boy who screams and flaps his hands constantly, when in reality it is such an individual experience. We are not our autism, we are still people with own our individual interests, traits, way of speaking, way of thinking…etc. There is a lot of work still that needs to be done to help autistic people and have more people accept us into society without stereotypical judgements or biases
Exactly, that's why it's called autism spectrum disorder. For me personally, I see it partially as a gift, to see the world from another perspective. Most people I know with autism are very smart, kind hearted individuals. They would do anything for their friends and family.
@@beckee6282the issue is wants many Hugh functioning are on the same diagnosis as those who are unable to speak don’t comprehend danger etc. It’s way to broad all thrown together
Actually people a morbidly overdignoused becuse this describes absolutely every single human being. I was diagnosed simply because I do have back and girth conversations but in my case it's because most people are idiot and I see eveone who is mot scientifically informed and politically neutral as inferior to my self and don't mine being even down right hurtful and never apologize in that case if criminal of unreasonable verpints ar expressed its nor that I'm I capable it simply contour attempt to dominate the conversation and keep the uniform inferior people from be able to speak ad I see the as incapable or unwilling to be contribute anything meaningful to the conversation at all. I also see everyone I. America right now who is not politically neutral nether left nor right as inherent idiotic and inharntly dangerous and idea from such people should not spreed so my thing is if you are incapable of rational thoughts you should never be allowed to speak
I'm like that too with the ADHD. I think the combo gives me very precise intuition but I often seem to lack the ability to hear or understand what it's trying to tell me, until after the fact.
I don't think I'm the one with the communication issue. I say exactly what I mean. It is not my fault that your brain scrambles the meaning of my words because it misinterprets my failure to emote as dishonesty. Wouldn't it make more sense to stop falling for fakeable indicators of honesty. We aren't all the same, maybe forcing us to pretend to understand the ever-changing rules of your pointless game isn't what's best for society. Maybe what's best for society is someone making your thought leaders justify their hatred of your neighbour.
You speak like a psychopath, not an autist. Easily confused for one another. You hit EVERY marker of psychopathy in that one, "Scar, Ursula, Cruella" satanic diatribe. FULL of arrogance and disdain which, frankly, mask hatred.
One thing that I’ve learned through working with people with autism, is that they prefer to be alone. And whenever I think I’m helping by encouraging them to be in a group! It’s actually causing more stress and anxiety to them!
That’s true for many. Others would like to have friends but aren’t sure how or sometimes they don’t like doing the kinds of things you have to do to have friends.
I find much solace in solitude. I'd like to be social and actually feel close to someone but it's all so f-ing difficult. I'm scared of everything and everyone! So I've given up and become a Crazy Cat Lady!
@@PsychologyWorksOfficialthis is so true! I enjoy being alone very much, but I do wish to make new friends. I just don't want to go somewhere I don't like to make them! I don't feel comfortable approaching new people, even it we are at a place of shared interest. However, that's pretty much the only time I will socialize, if I am somewhere that I know the people around me have a shared interest I can speak on. Otherwise I'm just super awkward bc who gaf about weather or politics? 😂 unless we are discussing meteorological patterns and the current trajectory of events, or how every political figure in recent history has been predetermined due to the fact that left and right don't matter anymore and blaming the president for the current state of affairs is useless because they have no real power anyway, what's happening around the world would be no matter if red or blue was in charge 😂 oops
The specific symptoms mentioned here are not only most definitely NOT universal (due to masking and other factors like the aforementioned symptoms simply not being present to begin with), but implying that someone MUST have these symptoms is incredibly outdated and, quite frankly, dangerous.
Thanks for sharing your perspective. These are the criteria from the latest version of the diagnostic manual. They could be wrong, but that's how it's written.
@DrGreenway: The book is just a guideline to help you recognize signs and symptoms, a place to start. What is the experience of your patient? Perhaps they make perfect eye contact and listen well from your perspective; but what has or does that cost them to perform? Compassion trumps any written word. Listen to your patients. When practitioners listen to their patients…they can improve the book.
Then what is autism for you? I've met many autistic people (my son is) and they're so different but they all share these things..just because you can mask it, it doesn't mean it's not there and a good professional should be able to recognise it anyway.
@PsychologyWorksOfficial as usual, not much research has been done to determine if the experience of women is different, and of course, it is. This is why psychology and counseling is largely ineffective for most people, because the industry has outdated. Embarrassing, really.
YEAS. I am a diagnosed, heavy masking adult female. I am very scilled masker, and on a good day, you really cannot tell. But when im tired or in sensory overload, the mask falls and then i might show these singns more. But really, this video is kinda false, it really depends.
I was diagnosed with autism when I was 31 because sadly the studies had done a bit done on men, and I’m now currently getting diagnosed with the ADHD as well as again. Apparently only men can have autism and ADHD until recently. Thank you so much Doctors of the past for screwing up my childhood, when I could’ve got the tools that I needed to fit into society and to also maximise what my strengths are.
I remember in the 80's writing out conversational talking points before I'd call someone on the phone. Including segways into humor all in order to just prevent that blank silent space from happening on the phone. Now I have zero care or concern what non aut's think about me good or bad. I exist in peace and equanimity in all relative space and time no matter what ❤
I remember doing that when I’d call a girl. Or even writing out a whole monologue to prepare for a discussion with my girlfriend in high school (also in the’80s). So glad we’re past that now.
I actually tell people that if I get quiet or go fiddle with something that it does not mean I'm wanting them to leave. I don't have to fill every moment with words when I'm with someone. Otherwise, when I get quiet or drop a conversation they're like, "Alright then....I'm going to get going. See you later Michael."
There has been at least one study done (that I know of) affirming that there is more difficulty in communication between allistic-autistic groups, while autistic-autistic groups communicate similarly effectively as allistic-allistic groups
My most recent lover turning friend is on the spectrum and he has been the most loyal friend who has shown up for me through the back to back unexpected loss of two cats. I couldn't ask for someone more present. He may not be around me as much as my needy extroverted self needs, but he calls and checks in or texts and knows I like being held when I'm going through death and offers to come over and hold me through the night even as we phase out from lovers to friends. He is consistent with what he says he will do and doesn't forget to check in when these deaths happened and has cried along with me. I've learned so much just watching how much he has shown up for me when I am going through this unexpected loss and I want to always be that kind of friend to him as well.
if you are a high masking individual (esp if you’re AFAB) you may experience these symptoms (and other signs of autism) on a more internalized level and may not even realize you’re masking. you may find yourself completely drained and burned out from simple small talk at work or regular conversations bc navigating those social interactions while trying to mask and follow proper social cues can be very exhausting and you may not even realize that you’ve been masking these issues for years. obviously anyone who thinks they may be struggling with these issues should consult with a professional, but if you watched this video and felt yourself despairing bc you don’t outwardly exhibit major signs of autism but feel that you struggle internally (or struggled A LOT when you were younger before you learned how to mask better) don’t lose all hope, you may just be a high masking individual w autism (speaking as a female who was recently diagnosed w autism in her 20s)
The diagnostic criteria are problematic - I was diagnosed Autistic as a child, I have issues with eye contact, back and forth conversation, I rock back and forth all the time, flap my hands, would line up toys, I struggle to approach people and have limited independence BUT I am very good at reading facial expressions and understanding tone of voice and I am very expressive. The rigid diagnostic criteria is why I almost wasn't diagnosed (half of specialists I saw said I was autistic and half said I was not) despite the fact that the traits I do have disable me and from the outside I do look quite stereotypically autistic in regards to my poor eye contact, rocking, and obsessive interests.
True keeping friendships going, currently in summer I am thinking if I could call my friend or not because we are getting farther and farther away. I can’t really make friends unless if people come up to me or act like me. I have been diagnosed with autism and I can say this is literally all true
Not diagnosed but I suspect that I am autistic. I am 33 years old have always had a hard time making and keeping friends. I have always had a hard time communicating to others and understanding sentences, tone, and facial expressions from those I was or am talking to. As this is still an issue I face. Social situations make me anxious and uncomfortable. I hate being forced to make small talk and am pretty dang bad at it too. I actively avoid social situations if I can help it. I need a lot of alone time or I get stressed out easily. Am a picky eater and tend to eat very few types of foods, as I always crave the same things over and over. I get stressed in loud, excessively bright and busy places. I have pretty strict daily routines that I follow, that cause me stress and irritation if they are disrupted. I get agitated/ overwhelmed easily as well. My hair tickling my face, my clothes being too tight or the fabric texture being itchy or uncomfortable. Or being too hot or cold can also cause me to be irritated very easily that I can lash out at people... I mean the list goes one and I could go into even greater depths with many of these points and really explain them😅 but I doubt anyones going to even read this long of a comment😅.
This may explain things. You might want to get a formal evaluation with someone who specializes in assessing adults for autism. You'd be surprised how many might read this.
I tick off all three boxes. But I have worked really hard at learning to adapt. I’m now really good at picking up body language and tones. Most everything else is really hard for me. But I am impressive with adapting as far as communication is concerned, verbal and non. Plus my son is non verbal, so there is a lot of practice with him.
I can understand a person better when they are explaining something to me much better when im not looking at them...its like i can hear them more clearly and visually see what they are trying to say in my mind. It just makes more since when i stare off into space when people talk to me...
@@ricardomontaguewhen i look at something basic i can focus on their words when i look at them i get distracted and think about their physical appearance. it feels super awkward to look at someone while their talking or while i am. i found out i was diagnosed high functioning at age 7 due to nonverbal but i was very active / i built a lot of cool things . It all came out at once when it did (my words) i was 18 when i really found this out. i was diagnosed again at 22. i manage to maintain many friends barely due to just being full of facts and insults. but am very introverted. very focused on what i like to do. i brush my teeth like 4 times a day, i have a strict diet. i get overloaded quickly with sounds and lights and people. at my family gatherings i spend more time in the bathroom or in my car. it’s not always easy , i do to much for others. but eye contact is something i’ve always struggled with according to others. if they can’t imagine i am listening that’s their fault. ears don’t have eyes. i am currently watching this and watching a movie while cooking and cleaning in my home alone that i own i’m 23. i will never sit down unless i’m sleeping or driving. at night i pull over sometimes and just hold my head because of all the lights. i’ve had a few seizures. Cannabis has helped more than anything with everything. but i quit. i get made of by waiters in restaurants alone for asking them to be more quiet or turn down the music but i typically just get free desert after telling a manager. I am good looking and physically fit and it’s hard for most people to tell, i scored a 135 and i am very good at holding conversations depending on how hard i try, but it’s obvious to people when i tell them about my condition, i have it.
Not me giving mixed signals to allistics through my expression, tone, and word combination and then my mom accusing me of being manipulative, deceitful, and abusive 💀
Just to clear this up, you do not “have to have all 3” my brother who was diagnosed with higher functioning autism after 4 years of waiting is actually really good with facial expressions and tones of voices. And although he’s not brilliant and finding friends he can be good at keeping those who are good to him. He is very good at masking it. And I have been waiting years of my life to be tested being told that it’s harder to find in women so I should just give up and not get tested. I always struggle to stay focused in social situations and to be honest, my facial expressions may not always be good, but for me the struggle is finding something that I like that others are actually interested in listening to. I’ve always not been social at all which resulted in the people i know and made friends with usually being because of my one close friend introducing me to others. But that’s just my experience I guess.
@@alies_mom Yes, though ASD manifests differently in each person and I think this might be where the confusion lays here, as he was using these as examples (indicated when he said "Things like", which literally means examples). I can get where their interpretation comes from, if you are taking it in a black and white manner. The point is that not everyone on the spectrum is going to have every single one of these.
The problem with social communication is I spent 30 years observing how other people behaved and mimicked them. I can follow the social rules, without actually understanding them just through repetition and learning from mistakes.
i’m not on the spectrum but i’m definitely a bit different from most others and introverted. in social situations, i’ve always gravitated towards ppl on the spectrum because i felt like we could be alone together if that makes sense ❤
I had a late diagnosis at the ripe old age of 68…yay. Made sense of my entire life and now it’s my badge of honour. I live my life authenticity now and I’ve never been happier. The truth shall set you free… wahooo 🎉
I am 65 years old. So many diagnoses that fit for me but all require healing time and work which I have been happily doing as it gives me that better understanding of myself and also my daughter who was just diagnosed at age 27. She definitely fit with having some autistic traits that I did not see because of the blind spot in myself. We are growing and learning together. Through her I am learning much and she has opened herself to understanding so much of our common “mother” experiences. Both have definite ADHD traits too. It is freeing!!
This comment made me 🥲. It makes me hopeful for myself. I’m still going through testing, but I feel strongly I am. I already feel more free and I’m allowing myself to just be me for really the first time in my life.
I hear that a lot. I'm not sure why so many people diagnosed with autism say that they don't evidence the symptoms that define the disorder in the DSM-5. Possibly in the next edition, they will describe the symptoms differently.
@@PsychologyWorksOfficialbecause struggling with communication and being able to communicate aren’t the same thing. an individual can communicate really clearly and understand communication really well and still fit these criteria’s because of the comparative amount of energy and effort this takes. an allistic person can do all these things with ease compared to autistic individuals. this doesn’t mean autistic people can’t necessarily do these thing. it just means it’s harder for us /takes more energy and that’s why for us it’s masking. it’s can be hard to tell when someone with autism is masking and so we often go undiagnosed. however some of us get lucky and are diagnosed by people who understand masking. this is why there are people diagnosed with autism who say they don’t fit these criteria.
also an important note is that this all considers how autistic people interact with allistic people or neurotypical people. my interactions with other autistic or neurodiverse people generally do not face the same barriers of communication and energy that my communication with neurotypical people takes.
I hope one day the most updated information on autism will be more known by the Drs talking about it. Being measured by actions is a very poor indicator for whether someone has autism or not. For high functioning people, ask questions that tell you the processes of that persons mind. Im very good at social performance but its not through the same path as a neurotypical person. I purposely studied communication characteristics and memorized them. Obsession with a topic, retaining facts, pattern recognition. All autistic reasons I was able to reach a good enough communication ability rather than the neurotypical way of simply absorbing tactics used in their environment as a survival instinct. The brains of autistics work fundamentally differently from neurotypicals and though one of the main impacts is always going to be on social interaction, it isnt entirely uncommon for our ability to communicate to appear to not differ enough at first glace to warrant a deeper look. But if anyone had the sense to look deeper given the scientific fact that autism is an internal difference not an external one then they would find that something presenting as "normal" is a result of a completely not "normal" process attempting to mimic neurotypical behavoir and will never be quite the same. I can distract people from seeing how strange I am with information, over performing body language, facial expressions, understanding banter and jokes, but if I let go of consiously doing those things I instantly fall short of appearing normal. In fact if I am in an environment not conducive to intensly entertaining someone ie drs office, bank, meeting, it is clear that I am odd and I dont know how to fix it without all my entertainment distractions. But the ways that Im odd dont include not being able to read people or keep eye contact. Its something else that obviously I dont know otherwise Id fix it lol.
I have been diagnosed with autism and I don't generally have any issues with communication. It's rare that I don't pick up on social cues or find difficulty in approaching people. To me, autism isn't cut and dried in this way or clearly I wouldn't have been diagnosed. You talk about 3 areas of focus and mention communication and friendships. What is the third?
I hate it when people say, when talking about autism, the words all, or none. It’s just a generalization, and unless people can understand that not all autistic people are the same, they will be treated even worse than normal.
Sorry, this video got cut off. Number 1 is all about different types of social aspects of autism spectrum disorder. Number 2 would be about repetitive or restricted patterns of behavior and interests, which is discussed in the longer video version of this.
I am autistic. I was diagnosed at 28. I spent so much time learning to communicate and speak, and how to have “normal” social interactions, that I feel like I wouldn’t “meet” the requirements for the social interactions criteria now. But I did and have been figuring stuff out from the lens of being a late diagnosis autistic person. It’s helped me coach my oldest daughter who is also autistic.
Hello! I was diagnosed as autistic at a young age but I barely have any symptoms. I’m not monotone, I’m very expressive, chatty, not super sensitive to loud sounds, I understand social cues, I can make eye contact, I’m funny, and I’m very empathetic. Also I do NOT mask autism symptoms. Was I misdiagnosed? I need a second opinion?
I'm Autistic all this is all me, except I do have sensory issues. This video is an Allistic perspective of us and the criteria stopped me from seeking diagnosis for a long time as it doesn't accurately describe Autism
Yeas they are but you do not have to have all of these to get the diagnosis, you are listing examples in where it can show. Im a diagnosed adult and i have very good conversation skills and i also pick up nonverbal messages very well, allthough sometimes i have difficulty in these areas also.
If you were diagnosed as a kid, it could mean you had the signs as a kid, but you "got better" as you grew up. I was diagnosed with Aspergers as a kid, but as I grew up, most of the symptoms went away or became milder. Most people i know think I'm a simply a normal person who just happens to be introverted and a bit awkward.
@@esh9x153 just a question from someone diagnosed with aspergers at 14 who constantly questions whether they have autism or not, would you still consider yourself autistic? I think I would but the way I can handle myself in social situations leads me to doubt I ever had autism in the first place.
Thank you I was kind of interested in see if I was autistic...but I am very extrovert and have literally none of the issues described here. Maybe I am just an asshole 😂
30%-80% of people with autism also have adhd, which causes them to be this way. I’m one of those people. The extroverted autistic. When the dopamine is satisfied, I have 0 desire to talk to others.
This video is so flawed and outdated, based on a lot of stereo typical misconceptions. Also its common to have a dual diagnosis of ADHD. Whilst you may have some of the introvert tendancies of some Autistic's, you may well crave the going out, meeting folk, new experiences etc. These can fuel the adrenalin that you use to replicate the dopamine. Its also worth noting that wether this applies to you or not, you may still be an asshole.
I responded somewhere else that i think struggling with communication and being able to communicate aren’t the same thing. an individual can communicate really clearly and understand communication really well and still fit these criteria’s because of the comparative amount of energy and effort this takes. an allistic person can do all these things with ease compared to autistic individuals. this doesn’t mean autistic people can’t necessarily do these thing. it just means it’s harder for us /takes more energy and that’s why for us it’s masking. it’s can be hard to tell when someone with autism is masking and so we often go undiagnosed. however some of us get lucky and are diagnosed by people who understand masking. this is why there are people diagnosed with autism who say they don’t fit these criteria.
Just to add: It may not nessisarily be difficulty with social interactions; It can be a diffrent communication pattern and not eveyone whom is diagonsed with ASD struggle with social interactions while some do, as ots a spectrum. And we can understand friendahip, i get its a wording choice, but it comes off as 'All autisitc people cant understand friendship or social cues." (I cpuld be phrased like "A lot of Autisitic people have deficits in understanding certain social cues, and this can fluctuate within a person aswell). When you meet one autistic person, Youve met one autistic person. (Oh, and we do care about iniciaiting interactions, we just often are to anixois) I also wpuld like to point out that a lot of autistic pople have truma, and therefore the truma can also influence social interactions and friend ships.
Its hard to know when youre masking so much, it puts you into a state of denial. My mom was telling me stories of when i was little and the stars have aligned
I wish someone would tell me these friendship rules. Like, they act like they want to be friends then when I ask if they want to meet and eat or have a drink they act shocked. Like, you were giving me the lets be friends vibe by telling me we should go out sometimes then act shocked when I ask when.......
I saw the hat man in my sisters old house that was haunted. Her friends saw it too. I suffered from health issues like chronic fatigue afterwards and she would argue with me. Toys would start going off on their own in the middle of the night. The only room it stayed out of was my neices room so i slept on the floor in there. That made me think kids have a natural protection
It is called a guardian angel, and yes, there is one for every baby. They may at times be up against too much opposition to protect a kid from really bad things. That doesn't mean they don't exist, and protect our kids from a lot.
social cues are signals expressed indirectly (not in words). this could mean through tone of voice, facial expressions, body language, etc. being unable to read cues could mean misinterpreting the mood of a circumstance and being unable to “read the room.”
as someone with autism, you're not correct Dr scott. I am a registered behavioral technician and an adult diagnosed clinically with aspergers when I was 11. I have since learned to mimic body language, hand gestures and tone (though its hit or miss and may appear awkward most of the time) I also have studied facial expressions and some sarcastic scripts and otherwise have been able to understand body language and facial expressions via logically and objectively looking for the requirements in their face rather than subjectively feeling it like neurotypical people do. I initiate conversation and enjoy talking. I have no issue with back and forth. Some of us have autism but have learned scripting and masking to be covert hence its not possible to always just look at someone and know if they have autism as an adult.
@@PsychologyWorksOfficial I would simply say there isn't one way to detect autism especially in adults. Our society has gone way too far diagnosing every single thing as autism so I understand the need to have good framework. As far as the continuing education thing goes, masking is one of the core components of adult autism. People used to think decades ago that people grow out of autism, but rather a lot of people simply learn what evokes the lesser reaction when in public or 1 on 1 conversation. Thank you for your response though!
If I'm diagnosed with Autism will it make my life better or worse? I feel that after getting diagnosed with ADHD my life got worse. I began blaming things on my ADHD instead of actually doing something about it. I'm medicated, but that seems to do nothing. I'm about the same as I ever have been except I can't get any of my chores done or find a job- not that I want one.
I have autism and yes some of the points he said are common the way they are explained makes autistic people sound completely different from how they act
Don't worry as introverts it's totally normal to have these qualities, I for example am really weird when meetng new people but am very jovial and ecstatic meeting with my old friends.
Yea same. Idk if I’m just an introvert with social anxiety disorder or if it’s autism cause I’m pretty awkward too, it’s just that I hold back often to not appear too different. I think I might just be an introvert too.
One of my twins is not even 1 and I am fairly sure based on what is said here that he is on the spectrum. I want the best for him and hope he can navigate life with our help well. I have met other people with autism and I have seen how challenging life can be for them and how out of touch they are often are with the perceptions of others.
From what I'm learning on YT, this information seems to be very outdated, especially for females. What are the other 2 things? Also, you only explained the first of your three things. This explains the external type, not necessarily the internal type.
While the socializing component of ASD is quite common, another common trait of autistic people is their sensory profile. that varies depending on the persons hypo or hyper sensitivities.
I have experienced fluctuating levels of sensory sensitivity, depending how stressed I am, how close to burnout. I have a young nephew who appears to be far more hyposensitive. To the point he thought my reactions of pain were funny when he rammed my legs at top speed with his tricycle, or used a loud bicycle horn.
😢 I could not escape the situation. My nephew needed to be baby sat every weekday, and I was expected to do it, no matter how I felt. I was then rooming with my brother's family, so watching kid from am to suppertime was repaying my "debt" to them.
My parents were sure I had autism growing up, now that I'm an adult I too believe I'm on the spectrum... We were never able to afford an assessment. I'm hoping in the near future I can take an evaluation to finally know more about this part of me
I don't recall the exact percent, but the estimated number of people with autism is a lot lower than 20%, probably even less than 10%. There are people who spend years on studies trying to estimate it, and they get different answers based on how they go about it. Usually they get in contact with clinics and find out what percent of their patient's are diagnosed with autism and then do statistical calculations to arrive at an estimate.
Ok i realized something. I always had bad thoughts that i'm a bad person because i can't feel bad for some people even my closest people. People i love. I really feel bad when i can't understand why.
The reason you avoid eye contact is not see body language you can't deal with. People are fake but don't want you to see it. They want you to take a hint but don't think bad of them. I am telling something. The other person is bored. I stop talking. The other person immediately asks, why did you stop talking? Or continue their monologue because it's okay for them to hoard all the attention. In friendship or even family you can walk away. But what do you do when your doctor or therapist looks bored out of their mind? Get another doctor you say. Really? You think your medical file is for you? Your medical file is their CYA.
I think you mean to include the phrase "appear to" or "seem to nonautistic people like," because there are some autistic people (especially highly functioning ones) who think they have no problems with this. However, if you ask other (nonautistic) people about the person, they will probably say stuff like, "that person is a big jerk, doesn't think about anyone but themself," but the autistic person doesn't notice this or perceive themself this way.
I think along with not recognizing certain cues, it's more like I recognize the cues somewhat after consciously observing.. but I also notice subtle throw offs.
Many psychologists don't specialize in diagnosing autism, but a psychologist in your area might be able point you or your daughter in the right direction if she is interested in getting a formal diagnosis.
I get some are non-speaking, but I love and appreciate my way and other autistic people's way of communication. I don't have it, it's apart of who I am. I wish there was a way to root out bigotry from people that practice psychology.
Anyone else have issues with embarrassment of others hearing your conversation in public? At work i feel really awkward talking to someone from a distance. I also have a quiet voice so often times if i try to talk to someone from 10 meters away they wont hear me.
Hmm. Wentworth Miller, Anthony Hopkins and Daryl Hannah aren't autistic then? I worked with kids on the spectrum, both high functioning and then some with more complex needs......and NONE of this applies. Not everyone is the rain man, or some quiet savant ( male) who loves trains.
“Difficulties starting friendships, keeping friendships going”… Damn, that’s a big one for me. The whole thing about autism is it causes social difficulties, so I question why people who have a lot of friends/long term friends think they might be autistic.
How can you tell the difference between someone with autism and someone who hasn't been properly socialized as a child? (Someone who was homeschooled, for example, and didn't have a lot experience interacting with peers from a young age.)
Good point. You'd have to take all that into consideration when making a diagnosis. A clinician should just go by these criteria but other psycho-social factors.
Losing people u thought where friends with no given explanation- but probably cos they thought you where rude because you didn’t understand all the social rules. Good that there’s lots of us autistic folk who can befriend each other and understand we’re not like them. Some may have learned pretty well to mask and fit in.. but we still miss stuff or over express social things. My dad taught me eye contact and greetings and hand shaking - then I went out and started like a crazy person and said hello how are you really over expressed and shook their hand like a man (cos my dad was a man and taught me his way) and I’d say that I was fantastic cos my dad was always such a positive person. Ahhh so so many other autistic sign memories do I have from my childhood, teens until now 😅😂
I am high functioning. After I turned 18 or so I started understanding a lot more about facial expressions and tones of voice. People have a hard time understanding my voice expressions tho. I’m always labeled as being sarcastic when really I’m being serious. I still have trouble talking fluent but that will probably last my lifetime.
I have to add that often we care about deeper topics than your average person (or getting more in depth) so we find allistics boring and they find us boring. But, they are the majority so we are perceived as the weird and less than minority. Living on this planet as an Autist can be quite disabling too
I was diagnosed with level2 autism. I do have a non autistic friend. He is a half legal guardian of mine . And he is 20 years younger. He comes a lot and stays.
I have noticed recently that I am terrible at noticing social skills, and also I approach people in really awkward ways, I do things that I don’t realize are “not proper” and also I embarked myself a lot and I just don’t understand a lot of rules, or basic manners, can anyone help me out?
As someone who wasn't diagnosed with "Asperger's" until their late 30s all of my past relationships failed until I married my second husband, who is also high functioning (savant with a high IQ). His is more noticable while I've been able to find coping skills to mask mine. Yet,we somehow balance each other out. Is this common, or do individuals on the spectrum usually end up with neurotypical individuals?
I'm not sure of the actual statistics, but in my practice, it does seem that people with autistic tendencies maintain relationships with others with autistic tendencies. I think they have different expectations of each other that work, compared to the expectations of neurotypical individuals.
These are all true for me. I grew up with good parents, under good circumstances so i never really understood where my problem with social things comes from. It's the number one thing that creates problems for me. I'm not diagnosed but it crosses my mind that i have autism and at this point, i wish i had a diagnosis of autism because nothing else could explain why tf i struggle so much with "simple" things like that
Like literally I can't approach people in a normal manner. I come across either too indifferent or "too much" (the latter when I'm excited to talk to the person). I have zero interest in most people and what they talk about, and I don't know how to maintain friendships. What it's appropriate to suggest, what is not etc. And at this point, I can't even blame it on my lack of experience. I'm 22, in university, have met a bunch of new people, had a bunch of experiences i never thought I would have, and I'm still clueless
this is literally me. i learned how to mask and hide myself to fit in and not seem "weird" but i feel that i still come off as weird and have never been able to keep friendships :(
For me, it’s just the fact I don’t like predictable small talk. I get bored easily and I’m an introvert so reciprocating convo with people who small talk at some point gets old.
I dont have autism, and I admit that I had at a young age. I want to prove a point to everyone that I can do everything by myself and not let all these traits tell me that I can't since I'm on the low "spectrum". But right now I'm getting my life together due to all of the traumatic times I had to deal with my family due to my disability. I just want to prove a point that one day I will be living by myself and doing things independently and not let anyone help me through my day to day life. Especially my over exaggerated family. I bet my own family never wanted me around because of me being different from everyone.
Ive lived my whole life not knowing im autistic until recently. I used to be able to mask pretty well but now im 58 im really struggling and its getting harder to maintain friendships.
me realizing I'm autistic not sigma giga Chad Patrick bateman Ryan gosling
Thanks for the comment.
@@PsychologyWorksOfficialthanks for the dry response.
Relatable
@@sigma_borat7157 Real
When people think I’m autistic and gay instead of cool and mysterious 😔
I'm masking so much that nobody believes I'm autistic
Same.
Same dude!!
I finally got diagnosed and I have friends and family member that don’t believe me or go “you’re not REALLY autistic” 😒 frustrating asf
I act out my own emotions by habit, It's conscience, But I forget not to.
Unmasking is so relieving, even if it's only a little bit. Try it some time.
This is from an outsider's perspective. It does not speak to the actual experience of autistic people. And criteria like these are precisely why women and girls go undiagnosed, because they are high maskers and better at the social aspects. That doesn't make their autism "milder"; it makes their lives more exhausting for having to mask all the time. Autism is MUCH more than this.
This is a good point. More research is being done all the time. Figuring it out is definitely an ongoing process. Thank you for pointing this out.
True, not trying to be sexist hear or whatever. But, I do thing woman tend to try to fit in, and socialize with others. I might not be autistic, but I feel as if it would be more exacerbated with Autism. By the way, I'm not autistic or have REALLY bonded with someone with autism, so I wouldn't know. Lastly, I hope didn't make autism geel like a disease, when it's not.
@@PsychologyWorksOfficialagreed
It is SO exhausting on every level. Many need a lot of 'alone time' just to recuperate and prepare anxiously for the next onslaught, then this need for solitude is often perceived as weird or unsocial etc.. sigh.
That's why I don't really relate 😮
This is the issue with the current diagnostic system: I went my entire childhood (somehow) without being diagnosed and even today in a business setting I am commonly told that I don’t come across as autistic. This is because I’m too damn good at masking and, unfortunately, the diagnostic system commonly fails those autistic individuals who are very good at masking, often viewing them as neurotypical.
I also think it’s a dangerous precedent to set by a doctor coming out and saying you MUST meet all three of these requirements. Autism is a spectrum and this misinformation from what should be a trusted source is dangerous and can potentially stop undiagnosed autistic individuals from seeking a diagnosis due to not meeting the criteria that he mentions. And not to be pedantic, but I am autistic, I do not “have autism”.
I think if you are masking well enough people can’t even tell, then you have essentially faked it until you made it. You are high functioning enough that it is likely not negativity impacting your life enough a lot needs to be done about it. You were able to evolve and are functioning well enough through life, and of course we all have our struggles and quirks, even non autistic people.
Amen to that. Undiagnosed AuDHDer until my 30s. If I saw this dude, I'd still have no idea why I'm struggling in the ways that I am. Only multiple sessions with a qualified (diversely experienced) professional can produce an accurate diagnosis. Hence, why so many people on the Spectrum/NDs are going under the radar. I used to think you're only Autistic if you're a "Rain Man," or Sheldon Cooper. Once you've met one person on the Spectrum, you've met one person on the Spectrum.
Everyone has autism now-it’s extremely over diagnosed.
@@iwo612 I recommend you educate yourself on the subject before making yourself look more of a clown.
Keeping a conversation that interests my peers is where i struggle.
@@evas5187Tell him to go get tested. You can’t say you might have something without really knowing for sure. He might just have simple ADHD and need an excuse for his awkward behavior and gestures. He might just be really awkward, seeking attention or it could just be social anxiety.
That doesn't mean you're autistic 😂 Jesus...
Mu trick for conversation lull is to get the other person to talk about themselves
@@fullyfb3847you don't know dude. they phrased it as one of many things they struggle with, not just the only one
I'm all too familiar with that "glassy eyed look" when I've been talking too much/oversharing. (A sure fire way to tell if someone is ASD is to play Risk. LOL. Guaranteed melt down!)
Okay. I hate that he says "have to have all three". These are SIGNS, not CRITERIA. Autism so much more complicated than this, and most certainly not everyone struggles or lacks these abilities like he suggests. Personally, (have been diagnosed), facial expressions and tone of voice are actually things I do really well, though I do popbably exagerate them too much to make them easier for myself to understand. If you really had to have a criteria, sensory stuff would probably be a better indicator, but still, its just an indicator.
Right! It varies between people. Some people can have all these things but are just shy, or have social anxiety, depression, adhd etc.. the spectrum needs to be more accurate & concise because every single person has at least a couple of things that they swear up & down are traits of autism. They fail to recognise that autistic people have feelings too that people without autism have.
Autism in the medical community is still so understudied. There’s still so many biases against us because we aren’t cared enough about by society, so very few people care to try and understand us. I was almost not diagnosed with autism because I’m a “attractive” woman who has been in relationships, has friends, can carry a conversation (most of the time) and so forth. I’ve been dismissed and misdiagnosed my entire life, and still am, because most people are ignorant. Their idea of autism is a young, white boy who screams and flaps his hands constantly, when in reality it is such an individual experience. We are not our autism, we are still people with own our individual interests, traits, way of speaking, way of thinking…etc. There is a lot of work still that needs to be done to help autistic people and have more people accept us into society without stereotypical judgements or biases
Exactly, that's why it's called autism spectrum disorder.
For me personally, I see it partially as a gift, to see the world from another perspective.
Most people I know with autism are very smart, kind hearted individuals. They would do anything for their friends and family.
@@XxElJefe go back 10 years and autism was demanded to be broad like this and all of us saying it needs to stop being this broad were attacked
@@beckee6282the issue is wants many Hugh functioning are on the same diagnosis as those who are unable to speak don’t comprehend danger etc. It’s way to broad all thrown together
And this is why so many people go undiagnosed 🤦🏻♀️
THIS
EXACTLY! I’m Getting Tested By March 2025 (ISTG If I Get Taken To Autism Speaks I Will Legit Try Not To Go Inside Cause ITS F(EEP)ING AUTISM SPEAKS.)
Exactly
Or just shitty, neglectful parents and now you have to handle it yourself.
Kinda like me.
Actually people a morbidly overdignoused becuse this describes absolutely every single human being. I was diagnosed simply because I do have back and girth conversations but in my case it's because most people are idiot and I see eveone who is mot scientifically informed and politically neutral as inferior to my self and don't mine being even down right hurtful and never apologize in that case if criminal of unreasonable verpints ar expressed its nor that I'm I capable it simply contour attempt to dominate the conversation and keep the uniform inferior people from be able to speak ad I see the as incapable or unwilling to be contribute anything meaningful to the conversation at all. I also see everyone I. America right now who is not politically neutral nether left nor right as inherent idiotic and inharntly dangerous and idea from such people should not spreed so my thing is if you are incapable of rational thoughts you should never be allowed to speak
True for me, but I also have ADHD and I think this combo gives me a very keen eye on reading people, I absorb their energy.
🙄 love your victim labels, huh?
@@Texasgirlinacrazyworld victim labels? Because of my disability 😂 wow
@@Texasgirlinacrazyworld You should like a good ol Christian woman. 😂
I'm like that too with the ADHD. I think the combo gives me very precise intuition but I often seem to lack the ability to hear or understand what it's trying to tell me, until after the fact.
@@Texasgirlinacrazyworldyou sound charming. Maybe you should learn some empathy and manners
I don't think I'm the one with the communication issue. I say exactly what I mean. It is not my fault that your brain scrambles the meaning of my words because it misinterprets my failure to emote as dishonesty. Wouldn't it make more sense to stop falling for fakeable indicators of honesty. We aren't all the same, maybe forcing us to pretend to understand the ever-changing rules of your pointless game isn't what's best for society. Maybe what's best for society is someone making your thought leaders justify their hatred of your neighbour.
Oh yes.. so many people think I'm a liar when I'm incapable of deceit, for the reasons you say! The fault is theirs, not ours. Liars expect lies.
You speak like a psychopath, not an autist. Easily confused for one another.
You hit EVERY marker of psychopathy in that one, "Scar, Ursula, Cruella" satanic diatribe. FULL of arrogance and disdain which, frankly, mask hatred.
@@JosieWard-su7rxliars and people who’ve been lied to too many times expect lies***
One thing that I’ve learned through working with people with autism, is that they prefer to be alone. And whenever I think I’m helping by encouraging them to be in a group! It’s actually causing more stress and anxiety to them!
That’s true for many. Others would like to have friends but aren’t sure how or sometimes they don’t like doing the kinds of things you have to do to have friends.
I find much solace in solitude. I'd like to be social and actually feel close to someone but it's all so f-ing difficult. I'm scared of everything and everyone! So I've given up and become a Crazy Cat Lady!
As an autistic person, can confirm. Let me do my thing, you can do yours, everyone’s happy lol
people put a limit on ya
@@PsychologyWorksOfficialthis is so true! I enjoy being alone very much, but I do wish to make new friends. I just don't want to go somewhere I don't like to make them! I don't feel comfortable approaching new people, even it we are at a place of shared interest. However, that's pretty much the only time I will socialize, if I am somewhere that I know the people around me have a shared interest I can speak on. Otherwise I'm just super awkward bc who gaf about weather or politics? 😂 unless we are discussing meteorological patterns and the current trajectory of events, or how every political figure in recent history has been predetermined due to the fact that left and right don't matter anymore and blaming the president for the current state of affairs is useless because they have no real power anyway, what's happening around the world would be no matter if red or blue was in charge 😂 oops
The specific symptoms mentioned here are not only most definitely NOT universal (due to masking and other factors like the aforementioned symptoms simply not being present to begin with), but implying that someone MUST have these symptoms is incredibly outdated and, quite frankly, dangerous.
Thanks for sharing your perspective. These are the criteria from the latest version of the diagnostic manual. They could be wrong, but that's how it's written.
@DrGreenway: The book is just a guideline to help you recognize signs and symptoms, a place to start. What is the experience of your patient? Perhaps they make perfect eye contact and listen well from your perspective; but what has or does that cost them to perform? Compassion trumps any written word. Listen to your patients.
When practitioners listen to their patients…they can improve the book.
Then what is autism for you? I've met many autistic people (my son is) and they're so different but they all share these things..just because you can mask it, it doesn't mean it's not there and a good professional should be able to recognise it anyway.
@PsychologyWorksOfficial as usual, not much research has been done to determine if the experience of women is different, and of course, it is. This is why psychology and counseling is largely ineffective for most people, because the industry has outdated. Embarrassing, really.
Could masking affect not doing these things?
Yes if you’re a heavy masker definitely effects that people often forget some of us can mask😢
"I'm not a man of too many faces.
The mask I wear is one."
YEAS. I am a diagnosed, heavy masking adult female. I am very scilled masker, and on a good day, you really cannot tell. But when im tired or in sensory overload, the mask falls and then i might show these singns more.
But really, this video is kinda false, it really depends.
Yes, highmasking people learn to read faces, also we can have too much empathy, so...
I agree with you 100% @@mina.458
I was diagnosed with autism when I was 31 because sadly the studies had done a bit done on men, and I’m now currently getting diagnosed with the ADHD as well as again. Apparently only men can have autism and ADHD until recently. Thank you so much Doctors of the past for screwing up my childhood, when I could’ve got the tools that I needed to fit into society and to also maximise what my strengths are.
Plenty of females were diagnosed. By saying this it is erasing the stories of tens-hundreds of thousands of girls who DID get a diagnosis.
Women gave Autism too
I remember in the 80's writing out conversational talking points before I'd call someone on the phone. Including segways into humor all in order to just prevent that blank silent space from happening on the phone. Now I have zero care or concern what non aut's think about me good or bad. I exist in peace and equanimity in all relative space and time no matter what ❤
I remember doing that when I’d call a girl. Or even writing out a whole monologue to prepare for a discussion with my girlfriend in high school (also in the’80s). So glad we’re past that now.
I would do that. But they would never follow the script...
I actually tell people that if I get quiet or go fiddle with something that it does not mean I'm wanting them to leave. I don't have to fill every moment with words when I'm with someone. Otherwise, when I get quiet or drop a conversation they're like, "Alright then....I'm going to get going. See you later Michael."
There has been at least one study done (that I know of) affirming that there is more difficulty in communication between allistic-autistic groups, while autistic-autistic groups communicate similarly effectively as allistic-allistic groups
My most recent lover turning friend is on the spectrum and he has been the most loyal friend who has shown up for me through the back to back unexpected loss of two cats. I couldn't ask for someone more present. He may not be around me as much as my needy extroverted self needs, but he calls and checks in or texts and knows I like being held when I'm going through death and offers to come over and hold me through the night even as we phase out from lovers to friends. He is consistent with what he says he will do and doesn't forget to check in when these deaths happened and has cried along with me. I've learned so much just watching how much he has shown up for me when I am going through this unexpected loss and I want to always be that kind of friend to him as well.
Everyone should have a friend like that. Thanks for sharing this story!
Gosh with a connection like that understanding and loyalty why the hell would you just want to be friends for real.
if you are a high masking individual (esp if you’re AFAB) you may experience these symptoms (and other signs of autism) on a more internalized level and may not even realize you’re masking. you may find yourself completely drained and burned out from simple small talk at work or regular conversations bc navigating those social interactions while trying to mask and follow proper social cues can be very exhausting and you may not even realize that you’ve been masking these issues for years. obviously anyone who thinks they may be struggling with these issues should consult with a professional, but if you watched this video and felt yourself despairing bc you don’t outwardly exhibit major signs of autism but feel that you struggle internally (or struggled A LOT when you were younger before you learned how to mask better) don’t lose all hope, you may just be a high masking individual w autism (speaking as a female who was recently diagnosed w autism in her 20s)
The diagnostic criteria are problematic - I was diagnosed Autistic as a child, I have issues with eye contact, back and forth conversation, I rock back and forth all the time, flap my hands, would line up toys, I struggle to approach people and have limited independence BUT I am very good at reading facial expressions and understanding tone of voice and I am very expressive. The rigid diagnostic criteria is why I almost wasn't diagnosed (half of specialists I saw said I was autistic and half said I was not) despite the fact that the traits I do have disable me and from the outside I do look quite stereotypically autistic in regards to my poor eye contact, rocking, and obsessive interests.
True keeping friendships going, currently in summer I am thinking if I could call my friend or not because we are getting farther and farther away. I can’t really make friends unless if people come up to me or act like me.
I have been diagnosed with autism and I can say this is literally all true
Omg! Same!
Same here
Not diagnosed but I suspect that I am autistic. I am 33 years old have always had a hard time making and keeping friends. I have always had a hard time communicating to others and understanding sentences, tone, and facial expressions from those I was or am talking to. As this is still an issue I face. Social situations make me anxious and uncomfortable. I hate being forced to make small talk and am pretty dang bad at it too. I actively avoid social situations if I can help it.
I need a lot of alone time or I get stressed out easily. Am a picky eater and tend to eat very few types of foods, as I always crave the same things over and over. I get stressed in loud, excessively bright and busy places. I have pretty strict daily routines that I follow, that cause me stress and irritation if they are disrupted. I get agitated/ overwhelmed easily as well. My hair tickling my face, my clothes being too tight or the fabric texture being itchy or uncomfortable. Or being too hot or cold can also cause me to be irritated very easily that I can lash out at people... I mean the list goes one and I could go into even greater depths with many of these points and really explain them😅 but I doubt anyones going to even read this long of a comment😅.
This may explain things. You might want to get a formal evaluation with someone who specializes in assessing adults for autism. You'd be surprised how many might read this.
I FEEL SEEN
Tell me you're an allistic person without telling me you're allistic.
Allistic?
Autistic
I tick off all three boxes. But I have worked really hard at learning to adapt. I’m now really good at picking up body language and tones. Most everything else is really hard for me. But I am impressive with adapting as far as communication is concerned, verbal and non. Plus my son is non verbal, so there is a lot of practice with him.
Keep it up.
I can understand a person better when they are explaining something to me much better when im not looking at them...its like i can hear them more clearly and visually see what they are trying to say in my mind. It just makes more since when i stare off into space when people talk to me...
@@ricardomontaguewhen i look at something basic i can focus on their words when i look at them i get distracted and think about their physical appearance. it feels super awkward to look at someone while their talking or while i am. i found out i was diagnosed high functioning at age 7 due to nonverbal but i was very active / i built a lot of cool things . It all came out at once when it did (my words) i was 18 when i really found this out. i was diagnosed again at 22. i manage to maintain many friends barely due to just being full of facts and insults. but am very introverted. very focused on what i like to do. i brush my teeth like 4 times a day, i have a strict diet. i get overloaded quickly with sounds and lights and people. at my family gatherings i spend more time in the bathroom or in my car. it’s not always easy , i do to much for others. but eye contact is something i’ve always struggled with according to others. if they can’t imagine i am listening that’s their fault. ears don’t have eyes. i am currently watching this and watching a movie while cooking and cleaning in my home alone that i own i’m 23. i will never sit down unless i’m sleeping or driving. at night i pull over sometimes and just hold my head because of all the lights. i’ve had a few seizures. Cannabis has helped more than anything with everything. but i quit. i get made of by waiters in restaurants alone for asking them to be more quiet or turn down the music but i typically just get free desert after telling a manager. I am good looking and physically fit and it’s hard for most people to tell, i scored a 135 and i am very good at holding conversations depending on how hard i try, but it’s obvious to people when i tell them about my condition, i have it.
So a lot of us probably act awkward and aren’t actually autistic
Being awkward is completely different from what he is talking about
Not me giving mixed signals to allistics through my expression, tone, and word combination and then my mom accusing me of being manipulative, deceitful, and abusive 💀
Sounds like she's projecting dude
Just to clear this up, you do not “have to have all 3” my brother who was diagnosed with higher functioning autism after 4 years of waiting is actually really good with facial expressions and tones of voices. And although he’s not brilliant and finding friends he can be good at keeping those who are good to him. He is very good at masking it. And I have been waiting years of my life to be tested being told that it’s harder to find in women so I should just give up and not get tested. I always struggle to stay focused in social situations and to be honest, my facial expressions may not always be good, but for me the struggle is finding something that I like that others are actually interested in listening to. I’ve always not been social at all which resulted in the people i know and made friends with usually being because of my one close friend introducing me to others.
But that’s just my experience I guess.
You do have to have all 3 parts in section A of the DSM plus 2 in part B to be diagnosed with ASD.
@@alies_mom Yes, though ASD manifests differently in each person and I think this might be where the confusion lays here, as he was using these as examples (indicated when he said "Things like", which literally means examples). I can get where their interpretation comes from, if you are taking it in a black and white manner. The point is that not everyone on the spectrum is going to have every single one of these.
@@alies_momno you don’t shut tf up autism is a wide spectrum if you know as much as you think you do you’d already know that
The problem with social communication is I spent 30 years observing how other people behaved and mimicked them. I can follow the social rules, without actually understanding them just through repetition and learning from mistakes.
i’m not on the spectrum but i’m definitely a bit different from most others and introverted. in social situations, i’ve always gravitated towards ppl on the spectrum because i felt like we could be alone together if that makes sense ❤
Thanks for explaining.
I had a late diagnosis at the ripe old age of 68…yay. Made sense of my entire life and now it’s my badge of honour. I live my life authenticity now and I’ve never been happier. The truth shall set you free… wahooo 🎉
I love this for you. I am 44 and just got diagnosed.
I am 65 years old. So many diagnoses that fit for me but all require healing time and work which I have been happily doing as it gives me that better understanding of myself and also my daughter who was just diagnosed at age 27. She definitely fit with having some autistic traits that I did not see because of the blind spot in myself. We are growing and learning together. Through her I am learning much and she has opened herself to understanding so much of our common “mother” experiences. Both have definite ADHD traits too. It is freeing!!
This comment made me 🥲. It makes me hopeful for myself. I’m still going through testing, but I feel strongly I am. I already feel more free and I’m allowing myself to just be me for really the first time in my life.
I have a diagnosis of autism but none of these apply to me 💀
I hear that a lot. I'm not sure why so many people diagnosed with autism say that they don't evidence the symptoms that define the disorder in the DSM-5. Possibly in the next edition, they will describe the symptoms differently.
@@PsychologyWorksOfficialbecause struggling with communication and being able to communicate aren’t the same thing. an individual can communicate really clearly and understand communication really well and still fit these criteria’s because of the comparative amount of energy and effort this takes. an allistic person can do all these things with ease compared to autistic individuals.
this doesn’t mean autistic people can’t necessarily do these thing. it just means it’s harder for us /takes more energy and that’s why for us it’s masking.
it’s can be hard to tell when someone with autism is masking and so we often go undiagnosed. however some of us get lucky and are diagnosed by people who understand masking.
this is why there are people diagnosed with autism who say they don’t fit these criteria.
also an important note is that this all considers how autistic people interact with allistic people or neurotypical people. my interactions with other autistic or neurodiverse people generally do not face the same barriers of communication and energy that my communication with neurotypical people takes.
I hope one day the most updated information on autism will be more known by the Drs talking about it. Being measured by actions is a very poor indicator for whether someone has autism or not. For high functioning people, ask questions that tell you the processes of that persons mind. Im very good at social performance but its not through the same path as a neurotypical person. I purposely studied communication characteristics and memorized them. Obsession with a topic, retaining facts, pattern recognition. All autistic reasons I was able to reach a good enough communication ability rather than the neurotypical way of simply absorbing tactics used in their environment as a survival instinct. The brains of autistics work fundamentally differently from neurotypicals and though one of the main impacts is always going to be on social interaction, it isnt entirely uncommon for our ability to communicate to appear to not differ enough at first glace to warrant a deeper look. But if anyone had the sense to look deeper given the scientific fact that autism is an internal difference not an external one then they would find that something presenting as "normal" is a result of a completely not "normal" process attempting to mimic neurotypical behavoir and will never be quite the same. I can distract people from seeing how strange I am with information, over performing body language, facial expressions, understanding banter and jokes, but if I let go of consiously doing those things I instantly fall short of appearing normal. In fact if I am in an environment not conducive to intensly entertaining someone ie drs office, bank, meeting, it is clear that I am odd and I dont know how to fix it without all my entertainment distractions. But the ways that Im odd dont include not being able to read people or keep eye contact. Its something else that obviously I dont know otherwise Id fix it lol.
I have been diagnosed with autism and I don't generally have any issues with communication. It's rare that I don't pick up on social cues or find difficulty in approaching people. To me, autism isn't cut and dried in this way or clearly I wouldn't have been diagnosed.
You talk about 3 areas of focus and mention communication and friendships. What is the third?
Did a professional diagnose you without have any social communication issues?
Hmm. I don’t know, this is more like a list of the ways that autistics annoy neurotypicals than a deep description
I hate it when people say, when talking about autism, the words all, or none. It’s just a generalization, and unless people can understand that not all autistic people are the same, they will be treated even worse than normal.
Im a female adult with autism and I definitely read body language very well due to being raised by an unpredictable alcoholic.
"Dont self diagnose"
"Dont self diagnose"
"Dont self diagnose"
Don’t forget we can learn social stuff though! Some of us understand social psychological phenomena a lot better than normal people as well.
You said 1 but you did not say 2 or 3? That made it confusing. Which one is two which one is 3?
Sorry, this video got cut off. Number 1 is all about different types of social aspects of autism spectrum disorder. Number 2 would be about repetitive or restricted patterns of behavior and interests, which is discussed in the longer video version of this.
@@dr.scottgreenaway Where is the longer discussion and what is number3?
I am autistic. I was diagnosed at 28. I spent so much time learning to communicate and speak, and how to have “normal” social interactions, that I feel like I wouldn’t “meet” the requirements for the social interactions criteria now.
But I did and have been figuring stuff out from the lens of being a late diagnosis autistic person. It’s helped me coach my oldest daughter who is also autistic.
Hello! I was diagnosed as autistic at a young age but I barely have any symptoms. I’m not monotone, I’m very expressive, chatty, not super sensitive to loud sounds, I understand social cues, I can make eye contact, I’m funny, and I’m very empathetic. Also I do NOT mask autism symptoms. Was I misdiagnosed? I need a second opinion?
I think a second opinion could be helpful.
I'm Autistic all this is all me, except I do have sensory issues. This video is an Allistic perspective of us and the criteria stopped me from seeking diagnosis for a long time as it doesn't accurately describe Autism
I’ve been diagnosed with autism by a doctor but I don’t have any of the following, maybe I’m just a weird ass guy 💀
These are the criteria listed in the DSM-5, which defines autism.
Yeas they are but you do not have to have all of these to get the diagnosis, you are listing examples in where it can show. Im a diagnosed adult and i have very good conversation skills and i also pick up nonverbal messages very well, allthough sometimes i have difficulty in these areas also.
Me too
If you were diagnosed as a kid, it could mean you had the signs as a kid, but you "got better" as you grew up. I was diagnosed with Aspergers as a kid, but as I grew up, most of the symptoms went away or became milder. Most people i know think I'm a simply a normal person who just happens to be introverted and a bit awkward.
@@esh9x153 just a question from someone diagnosed with aspergers at 14 who constantly questions whether they have autism or not, would you still consider yourself autistic? I think I would but the way I can handle myself in social situations leads me to doubt I ever had autism in the first place.
Thank you I was kind of interested in see if I was autistic...but I am very extrovert and have literally none of the issues described here. Maybe I am just an asshole 😂
You ain’t alone 😂
30%-80% of people with autism also have adhd, which causes them to be this way. I’m one of those people. The extroverted autistic. When the dopamine is satisfied, I have 0 desire to talk to others.
Autistic people can be extraverted.
I'm an introvert so only have a couple of these probably means I don't have autism but I'm trying to learn😅
This video is so flawed and outdated, based on a lot of stereo typical misconceptions. Also its common to have a dual diagnosis of ADHD.
Whilst you may have some of the introvert tendancies of some Autistic's, you may well crave the going out, meeting folk, new experiences etc. These can fuel the adrenalin that you use to replicate the dopamine. Its also worth noting that wether this applies to you or not, you may still be an asshole.
I struggle having back and forth conversation when I don’t know too much about the topic
I relate to all of these
edit: im autistic.
Don’t worry me to
Me too
I responded somewhere else that i think
struggling with communication and being able to communicate aren’t the same thing. an individual can communicate really clearly and understand communication really well and still fit these criteria’s because of the comparative amount of energy and effort this takes. an allistic person can do all these things with ease compared to autistic individuals.
this doesn’t mean autistic people can’t necessarily do these thing. it just means it’s harder for us /takes more energy and that’s why for us it’s masking.
it’s can be hard to tell when someone with autism is masking and so we often go undiagnosed. however some of us get lucky and are diagnosed by people who understand masking.
this is why there are people diagnosed with autism who say they don’t fit these criteria.
Good points here.
Just to add: It may not nessisarily be difficulty with social interactions; It can be a diffrent communication pattern and not eveyone whom is diagonsed with ASD struggle with social interactions while some do, as ots a spectrum. And we can understand friendahip, i get its a wording choice, but it comes off as 'All autisitc people cant understand friendship or social cues." (I cpuld be phrased like "A lot of Autisitic people have deficits in understanding certain social cues, and this can fluctuate within a person aswell).
When you meet one autistic person, Youve met one autistic person.
(Oh, and we do care about iniciaiting interactions, we just often are to anixois)
I also wpuld like to point out that a lot of autistic pople have truma, and therefore the truma can also influence social interactions and friend ships.
Yeah this criteria needs to be revised
Its hard to know when youre masking so much, it puts you into a state of denial. My mom was telling me stories of when i was little and the stars have aligned
Thanks for sharing.
This is my life
How lucky are you to be alive? ☘️❤️☘️
I feel like i can feel energy also...its like realy weird
I was diagnosed from a doctor of autism and I do not have the last one.
I wish someone would tell me these friendship rules. Like, they act like they want to be friends then when I ask if they want to meet and eat or have a drink they act shocked. Like, you were giving me the lets be friends vibe by telling me we should go out sometimes then act shocked when I ask when.......
Sounds frustrating.
@@PsychologyWorksOfficial it does, but it really makes me wonder what's wrong with them. I know im weird, and that's normal.
Neurotypicals are fundamentally dishonest
I saw the hat man in my sisters old house that was haunted. Her friends saw it too. I suffered from health issues like chronic fatigue afterwards and she would argue with me. Toys would start going off on their own in the middle of the night. The only room it stayed out of was my neices room so i slept on the floor in there. That made me think kids have a natural protection
That sounds frightful.
It is called a guardian angel, and yes, there is one for every baby. They may at times be up against too much opposition to protect a kid from really bad things. That doesn't mean they don't exist, and protect our kids from a lot.
Me: relates to a few videos. *2 months and probably 450 cumulative hours of very nuanced research later* I need to see a doctor
What does social ques mean?
I don't know how you would read someone's ques?
Could somebody explain an example
social cues are signals expressed indirectly (not in words). this could mean through tone of voice, facial expressions, body language, etc.
being unable to read cues could mean misinterpreting the mood of a circumstance and being unable to “read the room.”
@@ornithowlogist thank you! This makes sense now!
as someone with autism, you're not correct Dr scott. I am a registered behavioral technician and an adult diagnosed clinically with aspergers when I was 11.
I have since learned to mimic body language, hand gestures and tone (though its hit or miss and may appear awkward most of the time) I also have studied facial expressions and some sarcastic scripts and otherwise have been able to understand body language and facial expressions via logically and objectively looking for the requirements in their face rather than subjectively feeling it like neurotypical people do.
I initiate conversation and enjoy talking. I have no issue with back and forth. Some of us have autism but have learned scripting and masking to be covert hence its not possible to always just look at someone and know if they have autism as an adult.
Thank you for explaining this. I guess the problem with a short video is that all the nuances, discrepancies, and subtleties aren't discussed enough.
@@PsychologyWorksOfficial I would simply say there isn't one way to detect autism especially in adults. Our society has gone way too far diagnosing every single thing as autism so I understand the need to have good framework. As far as the continuing education thing goes, masking is one of the core components of adult autism. People used to think decades ago that people grow out of autism, but rather a lot of people simply learn what evokes the lesser reaction when in public or 1 on 1 conversation. Thank you for your response though!
If I'm diagnosed with Autism will it make my life better or worse? I feel that after getting diagnosed with ADHD my life got worse. I began blaming things on my ADHD instead of actually doing something about it. I'm medicated, but that seems to do nothing. I'm about the same as I ever have been except I can't get any of my chores done or find a job- not that I want one.
Id say worse then because you might use the autism as an excuse
I have autism and yes some of the points he said are common the way they are explained makes autistic people sound completely different from how they act
Wow just wow! This man is wrong. It's people like this that are the reason I wasn't diagnosed until age 44.
Sounds like me but I’ve always told people I’m an introvert.
Don't worry as introverts it's totally normal to have these qualities, I for example am really weird when meetng new people but am very jovial and ecstatic meeting with my old friends.
Yea same. Idk if I’m just an introvert with social anxiety disorder or if it’s autism cause I’m pretty awkward too, it’s just that I hold back often to not appear too different. I think I might just be an introvert too.
@@SuperKvlogs same ! did you get any answer ?
@@naya6119 It was more spiritual than anything. I was freed by God from the fear of people.
One of my twins is not even 1 and I am fairly sure based on what is said here that he is on the spectrum. I want the best for him and hope he can navigate life with our help well. I have met other people with autism and I have seen how challenging life can be for them and how out of touch they are often are with the perceptions of others.
I hope for the best outcome.
From what I'm learning on YT, this information seems to be very outdated, especially for females. What are the other 2 things? Also, you only explained the first of your three things. This explains the external type, not necessarily the internal type.
Exactly
While the socializing component of ASD is quite common, another common trait of autistic people is their sensory profile. that varies depending on the persons hypo or hyper sensitivities.
I have experienced fluctuating levels of sensory sensitivity, depending how stressed I am, how close to burnout. I have a young nephew who appears to be far more hyposensitive. To the point he thought my reactions of pain were funny when he rammed my legs at top speed with his tricycle, or used a loud bicycle horn.
😢 I could not escape the situation. My nephew needed to be baby sat every weekday, and I was expected to do it, no matter how I felt. I was then rooming with my brother's family, so watching kid from am to suppertime was repaying my "debt" to them.
Wow… 😢 this.. kind of hurts because that does sound like me…
My parents were sure I had autism growing up, now that I'm an adult I too believe I'm on the spectrum... We were never able to afford an assessment. I'm hoping in the near future I can take an evaluation to finally know more about this part of me
This online ASD diagnostic thing is getting out of hand. These symptoms encompass, like, 20-30% of the US population.
I don't recall the exact percent, but the estimated number of people with autism is a lot lower than 20%, probably even less than 10%. There are people who spend years on studies trying to estimate it, and they get different answers based on how they go about it. Usually they get in contact with clinics and find out what percent of their patient's are diagnosed with autism and then do statistical calculations to arrive at an estimate.
Ok i realized something.
I always had bad thoughts that i'm a bad person because i can't feel bad for some people even my closest people. People i love. I really feel bad when i can't understand why.
That's a wise observation.
Thank god I'm not autistic. Now, time to play with my toy cars.
(Edit: This is just an ironic joke. I'm not actually autistic ;). )
It’s not true that you have to have all of what you mentioned if you guys really know what your talking about you’d know everybody is different
The reason you avoid eye contact is not see body language you can't deal with.
People are fake but don't want you to see it.
They want you to take a hint but don't think bad of them.
I am telling something. The other person is bored. I stop talking. The other person immediately asks, why did you stop talking? Or continue their monologue because it's okay for them to hoard all the attention.
In friendship or even family you can walk away. But what do you do when your doctor or therapist looks bored out of their mind?
Get another doctor you say. Really? You think your medical file is for you? Your medical file is their CYA.
I think you mean to include the phrase "appear to" or "seem to nonautistic people like," because there are some autistic people (especially highly functioning ones) who think they have no problems with this. However, if you ask other (nonautistic) people about the person, they will probably say stuff like, "that person is a big jerk, doesn't think about anyone but themself," but the autistic person doesn't notice this or perceive themself this way.
Women present differently. Listen to autistic people on signs of autism. They're much more complex.
I think along with not recognizing certain cues, it's more like I recognize the cues somewhat after consciously observing.. but I also notice subtle throw offs.
Inaccurate.
badly
My daughter has all of this and I've been trying to get her diagnosed for years, she's now 20
Many psychologists don't specialize in diagnosing autism, but a psychologist in your area might be able point you or your daughter in the right direction if she is interested in getting a formal diagnosis.
I have none of those but I still panic..
I get some are non-speaking, but I love and appreciate my way and other autistic people's way of communication. I don't have it, it's apart of who I am. I wish there was a way to root out bigotry from people that practice psychology.
i cant believe i got adhd autism and proly schizoprhenia
If you think you have schizophrenia, you should see a psychiatrist as soon as you can!
Anyone else have issues with embarrassment of others hearing your conversation in public? At work i feel really awkward talking to someone from a distance. I also have a quiet voice so often times if i try to talk to someone from 10 meters away they wont hear me.
I use hand movement when trying to explain something in a conversation.
That's a good sign.
SO I DONT HAVE AUTISM?!
Hmm. Wentworth Miller, Anthony Hopkins and Daryl Hannah aren't autistic then?
I worked with kids on the spectrum, both high functioning and then some with more complex needs......and NONE of this applies. Not everyone is the rain man, or some quiet savant ( male) who loves trains.
No it means the expert is wrong@@memeoftheday6425
I had a 10 year friendship blow up in my face because I didn't know what she wanted to hear and couldn't word my feelings correctly.
That's a difficult situation.
“Difficulties starting friendships, keeping friendships going”… Damn, that’s a big one for me.
The whole thing about autism is it causes social difficulties, so I question why people who have a lot of friends/long term friends think they might be autistic.
How can you tell the difference between someone with autism and someone who hasn't been properly socialized as a child? (Someone who was homeschooled, for example, and didn't have a lot experience interacting with peers from a young age.)
Good point. You'd have to take all that into consideration when making a diagnosis. A clinician should just go by these criteria but other psycho-social factors.
My face is very blank the majority of the time. I never knew it mattered so much
I over-exaggerate my facial expressions. And I recently learned this is a masking thing!
I got diagnosed with autism when I was 4 I’m pretty sure
Good to know.
Losing people u thought where friends with no given explanation- but probably cos they thought you where rude because you didn’t understand all the social rules. Good that there’s lots of us autistic folk who can befriend each other and understand we’re not like them. Some may have learned pretty well to mask and fit in.. but we still miss stuff or over express social things.
My dad taught me eye contact and greetings and hand shaking - then I went out and started like a crazy person and said hello how are you really over expressed and shook their hand like a man (cos my dad was a man and taught me his way) and I’d say that I was fantastic cos my dad was always such a positive person. Ahhh so so many other autistic sign memories do I have from my childhood, teens until now 😅😂
I am high functioning. After I turned 18 or so I started understanding a lot more about facial expressions and tones of voice. People have a hard time understanding my voice expressions tho. I’m always labeled as being sarcastic when really I’m being serious. I still have trouble talking fluent but that will probably last my lifetime.
My own mom sometimes mistook my tired face for an angry face.
as an actually autistic….it sucks
Very confusing. I heard, you must have all three of the following... So, what's the third sign? Maybe, the inability to count beyond number two.
1.) Difficulty with social-emotional reciprocity. 2.) Trouble with non-verbal communication. 3.) Difficulty starting, maintaining, and understanding friendships.
Isn't this just most ppl.....
No, the CDC calculates that only about 1% of the population meets this criteria.
Nah this is close to retardation
I have to add that often we care about deeper topics than your average person (or getting more in depth) so we find allistics boring and they find us boring. But, they are the majority so we are perceived as the weird and less than minority. Living on this planet as an Autist can be quite disabling too
I was diagnosed with level2 autism. I do have a non autistic friend. He is a half legal guardian of mine . And he is 20 years younger. He comes a lot and stays.
I almost pick up on cues to much and overthink them. I th8nk that might be down to me wanting to get it right and trying my hardest to got it right.
I can understand that.
lol the irony is that I can't tell if anyone else is doing any of the things listed, because I'm autistic
I think I have autism but I’m not sure, I’ve look up symptoms of autism in women and I fit all of them
Do you have any good resources you could recommend?
@@PsychologyWorksOfficial no not really :(
@@Myopinionisntvalidbut I've heard that females with autism look different than males. I'm still trying to learn more about that.
I’ve been able to be a part of a nice sized friend group because of the similarity of all of us being undiagnosed autistic
I have noticed recently that I am terrible at noticing social skills, and also I approach people in really awkward ways, I do things that I don’t realize are “not proper” and also I embarked myself a lot and I just don’t understand a lot of rules, or basic manners, can anyone help me out?
I responded to the other post. Good luck. I checked out your videos. I like them.
@@PsychologyWorksOfficial thanks!
As someone who wasn't diagnosed with "Asperger's" until their late 30s all of my past relationships failed until I married my second husband, who is also high functioning (savant with a high IQ). His is more noticable while I've been able to find coping skills to mask mine. Yet,we somehow balance each other out. Is this common, or do individuals on the spectrum usually end up with neurotypical individuals?
I'm not sure of the actual statistics, but in my practice, it does seem that people with autistic tendencies maintain relationships with others with autistic tendencies. I think they have different expectations of each other that work, compared to the expectations of neurotypical individuals.
These are all true for me. I grew up with good parents, under good circumstances so i never really understood where my problem with social things comes from. It's the number one thing that creates problems for me. I'm not diagnosed but it crosses my mind that i have autism and at this point, i wish i had a diagnosis of autism because nothing else could explain why tf i struggle so much with "simple" things like that
Like literally I can't approach people in a normal manner. I come across either too indifferent or "too much" (the latter when I'm excited to talk to the person). I have zero interest in most people and what they talk about, and I don't know how to maintain friendships. What it's appropriate to suggest, what is not etc. And at this point, I can't even blame it on my lack of experience. I'm 22, in university, have met a bunch of new people, had a bunch of experiences i never thought I would have, and I'm still clueless
this is literally me. i learned how to mask and hide myself to fit in and not seem "weird" but i feel that i still come off as weird and have never been able to keep friendships :(
For me, it’s just the fact I don’t like predictable small talk. I get bored easily and I’m an introvert so reciprocating convo with people who small talk at some point gets old.
I feel the same way sometimes.
I dont have autism, and I admit that I had at a young age. I want to prove a point to everyone that I can do everything by myself and not let all these traits tell me that I can't since I'm on the low "spectrum". But right now I'm getting my life together due to all of the traumatic times I had to deal with my family due to my disability.
I just want to prove a point that one day I will be living by myself and doing things independently and not let anyone help me through my day to day life. Especially my over exaggerated family. I bet my own family never wanted me around because of me being different from everyone.
Ive lived my whole life not knowing im autistic until recently. I used to be able to mask pretty well but now im 58 im really struggling and its getting harder to maintain friendships.