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What makes narcs so dangerous is they are disguised as our mothers, father's, brothers, sisters, husband's, wives, children, neighbors, teachers, bosses, celebrities, coworkers, clergy and friends!!!!! To find out about the reality of the narc condition has been one of the most important truths of my life!!! How I enabled and why I was like that has been a big wakeup!!!! Thank you! 💛. I thank God for the good empathic people everyday!💜
When someone hits you, then you KNOW you are in an abusive relationship. But a narcissist destroys you without ever hitting you. You get devaluation, gas lighting, manipulation, "mind screwing", and then when you want to leave, you get love crumbs and empty promises. You can't see that you are trapped in an abusive relationship.
Thats exact. In indian culture marriage is deep penetrated whatever happens it is your life you are destined to live it ,to go through all the trauma esplly they ask whether he hit you. If the answer is no , it is simple for them to tell it is not a problem at all. They will ask the victim to adjust than the narcissist to change. With all this narcissistic trauma it is a hell coming out also.
Danish said a narcissist is the weakest person you'll ever come across in your life. That was my assessment of the narc I was involved with because of the obvious parasitic nature of the relationship. I was responsible for EVERYTHING yet somehow he wanted me to believe I needed them. I didn't know the massive narcissist injury he received at my hands when I constantly asked him to leave. Up to the point I legally evicted him. And gone complete gray rock with no contact. GOOD riddance!
I'm female. My ex would spike my beer with vodka. For ages I couldn't understand why I would get so drunk. People were commenting that I was so drunk on a night out. I said things to family that was weird because I was so drunk. I didn't know what was wrong and then one day he did it and a mutual friend saw him and alerted me. I told him and dumped him. It was criminal and still to this day I'm still upset about it. Worse thing. He used to scream and shout at me for being drunk when he was the one spiking my drink. They are very Sick
Oh yes, he tried his very best but I was too strong for him. When he would start trying to devalue me I would totally rip him apart. He could not beat me with his negative words I became reactive agressive. He was messing with the absolute wrong person. I am an empath but one that will only be pushed but so far. I am done with this extremely sick minded person. The final blow was him cheating on me for a year behind my back. I finally realized that he hated me and he made me hate him too. I am at peace now and moving forward. There is hope u can heal just be stronger than them don't ever forget who u are they cannot take that from u, not ever! Stand strong u survived!
The only way to ķill a narcissist without a gun don't ever engage , don't defend if you have to , don't justify, don't explain and don't persoloze ever!!!! remain cool , calm and collective !!!! Narcissist have ruined billions lives I know for sure people are committing suicide due to the abuse they have been through whether by their peers , colleagues, family members etc....I love and enjoy being alone I'm intact in love with my self until I find healthy individuals and highly educated folks then from I can be able to open up and interact with them .....please don't hurt anyone in this universe just protect yourself and other if you can !!!! I love people with all my heart I will do anything to help and protect them If I could !!!! Take care of yourself sweetheart!!! May our lord protect us from these malicious , vicious , wicked , dangerous and delusional people that existed in this universe !!!! Ameen !!!!
I'm at the bottom of the barrel,, trying to pull my way back up. From 17 to 57. Still in because of financial matters. But I stay prayed up and I'm thankful for these videos. I've been through it all. I've learned the patterns over the years. Watching the videos validate what I thought all along. Making me feel like I was crazy. I know better now. I watch your videos and prayer videos and stay focused on how to get out and be financially okay. Might be impossible,,but I keep God with me at all times. I pray that anyone who is involved with someone who displays that ungodly behavior,,,run and never look back.
I hate to say it but as long as you stay in the relationship you will never pull yourself back up, if you are with a true narcissist they will not allow it and they are smarter than you. Either accept living in that hell or make a decision in your head to leave COMPLETELY and never look back. Do not say anything to anyone except someone who is bound legally to confidentiality or maybe to one extremely trusted person who is there to help with your escape plan, but be very cautious because a narc has secretly influenced every person in your life….just trust me on this ! Do not write anything down, do not open a bank account, do not sign a lease…..nothing, because trust me they know and will have control over it….how, I don’t know but they will !!! A plan in your head and stashed cash is your only hope !!! If they find out your plan or suspect something you will pay, you will have further destruction, you will see or have no hope or resources or reliable people and then you will get thrown away as your final punishment ! It could be death, jail, homelessness…..but trust me, you will have no one left because your narc has been busy behind your back !!!!
@@rnupnorthbrrrsm6123 Thank you for taking time out for me. I believe you. Every word. I did all the wrong things. I've been confronting out of frustration. But only screaming truth. I understand about the chatter behind my back. I helped to destroy my image by way of drinking. I don't drink anymore though. Once I learned he was using that to his advantage.. I thank you so kindly for the godly warnings and even for the chat, because as you know, there's no one to talk to and people wouldn't even believe anyway. May god continue to bless you and yours
The frightening thing is when the real person emerges from behind the "false self". They are a completely different person than you thought you knew. It can't be anything short of a Demonic possession.
They live in a World where they do everything on "their" schedule and never show any respect or consideration for you if they make a promise ie Paying you what they owe you. Their thing is "So what if I pay you much later, I was too busy doing Happy Hour, buying a new outfit and if I made you wait, so what, you're lucky that I give you anything." It's like owing 500.00 on a Credit Card and they only pay $150.00 and they think the company should be happy getting anything of not nothing. They are very disturbed.
Don’t forget about the power of patronisation, a form of attack that’s difficult to explain to people outside the relationship who might see the Narc as supportive and caring rather than dominating and controlling. Believe me, being at the receiving end of daily ‘reminders’ to lock the back door and turn off the lights before going to bed is infuriating!
After forty years of marriage he walked out without warning leaving me without an identity and my world crumbled beneath my feet. It's hard to recover at 62 but I'm doing what I can. The hardest part now is the financial devastation.
@@TheSeekeroftruth1 please pray to God. At least your soul is free now after 40 years. Hope there is a law to punish them. Hope all our prayers will be heard one day.
If you are in the USA, apply for social security! You can get it at age 62. Don't wait to get more " at full retirement age", , that's just a govt con game.
They exist because they are not stopped. We are told that if the new supply contacts us to avoid getting involved. I’m not sure why exactly as people should be aware. Someone I know told me that it’s our responsibility to let someone know if a partner they are involved in has AIDS and I understand the reason because AIDS is a killer, well so is a narcissist. What’s the real difference when you’re going to be destroyed by both, just like cancer. The narcissist is, in my opinion, a destroyer of life just like any disease regardless if it’s from the inside out. As far as I’m concerned they should be identified just like rapist so we can avoid them. I have two narcissists in my life and I make every effort to limit myself around them as I’m fully aware of what they can do, and not just to me even though I’m looked upon as the bad guy which is very typical to their behavior. The big difference between me and them is I’m on this site to inform of my situation and be supportive for others who are struggling. I’m not using my energy to call out their names to expose them or create flying monkeys to take them down which is what they are doing to me. I hope that coercion control regardless of positive or negative becomes illegal in this country 👍👍👍👍👍👍👍
That 'smear' campaign can go both ways 😏😏 learning from the best after all; the difference is by exposing the narcissist one is merely telling the truth and then they themselves do the 'work' of living and proving they are EXACTLY what you presented them to be 😁 (that is in the case of third parties, friends, people who actually care to know 'what's happened to your relationship'). They might lie, pretend and try to manipulate, but their karma and real circumstances never do, it's there in plain sight 🙏🏻 they don't stand a chance when the TRUTH is spoken, that mask drops so quick!
you hit the nail on the head!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and the worst part is when family and friends do not see the dark cruel side of the narcissist.................all they see is to good side, and they label you as a lazy, crazy, selfcentered and stupid and whiney complainer...........
Had a special connection with a narcissist in a long distance. He will swept you of ur feet when he is trying to build a relationship with u. During the course of the relationship, u can feel that there is really something wrong with that person, sort of like a psychotic one. The best thing to do is to ignore whatever bad things they are saying to u, which i am very good at that (ignoring 😅) Bcoz, once u give-in and replied back - the convo will never end and he will always bring the same topic again and again. I dont think that a narcissist will ever change.. so if u notice a narcissistic type of behavior from a man - run and dont look back!
Yeah, i noticed in the first 2 interactions that something was off. 6th sense dont lie i guess. After 5 months i blocked everything. Im not an idiot to stick around... 1st weird behaviour i forgave, 2nd i distanced myself for 2 months and when i saw nothing changed, i got the fuck away. End of story.
My 13 years ex husband was a covert narcissist. When I left him, I left behind dispersed throughout 13 years of marriage: myself, myself esteem, my joy fullness , my health. I built him but he destroyed me. I built his finances. I left with few boxes filled with books, clothing and few cook ware and 4K to start all over again hundred miles away from him. I have not ONE good memory out of 13 years. He looked down at my friends when they visited me. The strange thing I had Zero trauma bound. Coming out of 13 years marriage, On the other hand, I dated an overt narc for 7 months. 5 months later I am still trying to break the trauma bonding. Still pushing back hard on the hoovering. Still crying. I remember only the good times. Go figure!
i tried for 40 years to bring peace into my marriage and sadly that never happened. i just figured we had a “ messed up relationship “ i never ever heard the term narcissistic behavior until a year ago. But now I know. In the best way to get past it? Zero contact. Any contact would just be playing into her Web. Hang on guys, stand tall . time is the healer 🙏🏼 and Prayer 🙏🏼
@@darshini4001 Amen, And God helped me reconnect with a Good Lady i have known since we were 5 years old. she knows me and i know her. i feel so Blessed to have her again. Thank you Lord 🙏🏼. ps , your shows have helped me so much 💕
Thank you so much for all your videos. What you say is so true. You don’t realize what is going on. It hit me when you said brushing your teeth was like moving a mountain…that’s exactly how it felt. I had gained so much weight, my health was failing, he wouldn’t let me sleep with his arguing at night and I felt like I was losing my memory and my mind. It wasn’t until I was scared I could actually have a heart attack and leave my girls with no mother that I decided to take care of myself. AND that was the beginning of my enlightenment bc he didn’t want me to get better but at that point I didn’t care what he said. Bless you and don’t stop what your doing bc it might help people get out of these relationships sooner.
Man, you are getting better and better, every next video is getting better and better. every sentence you say is worth in gold. Every sentence you say is imprtant ! 👍
I just came out of a narcissistic relationship. After months of back and forth, I painfully managed to do the discarding myself before my ex-fiance could do it. The first time I caught him messaging women behind my back, my therapist had me start reading up on narcissism. It was the best thing I ever did. I started to see between the lies. The reading up was hard. My mind has not functioned properly in 9 months. It started shutting down on me before I went to see her. My fiancé encouraged me to see a therapist. He said I needed help. After 20 minutes in the room with my therapist, she started explaining crazy making to me. I refused to believe her. I was angry with her, until I caught him that first time, offering other women money for nude photos. Then I started listening. The last time I caught him, I knew exactly what was happening. I beat him to the smear campaign. But my mind is not the same now. It doesn't feel like it will ever be the same. Memories of the abuse I suppressed are starting to surface. I am having terrible nightmares. I want my mind back. I don't even know who I am anymore. My family has had to sit and watch me deteriate. They are all praying for me. They see him for who he is.
Whenever I see any video on narcissists it made me puzzled and dragged me back into the memory lane which are associated with my deceased husband. Was he ?was he not ? As a sufferer and living with narcissist can't let u see clearly that u were giving ur precious moments to a person who doesn't care about u, no matter what u do!! Videos info make me feel like a fool that I remained unaware through out this process. And gives me goosebumps!!
This has been my experience and then some. Sociopath in my opinion. She came off as a young beautiful soccer mom. But if I am honest, there were red flags that I didn't heed and some that I wasn't aware of. I am well aware of what to look for now but, I don't think I'm willing to risk it again. The relationship was so toxic it damn near killed me.
Your videos are very clear Danish, and easy to understand how to recover from Narc abuse. Thank you, I am on my way out of a smear campaign and these really remind me to focus on me and carry on. Its better to get over a problem when you understand its origin. 😊😊 less confusion and more clarity.it does not change or stop the toxic person but your response is then healthy and controlled towards their flying monkeys. As well as them. It's not easy but with practice it gets better especially when you can't leave a job. No contact is the best solution.
You’re awesome Danish! 👍🏽 Listen to him people, he hits the nail on the head every time. If someone is insecure and doesn’t love themselves, how can they love you?! Or on the flip side if they love themselves too much there isn’t anything left over lol
The thing that is most dangerous is the fact there is NO LIMIT the depths of depravity they will go to in order to attain their goal or advance their motive/plot line. They will hurt you, manipulate you, destroy you without a care in the world - as long as it serves THEM. No matter how small or minor the ‘win’ is, they don’t care how much it costs YOU…even if that means your life or the wellbeing of your children. To them, a gain is a gain. I am not exaggerating. I do not mean this metaphorically or hypothetically. They can and they WILL run you straight into the ground. Love is not going to heal them. Prayer is not going to save them. At least, not before they destroy you (and everything you knew to be reality).
So true in every single word! NO LIMIT of the depth of their evil. Love? When they sense a trace of love they'd like a leach senses a trace of blood they'd suck you dry. Remember they're always looking for any chance to harm people (family members or not) without being convicted. And I am not exaggerating!
@S BT 💯💯💯 Oh, I know you’re right. Mine explained to me in great detail exactly how he wanted to (would?) physically harm me & not get in much trouble, if he got in trouble at all. Also, how he wanted to/would frame me for crimes, get our son taken away (and given to his mother who abandoned him as a child, of course!) Etc etc etc… The fact he even ***thinks*** like this scares me…as if I wasn’t scared of him enough already… All bad.
@@tiffanybluetarot No one could realize how real the demons are in this world until you meet one, especially that person is your family member or friend... At the beginning I thought a covert malignant narcissist is just a mean person, but as the time passes I've realized their evil trait is so deep... deep to the level that I believe demons are among us. We need to educate ourselves to avoid those with all cost as they act very well and often they go after people with high levels of empathy.
Omg this is all so true it took me five years of therapy and hard work to recover from a lifetime of narcissistic abuse . I was used abused and discarded my father, my brother, my husband, my youngest son . Now i worry about my grandkids. Ultimately to avoid constantly being sucked into the daily dramatics and hurts they cause each other . I Have been labeled as “crazy”. Ok ..and? I Have to look away and focus on what I can do in those world not what I can not change.
So happy you are still living ....I felt the same way these videos are so important but I also had to meet with a therapist and put on medication for depression and PTSD .... You are worth all good things take care of yourself 🙏
My dad always twists the truth just to win every argument. He even has sarcasm so waxed, that no matter how the story turns out, he's always right. Then he gloats at you in triumph.
Once again, you hit the nail on the head 🎯🎯🎯 I share all your information and videos to educate clients I work with who are victims of domestic violence and they all tell me they finally "get it" and that just one of your videos is worth more than 30 years of "therapy".
Not worth bruising your knuckles on, walk away, don't explain yourself, because they know, but can't admit that they're the problem, the more you explain what the problem is, the more they shift it to you. Give them some back, ghost them, move on....eventually they find someone else with weak boundaries.....
I can said sincerely thta by the Grace of God. After one year i was praying because i saw all this thing thta were happening and i couldn't understand but i thought it was me the problem all the time. One time i was so tired of it. I asked God if i should leave and he said yes, so i left thta day. I never came back thank God, once i was away i was able to see things better and after i started to see videos and see how all the this they said match with his conducts i couldn't believe it. I never thought i would be with someone like thta. We were married for only a year. Now i feel healed. I think it was the fact thta we were together not thta long and also, God is who can give thta power in the spirit to stay strong and keep going with u life. I feel very happy the way how i have been so strong to stay away from him. I do still think about him but i feel it is less and less, now, by the grace of God see thing better and i feel mostly free. i have faith thta God the same way he is got him out from the beginning. He would finish it. Only God has giving the strength and the power to overcome such a horrible experience. THANK U JESUS MY SAVIOR!!
So true. I was left with our six months daughter and my ex took off to advance his career in NY, lying about our future and saying he never really wanted children. He replaced me with a younger model and nine years of our fake love fell apart. God helped us and I went through hell.
(@ 3:35) - they do evoke fear in various ways in their victims, and I think, if you wonder whether you should be afraid of them during the ups and downs of the relationship,, later you will reluctantly perhaps, conclude, that they are fearsome creatures... :) true, you don't need to be afraid of them, but you can be concerned about the loss of time in your life, when you could have been being your happy calm self
When you take back whatever is left of your power and your belongings, and leave, they say that you are “killing” them. Can not figure that one out. You leave without support, empty and in pain. Your being had been surviving on life support by that time. Why do we feel like they actually need us?
It takes much fortitude, knowledge, personal integrity to not be a victim of a narc. These things are like your superpowers...a narc can't really get by them if you are strong enough.
My 1st husband narcissist awakened me on Christmas morning by pulling me out of bed by my hair, throwing me on the floor, kicking in the back, punching me in the ear and telling me if I did not wrap his family's presents he would kill me
"Do this, Do that" But if you listen, and have expertise, it is nonsense One I realized this, I stepped away The priority is to tell you what to do, to make themselves feel better The amazing thing I learned, is they haven't a clue even about the most elementary understanding of what they are talking about The result is to run you around in *silly* circles. I prefer not to be silly
Ronald McDonald I've noticed that highly narcissistic individuals seem to enjoy giving unsolicited advice and can see the funny side now when people, whose lives are in much worse states than mine, start criticising me and tell me what to do! I've even been told by a few of them that I need to see someone about my issues, which I've been doing on and off for many years anyway. I still tend to get angry with them at times though, hence why they seem to be avoiding me now. 😊
What really threw me off was, I was so focused on her first affair, and understanding affairs by paying attention to affair websites and how people can overcome affairs , I never considered my ex was a narcissist. Now EVERYTHING makes sense. We’re divorced. I’m in Pennsylvania, she’s in Montana with 10 cats in her parents basement at age 46
I’m 50 years old never had a speeding ticket in my life a perfect record !!!!!!!!!!! In one and a half months the cops came to my house four times and put me in handcuffs 😳I was about to have A panic attack in that car good thing one of the police men I knew and he knew me and he figured it out how was the evil one and innocent one
my own mother and siblings are predators!! omgosh!! no wonder i feel so devastation throughout my entire 50 years of life!! no wonder i want to die..thank you for validating my living hell
I have been there and come out totally healed and happy , you can do it too , you see what has happened , now go gently on yourself one day at a time , Death is a big fear for Narc families and they collectively project it on to their chosen target just to prove to them selves that they are the strong ones, please don't own what is no yours , build your physical health through rest and lots of quiet self care , sleep as much as you can ,Micheal Sealy meditations as I lay down at night brought me to gradual acceptance of my own strength and worth , Go for it , Love and very best wishes to you from the West of Ireland.
Please say more than stay away from Narcissists to stay safe. Please talk to those of us who have had their lives and sense of self ALREADY destroyed by Narcissists as to what we do about it to restore what was taken?
Leaving and staying away is literally the most important step you need to take. The next step is therapy and self healing...but all of that can quickly be undone by not staying away..that's why he (and many other narcissist specialists) stress this so much
You know, I offended wondered why they wanted me around because I am physically disabled and need help , I'm so different from them .the fact that it was more than 20 years ago I could not just reach out ,that made a big difference in the beginning . Now I can reach out to the help I need Had to set alot of boundaries and not cave on them I have been really blessed with my friends who have been helping out and giving me courage Man I am still working on hard on my life
I have a Narcissist mother and sister they both co operate and hides each others mistakes my raising their voices ( bilkul ghabrahat wali ) their tone at that time is too much dramatic, they easily put each others mistakes under the carpet , but tried to pin point and make a fuss of mine, and shows that how much work have been extended because of my mistakes and How much they are suffering because of my mistakes , they always seem resent full , holding on to some kind of grudge , many times randomly, which makes me confuse , I am always feeling heavy ups and downs of crushing feelings which makes me overwhelmed, consumed and occupied to the point I feel buzzing sensation , hot and cold breese on my chest , struggle to be my true self , I struggle to make a safe surrounding around me and the total in an out vibe that can remove darkness they have penetrated inside me , plus the bread crumbs of love bombing keeps you stuck , I figured it out much later , they are great liars they convey deceptively honest looking expressions. The look is predatory even in recent you haven't done anything displeasing to them , you can sense the danger of them even if you are not looking at them the Eerie and creepy feeling, they would tries to avoid you when you share your happy news and will accuse you harshly or feel very bad which shows on their over all body language that they are hurt (innocently ), they drag you in that zone , they try their best to show pity and shaming you what you are doing as a reflex action
Imagine the scariest monster you can ever imagine, and that monster is a Narcissist. My XN still has me messed up 5 months later. I try to push it down and not cry but this damage he did is so deep, that I don't feel human anymore 💔 😔 😢
It can take a long time ( years) to heal...Be kind to yourself. Mental and emotional wounds are more difficult to recover from than physical injuries. Eating well, bathing, loving plants or an animal (or both,) something creative...These skills can help in returning to yourself. Never believe that a narcissist can change...And find out, if you will, what it is within yourself that attracts them. Because otherwise they'll keep finding you. I've wasted my whole life not knowing what these creatures are and trying to love one after the other. I finally finally found out what I was dealing with. The last one tried to annihilate me, which is what they do. I had to do a lot of chord cutting spiritual exercises and psychic protection work to get him out of my space. That is really important because they'll keep syphoning your energy. Get rid of of any mementos, gifts, pictures, letters, everything.
They put you in victim mode - GET OUT OF IT ! You must not stay in this bad place - cry all you like and get the hurts out then decide to cry no more and move on.Surely all the signs were there - why did you get involved with this person ? Learn from all this and move on wiser and stronger.
@@eagleeye2300 I'm in NC (no contact) and I don't care to see him ever again. Or talk to him for that matter. My first holidays without him. It's hard. I cry alot because the damage hits the surface and I'm dealing with it. Have a counselor yes, and I listen to Danish daily on all platforms and he answers many questions I'll never get answers to. I don't know why I attract them. My past is not one I discuss openly. Except I think I attracted this narc because I just got out of a physical abusive relationship of 10 years and thought 2 years off was good then... met him... and thought it was all ok. I can look back at texts and see the lies in the beginning. But I didn't know. I'm doing things for me. Soon I'm getting a haircut. Ok sounds silly but 15 years of no one touching my hair and now I'm doing this change, to me is huge. I lost so much weight after him. Breakup diet... gained a little back but I'm being good to myself. Last night I wanted cheesecake. Usually I'd be belittled by my xn and last night I said I can go get some so I did. Was a happy camper. So I'm trying. These things all seem small to those who have never been through this abuse, to me every little thing I'm doing is a milestone. Tears and all. Hugs
@@feeltheforce10 You either have never been involved with a narc or experienced the abuse. No the signs weren't there. No I didn't choose to seek out a narc. We don't. They're so good at masks, mirroring, hiding secrets, degrading you, to every mental emotional game there is.. There's so much depth to this. Victim mode yeah they do, do this. I'm not choosing to stay here or there or wherever. I'm trying to heal.
@@yakityakteriw6774 Yes i have horrendous experience with a Narc - sadly a family member that i had to cut ties with 100% and life is great now so i have plenty of knowledge how they operate etc etc.Signs are always there - you said about the masks degrading you etc etc - they are all signs. You are wiser now so i hope you get out of the victim mode quickly and heal from it all.EFT tapping is great to release all the emotions and hurts you hold - look it up on here EFT TAPPING - its easy to do and gets rid of all the junk you dont need to carry around anymore.
The most shocking revaluation was finding out he was a thief. It's devastating enough to be discarded, for no reason. Well there was a reason. He got what he wanted, he stole from me. Once he got what he came for then came the discard and he then he disappeared without a good bye. I supposed the disappearance was a test, he expected me to come to him and talk him back into the relationship. But that's not what happened. When he just left, I did nothing. I did not attempt contact him. I went grey rock. I waited 3 days and then I dropped off a Dear John letter, letting him know I'd never be back and i was nice, but I made it clear he would never be allowed back into my life. . I told him we'd never be friends. It was about a month later I realized he had stolen from me. So if I reasoned with him and got him to come back, I know it would have been the green light for him to have stolen even more. Yes, narc are dangerous. A zombie would be a step up from a narc.
I did almost reach out to my sister earlier....but somtn was like....PLEASE DON'T DO IT!! NO! NO! NO! There is no love there.. keep moving onnnn! And I was obedient.
I thought I was a narcissistic person. I was the one with the power in the relationship. I see now what it is. It messed me up big time. I now understand.
I'm a vedic priest..one got on my property..he threatened to kill me..stole my house, money,slandered me..left me to die..just destroyed 6th car..haven't shopped in 4 years...pretended to be a devotee...worst thing I've ever had.. still here...destroyed my camp 2 nights ago...I'll never get over it..he molests his daughter..I called cops...now he's trying to kill me.
it is the most destructive experience i have ever had :( he left me wounded and fraid of everything!! even afraid to go to any social place where i can find him!!
Unpredictability. You never know who you are waking up next to. Today could be a great one, or it could be a crying and screaming tantrum all directed at you for absolutely no reason. To say that would make you anxious is an understatement. They use that fear to control you and make you dance to their tune so they can feel powerful.
Imagine that the source of this pain are both parents. Only other member of family, or some friends that analyze the situation, can help you heal, and gain some understanding of reality.
Everyday there is this futile exchange of words. I often feel don’t speak don’t hurt. He turns almost everything I say into some other format that I feel like there is no way to communicate. Example: we golfed today. At the end of golf he asked if I wanted to get something to eat, I said no we have chicken at home and I can make you whatever you would like. He is pouting now he had a chili hotdog less than two hours ago. So we get home and again I offer to make him something to eat. He says I don’t want anything right now. Not 10 minutes go by and he is microwaving a portion of chicken and I’m like go for it, I did not say a word and decided to just let it go because everything is so senseless. But he also was mad about his golfing. I suggested he take another club with him and of coarse he refused, then when he needed the club he refused to take he needed it in the end. He projected it on me like it was my fault. I said well sometimes it better to take three clubs to be prepared for the end shots. He again “ oh like you do that all the time” I never see you take three clubs. I said I do if I’m not sure about the shot I need to make. Well I never see you do that!!! So since wee are home from golf I have chosen not to engage in any form of dialogue with him. It’s the safe place because I can’t. There is a never knowing what I ask say or interject it’s always scrutinized to fit what he thinks and believes, right or wrong? So I bail and let him do and be whatever. Yes do I feel betrayed and in a constant array of what to do and how to get away so I don’t say something that he slings shit at me with? YES no end to it. He says I ask him questions no matter what he does or says. It was over turning on the light above the kitchen table. The light was coming through the window and he was putting on his golf shoes and I did ask why the light? Then it was on from there. After my chastising of how “no matter what he does I have to constantly question him down to wiping the table off after breakfast I’m the reason for even asking, he has no rights!!! So I’m in silent mode don’t care don’t want don’t need pretty much sums it up. See how petty and childish this is? No room for error ever. His way or NO way!!!
I agree that narcissists are dangerous. However I disagree that all those who have been victimized by a narcissist will be forever diminished by the trauma suffered. Because none of us believers in the Lord are ever going to be altogether alone.
@Amanda on the Internet I was in a women's shelter telling a social worker once the same thing. She disagreed with me while I was saying to her that I will never be the happy, healthy, sweet and innocent person that I was before the narcissist diminished me. She responded by saying good that you are not the same person as you were while getting duped into marriage to a narcissist and because you left him you still have just as much life and possibilites ahead of you as Wayne Gretsky has. (That was before Wayne Gretsky started experiencing a lot of legal problems) So what if some men living on planet earth believe that I am forever diminished in their eyes only because 2 men mistreated me. That is their own problem not mine.
I’m suffering not because I’d my ex wife but for my two boys. She used them as pawns to destroy me knowing that I love my boys. The problem is that my two boys became narcisists as well.
My mind is still blown that my narc ex could seriously call ME a narcissist. It made me question myself for a long time, which is how I found channels like this. I wanted to know if it was true. I felt horrible, thinking that maybe I WAS in the wrong all the time. I don't think that now. But I do still question myself sometimes.
Dear Danish, why a narcissist can forget his 6 year old child? I don't understand why he does this to his own son. He doesn't come to see him or even call to speak to him. The kid is missing him. His father replied to me when I asked him: "I spend my time with whom and on what I want." Thank you.
Narcissists are incapable of loving anyone, they can only imitate it. They perceive others as mere objects to be used. COVERT MALIGNANT NARCISSISTS perceive others as mere objects to be used.
THANKYOU DANISH FOR YOUR WISDOM AND KNOWLEDGE YOU TOTALLY GET IT AND UNDERSTAND THE SHEER ABUSE THAT I AND WE HAVE BEEN THRU YOUR VIDEOS AND CHANNEL IS HELPING US TO UNDERSTAND WHAT WEVE BEEN THRU AND STILL GOING THRU BLESSINGS TO YOU AND YOUR SWEET KITTY CAT 😘🌸💖⚘️🌈🎁
I’m wondering if my parents are this way?? I can point this to my man. But my parents I was told this could be the way I pick these kind n n worse relationships. N my parents defend every ex
Book Your Slot for the online workshop on "How you become trauma bonded and how to break free in 5 powerful steps": emotionalabuserecovery.com/eventbtb
They cannot be trusted in the slightest. The worst person you can encounter. Must be avoided.
Yes!
They teach you to be a better judge of who you can trust.
What makes narcs so dangerous is they are disguised as our mothers, father's, brothers, sisters, husband's, wives, children, neighbors, teachers, bosses, celebrities, coworkers, clergy and friends!!!!! To find out about the reality of the narc condition has been one of the most important truths of my life!!! How I enabled and why I was like that has been a big wakeup!!!! Thank you! 💛. I thank God for the good empathic people everyday!💜
omg this
OMG…. Very very damaging
Exactly. So dangerous! Wishing you a great 2023!!!
When someone hits you, then you KNOW you are in an abusive relationship. But a narcissist destroys you without ever hitting you. You get devaluation, gas lighting, manipulation, "mind screwing", and then when you want to leave, you get love crumbs and empty promises. You can't see that you are trapped in an abusive relationship.
Thats exact. In indian culture marriage is deep penetrated whatever happens it is your life you are destined to live it ,to go through all the trauma esplly they ask whether he hit you. If the answer is no , it is simple for them to tell it is not a problem at all. They will ask the victim to adjust than the narcissist to change. With all this narcissistic trauma it is a hell coming out also.
@@sarah06ish true
Very true. It's a trap
Oh i got hit too
@@darshini4001 so many cultural things keep people trapped in these relationships... just awful
A narcissist is definitely a evil spirit
They make u lose your mind, looks and health that's for sure. Almost 6 months free and I don't think I'll ever get back to being who I used to be
Danish said a narcissist is the weakest person you'll ever come across in your life. That was my assessment of the narc I was involved with because of the obvious parasitic nature of the relationship. I was responsible for EVERYTHING yet somehow he wanted me to believe I needed them.
I didn't know the massive narcissist injury he received at my hands when I constantly asked him to leave. Up to the point I legally evicted him. And gone complete gray rock with no contact.
GOOD riddance!
I'm female. My ex would spike my beer with vodka. For ages I couldn't understand why I would get so drunk. People were commenting that I was so drunk on a night out. I said things to family that was weird because I was so drunk.
I didn't know what was wrong and then one day he did it and a mutual friend saw him and alerted me.
I told him and dumped him. It was criminal and still to this day I'm still upset about it. Worse thing. He used to scream and shout at me for being drunk when he was the one spiking my drink. They are very Sick
Oh yes, he tried his very best but I was too strong for him. When he would start trying to devalue me I would totally rip him apart. He could not beat me with his negative words I became reactive agressive. He was messing with the absolute wrong person. I am an empath but one that will only be pushed but so far. I am done with this extremely sick minded person. The final blow was him cheating on me for a year behind my back. I finally realized that he hated me and he made me hate him too. I am at peace now and moving forward. There is hope u can heal just be stronger than them don't ever forget who u are they cannot take that from u, not ever! Stand strong u survived!
The only way to ķill a narcissist without a gun don't ever engage , don't defend if you have to , don't justify, don't explain and don't persoloze ever!!!! remain cool , calm and collective !!!! Narcissist have ruined billions lives I know for sure people are committing suicide due to the abuse they have been through whether by their peers , colleagues, family members etc....I love and enjoy being alone I'm intact in love with my self until I find healthy individuals and highly educated folks then from I can be able to open up and interact with them .....please don't hurt anyone in this universe just protect yourself and other if you can !!!! I love people with all my heart I will do anything to help and protect them If I could !!!! Take care of yourself sweetheart!!! May our lord protect us from these malicious , vicious , wicked , dangerous and delusional people that existed in this universe !!!! Ameen !!!!
You so beautiful ❤
Same. Good to be strong. 👍🏻👌🏻
Need your text
You are my sister soul, almost identical scenario. Much Love
Worse is their recklessness on the road for example, when one's actual life is endangered and that of one's children.
I'm at the bottom of the barrel,, trying to pull my way back up. From 17 to 57. Still in because of financial matters. But I stay prayed up and I'm thankful for these videos. I've been through it all. I've learned the patterns over the years. Watching the videos validate what I thought all along. Making me feel like I was crazy. I know better now. I watch your videos and prayer videos and stay focused on how to get out and be financially okay. Might be impossible,,but I keep God with me at all times. I pray that anyone who is involved with someone who displays that ungodly behavior,,,run and never look back.
I hate to say it but as long as you stay in the relationship you will never pull yourself back up, if you are with a true narcissist they will not allow it and they are smarter than you. Either accept living in that hell or make a decision in your head to leave COMPLETELY and never look back. Do not say anything to anyone except someone who is bound legally to confidentiality or maybe to one extremely trusted person who is there to help with your escape plan, but be very cautious because a narc has secretly influenced every person in your life….just trust me on this ! Do not write anything down, do not open a bank account, do not sign a lease…..nothing, because trust me they know and will have control over it….how, I don’t know but they will !!!
A plan in your head and stashed cash is your only hope !!! If they find out your plan or suspect something you will pay, you will have further destruction, you will see or have no hope or resources or reliable people and then you will get thrown away as your final punishment ! It could be death, jail, homelessness…..but trust me, you will have no one left because your narc has been busy behind your back !!!!
@@rnupnorthbrrrsm6123 Thank you for taking time out for me. I believe you. Every word. I did all the wrong things. I've been confronting out of frustration. But only screaming truth. I understand about the chatter behind my back. I helped to destroy my image by way of drinking. I don't drink anymore though. Once I learned he was using that to his advantage.. I thank you so kindly for the godly warnings and even for the chat, because as you know, there's no one to talk to and people wouldn't even believe anyway. May god continue to bless you and yours
The frightening thing is when the real person emerges from behind the "false self". They are a completely different person than you thought you knew. It can't be anything short of a Demonic possession.
Yes ! Thats when you see that narc. stare…
This is exactly wut it seems like. She's a fuccn demon
No lie. They can feed on drywall until they shrivel up for all I care.
Yes. I felt with that as well. A completely different person
Bros this here is so true
They live in a World where they do everything on "their" schedule and never show any respect or consideration for you if they make a promise ie Paying you what they owe you. Their thing is "So what if I pay you much later, I was too busy doing Happy Hour, buying a new outfit and if I made you wait, so what, you're lucky that I give you anything." It's like owing 500.00 on a Credit Card and they only pay $150.00 and they think the company should be happy getting anything of not nothing. They are very disturbed.
This video really hit home in a seriously deep way. Narcs are sadists indeed, especially the Coverts.
Don’t forget about the power of patronisation, a form of attack that’s difficult to explain to people outside the relationship who might see the Narc as supportive and caring rather than dominating and controlling.
Believe me, being at the receiving end of daily ‘reminders’ to lock the back door and turn off the lights before going to bed is infuriating!
After forty years of marriage he walked out without warning leaving me without an identity and my world crumbled beneath my feet. It's hard to recover at 62 but I'm doing what I can. The hardest part now is the financial devastation.
I feel for you. Im going through the same right now ❤🩹
@@TheSeekeroftruth1 please pray to God. At least your soul is free now after 40 years. Hope there is a law to punish them. Hope all our prayers will be heard one day.
@@TheSeekeroftruth1 ill pray for you.
stay strong
If you are in the USA, apply for social security! You can get it at age 62. Don't wait to get more " at full retirement age", , that's just a govt con game.
After 7 months I’m still trying to recover from that narcissistic tornado, they really destroy you, I don’t know how someone so evil can exist.
I often wonder how they still walk the earth,the leader probably won't be much longer.
Me, too.
They only love themselves, have no remorse or conciousness ..
Two years for me and it doesn’t seem like it gets any easier 😢
They exist because they are not stopped. We are told that if the new supply contacts us to avoid getting involved. I’m not sure why exactly as people should be aware. Someone I know told me that it’s our responsibility to let someone know if a partner they are involved in has AIDS and I understand the reason because AIDS is a killer, well so is a narcissist. What’s the real difference when you’re going to be destroyed by both, just like cancer. The narcissist is, in my opinion, a destroyer of life just like any disease regardless if it’s from the inside out. As far as I’m concerned they should be identified just like rapist so we can avoid them. I have two narcissists in my life and I make every effort to limit myself around them as I’m fully aware of what they can do, and not just to me even though I’m looked upon as the bad guy which is very typical to their behavior. The big difference between me and them is I’m on this site to inform of my situation and be supportive for others who are struggling. I’m not using my energy to call out their names to expose them or create flying monkeys to take them down which is what they are doing to me. I hope that coercion control regardless of positive or negative becomes illegal in this country 👍👍👍👍👍👍👍
That 'smear' campaign can go both ways 😏😏 learning from the best after all; the difference is by exposing the narcissist one is merely telling the truth and then they themselves do the 'work' of living and proving they are EXACTLY what you presented them to be 😁 (that is in the case of third parties, friends, people who actually care to know 'what's happened to your relationship'). They might lie, pretend and try to manipulate, but their karma and real circumstances never do, it's there in plain sight 🙏🏻 they don't stand a chance when the TRUTH is spoken, that mask drops so quick!
you hit the nail on the head!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and the worst part is when family and friends do not see the dark cruel side of the narcissist.................all they see is to good side, and they label you as a lazy, crazy, selfcentered and stupid and whiney complainer...........
"They leave dry to die." So accurate!
Had a special connection with a narcissist in a long distance. He will swept you of ur feet when he is trying to build a relationship with u. During the course of the relationship, u can feel that there is really something wrong with that person, sort of like a psychotic one. The best thing to do is to ignore whatever bad things they are saying to u, which i am very good at that (ignoring 😅) Bcoz, once u give-in and replied back - the convo will never end and he will always bring the same topic again and again. I dont think that a narcissist will ever change.. so if u notice a narcissistic type of behavior from a man - run and dont look back!
Yeah, i noticed in the first 2 interactions that something was off. 6th sense dont lie i guess. After 5 months i blocked everything. Im not an idiot to stick around... 1st weird behaviour i forgave, 2nd i distanced myself for 2 months and when i saw nothing changed, i got the fuck away. End of story.
My 13 years ex husband was a covert narcissist. When I left him, I left behind dispersed throughout 13 years of marriage: myself, myself esteem, my joy fullness , my health. I built him but he destroyed me. I built his finances. I left with few boxes filled with books, clothing and few cook ware and 4K to start all over again hundred miles away from him. I have not ONE good memory out of 13 years. He looked down at my friends when they visited me. The strange thing I had Zero trauma bound.
Coming out of 13 years marriage, On the other hand, I dated an overt narc for 7 months. 5 months later I am still trying to break the trauma bonding. Still pushing back hard on the hoovering. Still crying. I remember only the good times. Go figure!
i tried for 40 years to bring peace into my marriage and sadly that never happened. i just figured we had a “ messed up relationship “ i never ever heard the term narcissistic behavior until a year ago. But now I know. In the best way to get past it? Zero contact. Any contact would just be playing into her Web. Hang on guys, stand tall . time is the healer 🙏🏼 and Prayer 🙏🏼
Thats sound like life imprisonment. God is with you.
@@darshini4001 Amen, And God helped me reconnect with a Good Lady i have known since we were 5 years old. she knows me and i know her. i feel so Blessed to have her again. Thank you Lord 🙏🏼. ps , your shows have helped me so much 💕
Brushing thier teeth feels like moving a mountain!!
It's so so true 😢.
Thank you so much for all your videos. What you say is so true. You don’t realize what is going on. It hit me when you said brushing your teeth was like moving a mountain…that’s exactly how it felt. I had gained so much weight, my health was failing, he wouldn’t let me sleep with his arguing at night and I felt like I was losing my memory and my mind. It wasn’t until I was scared I could actually have a heart attack and leave my girls with no mother that I decided to take care of myself. AND that was the beginning of my enlightenment bc he didn’t want me to get better but at that point I didn’t care what he said. Bless you and don’t stop what your doing bc it might help people get out of these relationships sooner.
Man, you are getting better and better, every next video is getting better and better. every sentence you say is worth in gold. Every sentence you say is imprtant ! 👍
I just came out of a narcissistic relationship. After months of back and forth, I painfully managed to do the discarding myself before my ex-fiance could do it. The first time I caught him messaging women behind my back, my therapist had me start reading up on narcissism. It was the best thing I ever did. I started to see between the lies. The reading up was hard. My mind has not functioned properly in 9 months. It started shutting down on me before I went to see her. My fiancé encouraged me to see a therapist. He said I needed help. After 20 minutes in the room with my therapist, she started explaining crazy making to me. I refused to believe her. I was angry with her, until I caught him that first time, offering other women money for nude photos. Then I started listening. The last time I caught him, I knew exactly what was happening. I beat him to the smear campaign. But my mind is not the same now. It doesn't feel like it will ever be the same. Memories of the abuse I suppressed are starting to surface. I am having terrible nightmares. I want my mind back. I don't even know who I am anymore. My family has had to sit and watch me deteriate. They are all praying for me. They see him for who he is.
Whenever I see any video on narcissists it made me puzzled and dragged me back into the memory lane which are associated with my deceased husband. Was he ?was he not ? As a sufferer and living with narcissist can't let u see clearly that u were giving ur precious moments to a person who doesn't care about u, no matter what u do!! Videos info make me feel like a fool that I remained unaware through out this process. And gives me goosebumps!!
This has been my experience and then some. Sociopath in my opinion. She came off as a young beautiful soccer mom. But if I am honest, there were red flags that I didn't heed and some that I wasn't aware of. I am well aware of what to look for now but, I don't think I'm willing to risk it again. The relationship was so toxic it damn near killed me.
Your videos are very clear Danish, and easy to understand how to recover from Narc abuse.
Thank you, I am on my way out of a smear campaign and these really remind me to focus on me and carry on.
Its better to get over a problem when you understand its origin. 😊😊 less confusion and more clarity.it does not change or stop the toxic person but your response is then healthy and controlled towards their flying monkeys. As well as them. It's not easy but with practice it gets better especially when you can't leave a job. No contact is the best solution.
Yup. There should be jail time for these monsters.
You’re awesome Danish! 👍🏽 Listen to him people, he hits the nail on the head every time. If someone is insecure and doesn’t love themselves, how can they love you?! Or on the flip side if they love themselves too much there isn’t anything left over lol
The thing that is most dangerous is the fact there is NO LIMIT the depths of depravity they will go to in order to attain their goal or advance their motive/plot line. They will hurt you, manipulate you, destroy you without a care in the world - as long as it serves THEM. No matter how small or minor the ‘win’ is, they don’t care how much it costs YOU…even if that means your life or the wellbeing of your children. To them, a gain is a gain.
I am not exaggerating. I do not mean this metaphorically or hypothetically. They can and they WILL run you straight into the ground. Love is not going to heal them. Prayer is not going to save them. At least, not before they destroy you (and everything you knew to be reality).
So true in every single word! NO LIMIT of the depth of their evil. Love? When they sense a trace of love they'd like a leach senses a trace of blood they'd suck you dry. Remember they're always looking for any chance to harm people (family members or not) without being convicted. And I am not exaggerating!
@S BT 💯💯💯 Oh, I know you’re right.
Mine explained to me in great detail exactly how he wanted to (would?) physically harm me & not get in much trouble, if he got in trouble at all. Also, how he wanted to/would frame me for crimes, get our son taken away (and given to his mother who abandoned him as a child, of course!) Etc etc etc… The fact he even ***thinks*** like this scares me…as if I wasn’t scared of him enough already…
All bad.
@@tiffanybluetarot No one could realize how real the demons are in this world until you meet one, especially that person is your family member or friend... At the beginning I thought a covert malignant narcissist is just a mean person, but as the time passes I've realized their evil trait is so deep... deep to the level that I believe demons are among us. We need to educate ourselves to avoid those with all cost as they act very well and often they go after people with high levels of empathy.
@@peacefulearth4us 💯💯💯🙏
Omg this is all so true it took me five years of therapy and hard work to recover from a lifetime of narcissistic abuse . I was used abused and discarded my father, my brother, my husband, my youngest son . Now i worry about my grandkids. Ultimately to avoid constantly being sucked into the daily dramatics and hurts they cause each other .
I Have been labeled as “crazy”.
Ok ..and? I Have to look away and focus on what I can do in those world not what I can not change.
Yes... We have to cut the tires and walk away... Even if family
My depression caused by the narcissist almost made me commit suicide.
They are not worth your being. there LOSS Move On.
Thank you. I appreciate your kindness. ❤️💕🙏😊
So glad you didn't ♥️
Same for me. It was a really dark place and still is some days. They just move on like nothing happened.
So happy you are still living ....I felt the same way these videos are so important but I also had to meet with a therapist and put on medication for depression and PTSD .... You are worth all good things take care of yourself 🙏
My dad always twists the truth just to win every argument. He even has sarcasm so waxed, that no matter how the story turns out, he's always right. Then he gloats at you in triumph.
Once again, you hit the nail on the head 🎯🎯🎯
I share all your information and videos to educate clients I work with who are victims of domestic violence and they all tell me they finally "get it" and that just one of your videos is worth more than 30 years of "therapy".
Good advise. 3 years out. Not once has he asked me how I was and the 10 animals he left me with.
Not worth bruising your knuckles on, walk away, don't explain yourself, because they know, but can't admit that they're the problem, the more you explain what the problem is, the more they shift it to you. Give them some back, ghost them, move on....eventually they find someone else with weak boundaries.....
I can said sincerely thta by the Grace of God. After one year i was praying because i saw all this thing thta were happening and i couldn't understand but i thought it was me the problem all the time. One time i was so tired of it. I asked God if i should leave and he said yes, so i left thta day. I never came back thank God, once i was away i was able to see things better and after i started to see videos and see how all the this they said match with his conducts i couldn't believe it. I never thought i would be with someone like thta. We were married for only a year. Now i feel healed. I think it was the fact thta we were together not thta long and also, God is who can give thta power in the spirit to stay strong and keep going with u life. I feel very happy the way how i have been so strong to stay away from him. I do still think about him but i feel it is less and less, now, by the grace of God see thing better and i feel mostly free. i have faith thta God the same way he is got him out from the beginning. He would finish it. Only God has giving the strength and the power to overcome such a horrible experience. THANK U JESUS MY SAVIOR!!
So true. I was left with our six months daughter and my ex took off to advance his career in NY, lying about our future and saying he never really wanted children. He replaced me with a younger model and nine years of our fake love fell apart. God helped us and I went through hell.
It is so weird because he seems so secure and have all together
(@ 3:35) - they do evoke fear in various ways in their victims, and I think, if you wonder whether you should be afraid of them during the ups and downs of the relationship,, later you will reluctantly perhaps, conclude, that they are fearsome creatures... :) true, you don't need to be afraid of them, but you can be concerned about the loss of time in your life, when you could have been being your happy calm self
You so beautiful ❤
I think I got very lucky. I saw him for what he was and got the hell away.
Really helpful for a deeper understanding of narcissistic personality, thank-you dear Danish ❤
When you take back whatever is left of your power and your belongings, and leave, they say that you are “killing” them. Can not figure that one out. You leave without support, empty and in pain. Your being had been surviving on life support by that time. Why do we feel like they actually need us?
The best definition by far!! Great job Danish for the clarity and making this video comprehensible ✨️
This video describes me. Thank you for this video ♥️ This information is very helpful with my mental and emotional healing journey ♥️
It takes much fortitude, knowledge, personal integrity to not be a victim of a narc. These things are like your superpowers...a narc can't really get by them if you are strong enough.
You always nailed on this subject. Congratulations
One of the best chanells.
My 1st husband narcissist awakened me on Christmas morning by pulling me out of bed by my hair, throwing me on the floor, kicking in the back, punching me in the ear and telling me if I did not wrap his family's presents he would kill me
"Do this, Do that"
But if you listen, and have expertise, it is nonsense
One I realized this, I stepped away
The priority is to tell you what to do, to make themselves feel better
The amazing thing I learned, is they haven't a clue even about the most elementary understanding of what they are talking about
The result is to run you around in *silly* circles.
I prefer not to be silly
Ronald McDonald I've noticed that highly narcissistic individuals seem to enjoy giving unsolicited advice and can see the funny side now when people, whose lives are in much worse states than mine, start criticising me and tell me what to do!
I've even been told by a few of them that I need to see someone about my issues, which I've been doing on and off for many years anyway. I still tend to get angry with them at times though, hence why they seem to be avoiding me now. 😊
What really threw me off was, I was so focused on her first affair, and understanding affairs by paying attention to affair websites and how people can overcome affairs , I never considered my ex was a narcissist. Now EVERYTHING makes sense. We’re divorced. I’m in Pennsylvania, she’s in Montana with 10 cats in her parents basement at age 46
I’m 50 years old never had a speeding ticket in my life a perfect record !!!!!!!!!!! In one and a half months the cops came to my house four times and put me in handcuffs 😳I was about to have A panic attack in that car good thing one of the police men I knew and he knew me and he figured it out how was the evil one and innocent one
my own mother and siblings are predators!! omgosh!! no wonder i feel so devastation throughout my entire 50 years of life!! no wonder i want to die..thank you for validating my living hell
You want to die but don’t give in. That will ensure that they win.
Although I don’t know you, I believe in you.✨
I have been there and come out totally healed and happy , you can do it too , you see what has happened , now go gently on yourself one day at a time , Death is a big fear for Narc families and they collectively project it on to their chosen target just to prove to them selves that they are the strong ones, please don't own what is no yours , build your physical health through rest and lots of quiet self care , sleep as much as you can ,Micheal Sealy meditations as I lay down at night brought me to gradual acceptance of my own strength and worth , Go for it , Love and very best wishes to you from the West of Ireland.
Lowering self respect is most difficult
Please say more than stay away from Narcissists to stay safe. Please talk to those of us who have had their lives and sense of self ALREADY destroyed by Narcissists as to what we do about it to restore what was taken?
Leaving and staying away is literally the most important step you need to take. The next step is therapy and self healing...but all of that can quickly be undone by not staying away..that's why he (and many other narcissist specialists) stress this so much
You know, I offended wondered why they wanted me around because I am physically disabled and need help , I'm so different from them .the fact that it was more than 20 years ago I could not just reach out ,that made a big difference in the beginning . Now I can reach out to the help I need
Had to set alot of boundaries and not cave on them
I have been really blessed with my friends who have been helping out and giving me courage
Man I am still working on hard on my life
I have a Narcissist mother and sister they both co operate and hides each others mistakes my raising their voices ( bilkul ghabrahat wali ) their tone at that time is too much dramatic, they easily put each others mistakes under the carpet , but tried to pin point and make a fuss of mine, and shows that how much work have been extended because of my mistakes and How much they are suffering because of my mistakes , they always seem resent full , holding on to some kind of grudge , many times randomly, which makes me confuse , I am always feeling heavy ups and downs of crushing feelings which makes me overwhelmed, consumed and occupied to the point I feel buzzing sensation , hot and cold breese on my chest , struggle to be my true self , I struggle to make a safe surrounding around me and the total in an out vibe that can remove darkness they have penetrated inside me , plus the bread crumbs of love bombing keeps you stuck , I figured it out much later , they are great liars they convey deceptively honest looking expressions.
The look is predatory even in recent you haven't done anything displeasing to them , you can sense the danger of them even if you are not looking at them the Eerie and creepy feeling, they would tries to avoid you when you share your happy news and will accuse you harshly or feel very bad which shows on their over all body language that they are hurt (innocently ), they drag you in that zone , they try their best to show pity and shaming you what you are doing as a reflex action
Imagine the scariest monster you can ever imagine, and that monster is a Narcissist.
My XN still has me messed up 5 months later. I try to push it down and not cry but this damage he did is so deep, that I don't feel human anymore 💔 😔 😢
It can take a long time ( years) to heal...Be kind to yourself. Mental and emotional wounds are more difficult to recover from than physical injuries. Eating well, bathing, loving plants or an animal (or both,) something creative...These skills can help in returning to yourself. Never believe that a narcissist can change...And find out, if you will, what it is within yourself that attracts them. Because otherwise they'll keep finding you. I've wasted my whole life not knowing what these creatures are and trying to love one after the other. I finally finally found out what I was dealing with. The last one tried to annihilate me, which is what they do. I had to do a lot of chord cutting spiritual exercises and psychic protection work to get him out of my space. That is really important because they'll keep syphoning your energy. Get rid of of any mementos, gifts, pictures, letters, everything.
They put you in victim mode - GET OUT OF IT ! You must not stay in this bad place - cry all you like and get the hurts out then decide to cry no more and move on.Surely all the signs were there - why did you get involved with this person ? Learn from all this and move on wiser and stronger.
@@eagleeye2300 I'm in NC (no contact) and I don't care to see him ever again. Or talk to him for that matter. My first holidays without him. It's hard. I cry alot because the damage hits the surface and I'm dealing with it. Have a counselor yes, and I listen to Danish daily on all platforms and he answers many questions I'll never get answers to. I don't know why I attract them. My past is not one I discuss openly. Except I think I attracted this narc because I just got out of a physical abusive relationship of 10 years and thought 2 years off was good then... met him... and thought it was all ok. I can look back at texts and see the lies in the beginning. But I didn't know. I'm doing things for me. Soon I'm getting a haircut. Ok sounds silly but 15 years of no one touching my hair and now I'm doing this change, to me is huge. I lost so much weight after him. Breakup diet... gained a little back but I'm being good to myself. Last night I wanted cheesecake. Usually I'd be belittled by my xn and last night I said I can go get some so I did. Was a happy camper. So I'm trying. These things all seem small to those who have never been through this abuse, to me every little thing I'm doing is a milestone. Tears and all. Hugs
@@feeltheforce10 You either have never been involved with a narc or experienced the abuse. No the signs weren't there. No I didn't choose to seek out a narc. We don't. They're so good at masks, mirroring, hiding secrets, degrading you, to every mental emotional game there is.. There's so much depth to this. Victim mode yeah they do, do this. I'm not choosing to stay here or there or wherever. I'm trying to heal.
@@yakityakteriw6774 Yes i have horrendous experience with a Narc - sadly a family member that i had to cut ties with 100% and life is great now so i have plenty of knowledge how they operate etc etc.Signs are always there - you said about the masks degrading you etc etc - they are all signs.
You are wiser now so i hope you get out of the victim mode quickly and heal from it all.EFT tapping is great to release all the emotions and hurts you hold - look it up on here EFT TAPPING - its easy to do and gets rid of all the junk you dont need to carry around anymore.
The most shocking revaluation was finding out he was a thief. It's devastating enough to be discarded, for no reason. Well there was a reason. He got what he wanted, he stole from me. Once he got what he came for then came the discard and he then he disappeared without a good bye. I supposed the disappearance was a test, he expected me to come to him and talk him back into the relationship. But that's not what happened. When he just left, I did nothing. I did not attempt contact him. I went grey rock. I waited 3 days and then I dropped off a Dear John letter, letting him know I'd never be back and i was nice, but I made it clear he would never be allowed back into my life. . I told him we'd never be friends. It was about a month later I realized he had stolen from me. So if I reasoned with him and got him to come back, I know it would have been the green light for him to have stolen even more. Yes, narc are dangerous. A zombie would be a step up from a narc.
Yes, they steal, I was also shocked
I did almost reach out to my sister earlier....but somtn was like....PLEASE DON'T DO IT!! NO! NO! NO! There is no love there.. keep moving onnnn! And I was obedient.
I thought I was a narcissistic person. I was the one with the power in the relationship. I see now what it is. It messed me up big time. I now understand.
I'm a vedic priest..one got on my property..he threatened to kill me..stole my house, money,slandered me..left me to die..just destroyed 6th car..haven't shopped in 4 years...pretended to be a devotee...worst thing I've ever had.. still here...destroyed my camp 2 nights ago...I'll never get over it..he molests his daughter..I called cops...now he's trying to kill me.
Everything you say is so right. It gives a person insight as to the way you have to be around this person if you can’t leave. 😢
it is the most destructive experience i have ever had :( he left me wounded and fraid of everything!! even afraid to go to any social place where i can find him!!
Unpredictability. You never know who you are waking up next to. Today could be a great one, or it could be a crying and screaming tantrum all directed at you for absolutely no reason. To say that would make you anxious is an understatement. They use that fear to control you and make you dance to their tune so they can feel powerful.
My biggest flaw? Giving benefit of countless doubts
You are doing a great job for many People🙏🏽🙏🏽
Imagine that the source of this pain are both parents. Only other member of family, or some friends that analyze the situation, can help you heal, and gain some understanding of reality.
Everyday there is this futile exchange of words. I often feel don’t speak don’t hurt. He turns almost everything I say into some other format that I feel like there is no way to communicate.
Example: we golfed today. At the end of golf he asked if I wanted to get something to eat, I said no we have chicken at home and I can make you whatever you would like. He is pouting now he had a chili hotdog less than two hours ago. So we get home and again I offer to make him something to eat. He says I don’t want anything right now. Not 10 minutes go by and he is microwaving a portion of chicken and I’m like go for it, I did not say a word and decided to just let it go because everything is so senseless. But he also was mad about his golfing. I suggested he take another club with him and of coarse he refused, then when he needed the club he refused to take he needed it in the end. He projected it on me like it was my fault. I said well sometimes it better to take three clubs to be prepared for the end shots. He again “ oh like you do that all the time” I never see you take three clubs. I said I do if I’m not sure about the shot I need to make. Well I never see you do that!!!
So since wee are home from golf I have chosen not to engage in any form of dialogue with him. It’s the safe place because I can’t. There is a never knowing what I ask say or interject it’s always scrutinized to fit what he thinks and believes, right or wrong? So I bail and let him do and be whatever.
Yes do I feel betrayed and in a constant array of what to do and how to get away so I don’t say something that he slings shit at me with? YES no end to it. He says I ask him questions no matter what he does or says. It was over turning on the light above the kitchen table. The light was coming through the window and he was putting on his golf shoes and I did ask why the light? Then it was on from there. After my chastising of how “no matter what he does I have to constantly question him down to wiping the table off after breakfast I’m the reason for even asking, he has no rights!!!
So I’m in silent mode don’t care don’t want don’t need pretty much sums it up. See how petty and childish this is? No room for error ever. His way or NO way!!!
I agree that narcissists are dangerous. However I disagree that all those who have been victimized by a narcissist will be forever diminished by the trauma suffered. Because none of us believers in the Lord are ever going to be altogether alone.
@Amanda on the Internet I was in a women's shelter telling a social worker once the same thing. She disagreed with me while I was saying to her that I will never be the happy, healthy, sweet and innocent person that I was before the narcissist diminished me. She responded by saying good that you are not the same person as you were while getting duped into marriage to a narcissist and because you left him you still have just as much life and possibilites ahead of you as Wayne Gretsky has. (That was before Wayne Gretsky started experiencing a lot of legal problems) So what if some men living on planet earth believe that I am forever diminished in their eyes only because 2 men mistreated me. That is their own problem not mine.
I’m suffering not because I’d my ex wife but for my two boys. She used them as pawns to destroy me knowing that I love my boys. The problem is that my two boys became narcisists as well.
Very good and clear explanation, thank you!
My mind is still blown that my narc ex could seriously call ME a narcissist. It made me question myself for a long time, which is how I found channels like this. I wanted to know if it was true. I felt horrible, thinking that maybe I WAS in the wrong all the time. I don't think that now. But I do still question myself sometimes.
Very true
My daughter has done all this to me ...I feel very bad and sad always
Dear Danish, why a narcissist can forget his 6 year old child? I don't understand why he does this to his own son. He doesn't come to see him or even call to speak to him. The kid is missing him. His father replied to me when I asked him: "I spend my time with whom and on what I want." Thank you.
Narcissists are incapable of loving anyone, they can only imitate it. They perceive others as mere objects to be used. COVERT MALIGNANT NARCISSISTS perceive others as mere objects to be used.
THANKYOU DANISH FOR YOUR WISDOM AND KNOWLEDGE YOU TOTALLY GET IT AND UNDERSTAND THE SHEER ABUSE THAT I AND WE HAVE BEEN THRU YOUR VIDEOS AND CHANNEL IS HELPING US TO UNDERSTAND WHAT WEVE BEEN THRU AND STILL GOING THRU
BLESSINGS TO YOU AND YOUR SWEET KITTY CAT 😘🌸💖⚘️🌈🎁
As a covert non-abusive narc I actually like your videos because I hate the malignant, abusive npd peopel too xD much love❤
This is exactly happening to me right now 😢
You are so right I had a narcissit
My narcissist friend tried to destroy my marriage
Mentioning the word “human” because they’re not human period!
The unpredictability and how volitale
Thank you
Thanks danishji
Their phoniness
Because lots of people never see them comming or they refuse to believe criminals come in uniforms also
Thanks 😊 very true ll appreciate your videos very helpful 🙏🙏💙
I experienced this...
Thank you so much for the info
Thank you so much.x
Very very Professional👏👏👏👍🙌
i think you meant the anniliation of a person...not the inhalation..... no matter, you're videos are authentic and life saving
very good Danish xo.
I have question Bashir, did we ever have confessions from a narcissist?
I am able to control to do the no contact but he never stops
I’m wondering if my parents are this way?? I can point this to my man. But my parents I was told this could be the way I pick these kind n n worse relationships. N my parents defend every ex
Do they get completely silent after break-up for several days?
Can you please tell me.
How to stay together with a mother narcissistic