Coming out to my dad live

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  • Опубліковано 10 січ 2025

КОМЕНТАРІ • 219

  • @dylburdjamaal
    @dylburdjamaal  11 років тому +114

    Actually....although it may have appeared that my father was accepting, unfortunately, that did not end up being the case. He's actually never talked to me since this and he and my step-mother completely disowned me! But it's all good, It's FAR better to be hated for who you are than loved for who you're not! :)

    • @mychemicalemotions
      @mychemicalemotions 6 років тому +13

      dylburdjamaal I hope you're doing alright now.. :(

    • @cridgemcking2471
      @cridgemcking2471 6 років тому +8

      Stay strong.

    • @sherryblackburn4424
      @sherryblackburn4424 6 років тому +8

      I'm so sorry... I hope he makes it right before it's to late. My dad didn't speak to my sister for 15 yrs. He was on his death bed before the two of them made their wrongs right.... Best of luck to you

    • @boots484
      @boots484 5 років тому +8

      Ah man thats full of shit. I hope your chosen family is better! ♥️

    • @eallen7772
      @eallen7772 4 роки тому +3

      Oh no 😞😞😞

  • @dylburdjamaal
    @dylburdjamaal  12 років тому +33

    I live quite a good distance from him, so I wouldn't have been seeing him for months and I just didn't want to wait that long, especially when the moment came for me to have the courage. Ultimately, I don't think it would have mattered face to face or over the phone, because he and my step-mom have completely disowned me since...but it's fine. I'd rather be hated for who I am than loved for who I'm not, so my life will be much better off without hateful people in my life.

  • @grantboi116
    @grantboi116 9 років тому +61

    I guess I love you? Horrible response. Such a good looking young man who just wants to make his dad proud. Your a courageous young man and I am proud of you!

    • @zackpoling9662
      @zackpoling9662 6 років тому +1

      The dad was joking. He still loves his son even if he is gay.

  • @dylburdjamaal
    @dylburdjamaal  11 років тому +53

    Thanks so much for the kind words! They're truly appreciated. It really was quite a relieving, yet stressful moment to FINALLY get that over with. I was hopeful that he would still extend a bit of love to me after the fact, but with him ultimately not doing so, I'm fine with it. I'd rather be hated for who I am than loved for who i'm not! :) Being honest is much more fulfilling than hiding and lying!

    • @cepau335
      @cepau335 5 років тому

      You only have one vid..?!

    • @AngelGarcia-hq2ln
      @AngelGarcia-hq2ln 5 років тому +1

      Ohh baby you're si cute, i love You ya

    • @anthonyng3574
      @anthonyng3574 5 років тому +1

      You're right ❤. Just keep forward 🤗🦄💪

  • @dylburdjamaal
    @dylburdjamaal  11 років тому +18

    I very much appreciate the kind words, and I do know that i'm right and I am comfortable, independent, and happy, regardless of their hatred and ignorance. There have been a lot of unexplainably outrageous things that have been said behind the scenes from my step mom and dad, that I'm really extremely doubtful that this can be or will ever be amended, and I'm fine with that. I do have wonderful support elsewhere that continues to contribute much joy and happiness into my life! But thanks again!

    • @timpoynter7124
      @timpoynter7124 2 роки тому

      I’m gay too but my parents don’t know and I’m so scared to two of them because I’m scared that they both love me and disown me I’m scared

    • @mockingbxrd
      @mockingbxrd 2 роки тому

      You probably know your parents enough to have a good idea of how they will respond. Only tell them if your financial secure

  • @briano672
    @briano672 5 років тому +16

    Watching this in 2019! Hope all is going well for you and your dad.

  • @jonanye3079
    @jonanye3079 10 років тому +19

    Dude. You're sooooo freaking brave!!! I don't think that I will ever muster the courage to do this.

    • @Oculoustuos
      @Oculoustuos 4 роки тому

      @Jon Anye, I think you will get the courage.

    • @Oculoustuos
      @Oculoustuos 4 роки тому

      @Jon Anye it’s been six years, how’s it going? I

    • @enderqueenhd3826
      @enderqueenhd3826 4 роки тому

      I want an Update plss🙏

  • @meganhussey972
    @meganhussey972 11 років тому +9

    I was touched by your video and am really so sorry to hear that--when you asked your father if he still loved you and he said, "I guess," I got a little worried. I'm straight but I have a beautiful cousin who just married her lesbian partner--I love her and am very proud of her. Big hugs to you and stay strong:)

  • @donaldcampbell0720
    @donaldcampbell0720 11 років тому +18

    Well good for you young man , I wish you the best in life . Keep your head up and keep smiling . . . :-)

  • @JohnBrown-xt2li
    @JohnBrown-xt2li 10 років тому +2

    Watching brought back memories of what an anxiety riddled task coming out is. I don't think many parents have any idea of the fear one must overcome in order to do this. Congratulations to you, dylburd for pulling it off. I hope it's only gotten better.

  • @AvocadoToast-
    @AvocadoToast- 11 років тому +15

    There are tons of people who love you.

  • @shytguy
    @shytguy 11 років тому +5

    I'm straight and I've been watching these videos and try are so sad. What gay people have to go through. It brings a tear to my eye to see how accepting your father is. Be strong dude. Now that yore free you can start living your life without secrets. These videos really get to me congrats

  • @temptwostrong
    @temptwostrong 10 років тому +42

    30 yrs ago I came out to my "adoptive" and biological " family's but in a different way, I came out as attractant to another "race' or coral' if you will , my southern family's did not believe in race mixing and it was horrible, I was disowned, but I moved on and things are great married with kids and all to the love of my life, we all have rights

    • @mogotrevo
      @mogotrevo 6 років тому +3

      If I remember correctly 80% of Americans are fine with interracial couples which is sad because that means 20% of America is still not okay with it in 2018.

    • @lpssunnyofficial4069
      @lpssunnyofficial4069 5 років тому

      Temple East I’m adopded

  • @usamai294
    @usamai294 11 років тому +5

    ohh my God i cried watching this >> I've been so depressed lately and i'm thinking to tell my mother i know my father will never accept it ... sooo thanks for this video you are such a strong guy >>> just be proud of yourself and iam sure he is lucky the one who is gonna be your soul mate ;)

    • @giulia1968
      @giulia1968 3 роки тому

      Hope you’re okay now:)

  • @SuperLondon67
    @SuperLondon67 11 років тому +1

    you were brave, as I have been some years ago, it is not easy I know, but it is a 'burden' that has to be removed, you are a sensitive guy, you have my respect and my love, greetings from Italy xx

  • @davemark7243
    @davemark7243 9 років тому +33

    lol, sucks your father said "I guess". Its probably the most important moment in your life that u have needed him to say I love u no matter what!

  • @hectordavid4201
    @hectordavid4201 4 роки тому +1

    It was a tough decision, but what a brave and honest confession. I can imagine the stress and the relief. You are a beautiful person. Hope you are doing fine and have amazing loving friends around you.

  • @usamai294
    @usamai294 11 років тому +1

    I came out to my mom recently ... she didn't accept it but now I am feeling much comfortable with myself thanx allot my friend i wish we can know each other more

  • @dylburdjamaal
    @dylburdjamaal  11 років тому +3

    It means so much that this could be encouraging to people, as that was my highest hope! Even though he did end up disowning me, I do just want people to see that they can be true to themselves and not afraid to say so, no matter what happens. Ultimately, it is much more fulfilling to know that i'm not lying or hiding anymore than it was to have their "love" when they thought something untrue of me.

  • @philitiousness305
    @philitiousness305 11 років тому +1

    That's tuff. Just know you're right, morally and in every other way, they will eventually realized they wronged you, although they may never admit it, and they will want you back in their lives as they age. My folks did. So leave the door open for them and gather your support elsewhere til that happens. You're very brave and you did the right thing telling them, though it may take them years to realize it.

  • @dylburdjamaal
    @dylburdjamaal  11 років тому +6

    You can be! I would just suggest being in an independent and stable place in your life first, to be sure you'll still be good if things were to go wrong. Surround yourself with people who build you up and appreciate you for the person you are, and eventually it won't even have to feel like bravery, but honesty when telling someone the truth about yourself! :)

  • @ProjectGlastenbury
    @ProjectGlastenbury 11 років тому +1

    I'm really sorry dylburduamaal; about your family. What about your brother? Did he disowned you as well? No matter what, you are the most courageous young man, I wish you all the best. And thank you for sharing your life.

  • @dylburdjamaal
    @dylburdjamaal  11 років тому +5

    Thank you so much for your kind words. Don't let yourself be depressed! You'll know when the time is right to tell your parents, and even if it goes badly, as you expect, it's not going to be easy at first, I won't lie, but it will ultimately end up with you being much more happy by being able to live true to yourself without secrets. Keep your head up, you don't need your father to accept it, as long as you yourself accept it, that's the only one who truly matters. :)

  • @shefalig3638
    @shefalig3638 2 роки тому +6

    Heyyy, I know its been a decade, but checking up on you. How have you been? Howz life?

    • @mani-gf4lk
      @mani-gf4lk 2 роки тому +4

      Isn’t it crazy how quickly time passes? I hope he’s doing well now. I wish him the best in life.

  • @dylburdjamaal
    @dylburdjamaal  11 років тому +8

    It was nerve wrecking, but needed to be done! Although....there for a second, I wasn't too sure that I wasn't going to have a heart attack lol

  • @moonwerewolf126
    @moonwerewolf126 11 років тому +1

    At first, I thought it was nice of your father, but then I read the comments, and I felt sad. But then again, you said it. hated for who you are than loved for who you are not. Its not much, but it what it makes you happy. At least you had the guts to come out to him, and even that it was not the best outcome possible, it was worth it. And I know this might sound really rude and all, but I haven't seen anyone else tell you the truth. Damn, you are really cute.

  • @shawnarchuleta7665
    @shawnarchuleta7665 11 років тому

    Good job. I'm so glad to see that your dad was so understanding. It is very encouraging. Best of everything to you and your family in the days to come. Peace.

  • @lochlana
    @lochlana 11 років тому +1

    Dylan, I'm so sorry that your father and step-mother are distancing themselves from you. Obviously, it meant a lot to you to have the assurance of your father's love. I'm glad you had the courage to speak your truth. Being yourself is the only way for you to be happy. You go on being true to yourself. I burst out laughing at the last few moments of your video. I've been there too. The "I finally did it moment." Know that you're completely lovable.

  • @anongayblog7440
    @anongayblog7440 11 років тому +2

    OMG dude you are so brave, I was nervous watching this! I was getting tense as it must have been so difficult - well done though and hope you're doing good

  • @dougules
    @dougules 11 років тому +1

    So courageous. I never have had the balls to come out to my dad, even though my mom told him and he treats my boyfriend well.

  • @ourhousetx
    @ourhousetx 11 років тому +1

    I am so sorry for your loss. But at least you are being true to yourself and it really is your Father's loss.

  • @dylburdjamaal
    @dylburdjamaal  11 років тому +1

    It warms my heart more than I can ever say to know that I can help anyone in some small way in their process of coming out. Once you do come out to people, the more and more you do it, the easier it becomes. Just surround yourself by supportive friends and know that you are valuable, loved, and awesome just exatly the way you are, and it really doesn't matter what anyone else has to say! :)

  • @aeboi617
    @aeboi617 11 років тому +1

    I'm really sorry to hear that your family could not accept it. I sort of figured what your dad said after you asked if he will always love you that he would not be accepting. Every parent in the world would love their child unconditionally no matter what. I hope they come to terms one day.

  • @JS-nu3kv
    @JS-nu3kv 5 років тому +3

    my heart hurts for you because of that "I guess" . I'm so sorry that was the best he could do

  • @tyler496121
    @tyler496121 11 років тому +10

    My dad was not good when I told him yesterday, I dont think I will hear from him again, He is a Baptist preacher so it is what it is, hope you are doing good.

  • @OEverettC
    @OEverettC 11 років тому

    I'm trying so hard to find the courage to come out the people in my life. Thanks for sharing this with me... it's videos like this that help little by little

  • @TheMedicalReptile
    @TheMedicalReptile 11 років тому +1

    Congratulations on making it through, although your dad does not communicate with you anymore, may you live a happy life.

  • @michaelmichaelfordloverman8332
    @michaelmichaelfordloverman8332 4 роки тому +3

    I came out years ago and I'm proud of you I'm still coming out to people myself it's the hardest thing I've ever done but most people I know are supportive which is great I think your a brave young man for coming out to your dad your not alone I wanted you to know that keep being you

  • @larkpraise
    @larkpraise 4 роки тому +2

    Dad seemed to care more about the movie and the election than his son.

  • @Frühobst
    @Frühobst 11 років тому +8

    you are so courageous.

  • @stevenreichertart
    @stevenreichertart 5 років тому +1

    You are so courageous and proud. Thanks for typing out the dialogue. I hope everything turned out well for you.

  • @zzzz3190
    @zzzz3190 10 років тому +3

    SO BRAVE!!!! I was scared to death he was going to be disapproving. He seemed Ok with it. WHEW

  • @tsbio
    @tsbio 4 роки тому +3

    It's been 7 years, how are you and your dad doing? I hope your dad has reflected on what he lost and has reached out to you.

  • @dylburdjamaal
    @dylburdjamaal  12 років тому +9

    I know my dad is pretty hard to understand haha I should have added subtitles! It's been of a bumpy road since...but then again it's only been a little over a week, so I'm confident it will get better and better over time and in the end he'll be understanding and fully accepting. But I appreciate the kind words and hope this can be helpful to anyone who watches it! :)

  • @char652006
    @char652006 11 років тому

    Very proud of you. I know how hard that can be. But I thought it went well. Now that weight is off your shoulders. Hope everything turns out with your brother and dad.

  • @calm713
    @calm713 5 років тому

    This guy is a brave man, i respect that.Those who are gay who can never admit it to themselves, let alone others, end up being mean, nasty people. But this dude is a righteous bro.

  • @etexman020202
    @etexman020202 10 років тому +6

    Thanks for typing out the dialogue. Give us an update!!

  • @Jaykay321
    @Jaykay321 10 років тому +4

    Congratulations for doing what you need to for yourself. :)

  • @vincentbain1392
    @vincentbain1392 6 років тому +2

    After 30 years, I finally came out to my family. I sat them down and told them: “Dad, Daddy, I’m short!” At first they were in denial because they are both over 6’ tall. But after fighting over whose genes contributed to this freak of nature, they finally accepted it.

  • @sav47
    @sav47 11 років тому +2

    Aww! I was scared for you! So proud of you though

  • @chelseabrien8166
    @chelseabrien8166 11 років тому +18

    my parents would send me to the adoption agency if I ever told them XD

    • @simonhardabi9051
      @simonhardabi9051 10 років тому

      i gues i would do the same!

    • @SpiritOfTheOpera
      @SpiritOfTheOpera 10 років тому +5

      Yeah I'm already adopted. So I think mine would just disown me

    • @lewdbanana6613
      @lewdbanana6613 10 років тому

      lol sameeeee

    • @jkd4life1995
      @jkd4life1995 10 років тому +1

      Wow, you guys either have shitty parents or they're all born in the 30's...

    • @lewdbanana6613
      @lewdbanana6613 10 років тому

      jameson brown lol

  • @johnbrown3711
    @johnbrown3711 6 років тому

    It never ceases to amaze me that to tell someone important in your life that you are gay can cause an extreme amount of anxiety ... even when one is prepared for it. Could really feel it, to the point of tears, here.

  • @SuperPowers989
    @SuperPowers989 11 років тому +1

    Awwww, awesome job bud! :) happy new year :)

  • @Somberasmrfan
    @Somberasmrfan 2 роки тому +2

    Can we get an update

  • @sallylove1998
    @sallylove1998 11 років тому +1

    I hope your father and your step-mother didn't or hasn't insulted you for who you are. I got very emotional watching this video and that took a lot of courage for you to tell your father that you're gay. I respect that, and I could see that you were trying not to break down while on the phone. Things will get better (:

  • @NellasxElensar
    @NellasxElensar 5 років тому

    Haha, I was like *gasp* _He did_ NOT _just say that!_ when your dad said "I guess" and I felt so happy when at the end of the call he said "love you" :) You're so brave, I'm so happy for you :3

  • @edwelty
    @edwelty 7 років тому +1

    Hugs from Colorado! How are you now?

  • @Oenhero
    @Oenhero 11 років тому +3

    oh my god I am so sorry dude

  • @delorainej72
    @delorainej72 10 років тому

    LOVE YOUR DAD......HE IS A LEGEND

  • @TheGaydar1
    @TheGaydar1 11 років тому +1

    Love you man.- You have stamina!

  • @shuckyducky118
    @shuckyducky118 11 років тому +2

    the whole time, my heart was beating 90mph......for you. I guess i'm in that same boat as you were. I haven't told my parents, but NEED TO SOON. They aren't gettin' any younger. I tried to look to my so-called 'friend' to help me with this, but NO HELP THERE! Some Friend, he is......blah. But at the end of the day, I commend you on your bravery. If only, I had the same bravery to do what you did........

  • @ThePumpkin8907
    @ThePumpkin8907 11 років тому

    That was very brave of you. Im glad you're dad has accepted you

  • @madtingz2288
    @madtingz2288 6 років тому +1

    Oh god this is sad. I feel so awful for this guy, I know how hard it is to just say those words.

  • @Model19ify
    @Model19ify 11 років тому +1

    I think its alot tougher for guys to come out that they're gay. always be proud of who you're no matter what people think. :)

  • @Leonion6
    @Leonion6 Місяць тому

    Dang, that was depressing.
    I hope you're well.

  • @wli4796
    @wli4796 12 років тому

    so proud of you, I wish I could be as brave as you were.

  • @dannyphilbrook7669
    @dannyphilbrook7669 4 роки тому +1

    Beautiful man

  • @fukinmonster1
    @fukinmonster1 11 років тому +1

    Good job man we are proud of you

  • @SprinkleofWilly
    @SprinkleofWilly 11 років тому +1

    It must be so difficult for you. sorry to hear that.

  • @dylburdjamaal
    @dylburdjamaal  11 років тому

    Actually....although it may have appeared that my father was accepting, unfortunately, that did not end up being the case. He's actually never talked to me since this and he and my step-mother completely disowned me! But it's all good, like you said, I am now free to live my life without secrets and I am definitely much happier that way. It's FAR better to be hated for who you are than loved for who you're not! :)

  • @williamgreene5398
    @williamgreene5398 11 років тому

    I'm 58 and wish I had your guts. Good for you.

  • @CPLJoe87
    @CPLJoe87 10 років тому

    I can related with the nervousness that comes with it

  • @phillipdavis5173
    @phillipdavis5173 11 років тому +4

    I never had the chance to have 'the talk' with my own father. I'm not certain how he would react, I think negatively but I also believe that at some point he would wish he could take it back. Anyhow, don't give out the hope that things will turn around. His initial response was to be at least somewhat supportive, which is good, that means his base nature was to try and be there for you, right? Anyhow I found it interesting that your dad seemed to have a parallel but reaction to how my mom reacted. The major difference is that although like you I had to prompt for a response,after the reveal ... but after a 'do you have any questions' she just kept asking 'you sure'?
    It's not easy, but don't give up looking for people who accept and love you for who you are -- because you deserve that. I hope you have some supportive people in your life.

  • @brooks2785
    @brooks2785 12 років тому

    Kinda hard to mae out what your dad said in some parts of the vidoe but I hope everything worked out well in the end. You deserve to be happy and are always loved by othrs and should be noticed as an inspiration to many who watch this video and others like it.

  • @musicforever82
    @musicforever82 11 років тому

    I gotta say...this was crazy sweet.

  • @danieldebruin226
    @danieldebruin226 10 років тому +1

    Good work, proud of you :)

  • @yorrickt6991
    @yorrickt6991 10 років тому +5

    How's your relationship with your family now? You said it didn't get that well after your coming out that day. I hope you're good now and don't be mad or upset with your father. Remember there're still lots of us who watched your video love you and feel proud of you :D Though we're not seeing each others' faces, but do know we'd for 100% sure hold your hands when time gets tough! Keep going and keep smiling :D (sry for poor English...)

  • @FurryFantasyRave
    @FurryFantasyRave 11 років тому

    Sooooo awesome of you!!! I'm still to nerves to even hint it to my parents, but good for you =3

  • @FINEDIAMOND
    @FINEDIAMOND Місяць тому

    Jamaal, any updates? Has your father come around in the 11 years since this video? I truly hope so!!!

  • @timlions1703
    @timlions1703 4 роки тому

    I'm not even joking, that sounds EXACTLY like my Dad. If his name is Walter, you might be my brother

  • @ikenndipolux6755
    @ikenndipolux6755 3 роки тому +1

    Hi, how is the situation now for you?

  • @62ynnek
    @62ynnek 11 років тому

    Congrats! now live life and be happy with who ever makes you happy :)

  • @egypt12100
    @egypt12100 11 років тому

    ive been thinking of coming out to my parents but don't know how they'll respond

  • @TheShallowBunker
    @TheShallowBunker 11 років тому

    Not your parents being the only two people to dislike this video.

  • @AndrewDangerously
    @AndrewDangerously 11 років тому

    Sorry to hear that. How did your brother take it?

  • @midlajck2268
    @midlajck2268 3 роки тому

    I still don’t have the courage to come out to my Indian parents

  • @TheMichaelanthony18
    @TheMichaelanthony18 12 років тому

    I came out to my dad and he kicked me out :/ but now everything is better

  • @속도왜건
    @속도왜건 10 років тому +3

    love is free

  • @Mahalo222
    @Mahalo222 6 років тому

    Dad sounds loaded.

  • @antique378
    @antique378 6 років тому

    If only I had your courage.

  • @JohnMrJohnnyx8Johnson
    @JohnMrJohnnyx8Johnson 11 років тому

    Ok then why are you looking at this video then?. May God bless your soul

  • @amdnovello
    @amdnovello 10 років тому

    I loved this video! I wish i have your courage! On the phone it looks easier though :). How is it now? Did he accept this?

  • @sweetjustice4488
    @sweetjustice4488 11 років тому +9

    Your so handsome who be mad at that face for anything.

  • @MelCNutty
    @MelCNutty 12 років тому

    Congratulations!

  • @kiekie0690
    @kiekie0690 11 років тому

    So encouraging even if he did disown you, thank you

  • @angelusavila3832
    @angelusavila3832 4 роки тому

    Great respect!

  • @sean7245
    @sean7245 5 років тому +1

    Does anyone know his instagram? I always wanna know what their life is now years after coming out.

  • @narutosergia
    @narutosergia 11 років тому

    You just could help us with a subtitles in english when your dad was talking. So many foreing people wants undertand what he sad. Tks.

  • @Tony-lq1zp
    @Tony-lq1zp 11 років тому

    the phone....

  • @jbendezu
    @jbendezu 11 років тому

    I'm so proud of you :)