311. The BIGGEST REASON to stay in No Contact! (The Love Chat)
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- Опубліковано 26 вер 2021
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#NoContact #TheLoveChat #MentalHealth
No Contact, Rebound Relationships, Dating Advice, Love Advice, The Love Chat, Intrusive Thoughts, Mental Health, Casual Dating, Anhedonia, no contact rule, Limiting Beliefs, How to Overcome Limiting Beliefs, Fearful avoidant, Anxious attachment, avoidant attachment, no contact - Навчання та стиль
"Do not sell yourself to someone who is not buying.." Gold words
Great line, thanks!
Yep, your value goes down!
Great quote
“It is their responsibility to come get you.” Amen
I saved this on my phones wallpaper as a reminder. 👍🏻
Mind set
What if they dumped u via text and without an honest explanation and you confront them by calling them cowards and immature and selflovers but you never contact them again? I am kinda regret this the last days...
I’m grateful for my family
I’m grateful for my health
I’m grateful for my job
I’m grateful for a place to lay my head
I’m grateful for new beginnings
I’m grateful for my friends
I’m grateful for coffee
I’m grateful for my dog
I’m grateful for getting up everyday
I’m grateful for my Faith
"If they want you and you meant something to them, they will come get you." Thanks Rory.
*“Don’t sell yourself to someone who is not buying.”*
🤯🤯🤯🤯 Whoa that blew my mind but that statement alone is something that shot out to me because it 110% true.
Stay strong guys . Time is all you got . Things get easier and better . 💪
Amen
I am in the 14th month of NC (I am in an other romantic relationship now) but I still listen to your videos for self improvement ❤️
Same here, exactly 2 years later!
I'm grateful for-
1. Having such a loving and understanding father
2. My four legged kid
3. My comfortable and luxurious life. Always having delicious food to eat.
4. The environment I got while growing up. So much better than a regular kid.
5. This UA-cam channel
6. My friends. They love, support and guide me whenever I feel low.
7. For my nephew. I can't wait to meet him and see him crawl now.
8. For getting the most beautiful room in the entire campus to prepare the class. And its the first one on entering our wing, so whenever someone will come for a visit or inspection I will get to meet and interact with important people.
9. For my boyfriend. He has his weaknesses and faults but he loves and cares for me and really looks after me so well.
10. For being alive. Could have died in an accident earlier, or killed as a baby, or from Covid19 or simply wouldn't have been born at all
I was literally about to dial his number! I can’t believe how rory is on point with this one
I've been on "no contact" for more than 3 months now and so far so bad. I've been trying to improve myself the best I can but it seems hopeless sometimes... Despite it all I won't give up! Many thanks for your advices, Rory.
Perseverance is a great strength. Year on, I can tell you it gets wayyyy better. Never stop improving x
So far so bad?..wdym, is she's getting happier/serious with anyone else?
@@blankearth5840 Thank you, my friend!
Stay in there! Keep hanging on. I’m going on for months now myself with a woman I’m desperately in love with and it’s terrible! Absolutely the hardest thing I’ve ever dealt with in my life even death in the immediate family is sad as that is to say! I’m hurting so much also but just have faith man! You have to! I have to! We think with our emotions right now, listen to the professionals here there are too many of them here on UA-cam advocating for no contact saying that it works and I know what I have done so far has not! Keep hanging in there. I’m texting you this with tears in my eyes myself! It hurts man. Fuck it hurts. I wouldn’t wish this on my worst enemy. Persevere and the universe will reward you if not God will! Good luck man It will happen.
It’s not about the dumper it’s about you!!! Work on you…. You will find someone better for you
Month 18. Had no negative emotions after 6 months, but thinking about her lately. I hate dreaming about her. It's been almost 2 years. I know everyone handles things differently, but it's just so frustrating how one person can do this much damage to me.
I have the same feeling. I cant believe someone who claimed to love me for 7 years could destroy me so completely. Been 8 mths NC for me... hope youre doing ok.
As Rory would say.... go into no contact.... Focus on you, eat well, journal, reconnect with friends, do exercise 💪 and keep going.
Your life is like a company - you decide who to hire, who to fire, and who to promote.
3 years strong to the dot! I can tell you guys, it does get better. It does sound like a cliche but it's true. Personally I'm grateful that this was the kick in the ass I needed to stand up on my own two feet again and start fulfilling my potential. And guess what ... I did :) Stay strong army! It won't be easy, but it will be worth it, I promise!
5 months haven't heard from him yet trying to stay strong with no contact 💪 and keeping beautiful 💛
Any updates?
It’s been 7-8 months of no contact and my ex never reached out. At this point I think he never will but in a way I’m glad that the relationship ended and that he won’t reach out. No contact helped me see who my ex actually was, gave me clarity and helped me get over my ex. Not kidding I’m still a bit hurt when I thought about the break up because of the broken trust. But I don’t want him back anymore. And that’s progress for me.
1. I am grateful for my friends who care for me and my wellbeing
2. Grateful for my body which helps me exercise and feel better
3. Grateful for these videos !
So right. If they wanted you, they will come get you. By that time you can find better.
This was really really helpful. No contact is best decision for someone and it becomes apparent over time. People, go where you're wildly celebrated, not merely tolerated.
Thanks Rory❤️
Keep in mind that when you love yourself you can have anything you want in this life..even ur ex. I realized that part of getting what you want out of a relationship is believing you already have it. I had too much resentment in my heart to love my ex in a pure way so that is why he dumped me. I was always pointing the finger at him instead of having fun with him. It starts with you. Now we are back together and he is fully committed and he won’t leave me alone because I turned my life around and realized that I was putting out negative vibes which pushed him away.
1, I'm grateful i wake up each morning.
2. I'm grateful i can still smile at people.
3. I'm grateful i have a roof over my head.
4. I'm grateful i have my Son and his family.
5. I'm grateful i can move. I'm grateful i can see beautiful things.
6. I'm grateful i can feel the Sun\Wind\Rain\Snow.
7.I'm grateful for my health.
8. I'm grateful for my resilience.
9. I'm grateful for ny friends.
I0. I'm grateful for my Cat 'Rory' (no joke there). 🍒
Writing this for those hoping to get better soon.
My ex broke up with me out of the blue 6 months ago I texted her one week after that and have been in no contact ever since. It was shitty the first month or so and around her birthday and our official anniversary but managed to pull through. Guys listen to Rory but acknowledge the fact that you have to stop watching his videos at some point because you won’t get better if you don’t let your mind drift away from the thoughts of your ex. Also I found that stoicism helped me a lot. Philosophy in general. Might look into it. Started going to a therapist as well - so far it was one of my best decisions ever.
Point is IT DOES get better. Slowly but surely you will get better! Listen to Rory this is the second breakup that he has helped me through.
Thank you, Rory! Not all the way healed but getting there!
Impeccable timing! Thank you, Rory ❤️
10 months strong here and she just removed me from Snapchat 2 days ago. I still miss her but my situation looks hopeless right now but thanks to you and Craig Kenneth I’m a whole different person. I don’t need her to be happy. Stay strong everyone!!!!
Same your situation lol stay strong
What happened 2 years later?
Im not even going through a breakup and I'm watching. Guys, it's gets easier everyday. Time passes, you'll get stonger, but you have to build yourself to be a better person than you were during the relationship. But it does get easier.
Rory! I came here in desperation and you gave me clarity. Now almost a year later, I'm happy, working on self love and loving who I've become through this process. Once an anxious attachment to a secure through time, its a work in progress. Thank you for your wisdom; you pulled me out of the dark, back into the sunshine. You're a good man. Much love.
guys stay strong i did what all he said and im proud of myself now
you just need to believe in yourself and it's no the end of the world, we all deserve to live a better life
For anyone reading this you got this....
Ive been in no contact for 18 months and i started from the bottom until i stumbled apon Rory's videos. Since then i seeked help from a therapist and was put on anti depression medication for 8 months, exercised, bought a few new clothing options (currently want to buy more but you gotta do it in bits and pieces), new hair styles, found a new job, got a new car (currently got myself a BMW sedan), saved my money (when she left me i only had $1500 in my bank and now i got tripple that), in a new and more healthy relationship.
If you read this far im telling you good things will come if you dont give up, stay in NC and work on yourself.
I am grateful for.. My family, my cat, my job, my car, my apartment, my freedom, my emotions, my candles, my faith, and my future.
I’ve been struggling for the last month from heartbreak. I’m just here to tell y’all things do get better. Give yourself time- you may not want an ex back :)
I am grateful my business survived after almost 10 years of the recession and the bloody lock downs of the virus over the last two years. Still able to have my house, my work, my dog, my good health, my PARENTS and lately more and more friends. 3rd month of no contact being the "unwilling dumper".. But really deep down feeling blessed and complete. Realised I still have a life after a divorce and a failed engagement. Like a train with little and major stations but always rolling on.. We will be fine people. Life always finds its way.. Take care.
This video is absolutely amazing. Thank you ❤️
why the hell does that hit so hard, thanks i needed that
I’m grateful for family, friends, my job, my finances, my car, my apartment, my personality, my mind
Day 9 of NC and I am watching this video (been listening to the entire playlist).
I'm grateful for:
1) The ability to rebuild
2) Being alive and healthy
3) Learning how to manage/reclaim my time
4) Friends and family
5) Whatever good opportunities the universe has in store 😉
“
I'm grateful to be able to afford a good lawyer and stop my ex from taking my daughter away 250miles . Looks like her plans backfired on that one For all those good dads out there check your state laws rules
Just had the foreseeable final talk with my ex in person after the breakup, and you were spot on. She was thinking about it months in advance and it hit me so hard last night and this morning. So thankful for your videos. You're like a father figure when it comes to this subject, for those that do not have our fathers anymore. Thank you
Did she feel regret later down the line after leaving you?
@@gamingphoenix9832 haven’t heard from her since. I heard she was with another guy and he ghosted her (which is kind of funny) but no, no way of knowing. I’m sure she will in time
@@AwesomeTBS You should check out Corey Wayne, he’s a no BS type of guy when it comes to relationships & dating much like The Love Chat. I’ve been 30 NC it hurts some days but some days it doesn’t. Either we get them back or we get someone better. But remember if she does come back we gotta make them work for our love 100%
No contact for 11 months now. Ex is dating a new guy. I’m staying alone and focusing on number one, me. I struggle to accept the lack of answers for why, but I know I have to be better than that pain until either she realizes her error or I find someone who sees the value in me I know I have.
Same
It'll get better mate. You're winning already by concentrating on yourself
Good stuff as always!
I’ve been in NC for a year. Today I found out he’s married. I’m devastated now but thank you for your videos. It helps me a lot to not reach out to my ex.
Oh man im so sorry. Reading this made my stomach drop bc its something I always fear finding out about my ex. We're complete NC though so hopefully that at least means I never would find out. Were you two speaking? Wondering how you learned he is married. Hope youre ok...
@@surrealfeline I’ve been in NC since the BU. One day I checked my block list on Facebook then I saw his profile picture changed...
My ex is not married yet but got engaged with 8 weeks after breakup.. he said she just fell in his lab..it is his next door neighbor when he moved out .it hurts..we talked for 2 hours today...right now it appears he is in Limersnce...I just have to step back and see what happens because at this point there is no changing his mind..I am working on myself and he sees it..I let him know I still love him with looking needy or despirite..so if it ends with his rebound If I'm still available then he knows to come get me.. I will not wait for him though..my options are open...what do u think?
Great video however I will say I was always proud of myself and grateful during my relationship before I was dumped by my ex. Just using NC to dig a little deeper to understand where he was coming from. It has been eye opening for sure.
Glad to hear u Rorey I'm heartbrokend person it was relationship of 11 years
Thanks Rory.. I need it this today .
Dating a new girl, she said she's not ready for relationship, she just wanna be friend for now. I walk away, dunno what will no contact do, but I really don't wanna deal with any dramas.
If she changes her mind don’t even bother with her, u don’t want someone who never wanted you in the first place.
@@Vareiance I have to say that in my experience this simply isn’t great advice. If you are still open to it when they do want/are ready to be more than friends, give them a chance.
Good for you for walking away, you did the right thing
I was involved with a woman like that who couldn't decide what the heck she wanted. I wasted my time while she flipped back and forth. I would say if she doesn't want one she probably just means she doesn't want one with you. Find a better situation.
I'm grateful for -
1. Having my kids in my life.
2. Having a good job.
3. Being valued for my contributions to the workplace.
4. Being healthy enough to be active.
5. Having family that supports me.
6. Having friends I can reach out to.
7. Being independent.
8. My home.
9. Therapy.
10. Being Alive to be thankful for my life.
Thank you, Rory!
No contact has worked great for me in general. I'm having a bit of an odd opposite problem now. I'm numb. As in I always feel like "this new person I'm dating has the propensity to lose feelings, and bounce". So mentally I end up ejecting at the first red flag. Not out of fear, but out of numbness... like a "Eh I'm not wasting my time on this person anymore, back to my passions/purpose". It's gotten to a point where I don't event want to date anyone... I've become addicted to self-progress in things like career, body, and travel.
I want to thank you for creating the love chat! Man, it’s gotten me through some tough times. I am going on 3 months of no contact after being blind sided by my ex fiancé of 5 yrs. That first month was the WORST pain and heartbreak I have ever experienced! I am 47 and have never felt like that before. I am feeling much better and I have my moments of sadness but I have learned to feel it and then shift and pivot my thinking. Once again, thank you very much for the work you do. It makes a difference!
By the way, my ex has a 9 yr old son that I bonded with and makes the breakup even harder because I miss that little boy. Could you create a video about how to deal with the loss of an ex’s kid(s) that we bonded with?
It’s the worst isn’t it? Truly awful. Waking up gasping for air and falling asleep crying. It’s like our hearts only catch a break when we are asleep
I am currently going through a very similar situation. The boy was also 9 and I was just starting to get really close with him. Didn't even get a chance to say goodbye. Time is a healer my friend.
I don't understand one thing, when you feel this much pain , also me and other dumpees. Why our exes don't feel same. Now I am in NC day 26. I am still dying inside. Why they don't feel same ? I remember she was crying even when I was busy at work and couldn't respond her text for 6 hours. What changed ? Where is that crying woman ? I feel hell in this world now but she could move on easily how? 😔
Badly needed this
Do not sell yourself to someone who's not buying well WOW
Hi Rory, I hope my insight makes you chuckle:
I am an optimistic single. My bed is half full (not half empty) :-)
Ha. That's a good one. :)
You are amazing! Thank You!
Happy to help!
Topic suggestion: How affective is no contact on the dumper?
Finally uploaded again
I’m grateful for my friends,
I’m grateful for my family
I’m grateful for my opportunities
I’m grateful for my bed
I’m grateful for my health
I’m grateful for the flavor in my food
I’m grateful for the beautiful view outside my home
I’m grateful for my cool - headedness
I’m grateful for living
I’m grateful for loving
Rory dude, I misses you! Nice to see a new vid. Hope you are doing ok? x
Hi Nikki! Just very busy with life. Hope all is well :)
I thought I had been doing great in no contact. Hadn't reached out, hadn't called her. Didn't text. BUT I had been talking to her dad. She found out because her dad was questioning her rebound relationship and somehow it came out which I think it was the mom. Ruined 2 months of no contact. And right in the rebounds arm even stronger. The questioning by her parents and finding out about me questioning it made their relationship even stronger. True no contact is NO CONTACT with ANYONE they know. Even friends. Cut it off COMPLETELY. You will regret it if you dont
I really need this
1.i am grateful for a beautiful house
2.i am grateful that I can eat twice or thrice a day
3.i am grateful that I have friends that I never thought were there
4.i am grateful I have a truck that takes me places
5.i am grateful I have a beautiful family even though they love far from me
6.i am grateful that I wake up to chirping birds
7.i am grateful that I have the freedom now that was snatched away from me
8.i am grateful I can focus on my self now than to be a slave to a devil
9.i am grateful I won't be abused and manipulated
10.i am grateful I am not a doormat anymore to anymore
11.i am grateful that I don't have to deal with my partners drama and projections anymore.
12.i am grateful I don't need to deal with cheating and infedelity
Broke up 8 months ago for our 4th time
Been NC for around 4.5 months, I was very needy and pushy as I lost my job and was having a rough time
I miss her so much, want to contact her
I doing martial arts, yoga, guitar lessons some gym and studying but she is still stuck in my head
Want to reach out because very hurtful things was said when we parted and feel like I should say im not angry and hope isn't too
I talk myself out of contacting every day, not sure if shes with someone else
No contact is the hardest thing, I have been told to forget her by everyone and I know its for the best but its not easy
Love you channel
Thanks
Today is my birthday! I actually had the best year of my life literally, I had my first real girlfriend! I experienced so many good things with her! I had a lot of insecurities! And I have worked most of them out now! I know so much more of what is good and bad! And I know I am even a better person now even thou I am broken, because I worked on my self in the proces in all of this trouble i figured out what to trust and what not to! I know I have to do what I want now, I know I have to listen to my intuition! I know I have to listen to others advice attentively, and think about what they say! I know I can't take what other people say and just do it if I don't feel it is right for me! I know what is wrong and right, I know i have to fokus on what is good and great instead of what I do not have! I know we will make life awesome when we take action to do so! We flip the chart so instead of a death spiral we make a life spiral! We will thank us self, we will create the best thing that has ever been ! We will motivate ourselves and others and life will only get better from here on out! Because now we know what we did wrong and we know where to make it right next time! 💪🏼😎 we will become better in every way and they will come back running, if they don't someone who is way better will and we will make things better with them and life can only be better because we chose to learn and we are gonna create that imperfect but perfect life that will only work for us! And whoever chose to leave us will in the future regret it!
Just spoke to my dad and he said his ex is terrible now, and he thank god he moved on when she did not want him, because he found a good lovable stable person! And you will too!
My ex reached out even though she moved away and is living with someone else now. We had a 6 year relationship. Have been broken up for almost 3 years. We've kept in touch over the last 3 years though. I did not respond to her after she reached out. Then a few weeks later she reached out again surprised I was so upset finding out she is with someone else now! Lol. I told her I wasn't upset and had other things to take care of reason I didn't respond to her the first time she reached out. She knows I have kept in touch with her other family members like her Mom and son. Says she cares about me and my family. Talk about mind games
Golden words
Ive missed listening to you Rory 😚
Welcome back, Kellie!
Can you talk more about what to do after no contact. Its not always as simple as ask for a coffee they say yes or no
It’s been over 16 months since my breakup. I’ve seen him. He has even joined in conversations I was in with other people. I don’t know what happened but, one day he was eager to talk the next he just doesn’t want to see me. I think what happened was the fact that I was wearing my wedding rings.. was married before him) I started wearing them I think he saw them and thought I was engaged. It’s the only reason I can think of. Right now I’m dealing with me and trying to move on!! It’s hard but, can be done.. I wear my rings because I’m not interested in anyone right now but, me!!!
My ex left me about 2 weeks ago. The story is less than ideal. We met at work when my previous relationship was falling apart. She really helped me see I deserve someone loving and open with their feelings ( the previous was like a wall and repressed ). We started dating after I had moved out but as soon as I was free of the last one I had a hard time moving quickly ( understandabley so ). The new gf was all over me from day one which at first was great but soon became overwhelming. Literally ALL OVER ME. She said things about the future that I always dreamed a girl would say but it made me feel uncomfy so soon. Talking about kids and being a good dad to her daughter. Anyway I pulled back and asked to go slow. Over the course of 6 months everytime I picked up and made a move she would make 100 and go super quick so I felt as if I had to hold back. I’m sure it was hard for her.
Here is the kicker. She was widowed 1 1/2 years previous and that guy didn’t treat her amazingly for 10 years but still …. Married for 10 years. I felt so much pressure to be at the same level as her for so long , eventually contemplated breaking up and did so twice but always with the older ex in mind and struggling to not only get back feelings of her but give the way this new one needed while at the same time feeling overwhelmed. When I took those 2 breaks I always was completely open, communicators that if we were going to have a relationship down the road I needed to heal a bit , and told her if I’m gonna be with anyone it’ll be you so let’s give it time and build a connection to have a healthy relationship down the road. Now one might say I shouldn’t have but there needed to be healing. I went back those 2 times because it hurt to not have her in my life. Hurt real bad. And yet I was struggling to move at the pace she wanted to reciprocate as she was INTENSE.
Finally she had a breakdown about her late husband and told me she could be In a relationship, went colder than ice, turned into a different person, and left me. I can’t tell you how bad this hurts. The whole time I should have been better but if I’m honest it was hard for me. And now I lost her and the pain is brutal. I reached out for 2 weeks emotionally and begged once, got a pity date but before then rethink things and said I really wanna work through issues before jumping into something she said she still doesn’t know if we would be just friends. This was all in the two weeks. When I got the date I tried to be sweet again but now straight up ignored. I have to go NC and give her that space and in many ways can only blame myself yet realistically I was hurting and I tried the best I could when in the relationship. Now have to walk away and it’s like I lost my best friend and a sweet person. BUT here is the difference. When I left I clearly communicated, talk for a long time , and said I just need a break so we can have a healthy relationship. When she left she went cold and said I never want anything with anyone again because she was in breakdown mode over her late husband. What a back and forth but after 2 weeks of me trying to be understanding and apologizing for my wrong doings I have to not reach out anymore. It’s so hard when you didn’t do enough and want to show them you want them again but it’s too late and they ignore you completely. I couldn’t do NC right away because I felt I owed her a lot of feelings and to be honest once she left it broke me. What a mess
I asked for a divorce from my wife, filed paperwork and I'm in 48 hours of no contact. She refused to move in after 7 months, and has stopped putting in any effort including standing me up for dates nights.
It's been 2 months since we broke up. I ve made some self progress, I got a new job lost weight and stuff. Today was her birthday, I didn't reach out. I'm miss her but I can't do anything about it.
Wow bro it’s been the same for me here 2 months after 8 years. I totally understand where you coming from. Stay strong man I know it isn’t easy hast been for me. I know that.
@@daviddiaz5928 Yeah man it's not easy, especially on weekends. Don't know what to think anymore tbh.
Gratitude 💜🖤✨
My ex and I just broke up a month ago, but for the last couple weeks we were still messing around. But I noticed the energy started shifting and we started arguing a lot more after the break up. Today is my 1st day in No-Contact. Wish me luck.
You got this!!
Good. My ex was hooking up with me after we broke up. It helped her get over me because I didn’t let her feel the break up
@@imthebest7290 oh wow
I have a question.. I feel quite a bit of resentment for my ex.. is this ever going away? It's been a year and a half and while I can see some of why she acted that way, I still resent her for it. She doesn't really matter much anymore but I do sometimes think about it. I don't feel like I got a fair chance in this, she rigged it against me.
I’m deployed and we were going to get married in December. We broke things off at the beginning of the month due to me being needy and clingy and led to multiple fights. The last thing I told her is that I respect and understand her decision and I love her hoping she can find what ever makes her happy at the end of the day and if she changes her mind she knows where to find me, I told her I was going to focus on my dream. Two days ago she posted on snap holding a guys hand . Was she trying to get me to react and yell at her? It’s been really hard being in NC and deployed. She helped me get through a lot and now I have nothing to come home to.
I am going through something similar . Its 3 times as hard as a normal situation . You will go through it man . Just cry it out . Just be miserable for now . It will change .
Deployed right now myself and I know this was a while ago, but you just need to focus on yourself. Let her do whatever dumb shit she wants to run into if she's just acting out for attention. I guarantee she's been with at least a couple assholes who burned her by now. She's probably thinking about you, but she had her chance. You just need to bounce back and grow from the experience. Become someone who knows their value and find someone who realizes your value. As someone who has been through 2 long-term relationships that were each about 4 years, trust me man: it's just a girl.
You're going to be fine.
I'm afraid I got the message after a week of no contact and I feel like I completely screwed it up
my ex left me a year ago. she's now married to a guy she has only known for a few months. somehow i doubt she will "come get me."
I feel the same. My ex dumped me a day after Christmas to get engaged to the guy 3 weeks after the break up. Dont worry my friend it really hurts and the damage to you is done but you can heal, work on yourself and find someone better while some point in their life they will doubt themselves if they made the right choice. You are gonna be the best while they will stay the same
Hi Rory. Can you please do a video about exes who come back then cheat? I blocked him everywhere months ago (as soon as I found out about multiple affairs) and have been working on myself. I don't want him back at all. I know I deserve better, but he keeps popping up in my head. I'm angry. I don't believe in closure - I'm not waiting for it. I think I'm just mad at myself for trusting someone just to let them burn me again. He is a gaslighter. I'm also so SO confused about why/how he tried SO HARD to get me back, got me, then greatly disrespected me.
You got it! If you need more support join us on the Discord! We are here for you
Thank you!
Sounds like dependency and need for validation or control. They probably wanted the security of being with someone while playing the field for someone else they wanted more.
I’ve been with people who were always talking to people during our relationship and denied it until they got caught by my friends.
No contact has always been the path of least resistance. My first girlfriends mom actually taught me this back when I was in HS and it works every time.
It’s always best to let these people go and wait for the person who wants you just as much as you want them.
It’s also important to take into account a person’s maturity level or their belief system for dating. Some people subscribe to some extremely toxic stuff that circles the internet too. I see this all the time.. yet, in reality, most of what is said in social media isn’t true for the vast majority of people.
That said, focus on your goals and you’ll find the right person down the road.
Same thing happened here. A video on monkey branchers and those who cheat or come back and beg to stay together then cheat would be helpful.
@@ctcrunch2 he has one in monkey branching! :)
Havent heard from her in over a month and broke up around 5 months ago, couldnt sleep last night at all and bawled my eyes out feel like such an idiot..
My ex broke up with me because of a physical disability and because I couldn’t keep up with her hiking routine. I have since been doing physical therapy and the problem is gone. I have lost 40 pounds and am hiking all the time. Have been in no contact for 9 months. Not sure if ever want to get back with this type of person anyway.
I don't know if you will see this, but this is the best thing that could have happened to you.
what if our ex wants us to do well, and better ourselves, and move on from them? then if we actually (whether that be real or fake) move on and do well, they also get what they wanted in a sense and it goes in their favour, and they don’t want us back… is this something that could happen?
I know this was over a year ago, but that’s a great question. Going through this rn with my ex. I’m trying not to think of me getting better as a win to him. Instead of I’m trying to view as a win to me. It’s not really him vs me though. I don’t really care if it also benefits him, it’s for me. My only concern is that he thinks he’s better than me, but if anything it goes to show he does care about me still. If he doesn’t want me after I better myself, then it’s his lost and it’s probably better for the both of us.
I'm not a chaser. He has another woman so why would I other. I have let him alone. We see one another at dances. He has started flirting with me now that he sees I'm having nothing to do with him. Won't be bothered with him. Thank you love. Hugs
This is the third time im doing No contact. 5 months in still havent heard a pip. 1 and 2 time she came back after about 3 months and i was so happy but this time it really seems like shes not coming back. We hade the best relationship ever but due to some personal issues she have she keeps leaving. I still want her back. Will no contact work a third time?
any updates?
@@darthvador6359 she came back about 8 months later
What if we're on a break/space apart is this the same idea ? She said I killed all feelings because of my jealously/insecurities issues but I feel like she's brought those emotions out in me. I've taken accountability, and admitted my mistakes but she still does not see me in a different light. I know she was chatting with somebody else as well I don't know what the extent of their conversations are but that's what caused everything.
If she asked for space that's what you give her. Give her more than she's expecting. Don't warn her or anything, just go radio silent. She won't see you in a different light as you say until there's been time and space. And you have to actually work on your insecurities. Let no contact work on her and you work on you.
But what are the thought processes when YOU are the dumper because you could no longer allow them to treat you in a way that was demeaning and devaluing?
Check out the “Unwilling Dumper” video
Hey Rory. Just statistically speaking, do you feel like male exes come back way more than female exes? I know I have little say in the final outcome, but from what I've seen on various coaches' comments sections, success stories seem to mostly come from women (cause men generally have fewer options). It's a little disheartening 😔
Personally i was thinking the same. Been in no contact with my ex for 18 months and i haven't heard a peep (saying that i dont want to hear a peep due to me being in a more healthy relationship). While my ex cheated and left me for her previous ex and left a relationship that lasted a year and 4 months to get married with a guy that only had a relationship with her for roughly 8 months before dumping her.
That's a great way to make yourself more miserable and maybe add a bit of resentment for all women. I completely understand where it's coming from.. but I don't think it's helpful. Even if you knew the exact statistical number it wouldn't be enough to eliminate that last bit of hope.
😅
First
1. My nieces and nephews
2.myself
3.my dog
4. Trump being out of office
5. The growth I’ve done in the last decade
6. Motivation to use this no contact discipline I’m other areas of my life
7. Painting
8. My profitable thrifting hobby
9. All the job opportunities I’ve had since the breakup
10. My 25 pound weight loss after the breakup
I'm 0-3 using No Contact. Do the math.
If you're using no contact to try and get an ex back the math seems real simple. This is for you, not them.
1. Coffee yogurt just tried for first time
2. The wrong turns I made today and that extra 35 miles I drove and got to see the view of airplanes departures ✈️
3. Another wrong turn I made back home and driving extra 25 miles to pass through NASA station and the view of clouds ⛅️ around sunset time.
4. The seasalt coffee I tried for the first time and that too I don’t had to pay for lol.
5. Receiving my chakra parcel 📦from old house, thankful to my old landlord to keep it safe .
6. For being not homeless and having money to buy my fav fried chicken 🍗
7. For the validation I received from a person that my ex new gf is ain’t pretty compared to me hahhaha 🫡😂
8. For those random cute baby puppies that I encountered and how they kept sniffing me today.
9. Thankful that my allergies were not crazy bad and I cried little less and finally almost close to after a year I feel one step closer to accepting this break up.
10. To Rory for helping throughout this journey, and even after coming back to his channel after months it all valuable words of wisdom to hear whenever distracted.
Coffee Yogurt???
@@TheLoveChat Soo yummmm , yes chobani released a new flavor I guess… coffee and cream 🫡✔️
Amd then she mo key bramches....so no contact doesnt do anything to get her back...its about you getting to be the best version of yourself...as she's getting throttled by the new dude...
We broke up back in March but he wanted to remain friends so we kept in a very weird "friendship" until last september I removed myself from that because it was too much pain and anxiety, we have not spoke since then… almost 2 months, I miss him sooo fucking much, I hate this! Courage to all of us! ❤️🩹
How's it going now?
@@aaronlimbu6537 Cheerfully shitty and anxious most of the time haha!
@@gquiros2457 My story's similar to yours
@@aaronlimbu6537 Im sorry! ☹️ It just sucks… stay strong!
@@aaronlimbu6537 Im sorry! 🥺💔 This kind of pain is fucking too much!