Narcissists Are Afraid of Aging And Dying. They Pretend to Change
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- Опубліковано 4 бер 2024
- In this video, Ross Rosenberg shares his insights about how and why Pathologically Narcissistic (Narcissistic, Borderline, and Antisocial Personality Disorders) people psychologically deteriorate as they age, and get closer to dying. The information was taken from Part 1 of Ross's recent "50 Shades of Pathological Narcissism" series, which can be found here: www.bit.do/Narcissism_Seminar
ABOUT ROSS ROSENBERG
Ross Rosenberg, M.Ed., LCPC, CADC is a psychotherapist, educator, expert witness, and celebrated author. He is also a global thought leader and clinical expert in codependency, trauma, pathological narcissism, narcissistic abuse, and addictions.
Ross's pioneering codependency contributions are responsible for the sweeping theoretical and practical updates and developing a treatment program that permanently resolves it. Ross has been featured on national TV and radio and is a regular radio and podcast guest.
In addition, he has traveled the world, giving his one-of-a-kind keynote presentations and educational workshops. His global impact is best illustrated by his UA-cam channel with 27 million views and 275,000 subscribers and the sale of 165,000 Human Magnet Syndrome books published in 12 languages. In 2013, Ross created The Self-Love Recovery Institute, a hub for his personal development, workshops, professional training, retreats, other programs, and services.
Learn more at www.SelfLoveRecovery.com.
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Twitter (@RossRosenberg1)
and now…TikTok! (@RossRosenberg1) - Розваги
They don't change so much as they change their tactics.
Exactly, and they cannot change because change is serious effort over a long time. Everyone who recovered from abuse knows how long it takes to til you no longer slide back into old habits. Except the abuser, who never make the effort to develop self-awareness in the first place, as they were so busy preventing everyone else to from trying.
I really struggle, with this shared ‘truth’ many speak of; we (outsiders/strangers) know their TRUE inner thoughts, intentions, character, etc BETTER than them; it is logical, valid, & KEY that we DISTRUST their words & even actions they may hint at positive change- we can all confidently ASSUME they are failures frauds in efforts to change, and that their label (as TOXIC to others) can’t and won’t ever change. Even if they want it, their efforts are dead before they launch. So, if they say they’re trying to change they are either lying or trying new manipulation or just don’t see how hopeless they ALL DEF are? Is this your intentional meaning? If so, why? Does clinical evidence tell us, once a narcissist always an asshole? Regardless of their own stated perspective? The stakes are sooo high, of this ‘certainty’ (cutting ties, dismissing people u cared about as hopelessly harmful, necessarily ditched). Is your criteria for passing these judgments, rigorous enough, for the immense impact of those judgments?
@@jenniferdmartinez7500 I gave my mother the benefit of the doubt, and she future-faked me out of a good job (in order to care for her) and basically let me pay for cleaning, repairing, maintaining her house, leaving my poor husband alone with our three kids. Then told me she no longer wanted to sell the house. She's 78. I'm 51. And she has future-faked her own grandkids out of their financial stability, all for the sake of control. Yeah. no. She and I are no-contact since my dad died. I was validated when I found my dad's will, in which he cut her out entirely. Still not worth it. I can always earn money. I don't have to spread my legs to get money the way my mother did. Malignant narcissists don't change. Doubt that at your own peril.
I had a father who was angry from childhood because his father disappeared at sea before he was born. As he got older he became violent. There was a divorce and my father turned that violence against me. I used to feel sorry for him for years. However, when I made a list of all the trauma and abuse that I experienced, I stopped feeling sorry for him. I was made to feel as if everything was my fault. This destroyed my health and my life. I haven't seen my father since 1986. There are several people in my family that are narcissistic and I don't speak to any of them.. They turned everyone against me. I was not protected.......... I don't care what happens to any them.
You are not alone. My story similar. Glad though that you went no contact. It's your life... I'm free too. 🎉
Same here!
They never change ! There main and only focus will always to get what they want !
Thank you for all this information sir!!! I appreciate all you have to share regarding narcissism and especially in old age!! My husband is 69 and he’s getting worse every day…I’m leaving him after 50 yrs of marriage! 😢
You can do it….you deserve happiness 🌼🌼🌼🩷🩷💯
This is exactly what happened when my diagnosed narcissist mother was dying. She was on life support. She refused to die. Then she got off life support and became more evil, mean and controlling by demanding we bring her fast food that her doctor said she couldn't eat, demanding we bring her the TV from her house to the hospital which is absolutely asburd. She woke up from her coma and instantly knew what time it was which was eerie. I was supposed to be at work during that time so she demanded I leave the hospital and go to work, being controlling. She was disrespectful and ungrateful that I was by her bedside when she was in a coma. She was very angry, loud and belligerent because she couldn't control the hospital, her coma, the doctors or me.
Its so sad ...
Sounds dark spiritually someone too act this way and know the time like that
@@LisaValentine1 interesting perspective. Thank you for sharing.
I feel you!
My mom demanded that I bring the microwave oven from home so the hospital staff and I could keep her coffee/ food warm. Then raged because I wouldn’t do her bidding, even after hospital staff told her it was forbidden.
You and Melody Beattie woke me up in 2012. At that time nobody had a clue what narcissism was. God bless you ❤
You're lucky that you woke up in 2012. I slowly woke up in 2020 at 35 years old. Wish I woke up the same time as you are.
@@rebellaire55 your still one of the lucky ones if you wake up at all. This disease is deadly. Two brothers and a nephew of my ex narcissist committed suicide. I was next. It was life or death for me. I hope that you are free and can now positively identify the disease to others. God bless you 🙏🙏🙏
You're lucky. Only found out last year at 36. Happy to be freeing myself
This title and the information in this video gave me a feeling of justice for my abusers. Great work, as always
I’m struggling so hard In my grieving. Last year I walked away from entire family due to both narcissistic parents. I moved away in hopes for a better life in a new city but found my way into another toxic environment. Im a 42 year old very intelligent black man who feels like a child starting in the world. I say I forgive them but I also harbor so much hate and anger towards them especially my mother. The biggest thing she stole from me is myself and it took me having a near death experience in 2020 of me to go to therapy which I can’t afford anymore to see the truth of my reality . I take full responsibility for my life and choices and now I’m left as being a 40 year old trying to survive heal grieve and grow without any support system or someone in my life. It I have hope
I hear you. I'm a 59 year old white lady, taking care of my Mom. If she doesn't get her way (she has the $), she threatens to kick me into the street, and I'm the one changing her & feeding her & wiping her butt!
I never could really build a life. I think you have to have ONE TRUE ADULT, TO SEE YOU, GUIDE YOU, AND SHOW YOU'RE LOVABLE. Trying to get something that your subconscious doesn't know is damn near impossible!
Your mind & behavior having good, balanced sense is making a difference in this world. Good luck to you.
I hope you find love & respect.
I hear you brother. Sometimes I feel like a child stuck in a 39yr old body. I'm young at heart but that's not what I'm referring to. You are not alone.
I got married when I was over 40 years old. Maybe you will meet a wonderful partner!
You are definitely not alone ❤ We're all out here too doing our best. Love 🎉
Me too my brother. Big cyber hug out to ya.
I’m 73 years old I live alone I like it better than living with my narcissist, husband and I never think about dying. I’m always doing something to keep myself occupied and try to always learn something new. Getting old has never bothered me it doesn’t bother me. I don’t worry about my appearance. I’m satisfied with the way. I look at my age I have gray hair Don’t dye it. I always excepted my age no matter what age I was. I didn’t worry about turning 30 40 50 60 or 70. I hate watching television and all these ads and all this advice. It’s like people get brainwashed so easily. And it seems no matter what type of life you live it’s never the right one. Most people a narcissist or flying monkeys and that’s what I have seen in my life. And there’s nowhere to run away from them and there’s no way to put up with them. You just Gotta stay away from them as much as you can. No matter what psychology no matter what therapy no matter what it’s never gonna change. So the best thing is to have boundaries and keep to yourself. Thanks.👍
Thank you for your statement. Would you say that today's fact that most people are either narcissists or flying monkeys was also true in the 1960s or 70s? I am 57 and have only very weak memories of these times, but i tend to believe that people were a bit better back then. But maybe it's an illusion?
nah I think it has ramped up alot, its not in your head, there are exceedingly more of them. it was much better in those years. pple were more polite and trustworthy.. just be extremely discerning 🙏🏻@@SandraUkleja-op6fw
I thought my narc mother had mellowed out in her old age. But when I told her I was recovering from a life-threatening illness, she said "Hmmm." She was disappointed. She was still evil.
I'm sorry that they suffered the harvest of the meanness that they sowed. The CPTSD is so clearly multigenerational. I escaped as soon as possible, and refused to pass the damage along. They got meaner and more demanding, the whole time I knew them.
I could not save them. I could only save myself. I recently learned that dad died in 2010, 14 years ago. And mom had died in 2007. I am so grateful that they are gone.
My healing has been lifelong, and I guess will continue.
I am 59 and am "learning to be... still" and still healing even 7 years after divorcing. I married my ex "trying to win the war of my childhood on a different battlefield". Upon divorcing, I realized that my ex husband was a polite blend of my mother and my father. Stay strong on your journey to realizing your strength once again.
This message was soooo timely, as my covert TS friend of four decades, is near the end of her road. So for the last six months, her narcissism can no longer be hidden. It is full blown. She can’t stand to be alone, or dying, and yet she prays to die. She doesn’t have a husband or children. Just a full blown overt narcissist, after being a covert narcissist her whole life. I have actually removed myself completely from this once “best friend”. She has become a vortex of “insatiable” need. I told my youngest daughter that if I become that self focused, at the end of my life, pull the plug! This narcissist friend is just as you described, angry, lonely, & depressed. She cries all the time. Yes she is a type of vampire who sucks the life, from her narcissistic supplies, and I was ONCE one of her key sources.
This message Mr. Rosenberg could not have been more perfect and timely. Thank you!
Are you taking into account that people with cancer, for instance, are often traumatised and living in a nightmare?
This has happened to me. As my mother has aged, she has forgotten all her lies, and can't keep them straight. As a result, I've learned all the manipulation she's perpetrated on me, my dad, my dad's relatives, isolating the both of us from anyone else except her narcissistic gaslighting. It's disgusting. As she's aging, she doesn't even bother to hide that she wants EVERYONE'S money. She forced my dying dad to call me multiple times to get me to sign my bank account to her. I refused. And she restricted calls to my dying dad. It's insane the delusion that aging narcissists live in. We are no-contact since my father died. I understand now that she wants to feed off me, and suck the life out of me, now that my dad is dead. That ain't happening. I have three kids who need me. She brags she has $2 million in assets. So she can USE it for her memory care. My kids are innocent of her malicious scheming over the decades they weren't even alive. I will not let them suffer my absence, because of her selfishness. She has surrounded herself with flying monkeys who all think they're gonna get a piece of her when she dies. Um.... it's all gonna be used up in long-term care, because narcissists live FOREVER.
@@i.ehrenfest349
My Turners Syndrome friend does not have cancer, or else I would have compassion. She has been a covert narcissist the whole 45 years I’ve known her, and I couldn’t see it. Most recently, once I stopped calling her for two weeks, (and listening to her sob and cry about everything from her computer to her toenails), I find out she’s released from hospice & the nursing home and is home! My TS friend is suddenly not dying after all! I also found out from her nephew, that I’m the only one she sobs & cries to. 🤔
@@mvbigmagic4048Continue to stand strong!
How awful! I’m so sorry! You mention the words “suck the life from me”. My niece called my TS friend “an emotional vampire”. They do suck the life from us. In their younger years, the covert narcissist is able to hide their narcissism a fair amount. But as they age, they don’t hide it anymore. You are wise how you’ve shielded your children from your Mom. Narcissists are extremely greedy about how their every dollar is spent,( except for “communal” narcissists who give money to be seen in the public’s eye).
This is exactly what happened to my grandmother. She completely decompensated and was desperate for supply. Do theu not understand the consequences that they will face due to their abuse? Do they not understand that their abuse eventually pushes everyone away and they will be alone?
They do understand. It's someone else's fault, though. It's amazing how the 'religious' ones never consider meeting their maker after all they've done.
They are actors / actresses, that act their entire life. They are the ones who are best suited for Oscar nominations as Hollywood actors / actresses…..,
Narcissists deny the spiritual realm. They believe only in what they can see, smell, taste, hear and touch. Based upon that they develop an ego identity , which is the person , the body and mind that will disappear someday
My ex does this. He throws money at them but doesn't have much to do with them. His "generosity" was used for self aggrandizement.
This couldn’t have come at a better time. I needed this explanation. My heart aches for this poor man locked inside his broken self. It really is a terrible ‘disease’ and I struggle with trying to figure out how to feel about him. I can’t hate him nor can I hurt him but thankfully we live apart (he left four years ago) He is 70 now and I see him becoming more and more isolated . . 40 years together, children and grandchildren yet he is such a malcontent and becoming increasingly worse. I feel too sad but I have escaped! Thank you for this podcast. I still struggle to get my head around all of this and to make sense of it. These people are so lost!
NPD is not really a disease, but more of a choice.
What do you feel sad about? Yes, it is a personality that he can not change, but anybody can manage symptoms, anybody can go and get help, etc. He made his own bed. Look up gabor mate. All that feeling sorry and overly identifying and empathizing can make you sick. I know I'm being harsh but I want more victims to save themselves. Wake up. He couldn't access empathy, but everything he did was a choice. This isn't autism or something else he can't control. He chose everything he did as an adult .
@@peachesandpoetsnonsense. No one would choose to be a narcissist. They live very sad lives, and so long as you’re not pulled into it, it’s ok to have some empathy and be compassionate.
This is helpful , my ex husband is emailing me after 4months separation, after many back and forth disagreement about him visiting my kids and my grandchildren, after I said you have lost your privileges as a step father and step grandfather. But he felt entitled because of 19yr relationship during our relationship which they do not know about behind closed doors were toxic and life draining. So God spoke to me and said in my spirit leave it to him. For the narcissist will be exposed through his power . I am now taking your video to watch and see what he thinks he can get out of my children and grandchildren. . Because my family are not like his family. We have respect and integrity and he doesn't. So I see what hes after . He doesn't get treated like a king around his family. But my family are blinded. I pray that he does not come near my children and grandchildren with sweet talks and fake love. Which is what I've endurred for many years. I pray for Gods protection over my children and grandchildren in the name of Jesus Christ 🙏
Current situation is that I won't put up with the behavior or the blaming or the drama, so there is an odd lack of complaining or communication at all. When I ask why he brings home (cheap drinks with corn syrup) which he has been so adamant in the past are not good for his boys, he says "I got them from work, I didn't buy them." there is this odd lack of common sense, and complete refusal to make decisions or answer questions directly. I don't trust him. He hasn't changed at all. He still sits and plays video games all evening and all weekend, has no ambition and just acts like he expect me to forgive and forget all the ranting rages and evil behavior of the past if he helps with the dishes.
They crumble ... anxiety struck my 80 year old mother in law. She cannot control us anymore and feels too powerless.
That exactly describes my father and my ex-husband's mother. They are covert malignant narcissists. Thanks Dr. Rosenberg ❤
Narcissists have children but they've damaged them and wrecked their lives. Her 'achievement' is grandchildren and living long enough to get a telegram from King Charles. It is painful watching her deteriorate, the nursing home keeps her alive even though she has zero quality of life.
Great work Ross! I love people who are reputable like you on Narcissism doing videos on the mystery of P Narcs at old age.. I think it is similar to old people who have dementia.
Got rid of those , thank you for your time Ross
Are not all narcissists pathological? Interesting video. Thank you. 🎉
It's a terrible thing. It's what we call evil. I can only hope that some day there is help for the narcissists . I see them as a tyoe of zombie . They aren't complete humans. And our society is evil enough that they are often prosperous. It does no good to hate them. It doesn't do any good to love them. This is all so sad and painful. I catch myself getting angry about it. Oh well.
show this video to young narcissists
I think they’re more dangerous as they implode...
Agreed😮
I am sure about that
Yes...my soon to be ex husband has become plain evil and physically aggressive...it's scary, so I'm out of here. 🙏
@@mariajessielocklear8246 good decision.
My experience of narcs is that when they’re old and dying they have an entourage of people fussing around them and tending to their every need.
My narc mum cut me out of her life for seven years then suddenly got in touch when she was old and frail. She’s being nice to me for the first time in my life. Your video helped me understand why.
My narcissistic father was evil until his last day. I guess it's because he didn't know he was dying (he wasn't sick). He was pure evil and he died alone.
Thank you for this information. My daughter-in-law is a serious narcissist. Her mother has NPD. She is 45 years old and is the mother of my 5 year old granddaughter and 6 year old autistic grandson. My biggest concern is for my beautiful, funny, smart granddaughter is blooming while she is withering. Not to mention how she is wearing down my Flying Monkey son. I know, letting go, is my only choice, but heart breaking my heart.
And the first one never even attended his OWN LOVELY MOMS funeral!! THAT says a LOT!! I have escaped 3 of em and will NEVER EVER EVER trust a man again, as friends, YES, of course!! But more thsn that, NEVER EVER EVER!!! XXX❤❤❤
Well explained.
I have experience this: my ex used to say he'll never die when he was in his 50's. Later when I talked about dying he said: I live at least 100 years old. 🤔😩
Is this feel because they have seen the destination after death 💀, when they have been possessed by the dark aspects of their subconscious!!! I wonder 💭?
They are very cunning and calculated.
Age is vulnerability, who says ''yeah I want to be vulnerable and I'm gonna love it''
Dying is frightening for everyone because we have no concrete evidence what it is! Who wouldn't be afraid?
Thank you very much. This is so true. I'm a Christian believer and did experience so much with and about JESUS over the decades. I know that HE is real and that there will be an afterlife. I have imaginations about it all which i believe are given to me by the Holy Spirit, whose annointing i feel daily very strongly.
BUT i cannot imagine death. How or what will it be?
The Bible says death is a person, our last enemy. This definition does nothing but scaring me.
@SandraUkleja-op6fw this may not go along with your beliefs so I apologize if it offends. They say God is the first particle of light, all powerful, whizzing around faster than the speed of light when the laws of physics were not introduced yet, this particle wizz3d around so fast it overtook itself🙀 creating the illusion of another particle, which created more n more and eventually creating ''us'' we are but an illusion this God particle created and gave us free will. When the illusionary body eventually dies it just goes back to the God particle to be one with the almighty. The ''self'' is mearly a mirage that was never real in the first place. Just as your dreams, if you have a bad dream they feel very real when you are in them until you wake up, then and only then you breath a sigh of relief it's over and just a bad dream. This goes on and on.
I’m not afraid to die the soul lives on forever. Many people have had NDE who confirm this. Honestly the people who have passed on are in a way better place than any of us living on Earth. We are the ones that have to deal with earthly problems not them. Their souls are free now.
I always worry if I have narcissistic tendencies but as I get older I’m not afraid of getting old or dying, so I hope that means I’m not a narcissistic.
my father is 74 and he is out of victim's my mum passed in 2022.
His 2 brothers also passed shortly after.
my father upped his drug abuse and he was a physically abused my mothe physically emotionally mentally financially.
he always abused me verbally narcissistic make sure i dont have healthy relationships with men.
now his out of my house as he excalcalsted to physical physical abuse he broke my nose in 4 places ..... he is in panic mode forsure he cut him out alone he wrote it in vourt documents he is depressed like that is my problem i was just a battery he took from me on all levels...... its like he wants my life.
So the narcissist is aware that their behavior is wrong?
This is why they donate their whole money for buildings with their name on.
Thankyou this was very helpful.
Glad it was helpful!
Not my narcissist. He’s the psychopathic kind. His perfect body and and superior mind means he’s impervious to sickness and dementia. His genes are long lived but I don’t think he will escape the effects of alcoholism. And it’s amusing because this creature cannot handle sickness. He shuts down completely and acts like the outside world (including people)needs to be punished for their pain
The one I divorced is a total nonbeliever so he’s not got any regard for decency
Just had to put the narcissistic MIL in a lock down alzheimer unit. She is where she belongs and we now have our life back. She has been unraveling since she had a stroke. She hid knives everywhere and was a hoarder. Yet everyone around her thinks she's wonderful. Just grateful she is where she belong.
Thank you, thank you, thank you!
Sounds like what is going to happen to my husband
Very good Ross,I see this happening before my very eyes,but still have empathy and compassion for my partner aged 62,myself being 68 and can testify to gods goodness,faithfulness to me, despite myself.
I don't know you but I thank you for doing UA-cam message it was very helpful to me it opened my eyes to a lot of that are with my family and co-workers and someone I was going out with in his forties how you said he realizes that he never got married had any and he starts self dis I see it it's going on right and your UA-cam video has helped me please keep making the to help thank you for your message Florence
spot on
does pathalogical loneliness ...
makes us think we were / are in love with them ?
😔🥀💔
More about it here: www.selfloverecovery.com/collections/human-magnet-syndrome-books
It's interesting to me I am an only child raised by my mother who was very self sufficient and taught me to be the same..emotionally secure for the most part. However I am alone at 69 now and feel my age..and not ready to die however who knows when that occurs. No belief in the myth of afterlife..although I have been surrounded by it my whole life. I just don't see the fact of that anthropological belief. We come to become and be in the experience of life until we are no longer in that experience. I've lived a life of appreciation of people places and things in my life..but learned that non-attachment to any body or thing beyond the actual interrelationship of which the Idea of a self as the other is recognized outside of ME. I can't force another to be mine just as I couldn't expect that to be the case before I appeared on the scene. I take it for what is worth according to the value that it is: good or bad. I cannot accept anything that I could claim is mine as death takes everything with what we ever thought said or did. What I brought to this life was nothing and that is what I will take back when I leave. What a trip life is...to experience something inside and outside of my existence. What good comes of it along the way remain to be see..if only for a moment..in ones' mind and when it's gone the eternal moment will always remain to be seen by those that are in the present. I wonder the existential crisis breeds the narcissist which is at the core of all beings. Which keeps us from seeing things the way they really are while thinking can actually compound the disconnection from the chance to experience the life one has in the hopes of changing what they can't see or understand. Which is the biggest fools folly.
Beautiful, very well said.
Thank you, and I fully concur.❤
@@lilith1971 appreciate you.
Jesus Christ is very real and He is coming very soon, things will get worse and worse. Repent and believe that Jesus was crucified for your sins, buried and rose again on the Third Day from the heart and Ask God for His Holy Spirit with faith which will lead you to all truth , much love!
Also, Narcissists were never showed any unconditional love
when theiy were little children.
Not true. Some were spoiled rotten, so their narcissism developed out of a grandiose sense of entitlement.
It's definitely true for some people.
Good
This video of PN is different than the others I watched, even more details I guess. Finding PN is not nearly possible because of their covert traits. But if you found one, they are a very good source of study as much as to studying any psychopaths. The main part is that they do not act directly as psychopaths or sociopaths; they use others as their prop to commit their brutal crimes; that is the challenge in identifying them in the society. They can get the job done flawlessly, twisting even the psychiatrist who would treat them. The details are perfect in many ways through my research in the last few years about Narcissists. PN or coverts are the most dangerous to deal with.
I got so tired of this fucked up world
Looking forward to the rest of Little Kyle’s speaking tour.
They don't t change because they do not want to nor do they believe that they have a problem that requires them to change.
Wow ❤
so question some that was a good friend changed DRASTICALLY after her father died and for the worse before he died she would actively talk about how she would break these rules he would set when she was younger and talk about how he would never see her as an adult... after he died she 180'ed hard talking about how she HAD to do all these things her dad wanted, had do everything the way he would have wanted.... could that be related to this kinda thing? she also seem to double down on this military wife fantasy and has now groomed a guy more then 1/2 her age to join so she can have this fantasy and as totally cut off all her past friend groups
Sincere question: why do you think it’s so unlikely this woman’s behavior changes are rooted in genuine reflection/desire to do better? Seems to me, she’s changed in ways that tangibly improve the lives of her forgiving fam. Why is that suspect, instead of celebrated? Why are your own theories about her inner motives & narrative, more ‘correct’ than the tangible ways she is SHOWING (not just talking) commendable change, at such a late stage…? So, did you convince her relatives to distrust her? To reject any valiant, final act pursuits to be better? Should she just rot in regret?
i would love your book hower im in South Africa Johannesburg
We also have the digital version that you can order here: www.selfloverecovery.com/collections/human-magnet-syndrome-books/products/the-human-magnet-syndrome-the-codependent-narcissist-trap-2018-digital
What does "SLD" stand for?
SLD stands for Self- Love Deficient. More about it here: www.selfloverecovery.com/collections/human-magnet-syndrome-books
Please, one question, Is the SLDD 11 step recovery process any different if the narcissist dies?
Join my program. More information here: www.selfloverecovery.com/pages/self-love-recovery-treatment
Asking them to change is like asking a man with one leg to grow another one, ain't gonna happen
Oh good
I got cut in half 17 years ago and I was on the couch for years for the surgery! The doctor told me I would be able to run ski I think he stretch the tooth a bit ! I have bones that are worn. What do you think?
My husband told me he sold his soul to the devil
That is very possible. I think narcissism has a spiritual component.
The dying process doesn't have to go that way for either the cluster B or the non-cluster B person. Some people simply do not have a legacy to leave behind, and some people do not even want to leave a legacy behind. Life doesn't have to be according to Maslow's pyramid, which is society related and based on popular belief. And with that comes the notion how people have integrity, how they die and how they should die within our society, according to a stratification that runs parallel to socio-economic status. etc. It is very narrow-minded.
A narcissist doesn't have to become more anxious than others. I know at least one person in my family who was kind of stoic when he came closer to death. He did not care, and maybe the rejection he felt toward others and toward the world made him feel that death might give him redemption.
He also did not identify with his posessions, but saw art as one of the very few things that still gave him a feeling of comfort. The man had been depressed for decades.
The guilt and shame were not things that weighed him down as 'judgment day' was approaching. There wasn't even such a notion of 'judgment'. Conscience on a relational level was there in the end, but more in the context of the wish of seeing his children one last time. And seeking peace after so many things that had happened during his life. Even a narcissist cannot keep the pathology up forever. Even for a narc comes a point when he has to admit that it is the end.
Edit: for so many people is the reality that they fear they will vanish into oblivion and that their existence will turn out to be meaningless to the rest of the world (song Eleanor Rigby). The truth is that we are not so important. Just look at our size compared to the earth compared to the sun compared to the universe. During our lifetime we have hope for a future and we make plans. We act like we live forever. Tomorrow is a promise to no-one but that doesn't count for me. And then someting happens. You become ill, and you know you probably won't live for another five years. You lose your house, your belongings, your future prospects, and then you will find yourself essentially grounded in a nursing home when you are not even 53 years old. Surrounded by people who don't care and just do their daily routines. You have no family of any meaning and no friends, not because you misbehaved but because they misbehaved, or just are not friends at all. People who all know better, but know nothing at all. Then the existential loneliness sets in, and you will have to find meaning in a broken world yourself.
There might be a thing to remember: why is it that people hang a torture device on the wall with a corpse on it? Maybe you have one yourself. And maybe it signifies that this is the fate of a person who is a drop-out - and because of that cannot rely on someone else without great risk.
Do you mean a crucifix on the wall?
😮What do u do when people flip the script Ross. I recognize the patterns just cant seem to break it . I never say ,"no" but sometimes id love to.Looking as I age ill recognize ill probably age alone......my mom use to say why give the milk away when u can get the cow for free....yes everything is starting to hurt. Trying to not be vain...just wamt better reltionships
( A lot my cues i try to take from my mom..but she was a martyr.
Come and join my program. More information here: www.selfloverecovery.com/pages/self-love-recovery-treatment
Does anybody know of any info out there about narcissism in family units? My husband's grandfather is a communal narcissist, it took me 10 years to figure out what the heck was happening. Now I've done a bunch of research and am seeing similar patterns in other in-laws. Am I going crazy, or... I don't know, does it spread? If it does, why?
There are the children of God (Our Eternal Father) and the children of caine, the wheat and the tares.
The children of caine are the ones that oppress the children of God. That is what this is all about. Families are a mixture of both.
I think it is awesome that you have recognized the patterns !
@@maryanne1537 I don't understand, Caine's line died in the flood. Can you point me at some scripture?
Yes 🎉they every where
Narcissism runs in families.
No I’m not
Why would my covert narcissist husband kill himself when he was afraid of being alone and afraid of getting dementia...?? He thought I was going to leave him and was tired of living...he killed himself...why would he do that?
Your dad confessed and changed a bit towards the end? I've heard these people don't change till their death bed.
SLD?
I broke free then ended up with another 2. They sadly passed away, and yes I WAS upset they didn't drserve THAT, one natural, the other fished out of river Clyde in Glasgow, he been missing a month!! And yes I was very very upset over both passings, all 3 were spoilt rotten by their Moms!! The 1st one still with us but I cut text contact with him, 😢 I forgive him but I will NEVER forget wht he done tl me, he even pissed on me, thrn laffed an said it was just a JOKE!!! YEAH, VERY funny!! Not!! Xxx❤❤❤😊😊😊je just a d**khead!! Havnt seenhkm in town for over a year, but I dont want him to die!! His daughters are LOVELY!! He was 17 yearsolder than me so he in his 70s now, I think part of hkm changed for better!! Lets hope so a yway, for bis families sake anyways, Xxx😢❤❤❤
Did he literally p*ss on you?
what's sld?
Its not a rare occurrence to get over a personality disorder. Most people who bpd who have therapy are in remission after about 6-10 years
A question if you read this please 🙏 is a person with dementia a person who was a narcissist? .. because I believe that in the Bible Jesus Christ healed a person who had mental issues and manisfestion of cruelty which is a narcissist (demonic spirit) if you understand the spirit realm. So these people who end up with dementia gets me thinking 🤔?
Sure not. Dementia is not monocausal, like most disease. there are so many factors. Diabetes, chronic stress, etc.. My mother suffered from dementia. She was kind and decent. She was never entitled nor did she clinge to life. When a lifesaving surgery was needed, she refused it. Though she suffered from dementia she seemed to be very clear at this moment. She just said : it is time to go.
If people researched why a Narcissist acts the way he does,
their would be no videos about
Narcissism.
Narcissists are little children in
grown-up bodies.
Little boys & girls that never got their way as children, so now as younge, they demand it.
I strongly believe in God!! Spiritually, Religious extremists are SO SO WRONG, it's ONE GOD!! Period!!!! 😊xxx
Narcissists who have a religion believe firmly that they will go to heaven, as far as I can see.
I like how you said about your father
"His version of the truth"
It's all relative isn't it?
Poignant video
Thankyou 🙏🕉️
What is an "SLD" as he refers to in this video, (recounting how the woman described who found herself alone 'on an island' as he describes it) and finds herself no longer with any SLDs in her life, whats the acronym here? unfamiliar with it. TY.
SLD stands for Self- Love Deficient. More about it here: www.selfloverecovery.com/collections/human-magnet-syndrome-books
most appreciate this clarification, link & description! :) @@RossRosenberg
Ross you are smart man knowledgeable and strong please do research about Islamic religion
Why?
The ideology is exactly that!! Deceptive!❤
Does this mean I'm taking someone out with me? Lol.. I hope this is appropriate.. its hard to tell sometimes according to how soceity says you could never do certain calling out people...
my mom in a nutshell
They are psychic vampires!! Drain u dry, 😢
no i cannot grieve for him he hurt me my mother my family left a huge mess....i have started a journey with God my father does not go to church or taught me about God he believe after he dies there is nothing.....
ironically a Jewish surgeon had to fix my nose that my father had broken .......
in my case the abuser victim passed away and i became the new victim.....
I always wonder why some people who claim to be christian or jewish or catholic etc but then say they aren't very religious.
It actually makes no sense. It actually is a person hedging their own bets in the after life. Its basically an atheist who is a coward. In other words these religions have belliefs that are in opposition of the other and have particular ways to get to heaven or the afterlife whatever you call it. But to say I am X but not ver X is saying yes I believe if I don't do what my religion says I will go to hell but I just refuse to deal with it because it will cramp the life I want to live and or I care more about what people will think about me. Its a position a person hasn't put any real thought into. I'm not trying to be disagreeable but to let someone get away with being religious but at the same time be off the religious hook by saying "I'm not very religious" is like saying I'm married just not real married. But this subject folks can talk themselves into anything because their need for public acceptance by those they deem important trumps even their own self respect of being a person of real integrity and saying yes I'm christian and do my best to be or yes I am jewish and do my best to be. Its a simple thing. I would stay away from the subject if my position was I'm X but I'm not REAL X, I think the meaning is extreme X but the real issues is fear of making a decision.
Having said all that about religion I like much of the content on Narcissism. Don't agree with all of it much of it good.
Jesus Christ is very real and He is coming very soon, things will get worse and worse. Repent and believe that Jesus was crucified for your sins, buried and rose again on the Third Day from the heart and Ask God for His Holy Spirit with faith which will lead you to all truth , much love!
Amen! The Pharisees were the narcs. The religious of the day. The lukewarm will persecute us!❤
Please understand that borderline personality disorder is different from narcissistic personality disorder. Kindly to not say that people with bpd are evil. Thank you.
Yes, they are different, but it's better to stay away from both.
That awful music at the end ruined this video
Oh sir, please give your life to Lord Jesus, so you can ask for forgiveness and make it to Heaven when you die. It is a very real place and I want you to be there. I am the black sheep and was blamed, shamed and pushed away. She still has her golden sons and my son and my grandbabies, who she turned against me. She is running them ragged at age 89. Im starting to wonder if she will ever pass on.
Thats the opposite about belief in God _ the only belief u need to go to Heaven _ is a belief in aJesus. Actually trying to buy your way into heaven _ is a tcket into hell _ so if u talk about God _ u better get it right. Wow dirty words coming out of your mouth_ u need a Jesus.
I imagine as their looks and physical strength fade they start to panic, given that they trade on them to attract a partner/carer/victim
Yep you confirmed it
Thanks
❤