I Forced Open My Marriage and Lost My Husband.

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  • Опубліковано 21 гру 2024

КОМЕНТАРІ • 1,2 тис.

  • @badgerapocalyps2546
    @badgerapocalyps2546 Рік тому +402

    Back in the day we called 'open relationships' being single.

    • @frank1fm634
      @frank1fm634 Рік тому +6

      Badger you're wrong.I'm a 72YO WM.Back in the day they were "swingers" or "swinger couple.

    • @alexcunningham1647
      @alexcunningham1647 Рік тому

      ​@@frank1fm634 unlike open relationships swingers are usually doing it with similar partners and usually at big old orgy's so a very alternative lifestyle sure but even swingers won't abide an extramarital affair that they didn't agree to now they may be way more willing to forgive it because of what they do but on a very general level they don't see what they are doing "as a couple" should be counted the same way that their individual choices are

    • @DCD762
      @DCD762 Рік тому +20

      ​@@frank1fm634 swingers only date other couples.
      They never go after singles because of the unfairness of dating a single leaving the other partners in disadvantage.
      You clearly dk what swinging is

    • @jayh6135
      @jayh6135 Рік тому +13

      @@frank1fm634old head vibes 😂 The internet exists for a reason, do your research on the difference between being a disloyal cheater and swinging

    • @ianesgrecia8568
      @ianesgrecia8568 Рік тому +9

      @@frank1fm634 That is actually a insult to swingers. They at least have some form of restriction

  • @annsheridan12
    @annsheridan12 Рік тому +182

    Brilliant example of “ a woman honors her feelings over all else”, husband, family, etc.

    • @badgerden7080
      @badgerden7080 Рік тому +12

      And this is a woman admitting this. Very rare!

    • @Aki-kh2qe-StreetKidZZZ
      @Aki-kh2qe-StreetKidZZZ Рік тому +6

      Well shit, I do respect you for admitting it

    • @annsheridan12
      @annsheridan12 11 місяців тому

      @andreleitedasilva8708 yep! The women’s vote, feminism , and the Carousel have doomed modern women for marriage. Morgan Stanley, the New York bank advises that within a few years most marriage age women will be single and living alone. Incidentally, that’s death or any culture.

    • @pranayshome120
      @pranayshome120 4 місяці тому

      A grand salute to you, Ma'am, for demonstrating the courage to call out this crap. Love from India.

  • @Czarisyn
    @Czarisyn Рік тому +99

    The term "work husband/wife" really irks me. I had a co-worker that called me her "Work Husband" and she was my "Work Wife" and I shot that right down. I said "I'm already married, I don't need another wife."

    • @Leonnie13
      @Leonnie13 8 місяців тому +8

      Good for you. I hate the term. I find it highly inappropriate.

    • @DressedForDrowning
      @DressedForDrowning 8 місяців тому +3

      I absolutely agree! I also detest this term.

    • @Procopius464
      @Procopius464 8 місяців тому +4

      Gross dude. I've heard of that before but never seen it in person. That would freak me out if it ever happened to me. Seems like a prelude to adultery.

    • @youroldman8129
      @youroldman8129 6 місяців тому

      ​@@Procopius464Or an accusation if she's salty enough after you turn her down

    • @Procopius464
      @Procopius464 5 місяців тому

      @@youroldman8129 That's why Mike Pence would never let himself be alone with a woman who was not his wife. I don't like Mike Pence, but he was right about that.

  • @johnkendall6962
    @johnkendall6962 Рік тому +451

    As soon as your wife expresses an interest in an open marriage even as an abstract you might as well admit your marriage is over. There two ways to handle it. If you live in a no fault state tell her as soon as she says open marriage .WE are getting a divorce than walk out. If you live in an at fault state let her have her open marriage while you collect evidence of her cheating. A marriage license is a written contract. A written contract cannot be modified by a verbal agreement. Courts will not recognize an open relationship after the fact.

    • @nationalsocialism3504
      @nationalsocialism3504 Рік тому +30

      @Infallible Daystar getting evidence of her cheating in an At Fault state is brutal

    • @gregoryk.9815
      @gregoryk.9815 Рік тому +3

      It doesn't matter if they agree to open marriage. Unless they have rules against something. Like no co-workers and no friends. The condoms always if they don't use one that's a violation and any sexual actions are grounds for cheating.

    • @nationalsocialism3504
      @nationalsocialism3504 Рік тому

      @@gregoryk.9815 the Law doesn't recognize "open marriages" just like any kid born within a marriage is assumed to be the husband as Father regardless when DNA tests prove that to be false.

    • @johnkendall6962
      @johnkendall6962 Рік тому +28

      @@gregoryk.9815 Cheating is cheating. Even if the guy tells his wife ok in an at fault state he can still sue her for adultery and in some states he can sue the AP too. Ever hear of alienation of effection. Ask a lawyer if you don't believe me You cannot alter a written contract with a verbale agreement. All the guy needs to say is I never gave her any such permission. So what if he lied. As soon as his wife pushes for an open marriage he owes her no loyalty.

    • @patrioticaussiesams8581
      @patrioticaussiesams8581 Рік тому +5

      Then see a divorce lawyer IMMEDIATELY

  • @jasoncarter4343
    @jasoncarter4343 Рік тому +532

    Jeff has kept her as a FWB in order to punish her. First, to show her that she is not marriage material, and secondly, to break her heart when he permanently ditches her to start a family with another woman.

    • @jthreefingers8445
      @jthreefingers8445 Рік тому

      God I hope so. And hopefully in her next relationship she learns what not to do. But she sounds pretty stupid so, meh. Most likely she'll start a drinking problem, get sexed up, get knocked up by a one night stand and then cry about her ex and how she destroyed blah blah blah already feel sorry for that baby that's not Jeff's that's coming in like 18 months.

    • @ALUCARDAN2
      @ALUCARDAN2 Рік тому +69

      Seems like it if he hadn't he would have said something stupid like 'lets start anew and forget the past', nah he is telling her he will rail her but that's it.
      The danger comes if he forgets who she is.

    • @jthreefingers8445
      @jthreefingers8445 Рік тому +41

      @@JoshuaValentine yeah no. No I don't quite think so. I don't think Jeff will ever willingly go back into marriage.ost people who get burned really don't go back to the oven, fireplace, etc...

    • @danielstevens4198
      @danielstevens4198 Рік тому +21

      I love happy endings.

    • @cgt1373
      @cgt1373 Рік тому +4

      Amen

  • @animerican
    @animerican Рік тому +104

    How to turn a loyal husband into a cold heartless demon in 30 seconds!! SMH!

    • @pirjettabesil6669
      @pirjettabesil6669 3 місяці тому +1

      Not heartless demon more like heartbroken zombie

  • @chillinlee
    @chillinlee Рік тому +545

    The big reason why she can't get over Jeff is that he never begged or acted submissive. As soon as she disrespected Jeff, he emotionally disengaged from her and divorced. That's the most alpha move a betrayed husband can make. And now all she wants is Jeff. The Psychology of love is depressing sometimes.

    • @mgtow-balance3409
      @mgtow-balance3409 Рік тому +87

      the psychology of women is depressing sometimes. yep, that's more like it

    • @reygonzalez8706
      @reygonzalez8706 Рік тому +1

      Ha, ha, ha... She thinks that's great news. Ha, ha, ha... We all know what Jeff is doing right now. Poor dumb woman...

    • @roberthuettich5723
      @roberthuettich5723 Рік тому +8

      @@mgtow-balance3409
      😅❤

    • @jamesbrother9597
      @jamesbrother9597 Рік тому +16

      We pursue that which retreats

    • @tl-josh3058
      @tl-josh3058 Рік тому +6

      I think that she just knew she fucked up and wanted him back, I don’t think it’s THAT deep

  • @terrancejordan7484
    @terrancejordan7484 Рік тому +106

    She said that she would never baby trap Jeff, on top of being a 304, she's also a comedian.

    • @jeffsmith8197
      @jeffsmith8197 Рік тому +9

      Terrance...LOL! You know it! That's exactly what she'll do because she's obsessed.

  • @bojaiden5175
    @bojaiden5175 8 місяців тому +9

    Jeff got it right. He emotionally cut off from her the instant she raised the issue. That's how it's done.

  • @drl5002
    @drl5002 Рік тому +251

    If she had gone back to Jeff after researching emotional affair and said, "You're right, my communication with Byron is inappropriate and I am going to limit it to necessary work related topics only and if I can't manage that, I will change employers to be totally away from him. I'm sorry for hurting you and bringing up an open marriage. It was a stupid idea and I don't really want that. I'm going to work on our marriage.", she may have been able to save her marriage. Sadly she kept going despite all the red flags, the first being knowing how both sets of parents would view it if they had an open marriage, which tells me she already knew how Jeff would feel about it. It doesn't sound like he's some hipster that is into all the enlightened bs.

    • @borgerborgersen372
      @borgerborgersen372 Рік тому +44

      That's true, but for many men the marriage is over when they realize the wife even mentioned an open marriage. Then they know the wife is not completely satisfied with him and could cheat if he doesn't agree to an open marriage.
      I would never again feel comfortable in a marriage if my wife had explored the idea of an open marriage by asking me if I was open for it. If I had been in Jeff's position I would have told the OP that I will not be in an open marriage and would divorce instead. I would also have demanded the OP to completely cut all communications to Byron when she told she was attracted to him. If the OP had refused I would have told her then divorce is the only way.
      So maybe the OP could have saved the marriage with Jeff, but I got the feeling he gave up on her the minute he heard she was attracted to another man. He just wanted her to implicate herself so he had an easy way in the divorce process.

    • @sparkeykes8313
      @sparkeykes8313 Рік тому +16

      @@borgerborgersen372 I totally agree with your last point that as soon as she mentioned the open marriage, and he started doing research on it, he knew that he was going to get a divorce. So he gave her the greenlight to go ahead and figured she would implicate herself by hooking up with Byron.

    • @expatbiker6598
      @expatbiker6598 Рік тому +8

      @@borgerborgersen372
      Your comment is contradictory. Divorce if she mentions open marriage. 2nd paragraph you would ask her to cut ties with the other man.
      Contradicting paragraphs.

    • @borgerborgersen372
      @borgerborgersen372 Рік тому +16

      @@expatbiker6598 No it's not. I said that for many men just mentioning an open marriage will end in divorce. That means some could have accepted staying in the marriage if the wife didn't act upon her desire for the other man. However, Jeff didn't tell her immediately that he wanted a divorce. This leads to the question whether he would have accepted it on the premise she never slept with Byron.
      When I wrote maybe she could have saved the marriage I tried to put myself in her mind telling what she thought. Then I argue that she failed to see what he really thought and got her hopes up too high.
      I wrote that I doubted he actually wanted to save the marriage because his actions showed he wasn't OK with an open marriage even though he said to OP to go ahead with the open marriage.
      Having said that it's not certain the OP couldn't have saved her marriage if she immediately had distanced herself from Byron and apologized to Jeff for even thinking about an open marriage. Only Jeff could answer that. However, she ruined all her chances by actually sleeping with Byron. Obviously, she didn't know her husband as well as she thought.

    • @kwakithailand
      @kwakithailand Рік тому +3

      Good for Jeff that she wasn't doing what you concluded.

  • @LindaMeade
    @LindaMeade Рік тому +54

    Be loyal or stay single. It's not complicated.

  • @johnwalsh518
    @johnwalsh518 Рік тому +49

    You can't recover because your spouse has already decided he's finished with you and rightly so.

  • @LH-lv4zs
    @LH-lv4zs Рік тому +112

    1) Sex is emotional for women, no matter what they say. They enjoy the "chase"- flirting, attention- and give sex as a reward. Justine admitting the sex was great because of the "taboo" or forbidden element is correct. Her EMOTIONS (desire, guilt, lust, anxiety) were all over the place... intensifying the experience "emotionally, not physically.
    2) Jeff realized he doesn't need a relationship with Justine. He can "use" her for hook-ups and be much happier. She completely misjudged him, and thought he "needed" her.
    3) There are many, many OR stories just like this. The woman mistakes contentment for unhappiness and tries to fill her emotional void by having new sex partners. She never thinks he'll find another woman, so she gets to keep her faithful, stable man to go home to in order to not feel "empty" or "dirty" after her trysts. She becomes a "cum-dump" while her man eventually finds another woman that gives him better s-time and forms an emotional bond with him. Her man "pulls away" and favors his other woman while she gets angry and demands to close things up. By this time her man loses interest in her and wants the other woman. Relationship destroyed!!!

    • @mgtow-balance3409
      @mgtow-balance3409 Рік тому +13

      rinse. repeat.

    • @BW022
      @BW022 Рік тому +11

      Even if you played devil's advocate with #1, it's not good. Let's say you are a women and sex with lots of men has absolutely zero emotional value...
      1. How do you prove that having sex with Jeff has any emotional value?
      2. Even if Jeff is stupid and things you are the ONLY guy in the world which sex has value for, how can it have value if you are giving it away free to everyone else?
      3. Why doesn't Jeff just find someone who he knows sex have value? I.e. find someone who doesn't give it away.
      4. If sex doesn't have any emotional value, then it is just transactional. So, why should Jeff pay for it when other's don't? Why does he have to pay? Why not just sleep with you while you live with some other man?
      5. If sex doesn't have any emotional value, why does she have to have sex with other men? What benefit is it for her? Lust is an emotion.
      6. If it is just physical pleasure, then why can't you get that with Jeff? Is he turning you down? Or are you admitting you get more pleasure from other men? If raw pleasure is so important to you that you'll risk the relationship for it, why isn't it important enough for you to leave for a guy better in bed? It's so important you have to have it, but you won't leave a guy with a bigger d- later?
      7. Even if there were no emotion and zero chance of leaving him for someone else (impossible to ensure him that won't happen, but sure), the relationship could easily be destroyed by any number of other issues -- pregnancy, assault, a stalker, STDs, social pressures, work/firing, public humiliation, videos, infertility, etc. Why would Jeff risk marrying or having children with you?
      8. Wouldn't Jeff's life just be easier if he found someone who didn't want to sleep with other men, who did have an emotional connection to people they slept with and promised Jeff that?
      9. If other woman (even if as selfish and manipulative as you) want Jeff, wouldn't it be easier for them to steal him just by saying "I'd be faithful if you left OP."

    • @LH-lv4zs
      @LH-lv4zs Рік тому +6

      @@BW022 nor sure where you're going with all this. When a gal wants an OR, she really is looking for her guy's replacement. She doesn't expect him to find a gal, and to wait faithfully at home fir her to return from her trysts. She thinks he NEEDS her, and she's lost respect for him because of that.
      Jeff realized he didn't NEED Justine, and is better off without being in a relationship with her. He now can use her for hook ups without having to give a s#it about her. She misjudged him and now she's upset and hopeful they will get back together while he's on his grind without her... and just using her. Perfect ending!

    • @BW022
      @BW022 Рік тому +4

      @@LH-lv4zs I was pointing out how silly it was to say "sex isn't emotional" (and therefore you should accept an OR). Even if true, if your partner can have sex with other guys without emotion, then she can have sex with you without any emotions. Maybe she's looking for his replacement, although even if she wasn't, that would mean she'll still having sex with other guys (who give her nothing accept sex) while you are supposed to give her emotional support, a place to live, financial security, status, etc.

    • @LH-lv4zs
      @LH-lv4zs Рік тому +3

      @@BW022 I think you're misunderstanding my statement. Sex IS emotional for women, so when they say "It's just sex, no emotion, Baby", they''re full of it. It's always emotional for them. That's why when their guy finds a gal to do the deed with, since they're now in an OR, they feel threatened. They KNOW the other gal, their competitor, is feeling emotion toward their guy... and can, quite possibly, sreal him away from her. Which is almost always what ends up happening.

  • @Drain_Life_Archive
    @Drain_Life_Archive Рік тому +367

    Jeff played this game very well. He realized up front that once a woman pitches open marriage, there's a 99% the marriage is over. To find out for sure, he actually pitched it back to her to see if she would change her mind or go through with it. If she refused right there like she could have, that may have saved the marriage. But being selfish/stupid, she took the offer, knowing he was originally disgusted with it. He then clocked out and avoided her, probably exploring new women on the side. People like to set "rules" for these but they really don't matter because someone is going to ignore them and the relationship is most likely doomed anyway.
    At the end, she celebrates the fact that he is now using her for sex without any commitment what so ever. Stupid lady thinks he'll take her back or make babies with her. Never going to happen. Perhaps the worst part of this, like most of these stories, is that she went on and on about how great he and the marriage was, yet threw it all away for a booty call. No sympathy for women like this. New women thinking about open marriage need to learn from stories like this before they try it. 99% chance it'll fail horribly and she'll be left wishing she never even brought it up.

    • @eleethtahgra7182
      @eleethtahgra7182 Рік тому +11

      Well....the marriage sometime still exist....on paper. Still too many simps out there.
      Of course, the hubby would be suffering...

    • @dredohnosnibor3012
      @dredohnosnibor3012 Рік тому +11

      Doubt this is real because internet, but the morals are true ... Play stupid games, win stupid prizes

    • @solidmoon8266
      @solidmoon8266 Рік тому

      Hopefully he either wears his own condom and takes it with him, or get a vasectomy so she will never get knocked up.
      Wouldn't be surprised if she would try to sabotage any protection or take the condom to self inseminate in an attempt to forcible get pregnant.

    • @blazingpedals
      @blazingpedals Рік тому +13

      He gave her a test: let her go and see what happens. She flew away. Now she's just an FWB, a placeholder until he finds someone else.

    • @randy4609
      @randy4609 Рік тому +9

      This is what happen, unfortunately to even a re d p illed guy, even though Jeff has the re d pill, and he really knows how the female mind works, and he also has a fairly decent life, it cannot be guaranteed, if his wife will still betray him, even a handsome and rich man who understands women's nature, can't vouch for everything, in fact he did a smart test on his wife, and everything ended as he would predict, he does have a red p ill black belt on gender dynamics, but there is a mistake he made, that is, western culture affects his wife, where his wife must really be trained on how and the consequences that will occur if his wife fails to respect him, if I were him, I immediately cut all ties with my wife and left her as soon as the word Open Relationship was spoken

  • @MikeTheD
    @MikeTheD 9 місяців тому +3

    "My marriage was going great as usual but I kept thinking about Byron" is a mouthful and all you need to hear really

  • @kiddtaak
    @kiddtaak Рік тому +31

    This relationship stepped over the line. The moment this girl was going out of her way to be in the front every time he delivered something to the building/office she worked at

  • @DCD762
    @DCD762 Рік тому +40

    Anyone noticed that until she got her fun, she didn't ask to close the relationship?
    Only AFTER she got what she wanted 😂
    And as soon Jeff told her he had been on a date, she immediately got upset
    Women see open relationship as a free pass for them to cheat while their partners stay at home waiting for them
    As soon they realize that it means their partner can go out with another woman and give to that new woman what she considers rightfully hers ( women hate to share ), they immediately say " thats not what we agreed on " or " open the relationship didn't meat for you to go out too, just me " or " i want to close the relationship ".
    They always ( no exception ) forget their partners have the same exact rights that they do, and once they realize that, they immediately become upset

  • @rosihantu1
    @rosihantu1 Рік тому +112

    Here's how you handle limerence, stay away from the other person you are attracted to. In time those feelings fade.

    • @whitewolf6730
      @whitewolf6730 Рік тому +5

      Exactly! Joseph did flee from Potiphars wife.

    • @geoffn54
      @geoffn54 Рік тому +15

      Been there, done that Erick. You can't help feeling attracted to someone - like this woman was with Byron - but you have total control in how you react. This woman allowed events to get out of hand - like making sure she was around when he delivered - which just fed into the obsession. Not smart...

    • @jpduffy2003
      @jpduffy2003 Рік тому +7

      @@geoffn54 exactly. She was already cheating emotionally with the other guy. She went out her way to do it too. Can you imagine being married to something like that. Jeff did the only thing he could. She was going to cheat eventually. I don't believe her story anyway. She was already cheating I think.

    • @ShaunHensley
      @ShaunHensley Рік тому +1

      Men know this😂

  • @hanooi7450
    @hanooi7450 Рік тому +149

    Looks like Jeff demoted the ex-wife to a concubine or sidechick.

    • @deanfisher5017
      @deanfisher5017 Рік тому +34

      She's nothing more than a side-piece. For wrecking years of his life he needs to string her along and then Dump her at the point she thinks they are getting back together ! Hang in nair and find a nicer, younger, prettier , MORE DEDICATED one, Ol' Jeffy-boy ! GOOD LUCK !

    • @eleethtahgra7182
      @eleethtahgra7182 Рік тому

      Yup. Thats the only way she could get close to him. The only way she could pay.
      Heck, thats the only way any cheating wife could pay. She pay it with her body. She become his personal onahole

    • @simonjohansson7529
      @simonjohansson7529 Рік тому +25

      He dont want to pay full price for something other men get for free. Smart man, kudos

    • @donrood7282
      @donrood7282 Рік тому +14

      She belongs to the STREETS!

    • @jpduffy2003
      @jpduffy2003 Рік тому

      He demoted her to slut for fun. Just like the other guy had. Remember she said the face of disgust from her AP once he had screwed her...twice. He also told her what type of woman she was at heart, disgusting.

  • @kilamkam
    @kilamkam Рік тому +163

    I think my favorite in all of this, is Byron smashing her one more time.. Then immediately telling her it was trash and that he didnt understand women like her, with a look of disgust on his face.. That was him showing what he really felt about her as it was over between them anyway.. So she got to see she was actually worthless to her AP....

    • @HellstreamGames
      @HellstreamGames Рік тому +7

      Ehm, i think its more like he felt used

    • @eleethtahgra7182
      @eleethtahgra7182 Рік тому +5

      ​@@HellstreamGames yup. He thought she has feelings for her. Yet shes just using him to scratch the itch n dump him later on.

    • @tedmillion7171
      @tedmillion7171 Рік тому +10

      You say you love him, but apparently not. You say you felt guilty immediately, but apparently not either. If so, you would broken it off over the phone, not at his house.

    • @lelsewherelelsewhere9435
      @lelsewherelelsewhere9435 Рік тому +11

      The fact he asked for it again after she just said it would never happen again/was over shows it was a test. And when she agreed, he lost all respect for her, she became just something to use, equal to him.

    • @kilamkam
      @kilamkam Рік тому +1

      ​@@lelsewherelelsewhere9435You think he ever actually had respect for a married woman letting him hit.. He knew she was for the streets once she came to him with that open marriage bs lol....

  • @kaijumage5379
    @kaijumage5379 Рік тому +53

    Seriously, Jeff did everything short of waving a giant neon sign saying "TEST" while shouting at the top of his lungs "THIS IS A TEST!" and this woman couldn't take the hint. Now she's happy to just be an FWB, and maybe not the only one? She really is delusional.

    • @erachmah
      @erachmah 7 місяців тому

      Maybe he treats her better this way.

  • @im1who84u
    @im1who84u Рік тому +160

    3:55 When you are married and one partner brings up "open marriage", just agree with them and then as soon as possible go to see a divorce lawyer and start the process.

    • @givemeanameman1
      @givemeanameman1 Рік тому +11

      Well, a divorce is really just a fully open marriage ;)

    • @mordanthubris6516
      @mordanthubris6516 Рік тому +11

      @@givemeanameman1 I thought the same thing. "You want to make our marriage open? Oh yeah, don't worry, I'll open it riiiight up for you."

    • @darrylsmith3949
      @darrylsmith3949 Рік тому +2

      Prob be more strategic and ask her if she could wait a few days, then see a lawyer fast as possible because there could be legal implications for agreeing to it, implicitly or otherwise.

    • @im1who84u
      @im1who84u Рік тому

      @@darrylsmith3949 I like that strategy also. Both will get the same results.
      If you only verbally agree to it with no witnesses, well.

    • @davidpowers9178
      @davidpowers9178 Рік тому +2

      No never agree with it. Be non-committal and then go get a lawer maybe get some evidence she's cheating to help with your case.

  • @billthecrusher8283
    @billthecrusher8283 Рік тому +140

    100% if she even brings open marriage (poly) up, she has either already cheated or has 1 or more dudes lined up ready to go. End it immediately

    • @katwilliams2950
      @katwilliams2950 Рік тому +12

      I'd add, she is unsatisfied with some aspect of the relationship but doesn't tell you/want to admit it to herself.

    • @HeleneTorkos
      @HeleneTorkos Рік тому +2

      Byron I don't ever want to see you again. Hey how about a quickie, oh ok. I'll bet Jeff didn't cheat. If Jeff had said no to open marriage, she would have had an affair anyway

    • @nozirohhh
      @nozirohhh 8 місяців тому

      thats robably what he read to do on a forum to test her that way, kinda smart.@@HeleneTorkos

  • @tubthumper-ft9is
    @tubthumper-ft9is Рік тому +45

    Women will never understand that when they suggest an open relationship to a guy, he will never see her the same way ever again. One single sentence can absolutely end a relationship. She is basically telling the guy that her needs, wants and desires to be used for s#x by other men is more important to her than being in a committed loving relationship with only him. Once she opens pandoras box it can never be closed again.

    • @coureenlawrence4915
      @coureenlawrence4915 Рік тому +4

      I think it goes both ways. Well, for me, it is. That's just disrespectful to your partner.

    • @russellkeeling4387
      @russellkeeling4387 Рік тому

      Yep, words can not be unspoked.

    • @davidyoung2553
      @davidyoung2553 11 місяців тому

      I agree. You basically told your partner that everything they are doing and have been doing isn't enough and that can be crushing. They don't talk about the problems that leads to this thought process. They skip communication straight to trying to find the answer outside the marriage.

  • @georgesontag2192
    @georgesontag2192 Рік тому +37

    Divorve rate is 95 % if your wife asks for an open marriage. Remember she wants you to pay her bills while she has any man she wants.

  • @tonybaymont9134
    @tonybaymont9134 Рік тому +63

    Any time a woman asks for an open marriage, IT'S OVER. The mere fact that she would even "think" that was a good idea tells you where her mind truly is. Any man with his self-esteem, would at that point just quietly collect evidence and start divorce proceedings.

    • @eleethtahgra7182
      @eleethtahgra7182 Рік тому +9

      And vice versa.
      Man304 exist.

    • @tonybaymont9134
      @tonybaymont9134 Рік тому +7

      @@eleethtahgra7182 agree!!

    • @CatacombD
      @CatacombD Рік тому +4

      When the relationship isn't open from the start, there's basically only one way for it to be opened successfully, imo.
      The person who wants to open the marriage must first set up a sexual encounter for their spouse. For example: wife sets up a threesome for her husband before chasing other dudes, or husband sets up some cuckolding play for his wife, before seeking out other women. This proves that they are truly want an open relationship, because they are experiencing the negative side of an open relationship (jealousy) first, before forcing their spouse to deal with it.

    • @anthonywarren1317
      @anthonywarren1317 Рік тому +3

      ​@@eleethtahgra7182yeah! But men 304's have been called out for decades and decades so your point is what...👎

    • @eleethtahgra7182
      @eleethtahgra7182 Рік тому

      @@anthonywarren1317 thus, it apply for both.
      When a hubby/bf ask for open relationship, gf/wife should ditch him.
      Such story exist in other channels.

  • @LindaMeade
    @LindaMeade Рік тому +65

    The moment you tell someone in a committed relationship that you're attracted to them, you have done damage that you can never repair. Better to take that to your grave and keep your distance from them. Don't hurt the person who made vows with you. Put the energy into your marriage. What you nurture is what thrives.

    • @norbertschultz6233
      @norbertschultz6233 Рік тому +11

      Often your spouse will notice that you are attracted to someone. It is best to talk about it, we all have attraction to others, it is what we do about it is what matters!
      Like you say, work on your spouse and the attraction will go away!

  • @tempest83
    @tempest83 Рік тому +68

    Maybe I'm more intuitive than most people but, anyone could see that he was testing her. The fact that he basically told her that there was no guarantee of remaining together and she still went forward tell you a lot about her.

    • @davidyoung2553
      @davidyoung2553 11 місяців тому

      There was so many red flags there Im still shocked she didn't pick up on any off them. Me personally I watch actions more than what someone says and picked up on the first red flag right away when he brought up the open marriage idea after he made it clear he found it disgusting. Glad I've learned to watch actions rather than the bullshit that comes out of people's mouths. It has saved my ass on a few occasions

  • @kanteannightmare
    @kanteannightmare Рік тому +9

    She was uneasy about the stipulations but the thought of jumping the co-worker was so strong that she didn't just shut it down. The husband was right.

  • @sevenstepsurvival
    @sevenstepsurvival Рік тому +91

    Lol my favorite part was when she realized she couldn’t crocodile tear her way out of having gotten railed by chad 😅

    • @jamesdotson1080
      @jamesdotson1080 Рік тому

      Chad is over used. Byron was a Byron not a Chad. Chad would have banged her within a month or 2 tops.

    • @omnefarious1455
      @omnefarious1455 Рік тому +13

      Glad I'm not the only one who noticed that. The best part though, was after that when she tried to flip the script and gaslight him into believing the situation was his fault. Fortunately, he just walked away and left her to wallow.

    • @BlackMan614
      @BlackMan614 8 місяців тому

      pretty sure it was tyrone... but whatever.

  • @Mike.L.
    @Mike.L. Рік тому +96

    I think Jeff has decided to use her physically as a way of getting back at her, but he's playing a very dangerous game. Women can be very wily. Whether it's the "baby trap" she insists she would never do or simply using her tactile persuasiveness to lure him back in emotionally, Jeff is asking for trouble by having anything to do with her. I hope he wises up.

    • @eleethtahgra7182
      @eleethtahgra7182 Рік тому +10

      If hes smart, hed dangle the marriage option but look for other spouse.

    • @DS2951
      @DS2951 Рік тому +7

      I have a feeling from what she'd said about him in this story he'd far smarter than anyone knows.

    • @Drain_Life_Archive
      @Drain_Life_Archive Рік тому +8

      He probably got a vasectomy. By the time she figures it out, he'll have done used her dozens of times. When she gets angry, he'll simply say, "I was clear about my intention here. I said it was just sex. You never asked if I was snipped or not."

    • @beatpeitsi6853
      @beatpeitsi6853 Рік тому +6

      ​@@Drain_Life_Archive I was thinking about that as well. Jeff probably has said he wants to keep using condoms to prevent pregnancies and STDs, and Justine is thinking and hoping for an "accidental" pregnancy. She'll have to go behind his back and try to utilize the used condoms, whenever possible. That should keep her busy for awhile.

  • @TechnoMageB5
    @TechnoMageB5 Рік тому +33

    8:15 I call BS on this. You don't change the fundamental basis of a relationship, monogamy, without destroying that relationship. While it's _possible,_ just like winning the lottery is possible, I find it far more likely this was a made up story to promote an agenda. Reason: most "successful" open marriages are only good for a few months, then fall apart - and the stories of failures, just like this woman's story, are endless.

  • @louishagene3332
    @louishagene3332 Рік тому +67

    This is the best channel. It is a shame people are so easily influenced by society pushing destructive responses and behaviors to lust and limerence by opening the marriage to other sex partners. Extremely low successes rate for open relationships. Do you really want to play the open marriage lottery. I think that If the marriage is cherished as a sacred bond then other people cannot be an option.

    • @eleethtahgra7182
      @eleethtahgra7182 Рік тому

      Nah.
      Its not society.
      Shes looking for justification. And thus, she only look for success story and based her decission only on one story.
      Its like....u r looking for proof that trump/biden is good. Thus, u r only looking for article or argument that justify ur assumption, that trump/biden is good. U never look for argument or article that show that trump/biden is bad.
      She does not wish to...challenge her original opinion.
      For ur information....if u could prove that einstein is wrong....youd get nobel prize. But, till now, even with all our advance tech n tools, we have yet to disprove einstein
      Just sayin.

    • @eleethtahgra7182
      @eleethtahgra7182 Рік тому +2

      And even if, somehow, both spouse is okay with that, its the kid that would be fukked up.
      ua-cam.com/video/Ef1TlffYTAw/v-deo.html

  • @TechnoMageB5
    @TechnoMageB5 Рік тому +76

    34:45 This is amusing. She might as well take her house, bulldoze it to the ground, tear out the foundation, salt the earth, then ask what can she do to save her house? Same thing - there's nothing left.

    • @Drain_Life_Archive
      @Drain_Life_Archive Рік тому +7

      She could have saved it by refusing to do it when HE brought it back up. That was an obvious test she failed. After she pitched it, he thought it over and realized that if she wants to cheat, she'll cheat, one way or the other. So HE brought it back up to test her, giving her permission to cheat, and hoping she'd decline. When she took the bait and did it, he knew the marriage was at that point over, and it showed right away.

  • @darrylblackshear710
    @darrylblackshear710 Рік тому +23

    I don’t care how they try to word it. When you tell your spouse you want a open marriage, You just told them they are not enough for you, And you don’t love them like they love you!

    • @Remianen
      @Remianen Рік тому +1

      Sometimes I wish my gf would propose an open relationship. But she won't because she knows 4 of her 5 best friends would be in my bed within days (the 5th is married to my friend and I wouldn't do that to him). Heck, they've already told her, "If you screw this up, I'll be on him like stink on 💩". "Facts" "Get in line" "I live closer to him". 🤣

    • @Thor-Orion
      @Thor-Orion Рік тому +1

      @@Remianen I mean, it’s good that she has friends that tell her what a catch you are, but if you honestly wish she would let you sleep around you might want to dive into yourself to find if you really love her or if you’ve been content with the comfort of familiarity.

  • @Hulk-mc7bp
    @Hulk-mc7bp Рік тому +44

    The sad part of all this is that many women only feel lust or the need to be sexually active or make themselves attractive when they think they have competition or that they are not the man’s priority. Once they are sure about a man’s love, things don’t look good at all for the man. And the roles can be reversed too. 🤷🏼‍♂️

  • @jeredlyon9497
    @jeredlyon9497 Рік тому +154

    She hasn't been able to admit, the second she felt she had chemistry with her AP, that is when she decided she no longer had any love or respect for her husband. She not only crossed so many lines, she was also informed by her husband about the consequences if she followed trough. She was so eager to cheat and screw Byron, she never saw the trap set up by her husband. Meanwhile, with all the red flags her husband was waving in her face, she ends up screwing her AP again. What a hell of a way to show how much she loved her husband.

    • @benjamintan6750
      @benjamintan6750 Рік тому +23

      not exactly a trap , just him showing her the BOUNDARIES of the relationship and watched her RUN across it

    • @Remianen
      @Remianen Рік тому +10

      @@benjamintan6750 It was a trap, and she ran right into it like a rabbit to a snare. When she mentioned it, he thought it odd so he researched it. That told him that his marriage was probably over. Everything after that was him gathering information (who the AP is, how long it had been going on and to what degree, etc).

    • @Main07vega
      @Main07vega Рік тому +11

      Byron was also disgusted with her after the second act. she said so herself. Byron probably saw Jeff's plan the second she told him they had to break it off.

    • @jeredlyon9497
      @jeredlyon9497 Рік тому +11

      @@benjamintan6750 Just read over the title of her post, "I Forced Open My Marriage and Lost My Husband." If she really loved and respected her husband, she would have never forced (her own words) let alone bring it up, in the first place. In my book, when her husband announced to OP to consider their marriage "OPEN", what he meant was, their marriage was "OVER". He was waiting for her to do the act, to verify his resolve.

    • @eleethtahgra7182
      @eleethtahgra7182 Рік тому +4

      < the second she felt she had chemistry with her AP>
      Isnt it...kinda funny....
      Theres several romcom or mangas where a guy in relationship (his gf or wife) or even who like certain female, fell attraction to a passing beautiful lady or temptation from a close lady friend.
      The guy would then bash his head on tree or do something comical, saying something like "NO, the one I like is (insert FMC name)" or "you are a married man" or "you are going out with (insert FMC name)".
      I seldom see this trope in shojo genre.

  • @louishagene3332
    @louishagene3332 Рік тому +70

    It takes a little effort to keep a marriage sexually exciting but through education and imagination a monogamous relationship can go places most couples will never experience because they do not even believe it is possible.

    • @laurafedor1268
      @laurafedor1268 Рік тому +6

      Sex never WAS NEVER our problem..
      13 years 2gether and its hotter then ever!

    • @delmarhi
      @delmarhi Рік тому +5

      @@laurafedor1268 twenty years and mine and my wife’s is great. But I get what louis is saying. If you don’t watch out you can get in a rut. The key as always is communication. You want something? Say something. Want to try something new? Go in with an open mind.
      With that said, I’m off to dye our shibari ropes. Nothing like new fun 😃

    • @johnkendall6962
      @johnkendall6962 Рік тому

      True you have to be life partners not just lovers but partners in every way. I was married 8 years to my first wife and loved her beyond anything. Then I caught her cheating and kicked her out. The thing was my pair bond was so strong I had to get counseling to give myself permission to have sex with my second wife years later. It still felt wrong like I was cheating.

    • @aetank_yyteawu3436
      @aetank_yyteawu3436 Рік тому +3

      I encourage to sometimes change from intimacy, to straight up wild animalistic sex. There is a completely different dynamic. If feel as if sometimes partners get embarrassed or feel judged. So when they engage in affairs, they are more comfortable with this type of sex since there is no care for the other person’s judgment.

    • @ethosterros9430
      @ethosterros9430 Рік тому +1

      @@johnkendall6962 insane that theres women out there who would dare to betray someone loyal as you

  • @lornehampel1330
    @lornehampel1330 Рік тому +75

    Open Relationship
    Not a relationship per se. It is the stage of a relationship where the partners begin to audition new people for their next serious relationship.
    Often gets confused with marriage or other serious relationships.
    Synonyms: Monkey-branching, soft cheating

  • @goodzven4026
    @goodzven4026 Рік тому +30

    The fact the title of the article she read about open marriages was "Doesn't hurt to ask" is the most sarcastic thing ever because asking for an open relationship is almost the same as telling you allready cheated. And this hurts soooo much.
    These delusional women bloggers...

    • @mgtow-balance3409
      @mgtow-balance3409 Рік тому +5

      i said the same thing. you're asking for something that can totally shatter a marriage / family / extended families. ALL of those people involved and NO ONE would get hurt? the level of stupidity in that title is truly mind boggling

    • @torehaaland6921
      @torehaaland6921 Рік тому

      Probably written by a single " independent" woman which in a few years, still being single, ask " where are all the good men". These women are very stupid people.

  • @davet2459
    @davet2459 Рік тому +31

    Ahhhh, the kind of story that just puts a big grin on your face from beginning to end.

    • @Mbull4935
      @Mbull4935 Рік тому +5

      I love to listen to these stories because I enjoy listening to a shit show created by the person themselves. My fiancé thinks that I’m listening to them because I’m interested in an open marriage and tells me “you know I’ll never accept to one.” And I tell him “honey, you’ve got it all wrong! I don’t listen to this because I’m interested in open marriages. I love listening to people having to face the consequences of their own actions. It’s the epitome of ‘Fuck around and find out’ and it brings me great joy to see how selfish and disrespectful people ruin their lives out of pure selfishness and lack of respect towards their marriage/spouse. It also makes me appreciate the type of man you are and the values you uphold. I trust this will never happen to us because I value you, respect you, love you, and respect myself enough to not allow something so minuscule as sex to break up the friendship, relationship, and future marriage we will have.”

  • @larsopar
    @larsopar Рік тому +26

    "Divorcing me gave him his masculinity back. I disagree as he never lost his masculinity," That quote right there is how women just don't understand men. If the only two people know (the man and woman in this situation, but add on the third in an open relationship, the other guy) the guy lost his self confidence when his girl wanted to stray and I truly believe it hits different from a man cheating to a woman cheating, not to say AT ALL that it's somehow better if a man cheats, just hits us guys at primal level that I don't think women can understand, the same way we as men can't fully understand childbirth

  • @omnefarious1455
    @omnefarious1455 Рік тому +34

    I love how he confronted her initially. He must have been really hurt after he figured out what she was trying to manipulate him into doing. So, after getting getting his needs met, he called her out on her BS, hoping to make her sweat and suffer like she did to him.

  • @LH-lv4zs
    @LH-lv4zs Рік тому +101

    Another point: "Why didn't you just shut me down?" This is one of a few "go to" statements used by the woman to blame-shift her behavior onto her guy. Her desire is already evident, so it does no good to try to stop her. Once the relationship dissolves, she'll ask, "Why didn't you fight for us?". This is because her guy is now Red Pilled and acts like Chad. She wants him to care enough to fight for her, but he doesn't care anymore. It seems like Jeff became Red Pilled after investigating open relationships, and he now sees her on his terms, using her as a 304 and nothing more.

    • @mgtow-balance3409
      @mgtow-balance3409 Рік тому +18

      yeah that's why jeff's response was perfect. telling her that he couldn't control HER feelings put the ball back in her court. lol she ain't had shit to say after he hit her with that one

    • @LH-lv4zs
      @LH-lv4zs Рік тому +13

      @@mgtow-balance3409 I told my college girlfriend many times that I will NEVER fight for her. If she is unhappy with our relationship, she might as well leave because I'm not going to try to convince her to stay. She gave me anything in bed... and even was the one to suggest trying "anything".

    • @mgtow-balance3409
      @mgtow-balance3409 Рік тому +1

      @@LH-lv4zs nice!

    • @kilamkam
      @kilamkam Рік тому +10

      Seriously though// Imagine trying to "fight" for your own wife lmao.. Like wtf? Whos out here trying to prove themselves to their wives?....

    • @LH-lv4zs
      @LH-lv4zs Рік тому

      @@kilamkam, exactly, why bother? You never know the real reason WHY she wants this... other than to eventually possibly "monkey branch" to a different guy. Here's a link to another video where this gal doesn't give her FIANCE much because she feels ugly being naked with him, and is more comfortable with younger strangers. She wants a half-open relationship, but doesn't get it, and gets pissed when her fiancee finds another gal... who gives him better s-word time. Meanwhile, she gets probably ten-minute "activities" pleasing other guys or gets "ghosted". Her fiance is NOT the smartest guy, though. ua-cam.com/video/M325HwOKHUU/v-deo.html

  • @winniethepoohandeeyore2
    @winniethepoohandeeyore2 Рік тому +28

    END the marriage as soon as a spouse says they want an open relationship. He deserves what's coming to him for not leaving the garden tool in his dust

  • @Monkechnology
    @Monkechnology Рік тому +11

    Jeff turned her from a cheating wife to sideho until the biological clock stops ticking. That's some Machiavelli tier shit lmao

    • @youroldman8129
      @youroldman8129 6 місяців тому

      That'll work until she realizes what she allowed him to do; then she might go psycho on him

  • @julietaestamo8880
    @julietaestamo8880 Рік тому +23

    I hope Jeff invites OP to his wedding.

    • @scaredpaul540
      @scaredpaul540 Рік тому +4

      after this experience i dont think he will be married again

  • @R1Armadill0
    @R1Armadill0 8 місяців тому

    "You can't force someone to be faithful, they either are or they aren't." THIS is a statement that should be said out loud more often.

  • @redacted1093
    @redacted1093 Рік тому +10

    21:53 I disagree to an extent. Lust burns bright it burns hot then it burns out because it is not a concious flame but love is a small concious flame, it's a flame that can survive forever if one only remembers to guard it. Lust is something that carries you and as such foolish choices are often made while under it's thrall while love is something you must carry so every choice made is yours alone and will either preserve it or abandon it.

  • @geoffn54
    @geoffn54 Рік тому +15

    Great story FYA. The moment a wife brings up the possibility of an open relationship then effectively the marriage is over... even if the 'infidelity' doesn't actually take place. She's already admitted to a desire for someone else and a willingness for her husband to be with other women. That's not love. Love is exclusivity.

  • @erikbartlett2147
    @erikbartlett2147 Рік тому +5

    Once a person cheats, that relationship is over. Anything else is prolonging the inevitable. Period.

  • @backyards7513
    @backyards7513 Рік тому +15

    I went through a very similar event in the 1970's , at least now there is info like this to help. I was swimming blind, I remember when confronted with her "open marriage push" I said, such activity is the beginning of the end. It was..

  • @reenstierna6111
    @reenstierna6111 Рік тому +12

    Jeff's a smart cookie. He is spot on, he knew that when she brought it up and knew she would bring it up again, they always do. It was obviously on his mind and he knew before she did that his marriage is effed up and he will lose her so he's moved on because he knows he has no chance to save the marriage and she's blind to reality. And very strong possibility she will end up pregnant to another guy as most do, so he's just d3cided to push start the inevitable breakup and divorce.

  • @charlesjohnson4332
    @charlesjohnson4332 Рік тому +4

    The trust is over when a partner asks about an open marriage, and the marriage is over

  • @mattl6300
    @mattl6300 Рік тому +32

    He demoted her to FWB like a Chad should.

    • @mikef2811
      @mikef2811 27 днів тому

      That is how every man should deal when it comes to women...Ask yourself, "What would Chad do?" and then follow through with it.

  • @smegal13
    @smegal13 Рік тому +26

    I liked the video just because more people need to be aware. Set and keep boundaries in your relationships.

  • @michaelautrey6641
    @michaelautrey6641 Рік тому +3

    i always feel these women write these stories with the hopes that their betrayed spouse or boyfriend will read them and forgive them based on how complimentary they are towards the betrayed person.

  • @hessranch
    @hessranch Рік тому +1

    The fact that she went back for one more time tells you all you need to know about her. Selfish is as selfish does.

  • @redacted1093
    @redacted1093 Рік тому +20

    6:46 I tend to believe them when they say they were fully satisfied with their spouse because them greedily wanting more is no fault of their spouse. She was satisfied until new entered the picture but instead of realizing she had true at home she focused on the excitement of new.
    I've said before and I say again in terms of relationships the enemy of true isn't so often false but new and the enemy of good is more often better not bad.

  • @johnhollis921
    @johnhollis921 9 місяців тому +2

    I enjoy this channel and the insights of the narrator are interesting and spot-on

  • @im1who84u
    @im1who84u Рік тому +16

    "I Forced Open My Marriage and Lost My Husband."
    Gee, who would have thought that would happen?

  • @tsimpera
    @tsimpera Рік тому +8

    Hey man, the speech about love and lust really stayed with me. Great way of explaining it . thanks

  • @THE-michaelmyers
    @THE-michaelmyers Рік тому +31

    I was listening to this story and as I was I thought back to another situation where a female mistook kindness for weakness. She demanded an open marriage. Her husband simply asked who was he. She replied there is no other man right now. He started to get a few items together and as he was packing she was getting upset. He told her you have found a man, now you are telling me a lie. I am going to stay in my lake cabin for now. He gave her a month to leave his house. He hired a PI, then went to see the Attorney that drew up his prenup. He is now divorced. The only mistake he made was assuming it was only one man. Turns out it was three! Now to this story. The basic genesis of open relationship requests is toxic friends and co-workers. What most people do when they go online is seek out stories and articles that justify their position and ignore writings that don't. I took careful notice of how this was woven into this story. I also don't care for Jeff's passive-aggressive way of handling this situation. Tell her right off the bat the marriage/relationship is OVER and leave! There is no need in acting like a child. Now, I am going to disagree with FYA's take on the FWB position. I see no issues with it provided the man uses a condom THEY buy that never leaves their sight. Then they make sure to watch it be flushed. Now I am going to repeat my comment about toxic friends. I don't care if you are a male or female. Take careful note of their friends. Are all of their friends divorced? Do they go clubbing all the time? Watch those friends VERY carefully. Take notice of the relationship they have with their biological parents. Very VERY careful about getting involved with Chad's daughter!

    • @alihaydaryalnz6118
      @alihaydaryalnz6118 Рік тому +2

      You are absolutely right, we are idiots and animals without a brain and unable to think. ;) I immediately believe whoever tells me. I never think about what this brings me as a result, what a lump sum. This woman waited until her husband made it clear, maybe he was wrong. I think he's a very smart guy, Jeff. Make it clear that if there is an open marriage, he will not stay in this marriage. By not accepting the woman's rules.

    • @jimmyboy131
      @jimmyboy131 Рік тому +7

      Jeff wasn't acting like a child. He apparently was handling her the best way he could given how well he knows her and how she would probably react. Plus he needed to keep things as calm as possible domestically until he could get his own exit plan layed out. I probably would have handled it like he did.

    • @THE-michaelmyers
      @THE-michaelmyers Рік тому

      @@jimmyboy131 We don't know what happened Divorce wise. If it was typical most likely Jeff lost half of everything anyway. AND may be paying some spousal support. I'm going to tell you and whoever else is reading this something you need to understand. Judges don't take this garbage well. I know a guy that got into serious trouble with a Judge in Georgia because of this same kind of crap. Mental cruelty was added to the filings actually in the rebuttal filings of the wife because of the way he was after he caught her. On these comments and in Reddit is one thing. But when you are sitting in a courtroom or a Judge's Chambers and are being asked why you were being cruel is 100% different. If your wife asks for an open relationship you simply end it! One of you needs to pack and leave. My GF is a family law attorney in Virginia. She told me once about watching a Judge get so angry at a husband you could see the veins in his neck pop out basically over his childlike behavior. How many times does it take to get men to understand when you enter a Divorce court you already have one hand tied behind your back because your Chromosomes don't match! Now you want to take a chance peeving off a Judge that might have some sympathy for you the man with this BS?

    • @jimmyboy131
      @jimmyboy131 Рік тому

      @@THE-michaelmyers I totally understand but we don't know the particulars of their situation. True he statistically probably did lose his shirt, but in reality he was doomed to that fate the moment he got married, assuming she was going to cheat on him at some point.
      But as far as him handling it then he seems to have handled a terrible situation as well as he could.

    • @THE-michaelmyers
      @THE-michaelmyers Рік тому

      @@jimmyboy131 This is the thing. It is difficult to get other men to understand. In the national divorce courts, men generally don't fare well. The process is biased against men. It is even worse when it comes to children. Another point I failed to mention is Judges oftentimes overlook or ignore it when wives play games. But are ready to nail a man's rear to the rail if they do. Listen there is a part of me that wants to say GO JEFF go! Because from a personal perspective, I hate cheaters and wish all of them male and female would go out and check vehicle VIN numbers out on the highway. I will tell you something else. A good divorce Attorney will tell a man right off to check the games at the door. The best course of action for a man in this situation IF YOU CAN DO SO is to leave! Just leave!

  • @blazingpedals
    @blazingpedals Рік тому +11

    This is the story of a successful open marriage. It was successful in causing a divorce. Now she's in a different kind of open relationship, but this time without any committment by Jeff. I hope he got himself snipped because having a kid with her will tie them together FOR LIFE - there will always be family functions as long as the kid lives.

    • @Thor-Orion
      @Thor-Orion Рік тому +2

      That is the purpose of open relationships. Every single thing that society has done over the past 15 years has been geared towards destroying healthy relationships and the family.

  • @mr.anderson3288
    @mr.anderson3288 Рік тому +8

    Open relationships are pretty much always advantageous for the women only and is a way to say, I want you to keep providing me this lifestyle while I f other men on the side and safely explore better options.

  • @orenmontgomery8250
    @orenmontgomery8250 Рік тому +12

    Here's what you need to do to save your marriage...
    1) Unfrick the guy you fricked.
    OR
    2) Invent a time machine and go keep past you from fricking the guy you fricked.

  • @frankconley6321
    @frankconley6321 Рік тому +76

    I had a work wife. She nagged me just like my real wife......

    • @costalamb3065
      @costalamb3065 Рік тому +4

      Did you get a work divorce?

    • @frankconley6321
      @frankconley6321 Рік тому

      @@costalamb3065 why would she? She enjoyed the nagging. Imagine that.

    • @emillotyanu2350
      @emillotyanu2350 8 місяців тому

      Do you also get a "work mother-in-law"??!! No, thank you.😂😂😂😂

    • @frankconley6321
      @frankconley6321 8 місяців тому

      @@costalamb3065 Hell yes. Another job.

  • @im1who84u
    @im1who84u Рік тому +16

    The old societal model was:
    A young woman would trade her youth and fertility exclusively to only one man, and he in turn would be the workhorse and take care of her when she gets past her prime. This was a great incentive for men to work, become men, and get married. You got a prize, a young beautiful loyal wife.
    In theory, as we know life isn't perfect.
    She does him a favor early on by being a virgin/exclusive and later he does her a favor by staying and supporting her instead of leaving her for a younger woman. They both get a prize.
    The new societal model is:
    Women whore around and waste their youth and fertility on Chad/Tyrone, get walled out, get STDs, lose their ability to pair bond, rapidly accelerate their aging process with excessive alcohol and fast food, and have no loyalty to any man. What sensible man would pay top dollar for something 30 other men got for free? The incentive for men is gone. You don't get a prize anymore. You get a parasite with an entitlement mentality that’s looking to take your resources and then some. Before you even say “I do” at the altar, she’s already plotting how to financially grape your ace in family court after she locks you in with at least one kid, a mortgage, and then divorces your sorry ace a few years later.
    Why do you think she’s smiling as she’s walking down the aisle? Wouldn’t you if you got to keep the house, the kids, all the cash and prizes, and she’s paying for it all? Men get divorced to get rid of something. Women get divorced to get something.
    A woman’s main reason for getting married is to get a divorce. Most women are cold, cruel, predatory animals with no conscience.
    A woman who marries for money will complain about love. A woman who marries for love will complain about money. A woman who has both will find something else to complain about.
    Apparently the worst thing a woman can experience is being married to a man who loves her.
    A man's seexual drive is used to lure him into signing a one-sided lifetime contract with a parasitic woman with penalties for leaving. She gets to keep all the cash and prizes and can break the contract at any time, for any reason, lie under oath, and suffer no penalties. In fact, she is rewarded.
    There is no wisdom in signing a contract with someone who benefits from breaking it.
    A man is not going to invest in somebody that at best laughs at him or at worst hates him and blames him for everything.
    You're expected to pay a premium price for a used up, beaten up, tatted up, parasitic leach. Who is an ungrateful, self-consumed, easily offended, fat, ugly, aggressive biitch on wheels, with a masculine demeanor, and an entitlement mentality. A soulless woman from the bargain basement bins of some store in the hood with the morals of an alley cat. An in denial, freak of nature, pathologically delusional, self-esteem deficient, morally bankrupt, bottom dwelling, blood sucking, inhuman, creature of the night, spawned from the seed of Satan. A true boil on the buttocks of the world.
    When she dies, the last living reminder of helll will be gone from the face of the earth.
    She has kids from Chad/Tyrone or both, personal credit card debt, no assets, school debt for a worthless degree in liberal arts, Greek Mythology, Humanities, or gender studies. No cooking skills and no desire to learn any, no fiscal responsibility, an overly banged vagina, and a pet you’ll be expected to take care of as well.
    And you're supposed to be happy about this opportunity to lick up the scraps from the floor.
    The so-called good men she wants and can’t find are out there. They just don’t want her at the table because she has nothing to bring except financial and emotional pain. When women say, "Men are only after one thing". Meaning seex. My question to them is, do you have anything else to offer? Crickets is all I hear. Which means even they don't believe they have anything else to offer.
    In addition, she also has great expectations you’ll do everything for her, make her feel better, and provide an unrealistic unsustainable lifestyle she feels she deserves because she read about it some feminazi magazine article that hates men.
    All this while she cheats behind your back with the “bad boys” she’s always really wanted all along, while you’re at work paying all the bills to feed this little parasite.
    Women don’t “love men”, they love what men can do for them. Where are all the great works of art female artists have created, inspired by their love of men?
    Men are not afraid of commitment or marriage…. Men are afraid of getting divorce graped in “family court.” It’s just a bad deal all the way around for men and a crap shoot at best. There’s nothing in it for men except the chance to be financially ruined for the rest of your life.
    If you were thinking of going skydiving and knew that three out of four parachutes failed, and you had already watched your friends jump, some successfully, others not so. Would you be willing to take the chance that you're going to be the exception and get the one parachute out of the four that is going to work?......... I mean they all look so pretty and smell so good and feel so soft to the touch and they are offering you the thrill of a lifetime if you would just let one of them wrap itself around you and make that commitment to attach yourself to it and jump...... would you still take that chance?
    But… but…. Look how pretty the parachutes are, smell their lovely fragrance, touch and feel how soft they feel, they beckon you to try one of them on, please try me on and let me wrap myself tightly around you and see how good I feel to you, I’ll hold on tight and snug to you, I am not like the others, honest I am different, I’ll work.
    Well….. would you do it? Would you take that chance for the thrill of a lifetime?
    Yea, that sounds like a good deal if I were a moron, is this the line I stand in to lose half my sheet?
    Good luck with that.
    Men are waking up and realizing this system is defective and toxic. Women's seexual liberation, femiinism and the birth control pill, have ironically dis-empowered women. They are throwaway seexual objects now more than ever.
    "Femiinism did NOT free women from the chains they thought they had. It freed MEN from the chains they had no idea were there."
    ~ Arch Stanton ~

    • @davidphillips6803
      @davidphillips6803 Рік тому +7

      Thanks. A very good "real and philosophical" view on modern romance and marriage.

    • @luckmanyo
      @luckmanyo Рік тому +1

      What a philosopher

    • @im1who84u
      @im1who84u Рік тому +3

      @@luckmanyo The comment you are referring to, originally started out as small little separate comments that I would post here and there, and then one day I got the brilliant idea that I might be able to link them all together as one long comment and this is the result and it is still continually changing and evolving to keep up with current times.
      This whole comment is a cumulation of years of watching and listening to others and learning from their mistakes, reading, listening to seminars, and of course my own personal experiences in life. The places I’ve been, the things I’ve done, and the people I’ve met.
      I am older now and have had a good life. I was M.G.T.O.W. way back when I was in my late teens and early twenties. I just didn’t know it and there was no term like M.G.T.O.W. for it. By the way, the music of the sixties was great!
      I learned early on in life not to listen to or trust women. I saw other men that had gotten married, lived to regret it, and curse the day they ever got married, and little did they know, the fun for them was only just beginning.
      Soon they would be falsely accused of assaulting their wives, seexually assaulting their own children, and then slapped with a restraining order and now they could only see their children under state supervision.
      Try getting a job or a place to live with that on your record.
      Oh, but wait, there’s more, the fun doesn’t just stop there. It just keeps getting even better with each passing day. Next, they get financially raped in the corrupt, unethical, immoral, dishonest, crooked, and shady at best “family court system” by a vengeful, hateful, vindictive lying, parasitic, shrew of a woman that used to be their wife.
      The woman you marry, is not the same woman you divorce.
      So, these poor slobs are left alone to cry in their coffee, driving an old rust bucket of a car because that’s all they could afford, his ex-wife gets rewarded for her poor behavior and gets all the cash and prizes.
      She gets to keep the nice “new” S.U.V. she convinced him to buy while they were still “happily married”, all the time knowing full well she was going to soon divorce his sorry ace and keep it. He is living in some small one room apartment, while his ex-wife is living in the house he is still paying for, she got custody of the children, turned his own children against him, “coached” them to lie about him in court, while he pays child support and vaginamoney to this parasite, she installs her new “boyfriend” in his house….. and it only gets worse from there.
      Getting attached to women only leads to emotional pain and financial ruin. Of course, there are always exceptions to the rule…… but that still doesn’t change the rule. It’s the exception that proves the rule.
      There’s no wisdom in signing a contract with someone who benefits from breaking it.
      Now, look at this poor guy. What women is going to want to date or have anything to do with a man that is broke, looks like he’s been pulled backwards through a horse’s ass, and has a vindictive ex-wife coming at him like a heat seeking missile?
      I was blessed with a good position in life and didn’t have to work very hard to get girls/women. Women liked being around me and to be seen with me and the guys liked hanging around with me because it increased their chances of “getting laid”.
      I knew the women didn’t necessarily like “me”, they liked being seen with me, they liked the thought of other woman envying them for being seen with me, they liked the thought of having access to my resources, they liked the thought of marrying my lifestyle and hooking me to them for life with a kid. Who I was, was just coincidental to them. They wanted access to my resources.
      Many a woman has asked me to marry her and I don’t regret a one I turned down. I do regret the two I did marry, but I fortunately did not have any children with either of them, was only married three years to my first wife and one year to my second wife. Did not get financially ruined cause I saw my mistake early on and got out before we had children and bought a house together. Although they both lobbied very hard to have children, I was able to put them off. I purposely did not purchase a house or accumulated much property because after I signed on the “dotted marriage line” I noticed a slight change in their attitude and not for the better. I suspected things might be going south and I was right. Both marriages eventually ended in a divorce. I got a vasectomy at age forty and never married again.
      When I dated, I dated from a position of power and I didn’t have to take any sh!t from any women and I wasn’t afraid to tell them to hit the road and they knew I would do it. That threat has to absolutely be on the table at all times. I had a reputation for not taking any sh!t and had already demonstrated my willingness to retire beetchy women in past relationships.
      If they became beetchy, controlling, or in general just not fun to be around…… at that point, they had reached their expiration date, I didn’t need them, and their phone stopped ringing. What is the point of dating someone if she isn’t fun to be around? These things are supposed to make your life better. There was always another one waiting in line to take her place. It was that simple, no fights, no arguments…. It just went silent. It’s been nice, I am sorry but it’s just not working out. I hope you find someone else more deserving of you… (to take your sheet)
      I never told them they couldn’t do this, or they couldn’t do that, but if they weren’t bringing seex to the table, well then, why are you even here? I can get everything else I need from my friends and a dog.
      They were always free to do and say whatever they wanted to and they were always free to leave at any time. My only job was to decide if I was willing to keep them around and put up with their behavior. If I didn’t like something they were doing, I would put them on notice that if it continued, we would no longer be dating and in that case, they were free to see other men with my blessing. Sometimes I would even recommend other guys I thought they might be more compatible with.
      Even today as an older man, I can still turn heads when I walk into a room.
      The reason you might see this comment posted around is because I want as many men as possible to see it and to help those coming after me to avoid falling into these female traps and dream killers.
      I’ve never let any female stop me from pursuing my goals and dreams. If they don’t support my dreams and goals, they get left behind. In this world you either lead, follow, or get out of the way.
      As I have with others who have asked my permission to copy and paste this comment….. I extend the same to you. You have my permission and blessing to copy, paste, and spread the word.

    • @malificajones7674
      @malificajones7674 Рік тому +3

      @@im1who84u Yeah, you nailed every point.
      I got red-pilled at 18 after seeing my dad get reamed in a particularly nasty divorce.
      I made my girlfriend (she was 18 when we met, no previous bfs) wait ten years before I finally relented and married her, and that was only to provide stability for the kids. We've been married 14 years now, and it's been stable and drama free. But I spent a decade vetting her beforehand, so I did my due diligence.
      Despite that, I always know in the back of my mind, that she could arbitrarily decide to get a divorce for one of a million flaky reasons. If it happens, it happens, and then I get to enjoy being a bachelor again.

    • @im1who84u
      @im1who84u Рік тому

      @@malificajones7674 You're living the dream son.

  • @eugenewalter3170
    @eugenewalter3170 Рік тому +23

    Very few men would be red-pilled enough to be this much of a beast. This is how you do it. No emotional outburst, give her plenty of rope, and many opportunities for her to make good decisions. Her true nature won out. Jeff, here is your 👑, king!

    • @DS2951
      @DS2951 Рік тому +1

      Also notice the way he did things. He was set up to punish her from the day he asked who she had in mind for the open relationship. Probably had it through divorcing her and using her as a toy as well.

  • @poocumber7806
    @poocumber7806 Рік тому +4

    Great vid brother, perfect example of the benefits of knowing your worth

  • @bobasher731
    @bobasher731 Рік тому +5

    I love your channel and look forward to the next video. Your remarks about love and lust reminded me of what President Carter was quoted in his Playboy interview: "I've looked on a lot of women with lust. I've committed adultery in my heart many times." WOW!

  • @arrowgantonegreen839
    @arrowgantonegreen839 9 місяців тому +2

    33:08 - "If one partner brings up an open marriage, basically your marriage, your relationship if you're living with someone, or even just dating someone; that relationship is kaput, it's over." This is so true, as soon as I brought up an open relationship to my girlfriend, my wife left me.

  • @BooDamnHoo
    @BooDamnHoo Рік тому +9

    Here's a way to totally fix her marriage: travel back in time and DO NOT ask for an open marriage and stay faithful.

  • @voiceluckan
    @voiceluckan Рік тому +9

    Jeff is hella smart, he instantly knew the kind of BS she was on the moment she brought the topic up and he knew what he had to do, but since it was still just words he couldn't just walk away, so he egged her on to really prove her his point and get some actual solid evidence while he's at it so that he can justify his exit. Well done Jeff

  • @tedmillion7171
    @tedmillion7171 Рік тому +4

    An open marriage is no marriage.

  • @georgeturner301
    @georgeturner301 Рік тому +1

    Up till now, I NEVER truly understood this until YOU mentioned it - LUST IS STRONGER THAN LOVE.

  • @enzothebaker22
    @enzothebaker22 Рік тому +13

    Jeff now sees her as a an easy and guaranteed booty call. She's a known quantity. He'll never respect her again. He knows what she's thinking. They're both trying to play each other. Ridiculous.

  • @mjkingofmusic
    @mjkingofmusic Рік тому +2

    @2:42 "and often times can be inappropriate"...No sir, it IS in fact highly inappropriate!
    That is not acceptable when you're married. That's emotional cheating & half a step away from physical cheating.

  • @jeffsmith8197
    @jeffsmith8197 Рік тому +10

    I divorced my now ex-wife because she didn't respect me and I was in a sexless marriage. We tried marriage counselors and that was a waste of time and money. No kids or shared property, it was a easy out for me after wasting 3 1/2 years with a woman as cold as ice. Several years later I was told by a guy I knew from our social club and whom I knew had dated her before I came along, that he was banging her right from the start of the marriage. He did it as a confession, I guess, because he had developed Parkinson's Disease and found Jesus.
    I was either blind or stupid or both as I never had a clue and never even considered she was cheating on me. I jokingly call that my one-sided open marriage, where she was open and I was ignorant.

    • @findyouralpha
      @findyouralpha  Рік тому +4

      Your ex-wife and her AP are disgusting people. You are much better off without her and deserve better. Karma will always come back to bite you in some way at some point, and often the karma bite is much worse than what originally had been done. It looks like the AP is feeling that bite of karma now. Keep living your best life and stay strong. FYA

    • @jeffsmith8197
      @jeffsmith8197 Рік тому +1

      @@findyouralpha Thanks for your reply and for what you do, my friend. Yes, Karma is a b**ch and I truly believe in it. BTW, the ex-wife never remarried and lives alone to this day. My divorce was 35 years ago and she was 33 yo. That's a long time and she has another 20+ years to go being alone.

  • @benfogarty535
    @benfogarty535 Рік тому +4

    Love you're work bro. It's a really balanced RP take

  • @KimPossibleShockwave
    @KimPossibleShockwave Рік тому +7

    Yeah, Jeff knew it was over the moment she "casually" brought up the open marriage hook. He was biding his time.

  • @somnus1057
    @somnus1057 Рік тому +13

    I've always been in one-sided open relationships. I wish I knew during the relationships. I'd usually find out towards the end right before breaking it off. My current relationship is monogamous though. Just had a 9 year anniversary.

  • @WardenSpectreCommander
    @WardenSpectreCommander Рік тому +5

    Jeff checked out the instant Open Marriage came out her mouth. It was past the point of no return from then on.

  • @samuellane4437
    @samuellane4437 Рік тому +24

    Jeff isn't crazy, he's punishing her.

    • @ratoneJR
      @ratoneJR Рік тому +4

      Jeff is crazy. She could give him an STD. She is a 304, after all.

    • @mgtow-balance3409
      @mgtow-balance3409 Рік тому +4

      @@ratoneJR yeah and not to mention ANY legal pitfall in today's politically correct soyciety

    • @Drain_Life_Archive
      @Drain_Life_Archive Рік тому +1

      May as well use her body if it's still on the menu.

  • @HellstreamGames
    @HellstreamGames Рік тому +4

    She ignored every blog, article, reddit thread, advice about opening relationship=ending relationship. She found one in support of what she wanted and went with it... she said she researched, so she must have seen alot of warnings even before bringing it up

  • @thisdyingsoul76
    @thisdyingsoul76 8 місяців тому +1

    The only answer to a request to open your marriage is to hand them divorce papers.

  • @MacBailey
    @MacBailey Рік тому +6

    I think wanting an "open" marriage is like saying you want "dry" water. Just not the way it works.
    By the way great improvement in your sound quality from early vids.

  • @SulaimanAndika-qr8bb
    @SulaimanAndika-qr8bb Рік тому +1

    I really love you to perform the story. Not like others who do the same job like you.
    You present about the deep and gave the facts and condition right at the time. The brilliant is your translation the emotions of them in the story. Thats awesome, and every story come easier to understand.

  • @mr.c7312
    @mr.c7312 Рік тому +9

    She fucked up when she believed what she read in the blog. It gave her the confidence to move forward with getting with Byron. The husband knew she was acting differently long before she asked about the open marriage. Jeff doesn't want to be in a relationship with you.

  • @themorn2112
    @themorn2112 Рік тому +2

    This is one of my Favorite stories from you so far.

  • @bigdaddyjase9537
    @bigdaddyjase9537 Рік тому +7

    Love how she dismisses the masculinity issue…… she’s clearly does not really believe she’s at fault for this.

    • @Alastor999
      @Alastor999 Рік тому +4

      That "but whatever" really stuck out to me. It made me realized throughout her post and updates that she never ONCE considered HIS feelings or how her actions would impact HIM. It was always how SHE felt and what SHE wanted. If in the beginning she had stopped to think about how this would devastate her husband, maybe none of this would have happened. But she didn't. She went ahead because she wanted to satisfy her lust, never once considering how emasculating an affair/open marriage is to her husband.

    • @Thor-Orion
      @Thor-Orion Рік тому

      Well she’s obviously been infected with social misandry that views masculinity as evil so she doesn’t care about men’s feelings, because men’s feelings are “toxic” to them.

  • @dragineeztoo61
    @dragineeztoo61 Рік тому +2

    Jeff, dude - do not date your ex. Go no contact and stay that way. That would be better for you both.

  • @nachtwaya8721
    @nachtwaya8721 Рік тому +5

    As soon as he said he had thought about it, she should have reflected back on what he said about already cheated or had someone on the hook.

  • @STB-jh7od
    @STB-jh7od Рік тому +6

    IT ABSOLUTELY does HURT TO ASK!

  • @omnefarious1455
    @omnefarious1455 Рік тому +17

    She's getting exactly what she deserves: the EX-husband is likely stringing her along and getting his fill of obligation-free fun before then dumping her.
    The only reason she is being conciliatory and owning up to her actions now is because she knows no one is buying her BS (plus she doesn't want to lose what's left of her family's support, to say nothing of her delusional belief that she can win her ex back). How do I know? Because she tells on herself throughout the story.
    Despite all but laying a brick when her husband cornered her on why she brought up open marriages, she still immediately (and stupidly) took him up on his offer to open theirs. She then made plans to roll in the hay with her Chad within a day! He was testing her, and she failed spectacularly. She had her head so far up her own butt that she honestly thought she could get some on the side, and he would be waiting at home for her like a good little simp/ATM.
    Problem for her is that our man had found his inner alpha, decided he wasn't going to play her stupid games, and gave her the cold shoulder while he went out to get his needs met elsewhere. He was sending her a message ("I don't love, want, or need you anymore"), and after a few days, it finally sunk in just how badly she had messed-up. That’s when she started panicking and desperately tried to undo the damage she caused. Oh, but not by falling on her sword and taking responsibility and accountability. Oh no. Instead she tried the same crap that many wayward wives use to try “fix” their marriages (after they themselves destroyed it): Love bombing, manipulation, crocodile tears, and when all of that failed and she saw that he wasn’t taking the bait...out came the gaslighting and blame-shifting!
    She tried to twist things around and make herself out to be the victim, accusing him of trying to sabotage the marriage and throwing away their life together. And the cherry on top of this turd sundae: Her trying to make it his responsibility to ensure she stayed loyal to him and her marriage vows. Thankfully, our hero wasn’t having any of it and he noped out of there, leaving her with no choice but to hold the blame for her own selfish decisions. And even then, she still tried to dodge accountability and pull the wool over her family's eyes; like a child trying to hide the fact that she got sent to the principal’s office.
    Finally, she realized that she had backed herself into a corner with no way out and no one else who could take the fall for her. Then, AND ONLY THEN, did she feel compelled to confess what she had done and take reaponsibility for it. A 26 year old woman, acting like a 16 year old spoiled brat, and paying the price for it. Good job teaching her (and hopefully other women who were thinking of doing the same) a lesson, Jeff! Hope you got a vasectomy though lol

  • @yellowquantum4240
    @yellowquantum4240 Рік тому +1

    Super video. My relationship of 15 yrs with my soulmate partner , cheated sneaked around and got busted.
    I loved her unconditionally and she loved me too until she turned on me with lovers behind my back. I walked away and met a lady from Spain half her age and a Dr. Psychologist.
    My ex got bamboozled !!! I moved on and found new ❤. Life!!!

  • @Urbansilverback
    @Urbansilverback Рік тому +5

    Notice she created a mood for the husband. But the mood was set already with the delivery driver.

  • @Garanon5
    @Garanon5 9 місяців тому

    Funny how these cheaters always reference “successful” open marriages as their inspiration but ignore the many trainwrecked relationships that outnumber them.

  • @theyaden
    @theyaden Рік тому +6

    I think I heard the guys perspective of this story on the Strong successful male channel. The her hiding the end of the marriage from her family on a holiday sounded similar with the fallout where her family chewed her out for the whorish behavior following, him going cold because he no longer wanted to even talk to her, plus where he agreed to the open marriage and never took advantage of it to avoid being raked over the coals in the divorce.

  • @daviddrabick9018
    @daviddrabick9018 8 місяців тому +1

    A cheater cannot "save" something she has destroyed.