Not really. Everything is about timing. It's like falling in love. Rarely do two people fall in love at the same time. She is well within her rights to ask him where does he see this situation going. It's only been a few dates and all she is wondering about is if he is interested in her in that way. She can simply have the conversation.
JackieJacks it definitely seems to be a no. In this short conversation she’s talked about abstaining, biological clock ⏰, and how ready she is for relations. Out her own mouth, she displays her red flag 🚩 collection. But like a lot of women she has that I can convince him spirit. I hope ole dude has a Netflix account because it’s definitely about to be some chillin 😎
@@itwaswritten1196 PREACH!! I know too many women who come from the "sit and wait" approach. She really didn't sound like she was internally willing to reach out to "this man". It almost sounded like she would take "any man" who would make life easier for herself and if he happens to benefit from it too then that's just the icing. It don't entirely matter.
She's going to love him right, heal his heart, get him to trust again......he is going to be right.....FOR THE NEXT WOMAN! Girl, MOVE ON! He doesn't need a girlfriend, he needs time and good therapist!
Well said,the only thing that would come from this is rebound sex.if he agrees to marry her she can finally have sex but no man in the USA that is smart would do that because the courts goes in favor of women. When she decides to get a divorce. Anyway she is going to have a hard time finding a man and it's so sad she waited till she was 30.I don't think god cares if a person get marries or not.The point of marriage is for passing on genes.But if you don't get married you can't reproduce wow that is rough.Adam and Eve were not married.They were the only 2 humans in the world so they just reproduced.Marriage lost its purpose long ago but people stick by it because of religion.She should try going for a common law marriage that's the only way a man would get involved with a marriage if it doesn't involve the state.
he's with her to heal and once he feels better, he's gone to someone else he really likes. let this one go, woman and find someone who is ready. it's not your job to fix him
unfortunately, the fact is women in their 30s find it hard to get men their age why ? well because they aren't as pretty as they were when they were in their 20s plus what drives them in their 30s is the need to reproduce and some men like to wait a few years before they do that but women don't have that time their biological clock ticks as she ages which makes her very desperate The right way to get a male is when your in your 20s you make sure to lock him down and mold him into what they want as a potential mate so that when the get into their 30s they can just make babies but starting to find a man at 30 is hard because women don't look as good as they were in their 20s and men are visual creatures we link beauty to good eggs
@@QueenStylin Just so you know, males pursue women they like. If the guy isn't trying to please you or make you like him. Then your wasting your time.Now if you play hard to get that is one way to keep him on the trail but the moment he thinks your not interested he will lose all interest in the pursuit. Females should never pursue males it just means that he is not interested hence the reason why he didn't invest any money or time.
@@QueenStylin If a lamb presents itself in front of a lion the lion will gladly eat it otherwise it will see it but not see it .Hope you catching what i am saying. Just in case you didn't it doesn't matter if he can see you he doesn't care but if you appear and serve yourself to him he will be happy to strip you of your meat.
Men are visual creatures.They are attracted to beautiful women and the fact that she wants to get married to have sex means she has to prove why she is worth getting married to when other women are giving up sex without the need for marriage.What makes her special from all the rest.That is what she has to prove.Unless she is wasting her time
@@candykane5442 Right? Smh these men here seem to want to put no effort into dating/courting a woman... it's sad these days and this is coming from an early 20s girl
Gurl, leave the construction projects to a professional. Don't waste your time on someone who's not in the head space to be in a trusting, committed relationship
Yup, rebound sex.She want this to work because 1 she realized her market value is in a sharp decline meaning her ability to attract a man is dropping quickly. 2 Her biological clock is ticking and if she doesn't find a mate soon to pass on her genes.Then her gene is out of the pool.It ends with her.Thats why she so desperate for it to work.
I wish my wife could have seen some of these videos. It would have helped our marriage out a lot more than those stupid marriage counselors we went to. She's not with us anymore, and I'm sure she's a lot happier now. RIP Michelle.
Well it's very simple.She is inexperienced and desperate.She seems to be in her 30s and she has not found someone yet to marry her.Her biological clock is ticking and right now this guy gave her a little attention. She see potential in this guy to marry her so she can have sex and start a family.But she is a little late to the game like most women in their 30s who had fun in their 20s they all ask "where are all the good men" that is the mistake most women continue to make lol.
@@chrissalley9468This is so true and if they don't find a mate their genes end with them unless they go to the sperm bank which would be a good move if they can handle it financially but in the sense of ensuring their gene live on
The issue is that it sounds like he's on a rebound. Never date someone who's still caught up with their ex because you can bet your last buck that ex is still lurking in the shadows. You're just going to be his back-up plan until he gets the woman he really has his eye on. In a relationship you should never have to act like someone's mother or their therapist. Girl get you a man who has his life together.
By the info she gave she is in her 30s and biological clock ticking and right now to her this man seems like the best choice at the moment that is why she wants to make it work but little does she know is that at 30 her attractiveness declines and the amount of men she can attract becomes harder and harder as she ages and he is in his 30s he could still mess around with someone in their 20s but by how she behaving she is ready to settle with the beta male and mate with him if possible #thegenemustliveon
@@user-zx5xw4yw2e Well imagine if you met someone who you thought was cool and you realized hey this person has a lot of virtues that would make a good mate to have children with. Wouldn't you try to make it happen.Knowing that the possibility exists that you won't find someone like this ever again
@@penlavits3305 That doesn't apply to this case here. What virtues n qualities are so great about this man. He took her on a date n allowed her to pay, 👎 👎. But to answer the question uposed: No I would not if its one-sided.
I usually agree with Steve. But she a legit Christian so she doing what the Bible says. Sex is for marriage. It really is . I have fornicated in the past and it feel good at the moment, but in all honesty . It’s nothing like saving yourself for your spouse. Me and the woman I married was celibate 4 years before we met each other. Was it easy? No, but if you really trust God he can strengthen you. I know it’s taught that all men want is sex and it’s impossible to practice purity. Apart from God yes it is impossible, but with God he will strengthen you. I use to think it was impossible. Why would God tell you to do something that’s impossible. If you turn your life to him he will empower you with the Holy Spirit to live a life pleasing to him. Do that mean you won’t sin? No, but your heart towards it will change
I COMPLETELY agree. Theron you're obviously speaking from experience. I know because I am experiencing this same strength from God to WAIT!! At this point I trust God totally with my whole heart. He has a PERFECT track record and He ain't failed me yet. Me on the other hand I have a 100% failure rate at picking a man and doing things MY way. But only TRUE believers will understand this and I've learned that even those are far and few between. I hate that Steve's tone was a bit condescending and made this young lady shrink back in her confession of celibacy. It's a beautiful thing that her husband will LOVE and RESPECT her for one day!
This response is stupid and shortsighted. Because she pays her own way she keeps control of what she will or will not do. If she tries of him she can leave with a clear conscience. It's not always about him, women need to set standards and not deviate based on getting things. Be strong sis you deserve a man worthy of you...don't settle
@@truthsavant6005 If you're dating a man, and paying for your "dinner date" that in my opinion is what is stupid. I can take myself to dinner. Again men pay for things that they care about, or interest them. Sorry if you're unaware.
But what she is looking for is a male to fertilize her eggs not people to hang out with the fact that she is celibate means she very inexperienced which means she will waste her time pursuing men that won't commit plus her biological clock is ticking if she want to have children she got to make it happen with someone she can attract if she can't her gene dies with her
@@ramseyabsessien8990 WOW. SEXIST AND WRONG. You have no idea what it is to be a woman. NO IDEA AT ALL. He makes more money then women, he will make it back faster then women! Plus women already pay more to live. Women have NEEDS, not want to shop, NEEDS OR society expectations. Dresses, heals, pantyhose, must shave. Bras and underwear. Guys only have underwear, don't have to shave. The list is absolutely endless, she pays far more then you do buddy in money and time to get ready. So you can pay for date(S), it won't be equal but it will help some. So yeah she deserves free meals.
Steve gives decent advise but I disagree with this. If the man has been hurt she DOES NOT need to waste time trying to prove anything. If he isn't interested in her, she will just be spinning her wheels while stringing her along. "I want to be in a relationship" is not the same as "I want to be in a relationship with YOU" don't get it twisted. Then it seemed as if Steve was insinuating that she should sleep with the man to convince him she won't hurt him? WRONG again. That will only create a soul tie and muddy the waters even more. This young lady needs to MOVE ON! She's on the right path by preserving herself intil marriage. The man God has for her will PURSUE her and there will be no question as to whether or not he's for her. Furthermore if she seeks God about ANY potential mate, she'll ALWAYS be given the right answer!!
That's all nice and everything but this woman in her 30s she don't have time to be waiting unless she doesn't care about passing on her genes and if that's the case wait and let your eggs go bad by the time the man get there she has to get to know him 1 then she has to get married 2 then after 1 year of trying to have a baby with her age increasing that's going to be hard she may not even have kids.
@@AngeliqueHenderson You're so very welcome. I'm a woman that is chosing my purity over a "relationship" too and Steve was out of line for his response. We shouldn't be shamed for taking a stand for righteousness. Everyone won't understand but the RIGHT one will appreciate it. A virtuous woman is precious and her value surpasses all others. Be blessed 🙏
@@penlavits3305 Not just to have kids but was a business contract between state government as it is today. People think marriage is something God invented, which he never did in the first place. Gd joined Adam and Eve spiritually. Marriage was later invented by men via states and gverment practices.
Thandeka Buthelezi that’s called settling and while waiting may work it will also push other potential relationships away and the risk of waiting for nothing wasting your time.
Have to dissagre. Seems like he playing safe not to get hurt, but they had some conversations...and he still there. He likes her. He might need help allso getting over stuff, but that is something a theraphist should tacle. But that dont mean they cant walk together.
Even before I hear what Steve has to say, I know a real man will pay the bill... as long as the guy is totally interested ...even broke... he will make means to impress and pay the damn bill!!!
HE IS LOOKING FOR RELATIONSHIP BUT AS STEVE SAID HE IS HURT 😢 YOU HAVE TO BE PATIENT AND ENJOY THE MOMENT. BUT IF HE TELLS YOU HE AINT READY TO SETTLE DOWN THEN MOVE ON. AND STOP 🛑 TIMING HIM. YOU ARE NOT HIS BOSS
I definitely disagree with Steve here. Men CAN communicate well, CAN love and care for a woman well, in both platonic and romantic relationships.. I live it and I've seen it.. It's about time we stop saying men can't do this stuff because it is not true! They are indeed capable, the question is if they're willing. 🙏🏾
Hold on to your values young lady. Lots of women do NOT belive in fornication......The right man will come. You'll know him as soon as you see him girl.🙏🏼🌷....... Blessings
No,it is not a relationship.y'all friendly with each other,that's it. If it were more,he would at least offer to pay,at least one time.but all 5 times,you each paid your own way.
Go back on that dating site sis and go fish some more. If you don't, you are the one who's going to be hurting soon.. Trust me he's not ready for a relationship. A few more dates and you'll be catching feelings for him just to hear him say. We need to take a break, it's not you it's me.😒
This guy may like her company so he can have her ear, he's not ready for a relationship. Maybe the last woman used him financially and he's being cautious. She should accept being friends.
Y is Steve sending her off... RUN FOREST RUN! Listen that lady don’t got time to baby no “hurt” man. Everybody has been hurt in a relationship. I dated one guy and honestly felt like his therapist. All I did was waste my good years on him. Also STEVE a guy can still take it slow and pick up the check smh.
That better NOT be her Dad sitting next to her! There's no way I'd be able to listen to my daughter talk about this foolishness and hear someone give her advice to waste her time trying to fix or convince someone else!
She is setting the tone for the relationship. He is probably cheap and/or broke and would rather keep his money and not pay for her share of the bill. Plus a lot of men these days don't believe in paying unless they think they might get some.
Tyler Fugate -- Would you ever ghost on someone you wanted to see again? Me neither...you just didn’t make the cut. 😴It’s high time you accept this very fact and stop putting it under the guise of ‘she’s using me for a free meal’ because let’s face it. Unless you’ve met the person once before then no one can really ‘use’ you like that 😴
He is clearly not attracted to her if he were he would be pursuing her but she is the one who is pursuing so she is asking him out not the other way around
Listen candy cane. I had a good job and everything and was taking care of 1 women in my life. Never again. She was a user. She didn't want to clean, cook and complained I didn't spend enuff. She expected me to hire a maid. I told her straight to her face than what the hell do you do here your a useless human being. I cut her off completely and she ended up asking her dad for help. Your right guys should take care of a women who deserves it. Not the ones who don't give anything in return. I let her stay in my place, fed her, drove her places and she still had the audacity to say no when I wanted sex. If you want a guy to take care of you than he will except something back. Now I know she is not wifey material. In the end I stopped driving her and was enjoying to see her take the bus it made me happy. She left to her country after.
@@georgec8210 she's not wife material because she didn't cook, clean or give you sex whenever you wanted? I didn't realize women were only good for those 3 things and a woman DOES NOT HAVE TO HAVE SEX WHEN SHE DOESNT WANT TO!!! We aren't y'all's property. Maybe you're not husband material actually.
Him not paying the full bill should never be a dealbreaker, she should be more patient and stop wanting to be on television. Get to learn the man and learn yourself in the midst of the journey. If you want this thing to go fast because you want married sex, you're setting yourself up for failure. Learn Patience.
hmm... that is not the case. She has patience hence the reason she is still a virgin.Now what is happening is that she is in her 30s and her biological clock is ticking,she is not as pretty as she was when she was in her 20s so her chances of attracting a male is a lot harder.She wants to get married 1st because of her religion.Now if she doesn't get married she can't have sex which means she can't reproduce which means her gene dies with her.Now this guy that she hanged out with seem like a good guy to her probably the type that would marry women.Now the fact that she is celibate means she is inexperienced with men and dating.Which means she is going to waste time beating around the bush when she should be straightforward and say what she wants and if the guy ain't about it move on to the next if she doesn't do this her eggs will all go bad on her before she can use them
I applaud you young lady. Keep yourself safe till the man who is willing to give you his name comes. I waited 38 years, and he came and gave me his all.
@ this why I avoid men that say stuff like This. They usually have this misogynistic mindset with a lack of respect for women. If he says that women should pay half due to wanting equality RUN.. he probably bitter and broken and subconsciously hate and resent women. Don't bother.
what else can she do she is desperate and need to make babies. She is not getting any younger meaning her chances to attract a male is going to be hard especially with younger girls going for older men and by the time that relationship finishes her chances for getting children will be gone.Thats the sacrifice of the religion lol.
@@divinerae4966 yup it happens all the time women waste their 20s with the alpha men or the men they can't have long term relationships with then when they reach their 30s they get all desperate and say "where are all the good men?" meaning beta males- the men that make the money and have stable careers or jobs
Divine Rae --- & You men aren’t getting it. The men you are describing aren’t alpha. The alpha man is the provider man. Even in the animal kingdom and the REAL WORLD this is the case. Only on UA-cam is it the opposite. Why do you think most rich, successful men are usually married/provider types? Why do you think married men get the most women? They are the true alphas. Any woman cheating/ risking her true alpha provider Male with some loser player thug type is a very stupid woman that’s probably using him because her real alpha man is busy with his mistresses 😴
how come “we split the bill” is automatically a turn off about a man? I mean if you and him do end up together do you expect him to always and constantly pay for your AND his bill knowing you BOTH live in the same rooftop? ladies, if you want equality, then start thinking that men also can feel the same as us Maybe that guy deeply loved his ex-girlfriend, maybe his ex was not feeling the same, or wort case scenario, was a viscious woman who hurt and betrayed the guy. We don’t know the whole picture, but always be kind to people, either male or female.
I don't think it's just the splitting the cost situation that is bothering her. If I have to ask myself if you're interested and if this is a friendship or a relationship, obviously you are not clear about your intentions and how you feel about me. Paying for the bill is one of many ways a man let you know he's interested. If he's not paying the bill that's fine but is he showing her otherwise that he's in? Not really. Their "dates" also sound pretty casual, more on the friend side than the romantic side. My SO paid on the first date, I paid on the second, we've been taking turns or splitting it since, him paying slightly more often tho because he makes waaaaaaay more. I feel treated like a queen, not just because he pays but because he makes it clear that he is after me and wants me...
And why is he making her pay for someone else's mistake. She didn't break his heart. Not fair to her. If a person is broken from a past relationship fix yourself before moving on. Too much work. Sigh. 🙄
If he's been that hurt be shouldn't be dating, he should be seeing a counselor instead! If he says he's ready for a relationship but isn't really pushing that with you and he has friend zoned you then honey he doesn't see you in that role for him. MOVE ON! And Steve, you dropped the ball on this on! Smh...
lol She should try all options at this point she is in her 30s her biological clock ain't waiting on her.Plus her ability to attract a male is also declining
I love the Lord I really do, and I attend church every Sunday....HOWEVER I don't plan for my first date to be church and lunch and I have to pay my own lunch, basically that wasn't a date that was just lunch after church. Girl I got you when you stated the fact you was celibate over and over again; lady isn't trying to be celibate for that much longer, she's trying to get married to the RIGHT man and do what it do lol. I feel bad that the man got burned by another woman, but the vibes he is giving off is he's looking for help treating the burns not looking for a relationship. He needs time to heal and it doesn't seem like you want to wait until he is healed.
Steve did not answer the question about her splitting the bill with this man--4 times. Here's what I say: Split. Run.. Okay, this guy's been hurt, but when you go on a date with a lady, you pay. Even Steve said that before. He's cheap and using the "hurt" situation to justify why you should pay---and continue to pay for yourself. No dice. You're the prize and I disagree with Steve, you shouldn't have to convince a "grown man" that you're not going to hurt him. He's playing you. Get to thinking and stepping!
Steve is correct. He was just hurt really bad in a previous relationship. It will take time if she is patient. But if she cant go through it with him, then move on
@@penlavits3305 You have a point, that will happen if she's not sure what she wants. If no sex before marriage then no sex before marriage have the rules clear. She will have stronger feeling but its easier to give up than to try
@@khaedeenb1873 well at what cost meaning that would she rather give up having children than not having sex.Meaning that the smart sexy woman she is won't pass on her gene and it will end with her. unless she can adopts or get inseminated by getting donor sperm at the bank but I'm sure she wants all the husband benefits so why take that route
basically almost all of the Ask Steve Vids are a demonstration of how Steve is highly emotionally intelligent and how most people are struggling in this area
If he's been hurt and he's still tryna get right, then she does need to move on. There's nothing down that road for her. And, if he heals and eventually remembers how graceful, sweet, and celibate she was, then he may look her up again with a completely different purpose. if they're both available, then maybe something great can happen. But, do not be anyone's rebound unless you know they're emotionally free of that last heartbreak.
Leave him alone to heal and grow up on his own. Cut the loss now while it's still as early. You will find the man who is on the same journey as you who is healed, discerning and will want to treat you as Queen from the beginning.
I was so confused with this advice, I don't see why Steve changed his tone when she said she was celibate. Regardless, he should have paid for at least the first bill.
From a man's perspective here: He's not interested romantically. If he has gone out with you four times, and you guys have been to church and everything then you are in the friendzone. If you ba e communicated to him that you have no intention to hurt him and want to be with him and he still hasn't accepted you... then he has made up his mind that you are his friend! Period! Don't break your celibacy or compromise yourself for him. Either value him as a friend and keep looking for love or drop him altogether.
Girl tell that 30 year old boy bye...For you to pay for your own breakfast and dinner you could dine with your girlfriends or dine alone. Women get hurt all the time in their lives and they don't let it stop them from being caring and help each other as well as everyone the meet. Some of the most helpful and kindest people I have met in my travels were women.
@@Nikolaiwww well he got 3 divorces and majority of the women he help barely do a update and not a lot can say "Steve help my marriage/get me a man" It's rare
How will she get herself a man with money.what makes her worth marrying just to have sex with.She is not that pretty 1.How will she put up with the other women that don't require men to marry them to have sex 2.Men don't have biological clocks so they can reproduce at the time they get sperm to when they die where as her clock ticks the moment she gets her 1st period and gets worst when she reaches 30 if can't find a mate and her eggs go bad her gene dies with her
Also, her reason for getting married seems to be to end her sexual frustration and that is a big mistake. She needs to get that under control so she can think clearly because marriage is no joke. There are so many aspects one needs to pay attention to, to make sure you wont be thinking you made a mistake six months later that you cannot be blinded by a sexual haze. That spells disaster. Those hormones make a good marriage better and a bad marriage worse. So check that too honey. You so ready to get it on you cant see he's just not that into you.
He's not interested. Simple. He want you for COMPANIONSHIP not to build into a RELATIONSHIP. Being hurt has nothing to do with it because from experience and seeing other people's experiences if a guy is willing to make you his lady ? Nothing or no one can get in his way unless he allowed it to for the lack of inconsistency and not willing to change. Being hurt and paying for a date has nothing to do with it because if he really wanted you ? He would not have an issue paying for dinner from the first date till the last date. I've met a guy who was interested in me and was willing to spoil me while knowing I wasn't willing to take anything further even though he was expecting to change my mind (Yes I did accept the gifts). If a guy you're dating cannot do the simple task as in, pay for the bill ? Why would you want to spend anymore time dressing up, putting on a nice outfit, looking good for him, basically for nothing. You are the prize and he needs to do everything in his might to prove that to you. Might as well call one another friends or roommates because he's not catering to you at all especially a man who's 32. You're not his top priority and it's not rocket science when it comes to males and if it is then strap your seat belt tight and prepare for the emotional roller coaster. I wouldn't even call that a date just a little business meeting. Too many excuses this is 2019 and time for women to boss up or get played. He can't pay ? If he picked you up ? Book yourself a little Uber, wait for the waiter/waitress to come to the table, pay your half, and take a Uber home. If you drove ? Say you're going to use the restroom, get in your car, drive home, and send him a nice cute message about not seeing eye to eye with him, block him, and let that be.
Some ppl would Tell her to move on. But that's all good and fine. Anything worth having is worth investing in. Being celibate is GREAT. But win a man been hurt. It's NOT ur physical body he's worried about. It's his heart he's protecting. The choice is hers. Tread softly and make a adult decision. So she won't regret or blame him later
He sounds emotionally unavailable. I would give him some space, while continuing to date other men. If he's truly interested, he will find a way to conquer his fear and pursue you.
@chris mit Spot on! A relationship works better with two happy people who have given themselves time to heal from their traumas and learnt how to be happy on their own. Only a unity between those two might turn into somthing beatiful. Steve is telling this woman to desperatly sell herself to this man in the "unique" ways women have. Also they've just been on 5 dates. How can somebody commit after 5 dates?
Now I will agree that men should pick up the tab and it's obvious that this guy has been hurt. But to be completely honest, this woman is very selfish. In her mind after 4 dates, since she's ready he should be ready....thats selfish. Now if after revealing that she is celibate, he pushes for sex....what would that be? Selfish. She's got 2 options: either deal with it (its only been 4 dates), or walk away. But trying to FORCE things isn't how relationships work.
Take ur time. He's not putting a rush on things. If ur celibate, that's great. Ur sex isn't the big prize. U are the big prize. If he gets u. He gets all and the best of u. Just take ur time. Don't over think the situation
@@The_Maori_Taro_Planter He is guided by the Holy Spirit too because a lot of the things he says is from experience and he gives sound, Godly advice. Of course he makes mistakes... he's human too. It is good to hear counsel from our brothers & sisters in Christ
She looks good to you ? bro i am no alpha male but i believe i could do better i have seen women who are in their 40s that would challenge her in looks. My saying is if you look good things will happen for but if you don't and you don't got money your gene dies with you.
@@pattzwain4846 There are even less men who are willing to wait. I have not and will not engage in that intimate manner until I get married. End of story. It's best so when I do start dating, it will weed out the trashy manipulative guys out there.
Yea true but she better walk away and continue her advertising unless she won't find a mate.Note that she is 30 and her looks are fading . so her ability to attract a man is declining so is the ability to have children.
Wow you are critical what you descibed isnt all there is she has to meet someone who is on the same way of thinking so yeah she has to walk away but look for same minded man
We should not critizise but help someone to many people love to tell somebody what they think but shoe on the other foot is a different story and having children at an older sge isnt ideal but possible. she can still attract a good man when GOD makes it happen for her
Be friends first and get to know him better, don't rush things with him. There's an Ole school song 🎵 that says: if it don't fit, don't force it just relax and let it flow. Let the relationship flow.
She is the one wanting to give it up.Problem is she's sending signals.Do she want someone to respect the fact that she's celibate and take things slow or is sex of greater importance?
If you have to ask you already know the answer
dance4life1208 she wants to be on TV
That's what I said when I saw the title
I know right
Not really. Everything is about timing. It's like falling in love. Rarely do two people fall in love at the same time. She is well within her rights to ask him where does he see this situation going. It's only been a few dates and all she is wondering about is if he is interested in her in that way. She can simply have the conversation.
Exactly
Sis the fact that you have to ask means issa no. Move on and go fishing in the wide ocean.
JackieJacks it definitely seems to be a no. In this short conversation she’s talked about abstaining, biological clock ⏰, and how ready she is for relations. Out her own mouth, she displays her red flag 🚩 collection. But like a lot of women she has that I can convince him spirit. I hope ole dude has a Netflix account because it’s definitely about to be some chillin 😎
@@itwaswritten1196 PREACH!! I know too many women who come from the "sit and wait" approach. She really didn't sound like she was internally willing to reach out to "this man". It almost sounded like she would take "any man" who would make life easier for herself and if he happens to benefit from it too then that's just the icing. It don't entirely matter.
@@heddij.shiwani260 celibate
👍
I thought the same dang thing when I clicked on the video
She's going to love him right, heal his heart, get him to trust again......he is going to be right.....FOR THE NEXT WOMAN! Girl, MOVE ON! He doesn't need a girlfriend, he needs time and good therapist!
Tf
Your preaching. Because from my experience men will date a woman just to get his strength back. Once he get it back then he's GONE.
April Jones so true 👌..
🗣A little louder for the people in the back
Me. This was me
Steve: “How old is he?”
Audience member: “32”
Another audience member: “ HE GROWN !” 😂
Hahahahah. I heard that too!
🤣🤣🤣🤣
😂
I hollered 😹😹
Definitely a black womans voice😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
My advice would be for her to move on....
Well said,the only thing that would come from this is rebound sex.if he agrees to marry her she can finally have sex but no man in the USA that is smart would do that because the courts goes in favor of women. When she decides to get a divorce. Anyway she is going to have a hard time finding a man and it's so sad she waited till she was 30.I don't think god cares if a person get marries or not.The point of marriage is for passing on genes.But if you don't get married you can't reproduce wow that is rough.Adam and Eve were not married.They were the only 2 humans in the world so they just reproduced.Marriage lost its purpose long ago but people stick by it because of religion.She should try going for a common law marriage that's the only way a man would get involved with a marriage if it doesn't involve the state.
Stupid advice. Steve just told you whats up.
he's with her to heal and once he feels better, he's gone to someone else he really likes. let this one go, woman and find someone who is ready. it's not your job to fix him
unfortunately, the fact is women in their 30s find it hard to get men their age why ? well because they aren't as pretty as they were when they were in their 20s plus what drives them in their 30s is the need to reproduce and some men like to wait a few years before they do that but women don't have that time their biological clock ticks as she ages which makes her very desperate
The right way to get a male is when your in your 20s you make sure to lock him down and mold him into what they want as a potential mate so that when the get into their 30s they can just make babies
but starting to find a man at 30 is hard because women don't look as good as they were in their 20s and men are visual creatures we link beauty to good eggs
Pen Lavits Straight Facts
TheSunshinefee exactly! Happened to me. Never again!
@@QueenStylin Just so you know, males pursue women they like. If the guy isn't trying to please you or make you like him. Then your wasting your time.Now if you play hard to get that is one way to keep him on the trail but the moment he thinks your not interested he will lose all interest in the pursuit. Females should never pursue males it just means that he is not interested hence the reason why he didn't invest any money or time.
@@QueenStylin If a lamb presents itself in front of a lion the lion will gladly eat it otherwise it will see it but not see it .Hope you catching what i am saying. Just in case you didn't it doesn't matter if he can see you he doesn't care but if you appear and serve yourself to him he will be happy to strip you of your meat.
Never convince or prove to a man that you are worthy of being courted properly. He either wants to impress you or he doesn’t.
This is so true and a hard lesson to learn sometimes 😩
No man should have to impress you smh...silly ass
Misutasutanto -- You do if you approached her. Otherwise...keep it moving 😴
Men are visual creatures.They are attracted to beautiful women and the fact that she wants to get married to have sex means she has to prove why she is worth getting married to when other women are giving up sex without the need for marriage.What makes her special from all the rest.That is what she has to prove.Unless she is wasting her time
@@candykane5442 Right? Smh these men here seem to want to put no effort into dating/courting a woman... it's sad these days and this is coming from an early 20s girl
Gurl, leave the construction projects to a professional. Don't waste your time on someone who's not in the head space to be in a trusting, committed relationship
As I heard somewhere, ain’t no time for build-a-boyfriends
Ha ha, new term I've learned 😂.
Said perfectly
Lol....."leave the construction projects to the professionals"..I love it!
My slogan is "I am not a charity, I don't do projects"
@@mora_007 🤣🤣🤣 I love your slogan!
He needs you as a bandage so he can heal for the women he really wants. She’s probably counseling him emotionally. When he heals he’s out sweetie. 😢
Gwen Valdes This is the best comment!
Gwen Valdes yeeeaassss. Now you need to be on Steve’s show because your comment right here is the truth!
Wisest comment
@@Osteen529 For real. The best comment Ever.
Yup, rebound sex.She want this to work because 1 she realized her market value is in a sharp decline meaning her ability to attract a man is dropping quickly. 2 Her biological clock is ticking and if she doesn't find a mate soon to pass on her genes.Then her gene is out of the pool.It ends with her.Thats why she so desperate for it to work.
Girl you're too beautiful to be fixing something that is broken!
I need grown women to get a clue 🙄🙄🙄🙄 he’s not interested. Btw women are not rehabilitation centers for broken men. Find someone else
chris mit HELLO!!!!!!!! THANK YOU!!!!!!!
FR FR👊
chris mit 🙌🏾🙌🏾
Queen Scorpion was that you?
The realest comment I’ve seen on UA-cam all year.
I wish my wife could have seen some of these videos. It would have helped our marriage out a lot more than those stupid marriage counselors we went to. She's not with us anymore, and I'm sure she's a lot happier now. RIP Michelle.
She set the standard. Why keep going out with a man who isn’t paying for the date? And this bothers you. Nope.
Well it's very simple.She is inexperienced and desperate.She seems to be in her 30s and she has not found someone yet to marry her.Her biological clock is ticking and right now this guy gave her a little attention. She see potential in this guy to marry her so she can have sex and start a family.But she is a little late to the game like most women in their 30s who had fun in their 20s they all ask "where are all the good men" that is the mistake most women continue to make lol.
@@penlavits3305 Yep. They wait expecting something magical to happen when they are 30
@@chrissalley9468This is so true and if they don't find a mate their genes end with them unless they go to the sperm bank which would be a good move if they can handle it financially but in the sense of ensuring their gene live on
bleah
So the man has to pay the bill on a date?
The issue is that it sounds like he's on a rebound. Never date someone who's still caught up with their ex because you can bet your last buck that ex is still lurking in the shadows. You're just going to be his back-up plan until he gets the woman he really has his eye on. In a relationship you should never have to act like someone's mother or their therapist. Girl get you a man who has his life together.
period.
& there are some men that are honest and say that they want a relationship but just not with you
I wish I could be this clear with men, but I always think it's gonna hurt their feelings so I come up with some other reason
Why are you even still interested in him : \
She's desperate!
By the info she gave she is in her 30s and biological clock ticking and right now to her this man seems like the best choice at the moment that is why she wants to make it work but little does she know is that at 30 her attractiveness declines and the amount of men she can attract becomes harder and harder as she ages and he is in his 30s he could still mess around with someone in their 20s but by how she behaving she is ready to settle with the beta male and mate with him if possible #thegenemustliveon
@@penlavits3305 I hearYa.. No excuse though.
@@user-zx5xw4yw2e Well imagine if you met someone who you thought was cool and you realized hey this person has a lot of virtues that would make a good mate to have children with. Wouldn't you try to make it happen.Knowing that the possibility exists that you won't find someone like this ever again
@@penlavits3305 That doesn't apply to this case here. What virtues n qualities are so great about this man. He took her on a date n allowed her to pay, 👎 👎. But to answer the question uposed: No I would not if its one-sided.
I usually agree with Steve. But she a legit Christian so she doing what the Bible says. Sex is for marriage. It really is . I have fornicated in the past and it feel good at the moment, but in all honesty . It’s nothing like saving yourself for your spouse. Me and the woman I married was celibate 4 years before we met each other. Was it easy? No, but if you really trust God he can strengthen you. I know it’s taught that all men want is sex and it’s impossible to practice purity. Apart from God yes it is impossible, but with God he will strengthen you. I use to think it was impossible. Why would God tell you to do something that’s impossible. If you turn your life to him he will empower you with the Holy Spirit to live a life pleasing to him. Do that mean you won’t sin? No, but your heart towards it will change
Wow this was well said Theron and thanks for your words of experience
Amen
Amen Theron. Purity is such a rariety in a sex saturated society, but it's always worth it being in God's will. No shame in my game
I COMPLETELY agree. Theron you're obviously speaking from experience. I know because I am experiencing this same strength from God to WAIT!! At this point I trust God totally with my whole heart. He has a PERFECT track record and He ain't failed me yet. Me on the other hand I have a 100% failure rate at picking a man and doing things MY way. But only TRUE believers will understand this and I've learned that even those are far and few between. I hate that Steve's tone was a bit condescending and made this young lady shrink back in her confession of celibacy. It's a beautiful thing that her husband will LOVE and RESPECT her for one day!
Clearly the man just doesn't want to be with her.
Men spend money things they value. He's not even ready to pay for a meal for her. Say Bye.
This response is stupid and shortsighted. Because she pays her own way she keeps control of what she will or will not do. If she tries of him she can leave with a clear conscience. It's not always about him, women need to set standards and not deviate based on getting things. Be strong sis you deserve a man worthy of you...don't settle
@@truthsavant6005 If you're dating a man, and paying for your "dinner date" that in my opinion is what is stupid. I can take myself to dinner. Again men pay for things that they care about, or interest them. Sorry if you're unaware.
@@Hayya45 I understood your point the first time, saying it twice doesn't make it true. It makes it twice as stupid.
Not a man's job to pay for a meal if he wants to spilt shows he has true interest not looking for nothing in return quit male bashing the guy
So when a woman pays for a man you nope out
But when a man pays for a woman it’s normal?
That’s not equal...
Just the fact he paid half girl go out with your friends to pay your half
But what she is looking for is a male to fertilize her eggs not people to hang out with the fact that she is celibate means she very inexperienced which means she will waste her time pursuing men that won't commit plus her biological clock is ticking if she want to have children she got to make it happen with someone she can attract if she can't her gene dies with her
Pen Lavits 😂
I see most women are actually looking for free meals.
@@ramseyabsessien8990 WOW. SEXIST AND WRONG. You have no idea what it is to be a woman. NO IDEA AT ALL. He makes more money then women, he will make it back faster then women! Plus women already pay more to live. Women have NEEDS, not want to shop, NEEDS OR society expectations. Dresses, heals, pantyhose, must shave. Bras and underwear. Guys only have underwear, don't have to shave. The list is absolutely endless, she pays far more then you do buddy in money and time to get ready. So you can pay for date(S), it won't be equal but it will help some. So yeah she deserves free meals.
@@nofybn7794 amen sista!!!!
Sounds to me like he's emotionally unavailable. If I were her I'd move on.
Its only been a week maybe shes too emotional
I love when Steve is confused because his facial expressions are hilarious 😆
Homeboy hasn’t been hurt, homeboy is stingy
Steve gives decent advise but I disagree with this. If the man has been hurt she DOES NOT need to waste time trying to prove anything. If he isn't interested in her, she will just be spinning her wheels while stringing her along. "I want to be in a relationship" is not the same as "I want to be in a relationship with YOU" don't get it twisted. Then it seemed as if Steve was insinuating that she should sleep with the man to convince him she won't hurt him? WRONG again. That will only create a soul tie and muddy the waters even more. This young lady needs to MOVE ON! She's on the right path by preserving herself intil marriage. The man God has for her will PURSUE her and there will be no question as to whether or not he's for her. Furthermore if she seeks God about ANY potential mate, she'll ALWAYS be given the right answer!!
That's all nice and everything but this woman in her 30s she don't have time to be waiting unless she doesn't care about passing on her genes and if that's the case wait and let your eggs go bad by the time the man get there she has to get to know him 1 then she has to get married 2 then after 1 year of trying to have a baby with her age increasing that's going to be hard she may not even have kids.
The whole point of marriage in the old time days was to have kids
talawoods25 amen, thank you for your thoughtful comment! God bless you!
@@AngeliqueHenderson You're so very welcome. I'm a woman that is chosing my purity over a "relationship" too and Steve was out of line for his response. We shouldn't be shamed for taking a stand for righteousness. Everyone won't understand but the RIGHT one will appreciate it. A virtuous woman is precious and her value surpasses all others. Be blessed 🙏
@@penlavits3305 Not just to have kids but was a business contract between state government as it is today. People think marriage is something God invented, which he never did in the first place. Gd joined Adam and Eve spiritually. Marriage was later invented by men via states and gverment practices.
She said “he doesn’t believe me” and I said “then bounce!”
I'm so grateful for this comment section. You guys are motivation.
Stop telling men that yall are saving yourself JUST LIVE IT...LET YOUR ACTIONS SPEAK
Unless you want a relationship with that person they obviously need to say it so the guy can find someone else who ain’t sullabite or whatever.
@@tommycastro9424 I've said it too early and it ruins things. Wait it out. Wait until the person loves you.
Thandeka Buthelezi that’s called settling and while waiting may work it will also push other potential relationships away and the risk of waiting for nothing wasting your time.
No honey he's not looking for a relationship he's looking for help.
How cause he split the bill?
Help with what?
What kind of help?
Crystal Unique could it be help with algebgra?
Have to dissagre. Seems like he playing safe not to get hurt, but they had some conversations...and he still there. He likes her. He might need help allso getting over stuff, but that is something a theraphist should tacle. But that dont mean they cant walk together.
Even before I hear what Steve has to say, I know a real man will pay the bill... as long as the guy is totally interested ...even broke... he will make means to impress and pay the damn bill!!!
HE IS LOOKING FOR RELATIONSHIP BUT AS STEVE SAID HE IS HURT 😢 YOU HAVE TO BE PATIENT AND ENJOY THE MOMENT. BUT IF HE TELLS YOU HE AINT READY TO SETTLE DOWN THEN MOVE ON. AND STOP 🛑 TIMING HIM. YOU ARE NOT HIS BOSS
Finally balanced point fair to him and her not just gut checking the guy good comment
I definitely disagree with Steve here. Men CAN communicate well, CAN love and care for a woman well, in both platonic and romantic relationships.. I live it and I've seen it.. It's about time we stop saying men can't do this stuff because it is not true! They are indeed capable, the question is if they're willing. 🙏🏾
You are 100% right!
He already ain't even making an effort to pay the bill🤨 Miss allow yourself to dodge that bullet...
Equality right?🤷🏽♂️
Why would I pay the bill if you're celebit? Does be have to pay all the bills all the way up until they are married?
Yes.. because its all about the money... thats what you call a man buying a woman. Its the 20th century people.
@@canogaparque818 wrong dusty 😂
@@Jackywitha_y 🤷🏽♂️🤷🏽♂️
Look at the black lady making faces behind her 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
LMBO ,😂 😂😂 😂
What’s the time stamp?
Mary Gitiha 3:14 is hilarious 🤣
😅😂
omg I noticed that too. maybe she knows her . she acts like she heard it all before
Hold on to your values young lady. Lots of women do NOT belive in fornication......The right man will come. You'll know him as soon as you see him girl.🙏🏼🌷....... Blessings
Most do fornicate. In fact I would 93 to 94 percent.
No,it is not a relationship.y'all friendly with each other,that's it. If it were more,he would at least offer to pay,at least one time.but all 5 times,you each paid your own way.
That's not how that works. You just want it like that because it Benifits you.
rochelle thundercloud or he’s just cheap
So much for “equality “
He's not putting her in position when like oh he paid. And he's trying not get broke behind a woman before he knows real deal cut out male bashing
DEMETRIUS blaze it’s got to be “the real deal” before he pays for the meal on the first date?!? C’mon
Go back on that dating site sis and go fish some more.
If you don't, you are the one who's going to be hurting soon..
Trust me he's not ready for a relationship.
A few more dates and you'll be catching feelings for him just to hear him say. We need to take a break, it's not you it's me.😒
Lmbo
@@tommyt264 ❤
I love how Steve’s audience is so church oriented. “Let the church say amen...” lol 😂
This guy may like her company so he can have her ear, he's not ready for a relationship. Maybe the last woman used him financially and he's being cautious. She should accept being friends.
Yeah, seems like he needs a therapist and not a girlfriend.
@@Ms_T_Perfectly_Imperfect , most definitely
No new friends. Either you’re in or out, not a ‘male friend’
He's not paying because she's not giving it up, he playing around he's not hurt.
Bingo!!!
That was my thought too
exactly
so is that a bad thing ?
Y is Steve sending her off... RUN FOREST RUN! Listen that lady don’t got time to baby no “hurt” man. Everybody has been hurt in a relationship.
I dated one guy and honestly felt like his therapist. All I did was waste my good years on him.
Also STEVE a guy can still take it slow and pick up the check smh.
That better NOT be her Dad sitting next to her! There's no way I'd be able to listen to my daughter talk about this foolishness and hear someone give her advice to waste her time trying to fix or convince someone else!
She is setting the tone for the relationship. He is probably cheap and/or broke and would rather keep his money and not pay for her share of the bill. Plus a lot of men these days don't believe in paying unless they think they might get some.
Or cause most women only use a guy for free food and also use him as a walking atm
Tyler Fugate -- Would you ever ghost on someone you wanted to see again? Me neither...you just didn’t make the cut. 😴It’s high time you accept this very fact and stop putting it under the guise of ‘she’s using me for a free meal’ because let’s face it. Unless you’ve met the person once before then no one can really ‘use’ you like that 😴
He is clearly not attracted to her if he were he would be pursuing her but she is the one who is pursuing so she is asking him out not the other way around
Listen candy cane. I had a good job and everything and was taking care of 1 women in my life. Never again. She was a user. She didn't want to clean, cook and complained I didn't spend enuff. She expected me to hire a maid. I told her straight to her face than what the hell do you do here your a useless human being. I cut her off completely and she ended up asking her dad for help. Your right guys should take care of a women who deserves it. Not the ones who don't give anything in return. I let her stay in my place, fed her, drove her places and she still had the audacity to say no when I wanted sex. If you want a guy to take care of you than he will except something back. Now I know she is not wifey material. In the end I stopped driving her and was enjoying to see her take the bus it made me happy. She left to her country after.
@@georgec8210 she's not wife material because she didn't cook, clean or give you sex whenever you wanted? I didn't realize women were only good for those 3 things and a woman DOES NOT HAVE TO HAVE SEX WHEN SHE DOESNT WANT TO!!! We aren't y'all's property. Maybe you're not husband material actually.
Him not paying the full bill should never be a dealbreaker, she should be more patient and stop wanting to be on television. Get to learn the man and learn yourself in the midst of the journey. If you want this thing to go fast because you want married sex, you're setting yourself up for failure. Learn Patience.
hmm... that is not the case. She has patience hence the reason she is still a virgin.Now what is happening is that she is in her 30s and her biological clock is ticking,she is not as pretty as she was when she was in her 20s so her chances of attracting a male is a lot harder.She wants to get married 1st because of her religion.Now if she doesn't get married she can't have sex which means she can't reproduce which means her gene dies with her.Now this guy that she hanged out with seem like a good guy to her probably the type that would marry women.Now the fact that she is celibate means she is inexperienced with men and dating.Which means she is going to waste time beating around the bush when she should be straightforward and say what she wants and if the guy ain't about it move on to the next if she doesn't do this her eggs will all go bad on her before she can use them
@@penlavits3305 thank you for thoroughly explaining her predicament because everyone is just judging her
He ain't interested you if he didn't pay the bills if you agree hit the like bottom
I agree. Sounds like he's trying to to lower her standards. The evidence of real love is always the presence of joy.
And that came from a man. I would see him as a friend only and let not get the feelings be in it. ..
I agree ☝️ men are providers especially the beginning stages. If he ain’t paying at that stage he ain’t into ya
@@mard7880 daaamn right
Agree
I believe she will successfully move on to a better match.
Well done for holding your Christian values! God is pleased x
...but it doesn't get her anywhere...
Amen!!
@@mssummerrose1 as long as God is pleased that's all that matters. U should not please Men
@@keked9231 Hallelujah! I’m a Christian and waiting until marriage. I’m honoring God!
"I'm young and I'm celibate and ready for love"
Steve's reaction throw me of 😂🤣😂🤣
I applaud you young lady. Keep yourself safe till the man who is willing to give you his name comes.
I waited 38 years, and he came and gave me his all.
That's wonderful. I waited 35
Are you serious sis🤦why is the bar set so low? You paying half, every time? WTF
She is pursuing him not the other way around.Which says a lot about how desperate she is to find a mate
Why should he have to pay in full if she never has to? Goldiggers...
@@wizeyy You sound so unmasculine.
Women like you only want equality when it suits you. Thank you for exposing yourself.
@ this why I avoid men that say stuff like This. They usually have this misogynistic mindset with a lack of respect for women. If he says that women should pay half due to wanting equality RUN.. he probably bitter and broken and subconsciously hate and resent women. Don't bother.
Steve contradicts himself often. Honey he goes dutch with you on each date. He does not like you.
Girl don’t get married for sex, re-think your thoughts and actions because you need to date before you married and get to learn someone.🤦♀️
what else can she do she is desperate and need to make babies. She is not getting any younger meaning her chances to attract a male is going to be hard especially with younger girls going for older men and by the time that relationship finishes her chances for getting children will be gone.Thats the sacrifice of the religion lol.
Pen Lavits lol...ok
@@divinerae4966 yup it happens all the time women waste their 20s with the alpha men or the men they can't have long term relationships with then when they reach their 30s they get all desperate and say "where are all the good men?" meaning beta males- the men that make the money and have stable careers or jobs
Pen Lavits interesting.
Divine Rae --- & You men aren’t getting it. The men you are describing aren’t alpha. The alpha man is the provider man. Even in the animal kingdom and the REAL WORLD this is the case. Only on UA-cam is it the opposite. Why do you think most rich, successful men are usually married/provider types? Why do you think married men get the most women? They are the true alphas. Any woman cheating/ risking her true alpha provider Male with some loser player thug type is a very stupid woman that’s probably using him because her real alpha man is busy with his mistresses 😴
I'm Jamaican. Jamaican women are NOT into splitting bills. We will 'offer' but dont you dare take us up on the offer, boi. IJS
That’s rather selfish is it not?
@@AltNova are you a man?
@@dammee Yeh
@@AltNova No, it is NOT.
@@AltNova Then you have NO IDEA WOMEN'S LIVES COST SO MUCH MORE!!
he is damaged goods, that man is not going to spend money on her, because she is not giving up the goodie . BOY BYE!!!!!
how come “we split the bill” is automatically a turn off about a man?
I mean if you and him do end up together do you expect him to always and constantly pay for your AND his bill knowing you BOTH live in the same rooftop?
ladies, if you want equality, then start thinking that men also can feel the same as us
Maybe that guy deeply loved his ex-girlfriend, maybe his ex was not feeling the same, or wort case scenario, was a viscious woman who hurt and betrayed the guy.
We don’t know the whole picture, but always be kind to people, either male or female.
Stephanie Cunanan I love u.
broke ass
You well spoken 👍 I agree with you. Splitting bill is a turn off. I see it as a joke.
@@BybiGurl1 gold digger
I don't think it's just the splitting the cost situation that is bothering her. If I have to ask myself if you're interested and if this is a friendship or a relationship, obviously you are not clear about your intentions and how you feel about me. Paying for the bill is one of many ways a man let you know he's interested. If he's not paying the bill that's fine but is he showing her otherwise that he's in? Not really. Their "dates" also sound pretty casual, more on the friend side than the romantic side. My SO paid on the first date, I paid on the second, we've been taking turns or splitting it since, him paying slightly more often tho because he makes waaaaaaay more. I feel treated like a queen, not just because he pays but because he makes it clear that he is after me and wants me...
Lady stop wasting your time already, just move on.
And why is he making her pay for someone else's mistake. She didn't break his heart. Not fair to her. If a person is broken from a past relationship fix yourself before moving on. Too much work. Sigh. 🙄
If he's been that hurt be shouldn't be dating, he should be seeing a counselor instead! If he says he's ready for a relationship but isn't really pushing that with you and he has friend zoned you then honey he doesn't see you in that role for him. MOVE ON! And Steve, you dropped the ball on this on! Smh...
🗣 stop dating online
Ok👋
C0co Chan3L why?
lol She should try all options at this point she is in her 30s her biological clock ain't waiting on her.Plus her ability to attract a male is also declining
I love the Lord I really do, and I attend church every Sunday....HOWEVER I don't plan for my first date to be church and lunch and I have to pay my own lunch, basically that wasn't a date that was just lunch after church. Girl I got you when you stated the fact you was celibate over and over again; lady isn't trying to be celibate for that much longer, she's trying to get married to the RIGHT man and do what it do lol. I feel bad that the man got burned by another woman, but the vibes he is giving off is he's looking for help treating the burns not looking for a relationship. He needs time to heal and it doesn't seem like you want to wait until he is healed.
Such a balanced response. 😌
Steve did not answer the question about her splitting the bill with this man--4 times. Here's what I say: Split. Run.. Okay, this guy's been hurt, but when you go on a date with a lady, you pay. Even Steve said that before. He's cheap and using the "hurt" situation to justify why you should pay---and continue to pay for yourself. No dice. You're the prize and I disagree with Steve, you shouldn't have to convince a "grown man" that you're not going to hurt him. He's playing you. Get to thinking and stepping!
Nope i don't think he is cheap ,this is just what happens when females pursue men who aren't interested in them.
Steve is correct. He was just hurt really bad in a previous relationship. It will take time if she is patient. But if she cant go through it with him, then move on
@@penlavits3305 You have a point, that will happen if she's not sure what she wants. If no sex before marriage then no sex before marriage have the rules clear. She will have stronger feeling but its easier to give up than to try
@@khaedeenb1873 well at what cost meaning that would she rather give up having children than not having sex.Meaning that the smart sexy woman she is won't pass on her gene and it will end with her. unless she can adopts or get inseminated by getting donor sperm at the bank but I'm sure she wants all the husband benefits so why take that route
Sis, go ahead and end this now. She doesn't seem like she's in this for the long haul. Don't waste his time or your own. Move. On.
If I have to pay, I will consider you just a friend.
20HAIB Your question doesn’t make sense.
You are in girl friend zone.
Then why go on the date if he's just a friend?
Golddigger
basically almost all of the Ask Steve Vids are a demonstration of how Steve is highly emotionally intelligent and how most people are struggling in this area
If he's been hurt and he's still tryna get right, then she does need to move on. There's nothing down that road for her. And, if he heals and eventually remembers how graceful, sweet, and celibate she was, then he may look her up again with a completely different purpose. if they're both available, then maybe something great can happen. But, do not be anyone's rebound unless you know they're emotionally free of that last heartbreak.
Both of you ,put your cards on the table , find out what the next step is . If your not on the same page , move on.❤❤
I like that too. Q
She's pretty. Don't settle sis.
Leave him alone to heal and grow up on his own. Cut the loss now while it's still as early. You will find the man who is on the same journey as you who is healed, discerning and will want to treat you as Queen from the beginning.
👏👏👏👏👏🔥🔥🔥🔥❤❤❤❤❤
I like this girl. She is made of gold.
N my own humble opinion I don't think he's interested...However She can easily find out thou...Good luck
She's already found out. Shes in denial.
T G
Probably right
she stringing her own self along
Yup its very clear he ain't interested.The fact he didn't pay says a lot because they met each other 4 times.
My feeling exactly.
I was so confused with this advice, I don't see why Steve changed his tone when she said she was celibate. Regardless, he should have paid for at least the first bill.
Right? Like I hope Steve's not relating sex (or the lack thereof) to being a decent human being/gentleman
Men trip me out when they get hurt! They shut EVERYTHING DOWN! 🤪🤪🤪
From a man's perspective here: He's not interested romantically. If he has gone out with you four times, and you guys have been to church and everything then you are in the friendzone. If you ba e communicated to him that you have no intention to hurt him and want to be with him and he still hasn't accepted you... then he has made up his mind that you are his friend! Period! Don't break your celibacy or compromise yourself for him. Either value him as a friend and keep looking for love or drop him altogether.
Girl tell that 30 year old boy bye...For you to pay for your own breakfast and dinner you could dine with your girlfriends or dine alone. Women get hurt all the time in their lives and they don't let it stop them from being caring and help each other as well as everyone the meet. Some of the most helpful and kindest people I have met in my travels were women.
I wonder how often Steve`s advice work?
Allways. He's God.
@@Nikolaiwww well he got 3 divorces and majority of the women he help barely do a update and not a lot can say "Steve help my marriage/get me a man" It's rare
@@UndergroundZoneFirst of all...my comment was a joke.
@@Nikolaiwww I know 💀. I would hope
Nikolaiwww he’s not God, but 9/10 uncle Steve is right
She deserve someone much better and surely she going to get the best..
Amen
She makes herself desperate and he wasnt into her. Get yourself a man with money girl stop selling yourself short
How will she get herself a man with money.what makes her worth marrying just to have sex with.She is not that pretty 1.How will she put up with the other women that don't require men to marry them to have sex 2.Men don't have biological clocks so they can reproduce at the time they get sperm to when they die where as her clock ticks the moment she gets her 1st period and gets worst when she reaches 30 if can't find a mate and her eggs go bad her gene dies with her
He already put her in the friend zone...Move forward...
Also, her reason for getting married seems to be to end her sexual frustration and that is a big mistake. She needs to get that under control so she can think clearly because marriage is no joke. There are so many aspects one needs to pay attention to, to make sure you wont be thinking you made a mistake six months later that you cannot be blinded by a sexual haze. That spells disaster. Those hormones make a good marriage better and a bad marriage worse. So check that too honey. You so ready to get it on you cant see he's just not that into you.
Preach
🔊Get to thinking❗😂
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All you ladies in the comments here helped me out so much more this time than the actual video. Ox
He's not interested. Simple. He want you for COMPANIONSHIP not to build into a RELATIONSHIP. Being hurt has nothing to do with it because from experience and seeing other people's experiences if a guy is willing to make you his lady ? Nothing or no one can get in his way unless he allowed it to for the lack of inconsistency and not willing to change. Being hurt and paying for a date has nothing to do with it because if he really wanted you ? He would not have an issue paying for dinner from the first date till the last date. I've met a guy who was interested in me and was willing to spoil me while knowing I wasn't willing to take anything further even though he was expecting to change my mind (Yes I did accept the gifts).
If a guy you're dating cannot do the simple task as in, pay for the bill ? Why would you want to spend anymore time dressing up, putting on a nice outfit, looking good for him, basically for nothing. You are the prize and he needs to do everything in his might to prove that to you. Might as well call one another friends or roommates because he's not catering to you at all especially a man who's 32. You're not his top priority and it's not rocket science when it comes to males and if it is then strap your seat belt tight and prepare for the emotional roller coaster. I wouldn't even call that a date just a little business meeting. Too many excuses this is 2019 and time for women to boss up or get played.
He can't pay ? If he picked you up ? Book yourself a little Uber, wait for the waiter/waitress to come to the table, pay your half, and take a Uber home.
If you drove ? Say you're going to use the restroom, get in your car, drive home, and send him a nice cute message about not seeing eye to eye with him, block him, and let that be.
Well said👏👏👏
He might be on the fence about dating a celibate woman. & going out with a celibate woman is basically the same thing as being friendzoned.
Some ppl would Tell her to move on. But that's all good and fine. Anything worth having is worth investing in. Being celibate is GREAT. But win a man been hurt. It's NOT ur physical body he's worried about. It's his heart he's protecting. The choice is hers. Tread softly and make a adult decision. So she won't regret or blame him later
He sounds emotionally unavailable. I would give him some space, while continuing to date other men. If he's truly interested, he will find a way to conquer his fear and pursue you.
@chris mit
Spot on! A relationship works better with two happy people who have given themselves time to heal from their traumas and learnt how to be happy on their own. Only a unity between those two might turn into somthing beatiful.
Steve is telling this woman to desperatly sell herself to this man in the "unique" ways women have.
Also they've just been on 5 dates. How can somebody commit after 5 dates?
Now I will agree that men should pick up the tab and it's obvious that this guy has been hurt. But to be completely honest, this woman is very selfish. In her mind after 4 dates, since she's ready he should be ready....thats selfish. Now if after revealing that she is celibate, he pushes for sex....what would that be? Selfish. She's got 2 options: either deal with it (its only been 4 dates), or walk away. But trying to FORCE things isn't how relationships work.
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Fair enough. Its obvious she is trying to make something where there is nothing.
Take ur time. He's not putting a rush on things. If ur celibate, that's great. Ur sex isn't the big prize. U are the big prize. If he gets u. He gets all and the best of u. Just take ur time. Don't over think the situation
hell no
Good things take time.
Dead in the point! Why she's complicating things? I'M HORNY STEVE!!! Just say it plain and simple!
Stay blessed Mr Hightower 🙏
Damn!! The lady in the back didn’t even say amen! 😂 she just shaking her head! 🤣
What does God say in conformation through the Holy Spirit ? 💁🏾♂️
Amen, so true
If all people were asking the Holy Spirit for guidance then no one would be asking Steve lol
The Chrysalis God still will use some people that are putting God first. Like Steve.
@@The_Maori_Taro_Planter He is guided by the Holy Spirit too because a lot of the things he says is from experience and he gives sound, Godly advice. Of course he makes mistakes... he's human too. It is good to hear counsel from our brothers & sisters in Christ
@@QG_TheRemnant Wow, was just writing a reply at the same time you said it! This is definitely a word
She is so pretty and red looks great on her!
Young, Celibate and ready for love girl you so gorgeous as for me it's like girls don't want to be with someone like me
There is a reason?
She looks good to you ? bro i am no alpha male but i believe i could do better i have seen women who are in their 40s that would challenge her in looks. My saying is if you look good things will happen for but if you don't and you don't got money your gene dies with you.
@@penlavits3305 money ain't a problem for me if love is there then material things don't make me feel happy than knowing someone out there cares
@@rebecca4829 yes and I do respect her stand to wait for the right guy nowadays its hard finding women that are ready to wait
@@pattzwain4846
There are even less men who are willing to wait. I have not and will not engage in that intimate manner until I get married. End of story. It's best so when I do start dating, it will weed out the trashy manipulative guys out there.
This is good advice I needed to hear this from Steve about his reason why
Dont break that celebacey to make him feel assured Sister keep it real
Yea true but she better walk away and continue her advertising unless she won't find a mate.Note that she is 30 and her looks are fading . so her ability to attract a man is declining so is the ability to have children.
Wow you are critical what you descibed isnt all there is she has to meet someone who is on the same way of thinking so yeah she has to walk away but look for same minded man
@@barryp9463 If by critical you mean realistic that is what i am
@@barryp9463 if you don't criticize people when they are wrong they just keep making the same mistakes
We should not critizise but help someone to many people love to tell somebody what they think but shoe on the other foot is a different story and having children at an older sge isnt ideal but possible. she can still attract a good man when GOD makes it happen for her
Be friends first and get to know him better, don't rush things with him. There's an Ole school song 🎵 that says: if it don't fit, don't force it just relax and let it flow. Let the relationship flow.
Slow down and go with the flow.
Thanks Steve. I'm learning.
He sees you as equal!
You women always yelling for equality, but when it comes to paying the bill all of a sudden equality going down the toilet.
bobdebelix 😂😂😂 thats true!
Yup
He just want her to break the celibacy. Don't fall for it. Let him go and move on to a more serious worthy guy.
She is the one wanting to give it up.Problem is she's sending signals.Do she want someone to respect the fact that she's celibate and take things slow or is sex of greater importance?