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- Опубліковано 5 вер 2024
- Tim teaches you this week how to start a fake business, being back on Keto, the downsides of living in California, and a Satanic AirBnB.
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Shill
No you're a little big
I like what you're doing but there were too many bits interrupting the ads. People are gonna start mistaking this commercial for a podcast.
well well he finally returns about time Mr. POTUS Tim Dillon
You get a fake business and you get a fake business. We all get fake businesses!!!
This podcast is so unique to me. It's like a new stand up comedy special every week on current events. Tim is a genius.
Henrie Bryce hope to see you in the Rothschilds. It's worth it.
Even the ads are funny
Soooo much better than Last Week Tonight w/ John Oliver.
this is his niche.no one comes close to his on the spot comic genius.
There is no one like him, this guy is the best out there right now.
27:15 The way Tim says “Good, buddy, how are you?” and then leaves zero air for him to respond is peak fake businessman.
so true. fake business is serious business.
That made me so happy for some reason.
it's next level fake business
A valuable skill to have doing fake business
He actually asked it twice lmao
Tim has the only healthy negative energy ive seen yes or yes
what a remarkable and balanced concept
That is the prefect definition of his comedic perspective 🤣👏
Some chaos in there too
I choose "yes", because I'm not a degenerate that chooses the other answer.
Healthy negative energy lmao
Fake business is a cash cow. No overhead. Huge profit margins.
Speaking of which...I’m looking to move some turquoise jewelry
Have you seen this video of Joe? It’s hilarious!!
ua-cam.com/video/kbWGdmGNae8/v-deo.html
@@bigdickbandit9943 What are we thinkin price wise?
Wen IPO or SPAC? I'm all in
I’m into moving manure.
Listening to this while sitting through a virtual DUI class. Feel like this is what Tim would have wanted
Your a hero sir🙏
@@robertnicklesii3342 for making himself a danger to society
@@BasilHagens I’m sure he already understands that. Let him make lite of his shitty situation for a moment
I had to do that once. I also had to wear an ankle bracelet because of the DUI
@@jscarp86 no ankle bracelet but had to attach a breathalyzer to my vehicle
"Ben Shapiro took 75 jobs to Tennessee, Joe Rogan took 1 job to Texas, Jamie Vernon" --
LMFAO
Actually I think ONE Shapiro guy dropped out and tried to go on his own. But of course I think he's forgotten quickly without all the SEO....
@@OffGridInvestor klavan or knowles?
There is no way Tim doesn’t blow up and become one of the most popular comics in the world. So naturally hilarious on the mic, on the stage and in sketches.
He too real
only after he dies
My only guess is that he upset the wrong people by being too real. He’s probably the funniest dude in the world next to Nick Mullen.
6 Tübermensch 9 Theo Von>Nick Mullen
His comedy is not for everyone dude, I fucking love the guy, but his comedy is very very very dark and most people don’t enjoy that.
This podcast belongs as a radio station on a Grand Theft Auto game.
This is the best idea ever
YES! This is what i thought of minutes after watching haha
You're bang on
so true
Yes or Yes
I'm writing tim dillon this election year. Hes the only person I can trust.
Yes or yes ?
Totally Lost yes
Yes and yes
Tim J Dillon the hope of the people
Yes and yes
Yes cheers to life in the big city
Tim, I work for the city of Los Angeles, and we are rolling out a new program called H2H- homeless 2 Hotdogs. We’re gonna round up homeless people like beef cattle and turn them into hotdogs for low income people. It’s a win win. God bless.
there will be a noticeable uptick in the quality of hotdogs tbh, with the exception of the occasional fentdog
@@josephgilboy6259nothing like a fentdog after a hard day at work
Finally someone went after the real enemy: Firefighters
they save these kids from abusive parents then hand them right over to their even more abusive friends in Child Protective Services, it's sickening what they do to these kids.
@@drewcundari8773 what should they do with the kids if that happens?
Buy them a ridge wallet.
@@cdubsoptional7849 and don't forget that promo code
@R D What promo code?
Dying laughing at the fake business, I did not believe him
When Tim fake laughed with the Realtor I lost it
Same. Fake business is up there with life in the big city
And then when Ben real laughed at Tim’s fake laugh THAT got me
Ben's story is just as wild as Tim's. Went from being raised in the Amish community to slinging heroin out of a petstore. Or something along those lines. Either way, dude's a legend.
Hunter The Based God the difference is that he changed his life
@@cdubsoptional7849 how do you know this. Is there a podcast he is on?
I like it when Tim Yells at us, it helps remind us how low garbage people we are. Thanks Timmy!
A humbling experience
The fact that Tim is THIS competent in commercial real estate... He could legitimately do VERY well.
He can do it all
He was a sub prime mortgage broker 😎😎
Yeah, he talks all about it on the Ryan Sickler show!
Yes he would definitely, the guy knows what he's talking about and he does say he likes real estate very much.
He used to be in real estate. He’s such a talker he could do well in any sales job
This may be the best one yet. If this podcast was on the stock exchange it would be buy, buy, buy.
In the real stock market what would be a buy buy buy now though ? Help a brother out here 😂
@@fares123 GameStop
"You can just call people and pretend to be the person you are meant to be." #fakebusiness
"Yes or yes"
Hi Cyn. You’re beautiful
@Roland Deschain Hi! Thank you for your lovely comment ^_^
Stunningly beautiful indeed 😍
Very beautiful indeed!
“There’s a certain type of person that is cut out to build an empire that doesn’t really exist, and I am that person.”
Fake business is the best idea... There's ironically a lot of money to be made there....
dan dan. yeah be careful if you actually make money doing it, i think that is called fraud
Let me read your palm for just $5, you might have a fake business in your future I can foresee for you
Well if u are interested I'm reselling a fake keto chocolate chip biscuits business,, any offers
Half of the SaaS industry is
That's basically "The wolf of Wall Street" in a nutshell!
I just LOVE IT when Tim does the whole “I’m gonna kill your family if you don’t buy this product” thing. Lmao
Other podcasts are interrupted instantly as soon as I see Tim's notification.
Hes the podcast KILLAH
I've never started ditching Rogan faster than when I started listening to Timmy Boy.
Yes or yes!
I even stop having sex when I sense that a Tim's podcast is uploaded
I am a social worker who works with the homeless, I am now going to try the "LA is soooooo OVER, now!" Tactic.
Just pee in their tents.
Just put a boulder in front of your office door
@niveajones you should generate content highlighting this tactic with the homelessness population
I have 17 pairs of Raycons and a year’s supply of Magic Spoon because Tim keeps threatening my life. Help.
@Mike lee. Lmao
You seem like a easy target so while I have you can I interest you In some jewles
The only way to survive is to invest in Jewels by Podcaster Tim Dillon.
Why can’t we have the homeless fighting the fires? Win, win.
eeeasy kamala
We use criminals
Tim is a bit off on firefighters. For one, you don't send all your fighters out because you need people to fight house fires and respond to other emergencies.
Secondly, just putting water on doesn't always work. Once it leaves the hose, it disperses and the heat of the fire turns portions of that to steam.
Third, the fires are more out of control because COVID keeps the prisoners in prison and not fighting fires.
They're 78% water so it should work
@@pwalker1360 he knows. It was an exaggerated joke.
Tim roasting firefighters more than the flames would
Heo Price wooooosh
@Heo Price RBG identified as a female Mr mind reader.
@Heo Price lounging around I'm sure
Most underrated comment here.
I love the way Elizabeth Sharp was "kidnapped" then held for weeks yet never was more than a mile from her home. Being graped or draped the whole time. Yeah, riiiiight. Never tied down, her "kidnappers" door right there, unlocked the whole time. Her story is all about adding to the myth that females don't like doing it.
Title of every episode: “Tim Dillon performs to audience of one, and KILLS! Not clickbait!”
Its a shame these are only an hour long.
Join patreon like us , extra podcast every week. 😳😳😳
The patreon episodes are godly
Nick life in the big city
Fantomas Fanto are they video or just audio?
Yeah it's too bad GOD only gives us an hour of his time every week.
Tim's fake business is hilarious.
His perspective about the whole thing is hilariously genius.
Tim Dillon does melt steel beams.
👏🏼Bravo sir
Well what else would Sam Hyde use to take down the towers?
@kathy kelly Sam Hyde? Isn't he the guy they arrested in Kenosha?
Call me Weber!
Charles Johnston he can’t keep getting away with it
Tim Dillon and his podcast pulled me out of rock bottom.
"They're conducting real business, I'm conducting fake business and never the two shall meet!"
The old school Burger King French toast sticks were highly slept on
Still are
As well as the jack in the box French toast sticks. So unfortunate they are discontinued
#bringbackjackintheboxfrenchtoaststicks
Noah Lopez Good they’re ass compared to MickeyD’s breakfasts
Sunny do you want to fight or something?
The dipability was everything.
I can't believe Better Help started advertising on here again ahahahaha
@Randall Marsh last week, I got an email from the company I work for, saying that in light of these unprecedented, troubling times, all employees and their families now have free access to... you guessed it, better help! Next thing you know, they'll be offering us jewels in lieu of health benefits
I thought it was butter help. I've gained 18 pounds in 28 days. It didn't help.
I can.
@@cdubsoptional7849 did your company tell you to use the promo code tim for 10% off because if they did then I think you may be working for one of Tim's fake businesses
@@cdubsoptional7849 You will wish they offered Jewels by Podcaster Tim Dillon instead of healthcare. Once you see that sparkle, you'll forget all about your children's rotting kidneys
How many kids are off school? Just give each one a supersoaker send them to the woods and defund the fire department. It's a win win
I actually took Tim's class 9/11: A Closer Look when I was an undergrad at Princeton
"Sometimes you gotta block people because fake business is getting very intense"
😂
Yes, especially when the other end thinks they are doing real business & are near closing.
The only thing more slim and sleek than Tim is our Ridge wallets
LOL
Slimmer than both towers.
Got mine Friday
Tim's ads are the embodiment of "bad publicity is good publicity".
It's sad that Tim is the straightest comic in LA
Sad? Or true progress?
Zamod lol
Ahahahaha
Sad? Yes. Yes? Yes.
It goes :
1.Brendan schaub
2.bryan callans
3.Tim Dillon
"fake business doesn't always work out the way you want it to"
"He just wants somebody to care about him, even if they're trying to kill him."
Hella relatable
Augustus would be proud...
"You ever have a fire in your kitchen? Its easy" 😂😂😂
"The firefighters started the fires because they were jealous the cops were getting all the attention". I'm taking that one back to the work canteen on Monday.
i just learned more from tim dillons fake business class then i did in any high school class.
Dude that firefighter bit was straight out of GTA. I’m dying bro.
Tim Dillon 2020
"Can You Do Any Worse?"
"Yes or Yes?!"
I'm going to make this t-shirt and not give you 50 percent
I think this is the first time I've seen Tim wear something other than a polo or a bedspread.
The podcast from the bed.
hahahahaha a bed spread holy Christ
16:55
I have so much respect for advertisers that let Tim do these ads. I’m much more likely to buy their product now listening to this ad than I am listening to any other ad. Now I’m still not buying it… but I’m closer than I’ve ever been.
Ben and timmy doing the lords work to make life in the big city more bearable.
*sips wine* "Life in the big city..."
Its a knife fight out there
I started my fake business yesterday and have already earned $63. All tax free. Without Tim, none of this would have been possible. Thanks Tim, you changed my life.
Tim Dillon is The only thing i look forward to now.
Help me
This man is such a national treasure, Im surprised nick cage hasnt tried to steal him yet.
Gold
Tim is a fire chief and pathologist. Why is he not helping these fires while providing social distance requirements? Because Tim is benefiting from this.
Tim is in bed with big fire.
I like Ben. There was a kid like Ben at my school growing up who was straight laced and respectful. But he too was also the best audience when it came to saying horrific jokes or things about nearby people. I can only imagine the fun Tim has while out and about with ol Churchy Ben.
The influencer killer, the poached egg slinger, T.J.DILLON!
I’m
Tim Dillon is THE GOAT. Not top 5, not best of his time, THE BEST TO EVER DO IT. Give this guy a week and he gives you a special for free. SALUTE The GENERAL!!
NO DUNCAN, NO PEACE
We must shout it from the rooftops!!!
If I get to see Tim and Trussell together my life will be complete.
He’s talking about the dog
@@MrMichaelcw thank you! But my absurd wish remains.
@@MrMichaelcw yes and yes.
Duncan interviewing Duncan trussel on The Tim Dillon Show
Now a Trussel Dillion ticket would be a winner. Trussel making people feel good about life and them self and Dillion pulling all the levers.
Yes or Yes?
As a client of Tim Dillon I for one am very satisfied with the level of protection he is providing.
I miss the dog knocking down the set.
Only thing that could have made it better is if Fido would have taken a Cleveland steamer
@@rickybobby2789 his name was Duncan.
Show some respect, that Dog is worth more than you.
Duncan. Remember his name!
Hunter Thompson
Lol respect ✊🏿
Have you seen this video of Joe? It’s hilarious 😆
ua-cam.com/video/kbWGdmGNae8/v-deo.html
Tim in a MAGA hat with Candace Owens on the porch of an airbnb singing "Independence Day" by Martina McBride while Oscar the cat fires an AK47 in the background is the greateast, most American image one could possibly conceive.
the best image Tim has ever presented to us
guys make a shirt with Tims joke thens asks Tim for 50% lol
They just printed it in comic sans font too, they didn't even design it in a way that explains that it's a class name and teacher
Real Business
magnetopenguino That’s not comic sans
I love the subtle agreement of Ben @3:23 while he's not looking at Tim but can tell just from the shift in Tim's vocal direction that it was a rhetorical quip, yet head-nod was quite necessary. Love You Gentlemen~
Building 7 was a stunning estate. It's a shame that it got involved with those twin towers.
Except the controlled demo explosives. But yes and yes.
Reminds me of that tragedy..
d Shiznit i agree 311 was an inside job.
Being a tower is a real knife fight in the big city.
3somes can be explosive, but they can be your downfall.
I can't wait for Trump to pick Candace Owens for the Supreme Court
FIGHT TO KEEP TIM DILLON EPISODES ON JRE.
They're not deleted, but its a knife fight out there.
@Anonymous Automaton probably, yes or yes, genius.
How does Tim defy all known rules of modern entertainment by consistently topping each previous week's episode? Every week is my new favorite episode.
Also, if anyone is interested, I'd love to talk about an exciting business opportunity with the financial wunderkind which is Jewels by podcaster Tim Dillon. But I only have a limited window and scope of investment, and it's shrinking fast. Look forward to talking to one of you lucky future millionaires, soon.
i joined the Pigtreon this week so I can listen to something during walks. I feel dirty but good.
Worth it? And be honest.
Is it just 5 bucks every month?
Hunter Thompson I pay that for some sort of Ubereats pass and barely use it
@@williamsutherland1175 id pay if its 5 bucks.
I pay for Spotify premium so i can download music. And not run up my Mobile Data bill. But other than that Tims patreon would be my only subscription i pay for.
I figure its worth it if i get 2 episodes a week instead of 1.
I cant get enough of Tim.
@@hunterthompson6295 I started with the $5 and ended up paying for the Rothschild's subscription after a couple weeks. For sure worth it but then again I have a dozen random monthly subscriptions to things.
“Are you guys mainly commercial?”
The thin red line sounds like Tim had a nosebleed in 2002 but did it anyway.
Hahaha, great comment
Clever
@Matt Lucas whatever guy with 2 first names
@Matt Lucas don't you have an appointment with your family and bowflex?
Watching Ben cracking up makes this show for me. Yes or yes.
Imagine you think you have a real estate deal and then one of your co workers goes you know tim dillions a comedian
When he laughed during the call it was so organic, tim dillon in fake businesses like a fish in the ocean
I get schoolgirl happy whenever I see a new podcast has been uploaded
Roland Deschain hahahahahahha !
Holy crap dude, you need to give me breathing intermissions, I almost passed out in the first 30mins
Bring back Duncan, the producer of Cuties.
We the people demand it.
The shoutout to hila warmed my heart and reversed my ketamine addiction
Tim is a monster and it is hilarious
Menace to society 😂
33:50 i work at a real estate office in CT so him faking talking to realtors is sooo funny lmaoo that strip mall is still on the market LOL
Let the games begin
CHAOS IS UPON US
Buckle up. Looooove me some Tim
2020 the music video..
m.ua-cam.com/video/W2bc25X0E68/v-deo.html
There was a shooting at my local mall this morning
@@dylon8425
I think that was just gorilla marketing.
“And right there we begin to do fake business”😂
Redirecting homeless is a real thing they buy them one way tickets out of town.
So the real solution to homelessness is to somehow get these millions to distribute themselves acrosst the U.S. mainland to occupy the 18 million vacant lots we currently have. To move to the rural communities? Sounds like they need rural jobs, en masse
Anyone else feel kinda bad for the dude on the other end of Tim's fake business call? He seemed like a decent dude. haha.
No. The dude’s wealthy enough to live near the property he’s showing off. He’s fine
“Fill out a W9 we’ll put you on salary” only a minute in and I lost it
After seeing this I decided to set up my own fake business.
I am now the CEO of an innovative marketing agency that is keen to take your real business to the next level.
Credit to Tim for creating real fake jobs in these tough economic times.
I find myself listening to Tim more now that Rogan has been forced to bend the knee to Spotify and censorship. His podcast is no longer fun. It feels corporate
Am I the only one that could listen to Tim Dillon talk about food all day? Please Tim, make a podcast where you compare different foods.
why is this so fucking addictive
Firefighter here and I can certify that I like heat, have been starting fires for attention, and Tim knows how to properly put out any fire. Hire him now and start a fake Firefighter consulting business.
This guy is a vehicle of Love. I just feel so much love watching him every Sunday noon Philippine - time.
I am here for more Fake Business. My clients are very excited to meet some of your clients. Many of them are in the Canadian region.
A nation’s greatness is measured by how it treats its weakest members.
A nation's only as great as its weakest link.
That would be our schools
Uh, have you not heard of blue chew? There's a whole cottage industry that caters to weak members
I rewatched the Raycon bit like 3 times dying laughing
Tim is my hero, and yes I don’t think I could ever aim higher
"My friend Ryan loved it, he's in rehab now." Lol the way you framed that made it sound like French Toast caused him to spiral.
Tim is the best comic out bar none. Only other guy who’s worth checking out is chris porter
Id say tim n andrew shultz
lots of ben laughing this episode, really wonderful
We want the balcony!
Literally the only podcast I won't skip thru the AD-reads because Tim is hilarious and makes them bearable
Completely agree man
That line about Joe taking one job lol